Re: Homeschooling ASpie kids

June 20, 2007

Roxanna,

How true are your words!!! My son was evaluated by an OT and they found

his handwriting perfectly fine... but provided him with an Alpha Smart

to use in the Classroom!! Directly from my Son's OT evaluation by the

SCHOOl OT:

" demonstrated the ability to correctly form ALL leters although

formation decreased when writing speed increased. Teacher reported

that what wrote during evaluation was much better than what he

typically writes in class. Review of classroom worked showed that

legibility of 's writing decreased when he was asked to write

sentences or when there were time limits on completion of work "

Recommendations:

" demonstrates the fine motor skills needed for handwriting but

handwriting samples from his class show decreased legibility. It has

been recommended that have the opportunity to try learning

keyboarding. It has been determined that will be provided an

Alpha Smart for completing CLASSROOM assignments. NO FURTHER OT

SERVICES ARE RECOMMENDED AT THIS TIME! "

This eval also found out that he used a " functional quadruped grasp " ...

but when I watch him he holds his pencil in an odd grip and up to

high!! He will correct it temporarily when I point it out to him!

I'm off to read the article! I may have some new " candy " to pass out

too!!

Jackie

On Jun 20, 2007, at 8:45 AM, Roxanna wrote:

> The OT is wrong. A lot of these kids can write when they " focus " and

> " take their time " but that is a short term happening. It is also true

> for everyone else, lol. I mean, compare how you write your name when

> you have plenty of time vs when you are signing a check in the grocery

> with kids screaming and a long line of tired looking people behind

> you. So that excuse doesn't even hold water.

>

> These kids can often have a problem with stamina - the ability to keep

> it up for a long enough period of time to complete writing tasks.

> Also, if the child has been writing a lot that day, then when asked to

> write a paper, they won't do as well as when they haven't been writing

> all day. This produces that wonderful inconsistency so that the

> teachers/therapists can say, " He could do it if he wanted to - look he

> did just great yesterday. " A good OT would work on improving

> finger/hand strength to increase the amount of time they can handle

> writing.

>

> A good article discussing how this might work in kids with autism is

> titled, " Balancing the Tray. " I love this article and hand it out to

> people like candy at school. <g>

> http://www.assew.org/articles/balancing_the_tray.htm It doesn't

> pertain to handwriting but it does discuss the concept of how these

> kids have only so much available before they are out.

>

> Roxanna

> Autism Happens

>> Re: ( ) Homeschooling ASpie kids

>>

>> and Robin,

>>

>> THese are both EXCELLENT suggestions! I have never thought about it

>> being a " right " to do extra work.... BUT is I take the time to look

>> at from an aspie's point of view... I can see exactly why he would be

>> so ticked off! The " extra " work doesn't effect my NT child!! LOL

>>

>> I'm not sure that I like the alpha smart either... because you can't

>> see if he is spelling the words correctly or using the correct

>> grammar, etc... until it's printed out. I know when he does homework

>> at home recently.. I let him use the computer and he types it out and

>> then we talk about what's incorrect. He grumbles that he has to do it

>> over, but it's easier for him on the computer.

>>

>> I don't think he has any other issues with the handwriting except for

>> the grip issue. The school OT blamed his inability to focus on the

>> " real " reason he couldnt' write neatly. SHe said he could do it if he

>> took his time! I KNOW he can... but a simple list of spelling words

>> that would take my 7 year 10 minutes to write neatly... could take

>> him more than an hour. He obvious struggles to form each letter the

>> right way and you can look at him and tell he is visibly frustrated.

>> I will try the pencil idea... we go through a lot of pencils anyway

>> because my son likes to bite the eraser and we " think " eat them! I

>> haven't actually caught him swallowing them... but we NEVER find the

>> end of the eraser anywhere! SO unless he has a collection stashed

>> somewhere, then he is eating them.

>>

>> Jackie

>> On Jun 19, 2007, at 7:35 AM, and/or Robin Lemke wrote:

>>

>>> Hi.

>>> My son was given the " right " to do extra work AFTER HIS GRADE-LEVEL

>>> work was done, too. He got so bored and mad that he had to do

>>> double the work. At first, we were all trying to figure out why he

>>> was getting so mad (and why he would simply shut down and suddenly

>>> wouldn't do either work),,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,then it " dawned " on me and

>>> we chatted with the teacher.

>>> What they decided was that if he coud do the end-of-chapter

>>> " review " .............(usually 1sheet/2sheets),,,,,then he would

>>> simply do " his level " when everyone else did " their level " .

>>> ------------------------------

>>>

>>> He's always had a rough time with writing as well. He presses so

>>> hard that sometimes the sheets would rip.

>>> He received OT and was told he could do anything that required

>>> writing, on a computer.

>>> They did let him have an Alpha Smart at school,,,,,,but it seemed

>>> too hard to actually quickly SEE what he was doing.

>>> Sometimes, the room " helper " would write what he said for him. I

>>> did this at home for him, too.

>>> They weren't saying that he didn't have to learn how to

>>> write,,,,,,,,,,,he did have to....and they worked on his sensory

>>> issues with the pressure,,,,,,but they also acknowledged that it was

>>> rough for him.

>>> (One of my things to try to get him to be aware of his " grip and

>>> pressure " was to always find new and cool pencils. This thrilled

>>> him..........probably too much, though,,,,,,,,cause he would be

>>> mesmerized if there was a new feel/design........hee hee.

>>> Sigh.

>>> Oh - and I'm no expert,,,,,,,,,,,but,,,,,,,,,since he's basically

>>> doing double the work(at home?),,,,,,,,,could you have him do " his

>>> level " work and if things are going good once that's done, perhaps

>>> have him try the " boring " stuff? That way, if he doesn't do it

>>> both, at least he's proven that he grasps where his level is at.

>>> ???? Then, explain to the teacher (if it didn't all get done) that

>>> it just isn't fair for him to have double). Explain that " gifted "

>>> doesn't mean " want more work " ,,,,,,,,,,,

>>> I just remember the boredom and anger my son had with the " boring "

>>> work. Makes me sad for him when I think about how long he had to do

>>> both.

>>> Good luck.

>>> Robin

>>>

>>> <hunebear3@...> wrote:

>>>> ,

>>>>

>>>> Yes.. the school makes him do rewrites... I'm guilty of it myself

>>>> BEFORE I knew of the AS! I'm going to ask for a dysgraphia

>>>> evaluation!

>>>> We'll see out that goes. likes his gifted class, but I'm

>>>> sure

>>>> he would love to go even further! He's in the 4th grade but

>>>> functions

>>>> academically on a 6-7 grade level. So there's only so much he can do

>>>> in the public school system. I also feel that he is being " punished "

>>>> because he can not have enrichment work until he completes the

>>>> current

>>>> grade work. He feels this is a waste of his time and gets days

>>>> behind

>>>> and loses recess(which he could really care less about)or the send

>>>> him

>>>> to the library... which he LOVES! He usually gets good grades but

>>>> HATES all of the homework that he has to do. It's such a battle to

>>>> get

>>>> him to do the homework. Sometimes I physically have to hold him at

>>>> the

>>>> table... which I hate to do!

>>>>

>>>> As for hating writing... he has always disliked. He has a bad pencil

>>>> grip and I was told by the school OT that it was too late to change

>>>> it.

>>>> I have been trying to get this corrected since first grade... bad

>>>> experience there!

>>>>

>>>> I'm learning so much for you guys! Glad that I found this group.

>>>>

>>>> Jackie

>>>> On Jun 18, 2007, at 2:32 PM, LJL wrote:

>>>>

>>>> > Everybody uses something different. My second son (not diagnosed

>>>> on

>>>> > the spectrum) was evaluated as gifted. It's nice to allow him to

>>>> go

>>>> > as far forward as he needs. His 'gifted' class was doing nothing

>>>> for

>>>> > him academically.

>>>> >

>>>> > Even if you stay in the school, I would ask that the school stop

>>>> > making him do so many rewrites - which is my 'guess' as to why

>>>> your

>>>> > son hates to write so much.

>>>> >

June 20, 2007

Kaye,

I really appreciate this information and I'm planning on checking on

exactly what is required for my state. Do you have a recommendation on

where I should start looking? Maybe the school is using the NCLB act

as an excuse? I know I was told by someone in the school system that

skipping grades was not allowed and that they could only let a child go

so far ahead or the next year's teacher wouldn't have anything to

teach. I didn't like the fact that I felt that they were trying to

dumb my kids down! There's NO WAY that I would even suggest my AS son

skipping a grade because of the social issues... but my NT gifted

daughter would do just fine academically and socially if she were

allowed to skip!

I know within my children's school system they do break the kids up

within the classroom on certain subjects based on what the skill level

of the child is! SOmetimes my children are the only ones in their

group... but they are still not getting the level of work that they are

capable of doing. I have got a lot of information to process before

school starts this fall!

Jackie

On Jun 20, 2007, at 12:49 AM, Kaye Bates wrote:

> lol scuse me but your kid's teacher is FULL OF IT.

> No Child Left Behind applies to me too since it is

> national, so I know something about that! If your

> child comes to school on the first day, the teacher

> assesses him/her on the standards for your state, for

> whatever they must be " proficient " in by the end of

> the year...Let's say your kid tests " proficient " on

> the first day. There is NO requirement they do work

> on which they are already proficient! Any teacher

> that had that situation would then

> say...hmmm...obviously this kid needs to MOVE ON. And

> they would design work that went after whatever

> standards the child is not yet proficient in (even if

> it was the next higher grade level standards). NCLB

> can allow some teachers to just get lazy (no excuse

> for this!) But their job is to get their whole class

> proficient on whatever grade level standards. If they

> are lazy, that's all they care about. If they are

> TEACHERS, they take their students from whatever point

> they are starting from and move them ahead. As far as

> their potential and abilities will let them travel in

> a year. Your kid's teacher is LAZY. UGH. There are

> no two kids the same, they are all over the map

> (especially in general ed classes, not just special

> ed). Any competent teacher already knows this and

> does not just do ONE THING. A good teacher meets the

> needs of all students. (And that means, teaching in

> multiple ways of learning styles and intelligences).

>

> Kaye

> --- <hunebear3@...> wrote:

>

>> I was told by my NT daughter's 2nd grade teacher

>> that by Law (No child

>> left behind act) that all children whether they were

>> gifted or not had

>> to complete all current grade level work. So both

>> of my children... my

>> typical daughter and my AS son both had to do their

>> current grade level

>> before getting enrichment. They are both given PRE

>> tests for spelling

>> and given an alternative spelling list. They are

>> supposed to do this

>> with Math but I have not seen any evidence that my

>> son or daughter for

>> that matter gets a different math assignment. I

>> know they receive

>> enrichment ON TOP of their regular work. It's

>> difficult for me as a

>> parent no matter which of my children it involves to

>> realize that they

>> have to " dumb " themselves down and complete work

>> that their peers are

>> doing.

>>

>> Another think I just " love " (sarcasm here) is how

>> excited the teachers

>> get for my children to come to school during TCAP

>> testing. One of my

>> son's teachers actually told me that they needed his

>> scores to benefit

>> the class!! SO my smart children are used to make

>> the overall test

>> scores look better... disappointing to me!!

>>

>> Jackie

>> On Jun 19, 2007, at 6:46 PM, Kaye Bates wrote:

>>

>>> This is the craziest stuff I have ever heard!

>>> Teachers are SUPPOSED to assess children before

>> they

>>> start teaching them and TEACH THEM AT THEIR

>> LEVEL!!!!

>>> General ed or special ed, it doesn't matter, this

>> is

>>> what good teachers do. It is nuts to make a child

>> do

>>> tons of work on a level way below their ability.

>> I

>>> assess them before we start, every two weeks to

>> make

>>> sure we are making progress, and at the end to see

>> how

>>> far we went! There is not even a general ed class

>>> that has all students on the same level (unless

>> they

>>> previously tested them and then grouped them

>> according

>>> to level!)

>>>

>>> WHAT IN THE WORLD ARE THEY DOING TO YOUR KID?????

>>>

>>> I would go crazy too if it was me! I feel so

>> sorry

>>> for them!

>>>

>>> Kaye

>>> --- and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs@...>

>> wrote:

>>>

>>>> Hi.

>>>> My son was given the " right " to do extra work

>>>> AFTER HIS GRADE-LEVEL work was done, too. He got

>> so

>>>> bored and mad that he had to do double the work.

>> At

>>>> first, we were all trying to figure out why he

>> was

>>>> getting so mad (and why he would simply shut down

>>>> and suddenly wouldn't do either

>>>> work),,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,then it " dawned " on me and

>> we

>>>> chatted with the teacher.

>>>> What they decided was that if he coud do the

>>>> end-of-chapter " review " .............(usually

>>>> 1sheet/2sheets),,,,,then he would simply do " his

>>>> level " when everyone else did " their level " .

>>>> ------------------------------

>>>>

>>>> He's always had a rough time with writing as

>> well.

>>>> He presses so hard that sometimes the sheets

>> would

>>>> rip.

>>>> He received OT and was told he could do

>> anything

>>>> that required writing, on a computer.

>>>> They did let him have an Alpha Smart at

>>>> school,,,,,,but it seemed too hard to actually

>>>> quickly SEE what he was doing.

>>>> Sometimes, the room " helper " would write what

>> he

>>>> said for him. I did this at home for him, too.

>>>> They weren't saying that he didn't have to

>> learn

>>>> how to write,,,,,,,,,,,he did have to....and they

>>>> worked on his sensory issues with the

>>>> pressure,,,,,,but they also acknowledged that it

>> was

>>>> rough for him.

>>>> (One of my things to try to get him to be aware

>> of

>>>> his " grip and pressure " was to always find new

>> and

>>>> cool pencils. This thrilled

>> him..........probably

>>>> too much, though,,,,,,,,cause he would be

>> mesmerized

>>>> if there was a new feel/design........hee hee.

>>>> Sigh.

>>>> Oh - and I'm no

>> expert,,,,,,,,,,,but,,,,,,,,,since

>>>> he's basically doing double the work(at

>>>> home?),,,,,,,,,could you have him do " his level "

>>>> work and if things are going good once that's

>> done,

>>>> perhaps have him try the " boring " stuff? That

>> way,

>>>> if he doesn't do it both, at least he's proven

>> that

>>>> he grasps where his level is at. ???? Then,

>> explain

>>>> to the teacher (if it didn't all get done) that

>> it

>>>> just isn't fair for him to have double). Explain

>>>> that " gifted " doesn't mean " want more

>>>> work " ,,,,,,,,,,,

>>>> I just remember the boredom and anger my son

>> had

>>>> with the " boring " work. Makes me sad for him

>> when I

>>>> think about how long he had to do both.

>>>> Good luck.

>>>> Robin

>>>>

>>>> <hunebear3@...> wrote:

>>>> ,

>>>>

>>>> Yes.. the school makes him do rewrites... I'm

>> guilty

>>>> of it myself

>>>> BEFORE I knew of the AS! I'm going to ask for a

>>>> dysgraphia evaluation!

>>>> We'll see out that goes. likes his gifted

>>>> class, but I'm sure

>>>> he would love to go even further! He's in the 4th

>>>> grade but functions

>>>> academically on a 6-7 grade level. So there's

>> only

>>>> so much he can do

>>>> in the public school system. I also feel that he

>> is

>>>> being " punished "

>>>> because he can not have enrichment work until he

>>>> completes the current

>>>> grade work. He feels this is a waste of his time

>> and

>>>> gets days behind

>>>> and loses recess(which he could really care less

>>>> about)or the send him

>>>> to the library... which he LOVES! He usually gets

>>>> good grades but

>>>> HATES all of the homework that he has to do. It's

>>>> such a battle to get

>>>> him to do the homework. Sometimes I physically

>> have

>>>> to hold him at the

>>>> table... which I hate to do!

>>>>

>>>> As for hating writing... he has always disliked.

>> He

>>>> has a bad pencil

>>>> grip and I was told by the school OT that it was

>> too

>>>> late to change it.

>>>> I have been trying to get this corrected since

>> first

>>>> grade... bad

>>>> experience there!

>>>>

>>>> I'm learning so much for you guys! Glad that I

>> found

>>>> this group.

>>>>

>>>> Jackie

>>>> On Jun 18, 2007, at 2:32 PM, LJL wrote:

>>>>

>>>>> Everybody uses something different. My second

>> son

>>>> (not diagnosed on

>>>>> the spectrum) was evaluated as gifted. It's nice

>>>> to allow him to go

>>

> === message truncated ===

>

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June 20, 2007

You said it perfectly: WHY CAN'T PARENTS TEACH THEIR KIDS TO BE NICE! Did you all see in the news last month about that lady whose daughter was bullying kids and for punishment she made her carry a sign saying I'M A BULLY! I wanted to contact her and thank her for being proactive about her daughters cruel actions. Some of my co-workers were talking about how "extreme" that punishment was and I said "clearly you don't have a child that has been bullied". I don't think people understand just how devastating the behavior (bullying) is. and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs@...> wrote: I hear ya. Ian came back from the pool angry that other people kept taking the ball from him when he was playing catch with someone. I said, "hey....that's nice that others wanted to play though, right?" He said that they were taking the ball and basically "teasing" him and the other kid,,,,saying, "oh,,,,you want the ball?" and laughing. He's getting down about the whole thing. Why can't people teach their kids to be nice? Pisses me off. I want to always be "right there" to ward off the bullies.....to let them SEE that I'm right there as to not mess with him,,,,,,,,,,yet I feel like he's got to get used to this,,,,,,,ya know? Doesn't that sound horrible? If it was up to me,,,,,which,,,I know - it is,,,,,,,but if he

didn't want to go over to the pool or want to be by others sometimes,,,,,he'd be better off. Or maybe it's ME who'd be better off? Breaks my heart. Little mean shits. Robin <hunebear3comcast (DOT) net> wrote: Robin,Too bad... we would be a pretty good match too. Our kids are all pretty much the same age... except I have 3 children and you have 4! My daughters are 8 and 4!Oh well... we can still "talk" here! I think it's wonderful that I can see that there are other children out there that do the same thing as mine. It's hard sometimes to realize that he has a DX because he's so smart and other times I have a hard time believing that he really is 10.5 years old!I just picked him up from Summer Enrichment School and he was so agitated. Dodge Ball was the

issue today! Seems that he was the target of some children's aggression, or at least in his eyes he was!JackieOn Jun 19, 2007, at 2:10 PM, and/or Robin Lemke wrote:> Hi.> We're in Wisconsin. Shoot. Oh well. hee hee.> Ian just turned 11 last month. (9 yr old daughter, 7 yr old son and 5 > yr old daughter, too) > Robin>>> wrote:>> I WISH!! I live in TN... not sure where you are! My son is 10.5...>> how old is yours?>>>> Every time I read a post that sounds like my situation... I>> think..."maybe they live near me"! I know one thing this group is>> making me want to reach out to locals with AS and see what sort of>> support groups that I can find. I know there are several with in a 30>> minute drive! It would be "nice" to be with other families that have>>

children just like mine... that would be treated "normally"! I hate>> those awful stares at the grocery store when my son throws himself >> down>> on the floor OR is screeching at me about How I mistreat him and how >> he>> has an awful life and it's worthless! I told one woman that tried to>> help me with some "advice" to mind her own business and until she had>> walked a day in MY shoes to keep her mouth shut! That didn't go over>> too well either... but she did walk away! LOL>>>> Jackie>> On Jun 19, 2007, at 7:38 AM, and/or Robin Lemke wrote:>>>> > Oh Jackie.>> > PLEASE tell me that your son is about my son's age and that you live>> > near me!!!!!>> > Ha ha......sob.>> > Why can't any of us live near eachother?????>> > Robin>> >>> >

wrote:>> >> Robin,>> >> Your son sounds like mine! If anyone touches/bumps him he yells >> that>> >> they hit him 100 times! He slumps over and acts like he just got >> the>> >> heck beat out of him. OMG let's talk about when he loses in a >> game...>> >> Same response as your son... "It's not fair, I don't want to play >> your>> >> stupid game anyway". My son YES's me when we talk about the >> incidents>> >> after the fact. He's got his learned responses down... but doesn't>> >> understand WHY he's saying them!>> >>>> >> My son doesn't have any friends either! SO sad!>> >>>> >> Jackie>> >> On Jun 18, 2007, at 3:37 PM, and/or Robin Lemke wrote:>> >>>> >> > If my

son and another kid go for a ball and God-forbid, my son>> >> doesn't>> >> > end up with it,,,,,or something just-as-bad - gets knocked over >> or>> >> > "touched" or hurt in any way, he's yelling that they hurt him and>> >> that>> >> > the game is stupid and starts to growl and his head sinks into >> his>> >> > shoulders.........it's awful.>> >> > We're really working on this now.....ugh.>> >> > As far as 4-square.......well,,,,,,,,,,it seems the boys will do >> the>> >> > different "passes" and make it hard for eachother and try to get>> >> > eachother "out"....>> >> > Well,,,,,,Ian freaks when he gets out.......saying they aren't>> >> playing>> >> >

fair. It's sad, actually.>> >> > He just does't "comprehend" AT THE TIME that THAT'S how the game>> >> goes.>> >> > He gets it later,,,,,after we chat. But,,,,by then, the damage >> is>> >> > done. No one wants to play.................I kinda don't blame>> >> them.>> >> > Sigh.>> >> > Robin >> >> >>> >> > wrote:>> >> >> I have "tag" issues! My son tags just a little too hard... then>> >> has to>> >> >> sit down the rest of Recess!!>> >> >>>> >> >> Jackie>> >> >> On Jun 18, 2007, at 12:45 PM, and/or Robin Lemke wrote:>> >> >>>> >> >> > We had "4-square" nightmares,

too!!!!!>> >> >> > What was yours?>> >> >> > Robin>> >> >> >>> >> >> > Roxanna wrote:>> >> >> >> Thanks for writing all that. I agree with you. I just >> wondered>> >> >> what>> >> >> >> kinds of stuff you have found around here to do. Sounds like>> >> there>> >> >> >> are a lot of options really. That makes me feel much >> better. >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> When the boys read in the afternoon - is this what they do>> >> because>> >> >> >> they like to read or do you direct it more. I mean, do you>> >> require>> >> >> >> reading time vs. time spent on

computer games, etc. My ds is>> >> >> really>> >> >> >> into computers and gaming. My biggest problem will be having>> >> him>> >> >> do>> >> >> >> other things besides playing games. I don't think it will be>> >> >> >> impossible to put together new routines and rules - just >> that it>> >> >> will>> >> >> >> take effort. lol. Also, if you require reading time, do you>> >> have>> >> >> >> them pick a subject and then help them stay focused on that>> >> >> subject? >> >> >> >> Do you ask questions each day or have them write reports or>> >> >> >> presentations on what they are learning? Or do you let

them>> >> read>> >> >> >> whatever subject they want that week? Do you use virtual>> >> school or>> >> >> >> do you homeschool from "scratch?" >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> The playground scenes you describe are exactly what happens >> to>> >> my>> >> >> ds,>> >> >> >> 10 yo. He wanders around, never fitting in with any one >> "group">> >> >> and>> >> >> >> then outright struggling in some situations like the "four>> >> square">> >> >> >> nightmare we had the last few weeks of school. The good >> thing>> >> >> about>> >> >> >> middle school is that lunch and recess are

total of 30 >> minutes>> >> and>> >> >> >> only once a day. Still, I worry. I want to see if they can>> >> have>> >> >> him>> >> >> >> work in the office or help with something instead of just >> wander>> >> >> >> around trying to play. And even then, he might get mad and >> feel>> >> >> he's>> >> >> >> being punished if he isn't allowed to just hang out like the>> >> >> others. >> >> >> >> So we will have to watch how we set things up. Who knows. >> >> Middle>> >> >> >> school is really the land of the unknown even having gone>> >> through>> >> >> it>> >> >> >>

already with the oldest ds! Maybe that even makes it worse>> >> >> because I>> >> >> >> know what can happen and go wrong. >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> Roxanna>> >> >> >> Autism Happens>> >> >> >>> Re: ( ) Homeschooling ASpie kids>> >> >> >>>>> >> >> >>> We start at 8am. We are done by noon. Things that happen >> after>> >> >> noon>> >> >> >>> often 'count' as

educational - the boys were in 2 hours of>> >> >> homeschool>> >> >> >>> afternoon PE classes, for example. Our social activities >> happen>> >> >> >>> after>> >> >> >>> noon as well. I put quotes around the word 'count' because>> >> truly,>> >> >> so>> >> >> >>> many things are educational that are not sit down structured>> >> >> workbook>> >> >> >>> stuff. We belong to a homeschool nature journaling club for>> >> >> example>> >> >> >>> that meets on a monthly basis, and the kids have taken off >> with>> >> >> >>> that.>> >> >> >>> On their own, Ethan is reading about the Middle East, and>>

>> >> >> >> is>> >> >> >>> reading about black-capped chickadees. They have time to>> >> devote to>> >> >> >>> their interests because once their workbooks are done, they>> >> are on>> >> >> >>> their own to do things. Back in March opted to >> research>> >> >> rocks>> >> >> >>> and minerals. Ethan read about US in the 1800's.>> >> >> >>>>> >> >> >>> Anyway, back to social stuff. I keep them active in scouts, >> and>> >> >> >>> >> >> >> >>> participates in baseball. During the school year, I also had>> >> them>> >> >> in>> >> >> >>> the after

school PTA specials, so Ethan did chess and >> >> did>> >> >> the>> >> >> >>> zoo club.>> >> >> >>>>> >> >> >>> We belong to a hiking club that has public schooled kids. We>> >> met>> >> >> on>> >> >> >>> T>> >> >> >>> nights to hike during the public school year - now we are>> >> meeting>> >> >> >>> throughout the week at various times. Last week we even >> went on>> >> >> two>> >> >> >>> hikes the same day - one hike with a family that has three>> >> kids.>> >> >> >>> Another hike with two families that have four kids.>> >> >> >>>>> >>

>> >>> Every T afternoon we head to a local town and meet other>> >> >> homeschool>> >> >> >>> kids. There are 30 families in this particular group (it's>> >> >> >>> ecclectic)>> >> >> >>> and 5-10 families show up each week to play for several >> hours.>> >> >> >>>>> >> >> >>> We also have weekly playdates with a homeschool family in>> >> another>> >> >> >>> town. A couple of weeks ago Ethan came up to me at a park >> and>> >> said>> >> >> >>> he>> >> >> >>> did not want to play what the other kids were playing. I >> told>> >> him>> >> >> >>> that>> >> >>

>>> it was ok - that he could do something else. He then said,>> >> "But I>> >> >> >>> want>> >> >> >>> to be where the other kids are." That's pretty big coming >> from>> >> >> him!>> >> >> >>>>> >> >> >>> Anyway, IF you decide to take your son home, let me know. >> You>> >> >> can't>> >> >> >>> believe how Ethan has bloomed in this environment. This is>> >> pretty>> >> >> >>> much>> >> >> >>> a direct quote from him, "I get a lot more done in a lot >> less>> >> >> time,>> >> >> >>> and>> >> >> >>> I get to spend more time doing what I want and playing

with>> >> other>> >> >> >>> kids. I also get to see Baby more.">> >> >> >>>>> >> >> >>> I don't believe for a minute that Ethan is suffering >> socially.>> >> I>> >> >> >>> used to go to recess and watch him from my car circling the>> >> >> >>> playground biting his coat in anxiety. 30 minutes was not>> >> enough>> >> >> >>> time for him to relax and engage with others. The 20-30 >> minute>> >> >> lunch>> >> >> >>> he got where he could have spent time talking with other >> kids>> >> was>> >> >> a>> >> >> >>> loss on him as well. The environment was too loud. There was>> >>

too>> >> >> >>> much to watch. He liked to time how long it took classes to>> >> line>> >> >> up>> >> >> >>> and leave. He liked to be first in line and would pay>> >> attention to>> >> >> >>> the cues that his table was about to be dismissed. When >> other>> >> kids>> >> >> >>> talked to him, he did not hear them. The final 15 minutes in>> >> the>> >> >> day>> >> >> >>> devoted to recess - a joke for any kid let alone a child on >> the>> >> >> >>> spectrum. As far as social interactions throughout the rest >> of>> >> the>> >> >> >>> day? They might talk in line, but getting in trouble for >>

doing>> >> so>> >> >> >>> made Ethan not only stop but get mad and yell at other kids >> for>> >> >> doing>> >> >> >>> it. They were told to read a book when they got done with >> desk>> >> >> work ->> >> >> >>> not talk to others.>> >> >> >>>>> >> >> >>> Anyway, sorry to go on and on, LOL - I am passionate about>> >> this. I>> >> >> >>> don't think it is for every family or every kid but it >> always>> >> >> gets my>> >> >> >>> underthings bunched up when somebody makes it seem like>> >> >> homeschooled>> >> >> >>> kids are raised in bubbles. I don't think that every time

a>> >> family>> >> >> >>> is having trouble with the school they ought to homeschool. >> I>> >> >> don't>> >> >> >>> think every time a homeschool family is struggling with>> >> >> socialization>> >> >> >>> that public school is the solution, either.>> >> >> >>>>> >> >> >>> >> >> >> >>>>> >> >> >>> >> >> >> >>> >>> >> >> >>> > How does he get contact with other kids while being>> >> >> homeschooled?>> >> >> >>> >>> >> >> >>>

> Roxanna>> >> >> >>> > Autism Happens>> >> >> >>>>> >> >> >>> >> >> > Need a vacation? Get great deals to amazing places on >> >> Travel.>> >> >> >>> >> > Park yourself in front of a world of choices in alternative>> >> vehicles.>> >> > Visit the Auto Green Center.>> > You snooze, you lose. Get messages ASAP with AutoCheck>> > in the all-new Beta.> oneSearch: Finally, mobile search that gives answers, not web > links. Be a better Globetrotter. Get better travel answers from someone who knows. Answers - Check it out.

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June 20, 2007

Marie, I am glad you found what worked best for your family too! I also have no support generally and am a single mom. The schools that I have tried for my daughter think that I am nuts. LOL I have had to explain to every new therapist about my daughter and the issues she has--she does well in therapy 1:1 but can't do the same things in public/other venues. Seems every therapist she has had, went on leave for pregnancy or some other reason. Or we have moved hoping for a better school system. My friends disappeared quickly. My family has no clue and thinks I am just too overprotective and make excuses for bad behavior. The only support that I have IRL has been her specialists as they know high functioning autistic children and understand my daughter ...and they know I am not just nuts. So many people (pediatricians/schools) have wanted to just medicate my

daughter for ADHD which she does not have. To slow her down. One thing that does make it easier is that I have only one child. I don't know if she would enjoy homeschooling as much if she had siblings. I think it would be harder to get her to work on anything. She loves to talk to children and will talk non-stop. I found putting her in school much harder than homeschooling. I was worried constantly and didn't know what exactly was going on in school. My daughter couldn't tell me after the fact and her teachers downplayed or didn't notice much until she was totally out of control. I only knew from the teachers notes to me about how she had been disciplined repeatedly each day. I also sat in and watched classes and eventually withdrew her from what I saw. IN the last school, I sat in on her last day there and saw how my daughter reacted to an Elmo Movie on fire safety.

She covered her ears, moaning loudly, rocking, getting louder and more upset. I waited to see what the teacher/1:1 aide would do. They did nothing. So I removed my daughter from the room. The teacher and aide ran after us into the hall. I was asked what are you doing? She is missing fire safety! You can't take her. As if I was kidnapping my own child. I said she is upset and will meltdown if you don't remove her to a quieter place until the movie is over. They should know this from my talking to them prior and from their experieces with her. It seems they were only removing her after she got aggressive or totally out of control. Which was way too late as her day was ruined and she continued melting down all day. That was the day I decided to homeschool and stop trying to find the right school for her. Even with a 1:1 aide, they refused to do what is best for my daughter (and obviously they weren't listening to the one person who knew my child--me).

Remove her to the special ed room for a bit until she calmed down. My daughter loved going to school as there were children there. I just don't feel that it was the best placement for her as the adults didn't understand and weren't treating her well. They were only punishing her. LJL <laura6307@...> wrote: I'm glad, and I do mean this sincerely, that you found what worked best for your family! > Does anyone homeschool an aspie child? I will be homeschooling one next > school year because the reg schools are not meeting his needs properly.> > Christian> > > > > > ------------------------------------------------------------> Building a website is a piece of cake. > Small Business gives you all the tools to get online. > > ------------------------------------------------------------> > No virus found in this

incoming message.> Checked by AVG Free Edition. > Version: 7.5.472 / Virus Database: 269.9.0/851 - Release Date: 16/06/2007 12:50 PM> > > > > > ----------------------------------------------------------------> Be a better Heartthrob. Get better relationship answers from someone who knows.> Answers - Check it out. > > > > ----------------------------------------------------------------> > > No virus found in this incoming message.> Checked by AVG Free Edition. > Version: 7.5.472 / Virus Database: 269.9.0/852 - Release Date: 17/06/2007 8:23 AM> > > > > > > --------------------------------------------------------------------> > > No virus found in this

incoming message.> Checked by AVG Free Edition. > Version: 7.5.472 / Virus Database: 269.9.1/854 - Release Date: 19/06/2007 1:12 PM>

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June 20, 2007

My daughter is 6 and just started softball. Yesterday was their first game, I was a nervous wreck. Thinking if her team lost, it would be awful for her and she might get aggressive with the other team. Thank goodness they didn't keep score. She was asking me questions all day--about what would happen if she got 3 strikes--I told her that they didn't do strikes in HER game, she had been watching baseball on tv. She did pretty well. She was the only one jumping up and down, mimicing hitting the ball--she wanted the person at bat to hurry up so she could run or catch the ball. And when she would get a run in, she would yell I got a homerun!!! LOL One thing happened that made my heart stop as I thought this is it, we are going to have to leave......she is really sensitive to laughing. Well her first time at bat, she walked up too quickly and the person placing the ball on the tee, hit her in the head with

an elbow. EVERYONE laughed--on the field and off. She was so intent on hitting the ball that she didn't notice--didn't even look up when it happened. A big whew for me. (They wear helmets so she was fine) She got upset when she was on 3rd base and the other team got 3 of her teammates out, so it was time for her team to go to the outfield, she was yelling but I haven't got a homerun yet!!! She had to be physically led away from 3rd base but she didn't meltdown. Oh and she kept running out to talk to the coaches ON The field when she was waiting on the sidelines for her turn to bat. She would raise her hand to speak. LOL The one thing she got from public school. <hunebear3@...> wrote: It's so nice to be able to talk with other parents who have children that think JUST LIKE MINE! LOLJackieOn Jun 19, 2007, at 3:01 PM, LJL wrote:> Last year when Ethan was 8 he accused the person pitching the ball of> trying to get him out - this is coach pitched ball - so the coach was> actually on his team. It did not make a difference to him. LOL.> >>> >>>>

Robin,>>>> Too bad... we would be a pretty good match too. Our kids are all>> pretty much the same age... except I have 3 children and you have> 4!>> My daughters are 8 and 4!>>>> Oh well... we can still "talk" here! I think it's wonderful that I> can>> see that there are other children out there that do the same thing> as>> mine. It's hard sometimes to realize that he has a DX because he's> so>> smart and other times I have a hard time believing that he really> is>> 10.5 years old!>>>> I just picked him up from Summer Enrichment School and he was so>> agitated. Dodge Ball was the issue today! Seems that he was the>> target of some children's aggression, or at least in his eyes he> was!>>>> Jackie>>>>> Autism...Solve the

Puzzle!>> Post message: >> Unsubscribe: -unsubscribe >> List owner: -owner >>>

June 20, 2007

Hi Pam,Yup. We've lived there 15 years. We're going back in June or July of '08, when ds is finished at Dean. How long are you going to be in San Diego? I sure miss the beaches and the nice hiking trails by the beaches. (and our nice swimming pool)LizOn Jun 20, 2007, at 9:11 AM, ppanda65@... wrote:Liz, Do you live in San Diego (when you are in CA?)...we are visiting there in August. Pam :)See what's free at AOL.com.

June 20, 2007

Liz, we will be there for a week (just dh and I). I am so looking forward to it. Will probably spend most of my time at the zoo visiting the pandas. Pam :)See what's free at AOL.com.

June 20, 2007

Thanks Liz, we are going to buy the three day pass to get in Sea World, the Zoo and the Wild Animal Park. DH already bought Padres tickets so we will go to a game one night. Pam :)See what's free at AOL.com.

June 21, 2007

You said it, woman!!! Yep,,,I saw that story. I loved it too. And you're right,,,,,those people who think it was too extreme were never bullied and their kids either aren't bullied or they don't know they are. *** Having all kids "fit in" is such a simple request. It would be so easy to implement. If my kids left others out or said something they shouldn't to someone else, I'd be on them quicker than,,,,,,,I don't know. We've always taught them to defend the "one left out". To be a friend to anyone who needs it. ALSO,,,,to forgive the "asses" if they are willing to treat you the way they should. Otherwise,,,,,,defend yourself. It's best to only have your family,,,than to have a bunch of "people" around who aren't in it for the long haul. WHY CAN'T EVERYONE DO THIS????? Think of the troubles

that our kids wouldn't have if they knew they were accepted and that SOMEONE would want to hang with them. Ugh. Robin Haskin <babydoll_haskin@...> wrote: You said it perfectly: WHY CAN'T PARENTS TEACH THEIR KIDS TO BE NICE! Did you all see in the news last month about that lady whose daughter was bullying kids and for punishment she made her carry a sign saying I'M A BULLY! I wanted to contact her and thank her for being proactive about her daughters

cruel actions. Some of my co-workers were talking about how "extreme" that punishment was and I said "clearly you don't have a child that has been bullied". I don't think people understand just how devastating the behavior (bullying) is. and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs > wrote: I hear ya. Ian came back from the pool angry that other people kept taking the ball from him when he was playing catch with someone. I said, "hey....that's nice that others wanted to play though, right?" He said that they were taking the ball and basically "teasing" him and the other kid,,,,saying, "oh,,,,you want the ball?" and laughing. He's getting down about the whole thing. Why can't people teach their kids to be nice? Pisses me

off. I want to always be "right there" to ward off the bullies.....to let them SEE that I'm right there as to not mess with him,,,,,,,,,,yet I feel like he's got to get used to this,,,,,,,ya know? Doesn't that sound horrible? If it was up to me,,,,,which,,,I know - it is,,,,,,,but if he didn't want to go over to the pool or want to be by others sometimes,,,,,he'd be better off. Or maybe it's ME who'd be better off? Breaks my heart. Little mean shits. Robin <hunebear3comcast (DOT) net> wrote: Robin,Too bad... we would be a pretty good match too. Our kids are all pretty much the same age... except I have 3 children and you have 4! My daughters are 8 and 4!Oh well... we can still "talk" here! I think it's wonderful that I can

see that there are other children out there that do the same thing as mine. It's hard sometimes to realize that he has a DX because he's so smart and other times I have a hard time believing that he really is 10.5 years old!I just picked him up from Summer Enrichment School and he was so agitated. Dodge Ball was the issue today! Seems that he was the target of some children's aggression, or at least in his eyes he was!JackieOn Jun 19, 2007, at 2:10 PM, and/or Robin Lemke wrote:> Hi.> We're in Wisconsin. Shoot. Oh well. hee hee.> Ian just turned 11 last month. (9 yr old daughter, 7 yr old son and 5 > yr old daughter, too) > Robin>>> wrote:>> I WISH!! I live in TN... not sure where you are! My son is 10.5...>> how old is yours?>>>> Every time I read a post that sounds like my

situation... I>> think..."maybe they live near me"! I know one thing this group is>> making me want to reach out to locals with AS and see what sort of>> support groups that I can find. I know there are several with in a 30>> minute drive! It would be "nice" to be with other families that have>> children just like mine... that would be treated "normally"! I hate>> those awful stares at the grocery store when my son throws himself >> down>> on the floor OR is screeching at me about How I mistreat him and how >> he>> has an awful life and it's worthless! I told one woman that tried to>> help me with some "advice" to mind her own business and until she had>> walked a day in MY shoes to keep her mouth shut! That didn't go over>> too well either... but she did walk away! LOL>>>> Jackie>> On Jun 19, 2007, at 7:38 AM,

and/or Robin Lemke wrote:>>>> > Oh Jackie.>> > PLEASE tell me that your son is about my son's age and that you live>> > near me!!!!!>> > Ha ha......sob.>> > Why can't any of us live near eachother?????>> > Robin>> >>> > wrote:>> >> Robin,>> >> Your son sounds like mine! If anyone touches/bumps him he yells >> that>> >> they hit him 100 times! He slumps over and acts like he just got >> the>> >> heck beat out of him. OMG let's talk about when he loses in a >> game...>> >> Same response as your son... "It's not fair, I don't want to play >> your>> >> stupid game anyway". My son YES's me when we talk about the >> incidents>> >> after the fact. He's got his learned responses down...

but doesn't>> >> understand WHY he's saying them!>> >>>> >> My son doesn't have any friends either! SO sad!>> >>>> >> Jackie>> >> On Jun 18, 2007, at 3:37 PM, and/or Robin Lemke wrote:>> >>>> >> > If my son and another kid go for a ball and God-forbid, my son>> >> doesn't>> >> > end up with it,,,,,or something just-as-bad - gets knocked over >> or>> >> > "touched" or hurt in any way, he's yelling that they hurt him and>> >> that>> >> > the game is stupid and starts to growl and his head sinks into >> his>> >> > shoulders.........it's awful.>> >> > We're really working on this now.....ugh.>> >> > As far as 4-square.......well,,,,,,,,,,it

seems the boys will do >> the>> >> > different "passes" and make it hard for eachother and try to get>> >> > eachother "out"....>> >> > Well,,,,,,Ian freaks when he gets out.......saying they aren't>> >> playing>> >> > fair. It's sad, actually.>> >> > He just does't "comprehend" AT THE TIME that THAT'S how the game>> >> goes.>> >> > He gets it later,,,,,after we chat. But,,,,by then, the damage >> is>> >> > done. No one wants to play.................I kinda don't blame>> >> them.>> >> > Sigh.>> >> > Robin >> >> >>> >> > wrote:>> >> >> I have "tag" issues! My son tags just a little too hard... then>>

>> has to>> >> >> sit down the rest of Recess!!>> >> >>>> >> >> Jackie>> >> >> On Jun 18, 2007, at 12:45 PM, and/or Robin Lemke wrote:>> >> >>>> >> >> > We had "4-square" nightmares, too!!!!!>> >> >> > What was yours?>> >> >> > Robin>> >> >> >>> >> >> > Roxanna wrote:>> >> >> >> Thanks for writing all that. I agree with you. I just >> wondered>> >> >> what>> >> >> >> kinds of stuff you have found around here to do. Sounds like>> >> there>> >> >> >> are a lot of options really. That makes me feel much >> better. >> >> >> >>

>> >> >> >> When the boys read in the afternoon - is this what they do>> >> because>> >> >> >> they like to read or do you direct it more. I mean, do you>> >> require>> >> >> >> reading time vs. time spent on computer games, etc. My ds is>> >> >> really>> >> >> >> into computers and gaming. My biggest problem will be having>> >> him>> >> >> do>> >> >> >> other things besides playing games. I don't think it will be>> >> >> >> impossible to put together new routines and rules - just >> that it>> >> >> will>> >> >> >> take effort. lol. Also, if you require reading time, do you>> >> have>>

>> >> >> them pick a subject and then help them stay focused on that>> >> >> subject? >> >> >> >> Do you ask questions each day or have them write reports or>> >> >> >> presentations on what they are learning? Or do you let them>> >> read>> >> >> >> whatever subject they want that week? Do you use virtual>> >> school or>> >> >> >> do you homeschool from "scratch?" >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> The playground scenes you describe are exactly what happens >> to>> >> my>> >> >> ds,>> >> >> >> 10 yo. He wanders around, never fitting in with any one >> "group">> >> >> and>> >> >> >>

then outright struggling in some situations like the "four>> >> square">> >> >> >> nightmare we had the last few weeks of school. The good >> thing>> >> >> about>> >> >> >> middle school is that lunch and recess are total of 30 >> minutes>> >> and>> >> >> >> only once a day. Still, I worry. I want to see if they can>> >> have>> >> >> him>> >> >> >> work in the office or help with something instead of just >> wander>> >> >> >> around trying to play. And even then, he might get mad and >> feel>> >> >> he's>> >> >> >> being punished if he isn't allowed to just hang out like the>> >> >> others. >>

>> >> >> So we will have to watch how we set things up. Who knows. >> >> Middle>> >> >> >> school is really the land of the unknown even having gone>> >> through>> >> >> it>> >> >> >> already with the oldest ds! Maybe that even makes it worse>> >> >> because I>> >> >> >> know what can happen and go wrong. >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> Roxanna>> >> >> >> Autism Happens>> >> >> >>> Re: ( ) Homeschooling ASpie kids>> >> >> >>>>> >> >> >>> We start at 8am. We are done by noon. Things that happen >> after>> >> >> noon>> >> >> >>> often 'count' as educational - the boys were in 2 hours of>> >> >> homeschool>> >> >> >>> afternoon PE classes, for example. Our social activities >> happen>> >> >> >>> after>> >> >> >>> noon as well. I put quotes around the word 'count' because>> >> truly,>> >> >> so>> >> >> >>> many things are educational that are not sit down structured>> >> >> workbook>> >> >> >>> stuff. We belong to a homeschool nature journaling club

for>> >> >> example>> >> >> >>> that meets on a monthly basis, and the kids have taken off >> with>> >> >> >>> that.>> >> >> >>> On their own, Ethan is reading about the Middle East, and>> >> >> >> >> is>> >> >> >>> reading about black-capped chickadees. They have time to>> >> devote to>> >> >> >>> their interests because once their workbooks are done, they>> >> are on>> >> >> >>> their own to do things. Back in March opted to >> research>> >> >> rocks>> >> >> >>> and minerals. Ethan read about US in the 1800's.>> >> >> >>>>> >> >> >>> Anyway, back to

social stuff. I keep them active in scouts, >> and>> >> >> >>> >> >> >> >>> participates in baseball. During the school year, I also had>> >> them>> >> >> in>> >> >> >>> the after school PTA specials, so Ethan did chess and >> >> did>> >> >> the>> >> >> >>> zoo club.>> >> >> >>>>> >> >> >>> We belong to a hiking club that has public schooled kids. We>> >> met>> >> >> on>> >> >> >>> T>> >> >> >>> nights to hike during the public school year - now we are>> >> meeting>> >> >> >>> throughout the week at various times. Last week we even >> went

on>> >> >> two>> >> >> >>> hikes the same day - one hike with a family that has three>> >> kids.>> >> >> >>> Another hike with two families that have four kids.>> >> >> >>>>> >> >> >>> Every T afternoon we head to a local town and meet other>> >> >> homeschool>> >> >> >>> kids. There are 30 families in this particular group (it's>> >> >> >>> ecclectic)>> >> >> >>> and 5-10 families show up each week to play for several >> hours.>> >> >> >>>>> >> >> >>> We also have weekly playdates with a homeschool family in>> >> another>> >> >> >>> town. A couple of weeks ago Ethan came up to me at

a park >> and>> >> said>> >> >> >>> he>> >> >> >>> did not want to play what the other kids were playing. I >> told>> >> him>> >> >> >>> that>> >> >> >>> it was ok - that he could do something else. He then said,>> >> "But I>> >> >> >>> want>> >> >> >>> to be where the other kids are." That's pretty big coming >> from>> >> >> him!>> >> >> >>>>> >> >> >>> Anyway, IF you decide to take your son home, let me know. >> You>> >> >> can't>> >> >> >>> believe how Ethan has bloomed in this environment. This is>> >> pretty>> >> >>

>>> much>> >> >> >>> a direct quote from him, "I get a lot more done in a lot >> less>> >> >> time,>> >> >> >>> and>> >> >> >>> I get to spend more time doing what I want and playing with>> >> other>> >> >> >>> kids. I also get to see Baby more.">> >> >> >>>>> >> >> >>> I don't believe for a minute that Ethan is suffering >> socially.>> >> I>> >> >> >>> used to go to recess and watch him from my car circling the>> >> >> >>> playground biting his coat in anxiety. 30 minutes was not>> >> enough>> >> >> >>> time for him to relax and engage with others. The 20-30 >> minute>> >>

>> lunch>> >> >> >>> he got where he could have spent time talking with other >> kids>> >> was>> >> >> a>> >> >> >>> loss on him as well. The environment was too loud. There was>> >> too>> >> >> >>> much to watch. He liked to time how long it took classes to>> >> line>> >> >> up>> >> >> >>> and leave. He liked to be first in line and would pay>> >> attention to>> >> >> >>> the cues that his table was about to be dismissed. When >> other>> >> kids>> >> >> >>> talked to him, he did not hear them. The final 15 minutes in>> >> the>> >> >> day>> >> >> >>> devoted to recess - a

joke for any kid let alone a child on >> the>> >> >> >>> spectrum. As far as social interactions throughout the rest >> of>> >> the>> >> >> >>> day? They might talk in line, but getting in trouble for >> doing>> >> so>> >> >> >>> made Ethan not only stop but get mad and yell at other kids >> for>> >> >> doing>> >> >> >>> it. They were told to read a book when they got done with >> desk>> >> >> work ->> >> >> >>> not talk to others.>> >> >> >>>>> >> >> >>> Anyway, sorry to go on and on, LOL - I am passionate about>> >> this. I>> >> >> >>> don't think it is for every family or every kid but

it >> always>> >> >> gets my>> >> >> >>> underthings bunched up when somebody makes it seem like>> >> >> homeschooled>> >> >> >>> kids are raised in bubbles. I don't think that every time a>> >> family>> >> >> >>> is having trouble with the school they ought to homeschool. >> I>> >> >> don't>> >> >> >>> think every time a homeschool family is struggling with>> >> >> socialization>> >> >> >>> that public school is the solution, either.>> >> >> >>>>> >> >> >>> >> >> >> >>>>> >> >> >>> >> >> >> >>> >>> >> >> >>> > How does he get contact with other kids while being>> >> >> homeschooled?>> >> >> >>> >>> >> >> >>> > Roxanna>> >> >> >>> > Autism Happens>> >> >> >>>>> >> >> >>> >> >> > Need a vacation? Get great deals to amazing places on >> >> Travel.>> >> >> >>> >> > Park yourself in front of a world of choices in alternative>> >> vehicles.>> >> > Visit the Auto Green Center.>> > You snooze, you lose. Get messages ASAP with AutoCheck>> > in the all-new Beta.> oneSearch: Finally, mobile search that gives answers,

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June 21, 2007

Can I tell you a true story about my 18 year old

daughter, a? She's a plain old regular kid.

Sometimes I wonder what it must be like to be the

sibling of an AS child. But anyway...My Kris is a

very compassionate girl. I think having a special

little sister has made her very sensitive to other

kids. She started visiting in the intensive support

program at her high school when she had free time,

just seeing if she could help out or something. There

she met an autistic boy who was her age. He was not

very verbal but obviously very bright. She noticed

over the course of the year that he was very aware of

the high school dances. He would say that he had

invited a girlfriend and ordered a tux. One time he

told Kris that he really wanted to learn how to dance.

My daughter befriended this boy and taught him a few

dance steps. She slowly, over time, became aware that

his girlfriend was wishful thinking. One time she

found him on the computer, looking up different styles

of tuxedoes...looking up flowers...wishing so much

that he could just go to a high school dance. This

really got under the skin of my daughter. My kid is

really not so much into these things, she could take

them or leave them. One night she came and talked to

me and my husband and asked, would it be ok if she

asked this boy to her senior prom? She told us, it

was really no big deal at all to her if she went...She

started talking about all the things in her future

that she will get to do. And she thought of this boy

and how this was the one thing that meant ohhhhhhhh so

much to him. How it was one stupid dance. That he

would never get to have. So, Krissy asked him to the

dance. My husband called his grandmother, who raises

him, and asked if he could help Krissy take this boy

to the prom. The grandma cried. She could not

believe it. My daughter went shopping for a prom

dress like any other senior in high school. She paid

to have her hair and nails done. My husband got ahold

of a fancy car and played chauffeur. Krissy pinned a

flower on her date's lapel. He was so excited he was

literally jumping up and down for joy. His desired

dinner date was at a local pizza place. Not typical

prom fare. However, my daughter said, this is about

him. This is about giving him one special night that

he can treasure. He was dressed to the nines in a

tuxedo he chose himself. He went to the prom with my

daughter. The teacher's assistant from his class was

there in case he had any special needs that he would

need help with. My daughter danced her prom night

away with this very special young man. When they

dropped him off, he hugged the life out of her and

said..happy...happy...happy.... My husband made a

video of the whole thing so he can watch it over and

over. A lot of kids mocked and made fun of my

daughter for doing this. Some of them even went so

far as to try to trip this boy as he was dancing. My

daughter faced every last one of them down. In fact,

there were many kids that began to see, as the evening

wore on, that you can get a lot of joy from making

someone else happy. My daughter's friends also danced

with her date. He was on cloud nine. At the end of

the evening, I asked Kris...Are you glad you spent

your prom this way? And she said, mom, there are

different kinds of happy but I do believe this is the

best happy you could ever get out of a stupid high

school dance. And then she said, someday, my

little sister will be old enough to have a prom.

Maybe she won't care. But in the event she does...I

am paying it forward in the hopes that some boy will

care enough to make her as happy as I just did that

boy tonight. And she went to bed. I could have

cried. Sometimes your teenagers are so selfish and

ratty but they do have their moments of magnificence.

If only a few more kids could think this way.

Kaye

--- and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs@...> wrote:

> You said it, woman!!!

> Yep,,,I saw that story. I loved it too.

> And you're right,,,,,those people who think it was

> too extreme were never bullied and their kids either

> aren't bullied or they don't know they are.

> ***

> Having all kids " fit in " is such a simple request.

> It would be so easy to implement.

> If my kids left others out or said something they

> shouldn't to someone else, I'd be on them quicker

> than,,,,,,,I don't know.

> We've always taught them to defend the " one left

> out " . To be a friend to anyone who needs it.

> ALSO,,,,to forgive the " asses " if they are willing

> to treat you the way they should.

> Otherwise,,,,,,defend yourself.

> It's best to only have your family,,,than to have

> a bunch of " people " around who aren't in it for the

> long haul.

> WHY CAN'T EVERYONE DO THIS?????

> Think of the troubles that our kids wouldn't have

> if they knew they were accepted and that SOMEONE

> would want to hang with them.

> Ugh.

> Robin

>

> Haskin <babydoll_haskin@...> wrote:

> You said it perfectly: WHY CAN'T

> PARENTS TEACH THEIR KIDS TO BE NICE! Did you all

> see in the news last month about that lady whose

> daughter was bullying kids and for punishment she

> made her carry a sign saying I'M A BULLY! I wanted

> to contact her and thank her for being proactive

> about her daughters cruel actions. Some of my

> co-workers were talking about how " extreme " that

> punishment was and I said " clearly you don't have a

> child that has been bullied " . I don't think people

> understand just how devastating the behavior

> (bullying) is.

>

> and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs@...> wrote:

> I hear ya.

> Ian came back from the pool angry that other

> people kept taking the ball from him when he was

> playing catch with someone.

> I said, " hey....that's nice that others wanted to

> play though, right? "

> He said that they were taking the ball and

> basically " teasing " him and the other kid,,,,saying,

> " oh,,,,you want the ball? " and laughing.

> He's getting down about the whole thing.

> Why can't people teach their kids to be nice?

> Pisses me off.

> I want to always be " right there " to ward off the

> bullies.....to let them SEE that I'm right there as

> to not mess with him,,,,,,,,,,yet I feel like he's

> got to get used to this,,,,,,,ya know?

> Doesn't that sound horrible?

> If it was up to me,,,,,which,,,I know - it

> is,,,,,,,but if he didn't want to go over to the

> pool or want to be by others sometimes,,,,,he'd be

> better off. Or maybe it's ME who'd be better off?

> Breaks my heart.

> Little mean shits.

> Robin

>

> <hunebear3@...> wrote:

> Robin,

>

> Too bad... we would be a pretty good match too. Our

> kids are all

> pretty much the same age... except I have 3 children

> and you have 4!

> My daughters are 8 and 4!

>

> Oh well... we can still " talk " here! I think it's

> wonderful that I can

> see that there are other children out there that do

> the same thing as

> mine. It's hard sometimes to realize that he has a

> DX because he's so

> smart and other times I have a hard time believing

> that he really is

> 10.5 years old!

>

> I just picked him up from Summer Enrichment School

> and he was so

> agitated. Dodge Ball was the issue today! Seems that

> he was the

> target of some children's aggression, or at least in

> his eyes he was!

>

> Jackie

> On Jun 19, 2007, at 2:10 PM, and/or Robin Lemke

> wrote:

>

> > Hi.

> > We're in Wisconsin. Shoot. Oh well. hee hee.

> > Ian just turned 11 last month. (9 yr old

> daughter, 7 yr old son and 5

> > yr old daughter, too)

> > Robin

> >

> > wrote:

> >> I WISH!! I live in TN... not sure where you are!

> My son is 10.5...

> >> how old is yours?

> >>

> >> Every time I read a post that sounds like my

> situation... I

> >> think... " maybe they live near me " ! I know one

> thing this group is

> >> making me want to reach out to locals with AS and

> see what sort of

> >> support groups that I can find. I know there are

> several with in a 30

> >> minute drive! It would be " nice " to be with other

> families that have

> >> children just like mine... that would be treated

> " normally " ! I hate

> >> those awful stares at the grocery store when my

> son throws himself

> >> down

> >> on the floor OR is screeching at me about How I

> mistreat him and how

> >> he

> >> has an awful life and it's worthless! I told one

> woman that tried to

> >> help me with some " advice " to mind her own

> business and until she had

> >> walked a day in MY shoes to keep her mouth shut!

> That didn't go over

> >> too well either... but she did walk away! LOL

> >>

> >> Jackie

> >> On Jun 19, 2007, at 7:38 AM, and/or Robin

> Lemke wrote:

> >>

> >> > Oh Jackie.

> >> > PLEASE tell me that your son is about my son's

> age and that you live

> >> > near me!!!!!

> >> > Ha ha......sob.

> >> > Why can't any of us live near eachother?????

> >> > Robin

> >> >

> >> > wrote:

> >> >> Robin,

> >> >> Your son sounds like mine! If anyone

> touches/bumps him he yells

> >> that

> >> >> they hit him 100 times! He slumps over and

> acts like he just got

> >> the

> >> >> heck beat out of him. OMG let's talk about

> when he loses in a

> >> game...

> >> >> Same response as your son... " It's not fair, I

> don't want to play

> >> your

> >> >> stupid game anyway " . My son YES's me when we

> talk about the

> >> incidents

> >> >> after the fact. He's got his learned responses

> down... but doesn't

> >> >> understand WHY he's saying them!

> >> >>

> >> >> My son doesn't have any friends either! SO

> sad!

> >> >>

> >> >> Jackie

> >> >> On Jun 18, 2007, at 3:37 PM, and/or Robin

> Lemke wrote:

> >> >>

> >> >> > If my son and another kid go for a ball and

> God-forbid, my son

> >> >> doesn't

> >> >> > end up with it,,,,,or something just-as-bad

> - gets knocked over

> >> or

> >> >> > " touched " or hurt in any way, he's yelling

> that they hurt him and

> >> >> that

> >> >> > the game is stupid and starts to growl and

> his head sinks into

> >> his

> >> >> > shoulders.........it's awful.

> >> >> > We're really working on this now.....ugh.

> >> >> > As far as 4-square.......well,,,,,,,,,,it

> seems the boys will do

> >> the

> >> >> > different " passes " and make it hard for

> eachother and try to get

> >> >> > eachother " out " ....

> >> >> > Well,,,,,,Ian freaks when he gets

> out.......saying they aren't

> >> >> playing

> >> >> > fair. It's sad, actually.

> >> >> > He just does't " comprehend " AT THE TIME that

> THAT'S how the game

>

=== message truncated ===

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June 21, 2007

Pam,Be sure to visit the pygmy chimps. One day, during his senior year in high school, ds made a face at a pygmy chimp. One of the big daddies came over and tapped on the glass and showed his teeth. Okay, we got the message. Two weeks later, we came back. The same daddy chimp came back to the glass and made a face at !Have a great time. I just love the zoo. I usually get a membership and go t here just to walk.LizOn Jun 20, 2007, at 9:38 PM, ppanda65@... wrote:Liz, we will be there for a week (just dh and I). I am so looking forward to it. Will probably spend most of my time at the zoo visiting the pandas. Pam

June 21, 2007

So glad it went well. It's those incredible times that keep us going, isn't it? Robin <mysofas@...> wrote: My daughter is 6 and just started softball. Yesterday was their first game, I was a nervous wreck. Thinking if her team lost, it would be awful for her and she might get aggressive with the other team. Thank goodness they didn't keep score. She was asking me questions all day--about what would happen if she got 3 strikes--I told her that they didn't do strikes in HER game, she

had been watching baseball on tv. She did pretty well. She was the only one jumping up and down, mimicing hitting the ball--she wanted the person at bat to hurry up so she could run or catch the ball. And when she would get a run in, she would yell I got a homerun!!! LOL One thing happened that made my heart stop as I thought this is it, we are going to have to leave......she is really sensitive to laughing. Well her first time at bat, she walked up too quickly and the person placing the ball on the tee, hit her in the head with an elbow. EVERYONE laughed--on the field and off. She was so intent on hitting the ball that she didn't notice--didn't even look up when it happened. A big whew for me. (They wear helmets so she was fine) She got upset when she was on 3rd base and the other team got 3 of her teammates out, so it was time for her team to go

to the outfield, she was yelling but I haven't got a homerun yet!!! She had to be physically led away from 3rd base but she didn't meltdown. Oh and she kept running out to talk to the coaches ON The field when she was waiting on the sidelines for her turn to bat. She would raise her hand to speak. LOL The one thing she got from public school. <hunebear3comcast (DOT) net> wrote: It's so nice to be able to talk with other parents who have children that think JUST LIKE MINE! LOLJackieOn Jun 19, 2007, at 3:01 PM, LJL wrote:> Last year when Ethan was 8 he accused the person pitching the ball of> trying to get him out - this is coach pitched ball - so the coach was> actually on his

team. It did not make a difference to him. LOL.> >>> >>>> Robin,>>>> Too bad... we would be a pretty good match too. Our kids are all>> pretty much the same age... except I have 3 children and you have> 4!>> My daughters are 8 and 4!>>>> Oh well... we can still "talk" here! I think it's wonderful that I> can>> see that there are other children out there that do the same thing> as>> mine. It's hard sometimes to realize that he has a DX because he's> so>> smart and other times I have a hard time believing that he really> is>> 10.5 years old!>>>> I just picked him up from Summer Enrichment School and he was

so>> agitated. Dodge Ball was the issue today! Seems that he was the>> target of some children's aggression, or at least in his eyes he> was!>>>> Jackie>>>>>

June 21, 2007

Oh my gosh! My daughter was the EXACT same way with soccer at 5. She would chase the coach around trying to get him to help her get near the ball-LOL. She would storm off the field and rant and rave to me with all the other parents sitting there. She did get a goal once and she leapt so high in the air, but in the end it was way to stressful for me. I put her in gymnastics instead and she has done GREAT with that....you wouldn't even know she is different from the other kids whereas in soccer I felt like she stood out like a sore thumb. She is also sensitive to laughing and being talked about in any way....good or bad.

And if you need waterI'll Be A RiverLike a wave I will come over youYou need someone to fall intoI'll Be A RiverAnd my love will carry you through(I'll Be Your River)~cyndi lauper~

Re: ( ) Homeschooling ASpie kids

My daughter is 6 and just started softball. Yesterday was their first game, I was a nervous wreck. Thinking if her team lost, it would be awful for her and she might get aggressive with the other team. Thank goodness they didn't keep score. She was asking me questions all day--about what would happen if she got 3 strikes--I told her that they didn't do strikes in HER game, she had been watching baseball on tv.

She did pretty well. She was the only one jumping up and down, mimicing hitting the ball--she wanted the person at bat to hurry up so she could run or catch the ball. And when she would get a run in, she would yell I got a homerun!!! LOL

One thing happened that made my heart stop as I thought this is it, we are going to have to leave......she is really sensitive to laughing. Well her first time at bat, she walked up too quickly and the person placing the ball on the tee, hit her in the head with an elbow. EVERYONE laughed--on the field and off. She was so intent on hitting the ball that she didn't notice--didn't even look up when it happened. A big whew for me. (They wear helmets so she was fine)

She got upset when she was on 3rd base and the other team got 3 of her teammates out, so it was time for her team to go to the outfield, she was yelling but I haven't got a homerun yet!!! She had to be physically led away from 3rd base but she didn't meltdown.

Oh and she kept running out to talk to the coaches ON The field when she was waiting on the sidelines for her turn to bat. She would raise her hand to speak. LOL The one thing she got from public school.

<hunebear3comcast (DOT) net> wrote:

It's so nice to be able to talk with other parents who have children that think JUST LIKE MINE! LOLJackieOn Jun 19, 2007, at 3:01 PM, LJL wrote:> Last year when Ethan was 8 he accused the person pitching the ball of> trying to get him out - this is coach pitched ball - so the coach was> actually on his team. It did not make a difference to him. LOL.> >>> >>>> Robin,>>>> Too bad... we would be a pretty good match too. Our kids are all>> pretty much the same age... except I have 3 children and you have> 4!>> My daughters are 8 and 4!>>>> Oh well... we can still "talk" here! I think it's wonderful that I> can>> see that there are other children out there that do the same thing> as>> mine. It's hard sometimes to realize that he has a DX because he's> so>> smart and other times I have a hard time believing that he really> is>> 10.5 years old!>>>> I just picked him up from Summer Enrichment School and he was so>> agitated. Dodge Ball was the issue today! Seems that he was the>> target of some children's aggression, or at least in his eyes he> was!>>>> Jackie>>>>>

June 21, 2007

Yes, I am the only parent standing near the hole in the fence to make sure my daughter doesn't run out and into the road. She does keep running in and out to tell me something. I am sure everyone thinks it is because I am standing there but even when they are in the middle of the grass and I sit on the bleachers, she does the same thing. LOL They are told to go rest/get a drink in the dugout and she is the only one who runs to her mother. Usually to say did you see that? Or that BOY won't let me get the ballll!! (one of her mistakes that is making a child mad--the BOY isn't a boy!! It is a girl and I have told her this but she says well he LOOKS like a boy!!) I had a parent speak to me that I have seen in passing. We are new in town--been here only 6 months or so. So everyone is new to us basically. I had seen this parent and child in other activities but I have to be so close to my dd that I rarely get to speak to

anyone. Anyway she said she thought my dd was just shy and that is why I don't just drop her off as other parents do. So now that I realize most of these people don't understand or know about my dd, I have been talking to them at softball. They are so nice, and keep really bragging on dd and telling her what a good job she is doing. She is thrilled by the attention! As a single mom with no family in the area, I really worry about no male presence in her life. Well one of the dads patted her on the back and gave her a high 5 after the game, plus a new coach (a man) really took to dd after I told him that she wouldn't just be able to sit out in the dugout--she kept running out to the coaches. He started directing her to her spot, helping her, and praising her. Plus many of the parents esp. the louder dads, knowing that she has no one else at the game but me, was yelling out her name. She was so

proud! She is really sensitive around men and will strike out, I think b/c she has not been around men much at all. So this is good for her! My daughter didn't do well in gymnastics as she was afraid of flipping in any way shape or form, I thought it would help her but noooo. She is terrified to this day of being upside down or flipping over. She is so active, I thought it would be good for her. She did better at karate. I am on the lookout for a karate class in our new area now. I was against karate as she is so aggressive but they really stress self confidence and responsibility and calmness and so much more. Neylon <Lindee37@...> wrote: Oh my gosh! My daughter was the EXACT same way with soccer at 5. She would chase the coach around trying to get him to help her get near the ball-LOL. She would storm off the field and rant and rave to me with all the other parents sitting there. She did get a goal once and she leapt so high in the air, but in the end it was way to stressful for me. I put her in gymnastics instead and she has done GREAT with that....you wouldn't even know she is different from the other kids whereas in soccer I felt like she stood out like a sore thumb. She is also sensitive to laughing and being talked about in any way....good or bad. And if you need

waterI'll Be A RiverLike a wave I will come over youYou need someone to fall intoI'll Be A RiverAnd my love will carry you through(I'll Be Your River)~cyndi lauper~ Re: ( ) Homeschooling ASpie kids My daughter is 6 and just started softball. Yesterday was their first game, I was a nervous wreck.

Thinking if her team lost, it would be awful for her and she might get aggressive with the other team. Thank goodness they didn't keep score. She was asking me questions all day--about what would happen if she got 3 strikes--I told her that they didn't do strikes in HER game, she had been watching baseball on tv. She did pretty well. She was the only one jumping up and down, mimicing hitting the ball--she wanted the person at bat to hurry up so she could run or catch the ball. And when she would get a run in, she would yell I got a homerun!!! LOL One thing happened that made my heart stop as I thought this is it, we are going to have to leave......she is really sensitive to laughing. Well her first time at bat, she walked up too quickly and the person placing the ball on the tee, hit her in the head with an elbow. EVERYONE laughed--on the field and off. She was so intent on hitting the ball that she

didn't notice--didn't even look up when it happened. A big whew for me. (They wear helmets so she was fine) She got upset when she was on 3rd base and the other team got 3 of her teammates out, so it was time for her team to go to the outfield, she was yelling but I haven't got a homerun yet!!! She had to be physically led away from 3rd base but she didn't meltdown. Oh and she kept running out to talk to the coaches ON The field when she was waiting on the sidelines for her turn to bat. She would raise her hand to speak. LOL The one thing she got from public school. <hunebear3comcast (DOT) net> wrote: It's so nice to be able to talk with other parents who have

children that think JUST LIKE MINE! LOLJackieOn Jun 19, 2007, at 3:01 PM, LJL wrote:> Last year when Ethan was 8 he accused the person pitching the ball of> trying to get him out - this is coach pitched ball - so the coach was> actually on his team. It did not make a difference to him. LOL.> >>> >>>> Robin,>>>> Too bad... we would be a pretty good match too. Our kids are all>> pretty much the same age... except I have 3 children and you have> 4!>> My daughters are 8 and 4!>>>> Oh well... we can still "talk" here! I think it's wonderful that I> can>> see that there are other children out there that do the same thing>

as>> mine. It's hard sometimes to realize that he has a DX because he's> so>> smart and other times I have a hard time believing that he really> is>> 10.5 years old!>>>> I just picked him up from Summer Enrichment School and he was so>> agitated. Dodge Ball was the issue today! Seems that he was the>> target of some children's aggression, or at least in his eyes he> was!>>>> Jackie>>>>>

June 21, 2007

Kaye,

How sweet.. this made me cry!! If only everyone's children would grow

up as sweet, kind and respectful as your daughter! I strive to teach

this in my children, it's just too bad that not every one does! I'm so

proud of your daughter and most importantly YOU for instilling these

great values in her!

Jackie

On Jun 20, 2007, at 6:45 PM, Kaye Bates wrote:

> Can I tell you a true story about my 18 year old

> daughter, a? She's a plain old regular kid.

>

> Sometimes I wonder what it must be like to be the

> sibling of an AS child. But anyway...My Kris is a

> very compassionate girl. I think having a special

> little sister has made her very sensitive to other

> kids. She started visiting in the intensive support

> program at her high school when she had free time,

> just seeing if she could help out or something. There

> she met an autistic boy who was her age. He was not

> very verbal but obviously very bright. She noticed

> over the course of the year that he was very aware of

> the high school dances. He would say that he had

> invited a girlfriend and ordered a tux. One time he

> told Kris that he really wanted to learn how to dance.

> My daughter befriended this boy and taught him a few

> dance steps. She slowly, over time, became aware that

> his girlfriend was wishful thinking. One time she

> found him on the computer, looking up different styles

> of tuxedoes...looking up flowers...wishing so much

> that he could just go to a high school dance. This

> really got under the skin of my daughter. My kid is

> really not so much into these things, she could take

> them or leave them. One night she came and talked to

> me and my husband and asked, would it be ok if she

> asked this boy to her senior prom? She told us, it

> was really no big deal at all to her if she went...She

> started talking about all the things in her future

> that she will get to do. And she thought of this boy

> and how this was the one thing that meant ohhhhhhhh so

> much to him. How it was one stupid dance. That he

> would never get to have. So, Krissy asked him to the

> dance. My husband called his grandmother, who raises

> him, and asked if he could help Krissy take this boy

> to the prom. The grandma cried. She could not

> believe it. My daughter went shopping for a prom

> dress like any other senior in high school. She paid

> to have her hair and nails done. My husband got ahold

> of a fancy car and played chauffeur. Krissy pinned a

> flower on her date's lapel. He was so excited he was

> literally jumping up and down for joy. His desired

> dinner date was at a local pizza place. Not typical

> prom fare. However, my daughter said, this is about

> him. This is about giving him one special night that

> he can treasure. He was dressed to the nines in a

> tuxedo he chose himself. He went to the prom with my

> daughter. The teacher's assistant from his class was

> there in case he had any special needs that he would

> need help with. My daughter danced her prom night

> away with this very special young man. When they

> dropped him off, he hugged the life out of her and

> said..happy...happy...happy.... My husband made a

> video of the whole thing so he can watch it over and

> over. A lot of kids mocked and made fun of my

> daughter for doing this. Some of them even went so

> far as to try to trip this boy as he was dancing. My

> daughter faced every last one of them down. In fact,

> there were many kids that began to see, as the evening

> wore on, that you can get a lot of joy from making

> someone else happy. My daughter's friends also danced

> with her date. He was on cloud nine. At the end of

> the evening, I asked Kris...Are you glad you spent

> your prom this way? And she said, mom, there are

> different kinds of happy but I do believe this is the

> best happy you could ever get out of a stupid high

> school dance. And then she said, someday, my

> little sister will be old enough to have a prom.

> Maybe she won't care. But in the event she does...I

> am paying it forward in the hopes that some boy will

> care enough to make her as happy as I just did that

> boy tonight. And she went to bed. I could have

> cried. Sometimes your teenagers are so selfish and

> ratty but they do have their moments of magnificence.

> If only a few more kids could think this way.

>

> Kaye

> --- and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs@...> wrote:

>

>> You said it, woman!!!

>> Yep,,,I saw that story. I loved it too.

>> And you're right,,,,,those people who think it was

>> too extreme were never bullied and their kids either

>> aren't bullied or they don't know they are.

>> ***

>> Having all kids " fit in " is such a simple request.

>> It would be so easy to implement.

>> If my kids left others out or said something they

>> shouldn't to someone else, I'd be on them quicker

>> than,,,,,,,I don't know.

>> We've always taught them to defend the " one left

>> out " . To be a friend to anyone who needs it.

>> ALSO,,,,to forgive the " asses " if they are willing

>> to treat you the way they should.

>> Otherwise,,,,,,defend yourself.

>> It's best to only have your family,,,than to have

>> a bunch of " people " around who aren't in it for the

>> long haul.

>> WHY CAN'T EVERYONE DO THIS?????

>> Think of the troubles that our kids wouldn't have

>> if they knew they were accepted and that SOMEONE

>> would want to hang with them.

>> Ugh.

>> Robin

>>

>> Haskin <babydoll_haskin@...> wrote:

>> You said it perfectly: WHY CAN'T

>> PARENTS TEACH THEIR KIDS TO BE NICE! Did you all

>> see in the news last month about that lady whose

>> daughter was bullying kids and for punishment she

>> made her carry a sign saying I'M A BULLY! I wanted

>> to contact her and thank her for being proactive

>> about her daughters cruel actions. Some of my

>> co-workers were talking about how " extreme " that

>> punishment was and I said " clearly you don't have a

>> child that has been bullied " . I don't think people

>> understand just how devastating the behavior

>> (bullying) is.

>>

>> and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs@...> wrote:

>> I hear ya.

>> Ian came back from the pool angry that other

>> people kept taking the ball from him when he was

>> playing catch with someone.

>> I said, " hey....that's nice that others wanted to

>> play though, right? "

>> He said that they were taking the ball and

>> basically " teasing " him and the other kid,,,,saying,

>> " oh,,,,you want the ball? " and laughing.

>> He's getting down about the whole thing.

>> Why can't people teach their kids to be nice?

>> Pisses me off.

>> I want to always be " right there " to ward off the

>> bullies.....to let them SEE that I'm right there as

>> to not mess with him,,,,,,,,,,yet I feel like he's

>> got to get used to this,,,,,,,ya know?

>> Doesn't that sound horrible?

>> If it was up to me,,,,,which,,,I know - it

>> is,,,,,,,but if he didn't want to go over to the

>> pool or want to be by others sometimes,,,,,he'd be

>> better off. Or maybe it's ME who'd be better off?

>> Breaks my heart.

>> Little mean shits.

>> Robin

>>

>> <hunebear3@...> wrote:

>> Robin,

>>

>> Too bad... we would be a pretty good match too. Our

>> kids are all

>> pretty much the same age... except I have 3 children

>> and you have 4!

>> My daughters are 8 and 4!

>>

>> Oh well... we can still " talk " here! I think it's

>> wonderful that I can

>> see that there are other children out there that do

>> the same thing as

>> mine. It's hard sometimes to realize that he has a

>> DX because he's so

>> smart and other times I have a hard time believing

>> that he really is

>> 10.5 years old!

>>

>> I just picked him up from Summer Enrichment School

>> and he was so

>> agitated. Dodge Ball was the issue today! Seems that

>> he was the

>> target of some children's aggression, or at least in

>> his eyes he was!

>>

>> Jackie

>> On Jun 19, 2007, at 2:10 PM, and/or Robin Lemke

>> wrote:

>>

>>> Hi.

>>> We're in Wisconsin. Shoot. Oh well. hee hee.

>>> Ian just turned 11 last month. (9 yr old

>> daughter, 7 yr old son and 5

>>> yr old daughter, too)

>>> Robin

>>>

>>> wrote:

>>>> I WISH!! I live in TN... not sure where you are!

>> My son is 10.5...

>>>> how old is yours?

>>>>

>>>> Every time I read a post that sounds like my

>> situation... I

>>>> think... " maybe they live near me " ! I know one

>> thing this group is

>>>> making me want to reach out to locals with AS and

>> see what sort of

>>>> support groups that I can find. I know there are

>> several with in a 30

>>>> minute drive! It would be " nice " to be with other

>> families that have

>>>> children just like mine... that would be treated

>> " normally " ! I hate

>>>> those awful stares at the grocery store when my

>> son throws himself

>>>> down

>>>> on the floor OR is screeching at me about How I

>> mistreat him and how

>>>> he

>>>> has an awful life and it's worthless! I told one

>> woman that tried to

>>>> help me with some " advice " to mind her own

>> business and until she had

>>>> walked a day in MY shoes to keep her mouth shut!

>> That didn't go over

>>>> too well either... but she did walk away! LOL

>>>>

>>>> Jackie

>>>> On Jun 19, 2007, at 7:38 AM, and/or Robin

>> Lemke wrote:

>>>>

>>>>> Oh Jackie.

>>>>> PLEASE tell me that your son is about my son's

>> age and that you live

>>>>> near me!!!!!

>>>>> Ha ha......sob.

>>>>> Why can't any of us live near eachother?????

>>>>> Robin

>>>>>

>>>>> wrote:

>>>>>> Robin,

>>>>>> Your son sounds like mine! If anyone

>> touches/bumps him he yells

>>>> that

>>>>>> they hit him 100 times! He slumps over and

>> acts like he just got

>>>> the

>>>>>> heck beat out of him. OMG let's talk about

>> when he loses in a

>>>> game...

>>>>>> Same response as your son... " It's not fair, I

>> don't want to play

>>>> your

>>>>>> stupid game anyway " . My son YES's me when we

>> talk about the

>>>> incidents

>>>>>> after the fact. He's got his learned responses

>> down... but doesn't

>>>>>> understand WHY he's saying them!

>>>>>>

>>>>>> My son doesn't have any friends either! SO

>> sad!

>>>>>>

>>>>>> Jackie

>>>>>> On Jun 18, 2007, at 3:37 PM, and/or Robin

>> Lemke wrote:

>>>>>>

>>>>>>> If my son and another kid go for a ball and

>> God-forbid, my son

>>>>>> doesn't

>>>>>>> end up with it,,,,,or something just-as-bad

>> - gets knocked over

>>>> or

>>>>>>> " touched " or hurt in any way, he's yelling

>> that they hurt him and

>>>>>> that

>>>>>>> the game is stupid and starts to growl and

>> his head sinks into

>>>> his

>>>>>>> shoulders.........it's awful.

>>>>>>> We're really working on this now.....ugh.

>>>>>>> As far as 4-square.......well,,,,,,,,,,it

>> seems the boys will do

>>>> the

>>>>>>> different " passes " and make it hard for

>> eachother and try to get

>>>>>>> eachother " out " ....

>>>>>>> Well,,,,,,Ian freaks when he gets

>> out.......saying they aren't

>>>>>> playing

>>>>>>> fair. It's sad, actually.

>>>>>>> He just does't " comprehend " AT THE TIME that

>> THAT'S how the game

>>

> === message truncated ===

>

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June 21, 2007

Kaye, to me it sounds like your daughter is a product of a lovely

spirit combined with awesome parenting.

>

> Can I tell you a true story about my 18 year old

> daughter, a? She's a plain old regular kid.

>

June 21, 2007

Good Lord, Kaye. You're on a roll with the emails. I'm in tears. Your daughter deserves a car.......hee hee. You've done well. RobinKaye Bates <kcbates2003@...> wrote: Can I tell you a true story about my 18 year olddaughter, a? She's a plain old regular kid. :)Sometimes I wonder what it must be like to be thesibling of an AS child. But anyway...My Kris is avery compassionate girl. I think having a speciallittle

sister has made her very sensitive to otherkids. She started visiting in the intensive supportprogram at her high school when she had free time,just seeing if she could help out or something. Thereshe met an autistic boy who was her age. He was notvery verbal but obviously very bright. She noticedover the course of the year that he was very aware ofthe high school dances. He would say that he hadinvited a girlfriend and ordered a tux. One time hetold Kris that he really wanted to learn how to dance.My daughter befriended this boy and taught him a fewdance steps. She slowly, over time, became aware thathis girlfriend was wishful thinking. One time shefound him on the computer, looking up different stylesof tuxedoes...looking up flowers...wishing so muchthat he could just go to a high school dance. Thisreally got under the skin of my daughter. My kid isreally not so much into these things, she could

takethem or leave them. One night she came and talked tome and my husband and asked, would it be ok if sheasked this boy to her senior prom? She told us, itwas really no big deal at all to her if she went...Shestarted talking about all the things in her futurethat she will get to do. And she thought of this boyand how this was the one thing that meant ohhhhhhhh somuch to him. How it was one stupid dance. That hewould never get to have. So, Krissy asked him to thedance. My husband called his grandmother, who raiseshim, and asked if he could help Krissy take this boyto the prom. The grandma cried. She could notbelieve it. My daughter went shopping for a promdress like any other senior in high school. She paidto have her hair and nails done. My husband got aholdof a fancy car and played chauffeur. Krissy pinned aflower on her date's lapel. He was so excited he wasliterally jumping up and down for joy. His

desireddinner date was at a local pizza place. Not typicalprom fare. However, my daughter said, this is abouthim. This is about giving him one special night thathe can treasure. He was dressed to the nines in atuxedo he chose himself. He went to the prom with mydaughter. The teacher's assistant from his class wasthere in case he had any special needs that he wouldneed help with. My daughter danced her prom nightaway with this very special young man. When theydropped him off, he hugged the life out of her andsaid..happy...happy...happy.... My husband made avideo of the whole thing so he can watch it over andover. A lot of kids mocked and made fun of mydaughter for doing this. Some of them even went sofar as to try to trip this boy as he was dancing. Mydaughter faced every last one of them down. In fact,there were many kids that began to see, as the eveningwore on, that you can get a lot

of joy from makingsomeone else happy. My daughter's friends also dancedwith her date. He was on cloud nine. At the end ofthe evening, I asked Kris...Are you glad you spentyour prom this way? And she said, mom, there aredifferent kinds of happy but I do believe this is thebest happy you could ever get out of a stupid highschool dance. And then she said, someday, mylittle sister will be old enough to have a prom. Maybe she won't care. But in the event she does...Iam paying it forward in the hopes that some boy willcare enough to make her as happy as I just did thatboy tonight. And she went to bed. I could havecried. Sometimes your teenagers are so selfish andratty but they do have their moments of magnificence. If only a few more kids could think this way. Kaye--- and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs > wrote:> You said it,

woman!!!> Yep,,,I saw that story. I loved it too.> And you're right,,,,,those people who think it was> too extreme were never bullied and their kids either> aren't bullied or they don't know they are.> ***> Having all kids "fit in" is such a simple request.> It would be so easy to implement.> If my kids left others out or said something they> shouldn't to someone else, I'd be on them quicker> than,,,,,,,I don't know.> We've always taught them to defend the "one left> out". To be a friend to anyone who needs it. > ALSO,,,,to forgive the "asses" if they are willing> to treat you the way they should. > Otherwise,,,,,,defend yourself. > It's best to only have your family,,,than to have> a bunch of "people" around who aren't in it for the> long haul.> WHY CAN'T EVERYONE DO THIS?????> Think of the troubles that our kids wouldn't

have> if they knew they were accepted and that SOMEONE> would want to hang with them.> Ugh.> Robin> > Haskin <babydoll_haskin > wrote:> You said it perfectly: WHY CAN'T> PARENTS TEACH THEIR KIDS TO BE NICE! Did you all> see in the news last month about that lady whose> daughter was bullying kids and for punishment she> made her carry a sign saying I'M A BULLY! I wanted> to contact her and thank her for being proactive> about her daughters cruel actions. Some of my> co-workers were talking about how "extreme" that> punishment was and I said "clearly you don't have a> child that has been bullied". I don't think people> understand just how devastating the behavior> (bullying) is. > > and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs > wrote:> I hear ya.> Ian came back from the pool angry that other> people kept taking the ball from him when he was> playing catch with someone. > I said, "hey....that's nice that others wanted to> play though, right?"> He said that they were taking the ball and> basically "teasing" him and the other kid,,,,saying,> "oh,,,,you want the ball?" and laughing.> He's getting down about the whole thing. > Why can't people teach their kids to be nice? > Pisses me off.> I want to always be "right there" to ward off the> bullies.....to let them SEE that I'm right there as> to not mess with him,,,,,,,,,,yet I feel like he's> got to get used to this,,,,,,,ya know?> Doesn't that sound horrible? > If it was up to me,,,,,which,,,I know - it> is,,,,,,,but if he didn't want to

go over to the> pool or want to be by others sometimes,,,,,he'd be> better off. Or maybe it's ME who'd be better off?> Breaks my heart.> Little mean shits.> Robin> > <hunebear3comcast (DOT) net> wrote:> Robin,> > Too bad... we would be a pretty good match too. Our> kids are all > pretty much the same age... except I have 3 children> and you have 4! > My daughters are 8 and 4!> > Oh well... we can still "talk" here! I think it's> wonderful that I can > see that there are other children out there that do> the same thing as > mine. It's hard sometimes to realize that he has a> DX because he's so > smart and other times I have a hard time believing> that he really is > 10.5 years old!> > I just picked him up from Summer

Enrichment School> and he was so > agitated. Dodge Ball was the issue today! Seems that> he was the > target of some children's aggression, or at least in> his eyes he was!> > Jackie> On Jun 19, 2007, at 2:10 PM, and/or Robin Lemke> wrote:> > > Hi.> > We're in Wisconsin. Shoot. Oh well. hee hee.> > Ian just turned 11 last month. (9 yr old> daughter, 7 yr old son and 5 > > yr old daughter, too) > > Robin> >> >> > wrote:> >> I WISH!! I live in TN... not sure where you are!> My son is 10.5...> >> how old is yours?> >>> >> Every time I read a post that sounds like my> situation... I> >> think..."maybe they live near me"! I know one> thing this group is> >> making me want to reach out to locals with AS

and> see what sort of> >> support groups that I can find. I know there are> several with in a 30> >> minute drive! It would be "nice" to be with other> families that have> >> children just like mine... that would be treated> "normally"! I hate> >> those awful stares at the grocery store when my> son throws himself > >> down> >> on the floor OR is screeching at me about How I> mistreat him and how > >> he> >> has an awful life and it's worthless! I told one> woman that tried to> >> help me with some "advice" to mind her own> business and until she had> >> walked a day in MY shoes to keep her mouth shut!> That didn't go over> >> too well either... but she did walk away! LOL> >>> >> Jackie> >> On Jun 19, 2007, at 7:38 AM, and/or

Robin> Lemke wrote:> >>> >> > Oh Jackie.> >> > PLEASE tell me that your son is about my son's> age and that you live> >> > near me!!!!!> >> > Ha ha......sob.> >> > Why can't any of us live near eachother?????> >> > Robin> >> >> >> > wrote:> >> >> Robin,> >> >> Your son sounds like mine! If anyone> touches/bumps him he yells > >> that> >> >> they hit him 100 times! He slumps over and> acts like he just got > >> the> >> >> heck beat out of him. OMG let's talk about> when he loses in a > >> game...> >> >> Same response as your son... "It's not fair, I> don't want to play > >> your> >> >> stupid game anyway". My

son YES's me when we> talk about the > >> incidents> >> >> after the fact. He's got his learned responses> down... but doesn't> >> >> understand WHY he's saying them!> >> >>> >> >> My son doesn't have any friends either! SO> sad!> >> >>> >> >> Jackie> >> >> On Jun 18, 2007, at 3:37 PM, and/or Robin> Lemke wrote:> >> >>> >> >> > If my son and another kid go for a ball and> God-forbid, my son> >> >> doesn't> >> >> > end up with it,,,,,or something just-as-bad> - gets knocked over > >> or> >> >> > "touched" or hurt in any way, he's yelling> that they hurt him and> >> >> that> >> >> > the game is stupid and starts to growl

and> his head sinks into > >> his> >> >> > shoulders.........it's awful.> >> >> > We're really working on this now.....ugh.> >> >> > As far as 4-square.......well,,,,,,,,,,it> seems the boys will do > >> the> >> >> > different "passes" and make it hard for> eachother and try to get> >> >> > eachother "out"....> >> >> > Well,,,,,,Ian freaks when he gets> out.......saying they aren't> >> >> playing> >> >> > fair. It's sad, actually.> >> >> > He just does't "comprehend" AT THE TIME that> THAT'S how the game> === message truncated ===__________________________________________________________The fish are biting. Get more visitors on your site using

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June 21, 2007

Hi

I totally understand where you are coming from and did go through those situations with both of my twins which is why we ended up moving to a different school district so we could start over again. I can remember issues where my more severe son escaped from the school and they couldn't find him. One time they actually called me at home to find out if he was home with me. They did find him later on and he was in the process of walking home. At that time he was only 5 or 6 and didn't understand traffic safety so it was dangerous for him to be walking by himself. I found out later on that the janitor was actually lifting him off the floor and returning him to class when he fled from the class because he was upset. He has been dragged and held down too. I have picked him up from the school when they called me to come get him. By the time they decided to call me he was throwing furniture around the room.

So please hear me I do understand what you are talking about. His TA had no clue on how to deal with autism and only got him because of seniority. For our TAs seniority rules over experience, so you can lose your TA to someone else with no training in ASD but instead has more years at being a TA. The best you can do there is make a recommendation on a TA and hope they listen to you. Thankfully at least his TA was willing to learn but she had a hard time keeping up with our more severe son, and he would wear her out by the time his shortened day was done.

We have had the issues with our Speech & OT both going on leaves and being without services too. Plus a lot of services here are not available or must be paid for by the parents. We have a large group through our Autism Society that fought for ABA services for over 5 years and by the time the provincial government listened to us and implemented them they decided on an age limit of 6 and a lot of our kids were too old to take advantage of the new services, so most of us missed out.

I took serveral months and a lot of research to figure out where to move too in order to improve things for our 3 ASD children. It still isn't perfect for certain, but it is far far better than it was in the small town where we were originally living.

I am thrilled that homeschooling works so well for most of you. I think that when I realized I couldn't fall back on homeschooling my boys, that I pushed even harder to make public schooling work for my boys as it really needed to work. I didn't have any other choices to work with, and still don't. We have no special needs schools, all special needs children are mainstreamed and private schooling couldn't handle them either. My boys are so HF and so smart that I wanted them to get the best that they could with what I had available to work with. Public schooling was my last and only option left.

Marie

www.freedom4families.com

Re: ( ) Homeschooling ASpie kids

Marie, I am glad you found what worked best for your family too!

I also have no support generally and am a single mom. The schools that I have tried for my daughter think that I am nuts. LOL I have had to explain to every new therapist about my daughter and the issues she has--she does well in therapy 1:1 but can't do the same things in public/other venues. Seems every therapist she has had, went on leave for pregnancy or some other reason. Or we have moved hoping for a better school system. My friends disappeared quickly. My family has no clue and thinks I am just too overprotective and make excuses for bad behavior. The only support that I have IRL has been her specialists as they know high functioning autistic children and understand my daughter ...and they know I am not just nuts.

So many people (pediatricians/schools) have wanted to just medicate my daughter for ADHD which she does not have. To slow her down.

One thing that does make it easier is that I have only one child. I don't know if she would enjoy homeschooling as much if she had siblings. I think it would be harder to get her to work on anything. She loves to talk to children and will talk non-stop.

I found putting her in school much harder than homeschooling. I was worried constantly and didn't know what exactly was going on in school. My daughter couldn't tell me after the fact and her teachers downplayed or didn't notice much until she was totally out of control. I only knew from the teachers notes to me about how she had been disciplined repeatedly each day. I also sat in and watched classes and eventually withdrew her from what I saw.

IN the last school, I sat in on her last day there and saw how my daughter reacted to an Elmo Movie on fire safety. She covered her ears, moaning loudly, rocking, getting louder and more upset. I waited to see what the teacher/1:1 aide would do. They did nothing. So I removed my daughter from the room. The teacher and aide ran after us into the hall. I was asked what are you doing? She is missing fire safety! You can't take her. As if I was kidnapping my own child. I said she is upset and will meltdown if you don't remove her to a quieter place until the movie is over. They should know this from my talking to them prior and from their experieces with her. It seems they were only removing her after she got aggressive or totally out of control. Which was way too late as her day was ruined and she continued melting down all day. That was the day I decided to homeschool and stop trying to find the right school for her. Even with a 1:1 aide, they refused to do what is best for my daughter (and obviously they weren't listening to the one person who knew my child--me). Remove her to the special ed room for a bit until she calmed down.

My daughter loved going to school as there were children there. I just don't feel that it was the best placement for her as the adults didn't understand and weren't treating her well. They were only punishing her.

LJL <laura6307 > wrote:

I'm glad, and I do mean this sincerely, that you found what worked best for your family! > Does anyone homeschool an aspie child? I will be homeschooling one next > school year because the reg schools are not meeting his needs properly.> > Christian> > > > > > ------------------------------------------------------------> Building a website is a piece of cake. > Small Business gives you all the tools to get online. > > ------------------------------------------------------------> > No virus found in this incoming message.> Checked by AVG Free Edition. > Version: 7.5.472 / Virus Database: 269.9.0/851 - Release Date: 16/06/2007 12:50 PM> > > > > > ----------------------------------------------------------------> Be a better Heartthrob. Get better relationship answers from someone who knows.> Answers - Check it out. > > > > ----------------------------------------------------------------> > > No virus found in this incoming message.> Checked by AVG Free Edition. > Version: 7.5.472 / Virus Database: 269.9.0/852 - Release Date: 17/06/2007 8:23 AM> > > > > > > --------------------------------------------------------------------> > > No virus found in this incoming message.> Checked by AVG Free Edition. > Version: 7.5.472 / Virus Database: 269.9.1/854 - Release Date: 19/06/2007 1:12 PM>

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June 21, 2007

Christian Rooney <wcrooneyfl2000@ ...> wrote: > Does anyone home school an aspie child? I will be homeschooling one next > school year because the reg schools are not meeting his needs properly. Hi Christian, I home schooled our Aspie son for two years. The school he was in was simply unable to meet his needs. The goal was to address the issues ourselves to help him be comfortable in school. The advantage is that you are there for the social interaction with other children, along with the other parents for the most part. You can consider it one on one social tutoring. However, you have to cast a wide net...that means actively seeking out other home schoolers as well as numerous field trips. The homeschooling community is very diverse! You may even have to start your own group. We found that it worked very well for our family, and he is back in public school. That has been going pretty well, but we had to move...found a wonderful, wonderful school...and when they said they had zero tolerance for bullying, they meant it---it wasn't just printed in a handbook never to be followed. And his classroom teacher went out of her way to accomate his needs. You can be just as isolated socially in a large group (classroom) as compared to homeschooling. I think it's worse to be ostracized in the class group. Now, homeschooling is not perfect---but, you have the distinct advantage of being around to see what is really going on---as parents of Aspies we all know that our children are not always capable of communicating to us what's going on... Just remember that you will have to be very active socially. But don't sweat the school work---as I stated above, it is a very

diverse community, other homeschoolers are usually very welcoming and eager to help newbies...they have all sort of curriculum's, social events, and...opinions. You'll find those who are doing it temporarily, until their kids are in middle school, for religious reasons, for more family bonding... If it works for you, go for it. If it works for awhile, or doesn't work at all, you can always re-enroll your child in school. Be sure to check your states laws on it first though... http://www.hslda.org/laws/default.asp It's alot of work and you will come to appreciate all of the great teachers out there! Just look at it as creating your own charter school... PS: Our sons social life was much more active when we home schooled...

Moody friends. Drama queens. Your life? Nope! - their life, your story. Play Sims Stories at Games.

June 21, 2007

I have chills... Be proud of yourself for raising such a wonderful caring young lady! My prayer/dream is for my boys to find someone special and compassionate that can 'get through' the anxiety of my boys and find the real true, wonderful, funny, intelligent young men that they are with a few quirks... What a gem Kris is...I know you were overwhelmed with pride. If only there were more kids that took the "TIME" to try and get to know these magnificent kids...

Toni

Re: ( ) Homeschooling ASpie kids

Can I tell you a true story about my 18 year olddaughter, a? She's a plain old regular kid. :)Sometimes I wonder what it must be like to be thesibling of an AS child. But anyway...My Kris is avery compassionate girl. I think having a speciallittle sister has made her very sensitive to otherkids. She started visiting in the intensive supportprogram at her high school when she had free time,just seeing if she could help out or something. Thereshe met an autistic boy who was her age. He was notvery verbal but obviously very bright. She noticedover the course of the year that he was very aware ofthe high school dances. He would say that he hadinvited a girlfriend and ordered a tux. One time hetold Kris that he really wanted to learn how to dance.My daughter befriended this boy and taught him a fewdance steps. She slowly, over time, became aware thathis girlfriend was wishful thinking. One time shefound him on the computer, looking up different stylesof tuxedoes...looking up flowers...wishing so muchthat he could just go to a high school dance. Thisreally got under the skin of my daughter. My kid isreally not so much into these things, she could takethem or leave them. One night she came and talked tome and my husband and asked, would it be ok if sheasked this boy to her senior prom? She told us, itwas really no big deal at all to her if she went...Shestarted talking about all the things in her futurethat she will get to do. And she thought of this boyand how this was the one thing that meant ohhhhhhhh somuch to him. How it was one stupid dance. That hewould never get to have. So, Krissy asked him to thedance. My husband called his grandmother, who raiseshim, and asked if he could help Krissy take this boyto the prom. The grandma cried. She could notbelieve it. My daughter went shopping for a promdress like any other senior in high school. She paidto have her hair and nails done. My husband got aholdof a fancy car and played chauffeur. Krissy pinned aflower on her date's lapel. He was so excited he wasliterally jumping up and down for joy. His desireddinner date was at a local pizza place. Not typicalprom fare. However, my daughter said, this is abouthim. This is about giving him one special night thathe can treasure. He was dressed to the nines in atuxedo he chose himself. He went to the prom with mydaughter. The teacher's assistant from his class wasthere in case he had any special needs that he wouldneed help with. My daughter danced her prom nightaway with this very special young man. When theydropped him off, he hugged the life out of her andsaid..happy...happy...happy.... My husband made avideo of the whole thing so he can watch it over andover. A lot of kids mocked and made fun of mydaughter for doing this. Some of them even went sofar as to try to trip this boy as he was dancing. Mydaughter faced every last one of them down. In fact,there were many kids that began to see, as the eveningwore on, that you can get a lot of joy from makingsomeone else happy. My daughter's friends also dancedwith her date. He was on cloud nine. At the end ofthe evening, I asked Kris...Are you glad you spentyour prom this way? And she said, mom, there aredifferent kinds of happy but I do believe this is thebest happy you could ever get out of a stupid highschool dance. And then she said, someday, mylittle sister will be old enough to have a prom. Maybe she won't care. But in the event she does...Iam paying it forward in the hopes that some boy willcare enough to make her as happy as I just did thatboy tonight. And she went to bed. I could havecried. Sometimes your teenagers are so selfish andratty but they do have their moments of magnificence. If only a few more kids could think this way. Kaye--- and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs > wrote:> You said it, woman!!!> Yep,,,I saw that story. I loved it too.> And you're right,,,,,those people who think it was> too extreme were never bullied and their kids either> aren't bullied or they don't know they are.> ***> Having all kids "fit in" is such a simple request.> It would be so easy to implement.> If my kids left others out or said something they> shouldn't to someone else, I'd be on them quicker> than,,,,,,,I don't know.> We've always taught them to defend the "one left> out". To be a friend to anyone who needs it. > ALSO,,,,to forgive the "asses" if they are willing> to treat you the way they should. > Otherwise,,,,,,defend yourself. > It's best to only have your family,,,than to have> a bunch of "people" around who aren't in it for the> long haul.> WHY CAN'T EVERYONE DO THIS?????> Think of the troubles that our kids wouldn't have> if they knew they were accepted and that SOMEONE> would want to hang with them.> Ugh.> Robin> > Haskin <babydoll_haskin > wrote:> You said it perfectly: WHY CAN'T> PARENTS TEACH THEIR KIDS TO BE NICE! Did you all> see in the news last month about that lady whose> daughter was bullying kids and for punishment she> made her carry a sign saying I'M A BULLY! I wanted> to contact her and thank her for being proactive> about her daughters cruel actions. Some of my> co-workers were talking about how "extreme" that> punishment was and I said "clearly you don't have a> child that has been bullied". I don't think people> understand just how devastating the behavior> (bullying) is. > > and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs > wrote:> I hear ya.> Ian came back from the pool angry that other> people kept taking the ball from him when he was> playing catch with someone. > I said, "hey....that's nice that others wanted to> play though, right?"> He said that they were taking the ball and> basically "teasing" him and the other kid,,,,saying,> "oh,,,,you want the ball?" and laughing.> He's getting down about the whole thing. > Why can't people teach their kids to be nice? > Pisses me off.> I want to always be "right there" to ward off the> bullies.....to let them SEE that I'm right there as> to not mess with him,,,,,,,,,,yet I feel like he's> got to get used to this,,,,,,,ya know?> Doesn't that sound horrible? > If it was up to me,,,,,which,,,I know - it> is,,,,,,,but if he didn't want to go over to the> pool or want to be by others sometimes,,,,,he'd be> better off. Or maybe it's ME who'd be better off?> Breaks my heart.> Little mean shits.> Robin> > <hunebear3comcast (DOT) net> wrote:> Robin,> > Too bad... we would be a pretty good match too. Our> kids are all > pretty much the same age... except I have 3 children> and you have 4! > My daughters are 8 and 4!> > Oh well... we can still "talk" here! I think it's> wonderful that I can > see that there are other children out there that do> the same thing as > mine. It's hard sometimes to realize that he has a> DX because he's so > smart and other times I have a hard time believing> that he really is > 10.5 years old!> > I just picked him up from Summer Enrichment School> and he was so > agitated. Dodge Ball was the issue today! Seems that> he was the > target of some children's aggression, or at least in> his eyes he was!> > Jackie> On Jun 19, 2007, at 2:10 PM, and/or Robin Lemke> wrote:> > > Hi.> > We're in Wisconsin. Shoot. Oh well. hee hee.> > Ian just turned 11 last month. (9 yr old> daughter, 7 yr old son and 5 > > yr old daughter, too) > > Robin> >> >> > wrote:> >> I WISH!! I live in TN... not sure where you are!> My son is 10.5...> >> how old is yours?> >>> >> Every time I read a post that sounds like my> situation... I> >> think..."maybe they live near me"! I know one> thing this group is> >> making me want to reach out to locals with AS and> see what sort of> >> support groups that I can find. I know there are> several with in a 30> >> minute drive! It would be "nice" to be with other> families that have> >> children just like mine... that would be treated> "normally"! I hate> >> those awful stares at the grocery store when my> son throws himself > >> down> >> on the floor OR is screeching at me about How I> mistreat him and how > >> he> >> has an awful life and it's worthless! I told one> woman that tried to> >> help me with some "advice" to mind her own> business and until she had> >> walked a day in MY shoes to keep her mouth shut!> That didn't go over> >> too well either... but she did walk away! LOL> >>> >> Jackie> >> On Jun 19, 2007, at 7:38 AM, and/or Robin> Lemke wrote:> >>> >> > Oh Jackie.> >> > PLEASE tell me that your son is about my son's> age and that you live> >> > near me!!!!!> >> > Ha ha......sob.> >> > Why can't any of us live near eachother?????> >> > Robin> >> >> >> > wrote:> >> >> Robin,> >> >> Your son sounds like mine! If anyone> touches/bumps him he yells > >> that> >> >> they hit him 100 times! He slumps over and> acts like he just got > >> the> >> >> heck beat out of him. OMG let's talk about> when he loses in a > >> game...> >> >> Same response as your son... "It's not fair, I> don't want to play > >> your> >> >> stupid game anyway". My son YES's me when we> talk about the > >> incidents> >> >> after the fact. He's got his learned responses> down... but doesn't> >> >> understand WHY he's saying them!> >> >>> >> >> My son doesn't have any friends either! SO> sad!> >> >>> >> >> Jackie> >> >> On Jun 18, 2007, at 3:37 PM, and/or Robin> Lemke wrote:> >> >>> >> >> > If my son and another kid go for a ball and> God-forbid, my son> >> >> doesn't> >> >> > end up with it,,,,,or something just-as-bad> - gets knocked over > >> or> >> >> > "touched" or hurt in any way, he's yelling> that they hurt him and> >> >> that> >> >> > the game is stupid and starts to growl and> his head sinks into > >> his> >> >> > shoulders.........it's awful.> >> >> > We're really working on this now.....ugh.> >> >> > As far as 4-square.......well,,,,,,,,,,it> seems the boys will do > >> the> >> >> > different "passes" and make it hard for> eachother and try to get> >> >> > eachother "out"....> >> >> > Well,,,,,,Ian freaks when he gets> out.......saying they aren't> >> >> playing> >> >> > fair. It's sad, actually.> >> >> > He just does't "comprehend" AT THE TIME that> THAT'S how the game> === message truncated ===__________________________________________________________The fish are biting. Get more visitors on your site using Search Marketing.http://searchmarketing./arp/sponsoredsearch_v2.php

June 21, 2007

Oh my,

How wonderful,,,,you have raised a truly compassionate young woman!

- C.Mom to Cassie 16 PCOS, Austin 14 ADHD and a 3.5 HFA/AS & SPD/SID

Re: ( ) Homeschooling ASpie kids

Can I tell you a true story about my 18 year olddaughter, a? She's a plain old regular kid. :)Sometimes I wonder what it must be like to be thesibling of an AS child. But anyway...My Kris is avery compassionate girl. I think having a speciallittle sister has made her very sensitive to otherkids. She started visiting in the intensive supportprogram at her high school when she had free time,just seeing if she could help out or something. Thereshe met an autistic boy who was her age. He was notvery verbal but obviously very bright. She noticedover the course of the year that he was very aware ofthe high school dances. He would say that he hadinvited a girlfriend and ordered a tux. One time hetold Kris that he really wanted to learn how to dance.My daughter befriended this boy and taught him a fewdance steps. She slowly, over time, became aware thathis girlfriend was wishful thinking. One time shefound him on the computer, looking up different stylesof tuxedoes...looking up flowers...wishing so muchthat he could just go to a high school dance. Thisreally got under the skin of my daughter. My kid isreally not so much into these things, she could takethem or leave them. One night she came and talked tome and my husband and asked, would it be ok if sheasked this boy to her senior prom? She told us, itwas really no big deal at all to her if she went...Shestarted talking about all the things in her futurethat she will get to do. And she thought of this boyand how this was the one thing that meant ohhhhhhhh somuch to him. How it was one stupid dance. That hewould never get to have. So, Krissy asked him to thedance. My husband called his grandmother, who raiseshim, and asked if he could help Krissy take this boyto the prom. The grandma cried. She could notbelieve it. My daughter went shopping for a promdress like any other senior in high school. She paidto have her hair and nails done. My husband got aholdof a fancy car and played chauffeur. Krissy pinned aflower on her date's lapel. He was so excited he wasliterally jumping up and down for joy. His desireddinner date was at a local pizza place. Not typicalprom fare. However, my daughter said, this is abouthim. This is about giving him one special night thathe can treasure. He was dressed to the nines in atuxedo he chose himself. He went to the prom with mydaughter. The teacher's assistant from his class wasthere in case he had any special needs that he wouldneed help with. My daughter danced her prom nightaway with this very special young man. When theydropped him off, he hugged the life out of her andsaid..happy...happy...happy.... My husband made avideo of the whole thing so he can watch it over andover. A lot of kids mocked and made fun of mydaughter for doing this. Some of them even went sofar as to try to trip this boy as he was dancing. Mydaughter faced every last one of them down. In fact,there were many kids that began to see, as the eveningwore on, that you can get a lot of joy from makingsomeone else happy. My daughter's friends also dancedwith her date. He was on cloud nine. At the end ofthe evening, I asked Kris...Are you glad you spentyour prom this way? And she said, mom, there aredifferent kinds of happy but I do believe this is thebest happy you could ever get out of a stupid highschool dance. And then she said, someday, mylittle sister will be old enough to have a prom. Maybe she won't care. But in the event she does...Iam paying it forward in the hopes that some boy willcare enough to make her as happy as I just did thatboy tonight. And she went to bed. I could havecried. Sometimes your teenagers are so selfish andratty but they do have their moments of magnificence. If only a few more kids could think this way. Kaye--- and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs > wrote:> You said it, woman!!!> Yep,,,I saw that story. I loved it too.> And you're right,,,,,those people who think it was> too extreme were never bullied and their kids either> aren't bullied or they don't know they are.> ***> Having all kids "fit in" is such a simple request.> It would be so easy to implement.> If my kids left others out or said something they> shouldn't to someone else, I'd be on them quicker> than,,,,,,,I don't know.> We've always taught them to defend the "one left> out". To be a friend to anyone who needs it. > ALSO,,,,to forgive the "asses" if they are willing> to treat you the way they should. > Otherwise,,,,,,defend yourself. > It's best to only have your family,,,than to have> a bunch of "people" around who aren't in it for the> long haul.> WHY CAN'T EVERYONE DO THIS?????> Think of the troubles that our kids wouldn't have> if they knew they were accepted and that SOMEONE> would want to hang with them.> Ugh.> Robin> > Haskin <babydoll_haskin > wrote:> You said it perfectly: WHY CAN'T> PARENTS TEACH THEIR KIDS TO BE NICE! Did you all> see in the news last month about that lady whose> daughter was bullying kids and for punishment she> made her carry a sign saying I'M A BULLY! I wanted> to contact her and thank her for being proactive> about her daughters cruel actions. Some of my> co-workers were talking about how "extreme" that> punishment was and I said "clearly you don't have a> child that has been bullied". I don't think people> understand just how devastating the behavior> (bullying) is. > > and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs > wrote:> I hear ya.> Ian came back from the pool angry that other> people kept taking the ball from him when he was> playing catch with someone. > I said, "hey....that's nice that others wanted to> play though, right?"> He said that they were taking the ball and> basically "teasing" him and the other kid,,,,saying,> "oh,,,,you want the ball?" and laughing.> He's getting down about the whole thing. > Why can't people teach their kids to be nice? > Pisses me off.> I want to always be "right there" to ward off the> bullies.....to let them SEE that I'm right there as> to not mess with him,,,,,,,,,,yet I feel like he's> got to get used to this,,,,,,,ya know?> Doesn't that sound horrible? > If it was up to me,,,,,which,,,I know - it> is,,,,,,,but if he didn't want to go over to the> pool or want to be by others sometimes,,,,,he'd be> better off. Or maybe it's ME who'd be better off?> Breaks my heart.> Little mean shits.> Robin> > <hunebear3comcast (DOT) net> wrote:> Robin,> > Too bad... we would be a pretty good match too. Our> kids are all > pretty much the same age... except I have 3 children> and you have 4! > My daughters are 8 and 4!> > Oh well... we can still "talk" here! I think it's> wonderful that I can > see that there are other children out there that do> the same thing as > mine. It's hard sometimes to realize that he has a> DX because he's so > smart and other times I have a hard time believing> that he really is > 10.5 years old!> > I just picked him up from Summer Enrichment School> and he was so > agitated. Dodge Ball was the issue today! Seems that> he was the > target of some children's aggression, or at least in> his eyes he was!> > Jackie> On Jun 19, 2007, at 2:10 PM, and/or Robin Lemke> wrote:> > > Hi.> > We're in Wisconsin. Shoot. Oh well. hee hee.> > Ian just turned 11 last month. (9 yr old> daughter, 7 yr old son and 5 > > yr old daughter, too) > > Robin> >> >> > wrote:> >> I WISH!! I live in TN... not sure where you are!> My son is 10.5...> >> how old is yours?> >>> >> Every time I read a post that sounds like my> situation... I> >> think..."maybe they live near me"! I know one> thing this group is> >> making me want to reach out to locals with AS and> see what sort of> >> support groups that I can find. I know there are> several with in a 30> >> minute drive! It would be "nice" to be with other> families that have> >> children just like mine... that would be treated> "normally"! I hate> >> those awful stares at the grocery store when my> son throws himself > >> down> >> on the floor OR is screeching at me about How I> mistreat him and how > >> he> >> has an awful life and it's worthless! I told one> woman that tried to> >> help me with some "advice" to mind her own> business and until she had> >> walked a day in MY shoes to keep her mouth shut!> That didn't go over> >> too well either... but she did walk away! LOL> >>> >> Jackie> >> On Jun 19, 2007, at 7:38 AM, and/or Robin> Lemke wrote:> >>> >> > Oh Jackie.> >> > PLEASE tell me that your son is about my son's> age and that you live> >> > near me!!!!!> >> > Ha ha......sob.> >> > Why can't any of us live near eachother?????> >> > Robin> >> >> >> > wrote:> >> >> Robin,> >> >> Your son sounds like mine! If anyone> touches/bumps him he yells > >> that> >> >> they hit him 100 times! He slumps over and> acts like he just got > >> the> >> >> heck beat out of him. OMG let's talk about> when he loses in a > >> game...> >> >> Same response as your son... "It's not fair, I> don't want to play > >> your> >> >> stupid game anyway". My son YES's me when we> talk about the > >> incidents> >> >> after the fact. He's got his learned responses> down... but doesn't> >> >> understand WHY he's saying them!> >> >>> >> >> My son doesn't have any friends either! SO> sad!> >> >>> >> >> Jackie> >> >> On Jun 18, 2007, at 3:37 PM, and/or Robin> Lemke wrote:> >> >>> >> >> > If my son and another kid go for a ball and> God-forbid, my son> >> >> doesn't> >> >> > end up with it,,,,,or something just-as-bad> - gets knocked over > >> or> >> >> > "touched" or hurt in any way, he's yelling> that they hurt him and> >> >> that> >> >> > the game is stupid and starts to growl and> his head sinks into > >> his> >> >> > shoulders.........it's awful.> >> >> > We're really working on this now.....ugh.> >> >> > As far as 4-square.......well,,,,,,,,,,it> seems the boys will do > >> the> >> >> > different "passes" and make it hard for> eachother and try to get> >> >> > eachother "out"....> >> >> > Well,,,,,,Ian freaks when he gets> out.......saying they aren't> >> >> playing> >> >> > fair. It's sad, actually.> >> >> > He just does't "comprehend" AT THE TIME that> THAT'S how the game> === message truncated ===__________________________________________________________The fish are biting. Get more visitors on your site using Search Marketing.http://searchmarketing./arp/sponsoredsearch_v2.php

June 21, 2007

Blah! (me crying). Beautiful story, beautiful child. God bless you!Kaye Bates <kcbates2003@...> wrote: Can I tell you a true story about my 18 year olddaughter, a? She's a plain old regular kid. :)Sometimes I wonder what it must be like to be thesibling of an AS child. But anyway...My Kris is avery compassionate girl. I think having a speciallittle sister has made her very sensitive to otherkids. She started visiting in the intensive supportprogram at her high

school when she had free time,just seeing if she could help out or something. Thereshe met an autistic boy who was her age. He was notvery verbal but obviously very bright. She noticedover the course of the year that he was very aware ofthe high school dances. He would say that he hadinvited a girlfriend and ordered a tux. One time hetold Kris that he really wanted to learn how to dance.My daughter befriended this boy and taught him a fewdance steps. She slowly, over time, became aware thathis girlfriend was wishful thinking. One time shefound him on the computer, looking up different stylesof tuxedoes...looking up flowers...wishing so muchthat he could just go to a high school dance. Thisreally got under the skin of my daughter. My kid isreally not so much into these things, she could takethem or leave them. One night she came and talked tome and my husband and asked, would it be ok if sheasked this

boy to her senior prom? She told us, itwas really no big deal at all to her if she went...Shestarted talking about all the things in her futurethat she will get to do. And she thought of this boyand how this was the one thing that meant ohhhhhhhh somuch to him. How it was one stupid dance. That hewould never get to have. So, Krissy asked him to thedance. My husband called his grandmother, who raiseshim, and asked if he could help Krissy take this boyto the prom. The grandma cried. She could notbelieve it. My daughter went shopping for a promdress like any other senior in high school. She paidto have her hair and nails done. My husband got aholdof a fancy car and played chauffeur. Krissy pinned aflower on her date's lapel. He was so excited he wasliterally jumping up and down for joy. His desireddinner date was at a local pizza place. Not typicalprom fare. However, my daughter said, this is abouthim.

This is about giving him one special night thathe can treasure. He was dressed to the nines in atuxedo he chose himself. He went to the prom with mydaughter. The teacher's assistant from his class wasthere in case he had any special needs that he wouldneed help with. My daughter danced her prom nightaway with this very special young man. When theydropped him off, he hugged the life out of her andsaid..happy...happy...happy.... My husband made avideo of the whole thing so he can watch it over andover. A lot of kids mocked and made fun of mydaughter for doing this. Some of them even went sofar as to try to trip this boy as he was dancing. Mydaughter faced every last one of them down. In fact,there were many kids that began to see, as the eveningwore on, that you can get a lot of joy from makingsomeone else happy. My daughter's friends also dancedwith her date. He was on cloud nine. At the

end ofthe evening, I asked Kris...Are you glad you spentyour prom this way? And she said, mom, there aredifferent kinds of happy but I do believe this is thebest happy you could ever get out of a stupid highschool dance. And then she said, someday, mylittle sister will be old enough to have a prom. Maybe she won't care. But in the event she does...Iam paying it forward in the hopes that some boy willcare enough to make her as happy as I just did thatboy tonight. And she went to bed. I could havecried. Sometimes your teenagers are so selfish andratty but they do have their moments of magnificence. If only a few more kids could think this way. Kaye--- and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs > wrote:> You said it, woman!!!> Yep,,,I saw that story. I loved it too.> And you're right,,,,,those people who think it was> too

extreme were never bullied and their kids either> aren't bullied or they don't know they are.> ***> Having all kids "fit in" is such a simple request.> It would be so easy to implement.> If my kids left others out or said something they> shouldn't to someone else, I'd be on them quicker> than,,,,,,,I don't know.> We've always taught them to defend the "one left> out". To be a friend to anyone who needs it. > ALSO,,,,to forgive the "asses" if they are willing> to treat you the way they should. > Otherwise,,,,,,defend yourself. > It's best to only have your family,,,than to have> a bunch of "people" around who aren't in it for the> long haul.> WHY CAN'T EVERYONE DO THIS?????> Think of the troubles that our kids wouldn't have> if they knew they were accepted and that SOMEONE> would want to hang with them.> Ugh.> Robin>

> Haskin <babydoll_haskin > wrote:> You said it perfectly: WHY CAN'T> PARENTS TEACH THEIR KIDS TO BE NICE! Did you all> see in the news last month about that lady whose> daughter was bullying kids and for punishment she> made her carry a sign saying I'M A BULLY! I wanted> to contact her and thank her for being proactive> about her daughters cruel actions. Some of my> co-workers were talking about how "extreme" that> punishment was and I said "clearly you don't have a> child that has been bullied". I don't think people> understand just how devastating the behavior> (bullying) is. > > and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs > wrote:> I hear ya.> Ian came back from the pool angry that other> people kept taking the ball from

him when he was> playing catch with someone. > I said, "hey....that's nice that others wanted to> play though, right?"> He said that they were taking the ball and> basically "teasing" him and the other kid,,,,saying,> "oh,,,,you want the ball?" and laughing.> He's getting down about the whole thing. > Why can't people teach their kids to be nice? > Pisses me off.> I want to always be "right there" to ward off the> bullies.....to let them SEE that I'm right there as> to not mess with him,,,,,,,,,,yet I feel like he's> got to get used to this,,,,,,,ya know?> Doesn't that sound horrible? > If it was up to me,,,,,which,,,I know - it> is,,,,,,,but if he didn't want to go over to the> pool or want to be by others sometimes,,,,,he'd be> better off. Or maybe it's ME who'd be better off?> Breaks my heart.> Little mean

shits.> Robin> > <hunebear3comcast (DOT) net> wrote:> Robin,> > Too bad... we would be a pretty good match too. Our> kids are all > pretty much the same age... except I have 3 children> and you have 4! > My daughters are 8 and 4!> > Oh well... we can still "talk" here! I think it's> wonderful that I can > see that there are other children out there that do> the same thing as > mine. It's hard sometimes to realize that he has a> DX because he's so > smart and other times I have a hard time believing> that he really is > 10.5 years old!> > I just picked him up from Summer Enrichment School> and he was so > agitated. Dodge Ball was the issue today! Seems that> he was the > target of some children's aggression, or at least

in> his eyes he was!> > Jackie> On Jun 19, 2007, at 2:10 PM, and/or Robin Lemke> wrote:> > > Hi.> > We're in Wisconsin. Shoot. Oh well. hee hee.> > Ian just turned 11 last month. (9 yr old> daughter, 7 yr old son and 5 > > yr old daughter, too) > > Robin> >> >> > wrote:> >> I WISH!! I live in TN... not sure where you are!> My son is 10.5...> >> how old is yours?> >>> >> Every time I read a post that sounds like my> situation... I> >> think..."maybe they live near me"! I know one> thing this group is> >> making me want to reach out to locals with AS and> see what sort of> >> support groups that I can find. I know there are> several with in a 30> >> minute drive! It would be "nice" to be

with other> families that have> >> children just like mine... that would be treated> "normally"! I hate> >> those awful stares at the grocery store when my> son throws himself > >> down> >> on the floor OR is screeching at me about How I> mistreat him and how > >> he> >> has an awful life and it's worthless! I told one> woman that tried to> >> help me with some "advice" to mind her own> business and until she had> >> walked a day in MY shoes to keep her mouth shut!> That didn't go over> >> too well either... but she did walk away! LOL> >>> >> Jackie> >> On Jun 19, 2007, at 7:38 AM, and/or Robin> Lemke wrote:> >>> >> > Oh Jackie.> >> > PLEASE tell me that your son is about my son's> age and that you

live> >> > near me!!!!!> >> > Ha ha......sob.> >> > Why can't any of us live near eachother?????> >> > Robin> >> >> >> > wrote:> >> >> Robin,> >> >> Your son sounds like mine! If anyone> touches/bumps him he yells > >> that> >> >> they hit him 100 times! He slumps over and> acts like he just got > >> the> >> >> heck beat out of him. OMG let's talk about> when he loses in a > >> game...> >> >> Same response as your son... "It's not fair, I> don't want to play > >> your> >> >> stupid game anyway". My son YES's me when we> talk about the > >> incidents> >> >> after the fact. He's got his learned responses> down... but

doesn't> >> >> understand WHY he's saying them!> >> >>> >> >> My son doesn't have any friends either! SO> sad!> >> >>> >> >> Jackie> >> >> On Jun 18, 2007, at 3:37 PM, and/or Robin> Lemke wrote:> >> >>> >> >> > If my son and another kid go for a ball and> God-forbid, my son> >> >> doesn't> >> >> > end up with it,,,,,or something just-as-bad> - gets knocked over > >> or> >> >> > "touched" or hurt in any way, he's yelling> that they hurt him and> >> >> that> >> >> > the game is stupid and starts to growl and> his head sinks into > >> his> >> >> > shoulders.........it's awful.> >> >> > We're

really working on this now.....ugh.> >> >> > As far as 4-square.......well,,,,,,,,,,it> seems the boys will do > >> the> >> >> > different "passes" and make it hard for> eachother and try to get> >> >> > eachother "out"....> >> >> > Well,,,,,,Ian freaks when he gets> out.......saying they aren't> >> >> playing> >> >> > fair. It's sad, actually.> >> >> > He just does't "comprehend" AT THE TIME that> THAT'S how the game> === message truncated ===__________________________________________________________The fish are biting. Get more visitors on your site using Search Marketing.http://searchmarketing./arp/sponsoredsearch_v2.php

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June 21, 2007

Apparently, my own public school system has a wonderful program for AS kids as well. I keep reading about it anyway. lol

RoxannaAutism Happens

Re: ( ) Homeschooling ASpie kids

Some public schools have great programs for kids with AS. It's not always easy to find them. San Diego Unified School District has a great program at the elementary and middle school levels, but we had to go to due process to get it. Lots of teachers (inclluding special ed teachers) don't even know it's there.

Liz

On Jun 18, 2007, at 3:40 PM, ACuitinoaol wrote:

I would add that you should find a private and small class size school. I really believe that a public school setting may be damaging for Aspie children. They need a nurturing environment at least until they complete high school and they have more tools to survive in a normal educational setting.

June 21, 2007

ROFL. Oh yeah. I wish I could farm it and send it out! It is realllllly scary. I used to recite a line of poetry to remind me to not go crazy - "Faith - from the book Livingston Seagull by Bach

When you have come to the edge of all that you knowand are about to step off into the darkness,FAITH is knowing one of two things will happen:There will be something solid to stand on,or you will be taught to fly. "

RoxannaAutism Happens

Re: ( ) Homeschooling ASpie kids

Roxanna, want to send a little faith and my way. Pam

See what's free at AOL.com.

June 21, 2007

Well, I think in many places, this is standard for gifted programming. First they do the regular work, then they get to do the above level work. There is some crazy idea that gifted means doing MORE and not DIFFERENT. My own ds balks at it. He has always tested out of chapters in math class but still has to do them. That doesn't make sense. Then he gets poor grades in math because he has trouble staying organized and turning papers in. Makes me nuts, thank goodness this year is over!

RoxannaAutism Happens

Re: ( ) Homeschooling ASpie kids

This is the craziest stuff I have ever heard! Teachers are SUPPOSED to assess children before theystart teaching them and TEACH THEM AT THEIR LEVEL!!!! General ed or special ed, it doesn't matter, this iswhat good teachers do. It is nuts to make a child dotons of work on a level way below their ability. Iassess them before we start, every two weeks to makesure we are making progress, and at the end to see howfar we went! There is not even a general ed classthat has all students on the same level (unless theypreviously tested them and then grouped them accordingto level!) WHAT IN THE WORLD ARE THEY DOING TO YOUR KID?????I would go crazy too if it was me! I feel so sorryfor them!Kaye--- and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs > wrote:> Hi.> My son was given the "right" to do extra work> AFTER HIS GRADE-LEVEL work was done, too. He got so> bored and mad that he had to do double the work. At> first, we were all trying to figure out why he was> getting so mad (and why he would simply shut down> and suddenly wouldn't do either> work),,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,then it "dawned" on me and we> chatted with the teacher.> What they decided was that if he coud do the> end-of-chapter "review".............(usually> 1sheet/2sheets),,,,,then he would simply do "his> level" when everyone else did "their level".> ------------------------------> > He's always had a rough time with writing as well.> He presses so hard that sometimes the sheets would> rip.> He received OT and was told he could do anything> that required writing, on a computer.> They did let him have an Alpha Smart at> school,,,,,,but it seemed too hard to actually> quickly SEE what he was doing. > Sometimes, the room "helper" would write what he> said for him. I did this at home for him, too.> They weren't saying that he didn't have to learn> how to write,,,,,,,,,,,he did have to....and they> worked on his sensory issues with the> pressure,,,,,,but they also acknowledged that it was> rough for him.> (One of my things to try to get him to be aware of> his "grip and pressure" was to always find new and> cool pencils. This thrilled him..........probably> too much, though,,,,,,,,cause he would be mesmerized> if there was a new feel/design........hee hee. > Sigh.> Oh - and I'm no expert,,,,,,,,,,,but,,,,,,,,,since> he's basically doing double the work(at> home?),,,,,,,,,could you have him do "his level"> work and if things are going good once that's done,> perhaps have him try the "boring" stuff? That way,> if he doesn't do it both, at least he's proven that> he grasps where his level is at. ???? Then, explain> to the teacher (if it didn't all get done) that it> just isn't fair for him to have double). Explain> that "gifted" doesn't mean "want more> work",,,,,,,,,,, > I just remember the boredom and anger my son had> with the "boring" work. Makes me sad for him when I> think about how long he had to do both.> Good luck.> Robin> > <hunebear3comcast (DOT) net> wrote:> ,> > Yes.. the school makes him do rewrites... I'm guilty> of it myself > BEFORE I knew of the AS! I'm going to ask for a> dysgraphia evaluation! > We'll see out that goes. likes his gifted> class, but I'm sure > he would love to go even further! He's in the 4th> grade but functions > academically on a 6-7 grade level. So there's only> so much he can do > in the public school system. I also feel that he is> being "punished" > because he can not have enrichment work until he> completes the current > grade work. He feels this is a waste of his time and> gets days behind > and loses recess(which he could really care less> about)or the send him > to the library... which he LOVES! He usually gets> good grades but > HATES all of the homework that he has to do. It's> such a battle to get > him to do the homework. Sometimes I physically have> to hold him at the > table... which I hate to do!> > As for hating writing... he has always disliked. He> has a bad pencil > grip and I was told by the school OT that it was too> late to change it. > I have been trying to get this corrected since first> grade... bad > experience there!> > I'm learning so much for you guys! Glad that I found> this group.> > Jackie> On Jun 18, 2007, at 2:32 PM, LJL wrote:> > > Everybody uses something different. My second son> (not diagnosed on> > the spectrum) was evaluated as gifted. It's nice> to allow him to go> > as far forward as he needs. His 'gifted' class was> doing nothing for> > him academically.> >> > Even if you stay in the school, I would ask that> the school stop> > making him do so many rewrites - which is my> 'guess' as to why your> > son hates to write so much.> >> > > >> >> >> > > >> >> >> >> >

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Re: Homeschooling ASpie kids

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