Re: Homeschooling ASpie kids

June 21, 2007

OMG, I cried when I read this. I am sure you are soooooo proud

of her and you should be. She should also be proud of herself! What a neat

kid.

From:

[mailto: ] On

Behalf Of Haskin

Sent: Thursday, June 21, 2007 12:18 PM

Subject: Re: ( ) Homeschooling ASpie kids

Blah! (me crying). Beautiful story, beautiful child. God

bless you!

Kaye Bates <kcbates2003@...> wrote:

Can I tell you a true story about my 18 year old

daughter, a? She's a plain old regular kid.

Sometimes I wonder what it must be like to be the

sibling of an AS child. But anyway...My Kris is a

very compassionate girl. I think having a special

little sister has made her very sensitive to other

kids. She started visiting in the intensive support

program at her high school when she had free time,

just seeing if she could help out or something. There

she met an autistic boy who was her age. He was not

very verbal but obviously very bright. She noticed

over the course of the year that he was very aware of

the high school dances. He would say that he had

invited a girlfriend and ordered a tux. One time he

told Kris that he really wanted to learn how to dance.

My daughter befriended this boy and taught him a few

dance steps. She slowly, over time, became aware that

his girlfriend was wishful thinking. One time she

found him on the computer, looking up different styles

of tuxedoes...looking up flowers...wishing so much

that he could just go to a high school dance. This

really got under the skin of my daughter. My kid is

really not so much into these things, she could take

them or leave them. One night she came and talked to

me and my husband and asked, would it be ok if she

asked this boy to her senior prom? She told us, it

was really no big deal at all to her if she went...She

started talking about all the things in her future

that she will get to do. And she thought of this boy

and how this was the one thing that meant ohhhhhhhh so

much to him. How it was one stupid dance. That he

would never get to have. So, Krissy asked him to the

dance. My husband called his grandmother, who raises

him, and asked if he could help Krissy take this boy

to the prom. The grandma cried. She could not

believe it. My daughter went shopping for a prom

dress like any other senior in high school. She paid

to have her hair and nails done. My husband got ahold

of a fancy car and played chauffeur. Krissy pinned a

flower on her date's lapel. He was so excited he was

literally jumping up and down for joy. His desired

dinner date was at a local pizza place. Not typical

prom fare. However, my daughter said, this is about

him. This is about giving him one special night that

he can treasure. He was dressed to the nines in a

tuxedo he chose himself. He went to the prom with my

daughter. The teacher's assistant from his class was

there in case he had any special needs that he would

need help with. My daughter danced her prom night

away with this very special young man. When they

dropped him off, he hugged the life out of her and

said..happy...happy...happy.... My husband made a

video of the whole thing so he can watch it over and

over. A lot of kids mocked and made fun of my

daughter for doing this. Some of them even went so

far as to try to trip this boy as he was dancing. My

daughter faced every last one of them down. In fact,

there were many kids that began to see, as the evening

wore on, that you can get a lot of joy from making

someone else happy. My daughter's friends also danced

with her date. He was on cloud nine. At the end of

the evening, I asked Kris...Are you glad you spent

your prom this way? And she said, mom, there are

different kinds of happy but I do believe this is the

best happy you could ever get out of a stupid high

school dance. And then she said, someday, my

little sister will be old enough to have a prom.

Maybe she won't care. But in the event she does...I

am paying it forward in the hopes that some boy will

care enough to make her as happy as I just did that

boy tonight. And she went to bed. I could have

cried. Sometimes your teenagers are so selfish and

ratty but they do have their moments of magnificence.

If only a few more kids could think this way.

Kaye

--- and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs@...>

wrote:

> You said it, woman!!!

> Yep,,,I saw that story. I loved it too.

> And you're right,,,,,those people who think it was

> too extreme were never bullied and their kids either

> aren't bullied or they don't know they are.

> ***

> Having all kids " fit in " is such a simple request.

> It would be so easy to implement.

> If my kids left others out or said something they

> shouldn't to someone else, I'd be on them quicker

> than,,,,,,,I don't know.

> We've always taught them to defend the " one left

> out " . To be a friend to anyone who needs it.

> ALSO,,,,to forgive the " asses " if they are willing

> to treat you the way they should.

> Otherwise,,,,,,defend yourself.

> It's best to only have your family,,,than to have

> a bunch of " people " around who aren't in it for the

> long haul.

> WHY CAN'T EVERYONE DO THIS?????

> Think of the troubles that our kids wouldn't have

> if they knew they were accepted and that SOMEONE

> would want to hang with them.

> Ugh.

> Robin

>

> Haskin <babydoll_haskin@...>

wrote:

> You said it perfectly: WHY CAN'T

> PARENTS TEACH THEIR KIDS TO BE NICE! Did you all

> see in the news last month about that lady whose

> daughter was bullying kids and for punishment she

> made her carry a sign saying I'M A BULLY! I wanted

> to contact her and thank her for being proactive

> about her daughters cruel actions. Some of my

> co-workers were talking about how " extreme " that

> punishment was and I said " clearly you don't have a

> child that has been bullied " . I don't think people

> understand just how devastating the behavior

> (bullying) is.

>

> and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs@...>

wrote:

> I hear ya.

> Ian came back from the pool angry that other

> people kept taking the ball from him when he was

> playing catch with someone.

> I said, " hey....that's nice that others wanted to

> play though, right? "

> He said that they were taking the ball and

> basically " teasing " him and the other kid,,,,saying,

> " oh,,,,you want the ball? " and laughing.

> He's getting down about the whole thing.

> Why can't people teach their kids to be nice?

> Pisses me off.

> I want to always be " right there " to ward off the

> bullies.....to let them SEE that I'm right there as

> to not mess with him,,,,,,,,,,yet I feel like he's

> got to get used to this,,,,,,,ya know?

> Doesn't that sound horrible?

> If it was up to me,,,,,which,,,I know - it

> is,,,,,,,but if he didn't want to go over to the

> pool or want to be by others sometimes,,,,,he'd be

> better off. Or maybe it's ME who'd be better off?

> Breaks my heart.

> Little mean shits.

> Robin

>

> <hunebear3@...>

wrote:

> Robin,

>

> Too bad... we would be a pretty good match too. Our

> kids are all

> pretty much the same age... except I have 3 children

> and you have 4!

> My daughters are 8 and 4!

>

> Oh well... we can still " talk " here! I think it's

> wonderful that I can

> see that there are other children out there that do

> the same thing as

> mine. It's hard sometimes to realize that he has a

> DX because he's so

> smart and other times I have a hard time believing

> that he really is

> 10.5 years old!

>

> I just picked him up from Summer Enrichment School

> and he was so

> agitated. Dodge Ball was the issue today! Seems that

> he was the

> target of some children's aggression, or at least in

> his eyes he was!

>

> Jackie

> On Jun 19, 2007, at 2:10 PM, and/or Robin Lemke

> wrote:

>

> > Hi.

> > We're in Wisconsin. Shoot. Oh well. hee hee.

> > Ian just turned 11 last month. (9 yr old

> daughter, 7 yr old son and 5

> > yr old daughter, too)

> > Robin

> >

> > wrote:

> >> I WISH!! I live in TN... not sure where you are!

> My son is 10.5...

> >> how old is yours?

> >>

> >> Every time I read a post that sounds like my

> situation... I

> >> think... " maybe they live near me " ! I know one

> thing this group is

> >> making me want to reach out to locals with AS and

> see what sort of

> >> support groups that I can find. I know there are

> several with in a 30

> >> minute drive! It would be " nice " to be with other

> families that have

> >> children just like mine... that would be treated

> " normally " ! I hate

> >> those awful stares at the grocery store when my

> son throws himself

> >> down

> >> on the floor OR is screeching at me about How I

> mistreat him and how

> >> he

> >> has an awful life and it's worthless! I told one

> woman that tried to

> >> help me with some " advice " to mind her own

> business and until she had

> >> walked a day in MY shoes to keep her mouth shut!

> That didn't go over

> >> too well either... but she did walk away! LOL

> >>

> >> Jackie

> >> On Jun 19, 2007, at 7:38 AM, and/or Robin

> Lemke wrote:

> >>

> >> > Oh Jackie.

> >> > PLEASE tell me that your son is about my son's

> age and that you live

> >> > near me!!!!!

> >> > Ha ha......sob.

> >> > Why can't any of us live near eachother?????

> >> > Robin

> >> >

> >> > wrote:

> >> >> Robin,

> >> >> Your son sounds like mine! If anyone

> touches/bumps him he yells

> >> that

> >> >> they hit him 100 times! He slumps over and

> acts like he just got

> >> the

> >> >> heck beat out of him. OMG let's talk about

> when he loses in a

> >> game...

> >> >> Same response as your son... " It's not fair, I

> don't want to play

> >> your

> >> >> stupid game anyway " . My son YES's me when we

> talk about the

> >> incidents

> >> >> after the fact. He's got his learned responses

> down... but doesn't

> >> >> understand WHY he's saying them!

> >> >>

> >> >> My son doesn't have any friends either! SO

> sad!

> >> >>

> >> >> Jackie

> >> >> On Jun 18, 2007, at 3:37 PM, and/or Robin

> Lemke wrote:

> >> >>

> >> >> > If my son and another kid go for a ball and

> God-forbid, my son

> >> >> doesn't

> >> >> > end up with it,,,,,or something just-as-bad

> - gets knocked over

> >> or

> >> >> > " touched " or hurt in any way, he's

yelling

> that they hurt him and

> >> >> that

> >> >> > the game is stupid and starts to growl and

> his head sinks into

> >> his

> >> >> > shoulders.........it's awful.

> >> >> > We're really working on this now.....ugh.

> >> >> > As far as 4-square.......well,,,,,,,,,,it

> seems the boys will do

> >> the

> >> >> > different " passes " and make it hard for

> eachother and try to get

> >> >> > eachother " out " ....

> >> >> > Well,,,,,,Ian freaks when he gets

> out.......saying they aren't

> >> >> playing

> >> >> > fair. It's sad, actually.

> >> >> > He just does't " comprehend " AT THE TIME that

> THAT'S how the game

>

=== message truncated ===

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June 21, 2007

Oh my gosh, that is sooo sweet. It's so nice to hear kind stories like that one. If only everyone was like your daughter!!! Haskin <babydoll_haskin@...> wrote: Blah! (me crying). Beautiful story, beautiful child. God bless you!Kaye Bates <kcbates2003 > wrote: Can I tell you a true story about my 18 year olddaughter, a? She's a

plain old regular kid. :)Sometimes I wonder what it must be like to be thesibling of an AS child. But anyway...My Kris is avery compassionate girl. I think having a speciallittle sister has made her very sensitive to otherkids. She started visiting in the intensive supportprogram at her high school when she had free time,just seeing if she could help out or something. Thereshe met an autistic boy who was her age. He was notvery verbal but obviously very bright. She noticedover the course of the year that he was very aware ofthe high school dances. He would say that he hadinvited a girlfriend and ordered a tux. One time hetold Kris that he really wanted to learn how to dance.My daughter befriended this boy and taught him a fewdance steps. She slowly, over time, became aware thathis girlfriend was wishful thinking. One time shefound him on the computer, looking up different stylesof

tuxedoes...looking up flowers...wishing so muchthat he could just go to a high school dance. Thisreally got under the skin of my daughter. My kid isreally not so much into these things, she could takethem or leave them. One night she came and talked tome and my husband and asked, would it be ok if sheasked this boy to her senior prom? She told us, itwas really no big deal at all to her if she went...Shestarted talking about all the things in her futurethat she will get to do. And she thought of this boyand how this was the one thing that meant ohhhhhhhh somuch to him. How it was one stupid dance. That hewould never get to have. So, Krissy asked him to thedance. My husband called his grandmother, who raiseshim, and asked if he could help Krissy take this boyto the prom. The grandma cried. She could notbelieve it. My daughter went shopping for a promdress like any other senior in high school. She paidto

have her hair and nails done. My husband got aholdof a fancy car and played chauffeur. Krissy pinned aflower on her date's lapel. He was so excited he wasliterally jumping up and down for joy. His desireddinner date was at a local pizza place. Not typicalprom fare. However, my daughter said, this is abouthim. This is about giving him one special night thathe can treasure. He was dressed to the nines in atuxedo he chose himself. He went to the prom with mydaughter. The teacher's assistant from his class wasthere in case he had any special needs that he wouldneed help with. My daughter danced her prom nightaway with this very special young man. When theydropped him off, he hugged the life out of her andsaid..happy...happy...happy.... My husband made avideo of the whole thing so he can watch it over andover. A lot of kids mocked and made fun of mydaughter for doing this. Some of them even

went sofar as to try to trip this boy as he was dancing. Mydaughter faced every last one of them down. In fact,there were many kids that began to see, as the eveningwore on, that you can get a lot of joy from makingsomeone else happy. My daughter's friends also dancedwith her date. He was on cloud nine. At the end ofthe evening, I asked Kris...Are you glad you spentyour prom this way? And she said, mom, there aredifferent kinds of happy but I do believe this is thebest happy you could ever get out of a stupid highschool dance. And then she said, someday, mylittle sister will be old enough to have a prom. Maybe she won't care. But in the event she does...Iam paying it forward in the hopes that some boy willcare enough to make her as happy as I just did thatboy tonight. And she went to bed. I could havecried. Sometimes your teenagers are so selfish andratty but they do have their moments of

magnificence. If only a few more kids could think this way. Kaye--- and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs > wrote:> You said it, woman!!!> Yep,,,I saw that story. I loved it too.> And you're right,,,,,those people who think it was> too extreme were never bullied and their kids either> aren't bullied or they don't know they are.> ***> Having all kids "fit in" is such a simple request.> It would be so easy to implement.> If my kids left others out or said something they> shouldn't to someone else, I'd be on them quicker> than,,,,,,,I don't know.> We've always taught them to defend the "one left> out". To be a friend to anyone who needs it. > ALSO,,,,to forgive the "asses" if they are willing> to treat you the way they should. > Otherwise,,,,,,defend yourself. > It's best to

only have your family,,,than to have> a bunch of "people" around who aren't in it for the> long haul.> WHY CAN'T EVERYONE DO THIS?????> Think of the troubles that our kids wouldn't have> if they knew they were accepted and that SOMEONE> would want to hang with them.> Ugh.> Robin> > Haskin <babydoll_haskin > wrote:> You said it perfectly: WHY CAN'T> PARENTS TEACH THEIR KIDS TO BE NICE! Did you all> see in the news last month about that lady whose> daughter was bullying kids and for punishment she> made her carry a sign saying I'M A BULLY! I wanted> to contact her and thank her for being proactive> about her daughters cruel actions. Some of my> co-workers were talking about how "extreme" that> punishment was and I said "clearly you don't have a> child that has

been bullied". I don't think people> understand just how devastating the behavior> (bullying) is. > > and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs > wrote:> I hear ya.> Ian came back from the pool angry that other> people kept taking the ball from him when he was> playing catch with someone. > I said, "hey....that's nice that others wanted to> play though, right?"> He said that they were taking the ball and> basically "teasing" him and the other kid,,,,saying,> "oh,,,,you want the ball?" and laughing.> He's getting down about the whole thing. > Why can't people teach their kids to be nice? > Pisses me off.> I want to always be "right there" to ward off the> bullies.....to let them SEE that I'm right there as> to not mess with him,,,,,,,,,,yet I feel like he's> got to get

used to this,,,,,,,ya know?> Doesn't that sound horrible? > If it was up to me,,,,,which,,,I know - it> is,,,,,,,but if he didn't want to go over to the> pool or want to be by others sometimes,,,,,he'd be> better off. Or maybe it's ME who'd be better off?> Breaks my heart.> Little mean shits.> Robin> > <hunebear3comcast (DOT) net> wrote:> Robin,> > Too bad... we would be a pretty good match too. Our> kids are all > pretty much the same age... except I have 3 children> and you have 4! > My daughters are 8 and 4!> > Oh well... we can still "talk" here! I think it's> wonderful that I can > see that there are other children out there that do> the same thing as > mine. It's hard sometimes to realize that he has a> DX because he's so

> smart and other times I have a hard time believing> that he really is > 10.5 years old!> > I just picked him up from Summer Enrichment School> and he was so > agitated. Dodge Ball was the issue today! Seems that> he was the > target of some children's aggression, or at least in> his eyes he was!> > Jackie> On Jun 19, 2007, at 2:10 PM, and/or Robin Lemke> wrote:> > > Hi.> > We're in Wisconsin. Shoot. Oh well. hee hee.> > Ian just turned 11 last month. (9 yr old> daughter, 7 yr old son and 5 > > yr old daughter, too) > > Robin> >> >> > wrote:> >> I WISH!! I live in TN... not sure where you are!> My son is 10.5...> >> how old is yours?> >>> >> Every time I read a post that sounds like my>

situation... I> >> think..."maybe they live near me"! I know one> thing this group is> >> making me want to reach out to locals with AS and> see what sort of> >> support groups that I can find. I know there are> several with in a 30> >> minute drive! It would be "nice" to be with other> families that have> >> children just like mine... that would be treated> "normally"! I hate> >> those awful stares at the grocery store when my> son throws himself > >> down> >> on the floor OR is screeching at me about How I> mistreat him and how > >> he> >> has an awful life and it's worthless! I told one> woman that tried to> >> help me with some "advice" to mind her own> business and until she had> >> walked a day in MY shoes to keep her mouth shut!> That didn't go

over> >> too well either... but she did walk away! LOL> >>> >> Jackie> >> On Jun 19, 2007, at 7:38 AM, and/or Robin> Lemke wrote:> >>> >> > Oh Jackie.> >> > PLEASE tell me that your son is about my son's> age and that you live> >> > near me!!!!!> >> > Ha ha......sob.> >> > Why can't any of us live near eachother?????> >> > Robin> >> >> >> > wrote:> >> >> Robin,> >> >> Your son sounds like mine! If anyone> touches/bumps him he yells > >> that> >> >> they hit him 100 times! He slumps over and> acts like he just got > >> the> >> >> heck beat out of him. OMG let's talk about> when he loses in a > >>

game...> >> >> Same response as your son... "It's not fair, I> don't want to play > >> your> >> >> stupid game anyway". My son YES's me when we> talk about the > >> incidents> >> >> after the fact. He's got his learned responses> down... but doesn't> >> >> understand WHY he's saying them!> >> >>> >> >> My son doesn't have any friends either! SO> sad!> >> >>> >> >> Jackie> >> >> On Jun 18, 2007, at 3:37 PM, and/or Robin> Lemke wrote:> >> >>> >> >> > If my son and another kid go for a ball and> God-forbid, my son> >> >> doesn't> >> >> > end up with it,,,,,or something just-as-bad> - gets knocked over > >> or> >> >>

> "touched" or hurt in any way, he's yelling> that they hurt him and> >> >> that> >> >> > the game is stupid and starts to growl and> his head sinks into > >> his> >> >> > shoulders.........it's awful.> >> >> > We're really working on this now.....ugh.> >> >> > As far as 4-square.......well,,,,,,,,,,it> seems the boys will do > >> the> >> >> > different "passes" and make it hard for> eachother and try to get> >> >> > eachother "out"....> >> >> > Well,,,,,,Ian freaks when he gets> out.......saying they aren't> >> >> playing> >> >> > fair. It's sad, actually.> >> >> > He just does't "comprehend" AT THE TIME that> THAT'S how the game> ===

message truncated ===__________________________________________________________The fish are biting. Get more visitors on your site using Search Marketing.http://searchmarketing./arp/sponsoredsearch_v2.php Ready for the edge of your seat? Check out tonight's top picks on TV.

June 21, 2007

lol, Robin. I'm a mean mom, I am not the type to

give out cars. Instead I give my kid the joy of

working and earning it herself so she APPRECIATES IT.

Kaye (ps I also make them buy their own insurance!!!

And when learning to drive, if I see Jesus more than 3

times in five minutes, they are done).

--- and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs@...> wrote:

> Good Lord, Kaye.

> You're on a roll with the emails.

> I'm in tears.

> Your daughter deserves a car.......hee hee.

> You've done well.

> Robin

>

> Kaye Bates <kcbates2003@...> wrote:

> Can I tell you a true story about my 18

> year old

> daughter, a? She's a plain old regular kid.

>

> Sometimes I wonder what it must be like to be the

> sibling of an AS child. But anyway...My Kris is a

> very compassionate girl. I think having a special

> little sister has made her very sensitive to other

> kids. She started visiting in the intensive support

> program at her high school when she had free time,

> just seeing if she could help out or something.

> There

> she met an autistic boy who was her age. He was not

> very verbal but obviously very bright. She noticed

> over the course of the year that he was very aware

> of

> the high school dances. He would say that he had

> invited a girlfriend and ordered a tux. One time he

> told Kris that he really wanted to learn how to

> dance.

> My daughter befriended this boy and taught him a few

> dance steps. She slowly, over time, became aware

> that

> his girlfriend was wishful thinking. One time she

> found him on the computer, looking up different

> styles

> of tuxedoes...looking up flowers...wishing so much

> that he could just go to a high school dance. This

> really got under the skin of my daughter. My kid is

> really not so much into these things, she could take

> them or leave them. One night she came and talked to

> me and my husband and asked, would it be ok if she

> asked this boy to her senior prom? She told us, it

> was really no big deal at all to her if she

> went...She

> started talking about all the things in her future

> that she will get to do. And she thought of this boy

> and how this was the one thing that meant ohhhhhhhh

> so

> much to him. How it was one stupid dance. That he

> would never get to have. So, Krissy asked him to the

> dance. My husband called his grandmother, who raises

> him, and asked if he could help Krissy take this boy

> to the prom. The grandma cried. She could not

> believe it. My daughter went shopping for a prom

> dress like any other senior in high school. She paid

> to have her hair and nails done. My husband got

> ahold

> of a fancy car and played chauffeur. Krissy pinned a

> flower on her date's lapel. He was so excited he was

> literally jumping up and down for joy. His desired

> dinner date was at a local pizza place. Not typical

> prom fare. However, my daughter said, this is about

> him. This is about giving him one special night that

> he can treasure. He was dressed to the nines in a

> tuxedo he chose himself. He went to the prom with my

> daughter. The teacher's assistant from his class was

> there in case he had any special needs that he would

> need help with. My daughter danced her prom night

> away with this very special young man. When they

> dropped him off, he hugged the life out of her and

> said..happy...happy...happy.... My husband made a

> video of the whole thing so he can watch it over and

> over. A lot of kids mocked and made fun of my

> daughter for doing this. Some of them even went so

> far as to try to trip this boy as he was dancing. My

> daughter faced every last one of them down. In fact,

> there were many kids that began to see, as the

> evening

> wore on, that you can get a lot of joy from making

> someone else happy. My daughter's friends also

> danced

> with her date. He was on cloud nine. At the end of

> the evening, I asked Kris...Are you glad you spent

> your prom this way? And she said, mom, there are

> different kinds of happy but I do believe this is

> the

> best happy you could ever get out of a stupid high

> school dance. And then she said, someday, my

> little sister will be old enough to have a prom.

> Maybe she won't care. But in the event she does...I

> am paying it forward in the hopes that some boy will

> care enough to make her as happy as I just did that

> boy tonight. And she went to bed. I could have

> cried. Sometimes your teenagers are so selfish and

> ratty but they do have their moments of

> magnificence.

> If only a few more kids could think this way.

>

> Kaye

> --- and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs@...>

> wrote:

>

> > You said it, woman!!!

> > Yep,,,I saw that story. I loved it too.

> > And you're right,,,,,those people who think it was

> > too extreme were never bullied and their kids

> either

> > aren't bullied or they don't know they are.

> > ***

> > Having all kids " fit in " is such a simple request.

> > It would be so easy to implement.

> > If my kids left others out or said something they

> > shouldn't to someone else, I'd be on them quicker

> > than,,,,,,,I don't know.

> > We've always taught them to defend the " one left

> > out " . To be a friend to anyone who needs it.

> > ALSO,,,,to forgive the " asses " if they are willing

> > to treat you the way they should.

> > Otherwise,,,,,,defend yourself.

> > It's best to only have your family,,,than to have

> > a bunch of " people " around who aren't in it for

> the

> > long haul.

> > WHY CAN'T EVERYONE DO THIS?????

> > Think of the troubles that our kids wouldn't have

> > if they knew they were accepted and that SOMEONE

> > would want to hang with them.

> > Ugh.

> > Robin

> >

> > Haskin <babydoll_haskin@...> wrote:

> > You said it perfectly: WHY CAN'T

> > PARENTS TEACH THEIR KIDS TO BE NICE! Did you all

> > see in the news last month about that lady whose

> > daughter was bullying kids and for punishment she

> > made her carry a sign saying I'M A BULLY! I wanted

> > to contact her and thank her for being proactive

> > about her daughters cruel actions. Some of my

> > co-workers were talking about how " extreme " that

> > punishment was and I said " clearly you don't have

> a

> > child that has been bullied " . I don't think people

> > understand just how devastating the behavior

> > (bullying) is.

> >

> > and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs@...> wrote:

> > I hear ya.

> > Ian came back from the pool angry that other

> > people kept taking the ball from him when he was

> > playing catch with someone.

> > I said, " hey....that's nice that others wanted to

> > play though, right? "

> > He said that they were taking the ball and

> > basically " teasing " him and the other

> kid,,,,saying,

> > " oh,,,,you want the ball? " and laughing.

> > He's getting down about the whole thing.

> > Why can't people teach their kids to be nice?

> > Pisses me off.

> > I want to always be " right there " to ward off the

> > bullies.....to let them SEE that I'm right there

> as

> > to not mess with him,,,,,,,,,,yet I feel like he's

> > got to get used to this,,,,,,,ya know?

> > Doesn't that sound horrible?

> > If it was up to me,,,,,which,,,I know - it

> > is,,,,,,,but if he didn't want to go over to the

> > pool or want to be by others sometimes,,,,,he'd be

> > better off. Or maybe it's ME who'd be better off?

> > Breaks my heart.

> > Little mean shits.

> > Robin

> >

> > <hunebear3@...> wrote:

> > Robin,

> >

> > Too bad... we would be a pretty good match too.

> Our

> > kids are all

> > pretty much the same age... except I have 3

> children

> > and you have 4!

> > My daughters are 8 and 4!

> >

> > Oh well... we can still " talk " here! I think it's

> > wonderful that I can

> > see that there are other children out there that

> do

> > the same thing as

> > mine. It's hard sometimes to realize that he has a

> > DX because he's so

> > smart and other times I have a hard time believing

> > that he really is

> > 10.5 years old!

> >

> > I just picked him up from Summer Enrichment School

> > and he was so

> > agitated. Dodge Ball was the issue today! Seems

> that

> > he was the

> > target of some children's aggression, or at least

> in

>

=== message truncated ===

________________________________________________________________________________\

____

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June 21, 2007

If only we could develop in schools an emotional

climate that makes it politically incorrect to bully

or tease kids that are " different " . If only we could

get kids to understand that all human beings are of

equal worth and value. If only they could learn to be

compassionate and protective of children with special

needs...The whole world would be enriched.

Kaye

--- Toni <kbtoni@...> wrote:

> I have chills... Be proud of yourself for raising

> such a wonderful caring young lady! My prayer/dream

> is for my boys to find someone special and

> compassionate that can 'get through' the anxiety of

> my boys and find the real true, wonderful, funny,

> intelligent young men that they are with a few

> quirks... What a gem Kris is...I know you were

> overwhelmed with pride. If only there were more kids

> that took the " TIME " to try and get to know these

> magnificent kids...

> Toni

> Re: ( ) Homeschooling

> ASpie kids

>

> Can I tell you a true story about my 18 year old

> daughter, a? She's a plain old regular kid.

>

> Sometimes I wonder what it must be like to be the

> sibling of an AS child. But anyway...My Kris is a

> very compassionate girl. I think having a special

> little sister has made her very sensitive to other

> kids. She started visiting in the intensive

> support

> program at her high school when she had free time,

> just seeing if she could help out or something.

> There

> she met an autistic boy who was her age. He was

> not

> very verbal but obviously very bright. She noticed

> over the course of the year that he was very aware

> of

> the high school dances. He would say that he had

> invited a girlfriend and ordered a tux. One time

> he

> told Kris that he really wanted to learn how to

> dance.

> My daughter befriended this boy and taught him a

> few

> dance steps. She slowly, over time, became aware

> that

> his girlfriend was wishful thinking. One time she

> found him on the computer, looking up different

> styles

> of tuxedoes...looking up flowers...wishing so much

> that he could just go to a high school dance. This

> really got under the skin of my daughter. My kid

> is

> really not so much into these things, she could

> take

> them or leave them. One night she came and talked

> to

> me and my husband and asked, would it be ok if she

> asked this boy to her senior prom? She told us, it

> was really no big deal at all to her if she

> went...She

> started talking about all the things in her future

> that she will get to do. And she thought of this

> boy

> and how this was the one thing that meant

> ohhhhhhhh so

> much to him. How it was one stupid dance. That he

> would never get to have. So, Krissy asked him to

> the

> dance. My husband called his grandmother, who

> raises

> him, and asked if he could help Krissy take this

> boy

> to the prom. The grandma cried. She could not

> believe it. My daughter went shopping for a prom

> dress like any other senior in high school. She

> paid

> to have her hair and nails done. My husband got

> ahold

> of a fancy car and played chauffeur. Krissy pinned

> a

> flower on her date's lapel. He was so excited he

> was

> literally jumping up and down for joy. His desired

> dinner date was at a local pizza place. Not

> typical

> prom fare. However, my daughter said, this is

> about

> him. This is about giving him one special night

> that

> he can treasure. He was dressed to the nines in a

> tuxedo he chose himself. He went to the prom with

> my

> daughter. The teacher's assistant from his class

> was

> there in case he had any special needs that he

> would

> need help with. My daughter danced her prom night

> away with this very special young man. When they

> dropped him off, he hugged the life out of her and

> said..happy...happy...happy.... My husband made

> a

> video of the whole thing so he can watch it over

> and

> over. A lot of kids mocked and made fun of my

> daughter for doing this. Some of them even went so

> far as to try to trip this boy as he was dancing.

> My

> daughter faced every last one of them down. In

> fact,

> there were many kids that began to see, as the

> evening

> wore on, that you can get a lot of joy from making

> someone else happy. My daughter's friends also

> danced

> with her date. He was on cloud nine. At the end of

> the evening, I asked Kris...Are you glad you spent

> your prom this way? And she said, mom, there are

> different kinds of happy but I do believe this is

> the

> best happy you could ever get out of a stupid high

> school dance. And then she said, someday, my

> little sister will be old enough to have a prom.

> Maybe she won't care. But in the event she

> does...I

> am paying it forward in the hopes that some boy

> will

> care enough to make her as happy as I just did

> that

> boy tonight. And she went to bed. I could have

> cried. Sometimes your teenagers are so selfish and

> ratty but they do have their moments of

> magnificence.

> If only a few more kids could think this way.

>

> Kaye

> --- and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs@...>

> wrote:

>

> > You said it, woman!!!

> > Yep,,,I saw that story. I loved it too.

> > And you're right,,,,,those people who think it

> was

> > too extreme were never bullied and their kids

> either

> > aren't bullied or they don't know they are.

> > ***

> > Having all kids " fit in " is such a simple

> request.

> > It would be so easy to implement.

> > If my kids left others out or said something

> they

> > shouldn't to someone else, I'd be on them

> quicker

> > than,,,,,,,I don't know.

> > We've always taught them to defend the " one left

> > out " . To be a friend to anyone who needs it.

> > ALSO,,,,to forgive the " asses " if they are

> willing

> > to treat you the way they should.

> > Otherwise,,,,,,defend yourself.

> > It's best to only have your family,,,than to

> have

> > a bunch of " people " around who aren't in it for

> the

> > long haul.

> > WHY CAN'T EVERYONE DO THIS?????

> > Think of the troubles that our kids wouldn't

> have

> > if they knew they were accepted and that SOMEONE

> > would want to hang with them.

> > Ugh.

> > Robin

> >

> > Haskin <babydoll_haskin@...>

> wrote:

> > You said it perfectly: WHY CAN'T

> > PARENTS TEACH THEIR KIDS TO BE NICE! Did you all

> > see in the news last month about that lady whose

> > daughter was bullying kids and for punishment

> she

> > made her carry a sign saying I'M A BULLY! I

> wanted

> > to contact her and thank her for being proactive

> > about her daughters cruel actions. Some of my

> > co-workers were talking about how " extreme " that

> > punishment was and I said " clearly you don't

> have a

> > child that has been bullied " . I don't think

> people

> > understand just how devastating the behavior

> > (bullying) is.

> >

> > and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs@...>

> wrote:

> > I hear ya.

> > Ian came back from the pool angry that other

> > people kept taking the ball from him when he was

> > playing catch with someone.

> > I said, " hey....that's nice that others wanted

> to

>

=== message truncated ===

________________________________________________________________________________\

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June 22, 2007

Kaye – I laughed hysterically when I read the part about “seeing

Jesus”. Unfortunately, I no longer have the patience - or maybe I

should say I don’t think my heart can handle it – to let my 17 year

old drive. I have already raised two NT children (now aged 31 and 27) and

did ride with them while they were learning. My 17 yo Aspie still has his

driver’s permit as we, and he, do not feel he is emotionally or

technically ready to handle driving by himself. He has taken driver’s

ed and we have paid for individual driving lessons but he is still not

ready. Hopefully, he will mature enough in the next year. Luckily,

he realizes he is not ready yet so it has not been a fight.

From:

[mailto: ] On

Behalf Of Kaye Bates

Sent: Thursday, June 21, 2007 2:16 PM

Subject: Re: ( ) Homeschooling ASpie kids

lol, Robin. I'm a mean mom, I am not the type to

give out cars. Instead I give my kid the joy of

working and earning it herself so she APPRECIATES IT.

Kaye (ps I also make them buy their own insurance!!!

And when learning to drive, if I see Jesus more than 3

times in five minutes, they are done).

--- and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs@...>

wrote:

> Good Lord, Kaye.

> You're on a roll with the emails.

> I'm in tears.

> Your daughter deserves a car.......hee hee.

> You've done well.

> Robin

>

> Kaye Bates <kcbates2003@...>

wrote:

> Can I tell you a true story about my 18

> year old

> daughter, a? She's a plain old regular kid.

>

> Sometimes I wonder what it must be like to be the

> sibling of an AS child. But anyway...My Kris is a

> very compassionate girl. I think having a special

> little sister has made her very sensitive to other

> kids. She started visiting in the intensive support

> program at her high school when she had free time,

> just seeing if she could help out or something.

> There

> she met an autistic boy who was her age. He was not

> very verbal but obviously very bright. She noticed

> over the course of the year that he was very aware

> of

> the high school dances. He would say that he had

> invited a girlfriend and ordered a tux. One time he

> told Kris that he really wanted to learn how to

> dance.

> My daughter befriended this boy and taught him a few

> dance steps. She slowly, over time, became aware

> that

> his girlfriend was wishful thinking. One time she

> found him on the computer, looking up different

> styles

> of tuxedoes...looking up flowers...wishing so much

> that he could just go to a high school dance. This

> really got under the skin of my daughter. My kid is

> really not so much into these things, she could take

> them or leave them. One night she came and talked to

> me and my husband and asked, would it be ok if she

> asked this boy to her senior prom? She told us, it

> was really no big deal at all to her if she

> went...She

> started talking about all the things in her future

> that she will get to do. And she thought of this boy

> and how this was the one thing that meant ohhhhhhhh

> so

> much to him. How it was one stupid dance. That he

> would never get to have. So, Krissy asked him to the

> dance. My husband called his grandmother, who raises

> him, and asked if he could help Krissy take this boy

> to the prom. The grandma cried. She could not

> believe it. My daughter went shopping for a prom

> dress like any other senior in high school. She paid

> to have her hair and nails done. My husband got

> ahold

> of a fancy car and played chauffeur. Krissy pinned a

> flower on her date's lapel. He was so excited he was

> literally jumping up and down for joy. His desired

> dinner date was at a local pizza place. Not typical

> prom fare. However, my daughter said, this is about

> him. This is about giving him one special night that

> he can treasure. He was dressed to the nines in a

> tuxedo he chose himself. He went to the prom with my

> daughter. The teacher's assistant from his class was

> there in case he had any special needs that he would

> need help with. My daughter danced her prom night

> away with this very special young man. When they

> dropped him off, he hugged the life out of her and

> said..happy...happy...happy.... My husband made a

> video of the whole thing so he can watch it over and

> over. A lot of kids mocked and made fun of my

> daughter for doing this. Some of them even went so

> far as to try to trip this boy as he was dancing. My

> daughter faced every last one of them down. In fact,

> there were many kids that began to see, as the

> evening

> wore on, that you can get a lot of joy from making

> someone else happy. My daughter's friends also

> danced

> with her date. He was on cloud nine. At the end of

> the evening, I asked Kris...Are you glad you spent

> your prom this way? And she said, mom, there are

> different kinds of happy but I do believe this is

> the

> best happy you could ever get out of a stupid high

> school dance. And then she said, someday, my

> little sister will be old enough to have a prom.

> Maybe she won't care. But in the event she does...I

> am paying it forward in the hopes that some boy will

> care enough to make her as happy as I just did that

> boy tonight. And she went to bed. I could have

> cried. Sometimes your teenagers are so selfish and

> ratty but they do have their moments of

> magnificence.

> If only a few more kids could think this way.

>

> Kaye

> --- and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs@...>

> wrote:

>

> > You said it, woman!!!

> > Yep,,,I saw that story. I loved it too.

> > And you're right,,,,,those people who think it was

> > too extreme were never bullied and their kids

> either

> > aren't bullied or they don't know they are.

> > ***

> > Having all kids " fit in " is such a simple request.

> > It would be so easy to implement.

> > If my kids left others out or said something they

> > shouldn't to someone else, I'd be on them quicker

> > than,,,,,,,I don't know.

> > We've always taught them to defend the " one left

> > out " . To be a friend to anyone who needs it.

> > ALSO,,,,to forgive the " asses " if they are willing

> > to treat you the way they should.

> > Otherwise,,,,,,defend yourself.

> > It's best to only have your family,,,than to have

> > a bunch of " people " around who aren't in it for

> the

> > long haul.

> > WHY CAN'T EVERYONE DO THIS?????

> > Think of the troubles that our kids wouldn't have

> > if they knew they were accepted and that SOMEONE

> > would want to hang with them.

> > Ugh.

> > Robin

> >

> > Haskin <babydoll_haskin@...>

wrote:

> > You said it perfectly: WHY CAN'T

> > PARENTS TEACH THEIR KIDS TO BE NICE! Did you all

> > see in the news last month about that lady whose

> > daughter was bullying kids and for punishment she

> > made her carry a sign saying I'M A BULLY! I wanted

> > to contact her and thank her for being proactive

> > about her daughters cruel actions. Some of my

> > co-workers were talking about how " extreme " that

> > punishment was and I said " clearly you don't have

> a

> > child that has been bullied " . I don't think people

> > understand just how devastating the behavior

> > (bullying) is.

> >

> > and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs@...>

wrote:

> > I hear ya.

> > Ian came back from the pool angry that other

> > people kept taking the ball from him when he was

> > playing catch with someone.

> > I said, " hey....that's nice that others wanted to

> > play though, right? "

> > He said that they were taking the ball and

> > basically " teasing " him and the other

> kid,,,,saying,

> > " oh,,,,you want the ball? " and laughing.

> > He's getting down about the whole thing.

> > Why can't people teach their kids to be nice?

> > Pisses me off.

> > I want to always be " right there " to ward off the

> > bullies.....to let them SEE that I'm right there

> as

> > to not mess with him,,,,,,,,,,yet I feel like he's

> > got to get used to this,,,,,,,ya know?

> > Doesn't that sound horrible?

> > If it was up to me,,,,,which,,,I know - it

> > is,,,,,,,but if he didn't want to go over to the

> > pool or want to be by others sometimes,,,,,he'd be

> > better off. Or maybe it's ME who'd be better off?

> > Breaks my heart.

> > Little mean shits.

> > Robin

> >

> > <hunebear3@...>

wrote:

> > Robin,

> >

> > Too bad... we would be a pretty good match too.

> Our

> > kids are all

> > pretty much the same age... except I have 3

> children

> > and you have 4!

> > My daughters are 8 and 4!

> >

> > Oh well... we can still " talk " here! I think it's

> > wonderful that I can

> > see that there are other children out there that

> do

> > the same thing as

> > mine. It's hard sometimes to realize that he has a

> > DX because he's so

> > smart and other times I have a hard time believing

> > that he really is

> > 10.5 years old!

> >

> > I just picked him up from Summer Enrichment School

> > and he was so

> > agitated. Dodge Ball was the issue today! Seems

> that

> > he was the

> > target of some children's aggression, or at least

> in

>

=== message truncated ===

__________________________________________________________

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June 22, 2007

Well, that was my rule when my oldest three were

learning how to drive. I see Jesus just thinking

about my 13 year old Aspie learning so maybe we will

stay in denial and just never go there with her!

Kaye

--- <cindyelgamal@...> wrote:

> Kaye - I laughed hysterically when I read the part

> about " seeing Jesus " .

> Unfortunately, I no longer have the patience - or

> maybe I should say I don't

> think my heart can handle it - to let my 17 year old

> drive. I have already

> raised two NT children (now aged 31 and 27) and did

> ride with them while

> they were learning. My 17 yo Aspie still has his

> driver's permit as we, and

> he, do not feel he is emotionally or technically

> ready to handle driving by

> himself. He has taken driver's ed and we have paid

> for individual driving

> lessons but he is still not ready. Hopefully, he

> will mature enough in the

> next year. Luckily, he realizes he is not ready yet

> so it has not been a

> fight.

>

> From:

> [mailto: ] On Behalf

> Of Kaye Bates

> Sent: Thursday, June 21, 2007 2:16 PM

>

> Subject: Re: ( ) Homeschooling ASpie

> kids

>

> lol, Robin. I'm a mean mom, I am not the type to

> give out cars. Instead I give my kid the joy of

> working and earning it herself so she APPRECIATES

> IT.

>

> Kaye (ps I also make them buy their own insurance!!!

>

> And when learning to drive, if I see Jesus more than

> 3

> times in five minutes, they are done).

>

> --- and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs@...

> <mailto:jrisjs%40> >

> wrote:

>

> > Good Lord, Kaye.

> > You're on a roll with the emails.

> > I'm in tears.

> > Your daughter deserves a car.......hee hee.

> > You've done well.

> > Robin

> >

> > Kaye Bates <kcbates2003@...

> <mailto:kcbates2003%40> >

> wrote:

> > Can I tell you a true story about my 18

> > year old

> > daughter, a? She's a plain old regular kid.

>

> >

> > Sometimes I wonder what it must be like to be the

> > sibling of an AS child. But anyway...My Kris is a

> > very compassionate girl. I think having a special

> > little sister has made her very sensitive to other

> > kids. She started visiting in the intensive

> support

> > program at her high school when she had free time,

> > just seeing if she could help out or something.

> > There

> > she met an autistic boy who was her age. He was

> not

> > very verbal but obviously very bright. She noticed

> > over the course of the year that he was very aware

> > of

> > the high school dances. He would say that he had

> > invited a girlfriend and ordered a tux. One time

> he

> > told Kris that he really wanted to learn how to

> > dance.

> > My daughter befriended this boy and taught him a

> few

> > dance steps. She slowly, over time, became aware

> > that

> > his girlfriend was wishful thinking. One time she

> > found him on the computer, looking up different

> > styles

> > of tuxedoes...looking up flowers...wishing so much

> > that he could just go to a high school dance. This

> > really got under the skin of my daughter. My kid

> is

> > really not so much into these things, she could

> take

> > them or leave them. One night she came and talked

> to

> > me and my husband and asked, would it be ok if she

> > asked this boy to her senior prom? She told us, it

> > was really no big deal at all to her if she

> > went...She

> > started talking about all the things in her future

> > that she will get to do. And she thought of this

> boy

> > and how this was the one thing that meant

> ohhhhhhhh

> > so

> > much to him. How it was one stupid dance. That he

> > would never get to have. So, Krissy asked him to

> the

> > dance. My husband called his grandmother, who

> raises

> > him, and asked if he could help Krissy take this

> boy

> > to the prom. The grandma cried. She could not

> > believe it. My daughter went shopping for a prom

> > dress like any other senior in high school. She

> paid

> > to have her hair and nails done. My husband got

> > ahold

> > of a fancy car and played chauffeur. Krissy pinned

> a

> > flower on her date's lapel. He was so excited he

> was

> > literally jumping up and down for joy. His desired

> > dinner date was at a local pizza place. Not

> typical

> > prom fare. However, my daughter said, this is

> about

> > him. This is about giving him one special night

> that

> > he can treasure. He was dressed to the nines in a

> > tuxedo he chose himself. He went to the prom with

> my

> > daughter. The teacher's assistant from his class

> was

> > there in case he had any special needs that he

> would

> > need help with. My daughter danced her prom night

> > away with this very special young man. When they

> > dropped him off, he hugged the life out of her and

> > said..happy...happy...happy.... My husband made

> a

> > video of the whole thing so he can watch it over

> and

> > over. A lot of kids mocked and made fun of my

> > daughter for doing this. Some of them even went so

> > far as to try to trip this boy as he was dancing.

> My

> > daughter faced every last one of them down. In

> fact,

> > there were many kids that began to see, as the

> > evening

> > wore on, that you can get a lot of joy from making

> > someone else happy. My daughter's friends also

> > danced

> > with her date. He was on cloud nine. At the end of

> > the evening, I asked Kris...Are you glad you spent

> > your prom this way? And she said, mom, there are

> > different kinds of happy but I do believe this is

> > the

> > best happy you could ever get out of a stupid high

> > school dance. And then she said, someday, my

> > little sister will be old enough to have a prom.

> > Maybe she won't care. But in the event she

> does...I

> > am paying it forward in the hopes that some boy

> will

> > care enough to make her as happy as I just did

> that

> > boy tonight. And she went to bed. I could have

> > cried. Sometimes your teenagers are so selfish and

> > ratty but they do have their moments of

> > magnificence.

> > If only a few more kids could think this way.

> >

> > Kaye

> > --- and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs@...

> <mailto:jrisjs%40>

> >

> > wrote:

> >

> > > You said it, woman!!!

> > > Yep,,,I saw that story. I loved it too.

> > > And you're right,,,,,those people who think it

> was

> > > too extreme were never bullied and their kids

> > either

> > > aren't bullied or they don't know they are.

> > > ***

> > > Having all kids " fit in " is such a simple

> request.

> > > It would be so easy to implement.

> > > If my kids left others out or said something

> they

> > > shouldn't to someone else, I'd be on them

> quicker

>

=== message truncated ===

________________________________________________________________________________\

____

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June 22, 2007

I know. It is really sweet when NT kids can just be

NICE. And lots of them are. Many times I think the

problem is, they just don't understand that a kid has

special needs. Maybe they just think the child is

" weird " . If adults could step in and explain autism

or AS to kids, and explain to them what these kids

need, maybe more of them would just be nice. I have

seen it before, if you just explain to them and give

them a chance, many of them will step up and be a

friend. It truly does mean the world.

Kaye

--- or Steve <4ganas@...> wrote:

> You have such a lovely daughter! There was a girl

> in Prestons classes this last year that told the

> teacher... " I don't know what the issues are or where

> he has been before now. I just want to be his

> friend. " She made a point to talk to him every day.

> She stayed with him when their 8th grade class had

> a picnic at the park to make sure he did not isolate

> himself and to just be their so his anxiety would

> not skyrocket.

> I was not given the chance to thank her and tell her

> what she had done for him. So I'll thank you and

> your daughter. It was not the prom, but it was just

> as heart warming.

>

> Re: ( ) Homeschooling

> ASpie kids

>

> Oh my gosh, that is sooo sweet. It's so nice to

> hear kind stories like that one. If only everyone

> was like your daughter!!!

>

> Haskin <babydoll_haskin@...> wrote:

>

> Blah! (me crying). Beautiful story, beautiful

> child. God bless you!

>

> Kaye Bates <kcbates2003@...> wrote:

> Can I tell you a true story about my 18 year

> old

> daughter, a? She's a plain old regular

> kid.

>

> Sometimes I wonder what it must be like to be

> the

> sibling of an AS child. But anyway...My Kris

> is a

> very compassionate girl. I think having a

> special

> little sister has made her very sensitive to

> other

> kids. She started visiting in the intensive

> support

> program at her high school when she had free

> time,

> just seeing if she could help out or

> something. There

> she met an autistic boy who was her age. He

> was not

> very verbal but obviously very bright. She

> noticed

> over the course of the year that he was very

> aware of

> the high school dances. He would say that he

> had

> invited a girlfriend and ordered a tux. One

> time he

> told Kris that he really wanted to learn how

> to dance.

> My daughter befriended this boy and taught him

> a few

> dance steps. She slowly, over time, became

> aware that

> his girlfriend was wishful thinking. One time

> she

> found him on the computer, looking up

> different styles

> of tuxedoes...looking up flowers...wishing so

> much

> that he could just go to a high school dance.

> This

> really got under the skin of my daughter. My

> kid is

> really not so much into these things, she

> could take

> them or leave them. One night she came and

> talked to

> me and my husband and asked, would it be ok if

> she

> asked this boy to her senior prom? She told

> us, it

> was really no big deal at all to her if she

> went...She

> started talking about all the things in her

> future

> that she will get to do. And she thought of

> this boy

> and how this was the one thing that meant

> ohhhhhhhh so

> much to him. How it was one stupid dance. That

> he

> would never get to have. So, Krissy asked him

> to the

> dance. My husband called his grandmother, who

> raises

> him, and asked if he could help Krissy take

> this boy

> to the prom. The grandma cried. She could not

> believe it. My daughter went shopping for a

> prom

> dress like any other senior in high school.

> She paid

> to have her hair and nails done. My husband

> got ahold

> of a fancy car and played chauffeur. Krissy

> pinned a

> flower on her date's lapel. He was so excited

> he was

> literally jumping up and down for joy. His

> desired

> dinner date was at a local pizza place. Not

> typical

> prom fare. However, my daughter said, this is

> about

> him. This is about giving him one special

> night that

> he can treasure. He was dressed to the nines

> in a

> tuxedo he chose himself. He went to the prom

> with my

> daughter. The teacher's assistant from his

> class was

> there in case he had any special needs that he

> would

> need help with. My daughter danced her prom

> night

> away with this very special young man. When

> they

> dropped him off, he hugged the life out of her

> and

> said..happy...happy...happy.... My husband

> made a

> video of the whole thing so he can watch it

> over and

> over. A lot of kids mocked and made fun of my

> daughter for doing this. Some of them even

> went so

> far as to try to trip this boy as he was

> dancing. My

> daughter faced every last one of them down. In

> fact,

> there were many kids that began to see, as the

> evening

> wore on, that you can get a lot of joy from

> making

> someone else happy. My daughter's friends also

> danced

> with her date. He was on cloud nine. At the

> end of

> the evening, I asked Kris...Are you glad you

> spent

> your prom this way? And she said, mom, there

> are

> different kinds of happy but I do believe this

> is the

> best happy you could ever get out of a stupid

> high

> school dance. And then she said, someday,

> my

> little sister will be old enough to have a

> prom.

> Maybe she won't care. But in the event she

> does...I

> am paying it forward in the hopes that some

> boy will

> care enough to make her as happy as I just did

> that

> boy tonight. And she went to bed. I could have

> cried. Sometimes your teenagers are so selfish

> and

> ratty but they do have their moments of

> magnificence.

> If only a few more kids could think this

> way.

>

> Kaye

> --- and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs@...>

> wrote:

>

> > You said it, woman!!!

> > Yep,,,I saw that story. I loved it too.

> > And you're right,,,,,those people who think

> it was

> > too extreme were never bullied and their

> kids either

> > aren't bullied or they don't know they are.

> > ***

> > Having all kids " fit in " is such a simple

> request.

> > It would be so easy to implement.

> > If my kids left others out or said something

> they

> > shouldn't to someone else, I'd be on them

> quicker

>

=== message truncated ===

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June 23, 2007

Again, there are variations because my son was 4 when he began to

ride on his own. I put it down to vehicles - any sort - being his

most favourite thing in the world as his motivation to succeed. I

hope the same will be true of driving one day (that scares me, but he

is only 11 right now).

By the way, he and his younger brother are nuts for Pokemon. Our 2

older sons went through a phase when they first arrived on the scene.

> > > > You said it perfectly: WHY CAN'T

> > > > PARENTS TEACH THEIR KIDS TO BE NICE! Did you all

> > > > see in the news last month about that lady whose

> > > > daughter was bullying kids and for punishment

> > she

> > > > made her carry a sign saying I'M A BULLY! I

> > wanted

> > > > to contact her and thank her for being proactive

> > > > about her daughters cruel actions. Some of my

> > > > co-workers were talking about how " extreme " that

> > > > punishment was and I said " clearly you don't

> > have

> > > a

> > > > child that has been bullied " . I don't think

> > people

> > > > understand just how devastating the behavior

> >

> === message truncated ===

>

______________________________________________________________________

______________

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>

June 23, 2007

Noel,

You said some really important things when you were

talking about just " politeness " and " respect " . If our

kids could even just get that, it would be alot

easier. I know there are privacy/confidentiality

issues, but isn't it strange that you were expected to

help that girl, but no one explained to you what her

issues were? Wouldn't it have made it easier for all

of you if someone just could have explained???

Your honesty says, you didn't even feel that " nice "

towards her, yet you were still polite and had

respect. And look how much that meant to her! It

isn't that it is some huge thing that the NT world has

to do--just manners...just respect...those should not

be that hard to do, should they? I wish we could all

just get to that level.

Kaye

--- Noel <stephon605@...> wrote:

> Sniff, sniff. Amazing story Kaye. I aggree, I think

> there are many

> great kids out there who would behave like your

> daughter (at least I

> hope so) but peer pressure can be terrible. I think

> they are so

> worried about getting picked on that they don't

> reach out even if

> they want to.

>

> In grade school (many years ago)there was a

> " challenged " girl in my

> class of 16 kids. She was much older than all of us

> and to be

> honest, I never did know what her diagnosis was.

> She was physically

> challenged as well as verbally and mentally. Some

> of us girls had to

> take turns helping her after PE to get dressed,

> specifically clasping

> her bra. It was not a chore any of us liked but we

> did as we were

> told. She was always happy, always smiling and just

> a nice girl. I

> remember feeling a bit uncomfortable around her but

> just never

> teasing her or being mean. I didn't feel I was

> overly nice, just not

> mean. Anyway, her mother spoke to mine years later

> and said how this

> girl liked me so much. She said it was because I

> was always kind.

>

> It just broke my heart to hear that. She liked me

> so much because I

> was kind? I didn't feel I was necessarily nice,

> just polite but it

> mattered to her. I guess I really realized how

> simple manners and

> common respect can make a differnce to someone.

> Your daughter will

> probably never know that she made the memory of a

> lifetime for that

> young man. You did something right with that one

> mom!!!!!

>

> Noel

>

> > > Can I tell you a true story about my 18

> year

> > > old

> > > daughter, a? She's a plain old

> regular

> > > kid.

> > >

> > > Sometimes I wonder what it must be like to

> be

> > > the

> > > sibling of an AS child. But anyway...My

> Kris

> > > is a

> > > very compassionate girl. I think having a

> > > special

> > > little sister has made her very sensitive

> to

> > > other

> > > kids. She started visiting in the

> intensive

> > > support

> > > program at her high school when she had

> free

> > > time,

> > > just seeing if she could help out or

> > > something. There

> > > she met an autistic boy who was her age.

> He

> > > was not

> > > very verbal but obviously very bright. She

> > > noticed

> > > over the course of the year that he was

> very

> > > aware of

> > > the high school dances. He would say that

> he

> > > had

> > > invited a girlfriend and ordered a tux.

> One

> > > time he

> > > told Kris that he really wanted to learn

> how

> > > to dance.

> > > My daughter befriended this boy and taught

> him

> > > a few

> > > dance steps. She slowly, over time, became

> > > aware that

> > > his girlfriend was wishful thinking. One

> time

> > > she

> > > found him on the computer, looking up

> > > different styles

> > > of tuxedoes...looking up flowers...wishing

> so

> > > much

> > > that he could just go to a high school

> dance.

> > > This

> > > really got under the skin of my daughter.

> My

> > > kid is

> > > really not so much into these things, she

> > > could take

> > > them or leave them. One night she came and

> > > talked to

> > > me and my husband and asked, would it be

> ok if

> > > she

> > > asked this boy to her senior prom? She

> told

> > > us, it

> > > was really no big deal at all to her if

> she

> > > went...She

> > > started talking about all the things in

> her

> > > future

> > > that she will get to do. And she thought

> of

> > > this boy

>

=== message truncated ===

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June 25, 2007

This was so touching Kaye! Thanks for sharing.

Ima

> >>>>>>

> >>>>>>> If my son and another kid go for a ball and

> >> God-forbid, my son

> >>>>>> doesn't

> >>>>>>> end up with it,,,,,or something just-as-bad

> >> - gets knocked over

> >>>> or

> >>>>>>> " touched " or hurt in any way, he's yelling

> >> that they hurt him and

> >>>>>> that

> >>>>>>> the game is stupid and starts to growl and

> >> his head sinks into

> >>>> his

> >>>>>>> shoulders.........it's awful.

> >>>>>>> We're really working on this now.....ugh.

> >>>>>>> As far as 4-square.......well,,,,,,,,,,it

> >> seems the boys will do

> >>>> the

> >>>>>>> different " passes " and make it hard for

> >> eachother and try to get

> >>>>>>> eachother " out " ....

> >>>>>>> Well,,,,,,Ian freaks when he gets

> >> out.......saying they aren't

> >>>>>> playing

> >>>>>>> fair. It's sad, actually.

> >>>>>>> He just does't " comprehend " AT THE TIME that

> >> THAT'S how the game

> >>

> > === message truncated ===

> >

______________________________________________________________________

_

> > _____________

> > The fish are biting.

> > Get more visitors on your site using Search Marketing.

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> >

June 26, 2007

IF ONLY...

Toni

Re: ( ) Homeschooling> ASpie kids> > > Can I tell you a true story about my 18 year old> daughter, a? She's a plain old regular kid.> > > > Sometimes I wonder what it must be like to be the> sibling of an AS child. But anyway...My Kris is a> very compassionate girl. I think having a special> little sister has made her very sensitive to other> kids. She started visiting in the intensive> support> program at her high school when she had free time,> just seeing if she could help out or something.> There> she met an autistic boy who was her age. He was> not> very verbal but obviously very bright. She noticed> over the course of the year that he was very aware> of> the high school dances. He would say that he had> invited a girlfriend and ordered a tux. One time> he> told Kris that he really wanted to learn how to> dance.> My daughter befriended this boy and taught him a> few> dance steps. She slowly, over time, became aware> that> his girlfriend was wishful thinking. One time she> found him on the computer, looking up different> styles> of tuxedoes...looking up flowers...wishing so much> that he could just go to a high school dance. This> really got under the skin of my daughter. My kid> is> really not so much into these things, she could> take> them or leave them. One night she came and talked> to> me and my husband and asked, would it be ok if she> asked this boy to her senior prom? She told us, it> was really no big deal at all to her if she> went...She> started talking about all the things in her future> that she will get to do. And she thought of this> boy> and how this was the one thing that meant> ohhhhhhhh so> much to him. How it was one stupid dance. That he> would never get to have. So, Krissy asked him to> the> dance. My husband called his grandmother, who> raises> him, and asked if he could help Krissy take this> boy> to the prom. The grandma cried. She could not> believe it. My daughter went shopping for a prom> dress like any other senior in high school. She> paid> to have her hair and nails done. My husband got> ahold> of a fancy car and played chauffeur. Krissy pinned> a> flower on her date's lapel. He was so excited he> was> literally jumping up and down for joy. His desired> dinner date was at a local pizza place. Not> typical> prom fare. However, my daughter said, this is> about> him. This is about giving him one special night> that> he can treasure. He was dressed to the nines in a> tuxedo he chose himself. He went to the prom with> my> daughter. The teacher's assistant from his class> was> there in case he had any special needs that he> would> need help with. My daughter danced her prom night> away with this very special young man. When they> dropped him off, he hugged the life out of her and> said..happy...happy...happy.... My husband made> a> video of the whole thing so he can watch it over> and> over. A lot of kids mocked and made fun of my> daughter for doing this. Some of them even went so> far as to try to trip this boy as he was dancing.> My> daughter faced every last one of them down. In> fact,> there were many kids that began to see, as the> evening> wore on, that you can get a lot of joy from making> someone else happy. My daughter's friends also> danced> with her date. He was on cloud nine. At the end of> the evening, I asked Kris...Are you glad you spent> your prom this way? And she said, mom, there are> different kinds of happy but I do believe this is> the> best happy you could ever get out of a stupid high> school dance. And then she said, someday, my> little sister will be old enough to have a prom. > Maybe she won't care. But in the event she> does...I> am paying it forward in the hopes that some boy> will> care enough to make her as happy as I just did> that> boy tonight. And she went to bed. I could have> cried. Sometimes your teenagers are so selfish and> ratty but they do have their moments of> magnificence. > If only a few more kids could think this way. > > Kaye> --- and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs >> wrote:> > > You said it, woman!!!> > Yep,,,I saw that story. I loved it too.> > And you're right,,,,,those people who think it> was> > too extreme were never bullied and their kids> either> > aren't bullied or they don't know they are.> > ***> > Having all kids "fit in" is such a simple> request.> > It would be so easy to implement.> > If my kids left others out or said something> they> > shouldn't to someone else, I'd be on them> quicker> > than,,,,,,,I don't know.> > We've always taught them to defend the "one left> > out". To be a friend to anyone who needs it. > > ALSO,,,,to forgive the "asses" if they are> willing> > to treat you the way they should. > > Otherwise,,,,,,defend yourself. > > It's best to only have your family,,,than to> have> > a bunch of "people" around who aren't in it for> the> > long haul.> > WHY CAN'T EVERYONE DO THIS?????> > Think of the troubles that our kids wouldn't> have> > if they knew they were accepted and that SOMEONE> > would want to hang with them.> > Ugh.> > Robin> > > > Haskin <babydoll_haskin >> wrote:> > You said it perfectly: WHY CAN'T> > PARENTS TEACH THEIR KIDS TO BE NICE! Did you all> > see in the news last month about that lady whose> > daughter was bullying kids and for punishment> she> > made her carry a sign saying I'M A BULLY! I> wanted> > to contact her and thank her for being proactive> > about her daughters cruel actions. Some of my> > co-workers were talking about how "extreme" that> > punishment was and I said "clearly you don't> have a> > child that has been bullied". I don't think> people> > understand just how devastating the behavior> > (bullying) is. > > > > and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs >> wrote:> > I hear ya.> > Ian came back from the pool angry that other> > people kept taking the ball from him when he was> > playing catch with someone. > > I said, "hey....that's nice that others wanted> to> === message truncated ===__________________________________________________________Food fight? Enjoy some healthy debate in the Answers Food & Drink Q & A.http://answers./dir/?link=list & sid=396545367

June 30, 2007

My husband lightly touched my son's back the other day and my son "fell" to the ground and yelled that he hit him. <hunebear3@...> wrote: Robin,Your son sounds like mine! If anyone touches/bumps him he yells that they hit him 100 times! He slumps over and acts like he just got the heck beat out of him. OMG let's talk about when he loses in a game... Same response as your son... "It's not fair, I don't want to play your stupid game anyway". My son YES's me when we talk about the incidents after the fact. He's got his learned responses down... but doesn't understand WHY he's saying them!My son doesn't have any friends either! SO sad!JackieOn Jun 18, 2007, at 3:37 PM, and/or Robin Lemke wrote:> If my son and another kid go for a ball and God-forbid, my son

doesn't > end up with it,,,,,or something just-as-bad - gets knocked over or > "touched" or hurt in any way, he's yelling that they hurt him and that > the game is stupid and starts to growl and his head sinks into his > shoulders.........it's awful.> We're really working on this now.....ugh.> As far as 4-square.......well,,,,,,,,,,it seems the boys will do the > different "passes" and make it hard for eachother and try to get > eachother "out"....> Well,,,,,,Ian freaks when he gets out.......saying they aren't playing > fair. It's sad, actually.> He just does't "comprehend" AT THE TIME that THAT'S how the game goes.> He gets it later,,,,,after we chat. But,,,,by then, the damage is > done. No one wants to play.................I kinda don't blame them.> Sigh.> Robin >>

wrote:>> I have "tag" issues! My son tags just a little too hard... then has to>> sit down the rest of Recess!!>>>> Jackie>> On Jun 18, 2007, at 12:45 PM, and/or Robin Lemke wrote:>>>> > We had "4-square" nightmares, too!!!!!>> > What was yours?>> > Robin>> >>> > Roxanna wrote:>> >> Thanks for writing all that. I agree with you. I just wondered >> what>> >> kinds of stuff you have found around here to do. Sounds like there>> >> are a lot of options really. That makes me feel much better. >> >> >> >> When the boys read in the afternoon - is this what they do because>> >> they like to read or do you direct it more. I mean, do you require>> >> reading time vs. time

spent on computer games, etc. My ds is >> really>> >> into computers and gaming. My biggest problem will be having him >> do>> >> other things besides playing games. I don't think it will be>> >> impossible to put together new routines and rules - just that it >> will>> >> take effort. lol. Also, if you require reading time, do you have>> >> them pick a subject and then help them stay focused on that >> subject? >> >> Do you ask questions each day or have them write reports or>> >> presentations on what they are learning? Or do you let them read>> >> whatever subject they want that week? Do you use virtual school or>> >> do you homeschool from "scratch?" >> >> >> >> The playground scenes you describe are

exactly what happens to my >> ds,>> >> 10 yo. He wanders around, never fitting in with any one "group" >> and>> >> then outright struggling in some situations like the "four square">> >> nightmare we had the last few weeks of school. The good thing >> about>> >> middle school is that lunch and recess are total of 30 minutes and>> >> only once a day. Still, I worry. I want to see if they can have >> him>> >> work in the office or help with something instead of just wander>> >> around trying to play. And even then, he might get mad and feel >> he's>> >> being punished if he isn't allowed to just hang out like the >> others. >> >> So we will have to watch how we set things up. Who knows. Middle>> >> school

is really the land of the unknown even having gone through >> it>> >> already with the oldest ds! Maybe that even makes it worse >> because I>> >> know what can happen and go wrong. >> >> >> >> Roxanna>> >> Autism Happens>> >>> Re: ( ) Homeschooling ASpie kids>> >>>>> >>> We start at 8am. We are done by noon. Things that happen after >> noon>> >>> often 'count' as educational - the boys were in 2 hours of >> homeschool>> >>> afternoon PE classes, for example. Our social activities happen>> >>>

after>> >>> noon as well. I put quotes around the word 'count' because truly, >> so>> >>> many things are educational that are not sit down structured >> workbook>> >>> stuff. We belong to a homeschool nature journaling club for >> example>> >>> that meets on a monthly basis, and the kids have taken off with>> >>> that.>> >>> On their own, Ethan is reading about the Middle East, and >> is>> >>> reading about black-capped chickadees. They have time to devote to>> >>> their interests because once their workbooks are done, they are on>> >>> their own to do things. Back in March opted to research >> rocks>> >>> and minerals. Ethan read about US in the 1800's.>> >>>>> >>> Anyway, back to

social stuff. I keep them active in scouts, and>> >>> >> >>> participates in baseball. During the school year, I also had them >> in>> >>> the after school PTA specials, so Ethan did chess and did >> the>> >>> zoo club.>> >>>>> >>> We belong to a hiking club that has public schooled kids. We met >> on>> >>> T>> >>> nights to hike during the public school year - now we are meeting>> >>> throughout the week at various times. Last week we even went on >> two>> >>> hikes the same day - one hike with a family that has three kids.>> >>> Another hike with two families that have four kids.>> >>>>> >>> Every T afternoon we head to a local town and meet other >>

homeschool>> >>> kids. There are 30 families in this particular group (it's>> >>> ecclectic)>> >>> and 5-10 families show up each week to play for several hours.>> >>>>> >>> We also have weekly playdates with a homeschool family in another>> >>> town. A couple of weeks ago Ethan came up to me at a park and said>> >>> he>> >>> did not want to play what the other kids were playing. I told him>> >>> that>> >>> it was ok - that he could do something else. He then said, "But I>> >>> want>> >>> to be where the other kids are." That's pretty big coming from >> him!>> >>>>> >>> Anyway, IF you decide to take your son home, let me know. You >> can't>> >>> believe how Ethan has

bloomed in this environment. This is pretty>> >>> much>> >>> a direct quote from him, "I get a lot more done in a lot less >> time,>> >>> and>> >>> I get to spend more time doing what I want and playing with other>> >>> kids. I also get to see Baby more.">> >>>>> >>> I don't believe for a minute that Ethan is suffering socially. I>> >>> used to go to recess and watch him from my car circling the>> >>> playground biting his coat in anxiety. 30 minutes was not enough>> >>> time for him to relax and engage with others. The 20-30 minute >> lunch>> >>> he got where he could have spent time talking with other kids was >> a>> >>> loss on him as well. The environment was too loud. There was too>> >>> much to

watch. He liked to time how long it took classes to line >> up>> >>> and leave. He liked to be first in line and would pay attention to>> >>> the cues that his table was about to be dismissed. When other kids>> >>> talked to him, he did not hear them. The final 15 minutes in the >> day>> >>> devoted to recess - a joke for any kid let alone a child on the>> >>> spectrum. As far as social interactions throughout the rest of the>> >>> day? They might talk in line, but getting in trouble for doing so>> >>> made Ethan not only stop but get mad and yell at other kids for >> doing>> >>> it. They were told to read a book when they got done with desk >> work ->> >>> not talk to others.>> >>>>> >>> Anyway, sorry to go on and on, LOL - I

am passionate about this. I>> >>> don't think it is for every family or every kid but it always >> gets my>> >>> underthings bunched up when somebody makes it seem like >> homeschooled>> >>> kids are raised in bubbles. I don't think that every time a family>> >>> is having trouble with the school they ought to homeschool. I >> don't>> >>> think every time a homeschool family is struggling with >> socialization>> >>> that public school is the solution, either.>> >>>>> >>> >> >>>>> >>> >> >>> >>> >>> > How does he get contact with other kids while being >> homeschooled?>> >>> >>>

>>> > Roxanna>> >>> > Autism Happens>> >>>>> >>> > Need a vacation? Get great deals to amazing places on Travel.>> >> Park yourself in front of a world of choices in alternative vehicles.> Visit the Auto Green Center.

July 1, 2007

Yep. Freaky, isn't it? My son handles "heavier" pressure better. We've never been able to just "lightly touch" him as we're walking by. It's gotta be a "pressure" squeeze.......like a back rub or "sqeeze" on his upper shoulder/back/neck.......know what I mean? Almost like a deep-tissue rub. Even the tolerance for that is different at times. Robin Essenfeld <lessen@...> wrote: My husband lightly touched my son's back the other day and

my son "fell" to the ground and yelled that he hit him. <hunebear3comcast (DOT) net> wrote: Robin,Your son sounds like mine! If anyone touches/bumps him he yells that they hit him 100 times! He slumps over and acts like he just got the heck beat out of him. OMG let's talk about when he loses in a game... Same response as your son... "It's not fair, I don't want to play your stupid game anyway". My son YES's me when we talk about the incidents after the fact. He's got his learned responses down... but doesn't understand WHY he's saying them!My son doesn't have any friends either! SO sad!JackieOn Jun 18, 2007, at 3:37 PM, and/or Robin Lemke wrote:> If my son and another kid go for a ball and God-forbid, my son doesn't > end up with it,,,,,or something just-as-bad - gets knocked over or

> "touched" or hurt in any way, he's yelling that they hurt him and that > the game is stupid and starts to growl and his head sinks into his > shoulders.........it's awful.> We're really working on this now.....ugh.> As far as 4-square.......well,,,,,,,,,,it seems the boys will do the > different "passes" and make it hard for eachother and try to get > eachother "out"....> Well,,,,,,Ian freaks when he gets out.......saying they aren't playing > fair. It's sad, actually.> He just does't "comprehend" AT THE TIME that THAT'S how the game goes.> He gets it later,,,,,after we chat. But,,,,by then, the damage is > done. No one wants to play.................I kinda don't blame them.> Sigh.> Robin >> wrote:>> I have "tag" issues! My son tags just a little

too hard... then has to>> sit down the rest of Recess!!>>>> Jackie>> On Jun 18, 2007, at 12:45 PM, and/or Robin Lemke wrote:>>>> > We had "4-square" nightmares, too!!!!!>> > What was yours?>> > Robin>> >>> > Roxanna wrote:>> >> Thanks for writing all that. I agree with you. I just wondered >> what>> >> kinds of stuff you have found around here to do. Sounds like there>> >> are a lot of options really. That makes me feel much better. >> >> >> >> When the boys read in the afternoon - is this what they do because>> >> they like to read or do you direct it more. I mean, do you require>> >> reading time vs. time spent on computer games, etc. My ds is >> really>> >>

into computers and gaming. My biggest problem will be having him >> do>> >> other things besides playing games. I don't think it will be>> >> impossible to put together new routines and rules - just that it >> will>> >> take effort. lol. Also, if you require reading time, do you have>> >> them pick a subject and then help them stay focused on that >> subject? >> >> Do you ask questions each day or have them write reports or>> >> presentations on what they are learning? Or do you let them read>> >> whatever subject they want that week? Do you use virtual school or>> >> do you homeschool from "scratch?" >> >> >> >> The playground scenes you describe are exactly what happens to my >> ds,>> >> 10 yo. He

wanders around, never fitting in with any one "group" >> and>> >> then outright struggling in some situations like the "four square">> >> nightmare we had the last few weeks of school. The good thing >> about>> >> middle school is that lunch and recess are total of 30 minutes and>> >> only once a day. Still, I worry. I want to see if they can have >> him>> >> work in the office or help with something instead of just wander>> >> around trying to play. And even then, he might get mad and feel >> he's>> >> being punished if he isn't allowed to just hang out like the >> others. >> >> So we will have to watch how we set things up. Who knows. Middle>> >> school is really the land of the unknown even having gone through >>

it>> >> already with the oldest ds! Maybe that even makes it worse >> because I>> >> know what can happen and go wrong. >> >> >> >> Roxanna>> >> Autism Happens>> >>> Re: ( ) Homeschooling ASpie kids>> >>>>> >>> We start at 8am. We are done by noon. Things that happen after >> noon>> >>> often 'count' as educational - the boys were in 2 hours of >> homeschool>> >>> afternoon PE classes, for example. Our social activities happen>> >>> after>> >>> noon as well. I put quotes

around the word 'count' because truly, >> so>> >>> many things are educational that are not sit down structured >> workbook>> >>> stuff. We belong to a homeschool nature journaling club for >> example>> >>> that meets on a monthly basis, and the kids have taken off with>> >>> that.>> >>> On their own, Ethan is reading about the Middle East, and >> is>> >>> reading about black-capped chickadees. They have time to devote to>> >>> their interests because once their workbooks are done, they are on>> >>> their own to do things. Back in March opted to research >> rocks>> >>> and minerals. Ethan read about US in the 1800's.>> >>>>> >>> Anyway, back to social stuff. I keep them active in scouts, and>>

>>> >> >>> participates in baseball. During the school year, I also had them >> in>> >>> the after school PTA specials, so Ethan did chess and did >> the>> >>> zoo club.>> >>>>> >>> We belong to a hiking club that has public schooled kids. We met >> on>> >>> T>> >>> nights to hike during the public school year - now we are meeting>> >>> throughout the week at various times. Last week we even went on >> two>> >>> hikes the same day - one hike with a family that has three kids.>> >>> Another hike with two families that have four kids.>> >>>>> >>> Every T afternoon we head to a local town and meet other >> homeschool>> >>> kids. There are 30 families in this

particular group (it's>> >>> ecclectic)>> >>> and 5-10 families show up each week to play for several hours.>> >>>>> >>> We also have weekly playdates with a homeschool family in another>> >>> town. A couple of weeks ago Ethan came up to me at a park and said>> >>> he>> >>> did not want to play what the other kids were playing. I told him>> >>> that>> >>> it was ok - that he could do something else. He then said, "But I>> >>> want>> >>> to be where the other kids are." That's pretty big coming from >> him!>> >>>>> >>> Anyway, IF you decide to take your son home, let me know. You >> can't>> >>> believe how Ethan has bloomed in this environment. This is pretty>> >>>

much>> >>> a direct quote from him, "I get a lot more done in a lot less >> time,>> >>> and>> >>> I get to spend more time doing what I want and playing with other>> >>> kids. I also get to see Baby more.">> >>>>> >>> I don't believe for a minute that Ethan is suffering socially. I>> >>> used to go to recess and watch him from my car circling the>> >>> playground biting his coat in anxiety. 30 minutes was not enough>> >>> time for him to relax and engage with others. The 20-30 minute >> lunch>> >>> he got where he could have spent time talking with other kids was >> a>> >>> loss on him as well. The environment was too loud. There was too>> >>> much to watch. He liked to time how long it took classes to line >>

up>> >>> and leave. He liked to be first in line and would pay attention to>> >>> the cues that his table was about to be dismissed. When other kids>> >>> talked to him, he did not hear them. The final 15 minutes in the >> day>> >>> devoted to recess - a joke for any kid let alone a child on the>> >>> spectrum. As far as social interactions throughout the rest of the>> >>> day? They might talk in line, but getting in trouble for doing so>> >>> made Ethan not only stop but get mad and yell at other kids for >> doing>> >>> it. They were told to read a book when they got done with desk >> work ->> >>> not talk to others.>> >>>>> >>> Anyway, sorry to go on and on, LOL - I am passionate about this. I>> >>> don't think it is

for every family or every kid but it always >> gets my>> >>> underthings bunched up when somebody makes it seem like >> homeschooled>> >>> kids are raised in bubbles. I don't think that every time a family>> >>> is having trouble with the school they ought to homeschool. I >> don't>> >>> think every time a homeschool family is struggling with >> socialization>> >>> that public school is the solution, either.>> >>>>> >>> >> >>>>> >>> >> >>> >>> >>> > How does he get contact with other kids while being >> homeschooled?>> >>> >>> >>> > Roxanna>> >>> >

Autism Happens>> >>>>> >>> > Need a vacation? Get great deals to amazing places on Travel.>> >> Park yourself in front of a world of choices in alternative vehicles.> Visit the Auto Green Center.

Choose the right car based on your needs. Check out Autos new Car Finder tool.

July 1, 2007

Oh Yes......my dd is the same way! And dare we try to prevent a fall or look at her...or God forbid ask if she is okay after a mishap.....OMG!

Re: ( ) Homeschooling ASpie kids>> >>>>> >>> We start at 8am. We are done by noon. Things that happen after >> noon>> >>> often 'count' as educational - the boys were in 2 hours of >> homeschool>> >>> afternoon PE classes, for example. Our social activities happen>> >>> after>> >>> noon as well. I put quotes around the word 'count' because truly, >> so>> >>> many things are educational that are not sit down structured >> workbook>> >>> stuff. We belong to a homeschool nature journaling club for >> example>> >>> that meets on a monthly basis, and the kids have taken off with>> >>> that.>> >>> On their own, Ethan is reading about the Middle East, and >> is>> >>> reading about black-capped chickadees. They have time to devote to>> >>> their interests because once their workbooks are done, they are on>> >>> their own to do things. Back in March opted to research >> rocks>> >>> and minerals. Ethan read about US in the 1800's.>> >>>>> >>> Anyway, back to social stuff. I keep them active in scouts, and>> >>> >> >>> participates in baseball. During the school year, I also had them >> in>> >>> the after school PTA specials, so Ethan did chess and did >> the>> >>> zoo club.>> >>>>> >>> We belong to a hiking club that has public schooled kids. We met >> on>> >>> T>> >>> nights to hike during the public school year - now we are meeting>> >>> throughout the week at various times. Last week we even went on >> two>> >>> hikes the same day - one hike with a family that has three kids.>> >>> Another hike with two families that have four kids.>> >>>>> >>> Every T afternoon we head to a local town and meet other >> homeschool>> >>> kids. There are 30 families in this particular group (it's>> >>> ecclectic)>> >>> and 5-10 families show up each week to play for several hours.>> >>>>> >>> We also have weekly playdates with a homeschool family in another>> >>> town. A couple of weeks ago Ethan came up to me at a park and said>> >>> he>> >>> did not want to play what the other kids were playing. I told him>> >>> that>> >>> it was ok - that he could do something else. He then said, "But I>> >>> want>> >>> to be where the other kids are." That's pretty big coming from >> him!>> >>>>> >>> Anyway, IF you decide to take your son home, let me know. You >> can't>> >>> believe how Ethan has bloomed in this environment. This is pretty>> >>> much>> >>> a direct quote from him, "I get a lot more done in a lot less >> time,>> >>> and>> >>> I get to spend more time doing what I want and playing with other>> >>> kids. I also get to see Baby more.">> >>>>> >>> I don't believe for a minute that Ethan is suffering socially. I>> >>> used to go to recess and watch him from my car circling the>> >>> playground biting his coat in anxiety. 30 minutes was not enough>> >>> time for him to relax and engage with others. The 20-30 minute >> lunch>> >>> he got where he could have spent time talking with other kids was >> a>> >>> loss on him as well. The environment was too loud. There was too>> >>> much to watch. He liked to time how long it took classes to line >> up>> >>> and leave. He liked to be first in line and would pay attention to>> >>> the cues that his table was about to be dismissed. When other kids>> >>> talked to him, he did not hear them. The final 15 minutes in the >> day>> >>> devoted to recess - a joke for any kid let alone a child on the>> >>> spectrum. As far as social interactions throughout the rest of the>> >>> day? They might talk in line, but getting in trouble for doing so>> >>> made Ethan not only stop but get mad and yell at other kids for >> doing>> >>> it. They were told to read a book when they got done with desk >> work ->> >>> not talk to others.>> >>>>> >>> Anyway, sorry to go on and on, LOL - I am passionate about this. I>> >>> don't think it is for every family or every kid but it always >> gets my>> >>> underthings bunched up when somebody makes it seem like >> homeschooled>> >>> kids are raised in bubbles. I don't think that every time a family>> >>> is having trouble with the school they ought to homeschool. I >> don't>> >>> think every time a homeschool family is struggling with >> socialization>> >>> that public school is the solution, either.>> >>>>> >>> >> >>>>> >>> >> >>> >>> >>> > How does he get contact with other kids while being >> homeschooled?>> >>> >>> >>> > Roxanna>> >>> > Autism Happens>> >>>>> >>> > Need a vacation? Get great deals to amazing places on Travel.>> >> Park yourself in front of a world of choices in alternative vehicles.> Visit the Auto Green Center.

July 3, 2007

My daughter got her sensory issues from me. I cannot handle light

pressure. I like deep pressure. But my daughter can handle both.

She has auditory hypersensativity and sensativity to light and hot

temperature.

Jen

> >> >>> >

> >> >>> > How does he get contact with other kids while being

> >> homeschooled?

> >> >>> >

> >> >>> > Roxanna

> >> >>> > Autism Happens

> >> >>>

> >> >

> >> > Need a vacation? Get great deals to amazing places on

Travel.

> >> >

> > Park yourself in front of a world of choices in alternative

vehicles.

> > Visit the Auto Green Center.

>

> ---------------------------------

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