Help

[Guest guest]

really this is an exam q?From: Aqsa Fatima Burki <aqsaburki@...> Sent: Wed, January 5, 2011 8:31:55 PMSubject: Re: help

lets face it guys most of the questions we get will be from examiner's point of view so even if they are vague you cant just skip the question saying options are vague so considering this was in the exam why not pick the most suitable one and get it done with.My best option is E. thanksAqsaFrom: Neelam Raza <neelamraza@...> Sent: Wed, January 5, 2011 7:51:40 PMSubject: Re: help

yeah bt thats nt in the options c wat i mean abt vague qsFrom: "hassanalmufty@..." <hassanalmufty@...>" " < >Sent: Wed, January 5, 2011 7:06:50 PMSubject: Re: help

The Q doesn't tell the dentist touch the patient nor any treatment Bern done on patient. My answer will be change scaler ( which should ideally be sterilized) and put new gloves then proceed.Sent from my iPhoneOn Jan 5, 2011, at 5:27 PM, Adnan Ashraf <adnanashraf2401@...> wrote:

Normally if dentist had a booster or vaccination in last 12 months then there is no need of any vaccination.But if he had no booster or vaccination in last 12 months then he should have his antibodies level checked & if level is low then he should have a new vaccination not otherwise.

>i think its E

>

>

>

>________________________________

>From: Neelam Raza <neelamraza@...>

>

>Sent: Tue, January 4, 2011 10:58:22 PM

>Subject: Re: help

>

>

>wdnt u remove that nstrument and pick another sterilized one.also change gloves.

>is it jst me or r most of these qs quite vague?

>

>

>

>________________________________

>From: Rumana am <rumana.maryam@...>

>

>Sent: Tue, January 4, 2011 6:43:38 PM

>Subject: help

>

>

>A patient with no positive history came along for scaling. The moment you pick

>up the scaler you punch your finger, what should you do?

>

>A. Complete the procedure as nothing has happened

>B. Check patient’s blood for Hepatitis B antibody HBsAb

>C. Check patient’s blood for Hepatitis B antigen HBsAg

>D. Check dentist’s blood for Hepatitis B antibody HBsAb and HIV antigen HIVAg

>E. Check dentist’s blood for Hepatitis B antigen HBsAg and HIV antibody HIVAb

>F. Dentist should go and take a HBsAb vaccine

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

hey..i absolutely agree wid u aqsa....while reading the questions..one must tke it for granted...that there is a situation...and our answer lies within the options....so lets not think much of wut and how 'we' wud like it...but wut the pragmatic answer cud be!!however i agree wid ur answer...i think it is E..which widt havng thot over wut uv writtn id have absent mindedly said D!E because...a patient having HIVab....(means patient is negative)...and HBsAg means we have to get our boosters into action!best wishessups

>i think its E

>

>

>

>________________________________

>From: Neelam Raza <neelamraza@...>

>

>Sent: Tue, January 4, 2011 10:58:22 PM

>Subject: Re: help

>

>

>wdnt u remove that nstrument and pick another sterilized one.also change gloves.

>is it jst me or r most of these qs quite vague?

>

>

>

>________________________________

>From: Rumana am <rumana.maryam@...>

>

>Sent: Tue, January 4, 2011 6:43:38 PM

>Subject: help

>

>

>A patient with no positive history came along for scaling. The moment you pick

>up the scaler you punch your finger, what should you do?

>

>A. Complete the procedure as nothing has happened

>B. Check patient’s blood for Hepatitis B antibody HBsAb

>C. Check patient’s blood for Hepatitis B antigen HBsAg

>D. Check dentist’s blood for Hepatitis B antibody HBsAb and HIV antigen HIVAg

>E. Check dentist’s blood for Hepatitis B antigen HBsAg and HIV antibody HIVAb

>F. Dentist should go and take a HBsAb vaccine

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Please, please talk to the people at http://AutismTreatment.com -

this worked wonders with my boys. They have info they will send

you, there is TONS of info online - And it WILL help your son.

And you can write me privately if you wish.

On 2/15/2011 6:28 PM, Lynn Barlow wrote:

My son, Bo, is a 7-year-old Aspie in the first

grade in Montgomery County Public School in Alabama.

He stays in trouble at school. If things don't go his

way, he just gets under a table and refuses to do

anything they ask of him. He screams if they try to

get him out from under the table and if they try to

take him out of the classroom they have to take him

out kicking and fighting the whole way. The special

education director tries to hold him down while he is

having his meltdown which makes things worse. I have

told them numerous times that he doesn't want to be

touched. He is very sound sensitive and touch

sensitive. He gets in trouble every day after lunch

when it is time to transition to Math. I personally

think the lunchroom noise gets him headed for a

meltdown each day and then Math sends him right on

over the edge. He is very good at all subjects, but

doesn't like math at all. He is constantly telling

his teacher and the other students to be quiet and

pushes anyone if they touch him or crowd his space.

This past Thursday the school called me at 11:30 and

asked me to come up there. When I arrived, the told

me that Bo was arguing with a girl in his class over a

seat and would not give in and let her sit

there....even though she got to it first. His teacher

pulled him off the seat and attempted to carry him to

the office and he kicked her all the way there. They

told me that they didn't know what to do with Bo and

couldn't handle him so I was required to take him home

and he could not return to school until Monday when

they had a behavior specialist scheduled to come

evaluate him.

I called the school on Friday morning

and

they sent me a copy of the office paper work. Bo

was officially suspended

and could not return until Monday. Monday is when

the behavior specialist

was scheduled to evaluate Bo. I went and spent the

day at the school

waiting on her to arrive. She showed up at 1:00 PM

and Bo's class was about to have a Valentines

Party. She

went and spoke to Bo's teacher in private and then

came and questioned

me. She had a lady that was with her keep me busy

with

questions so she could talk to his teacher in

private. They decided that

Bo needed a break period immediately following lunch

since he tends to get in

trouble every day just after lunch and when they

start working on Math.

They also agreed with me that Bo should have

assigned seating at lunch because

he gets really stressed when he can't sit in his

same spot each day. They

suggested social stories, first/then rewards,

picture schedule.....stuff like

that which I have been requesting since the

beginning of the year. They

also commented that he was seeking attention and

wanted the teachers attention

at all times so maybe he was seeking negative

attention since he wasn't getting

enough positive attention to suit him. The plan was

to start the breaks

today after lunch.

Bo didn't even make it to lunch today. His teacher

said when it came time for them to work independently

that Bo said he needed help. She explained to him how

to do things again and he said he still needed help.

She told him there was nothing else she could help him

with so he got under the table and refused to do his

work. His teacher dragged him out from under the

table and was taking him to the office and he spit on

her. They called my husband, instead of me, and he

just told them to leave the boy alone and call me if

they needed anything else.......I think they are

already tired of dealing with me but oh well there is

much more of me to come! I called the school and

demanded they tell me what was going on. They just

said he had a very rough morning and was going to

spent the remainder of the day with the special ed

director.

When I picked him up this afternoon he told me that

all he wanted was for her to help him spell laugh

because he didn't know how to. He said she started

taking him to the office and he said, OK, I will be

good now but she took him anyway. He was taken to the

special education room and stayed in there the

remainder of today and did no school work. He has a

train set that we sent to school this morning for him

to play with during his cool down time after lunch so

the entire time he was in the special ed

room he was trying to break away from the director and

get to his train set. He said the special ed

director, and "some bossy woman I have never

seen before" just wouldn't leave him alone.

One of the ladies that evaluated him for behavior

strategies is scheduled to go back to his school at

11:30 tomorrow to observe him again, since they didn't

get to see a meltdown.

I am just at my wits end. I don't know where to go

from here. I would appreciate any suggestions.

Many Thanks!

Lynn

[Guest guest]

Lynn my heart breaks reading ur story. I'm in the same boat and don't know what to do. Maybe soon I will get brave enough to post our story. Right now I just lurk and cry for all our kiddos. Luv and haileeSent from my Iphone4On Feb 15, 2011, at 5:28 PM, Lynn Barlow <wlynnbarlow@...> wrote:

My son, Bo, is a 7-year-old Aspie in the first grade in Montgomery County Public School in Alabama. He stays in trouble at school. If things don't go his way, he just gets under a table and refuses to do anything they ask of him. He screams if they try to get him out from under the table and if they try to take him out of the classroom they have to take him out kicking and fighting the whole way. The special education director tries to hold him down while he is having his meltdown which makes things worse. I have told them numerous times that he doesn't want to be touched. He is very sound sensitive and touch sensitive. He gets in trouble every day after lunch when it is time to transition to Math. I personally think the lunchroom noise gets him headed for a meltdown each day and then Math sends him right on over the

edge. He is very good at all subjects, but doesn't like math at all. He is constantly telling his teacher and the other students to be quiet and pushes anyone if they touch him or crowd his space. This past Thursday the school called me at 11:30 and asked me to come up there. When I arrived, the told me that Bo was arguing with a girl in his class over a seat and would not give in and let her sit there....even though she got to it first. His teacher pulled him off the seat and attempted to carry him to the office and he kicked her all the way there. They told me that they didn't know what to do with Bo and couldn't handle him so I was required to take him home and he could not return to school until Monday when they had a behavior specialist scheduled to come evaluate him.

I called the school on Friday morning and

they sent me a copy of the office paper work. Bo was officially suspended

and could not return until Monday. Monday is when the behavior specialist

was scheduled to evaluate Bo. I went and spent the day at the school

waiting on her to arrive. She showed up at 1:00

PM and Bo's class was about to have a Valentines Party. She

went and spoke to Bo's teacher in private and then came and questioned

me. She had a lady that was with her keep me busy with

questions so she could talk to his teacher in private. They decided that

Bo needed a break period immediately following lunch since he tends to get in

trouble every day just after lunch and when they start working on Math.

They also agreed with me that Bo should have assigned seating at lunch because

he gets really stressed when he can't sit in his same spot each day. They

suggested social stories, first/then rewards, picture schedule.....stuff like

that which I have been requesting since the beginning of the year. They

also commented that he was seeking attention and wanted the teachers attention

at all times so maybe he was seeking negative attention since he wasn't getting

enough positive attention to suit him. The plan was to start the breaks

today after lunch.

Bo didn't even make it to lunch today. His teacher said when it came time for them to work independently that Bo said he needed help. She explained to him how to do things again and he said he still needed help. She told him there was nothing else she could help him with so he got under the table and refused to do his work. His teacher dragged him out from under the table and was

taking him to the office and he spit on her. They called my husband, instead of me, and he just told them to leave the boy alone and call me if they needed anything else.......I think they are already tired of dealing with me but oh well there is much more of me to come! I called the school and demanded they tell me what was going on. They just said he had a very rough morning and was going to spent the remainder of the day with the special ed director. When

I picked him up this afternoon he told me that all he wanted was for her to help him spell laugh because he didn't know how to. He said she started taking him to the office and he said, OK, I will be good now but

she took him anyway. He was taken to the special education room and stayed in there the remainder of today and did no school work. He has a train set that we sent

to school this morning for him to play with during his cool down time after lunch so the entire time he was in the special ed room he was trying to break away from the director and get to his train set. He said the special ed director, and "some bossy woman I have never seen before"

just wouldn't leave him alone. One of the ladies that evaluated him for behavior strategies is scheduled to go back

to his school at 11:30 tomorrow to observe him again, since they didn't

get to see a meltdown.I am just at my wits end. I don't know where to go from here. I would appreciate any suggestions. Many Thanks! Lynn

[Guest guest]

Dear Lynn,

How stressful and painful for You.

The problem is that the school people want Bo and all the other children on the spectrum to conform to their standards and rules, while the child on the spectrum wants the school to conform to his or her rules.

And the parent(s) are in the middle of the battle. Not a fun experience for sure.

To me it makes sense to not worry so much about school and simply work to get our children better. Someone just posted a link to the Son-Rise program. We used the Institutes for the Achievement of Human Potential program (www.iahp.org), there's the gf/cf diet and scd diet, and others, low dose heavy metal chelation (autism treatment ).

For encouragement: www.wakingupbaxter.com

There's hyperbaric oxygen therapy, far infrared saunas, regular saunas, exercise. Why not work on eliminating the cause instead of having to deal constantly with the effects, which are agonizing for everybody?

That said, it's hard enough to deal with autism without adding what appear to be somewhat unsympathetic school people and professionals.

Almost 40 years ago, when our daughter was in a diagnostic nursery, we were having a meeting, and the psychologist said my husband had a tight a-h personality, in a roomful of people. It was horrible It doesn't look like there's been that much progress.

You have my sympathy.

Speak with Him Thou for He hearest.

Spirit with Spirit can speak.

Closer is Love than breathing,

Nearer than hands and feet.

(with appreciation for Tennyson)

help

My son, Bo, is a 7-year-old Aspie in the first grade in Montgomery County Public School in Alabama. He stays in trouble at school. If things don't go his way, he just gets under a table and refuses to do anything they ask of him. He screams if they try to get him out from under the table and if they try to take him out of the classroom they have to take him out kicking and fighting the whole way. The special education director tries to hold him down while he is having his meltdown which makes things worse. I have told them numerous times that he doesn't want to be touched. He is very sound sensitive and touch sensitive. He gets in trouble every day after lunch when it is time to transition to Math. I personally think the lunchroom noise gets him headed for a meltdown each day and then Math sends him right on over the edge. He is very good at all subjects, but doesn't like math at all. He is constantly telling his teacher and the other students to be quiet and pushes anyone if they touch him or crowd his space.

This past Thursday the school called me at 11:30 and asked me to come up there. When I arrived, the told me that Bo was arguing with a girl in his class over a seat and would not give in and let her sit there....even though she got to it first. His teacher pulled him off the seat and attempted to carry him to the office and he kicked her all the way there. They told me that they didn't know what to do with Bo and couldn't handle him so I was required to take him home and he could not return to school until Monday when they had a behavior specialist scheduled to come evaluate him.

I called the school on Friday morning and they sent me a copy of the office paper work. Bo was officially suspended and could not return until Monday. Monday is when the behavior specialist was scheduled to evaluate Bo. I went and spent the day at the school waiting on her to arrive. She showed up at 1:00 PM and Bo's class was about to have a Valentines Party. She went and spoke to Bo's teacher in private and then came and questioned me. She had a lady that was with her keep me busy with questions so she could talk to his teacher in private. They decided that Bo needed a break period immediately following lunch since he tends to get in trouble every day just after lunch and when they start working on Math. They also agreed with me that Bo should have assigned seating at lunch because he gets really stressed when he can't sit in his same spot each day. They suggested social stories, first/then rewards, picture schedule.....stuff like that which I have been requesting since the beginning of the year. They also commented that he was seeking attention and wanted the teachers attention at all times so maybe he was seeking negative attention since he wasn't getting enough positive attention to suit him. The plan was to start the breaks today after lunch.

Bo didn't even make it to lunch today. His teacher said when it came time for them to work independently that Bo said he needed help. She explained to him how to do things again and he said he still needed help. She told him there was nothing else she could help him with so he got under the table and refused to do his work. His teacher dragged him out from under the table and was taking him to the office and he spit on her. They called my husband, instead of me, and he just told them to leave the boy alone and call me if they needed anything else.......I think they are already tired of dealing with me but oh well there is much more of me to come! I called the school and demanded they tell me what was going on. They just said he had a very rough morning and was going to spent the remainder of the day with the special ed director.

When I picked him up this afternoon he told me that all he wanted was for her to help him spell laugh because he didn't know how to. He said she started taking him to the office and he said, OK, I will be good now but she took him anyway. He was taken to the special education room and stayed in there the remainder of today and did no school work. He has a train set that we sent to school this morning for him to play with during his cool down time after lunch so the entire time he was in the special ed room he was trying to break away from the director and get to his train set. He said the special ed director, and "some bossy woman I have never seen before" just wouldn't leave him alone.

One of the ladies that evaluated him for behavior strategies is scheduled to go back to his school at 11:30 tomorrow to observe him again, since they didn't get to see a meltdown.

I am just at my wits end. I don't know where to go from here. I would appreciate any suggestions.

Many Thanks!

Lynn

[Guest guest]

This is a terrific opportunity however the financial strain it will create for your family is enormous, sunrise seems great, however whom do you leave your asd kiddo with for the week+ duration you are there training? It isnt an option to invite the teachers to attend as they will refuse unfortunately, if all educators in our school could attend a two week session at sunrise none I mean none of our kids at school would be in this huge circle of conflict and anxiety the children would be well understood.

Kirkland's burg Ontario CANADA

On Tue, Feb 15, 2011 at 8:01 PM, Reszetylo <sparklesperson@...> wrote:

 

Please, please talk to the people at http://AutismTreatment.com - this worked wonders with my boys.  They have info they will send you, there is TONS of info online - And it WILL help your son. 

And you can write me privately if you wish.

On 2/15/2011 6:28 PM, Lynn Barlow wrote:  

My son, Bo, is a 7-year-old Aspie in the first grade in Montgomery County Public School in Alabama.  He stays in trouble at school.  If things don't go his way, he just gets under a table and refuses to do anything they ask of him.  He screams if they try to get him out from under the table and if they try to take him out of the classroom they have to take him out kicking and fighting the whole way.  The special education director tries to hold him down while he is having his meltdown which makes things worse.  I have told them numerous times that he doesn't want to be touched.  He is very sound sensitive and touch sensitive.  He gets in trouble every day after lunch when it is time to transition to Math.  I personally think the lunchroom noise gets him headed for a meltdown each day and then Math sends him right on over the edge.  He is very good at all subjects, but doesn't like math at all.  He is constantly telling his teacher and the other students to be quiet and pushes anyone if they touch him or crowd his space. 

This past Thursday the school called me at 11:30 and asked me to come up there.  When I arrived, the told me that Bo was arguing with a girl in his class over a seat and would not give in and let her sit there....even though she got to it first.  His teacher pulled him off the seat and attempted to carry him to the office and he kicked her all the way there.  They told me that they didn't know what to do with Bo and couldn't handle him so I was required to take him home and he could not return to school until Monday when they had a behavior specialist scheduled to come evaluate him. 

I called the school on Friday morning and they sent me a copy of the office paper work.  Bo was officially suspended and could not return until Monday.  Monday is when the behavior specialist was scheduled to evaluate Bo.  I went and spent the day at the school waiting on her to arrive.  She showed up at 1:00 PM and Bo's class was about to have a Valentines Party.  She went and spoke to Bo's teacher in private and then came and questioned me.  She had a lady that was with her keep me busy with questions so she could talk to his teacher in private.  They decided that Bo needed a break period immediately following lunch since he tends to get in trouble every day just after lunch and when they start working on Math.  They also agreed with me that Bo should have assigned seating at lunch because he gets really stressed when he can't sit in his same spot each day.  They suggested social stories, first/then rewards, picture schedule.....stuff like that which I have been requesting since the beginning of the year.  They also commented that he was seeking attention and wanted the teachers attention at all times so maybe he was seeking negative attention since he wasn't getting enough positive attention to suit him.  The plan was to start the breaks today after lunch. 

Bo didn't even make it to lunch today.  His teacher said when it came time for them to work independently that Bo said he needed help.  She explained to him how to do things again and he said he still needed help.  She told him there was nothing else she could help him with so he got under the table and refused to do his work.  His teacher dragged him out from under the table and was taking him to the office and he spit on her.  They called my husband, instead of me, and he just told them to leave the boy alone and call me if they needed anything else.......I think they are already tired of dealing with me but oh well there is much more of me to come!  I called the school and demanded they tell me what was going on.  They just said he had a very rough morning and was going to spent the remainder of the day with the special ed director. 

When I picked him up this afternoon he told me that all he wanted was for her to help him spell laugh because he didn't know how to.  He said she started taking him to the office and he said, OK, I will be good now but she took him anyway.  He was taken to the special education room and stayed in there the remainder of today and did no school work.  He has a train set that we sent to school this morning for him to play with during his cool down time after lunch so the entire time he was in the special ed room he was trying to break away from the director and get to his train set.  He said the special ed director, and " some bossy woman I have never seen before " just wouldn't leave him alone. 

One of the ladies that evaluated him for behavior strategies is scheduled to go back to his school at 11:30 tomorrow to observe him again, since they didn't get to see a meltdown.I am just at my wits end.  I don't know where to go from here.  I would appreciate any suggestions. 

Many Thanks! Lynn

[Guest guest]

Today was another bad day at school for Bo. He was good through the morning and got to have his train time but then had a meltdown at Math again. He wanted the teacher to stay with him and when she didn't, he had a meltdown and had to go to the special ed room but did do his math in there.....but not without a fight. He was spitting and kicking again. The behavior specialist was there and witnessed his behavior. She said he is VERY OPPOSITIONAL and DEFIANT...and that she was very surprised to see a child on the spectrum be this manipulative and defiant. She seemed to be questioning his diagnosis. She told me to contact his physician and see if maybe the Claritin he has been taking for his allergies is making him unusually defiant. I hate to tell her but Bo is just being the same Bo that he always is if he doesn't get his

way and/or can't control the situation.

She then proceeded to tell me that tomorrow they are not going to let him have his train time until after Math.....we will see how that goes. They are hoping the social stories, picture schedule, later train time...and pulling him from the classroom for the remainder of the day if he misbehaves will work.

If that doesn't work then the plan is to pull him from class completely and make him earn time back in his classroom??? From: Lynn Barlow <wlynnbarlow@...>Autism and Aspergers Treatment Sent: Tue, February 15, 2011 6:28:33 PMSubject: help

My son, Bo, is a 7-year-old Aspie in the first grade in Montgomery County Public School in Alabama. He stays in trouble at school. If things don't go his way, he just gets under a table and refuses to do anything they ask of him. He screams if they try to get him out from under the table and if they try to take him out of the classroom they have to take him out kicking and fighting the whole way. The special education director tries to hold him down while he is having his meltdown which makes things worse. I have told them numerous times that he doesn't want to be touched. He is very sound sensitive and touch sensitive. He gets in trouble every day after lunch when it is time to transition to Math. I personally think the lunchroom noise gets him headed for a meltdown each day and then Math sends him right on over the

edge. He is very good at all subjects, but doesn't like math at all. He is constantly telling his teacher and the other students to be quiet and pushes anyone if they touch him or crowd his space. This past Thursday the school called me at 11:30 and asked me to come up there. When I arrived, the told me that Bo was arguing with a girl in his class over a seat and would not give in and let her sit there....even though she got to it first. His teacher pulled him off the seat and attempted to carry him to the office and he kicked her all the way there. They told me that they didn't know what to do with Bo and couldn't handle him so I was required to take him home and he could not return to school until Monday when they had a behavior specialist scheduled to come evaluate him.

I called the school on Friday morning and

they sent me a copy of the office paper work. Bo was officially suspended

and could not return until Monday. Monday is when the behavior specialist

was scheduled to evaluate Bo. I went and spent the day at the school

waiting on her to arrive. She showed up at 1:00

PM and Bo's class was about to have a Valentines Party. She

went and spoke to Bo's teacher in private and then came and questioned

me. She had a lady that was with her keep me busy with

questions so she could talk to his teacher in private. They decided that

Bo needed a break period immediately following lunch since he tends to get in

trouble every day just after lunch and when they start working on Math.

They also agreed with me that Bo should have assigned seating at lunch because

he gets really stressed when he can't sit in his same spot each day. They

suggested social stories, first/then rewards, picture schedule.....stuff like

that which I have been requesting since the beginning of the year. They

also commented that he was seeking attention and wanted the teachers attention

at all times so maybe he was seeking negative attention since he wasn't getting

enough positive attention to suit him. The plan was to start the breaks

today after lunch.

Bo didn't even make it to lunch today. His teacher said when it came time for them to work independently that Bo said he needed help. She explained to him how to do things again and he said he still needed help. She told him there was nothing else she could help him with so he got under the table and refused to do his work. His teacher dragged him out from under the table and was

taking him to the office and he spit on her. They called my husband, instead of me, and he just told them to leave the boy alone and call me if they needed anything else.......I think they are already tired of dealing with me but oh well there is much more of me to come! I called the school and demanded they tell me what was going on. They just said he had a very rough morning and was going to spent the remainder of the day with the special ed director. When

I picked him up this afternoon he told me that all he wanted was for her to help him spell laugh because he didn't know how to. He said she started taking him to the office and he said, OK, I will be good now but

she took him anyway. He was taken to the special education room and stayed in there the remainder of today and did no school work. He has a train set that we sent

to school this morning for him to play with during his cool down time after lunch so the entire time he was in the special ed room he was trying to break away from the director and get to his train set. He said the special ed director, and "some bossy woman I have never seen before"

just wouldn't leave him alone. One of the ladies that evaluated him for behavior strategies is scheduled to go back

to his school at 11:30 tomorrow to observe him again, since they didn't

get to see a meltdown.I am just at my wits end. I don't know where to go from here. I would appreciate any suggestions. Many Thanks! Lynn

[Guest guest]

On Wed, Feb 16, 2011 at 7:52 PM, Lynn Barlow <wlynnbarlow@...> wrote:

 

Today was another bad day at school for Bo.  He was good through the morning and got to have his train time but then had a meltdown at Math again. Why? Did you ask what happened so that you understand what really happened? He wanted the teacher to stay with him and when she didn't, Did your son agree with this part? Not enough of a story to me to understand the cause/trigger for your son. he had a meltdown and had to go to the special ed room but did do his math in there.....but not without a fight.  He was spitting and kicking again.  Did they tell you what THEY were doing? Did they offer information on how they handled the situation or any ideas on what the trigger was? The behavior specialist was there and witnessed his behavior.  She said he is VERY OPPOSITIONAL and DEFIANT...and that she was very surprised to see a child on the spectrum be this manipulative and defiant. What are her credentials, btw? Many behavior specialists are merely trained understanding MR (mental retardation) in case you didn't know.  I would have to imagine that this " specialist " took notes if she was observing. Send her an email asking for her notes. Uh, and no, her verbal response is not good enough. If she did take notes, I can guarantee you they are in your son's record. She seemed to be questioning his diagnosis.  She told me to contact his physician and see if maybe the Claritin he has been taking for his allergies is making him unusually defiant. Gee, it's all your kid, huh?  I hate to tell her but Bo is just being the same Bo that he always is if he doesn't get his

way and/or can't control the situation.  I don't buy into this. Many kids are so insecure without routine that they go out of their way to show us how much they need routine and familiarity by acting out until we give them the structure they need to cope.  I see the writing on the wall for your son. The school's next step is to make your son submit to them. Those bozo's have it all wrong and they are, as usual, inadequately trained and blaming your kid for their lack of understanding his diagnosis and how to interact with him. Be very afraid when schools use the words: Defiant or oppositional. These are buzz words for we have no training and we will label your kid a behavioral problem.

She then proceeded to tell me that tomorrow they are not going to let him have his train time until after Math.....we will see how that goes.  They are hoping the social stories, picture schedule, later train time...and pulling him from the classroom for the remainder of the day if he misbehaves will work. Yeah, they'll punish him into submission alright.

If that doesn't work then the plan is to pull him from class completely and make him earn time back in his classroom??? It's all backwards. They want to punish HIM for their deficits in training and understanding your son's disability. Btw, is this in writing? You need to--tonight--write a memo for the record on what transpired today. I would then call an iep meeting and ask the team to examine what's not working in the iep and then revise it. Your son needs some positive behavioral interventions NOW. Request a FBA, but do it in writing. It is an IEP decision which is why you need to call an IEP meeting right away. Btw, They cannot unilaterally decide to make placement changes like taking his from the classroom without prior written notice. Do not agree to let that happen. This is just so wrong.

From: Lynn Barlow <wlynnbarlow@...>

Autism and Aspergers Treatment Sent: Tue, February 15, 2011 6:28:33 PM

Subject: help

 

My son, Bo, is a 7-year-old Aspie in the first grade in Montgomery County Public School in Alabama.  He stays in trouble at school.  If things don't go his way, he just gets under a table and refuses to do anything they ask of him.  He screams if they try to get him out from under the table and if they try to take him out of the classroom they have to take him out kicking and fighting the whole way.  The special education director tries to hold him down while he is having his meltdown which makes things worse.  I have told them numerous times that he doesn't want to be touched.  He is very sound sensitive and touch sensitive.  He gets in trouble every day after lunch when it is time to transition to Math.  I personally think the lunchroom noise gets him headed for a meltdown each day and then Math sends him right on over the

edge.  He is very good at all subjects, but doesn't like math at all.  He is constantly telling his teacher and the other students to be quiet and pushes anyone if they touch him or crowd his space.  This past Thursday the school called me at 11:30 and asked me to come up there.  When I arrived, the told me that Bo was arguing with a girl in his class over a seat and would not give in and let her sit there....even though she got to it first.  His teacher pulled him off the seat and attempted to carry him to the office and he kicked her all the way there.  They told me that they didn't know what to do with Bo and couldn't handle him so I was required to take him home and he could not return to school until Monday when they had a behavior specialist scheduled to come evaluate him. 

I called the school on Friday morning and

they sent me a copy of the office paper work.  Bo was officially suspended

and could not return until Monday.  Monday is when the behavior specialist

was scheduled to evaluate Bo.  I went and spent the day at the school

waiting on her to arrive.  She showed up at 1:00

PM and Bo's class was about to have a Valentines Party.  She

went and spoke to Bo's teacher in private and then came and questioned

me.  She had a lady that was with her keep me busy with

questions so she could talk to his teacher in private.  They decided that

Bo needed a break period immediately following lunch since he tends to get in

trouble every day just after lunch and when they start working on Math. 

They also agreed with me that Bo should have assigned seating at lunch because

he gets really stressed when he can't sit in his same spot each day.  They

suggested social stories, first/then rewards, picture schedule.....stuff like

that which I have been requesting since the beginning of the year.  They

also commented that he was seeking attention and wanted the teachers attention

at all times so maybe he was seeking negative attention since he wasn't getting

enough positive attention to suit him.  The plan was to start the breaks

today after lunch. 

Bo didn't even make it to lunch today.  His teacher said when it came time for them to work independently that Bo said he needed help.  She explained to him how to do things again and he said he still needed help.  She told him there was nothing else she could help him with so he got under the table and refused to do his work.  His teacher dragged him out from under the table and was

taking him to the office and he spit on her.  They called my husband, instead of me, and he just told them to leave the boy alone and call me if they needed anything else.......I think they are already tired of dealing with me but oh well there is much more of me to come!  I called the school and demanded they tell me what was going on.  They just said he had a very rough morning and was going to spent the remainder of the day with the special ed director. 

When

I picked him up this afternoon he told me that all he wanted was for her to help him spell laugh because he didn't know how to.  He said she started taking him to the office and he said, OK, I will be good now but

she took him anyway.  He was taken to the special education room and stayed in there the remainder of today and did no school work.  He has a train set that we sent

to school this morning for him to play with during his cool down time after lunch so the entire time he was in the special ed room he was trying to break away from the director and get to his train set.  He said the special ed director, and " some bossy woman I have never seen before "

just wouldn't leave him alone.  One of the ladies that evaluated him for behavior strategies is scheduled to go back

to his school at 11:30 tomorrow to observe him again, since they didn't

get to see a meltdown.I am just at my wits end.  I don't know where to go from here.  I would appreciate any suggestions.  Many Thanks! Lynn

[Guest guest]



Manipulative and defiant are two of the hallmarks of kids with autism what on earth did she mean?

If he doesn't like the room during math there probably is a sensory reason or if it is just math then he needs more support to know how to do the assignments pulling him out when he misbehaves is a reward for bad behavior not a good idea

I have never heard of Claritin causing defiant behavior unless it is wearing off and he is feeling the allergies more

is math just before or after lunch? perhaps he is hungry or eating something that causes him problems?

our kids need to know what is going to happen in a lot of cases that is why they like to control the situations perhaps they need to give him more information or more control on how he does the work -do all the odd problems first then the even ones stuff like that

earn time back in with peers is backwards pulling him out all day to do this is just wrong they need a better behavior plan

and yes request it in writing

Today was another bad day at school for Bo. He was good through the morning and got to have his train time but then had a meltdown at Math again. He wanted the teacher to stay with him and when she didn't, he had a meltdown and had to go to the special ed room but did do his math in there.....but not without a fight. He was spitting and kicking again. The behavior specialist was there and witnessed his behavior. She said he is VERY OPPOSITIONAL and DEFIANT...and that she was very surprised to see a child on the spectrum be this manipulative and defiant. She seemed to be questioning his diagnosis. She told me to contact his physician and see if maybe the Claritin he has been taking for his allergies is making him unusually defiant. I hate to tell her but Bo is just being the same Bo that he always is if he doesn't get his way and/or can't control the situation. She then proceeded to tell me that tomorrow they are not going to let him have his train time until after Math.....we will see how that goes. They are hoping the social stories, picture schedule, later train time...and pulling him from the classroom for the remainder of the day if he misbehaves will work.If that doesn't work then the plan is to pull him from class completely and make him earn time back in his classroom???

From: Lynn Barlow <wlynnbarlow@...>Autism and Aspergers Treatment Sent: Tue, February 15, 2011 6:28:33 PMSubject: help

My son, Bo, is a 7-year-old Aspie in the first grade in Montgomery County Public School in Alabama. He stays in trouble at school. If things don't go his way, he just gets under a table and refuses to do anything they ask of him. He screams if they try to get him out from under the table and if they try to take him out of the classroom they have to take him out kicking and fighting the whole way. The special education director tries to hold him down while he is having his meltdown which makes things worse. I have told them numerous times that he doesn't want to be touched. He is very sound sensitive and touch sensitive. He gets in trouble every day after lunch when it is time to transition to Math. I personally think the lunchroom noise gets him headed for a meltdown each day and then Math sends him right on over the edge. He is very good at all subjects, but doesn't like math at all. He is constantly telling his teacher and the other students to be quiet and pushes anyone if they touch him or crowd his space. This past Thursday the school called me at 11:30 and asked me to come up there. When I arrived, the told me that Bo was arguing with a girl in his class over a seat and would not give in and let her sit there....even though she got to it first. His teacher pulled him off the seat and attempted to carry him to the office and he kicked her all the way there. They told me that they didn't know what to do with Bo and couldn't handle him so I was required to take him home and he could not return to school until Monday when they had a behavior specialist scheduled to come evaluate him.

I called the school on Friday morning and they sent me a copy of the office paper work. Bo was officially suspended and could not return until Monday. Monday is when the behavior specialist was scheduled to evaluate Bo. I went and spent the day at the school waiting on her to arrive. She showed up at 1:00 PM and Bo's class was about to have a Valentines Party. She went and spoke to Bo's teacher in private and then came and questioned me. She had a lady that was with her keep me busy with questions so she could talk to his teacher in private. They decided that Bo needed a break period immediately following lunch since he tends to get in trouble every day just after lunch and when they start working on Math. They also agreed with me that Bo should have assigned seating at lunch because he gets really stressed when he can't sit in his same spot each day. They suggested social stories, first/then rewards, picture schedule.....stuff like that which I have been requesting since the beginning of the year. They also commented that he was seeking attention and wanted the teachers attention at all times so maybe he was seeking negative attention since he wasn't getting enough positive attention to suit him. The plan was to start the breaks today after lunch. Bo didn't even make it to lunch today. His teacher said when it came time for them to work independently that Bo said he needed help. She explained to him how to do things again and he said he still needed help. She told him there was nothing else she could help him with so he got under the table and refused to do his work. His teacher dragged him out from under the table and was taking him to the office and he spit on her. They called my husband, instead of me, and he just told them to leave the boy alone and call me if they needed anything else.......I think they are already tired of dealing with me but oh well there is much more of me to come! I called the school and demanded they tell me what was going on. They just said he had a very rough morning and was going to spent the remainder of the day with the special ed director. When I picked him up this afternoon he told me that all he wanted was for her to help him spell laugh because he didn't know how to. He said she started taking him to the office and he said, OK, I will be good now but she took him anyway. He was taken to the special education room and stayed in there the remainder of today and did no school work. He has a train set that we sent to school this morning for him to play with during his cool down time after lunch so the entire time he was in the special ed room he was trying to break away from the director and get to his train set. He said the special ed director, and "some bossy woman I have never seen before" just wouldn't leave him alone. One of the ladies that evaluated him for behavior strategies is scheduled to go back to his school at 11:30 tomorrow to observe him again, since they didn't get to see a meltdown.I am just at my wits end. I don't know where to go from here. I would appreciate any suggestions. Many Thanks! Lynn

No virus found in this message.Checked by AVG - www.avg.comVersion: 10.0.1204 / Virus Database: 1435/3447 - Release Date: 02/16/11

[Guest guest]

All subjects are in the same classroom...but Math is right after lunch time in a very loud lunchroom. The behavior lady said she didn't see any sensory triggers, that Bo was fine until he didnt have all of the teachers attention. Bo told me he asked for help and the teacher showed him again and then he tried to do it and she came around and told him it was the wrong answer to try again.....he then went into the meltdown. He has a lot of anxiety and is very afraid that he is going to do something incorrectly. I definitely think they are trying to label him a behavior problem and nothing else. They are supposedly scheduling a FBA and will notify me when the meeting is scheduled. From: Caudle <cindyc@...>Autism and Aspergers Treatment Sent: Wed, February 16, 2011 7:43:39 PMSubject: Re: help



Manipulative and defiant are two of the hallmarks of kids with autism what on earth did she mean?

If he doesn't like the room during math there probably is a sensory reason or if it is just math then he needs more support to know how to do the assignments pulling him out when he misbehaves is a reward for bad behavior not a good idea

I have never heard of Claritin causing defiant behavior unless it is wearing off and he is feeling the allergies more

is math just before or after lunch? perhaps he is hungry or eating something that causes him problems?

our kids need to know what is going to happen in a lot of cases that is why they like to control the situations perhaps they need to give him more information or more control on how he does the work -do all the odd problems first then the even ones stuff like that

earn time back in with peers is backwards pulling him out all day to do this is just wrong they need a better behavior plan

and yes request it in writing

Today was another bad day at school for Bo. He was good through the morning and got to have his train time but then had a meltdown at Math again. He wanted the teacher to stay with him and when she didn't, he had a meltdown and had to go to the special ed room but did do his math in there.....but not without a fight. He was spitting and kicking again. The behavior specialist was there and witnessed his behavior. She said he is VERY OPPOSITIONAL and DEFIANT...and that she was very surprised to see a child on the spectrum be this manipulative and defiant. She seemed to be questioning his diagnosis. She told me to contact his physician and see if maybe the Claritin he has been taking for his allergies is making him unusually defiant. I hate to tell her but Bo is just being the same Bo that he always is if he doesn't get his way and/or can't control the situation. She then proceeded to tell me that tomorrow they are not going to let him have his train time until after Math.....we will see how that goes. They are hoping the social stories, picture schedule, later train time...and pulling him from the classroom for the remainder of the day if he misbehaves will work.If that doesn't work then the plan is to pull him from class completely and make him earn time back in his classroom???

From: Lynn Barlow <wlynnbarlow@...>Autism and Aspergers Treatment Sent: Tue, February 15, 2011 6:28:33 PMSubject: help

My son, Bo, is a 7-year-old Aspie in the first grade in Montgomery County Public School in Alabama. He stays in trouble at school. If things don't go his way, he just gets under a table and refuses to do anything they ask of him. He screams if they try to get him out from under the table and if they try to take him out of the classroom they have to take him out kicking and fighting the whole way. The special education director tries to hold him down while he is having his meltdown which makes things worse. I have told them numerous times that he doesn't want to be touched. He is very sound sensitive and touch sensitive. He gets in trouble every day after lunch when it is time to transition to Math. I personally think the lunchroom noise gets him headed for a meltdown each day and then Math sends him right on over the edge. He is very good at all subjects, but doesn't like math at all. He is constantly telling his teacher and the other students to be quiet and pushes anyone if they touch him or crowd his space. This past Thursday the school called me at 11:30 and asked me to come up there. When I arrived, the told me that Bo was arguing with a girl in his class over a seat and would not give in and let her sit there....even though she got to it first. His teacher pulled him off the seat and attempted to carry him to the office and he kicked her all the way there. They told me that they didn't know what to do with Bo and couldn't handle him so I was required to take him home and he could not return to school until Monday when they had a behavior specialist scheduled to come evaluate him.

I called the school on Friday morning and they sent me a copy of the office paper work. Bo was officially suspended and could not return until Monday. Monday is when the behavior specialist was scheduled to evaluate Bo. I went and spent the day at the school waiting on her to arrive. She showed up at 1:00 PM and Bo's class was about to have a Valentines Party. She went and spoke to Bo's teacher in private and then came and questioned me. She had a lady that was with her keep me busy with questions so she could talk to his teacher in private. They decided that Bo needed a break period immediately following lunch since he tends to get in trouble every day just after lunch and when they start working on Math. They also agreed with me that Bo should have assigned seating at lunch because he gets really stressed when he can't sit in his same spot each day. They suggested social stories, first/then rewards, picture schedule.....stuff like that which I have been requesting since the beginning of the year. They also commented that he was seeking attention and wanted the teachers attention at all times so maybe he was seeking negative attention since he wasn't getting enough positive attention to suit him. The plan was to start the breaks today after lunch. Bo didn't even make it to lunch today. His teacher said when it came time for them to work independently that Bo said he needed help. She explained to him how to do things again and he said he still needed help. She told him there was nothing else she could help him with so he got under the table and refused to do his work. His teacher dragged him out from under the table and was taking him to the office and he spit on her. They called my husband, instead of me, and he just told them to leave the boy alone and call me if they needed anything else.......I think they are already tired of dealing with me but oh well there is much more of me to come! I called the school and demanded they tell me what was going on. They just said he had a very rough morning and was going to spent the remainder of the day with the special ed director. When I picked him up this afternoon he told me that all he wanted was for her to help him spell laugh because he didn't know how to. He said she started taking him to the office and he said, OK, I will be good now but she took him anyway. He was taken to the special education room and stayed in there the remainder of today and did no school work. He has a train set that we sent to school this morning for him to play with during his cool down time after lunch so the entire time he was in the special ed room he was trying to break away from the director and get to his train set. He said the special ed director, and "some bossy woman I have never seen before" just wouldn't leave him alone. One of the ladies that evaluated him for behavior strategies is scheduled to go back to his school at 11:30 tomorrow to observe him again, since they didn't get to see a meltdown.I am just at my wits end. I don't know where to go from here. I would appreciate any suggestions. Many Thanks! Lynn

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[Guest guest]

To me this seems to be a misunderstanding of an individual on the spectrum. It is people who mis-applly ABA/Behaviour mod. techniques that are very frustrating. Sounds like they need to read the book about Pedro and his whale or just start using the slogan, "just give him the whale." Meaning they should use his train passion in math to motivate him...maybe have a math question with trains. This also seems to happen when people misuse strategies to control instead of shape into more positive ones... Just a few thoughts... Plus what if something in trains is his eventual career area..what a shame to eliminate that.

The behavioural specialist should also know that all students on the spectrum are different and sometimes what we view as manipulation is often just confused motives.

From: Caudle <cindyc@...>Autism and Aspergers Treatment Sent: Wed, February 16, 2011 7:43:39 PMSubject: Re: help

 Manipulative and defiant are two of the hallmarks of kids with autism what on earth did she mean?

If he doesn't like the room during math there probably is a sensory reason or if it is just math then he needs more support to know how to do the assignments pulling him out when he misbehaves is a reward for bad behavior not a good idea

I have never heard of Claritin causing defiant behavior unless it is wearing off and he is feeling the allergies more

is math just before or after lunch? perhaps he is hungry or eating something that causes him problems?

our kids need to know what is going to happen in a lot of cases that is why they like to control the situations perhaps they need to give him more information or more control on how he does the work -do all the odd problems first then the even ones stuff like that

earn time back in with peers is backwards pulling him out all day to do this is just wrong they need a better behavior plan

and yes request it in writing

Today was another bad day at school for Bo. He was good through the morning and got to have his train time but then had a meltdown at Math again. He wanted the teacher to stay with him and when she didn't, he had a meltdown and had to go to the special ed room but did do his math in there.....but not without a fight. He was spitting and kicking again. The behavior specialist was there and witnessed his behavior. She said he is VERY OPPOSITIONAL and DEFIANT...and that she was very surprised to see a child on the spectrum be this manipulative and defiant. She seemed to be questioning his diagnosis. She told me to contact his physician and see if maybe the Claritin he has been taking for his allergies is making him unusually defiant. I hate to tell her but Bo is just being the same Bo that he always is if he doesn't get his way

and/or can't control the situation. She then proceeded to tell me that tomorrow they are not going to let him have his train time until after Math.....we will see how that goes. They are hoping the social stories, picture schedule, later train time...and pulling him from the classroom for the remainder of the day if he misbehaves will work.If that doesn't work then the plan is to pull him from class completely and make him earn time back in his classroom???

From: Lynn Barlow <wlynnbarlow@...>Autism and Aspergers Treatment Sent: Tue, February 15, 2011 6:28:33 PMSubject: help

My son, Bo, is a 7-year-old Aspie in the first grade in Montgomery County Public School in Alabama. He stays in trouble at school. If things don't go his way, he just gets under a table and refuses to do anything they ask of him. He screams if they try to get him out from under the table and if they try to take him out of the classroom they have to take him out kicking and fighting the whole way. The special education director tries to hold him down while he is having his meltdown which makes things worse. I have told them numerous times that he doesn't want to be touched. He is very sound sensitive and touch sensitive. He gets in trouble every day after lunch when it is time to transition to Math. I personally think the lunchroom noise gets him headed for a meltdown each day and then Math sends him right on over the edge. He is very good at all subjects, but doesn't like math at all. He is

constantly telling his teacher and the other students to be quiet and pushes anyone if they touch him or crowd his space. This past Thursday the school called me at 11:30 and asked me to come up there. When I arrived, the told me that Bo was arguing with a girl in his class over a seat and would not give in and let her sit there....even though she got to it first. His teacher pulled him off the seat and attempted to carry him to the office and he kicked her all the way there. They told me that they didn't know what to do with Bo and couldn't handle him so I was required to take him home and he could not return to school until Monday when they had a behavior specialist scheduled to come evaluate him.

I called the school on Friday morning and they sent me a copy of the office paper work. Bo was officially suspended and could not return until Monday. Monday is when the behavior specialist was scheduled to evaluate Bo. I went and spent the day at the school waiting on her to arrive. She showed up at 1:00 PM and Bo's class was about to have a Valentines Party. She went and spoke to Bo's teacher in private and then came and questioned me. She had a lady that was with her keep me busy with questions so she could talk to his teacher in private. They decided that Bo needed a break period immediately following lunch since he tends to get in trouble every day just after lunch and when they start working on Math. They also agreed with me that Bo should have assigned seating at lunch because he gets really stressed

when he can't sit in his same spot each day. They suggested social stories, first/then rewards, picture schedule.....stuff like that which I have been requesting since the beginning of the year. They also commented that he was seeking attention and wanted the teachers attention at all times so maybe he was seeking negative attention since he wasn't getting enough positive attention to suit him. The plan was to start the breaks today after lunch. Bo didn't even make it to lunch today. His teacher said when it came time for them to work independently that Bo said he needed help. She explained to him how to do things again and he said he still needed help. She told him there was nothing else she could help him with so he got under the table and refused to do his work. His teacher dragged him out from under the table and was taking him to the office and he spit on her. They called my husband,

instead of me, and he just told them to leave the boy alone and call me if they needed anything else.......I think they are already tired of dealing with me but oh well there is much more of me to come! I called the school and demanded they tell me what was going on. They just said he had a very rough morning and was going to spent the remainder of the day with the special ed director. When I picked him up this afternoon he told me that all he wanted was for her to help him spell laugh because he didn't know how to. He said she started taking him to the office and he said, OK, I will be good now but she took him anyway. He was taken to the special education room and stayed in there the remainder of today and did no school work. He has a train set that we sent to school this morning for him to play with during his cool down time after lunch so the entire time he was in the special ed room he was trying to break away from the director and get to his train set. He said the special ed director, and "some bossy woman I have never seen before" just wouldn't leave him alone. One of the ladies that evaluated him for behavior strategies is scheduled to go back to his school at 11:30 tomorrow to observe him again, since they didn't get to see a meltdown.I am just at my wits end. I don't know where to go from here. I would appreciate any suggestions. Many Thanks! Lynn

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[Guest guest]



Is the behavior specialist experienced with spectrum kids? I would be sort of annoyed that she is acting like a Dr. and suggesting it could be this or that. But I will admit to you, in hopes it can be helpful- when I take Clariton or any allergy meds it makes me sooooo irritable, tired and hungry. I always try to avoid it. I feel like it makes my skin feel weird and I want to claw it off! Recently I found a homeopathic allergy medicine and just so you know, I'm not one that is normally into that sort of thing so I'm not preaching or pushing natural - I just stumbled on it one day and thought I'd give it a try - no side effects I live with it now. It's a brand called Boiron you can look it up on the internet and they have a whole list of different ones but the one I used is for Hayfever - even though its not really specifically hayfever.... Is there a WholeFoods or a small private store that might sell it near you?

Anyway, Im not sure about this but isn't the behavior specialist supposed to focus on positive reinforcement ? Has she set up a REWARD system or does she plan to? Because that is more like ABA therapy which is effective with children on the spectrum. She would need to be familiar with spectrum kids to know this. But not letting him have his train until after Math sounds like provoking him again. Is she talking to him about the plan and presenting it like a reward? Or is it just like at that moment - guess what? you can't have your train until you do you math? the second one would flip my kid out too - unless it was a plan in place and showing him on a chart what he will earn and when - so he feels it is a rule and he can trust the grown ups won't forgot it!

Like another person posted - everyone knows that kids on the spectrum are oppositional and defiant - some more than others but it's no surprise. I would be telling her - yah, tell me something I don't know.

But to me I would be upset that they keep pulling him out from under the desk and using physical force everytime. No wonder he hates school and doesn't want to do the work. He's been treated this way there for so long that maybe he is used to this negative attention - attention is attention and he's not aware of the difference negative or positive but clearly he needs or wants more attention. How many kids are in the class? Just curious.

Please let us know what happens - my thoughts are with you. Hang in there and don't be afraid to speak up to the school - your son's emotional well being is at stake! : ) I know it's not easy.

help

My son, Bo, is a 7-year-old Aspie in the first grade in Montgomery County Public School in Alabama. He stays in trouble at school. If things don't go his way, he just gets under a table and refuses to do anything they ask of him. He screams if they try to get him out from under the table and if they try to take him out of the classroom they have to take him out kicking and fighting the whole way. The special education director tries to hold him down while he is having his meltdown which makes things worse. I have told them numerous times that he doesn't want to be touched. He is very sound sensitive and touch sensitive. He gets in trouble every day after lunch when it is time to transition to Math. I personally think the lunchroom noise gets him headed for a meltdown each day and then Math sends him right on over the edge. He is very good at all subjects, but doesn't like math at all. He is constantly telling his teacher and the other students to be quiet and pushes anyone if they touch him or crowd his space. This past Thursday the school called me at 11:30 and asked me to come up there. When I arrived, the told me that Bo was arguing with a girl in his class over a seat and would not give in and let her sit there....even though she got to it first. His teacher pulled him off the seat and attempted to carry him to the office and he kicked her all the way there. They told me that they didn't know what to do with Bo and couldn't handle him so I was required to take him home and he could not return to school until Monday when they had a behavior specialist scheduled to come evaluate him.

I called the school on Friday morning and they sent me a copy of the office paper work. Bo was officially suspended and could not return until Monday. Monday is when the behavior specialist was scheduled to evaluate Bo. I went and spent the day at the school waiting on her to arrive. She showed up at 1:00 PM and Bo's class was about to have a Valentines Party. She went and spoke to Bo's teacher in private and then came and questioned me. She had a lady that was with her keep me busy with questions so she could talk to his teacher in private. They decided that Bo needed a break period immediately following lunch since he tends to get in trouble every day just after lunch and when they start working on Math. They also agreed with me that Bo should have assigned seating at lunch because he gets really stressed when he can't sit in his same spot each day. They suggested social stories, first/then rewards, picture schedule.....stuff like that which I have been requesting since the beginning of the year. They also commented that he was seeking attention and wanted the teachers attention at all times so maybe he was seeking negative attention since he wasn't getting enough positive attention to suit him. The plan was to start the breaks today after lunch. Bo didn't even make it to lunch today. His teacher said when it came time for them to work independently that Bo said he needed help. She explained to him how to do things again and he said he still needed help. She told him there was nothing else she could help him with so he got under the table and refused to do his work. His teacher dragged him out from under the table and was taking him to the office and he spit on her. They called my husband, instead of me, and he just told them to leave the boy alone and call me if they needed anything else.......I think they are already tired of dealing with me but oh well there is much more of me to come! I called the school and demanded they tell me what was going on. They just said he had a very rough morning and was going to spent the remainder of the day with the special ed director. When I picked him up this afternoon he told me that all he wanted was for her to help him spell laugh because he didn't know how to. He said she started taking him to the office and he said, OK, I will be good now but she took him anyway. He was taken to the special education room and stayed in there the remainder of today and did no school work. He has a train set that we sent to school this morning for him to play with during his cool down time after lunch so the entire time he was in the special ed room he was trying to break away from the director and get to his train set. He said the special ed director, and "some bossy woman I have never seen before" just wouldn't leave him alone. One of the ladies that evaluated him for behavior strategies is scheduled to go back to his school at 11:30 tomorrow to observe him again, since they didn't get to see a meltdown.I am just at my wits end. I don't know where to go from here. I would appreciate any suggestions. Many Thanks! Lynn

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[Guest guest]



Exactly! : ) well put.

help

My son, Bo, is a 7-year-old Aspie in the first grade in Montgomery County Public School in Alabama. He stays in trouble at school. If things don't go his way, he just gets under a table and refuses to do anything they ask of him. He screams if they try to get him out from under the table and if they try to take him out of the classroom they have to take him out kicking and fighting the whole way. The special education director tries to hold him down while he is having his meltdown which makes things worse. I have told them numerous times that he doesn't want to be touched. He is very sound sensitive and touch sensitive. He gets in trouble every day after lunch when it is time to transition to Math. I personally think the lunchroom noise gets him headed for a meltdown each day and then Math sends him right on over the edge. He is very good at all subjects, but doesn't like math at all. He is constantly telling his teacher and the other students to be quiet and pushes anyone if they touch him or crowd his space. This past Thursday the school called me at 11:30 and asked me to come up there. When I arrived, the told me that Bo was arguing with a girl in his class over a seat and would not give in and let her sit there....even though she got to it first. His teacher pulled him off the seat and attempted to carry him to the office and he kicked her all the way there. They told me that they didn't know what to do with Bo and couldn't handle him so I was required to take him home and he could not return to school until Monday when they had a behavior specialist scheduled to come evaluate him.

I called the school on Friday morning and they sent me a copy of the office paper work. Bo was officially suspended and could not return until Monday. Monday is when the behavior specialist was scheduled to evaluate Bo. I went and spent the day at the school waiting on her to arrive. She showed up at 1:00 PM and Bo's class was about to have a Valentines Party. She went and spoke to Bo's teacher in private and then came and questioned me. She had a lady that was with her keep me busy with questions so she could talk to his teacher in private. They decided that Bo needed a break period immediately following lunch since he tends to get in trouble every day just after lunch and when they start working on Math. They also agreed with me that Bo should have assigned seating at lunch because he gets really stressed when he can't sit in his same spot each day. They suggested social stories, first/then rewards, picture schedule.....stuff like that which I have been requesting since the beginning of the year. They also commented that he was seeking attention and wanted the teachers attention at all times so maybe he was seeking negative attention since he wasn't getting enough positive attention to suit him. The plan was to start the breaks today after lunch. Bo didn't even make it to lunch today. His teacher said when it came time for them to work independently that Bo said he needed help. She explained to him how to do things again and he said he still needed help. She told him there was nothing else she could help him with so he got under the table and refused to do his work. His teacher dragged him out from under the table and was taking him to the office and he spit on her. They called my husband, instead of me, and he just told them to leave the boy alone and call me if they needed anything else.......I think they are already tired of dealing with me but oh well there is much more of me to come! I called the school and demanded they tell me what was going on. They just said he had a very rough morning and was going to spent the remainder of the day with the special ed director. When I picked him up this afternoon he told me that all he wanted was for her to help him spell laugh because he didn't know how to. He said she started taking him to the office and he said, OK, I will be good now but she took him anyway. He was taken to the special education room and stayed in there the remainder of today and did no school work. He has a train set that we sent to school this morning for him to play with during his cool down time after lunch so the entire time he was in the special ed room he was trying to break away from the director and get to his train set. He said the special ed director, and "some bossy woman I have never seen before" just wouldn't leave him alone. One of the ladies that evaluated him for behavior strategies is scheduled to go back to his school at 11:30 tomorrow to observe him again, since they didn't get to see a meltdown.I am just at my wits end. I don't know where to go from here. I would appreciate any suggestions. Many Thanks! Lynn

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[Guest guest]

hi just a thought dont inow if you have done this already, but we took our 8 year old and had proffessional ear plugs made for him yes they are expensive $240 but the noise reduction is amazinG I had a set for me too so I would know what he is feeling and hearing, a hearing diagnostic place will do them. we also have tennis balls on the feet of all tables and chairs in the room, the class has large windows so that florescent lights are not always required, the class has a white board as well, we have 4 on the asd spectrum in gr 4 all boys. good luck this sucks, been there done that, and childrens aid got involved etc and our son is now 19 working at mc donalds and loving it.

On Wed, Feb 16, 2011 at 8:52 PM, Lynn Barlow <wlynnbarlow@...> wrote:

 

All subjects are in the same classroom...but Math is right after lunch time in a very loud lunchroom.  The behavior lady said she didn't see any sensory triggers, that Bo was fine until he didnt have all of the teachers attention.  Bo told me he asked for help and the teacher showed him again and then he tried to do it and she came around and told him it was the wrong answer to try again.....he then went into the meltdown.  He has a lot of anxiety and is very afraid that he is going to do something incorrectly. 

I definitely think they are trying to label him a behavior problem and nothing else.  They are supposedly scheduling a FBA and will notify me when the meeting is scheduled. 

From: Caudle <cindyc@...> Autism and Aspergers Treatment Sent: Wed, February 16, 2011 7:43:39 PM

Subject: Re: help

 



Manipulative and defiant are two of the hallmarks of kids with autism  what on earth did she mean? 

 

If he doesn't like the room during math there probably is a sensory reason  or if it is just math then he needs more support to know how to do the assignments  pulling him out when he misbehaves is a reward for bad behavior  not a good idea

I have never heard of Claritin causing defiant behavior  unless it is wearing off and he is feeling the allergies more

is math just before or after lunch?  perhaps he is hungry or eating something that causes him problems?

our kids need to know what is going to happen in a lot of cases  that is why they like to control the situations  perhaps they need to give him more information  or more control on how he does the work  -do all the odd problems first then the even ones  stuff like that

earn time back in with peers is backwards  pulling him out all day to do this is just wrong  they need a better behavior plan 

and yes request it in writing

Today was another bad day at school for Bo.  He was good through the morning and got to have his train time but then had a meltdown at Math again.  He wanted the teacher to stay with him and when she didn't, he had a meltdown and had to go to the special ed room but did do his math in there.....but not without a fight.  He was spitting and kicking again.  The behavior specialist was there and witnessed his behavior.  She said he is VERY OPPOSITIONAL and DEFIANT...and that she was very surprised to see a child on the spectrum be this manipulative and defiant.  She seemed to be questioning his diagnosis.  She told me to contact his physician and see if maybe the Claritin he has been taking for his allergies is making him unusually defiant.  I hate to tell her but Bo is just being the same Bo that he always is if he doesn't get his way and/or can't control the situation. 

She then proceeded to tell me that tomorrow they are not going to let him have his train time until after Math.....we will see how that goes.  They are hoping the social stories, picture schedule, later train time...and pulling him from the classroom for the remainder of the day if he misbehaves will work.

If that doesn't work then the plan is to pull him from class completely and make him earn time back in his classroom??? 

From: Lynn Barlow <wlynnbarlow@...>Autism and Aspergers Treatment

Sent: Tue, February 15, 2011 6:28:33 PMSubject: help 

My son, Bo, is a 7-year-old Aspie in the first grade in Montgomery County Public School in Alabama.  He stays in trouble at school.  If things don't go his way, he just gets under a table and refuses to do anything they ask of him.  He screams if they try to get him out from under the table and if they try to take him out of the classroom they have to take him out kicking and fighting the whole way.  The special education director tries to hold him down while he is having his meltdown which makes things worse.  I have told them numerous times that he doesn't want to be touched.  He is very sound sensitive and touch sensitive.  He gets in trouble every day after lunch when it is time to transition to Math.  I personally think the lunchroom noise gets him headed for a meltdown each day and then Math sends him right on over the edge.  He is very good at all subjects, but doesn't like math at all.  He is constantly telling his teacher and the other students to be quiet and pushes anyone if they touch him or crowd his space. 

This past Thursday the school called me at 11:30 and asked me to come up there.  When I arrived, the told me that Bo was arguing with a girl in his class over a seat and would not give in and let her sit there....even though she got to it first.  His teacher pulled him off the seat and attempted to carry him to the office and he kicked her all the way there.  They told me that they didn't know what to do with Bo and couldn't handle him so I was required to take him home and he could not return to school until Monday when they had a behavior specialist scheduled to come evaluate him. 

I called the school on Friday morning and they sent me a copy of the office paper work.  Bo was officially suspended and could not return until Monday.  Monday is when the behavior specialist was scheduled to evaluate Bo.  I went and spent the day at the school waiting on her to arrive.  She showed up at 1:00 PM and Bo's class was about to have a Valentines Party.  She went and spoke to Bo's teacher in private and then came and questioned me.  She had a lady that was with her keep me busy with questions so she could talk to his teacher in private.  They decided that Bo needed a break period immediately following lunch since he tends to get in trouble every day just after lunch and when they start working on Math.  They also agreed with me that Bo should have assigned seating at lunch because he gets really stressed when he can't sit in his same spot each day.  They suggested social stories, first/then rewards, picture schedule.....stuff like that which I have been requesting since the beginning of the year.  They also commented that he was seeking attention and wanted the teachers attention at all times so maybe he was seeking negative attention since he wasn't getting enough positive attention to suit him.  The plan was to start the breaks today after lunch. 

Bo didn't even make it to lunch today.  His teacher said when it came time for them to work independently that Bo said he needed help.  She explained to him how to do things again and he said he still needed help.  She told him there was nothing else she could help him with so he got under the table and refused to do his work.  His teacher dragged him out from under the table and was taking him to the office and he spit on her.  They called my husband, instead of me, and he just told them to leave the boy alone and call me if they needed anything else.......I think they are already tired of dealing with me but oh well there is much more of me to come!  I called the school and demanded they tell me what was going on.  They just said he had a very rough morning and was going to spent the remainder of the day with the special ed director. 

When I picked him up this afternoon he told me that all he wanted was for her to help him spell laugh because he didn't know how to.  He said she started taking him to the office and he said, OK, I will be good now but she took him anyway.  He was taken to the special education room and stayed in there the remainder of today and did no school work.  He has a train set that we sent to school this morning for him to play with during his cool down time after lunch so the entire time he was in the special ed room he was trying to break away from the director and get to his train set.  He said the special ed director, and " some bossy woman I have never seen before " just wouldn't leave him alone. 

One of the ladies that evaluated him for behavior strategies is scheduled to go back to his school at 11:30 tomorrow to observe him again, since they didn't get to see a meltdown.I am just at my wits end.  I don't know where to go from here.  I would appreciate any suggestions. 

Many Thanks! Lynn

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[Guest guest]

Lynn, I feel so sorry for Bo (and you). Poor guy! I'm sure you know your son, on and off Claritin, but I wanted to add that I have always had a problem with antihistamines--- Singulair, I think Claritin, and especially nasal sprays like Rhinocort. Even Benadryl can have this effect sometimes. My 3 year old was put on a popular nasal spray for a sinus infection (years ago) and gradually went ballistic. When he started talking about killing his younger sister I took him off and he went back to normal. The standard response from the doctor was always that it could NOT be the medicine--- it always has SO FEW side effects. AS kids can be especially sensitive to medications of any sort (that whole mind / body connection) --- is he on anything else that could be contributing to the

problem?I will be keeping Bo in my prayers. Please let us know what happens.From: SoCalVal <socalval@...>Subject: Re: helpAutism and Aspergers Treatment Date: Wednesday, February 16, 2011, 9:53 PM



Is the behavior specialist experienced with spectrum kids? I would be sort of annoyed that she is acting like a Dr. and suggesting it could be this or that. But I will admit to you, in hopes it can be helpful- when I take Clariton or any allergy meds it makes me sooooo irritable, tired and hungry. I always try to avoid it. I feel like it makes my skin feel weird and I want to claw it off! Recently I found a homeopathic allergy medicine and just so you know, I'm not one that is normally into that sort of thing so I'm not preaching or pushing natural - I just stumbled on it one day and thought I'd give it a try - no side effects I live with it now. It's a brand called Boiron you can look it up on the internet and they have a whole list of different ones but the one I used is for Hayfever - even though its not really specifically hayfever.... Is there a WholeFoods or a small private store that might sell it near you?

Anyway, Im not sure about this but isn't the behavior specialist supposed to focus on positive reinforcement ? Has she set up a REWARD system or does she plan to? Because that is more like ABA therapy which is effective with children on the spectrum. She would need to be familiar with spectrum kids to know this. But not letting him have his train until after Math sounds like provoking him again. Is she talking to him about the plan and presenting it like a reward? Or is it just like at that moment - guess what? you can't have your train until you do you math? the second one would flip my kid out too - unless it was a plan in place and showing him on a chart what he will earn and when - so he feels it is a rule and he can trust the grown ups won't forgot it!

Like another person posted - everyone knows that kids on the spectrum are oppositional and defiant - some more than others but it's no surprise. I would be telling her - yah, tell me something I don't know.

But to me I would be upset that they keep pulling him out from under the desk and using physical force everytime. No wonder he hates school and doesn't want to do the work. He's been treated this way there for so long that maybe he is used to this negative attention - attention is attention and he's not aware of the difference negative or positive but clearly he needs or wants more attention. How many kids are in the class? Just curious.

Please let us know what happens - my thoughts are with you. Hang in there and don't be afraid to speak up to the school - your son's emotional well being is at stake! : ) I know it's not easy.

help

My son, Bo, is a 7-year-old Aspie in the first grade in Montgomery County Public School in Alabama. He stays in trouble at school. If things don't go his way, he just gets under a table and refuses to do anything they ask of him. He screams if they try to get him out from under the table and if they try to take him out of the classroom they have to take him out kicking and fighting the whole way. The special education director tries to hold him down while he is having his meltdown which makes things worse. I have told them numerous times that he doesn't want to be touched. He is very sound sensitive and touch sensitive. He gets in trouble every day after lunch when it is time to transition to Math. I personally think the lunchroom noise gets him headed for a meltdown each day and then Math sends him right on over the edge. He is very good at all subjects, but doesn't like math at all. He is constantly telling his teacher and the other students to be quiet and pushes anyone if they touch him or crowd his space. This past Thursday the school called me at 11:30 and asked me to come up there. When I arrived, the told me that Bo was arguing with a girl in his class over a seat and would not give in and let her sit there....even though she got to it first. His teacher pulled him off the seat and attempted to carry him to the office and he kicked her all the way there. They told me that they didn't know what to do with Bo and couldn't handle him so I was required to take him home and he could not return to school until Monday when they had a behavior specialist scheduled to come evaluate him.

I called the school on Friday morning and they sent me a copy of the office paper work. Bo was officially suspended and could not return until Monday. Monday is when the behavior specialist was scheduled to evaluate Bo. I went and spent the day at the school waiting on her to arrive. She showed up at 1:00 PM and Bo's class was about to have a Valentines Party. She went and spoke to Bo's teacher in private and then came and questioned me. She had a lady that was with her keep me busy with questions so she could talk to his teacher in private. They decided that Bo needed a break period immediately following lunch since he tends to get in trouble every day just after lunch and when they start working on Math. They also agreed with me that Bo should have assigned seating at lunch because he gets really stressed when he can't sit in his same spot each day. They suggested social stories, first/then rewards, picture schedule.....stuff like that which I have been requesting since the beginning of the year. They also commented that he was seeking attention and wanted the teachers attention at all times so maybe he was seeking negative attention since he wasn't getting enough positive attention to suit him. The plan was to start the breaks today after lunch. Bo didn't even make it to lunch today. His teacher said when it came time for them to work independently that Bo said he needed help. She explained to him how to do things again and he said he still needed help. She told him there was nothing else she could help him with so he got under the table and refused to do his work. His teacher dragged him out from under the table and was taking him to the office and he spit on her. They called my husband, instead of me, and he just told them to leave the boy alone and call me if they needed anything else.......I think they are already tired of dealing with me but oh well there is much more of me to come! I called the school and demanded they tell me what was going on. They just said he had a very rough morning and was going to spent the remainder of the day with the special ed director. When I picked him up this afternoon he told me that all he wanted was for her to help him spell laugh because he didn't know how to. He said she started taking him to the office and he said, OK, I will be good now but she took him anyway. He was taken to the special education room and stayed in there the remainder of today and did no school work. He has a train set that we sent to school this morning for him to play with during his cool down time after lunch so the entire time he was in the special ed room he was trying to break away from the director and get to his train set. He said the special ed director, and "some bossy woman I have never seen before" just wouldn't leave him alone. One of the ladies that evaluated him for behavior strategies is scheduled to go back to his school at 11:30 tomorrow to observe him again, since they didn't get to see a meltdown.I am just at my wits end. I don't know where to go from here. I would appreciate any suggestions. Many Thanks! Lynn

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[Guest guest]

I would check to see if there is an advocate that can help you with the school issues. The main thing the behaviorist should be looking into is what Bo is trying to say with his behaviors. Is it that he does not like math or is it that he likes the one-on-one attention. It sounded like he wanted the teacher to stay with him and when she didn't that is when he had a meltdown. Before you can really look into interventions you have to see what Bo is trying to communicate with his behaivor. Behavior is communication and children on the spectrum have a hard time communicating and that is why we have behaivors. Is the medication new or has he been on it a while? Usually if it is a medcation issues it will be in all areas throughout the time the medicaiton is in his system not selective time. Have the school done an behavior tracking sheet to determine when and

what the behaviors are communicating?

[Guest guest]

You don't have to pay for the info, they send you a whole packet

that will get you started.  We also found a LOT of info online.  If

you are ambitious, and really care for your son, which I can tell

you do, it's there.  I'll ask hubby where specifically if you're

interested.

We have not gotten to the training yet, we started fundraising, and

my lovely family (mother & sibs) decided to tell all the

neighbors that we were trashing THEM (my mom).  They put the kybosh

on it, didn't ask people to come to our fundraiser, and in fact told

them to stay away.  Yes, I love my family... not.

But all the info you need is online. Free.

If you want to go to a training, they will help with a scholarship,

and will help you figure out how to have childcare for your son. 

They are very supportive, they are not high pressure sales people,

they know you have enough pressure in your life as it is.  They will

help you find a solution that works for you.

Again, I can't recommend this highly enough.  Our oldest had a

seizure in late June.  We literally had to watch him 24/7.  If we

needed to go to the bathroom, or cook lunch, we couldn't turn our

back that long.  He'd dash out the door and down the highway.  We

ended up putting a locking hasp on the front door, and using a key

to let ourselves out with.

We then found Son-Rise, and started working with both him and his

brother.  By the time school started in Sept, you couldn't tell he'd

even had a seizure, and in fact his teacher said that not only were

they AS good as when school had gotten out, but they were BETTER. 

She raved on and on and on about both boys. 

The person who runs the institute now was it's first patient.  He

was evaluated at like 4yrs, and was pronounced severely autistic and

retarded and the parents were told to institutionalize him and focus

on their other children.  Thank heavens they didn't!  They've helped

over 20,000 individuals come out of autism.  I wouldn't use anything

else on my kids.

On 2/16/2011 7:11 AM, Kirkland Clan wrote:

 

This is a terrific opportunity however the financial

strain it will create for your family is enormous, sunrise

seems great, however whom do you leave your asd kiddo with

for the week+ duration you are there training? It isnt an

option to invite the teachers to attend as they will

refuse unfortunately, if all educators in our school could

attend a two week session at sunrise none I mean none of

our kids at school would be in this huge circle of

conflict and anxiety the children would be well

understood.

Kirkland's burg Ontario CANADA

On Tue, Feb 15, 2011 at 8:01 PM,

Reszetylo <sparklesperson@...>

wrote:

 

Please, please talk to the people at http://AutismTreatment.com

- this worked wonders with my boys.  They have

info they will send you, there is TONS of info

online - And it WILL help your son. 

And you can write me privately if you wish.

On 2/15/2011 6:28 PM, Lynn Barlow wrote:

 

My son, Bo, is a 7-year-old

Aspie in the first grade in

Montgomery County Public School in

Alabama.  He stays in trouble at

school.  If things don't go his

way, he just gets under a table

and refuses to do anything they

ask of him.  He screams if they

try to get him out from under the

table and if they try to take him

out of the classroom they have to

take him out kicking and fighting

the whole way.  The special

education director tries to hold

him down while he is having his

meltdown which makes things

worse.  I have told them numerous

times that he doesn't want to be

touched.  He is very sound

sensitive and touch sensitive.  He

gets in trouble every day after

lunch when it is time to

transition to Math.  I personally

think the lunchroom noise gets him

headed for a meltdown each day and

then Math sends him right on over

the edge.  He is very good at all

subjects, but doesn't like math at

all.  He is constantly telling his

teacher and the other students to

be quiet and pushes anyone if they

touch him or crowd his space. 

This past Thursday the school

called me at 11:30 and asked me to

come up there.  When I arrived,

the told me that Bo was arguing

with a girl in his class over a

seat and would not give in and let

her sit there....even though she

got to it first.  His teacher

pulled him off the seat and

attempted to carry him to the

office and he kicked her all the

way there.  They told me that they

didn't know what to do with Bo and

couldn't handle him so I was

required to take him home and he

could not return to school until

Monday when they had a behavior

specialist scheduled to come

evaluate him. 

I called the

school on Friday

morning and

they sent me a copy of the

office paper work.  Bo was

officially suspended and could

not return until Monday.  Monday

is when the behavior specialist

was scheduled to evaluate Bo.  I

went and spent the day at the

school waiting on her to

arrive.  She showed up at 1:00

PM and Bo's class was about to

have a Valentines Party.  She

went and spoke to Bo's teacher

in private and then came and

questioned me.  She had a lady

that was with her keep me busy

with questions so she could talk

to his teacher in private.  They

decided that Bo needed a break

period immediately following

lunch since he tends to get in

trouble every day just after

lunch and when they start

working on Math.  They also

agreed with me that Bo should

have assigned seating at lunch

because he gets really stressed

when he can't sit in his same

spot each day.  They suggested

social stories, first/then

rewards, picture

schedule.....stuff like that

which I have been requesting

since the beginning of the

year.  They also commented that

he was seeking attention and

wanted the teachers attention at

all times so maybe he was

seeking negative attention since

he wasn't getting enough

positive attention to suit him. 

The plan was to start the breaks

today after lunch. 

Bo didn't even make it to lunch

today.  His teacher said when it

came time for them to work

independently that Bo said he

needed help.  She explained to him

how to do things again and he said

he still needed help.  She told

him there was nothing else she

could help him with so he got

under the table and refused to do

his work.  His teacher dragged him

out from under the table and was

taking him to the office and he

spit on her.  They called my

husband, instead of me, and he

just told them to leave the boy

alone and call me if they needed

anything else.......I think they

are already tired of dealing with

me but oh well there is much more

of me to come!  I called the

school and demanded they tell me

what was going on.  They just said

he had a very rough morning and

was going to spent the remainder

of the day with the special ed

director. 

When I picked him up this

afternoon he told me that all he

wanted was for her to help him

spell laugh because he didn't know

how to.  He said she started

taking him to the office and he

said, OK, I will be good now but

she took him anyway.  He was taken

to the special education room and

stayed in there the remainder of

today and did no school work.  He

has a train set that we sent to

school this morning for him to

play with during his cool down

time after lunch so the entire

time he was in the special

ed room he was trying to

break away from the director and

get to his train set.  He said the

special ed director,

and "some bossy woman I have never

seen before" just wouldn't leave

him alone. 

One of the ladies that evaluated

him for behavior strategies is

scheduled to go back to his school

at 11:30 tomorrow to observe him

again, since they didn't get to

see a meltdown.

I am just at my wits end.  I don't

know where to go from here.  I

would appreciate any suggestions. 

Many Thanks!

Lynn

[Guest guest]

Hi, just saw that b it about Claritin making kids agitated. From what I

understand it isn't the antihistamine in it but is the kind with

decongestant in it. On the box you will see a capital " D " this stands

for decongestant, so don't buy those ones, they have them with ONLY the

antihistamine.

I found out a bit about Decongestant, which is an actual drug from

another group I used to write to with a pharmacology professor in it. He

said he wonders why Decongestant isn't pulled from the market altogether

because it is so dangerous and causes many deaths a year from heart

attacks in people with high blood pressure.

I used to give it to my son Marty many years ago in the spring for

allergies, I had no idea that the " D " in regular allergy meds was this

bad. Well one day we went on a picnic and my son was very agitated and

defiant, never used that word till I saw it here, but yep that described

him. His school always called that behavior " noncompliant " but terms

changed. Anyway that day my daughter asked me if I had ever read the

small print on the allergy meds box that said the Decongestant could

make some people very agitated.

Duh! I had not so stopped giving it to him. I don't take it either

because I tend to have high blood pressure. We do however take the usual

allergy medications with only the antihistamines in them. I would be

sunk without them! If a person is agitated from just the antihistamine

that is another story, and of course is possible too, but usually is the

Decongestant causing the agitation I think from the little I know.

Carolyn ;o) OR

Lynn Barlow wrote:

>

> Today was another bad day at school for Bo. He was good through the

> morning and got to have his train time but then had a meltdown at Math

> again. He wanted the teacher to stay with him and when she didn't, he

> had a meltdown and had to go to the special ed room but did do his

> math in there.....but not without a fight. He was spitting and

> kicking again. The behavior specialist was there and witnessed his

> behavior. She said he is VERY OPPOSITIONAL and DEFIANT...and that she

> was very surprised to see a child on the spectrum be this manipulative

> and defiant. She seemed to be questioning his diagnosis. She told me

> to contact his physician and see if maybe the Claritin he has been

> taking for his allergies is making him unusually defiant. I hate to

> tell her but Bo is just being the same Bo that he always is if he

> doesn't get his way and/or can't control the situation.

>

> She then proceeded to tell me that tomorrow they are not going to let

> him have his train time until after Math.....we will see how that

> goes. They are hoping the social stories, picture schedule, later

> train time...and pulling him from the classroom for the remainder of

> the day if he misbehaves will work.

>

> If that doesn't work then the plan is to pull him from class

> completely and make him earn time back in his classroom???

>

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> **

>

>

[Guest guest]

Wanted to say also I do not like the words " defiant " and " oppositional "

who came up with them? I think more neutral words would be better as to

help protect the teacher from getting defiant and oppositional herself,

or himself!!

Not good emotions in a classroom, the less drama the better. People with

" peace " and " love " and " patience " within them would be much more of a

help I would think, qualities I have spent my life perfecting within me..!

Carolyn

Carolyn wrote:

>

>

> Hi, just saw that b it about Claritin making kids agitated. From what I

> understand it isn't the antihistamine in it but is the kind with

> decongestant in it. On the box you will see a capital " D " this stands

> for decongestant, so don't buy those ones, they have them with ONLY the

> antihistamine.

>

> I found out a bit about Decongestant, which is an actual drug from

> another group I used to write to with a pharmacology professor in it. He

> said he wonders why Decongestant isn't pulled from the market altogether

> because it is so dangerous and causes many deaths a year from heart

> attacks in people with high blood pressure.

>

> I used to give it to my son Marty many years ago in the spring for

> allergies, I had no idea that the " D " in regular allergy meds was this

> bad. Well one day we went on a picnic and my son was very agitated and

> defiant, never used that word till I saw it here, but yep that described

> him. His school always called that behavior " noncompliant " but terms

> changed. Anyway that day my daughter asked me if I had ever read the

> small print on the allergy meds box that said the Decongestant could

> make some people very agitated.

>

> Duh! I had not so stopped giving it to him. I don't take it either

> because I tend to have high blood pressure. We do however take the usual

> allergy medications with only the antihistamines in them. I would be

> sunk without them! If a person is agitated from just the antihistamine

> that is another story, and of course is possible too, but usually is the

> Decongestant causing the agitation I think from the little I know.

>

> Carolyn ;o) OR

>

> Lynn Barlow wrote:

> >

> > Today was another bad day at school for Bo. He was good through the

> > morning and got to have his train time but then had a meltdown at Math

> > again. He wanted the teacher to stay with him and when she didn't, he

> > had a meltdown and had to go to the special ed room but did do his

> > math in there.....but not without a fight. He was spitting and

> > kicking again. The behavior specialist was there and witnessed his

> > behavior. She said he is VERY OPPOSITIONAL and DEFIANT...and that she

> > was very surprised to see a child on the spectrum be this manipulative

> > and defiant. She seemed to be questioning his diagnosis. She told me

> > to contact his physician and see if maybe the Claritin he has been

> > taking for his allergies is making him unusually defiant. I hate to

> > tell her but Bo is just being the same Bo that he always is if he

> > doesn't get his way and/or can't control the situation.

> >

> > She then proceeded to tell me that tomorrow they are not going to let

> > him have his train time until after Math.....we will see how that

> > goes. They are hoping the social stories, picture schedule, later

> > train time...and pulling him from the classroom for the remainder of

> > the day if he misbehaves will work.

> >

> > If that doesn't work then the plan is to pull him from class

> > completely and make him earn time back in his classroom???

> >

> > ----------------------------------------------------------

> > **

> >

> >

>

>

[Guest guest]

I don't like the word " manipulative " either, these words are quite

unfriendly and unaccepting towards the child. No wonder a child reacts

to such words, they are insulting and emotionally abusive words I think

and should not be used. I am sure we would not want our behavior

described in such negative terms, if so we would become defensive and

who knows what, not good things.

Carolyn

Carolyn wrote:

>

>

> Wanted to say also I do not like the words " defiant " and " oppositional "

> who came up with them? I think more neutral words would be better as to

> help protect the teacher from getting defiant and oppositional herself,

> or himself!!

>

> Not good emotions in a classroom, the less drama the better. People with

> " peace " and " love " and " patience " within them would be much more of a

> help I would think, qualities I have spent my life perfecting within me..!

>

> Carolyn

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

So, when a child is being manipulative - and whether children or

adults, we all are at times -  how would you describe it in a more

neutral way?

On 18/02/2011 1:04 PM, Carolyn wrote:

 

I don't like the word "manipulative" either, these words

are quite

unfriendly and unaccepting towards the child. No wonder a

child reacts

to such words, they are insulting and emotionally abusive

words I think

and should not be used. I am sure we would not want our

behavior

described in such negative terms, if so we would become

defensive and

who knows what, not good things.

Carolyn

Carolyn wrote:

>

>

> Wanted to say also I do not like the words "defiant"

and "oppositional"

> who came up with them? I think more neutral words

would be better as to

> help protect the teacher from getting defiant and

oppositional herself,

> or himself!!

>

> Not good emotions in a classroom, the less drama the

better. People with

> "peace" and "love" and "patience" within them would

be much more of a

> help I would think, qualities I have spent my life

perfecting within me..!

>

> Carolyn

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi , I don't know but manipulative to me has a negative

connotation, and you are right we all do it. I wish there were a better

term, normal maybe? I mean it seems to me that we are born with needs

and we then we work to get our needs met. With a baby he or she cries.

Then as the child gets older they use other ways to get their needs met.

I would say the person who's responsibility it is to meet these needs

needs to use love, understanding, and patience towards the child, and

not say the child is being manipulative suggesting there is something

wrong with him or her for having needs and wanting them met.

This can move into adulthood too with some parents. They treat the child

like there is something wrong with them for having normal needs and pins

a negative term on them. This can lead to a lifetime of hurt in the

child when there never was anything wrong with him or her in the first

place, but it was a wrong perspective coming from the parent.

Am going through this in my own life, think things would have been

better if I'd been treated as a blessing rather than a burden. Too many

negative words and not enough positive ones used by my parents,

primarily my mom who still does it to this day!

Something to consider. I conquered my son's terrible behaviors, and they

were really bad, with love and patience, insisting he was a good boy

when they schools told him he was bad. Finally I convinced him and he

settled down, its been like a miracle really. Kids pretty much believe

they are what their parents tell them they are.

Carolyn ;o)

Riley wrote:

>

>

> So, when a child is being manipulative - and whether children or

> adults, we all are at times - how would you describe it in a more

> neutral way?

>

>

>

> On 18/02/2011 1:04 PM, Carolyn wrote:

>

>>

>>

>> I don't like the word " manipulative " either, these words are quite

>> unfriendly and unaccepting towards the child. No wonder a child reacts

>> to such words, they are insulting and emotionally abusive words I think

>> and should not be used. I am sure we would not want our behavior

>> described in such negative terms, if so we would become defensive and

>> who knows what, not good things.

>>

>> Carolyn

>>

>> Carolyn wrote:

>> >

>> >

>> > Wanted to say also I do not like the words " defiant " and " oppositional "

>> > who came up with them? I think more neutral words would be better as to

>> > help protect the teacher from getting defiant and oppositional herself,

>> > or himself!!

>> >

>> > Not good emotions in a classroom, the less drama the better. People

>> with

>> > " peace " and " love " and " patience " within them would be much more of a

>> > help I would think, qualities I have spent my life perfecting

>> within me..!

>> >

>> > Carolyn

>> >

>> >

>> >

>> >

>>

>

[Guest guest]

Here's what thesaurus.com says: There are worse words. Now Machiavellian would be an acknowledgement of intelligence.

Carolyn, sometimes You gotta call a spade a spade. And it's a rare kid that isn't skilled in the art of manipulation. Starts with yelling for the breast or bottle.

I think only the children (maybe) who are brought up, with I think it is called attachment parenting in the civilized world, with incredible attentiveness that some less 'civilized' tribes practice, where manipulation isn't early learned. The mothers carry the babies all the time, no diapers; the mothers are so attuned that they know when the child has to go.

We don't have a society where the raising of children is the primary objective; manipulation is one of the results. And the need for control that seems strong in autism exacerbates an already-existing problem that we rarely notice until it becomes extreme.

Francine

Main Entry:

calculating

Part of Speech:

adjective

Definition:

scheming to manipulate

Synonyms:

Machiavellian

calculating

Part of Speech:

adjective

Definition:

scheming to manipulate

Synonyms:

Machiavellian, artful, canny, careful, cautious, chary, circumspect, considerate, contriving, crafty, cunning, designing, devious, discreet, gingerly, guarded, guileful, intelligent, manipulative , politic, premeditating, safe, scheming, sharp, shrewd, sly, wary, wily

Antonyms:

artless, naive, unassuming, uncalculating

Speak with Him Thou for He hearest.

Spirit with Spirit can speak.

Closer is Love than breathing,

Nearer than hands and feet.

(with appreciation for Tennyson)

Re: help

So, when a child is being manipulative - and whether children or adults, we all are at times - how would you describe it in a more neutral way?

On 18/02/2011 1:04 PM, Carolyn wrote:

I don't like the word "manipulative" either, these words are quite

unfriendly and unaccepting towards the child. No wonder a child reacts

to such words, they are insulting and emotionally abusive words I think

and should not be used. I am sure we would not want our behavior

described in such negative terms, if so we would become defensive and

who knows what, not good things.

Carolyn

Carolyn wrote:

>

>

> Wanted to say also I do not like the words "defiant" and "oppositional"

> who came up with them? I think more neutral words would be better as to

> help protect the teacher from getting defiant and oppositional herself,

> or himself!!

>

> Not good emotions in a classroom, the less drama the better. People with

> "peace" and "love" and "patience" within them would be much more of a

> help I would think, qualities I have spent my life perfecting within me..!

>

> Carolyn

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Francine, you might have seen my response to and my point was I

think that it is very important that we parents don't give our kids

negative labels that will be impossible for them to ever overcome. It

puts them at a deficit so that they think something is wrong with them.

If you call a child manipulative then he thinks something is wrong with

him, it is not a positive compliment but is pointing out a fault in him.

And it is the type of thing that a child cannot overcome but will always

have, like when will a child be less manipulative, he will never know

how to overcome it and get you to love him.

I would rather just not do it in the first place because I do not see

any good that it does. My son Marty was in a system like this,from the

beginning they wanted to lock him up in an institution. Everything about

him was looked by the professionals as negative. Poor kid began school

and they always labeled him and talked in his presence about how he

could not learn anything, etc. always suggesting he was a negative

handful with their choices of words and labels. Oh yes once in awhile he

would meet a positive teacher that did her or his best to motivate him

but the negative damage had already been done I think, and he never

really tried to do well at school and was finally kicked out altogether.

I knew something was wrong with the system but didn't know exactly what

it was at first, and stumbled across it gradually myself and just want

to share what I have learned to help others. I just loved him

unconditionally, told him I loved him, told him he was a good boy and I

would never ever leave him for any reason over and over again, and boy

did he ever test me. He wrecked my house and attacked me on a daily

basis for many years but I never gave up and finally I guess he must

have just believed me and he settled down.

I was reading a website earlier a person sent about a program called

SonRise or something like that, and realized that was the very approach

I had used with my son and it worked with him too. All that positive

reinforcement worked once it was all he received. From me.

Just my thoughts and experiences.

Carolyn OR ;0)

sunrose101@... wrote:

>

>

> Here's what thesaurus.com says: There are worse words. Now

> Machiavellian would be an acknowledgement of intelligence.

>

> Carolyn, sometimes You gotta call a spade a spade. And it's a rare

> kid that isn't skilled in the art of manipulation. Starts with

> yelling for the breast or bottle.

>

> I think only the children (maybe) who are brought up, with I think it

> is called attachment parenting in the civilized world, with incredible

> attentiveness that some less 'civilized' tribes practice, where

> manipulation isn't early learned. The mothers carry the babies all

> the time, no diapers; the mothers are so attuned that they know when

> the child has to go.

>

> We don't have a society where the raising of children is the primary

> objective; manipulation is one of the results. And the need for

> control that seems strong in autism exacerbates an already-existing

> problem that we rarely notice _until_ it becomes extreme.

>

> Francine

>

>

> Main Entry: calculating

> <http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/calculating>

> Part of Speech: /adjective /

> Definition: scheming to manipulate

> Synonyms:

> Machiavellian

>

> calculating <http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/calculating>

> Part of Speech: /adjective /

> Definition: scheming to manipulate

> Synonyms: Machiavellian, artful <http://thesaurus.com/browse/artful>,

> canny <http://thesaurus.com/browse/canny>, careful

> <http://thesaurus.com/browse/careful>, cautious

> <http://thesaurus.com/browse/cautious>, chary, circumspect

> <http://thesaurus.com/browse/circumspect>, considerate

> <http://thesaurus.com/browse/considerate>, contriving, crafty

> <http://thesaurus.com/browse/crafty>, cunning

> <http://thesaurus.com/browse/cunning>, designing, devious

> <http://thesaurus.com/browse/devious>, discreet

> <http://thesaurus.com/browse/discreet>, gingerly

> <http://thesaurus.com/browse/gingerly>, guarded

> <http://thesaurus.com/browse/guarded>, guileful, intelligent

> <http://thesaurus.com/browse/intelligent>, *manipulative *, politic,

> premeditating, safe <http://thesaurus.com/browse/safe>, scheming,

> sharp <http://thesaurus.com/browse/sharp>, shrewd

> <http://thesaurus.com/browse/shrewd>, sly

> <http://thesaurus.com/browse/sly>, wary

> <http://thesaurus.com/browse/wary>, wily

> <http://thesaurus.com/browse/wily>

> Antonyms: artless, naive <http://thesaurus.com/browse/naive>,

> unassuming <http://thesaurus.com/browse/unassuming>, uncalculating

>

>

> Speak with Him Thou for He hearest.

> Spirit with Spirit can speak.

> Closer is Love than breathing,

> Nearer than hands and feet.

>

> (with appreciation for Tennyson)

>

> Re: help

>

>

> So, when a child is being manipulative - and whether children or

> adults, we all are at times - how would you describe it in a more

> neutral way?

>

>

>

> On 18/02/2011 1:04 PM, Carolyn wrote:

>>

>> I don't like the word " manipulative " either, these words are quite

>> unfriendly and unaccepting towards the child. No wonder a child reacts

>> to such words, they are insulting and emotionally abusive words I think

>> and should not be used. I am sure we would not want our behavior

>> described in such negative terms, if so we would become defensive and

>> who knows what, not good things.

>>

>> Carolyn

>>

>> Carolyn wrote:

>> >

>> >

>> > Wanted to say also I do not like the words " defiant " and " oppositional "

>> > who came up with them? I think more neutral words would be better as to

>> > help protect the teacher from getting defiant and oppositional herself,

>> > or himself!!

>> >

>> > Not good emotions in a classroom, the less drama the better. People

>> with

>> > " peace " and " love " and " patience " within them would be much more of a

>> > help I would think, qualities I have spent my life perfecting

>> within me..!

>> >

>> > Carolyn

>> >

>> >

>> >

>> >

>

[Guest guest]

D1 (sound and fissure lesion in the half of the outer enamel), D2 (enamel decay) and D3 (dentin decay) From: pallavi <pallaviparalikar@...> Sent: Tue, March 29, 2011 10:10:39

PMSubject: Help

Just some random questions i came across in papers

any help appreciated.

What are D1 D2 D3 lesions?

Indemnity organization functions..

Most suitable material for archwire?

Who is responsible if Dentist is sanctioned?

Thank you