Re: OT: Autism: The Musical

March 30, 2007

If you celebrate your child's first lie to you as a developmental milestone....you might have a child with autism.If you took video of your two year old lining up his cars in a row because you thought it was so interesting and brilliant....

you might have a child with autism...... you just don't know it yet.

March 30, 2007

oh man.. I would love to post this... on my message board...

I run a message board of moms with 09/04 babies. 65 moms...

and one is in serious denial. her girl is on the spectrum, mild but its there... now I am basing this on a few things, her posts, videos, pics, comments... plus work from the moms who have met this girl in person...

I may be wrong, but mom won even acknowledge my posts to her.

there was one pic she posted of lined up toys... and all the other moms were saying its normal their kids do it too --but um... the WAY the toys were lined up... classified, OCD kinda line. not random.

there is more to the story, but like I said, i would to post that comment you made but it would start a crap-storm..

hmmm... actually I could post the whole tread just to be funny and end on that note

--this thread would be appreciated there b/c of the 65 moms and 105 kids represented there are 4 with ASD (16, 12, 4, 2.5 ages) 2 more 2.5 year olds that PROBABLY are but one is in the process of being dx and the other is the denial mom and about 10 in ST.

that is less than 1 in 20 kids with ASD in a random group.

and we definately have our 1 in 6 with LD

On 3/29/07, Karin Barasa <kbarasa@...> wrote:

IIf you took video of your two year old lining up his cars in a row because you thought it was so interesting and brilliant.... you might have a child with autism...... you just don't know it yet.

.._,_.___

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March 30, 2007

What is "CSE season"? Aasachristine <christine@...> wrote: If you don’t go to PTA meetings because the other parents just don’t understand...(and you can’t go to SEPTA meetings because they are too depressing)If you know every Mcs in a 100 mile radius...If you hate springtime because that means CSE season...If you can invite every kid from your child’s class to his birthday

party...If you are upset that Steve left and you never got used to Joe...If you pay $500 for a doctor’s visit...If you have to fly to visit your child’s doctor...If you feel like you know more than your child’s doctor...If at Christmas time you have to spend $400 on gifts to 12 staff people...(teacher, aide, aide, bus driver, bus aide, SLP, OT, PT, Consultant, etc)If you know the ingredients in every vaccine...If you have heard of the phrase “Isn’t that like Rainman?”...If you know which Rice Milks contain Soy...If you have to ask the pharmacy for “extra” anti-biotics because half of it ends up on the floor...If your UPS and FEDEX guys know you by name...If you turn into the Hulk when someone asks “why doesn’t your kid _______?”....(stand still, look at me, answer me, talk, stop screaming, shut up, sit down, etc) If you go to autism conferences just to feel

“normal”.....If you go to autism conferences just to drink

March 30, 2007

Eeewwwww, I have some awful memories related to this one: If you have invested in a professional plumber’s snake…….. Many years ago, when our kids were younger, they jammed up one of our toilets so badly with assorted items, that even the plumber could not clear it, and we had to get the whole toilet replaced. In my own naive state of mind, I was happy to see my youngest son involved in play with his sister when they were getting washcloths and heading towards the bathroom that was out of my line of sight while I was preparing dinner in the kitchen. I was assuming that they were doing some innocent messing around with water and/or pretend cleaning in the bathroom. Later, when I found our bathtub filling up

with other people's poop, I realized that whatever our kids might have been doing in the bathroom, probably wasn't all that innocent! It turned out that our youngest son, and his even younger sister had been having all kinds of fun, flushing rather large objects down the toilet, washcloths, hand towels, and rocks from a sibling's rock collection included. All that stuff plugged up the drains below our apartment, and later, when the people who lived on the close to 20 floors directly above us flushed their toilets, all their excrement had nowhere to go, other than to back up through the pipes and into our bathtub! What a disgusting nightmare! Luckily, I was able to evacuate the kids to my parents' place, while my husband called in a plumber to deal with the sh***y

mess. The only positive thing about this incident was, that it scared the kids out of throwing any more items down the toilet that did not belong there! For a while afterward, they were all afraid to even flush any toilets! Aasa Holly Bortfeld <maximom@...> wrote: If you come into the living room and realize your 3 year old has actually MOVED the furniture because it was breaking up his long line of legos or cars…. If you have invested in a professional plumber’s snake…….. If your keychain makes you look like a locksmith, you can tell which is which by the feel and they never leave your body…… When you start repeating today’s stim phrases without realizing it…… When you no longer hear the Revenge of the Sith music playing for the last 7

hours….. When you can recognize and name every thomas the tank engine and all of his frickin friends from 15 feet away and actually correct someone when they get one wrong… When you know to save everything you are working on on your computer BEFORE you lift one butt cheek because you know it will be closed the second you turn around…. When you no longer expect privacy in the bathroom and wonder where the hell he is when you have it…… When you can multitask yelling “stop licking the tv”, open the door for the UPS guy who is delivering your $300 worth of new compounded meds, talk on the phone to some insurance company idiot who is denying your claims, again, and wipe peanut butter off the staircase railing at the same time and haven’t had coffee

yet…… When you drink to a friend’s 10 year old having her first poop on the potty….. When it’s easier to just sell your house and move than it is to keep painting and cleaning poop off the walls…. When you have to explain what those stains are on the walls and carpets to the realtor and you forget not everyone has furniture bolted to the walls until you see the look on his face….. When the feeling in two of your fingertips goes away when it’s cold because your kid bit the living piss out of them when you were teaching him to swallow pills 7 years ago….. When you spend your summer vacation learning the peptide synthesis cycle…. You know the fax number and health aide’s name and birthday for all your congressmen & senators….. You have started a collection and filled more than 15 binders with “procedural safeguards” from school

meetings…… When your 6yo son can tell you every single financing detail on getting a new Chevy during Truck month – “2.9% APR financing for approved buyers”….. When your son sees a car fire on the drive home one day and the next day screams bloody murder for another car fire the next day, and every day for the next week, because it was sparkly…… When you know ketchup goes on ALL potatoes, including mashed, because it’s a potato after all….. Next…

March 30, 2007

when you're the only mom in your town with numbing cream and an

oxygen mask in your purse at all times...

>

> If you come into the living room and realize your 3 year old has

actually

> MOVED the furniture because it was breaking up his long line of

legos or

> cars..

>

> If you have invested in a professional plumber's snake....

>

> If your keychain makes you look like a locksmith, you can tell

which is

> which by the feel and they never leave your body..

>

> When you start repeating today's stim phrases without realizing

it..

>

> When you no longer hear the Revenge of the Sith music playing for

the last 7

> hours...

>

> When you can recognize and name every thomas the tank engine and

all of his

> frickin friends from 15 feet away and actually correct someone

when they get

> one wrong.

>

> When you know to save everything you are working on on your

computer BEFORE

> you lift one butt cheek because you know it will be closed the

second you

> turn around..

>

> When you no longer expect privacy in the bathroom and wonder where

the hell

> he is when you have it..

>

> When you can multitask yelling " stop licking the tv " , open the

door for the

> UPS guy who is delivering your $300 worth of new compounded meds,

talk on

> the phone to some insurance company idiot who is denying your

claims, again,

> and wipe peanut butter off the staircase railing at the same time

and

> haven't had coffee yet..

>

> When you drink to a friend's 10 year old having her first poop on

the

> potty...

>

> When it's easier to just sell your house and move than it is to

keep

> painting and cleaning poop off the walls..

>

> When you have to explain what those stains are on the walls and

carpets to

> the realtor and you forget not everyone has furniture bolted to

the walls

> until you see the look on his face...

>

> When the feeling in two of your fingertips goes away when it's

cold because

> your kid bit the living piss out of them when you were teaching

him to

> swallow pills 7 years ago...

>

> When you spend your summer vacation learning the peptide synthesis

cycle..

>

> You know the fax number and health aide's name and birthday for

all your

> congressmen & senators...

>

> You have started a collection and filled more than 15 binders with

> " procedural safeguards " from school meetings..

>

> When your 6yo son can tell you every single financing detail on

getting a

> new Chevy during Truck month - " 2.9% APR financing for approved

buyers " ...

>

> When your son sees a car fire on the drive home one day and the

next day

> screams bloody murder for another car fire the next day, and every

day for

> the next week, because it was sparkly..

>

> When you know ketchup goes on ALL potatoes, including mashed,

because it's a

> potato after all...

>

> Next.

>

March 30, 2007

There is actually a web site for adults with Asperger's (Aspies) who have an

entire page of

these they made up themselves. It started with a few jokes and Aspies everywhere

began

posting their own...I think it was several pages long....

Some things they joked about were actually informative...like one said something

about " if

you are walking and feel like the world is a closing tunnel....you may be an

aspie " . It was

something on those lines....constricted visual fields...

Interesting...I'll try to find the web site...

Col

> >

> > They're killing me with this stuff. . . Autism: The Musical

> >

> > What next " Colorectal Cancer: The Musical " or maybe " Autism - I want

> > to drive my car off a bridge: The Musical " .

> >

> > I am sure this film is sweet for those families with pencil tapping

> > autism.

> >

> > Lenny

> >

> > Morrill

> > Publicity

> > Tribeca Film Festival

> > March 27, 2007

> >

> > Editor

> > Dear Lenny Schafer

> >

> > I am one of the publicity coordinators at the Tribeca Film Festival

> > this year and I am reaching out to you to introduce one of the

> > documentary films we have at the festival this year, Autism: The

> > Musical. As April is National Autism Month, I think it would be

> > extremely interesting for you to look into this inspiring and

> > optimistic story which shows the ability within the disability and

> > allows people to connect with young autistic children.

> >

> > I'd be happy to provide any other details that would be helpful and

> > look forward to discussing these films and any other films that you

> > are interested in.

> >

> > Thanks!

> >

> > Morrill ~ Tribeca Film Festival

> > Discovery ~ Publicity Coordinator

> >

>

March 30, 2007

ROFL! When I took my NT 4 yr old for her ears to be pierced they

couldn't figure out why I had EMLA cream to put on her lobes before we

left the house.

Debi

>

> when you're the only mom in your town with numbing cream and an

> oxygen mask in your purse at all times...

>

March 30, 2007

Hey, is everyone okay if I put them on my myspace blog? I'll keep them

anonymous unless someone wants credit/linkage.

Debi

> > >

> > > They're killing me with this stuff. . . Autism: The Musical

> > >

> > > What next " Colorectal Cancer: The Musical " or maybe " Autism - I want

> > > to drive my car off a bridge: The Musical " .

> > >

> > > I am sure this film is sweet for those families with pencil tapping

> > > autism.

> > >

> > > Lenny

> > >

> > > Morrill

> > > Publicity

> > > Tribeca Film Festival

> > > March 27, 2007

> > >

> > > Editor

> > > Dear Lenny Schafer

> > >

> > > I am one of the publicity coordinators at the Tribeca Film Festival

> > > this year and I am reaching out to you to introduce one of the

> > > documentary films we have at the festival this year, Autism: The

> > > Musical. As April is National Autism Month, I think it would be

> > > extremely interesting for you to look into this inspiring and

> > > optimistic story which shows the ability within the disability and

> > > allows people to connect with young autistic children.

> > >

> > > I'd be happy to provide any other details that would be helpful and

> > > look forward to discussing these films and any other films that you

> > > are interested in.

> > >

> > > Thanks!

> > >

> > > Morrill ~ Tribeca Film Festival

> > > Discovery ~ Publicity Coordinator

> > >

> >

>

March 30, 2007

I thought the same thing...quick, take full credit, Holly!

>

> Holly - Quick! Take full credit for these very, extremely funny lines

> because pretty soon we will see them all over the place! These are

> sooo good, you should publish them!! I haven't laughed this hard in

> a while. What's great about these, is that no matter what we think

> caused autism, or the best way to treat it? We ALL can relate!

> Sally

March 30, 2007

Well, here in NY everyone has committee meetings in the Spring to decide what will be in their child’s IEP (education plan).

It’s basically when the shit hits the fan when it comes to services. Many parents stress out because they have to fight for stuff.

On 3/29/07 11:58 PM, " Aasa " <penas7ar@...> wrote:

What is " CSE season " ?

Aasa

christine <christine@...> wrote:

If you don’t go to PTA meetings because the other parents just don’t understand...

(and you can’t go to SEPTA meetings because they are too depressing)

If you know every Mcs in a 100 mile radius...

If you hate springtime because that means CSE season...

If you can invite every kid from your child’s class to his birthday party...

If you are upset that Steve left and you never got used to Joe...

If you pay $500 for a doctor’s visit...

If you have to fly to visit your child’s doctor...

If you feel like you know more than your child’s doctor...

If at Christmas time you have to spend $400 on gifts to 12 staff people...

(teacher, aide, aide, bus driver, bus aide, SLP, OT, PT, Consultant, etc)

If you know the ingredients in every vaccine...

If you have heard of the phrase “Isn’t that like Rainman?”...

If you know which Rice Milks contain Soy...

If you have to ask the pharmacy for “extra” anti-biotics because half of it ends up on the floor...

If your UPS and FEDEX guys know you by name...

If you turn into the Hulk when someone asks “why doesn’t your kid _______?”....

(stand still, look at me, answer me, talk, stop screaming, shut up, sit down, etc)

If you go to autism conferences just to feel “normal”.....

If you go to autism conferences just to drink

March 30, 2007

Great job!

On 3/30/07 2:03 AM, " analyzinggal " <mcstrom@...> wrote:

Ok...I just have to add to this...

If your child drinks an entire bottle of your perfume and

doesn't mind the taste, but hates cake...

If you are quizzed on a daily basis about Star Wars trivia...

If you are lectured on a daily basis about the strength of each

Yu-Gi-Oh card...

If you are quizzed everyday on math, the depth of the ocean,

the reason the sky is blue...

If you hear the playstation control hitting the wall because

you called your child to dinner...

If you allow your child to give the directions while driving

home and he says, " go right...go left...go left again... " to the

curves in the road rather than at intersections...

If a relative gets offended because your child loudly and frankly

asked them if they were expecting a baby while looking at their

soft slightly protruding tummy...

If your child describes people's race as " brown " and " Beige " ...

If you begin to worry that your 2 year old child is deaf because he

doesn't seem to ever answer you calling him, yet he runs in a panic

of excitement when he hears the barney music start on the TV....

If your child is obsessed with the titanic...

If the long line of cars actually stretches through 3 rooms because

your 3 year old child wants nothing else for Christmas...

If the toothpaste tube is always caked over and hard because the

cap is never to be found...

If you find a half dozen pairs of socks thrown about the house

because your child rips them off, along with shoes, everytime he

enters the house and must get a new pair when he goes back

outside...

If your child's very life revolves around yu-gi-oh cards, star wars,

the titanic, playstation games, and Mcs...

If, at least once a day, you find poop floating in a toilet with

absolutely no toilet paper floating with it...

If your child exits the shower and bubbles appear as he towels

his hair because of the shampoo he never rinses out...

If you make a suggestion to go somewhere and your child throws

himself face first into the furniture because of it...

If your child panics at the sight of an escalator...

If your child would rather watch a 3-D movie without the glasses...

If your child happily announces that his favorite colors at Halloween

are black and orange...

If your child wanders around aimlessly because you asked him to

put something on the end table and he finally places it on the kitchen

counter and feels proud of his accomplishment....

If your child screams because the sound of magic marker rubbing

paper is annoying and loud, yet he can stand 2 inches in front of a

blasting television...

If your 8 year old child throws a tantrum because, at a family picnic,

a fellow parent allows a 3 year old to slide on the rules of a game...

If every time you turn on your computer, you find all of your files and

folders in the trash can (macintosh)...

> >

> > If you come into the living room and realize your 3 year old has

> actually

> > MOVED the furniture because it was breaking up his long line of

> legos or

> > cars..

> >

> > If you have invested in a professional plumber's snake....

> >

> > If your keychain makes you look like a locksmith, you can tell

> which is

> > which by the feel and they never leave your body..

> >

> > When you start repeating today's stim phrases without realizing

> it..

> >

> > When you no longer hear the Revenge of the Sith music playing for

> the last 7

> > hours...

> >

> > When you can recognize and name every thomas the tank engine and

> all of his

> > frickin friends from 15 feet away and actually correct someone

> when they get

> > one wrong.

> >

> > When you know to save everything you are working on on your

> computer BEFORE

> > you lift one butt cheek because you know it will be closed the

> second you

> > turn around..

> >

> > When you no longer expect privacy in the bathroom and wonder where

> the hell

> > he is when you have it..

> >

> > When you can multitask yelling " stop licking the tv " , open the

> door for the

> > UPS guy who is delivering your $300 worth of new compounded meds,

> talk on

> > the phone to some insurance company idiot who is denying your

> claims, again,

> > and wipe peanut butter off the staircase railing at the same time

> and

> > haven't had coffee yet..

> >

> > When you drink to a friend's 10 year old having her first poop on

> the

> > potty...

> >

> > When it's easier to just sell your house and move than it is to

> keep

> > painting and cleaning poop off the walls..

> >

> > When you have to explain what those stains are on the walls and

> carpets to

> > the realtor and you forget not everyone has furniture bolted to

> the walls

> > until you see the look on his face...

> >

> > When the feeling in two of your fingertips goes away when it's

> cold because

> > your kid bit the living piss out of them when you were teaching

> him to

> > swallow pills 7 years ago...

> >

> > When you spend your summer vacation learning the peptide synthesis

> cycle..

> >

> > You know the fax number and health aide's name and birthday for

> all your

> > congressmen & senators...

> >

> > You have started a collection and filled more than 15 binders with

> > " procedural safeguards " from school meetings..

> >

> > When your 6yo son can tell you every single financing detail on

> getting a

> > new Chevy during Truck month - " 2.9% APR financing for approved

> buyers " ...

> >

> > When your son sees a car fire on the drive home one day and the

> next day

> > screams bloody murder for another car fire the next day, and every

> day for

> > the next week, because it was sparkly..

> >

> > When you know ketchup goes on ALL potatoes, including mashed,

> because it's a

> > potato after all...

> >

> > Next.

> >

>

March 30, 2007

Maybe Kim or can put the best ones in HuffingtonPost.com? Or Lenny could put them in the SAR?

I can definitely publish them in our Long Island Autism Conference Program, which has a resource section

with articles, poems, etc. That will be handed out in October.

On 3/30/07 6:48 AM, " penelope_fam " <p.ray@...> wrote:

I thought the same thing...quick, take full credit, Holly!

>

> Holly - Quick! Take full credit for these very, extremely funny lines

> because pretty soon we will see them all over the place! These are

> sooo good, you should publish them!! I haven't laughed this hard in

> a while. What's great about these, is that no matter what we think

> caused autism, or the best way to treat it? We ALL can relate!

> Sally

March 30, 2007

Oh sure, put MY head on the chopping blog why don't you? LOL. I

might just take a look at them and see what I can do. " The Foxworthy

Voice of the Autism Mom " might just be born.....

KS

> >> >

> >> > Holly - Quick! Take full credit for these very, extremely

funny lines

> >> > because pretty soon we will see them all over the place! These

are

> >> > sooo good, you should publish them!! I haven't laughed this

hard in

> >> > a while. What's great about these, is that no matter what we

think

> >> > caused autism, or the best way to treat it? We ALL can relate!

> >> > Sally

> >

>

March 30, 2007

LOL. Sorry. I couldn’t help myself. I think it would be a good “autism awareness month” thing.

I could post it on MY blog- but no one reads that but my family.

Maybe we could start a gameshow too ---- Are you smarter than an Autism Mom?

Question #1 How do you get a kid to take 30 supplements in one day?

Question #2 Where can you find the least expensive Epson Salt?

Question #3 What is the best way to get out of a birthday party invite?

Question #4 What is the schedule for Nick Jr?

Question #5 Where can you find a car seat for a 80 pound kid?

On 3/30/07 8:27 AM, " krstagliano " <KRStagliano@...> wrote:

Oh sure, put MY head on the chopping blog why don't you? LOL. I

might just take a look at them and see what I can do. " The Foxworthy

Voice of the Autism Mom " might just be born.....

KS

> >> >

> >> > Holly - Quick! Take full credit for these very, extremely

funny lines

> >> > because pretty soon we will see them all over the place! These

are

> >> > sooo good, you should publish them!! I haven't laughed this

hard in

> >> > a while. What's great about these, is that no matter what we

think

> >> > caused autism, or the best way to treat it? We ALL can relate!

> >> > Sally

> >

>

March 30, 2007

If you run a support group for parents, things get real busy in April

and October every year, we call this CSE season! April is when

parents are getting ready for next school year and October is when

the teachers call and ask about placements for kids.

> If you don't go to PTA meetings because the other parents

just don't understand...

> (and you can't go to SEPTA meetings because they are too depressing)

>

> If you know every Mcs in a 100 mile radius...

>

> If you hate springtime because that means CSE season...

>

> If you can invite every kid from your child's class to his birthday

party...

>

> If you are upset that Steve left and you never got used to Joe...

>

> If you pay $500 for a doctor's visit...

>

> If you have to fly to visit your child's doctor...

>

> If you feel like you know more than your child's doctor...

>

> If at Christmas time you have to spend $400 on gifts to 12 staff

people...

> (teacher, aide, aide, bus driver, bus aide, SLP, OT, PT,

Consultant, etc)

>

> If you know the ingredients in every vaccine...

>

> If you have heard of the phrase " Isn't that like Rainman? " ...

>

> If you know which Rice Milks contain Soy...

>

> If you have to ask the pharmacy for " extra " anti-biotics because

half of it ends up on the floor...

>

> If your UPS and FEDEX guys know you by name...

>

> If you turn into the Hulk when someone asks " why doesn't your kid

_______? " ....

> (stand still, look at me, answer me, talk, stop screaming, shut up,

sit down, etc)

>

> If you go to autism conferences just to feel " normal " .....

>

> If you go to autism conferences just to drink

>

March 30, 2007

Ah Kim you can handle it - you got it pretty good on the last huff

post, deep breaths, shoulders back and keep on blogging!!

> > >> >

> > >> > Holly - Quick! Take full credit for these very, extremely

> funny lines

> > >> > because pretty soon we will see them all over the place!

These

> are

> > >> > sooo good, you should publish them!! I haven't laughed this

> hard in

> > >> > a while. What's great about these, is that no matter what we

> think

> > >> > caused autism, or the best way to treat it? We ALL can

relate!

> > >> > Sally

> > >

> >

>

March 30, 2007

IAgain, please let me explain that I was in no way minimising or underdiagnosing the situation, the condition, or the families. I was rather laughing along and adding in that my NT boys were rather like wrecking balls around the house, too. It in no way insinuated that there was a parallel situation.

And please dont think his father doesnt appreciate the love and energy we are all putting into this. And, yes, we are working 24/7 to help him. Thanks for your kind advice.

Boy, oh boy!

I won't even guess at how many of us on this list were told by

doctors, "He doesn't talk because he is a boy."

We didn't believe it,

Carolyn

I dunno. I raised three NT boys as a single mom

and there wasnt a day that these things didnt occur. On top of

wrecking furniture, walls, leather interior of car, eating jacks,

putting cheerios up each others noses, legos in the vcr, they

had "male domination issues" or so my 8 year old told me... I was

living 'Please Dont Eat the Daisies' and learned to laugh as well as

cry. Now I am marrying a man and adopting his severely autistic ten

year old son as my own. He is amazed that I can stomach the

peculiarities of this darling handful in pull-ups, OC terror with

food and paper, head-banging, stimming. It's easy I tell him, "HE IS

A BOY". Boys are naturally difficult and contrary, its a healthy

part of them.

>

>No one said it was going to be easy. My advice: Get over it and

Love them More!!!!

>

>**************************************

>See what's free at http://www.aol.com.

>

>Nora Bunis -Stuart

>

>---------------------------------

>The fish are biting.

>Get more visitors on your site using Search Marketing.

>

************************************** See what's free at http://www.aol.com.

March 30, 2007

If you just say, " Yeah " when people ask, " Is he shy? "

> > If you don't go to PTA meetings because the other

parents

> just don't understand...

> > (and you can't go to SEPTA meetings because they are too

depressing)

> >

> > If you know every Mcs in a 100 mile radius...

> >

> > If you hate springtime because that means CSE season...

> >

> > If you can invite every kid from your child's class to his

birthday

> party...

> >

> > If you are upset that Steve left and you never got used to Joe...

> >

> > If you pay $500 for a doctor's visit...

> >

> > If you have to fly to visit your child's doctor...

> >

> > If you feel like you know more than your child's doctor...

> >

> > If at Christmas time you have to spend $400 on gifts to 12 staff

> people...

> > (teacher, aide, aide, bus driver, bus aide, SLP, OT, PT,

> Consultant, etc)

> >

> > If you know the ingredients in every vaccine...

> >

> > If you have heard of the phrase " Isn't that like Rainman? " ...

> >

> > If you know which Rice Milks contain Soy...

> >

> > If you have to ask the pharmacy for " extra " anti-biotics because

> half of it ends up on the floor...

> >

> > If your UPS and FEDEX guys know you by name...

> >

> > If you turn into the Hulk when someone asks " why doesn't your kid

> _______? " ....

> > (stand still, look at me, answer me, talk, stop screaming, shut

up,

> sit down, etc)

> >

> > If you go to autism conferences just to feel " normal " .....

> >

> > If you go to autism conferences just to drink

> >

>

March 30, 2007

you should re-coin the phrase, " I love someone with Mercury Poisoning!! " lol --file the copyright RIGHT NOW.

On 3/30/07, Holly Bortfeld <maximom@...> wrote:

Lol mine weren't any better than anyone else's and given that we all have, or will have, lived each and every one to some extent, they are for all!

Besides, if I had ever taken credit for anything, every autism group in the world would owe me royalties for "I love someone with autism" which I created in 1998! I got over it. J

From:

EOHarm [mailto:EOHarm ]

On Behalf Of S CollettiSent: Thursday, March 29, 2007 11:26 PM

EOHarm Subject: Re: OT: Autism: The Musical

Holly - Quick! Take full credit for these very, extremely funny lines because pretty soon we will see them all over the place! These are sooo good, you should publish them!! I haven't laughed this hard in a while. What's great about these, is that no matter what we think caused autism, or the best way to treat it? We ALL can relate! Sally >> If you come into the living room and realize your 3 year old has actually> MOVED the furniture because it was breaking up his long line of legos or> cars..> > > > If you have invested in a professional plumber's snake....> > > > If your keychain makes you look like a locksmith, you can tell which is> which by the feel and they never leave your body..> > > > When you start repeating today's stim phrases without realizing it..> > > > When you no longer hear the Revenge of the Sith music playing for the last 7> hours...> > > > When you can recognize and name every thomas the tank engine and all of his> frickin friends from 15 feet away and actually correct someone when they get> one wrong.> > > > When you know to save everything you are working on on your computer BEFORE> you lift one butt cheek because you know it will be closed the

second you> turn around..> > > > When you no longer expect privacy in the bathroom and wonder where the hell> he is when you have it..> > > > When you can multitask yelling " stop licking the tv " , open the door for the> UPS guy who is delivering your $300 worth of new compounded meds, talk on> the phone to some insurance company idiot who is denying your claims, again,> and wipe peanut butter off the staircase railing at the same time and> haven't had coffee yet..> > > > When you drink to a friend's 10 year old having her first poop on the> potty...> > > > When it's easier to just sell your house and move than it is to keep

> painting and cleaning poop off the walls..> > > > When you have to explain what those stains are on the walls and carpets to> the realtor and you forget not everyone has furniture bolted to the walls> until you see the look on his face...> > > > When the feeling in two of your fingertips goes away when it's cold because> your kid bit the living piss out of them when you were teaching him to> swallow pills 7 years ago...> > > > When you spend your summer vacation learning the peptide synthesis cycle..> > > > You know the fax number and health aide's name and birthday for all your> congressmen & senators...> > > > You have started a collection and filled more than 15 binders with> " procedural safeguards " from school meetings..> > > > When your 6yo son can tell you every single financing detail on getting a> new Chevy during Truck month - " 2.9% APR financing for approved buyers " ...> >

> > When your son sees a car fire on the drive home one day and the next day> screams bloody murder for another car fire the next day, and every day for> the next week, because it was sparkly..

> > > > When you know ketchup goes on ALL potatoes, including mashed, because it's a> potato after all...> > > > Next.>

-- M. Webster814-644-3564

Autism IS Treatablehttp://www.generationrescue.orghttp://www.putchildrenfirst.orgBe ashamed to die until you have won some victory for humanity. --Horace Mann

March 30, 2007

Thought of a few more...

When your kid doesn't allow you to put your elbow on the window ledge

or arm rest while riding in the car, and he keeps pushing it off from

the back seat, and when you try to put it back on when you think he

isn't paying attention....

When your kid doesn't allow a total stranger to put his arm across

the back of the seat in a public bus, you kindly say...he's autistic

and your are breaking the rules..as the man looks very perplexed back

at you...

When you child goes from crying and screaming one minute to laughing

uncontrollably the next mintue for no apparent reason...

> >>> > >

> >>> > > If you come into the living room and realize your 3 year

old has

> >> > actually

> >>> > > MOVED the furniture because it was breaking up his long

line of

> >> > legos or

> >>> > > cars..

> >>> > >

> >>> > > If you have invested in a professional plumber's snake....

> >>> > >

> >>> > > If your keychain makes you look like a locksmith, you can

tell

> >> > which is

> >>> > > which by the feel and they never leave your body..

> >>> > >

> >>> > > When you start repeating today's stim phrases without

realizing

> >> > it..

> >>> > >

> >>> > > When you no longer hear the Revenge of the Sith music

playing for

> >> > the last 7

> >>> > > hours...

> >>> > >

> >>> > > When you can recognize and name every thomas the tank

engine and

> >> > all of his

> >>> > > frickin friends from 15 feet away and actually correct

someone

> >> > when they get

> >>> > > one wrong.

> >>> > >

> >>> > > When you know to save everything you are working on on your

> >> > computer BEFORE

> >>> > > you lift one butt cheek because you know it will be closed

the

> >> > second you

> >>> > > turn around..

> >>> > >

> >>> > > When you no longer expect privacy in the bathroom and

wonder where

> >> > the hell

> >>> > > he is when you have it..

> >>> > >

> >>> > > When you can multitask yelling " stop licking the tv " , open

the

> >> > door for the

> >>> > > UPS guy who is delivering your $300 worth of new compounded

meds,

> >> > talk on

> >>> > > the phone to some insurance company idiot who is denying

your

> >> > claims, again,

> >>> > > and wipe peanut butter off the staircase railing at the

same time

> >> > and

> >>> > > haven't had coffee yet..

> >>> > >

> >>> > > When you drink to a friend's 10 year old having her first

poop on

> >> > the

> >>> > > potty...

> >>> > >

> >>> > > When it's easier to just sell your house and move than it

is to

> >> > keep

> >>> > > painting and cleaning poop off the walls..

> >>> > >

> >>> > > When you have to explain what those stains are on the walls

and

> >> > carpets to

> >>> > > the realtor and you forget not everyone has furniture

bolted to

> >> > the walls

> >>> > > until you see the look on his face...

> >>> > >

> >>> > > When the feeling in two of your fingertips goes away when

it's

> >> > cold because

> >>> > > your kid bit the living piss out of them when you were

teaching

> >> > him to

> >>> > > swallow pills 7 years ago...

> >>> > >

> >>> > > When you spend your summer vacation learning the peptide

synthesis

> >> > cycle..

> >>> > >

> >>> > > You know the fax number and health aide's name and birthday

for

> >> > all your

> >>> > > congressmen & senators...

> >>> > >

> >>> > > You have started a collection and filled more than 15

binders with

> >>> > > " procedural safeguards " from school meetings..

> >>> > >

> >>> > > When your 6yo son can tell you every single financing

detail on

> >> > getting a

> >>> > > new Chevy during Truck month - " 2.9% APR financing for

approved

> >> > buyers " ...

> >>> > >

> >>> > > When your son sees a car fire on the drive home one day and

the

> >> > next day

> >>> > > screams bloody murder for another car fire the next day,

and every

> >> > day for

> >>> > > the next week, because it was sparkly..

> >>> > >

> >>> > > When you know ketchup goes on ALL potatoes, including

mashed,

> >> > because it's a

> >>> > > potato after all...

> >>> > >

> >>> > > Next.

> >>> > >

> >> >

> >

>

March 30, 2007

Boy, oh boy!

I won't even guess at how many of us on this list were told by

doctors, " He doesn't talk because he is a boy. "

We didn't believe it,

Carolyn

I dunno. I raised three NT boys as a single mom

and there wasnt a day that these things didnt occur. On top of

wrecking furniture, walls, leather interior of car, eating jacks,

putting cheerios up each others noses, legos in the vcr, they

had " male domination issues " or so my 8 year old told me... I was

living 'Please Dont Eat the Daisies' and learned to laugh as well as

cry. Now I am marrying a man and adopting his severely autistic ten

year old son as my own. He is amazed that I can stomach the

peculiarities of this darling handful in pull-ups, OC terror with

food and paper, head-banging, stimming. It's easy I tell him, " HE IS

A BOY " . Boys are naturally difficult and contrary, its a healthy

part of them.

>

> No one said it was going to be easy. My advice: Get over it and

Love them More!!!!

>

> **************************************

> See what's free at http://www.aol.com.

>

> Nora Bunis -Stuart

>

> ---------------------------------

> The fish are biting.

> Get more visitors on your site using Search Marketing.

>

March 31, 2007

Hey Cristine, where can I get one of those bumper stickers???

HUGS!

Tammy

Mommy of 11

Re: Re: OT: Autism: The Musical

LOL--- you’re good at making lemonaid out of lemons :)I was distracted when I wrote it because my friend said the other day,“is your car the one with the –ask for vaccines without mercury- sticker?”I said “No- it says DEMAND vaccines without mercury. I’m not that nice.”On 3/29/07 5:58 PM, "foxhairdo38" <wendtworth68aol> wrote:

I liked it the other way, the irony! We should all drive around with this bumper sticker, "If you want a kid like mine, Demand a Vaccine With Mercury!!"> >>> >> >>> > If you're still listening to Dora the Explorer> >>> > Christmas music on the car CD,and it's March,you might> >>> > have a child with autism...> >>> > > >>> > > >> > >> > >> > > > > > >>

No virus found in this incoming message.Checked by AVG Free Edition.Version: 7.5.446 / Virus Database: 268.18.22/739 - Release Date: 3/29/2007 1:36 PM

March 31, 2007

My turn???

If you walk into the ER and they instantly ask you...CAT scan???....you might have a child with Autism!

If you go to the ER and the new person at the desk is waiting to call CPS because your child's forehead is black and blue.....you might have a child with Autism! (the triage nurse kept her from calling!)

If you need to be a certified gymnast to get your child dressed or undressed.....you might have a child with Autism!

If you have an assault and battery charge on your record because someone called your child stupid.........you might have a child with Autism! (long story short....I was discussing Autism in Wal Mart with a woman who wanted to know more. These 2 "women" walked by and said Oh Autism, that means he is stupid. I told the big mouth that she did not know what she was talking about so not to say anything. I turned back to my conversation and she said...like I said, that means he is stuoid. Well, the rest is history! I hit her, she hit the ground, and had hubby not been restraining me I would have beat her to a pulp! She caught me 30 minutes after a 2 hour meltdown....need I say more??? )

HUGS!

Tammy

Mommy of 11

Re: OT: Autism: The Musical

You guys are killing me. I really needed a laugh this evening, so thank you. Here goes.

If your child would rather have an empty plastic bottle more than anything else in this world…….

If your child digs through the trash like a junkie looking for a day old hamburger bun……

If you discuss bowel movements as casually as the weather – at the dinner table - size, color, frequency, consistency………

If your child’s mattress lies on the floor instead of on a bed frame…….

If you buy a 25 lb box of dairy substitute on the internet…….

If you don’t buy bread because you’re afraid the little junkie will discover it and tear through the whole loaf……

You have to watch your child to make sure he doesn’t lick the Purell off his hands……

Next……….

Pamela

"Courage is doing what you're afraid to do. There can be no courage unless you're scared."

Eddie Rickenbacker, top US fighter ace, WWI

No virus found in this incoming message.Checked by AVG Free Edition.Version: 7.5.446 / Virus Database: 268.18.22/739 - Release Date: 3/29/2007 1:36 PM

March 31, 2007

If you walk into your living room and there are 27 printouts of the

same Little Einstein character that have been colored & taped to the

wall, even 8' high with no ladder in sight, another 62 of the same

printout scattered around the floor (while your comp notifies you the

printer cartridge you just bought is empty)...

If you apologize to all the parents at the county 4-H public speaking

contest that your 7 yr-old child is the only one in the no food/drink

room with aromatic Mc's french fries to keep her quiet while big

sister gives her speech...

If you're at the 4-H speaking contest for your older NT child & you're

already privately plotting how you can get your younger child with 3

yrs to go to legally participate in the public speaking contest with

assistive technology devices...

-

March 31, 2007

You go girl!!!!

>

> My turn???

>

> If you walk into the ER and they instantly ask you...CAT

scan???....you might have a child with Autism!

>

> If you go to the ER and the new person at the desk is waiting to

call CPS because your child's forehead is black and blue.....you

might have a child with Autism! (the triage nurse kept her from

calling!)

>

> If you need to be a certified gymnast to get your child dressed or

undressed.....you might have a child with Autism!

>

> If you have an assault and battery charge on your record because

someone called your child stupid.........you might have a child with

Autism! (long story short....I was discussing Autism in Wal Mart with

a woman who wanted to know more. These 2 " women " walked by and said

Oh Autism, that means he is stupid. I told the big mouth that she did

not know what she was talking about so not to say anything. I turned

back to my conversation and she said...like I said, that means he is

stuoid. Well, the rest is history! I hit her, she hit the ground, and

had hubby not been restraining me I would have beat her to a pulp!

She caught me 30 minutes after a 2 hour meltdown....need I say

more??? )

>

> HUGS!

> Tammy

> Mommy of 11

>

> Re: OT: Autism: The Musical

>

> You guys are killing me. I really needed a laugh this evening,

so thank you. Here goes.

>

> If your child would rather have an empty plastic bottle more than

anything else in this world...

>

> If your child digs through the trash like a junkie looking for a

day old hamburger bun..

>

> If you discuss bowel movements as casually as the weather - at

the dinner table - size, color, frequency, consistency...

>

> If your child's mattress lies on the floor instead of on a bed

frame...

>

> If you buy a 25 lb box of dairy substitute on the internet...

>

> If you don't buy bread because you're afraid the little junkie

will discover it and tear through the whole loaf..

>

> You have to watch your child to make sure he doesn't lick the

Purell off his hands..

>

> Next....

>

> Pamela

>

> " Courage is doing what you're afraid to do. There can be no

courage unless you're scared. "

>

> Eddie Rickenbacker, top US fighter ace, WWI

>

> --------------------------------------------------------------------

----------

>

> No virus found in this incoming message.

> Checked by AVG Free Edition.

> Version: 7.5.446 / Virus Database: 268.18.22/739 - Release Date:

3/29/2007 1:36 PM

>

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Re: OT: Autism: The Musical

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