Stress

September 12, 2005

Danella,

I can totally sympathize with you. I know everyone tells us to decompress but it is so much easier said then done, when it seems we have everything piling on us at once.

I just located to Denver, left my home, my job, everything to care for my Mother as she is very ill. She not only has congestive heart failure, high blood pressure, enphazema, and she still smokes, and she is on oxyegen, she needs to have her gallbladder removed, but the Docs say they can't do it as she won't make it through the surgery. She is only 65 yrs, but looks 85 - bless her heart, she has been bi -polar/manic depressive for 35 years and has been on lithium. So I come out here to help her with her physical limitations, and then she goes into her manic state and she ends up in the mental hospital. She is very angry and sometimes violent in this state - no where the loving Mother that I know. Somedays she knows where she is at and who I am, and other days she is totally out of reality. Now the Docs are telling me she may never get any better than this - she has been on a drug called Lithium

for 35 years and after awhile and with age it just doesn't seem to work as well.

The Doctors are telling me she can no longer live alone - she needs 24 hour care - I have to work to support myself and she lives on SSDI. They now want me to put her in a nursing home that can care for the mentally ill or she will go into a insane assylam. This is breaking my heart, needless to say. I have 3 siblings - none of them will help me.

And to top it all off - I have medication that I need for blood pressure and effexxor for depression that I haven't had time or money to get. I mean the list is endless - my boyfriend decided that I don't love him as much as he loves so he left me in the midst of all this hell.

All I have right now is my faith in God - and that is what is keeping me going and sane.

Daily I get these crazy calls from my Mother telling me that I am going to put her away and throw away t he key - although she doesn't know what she is saying, it is gradly killing me.

I guess I am telling you all this, maybe to show you that the Good Lord is there for you and can pull you through if you ask...

I do try to take one day at a time, and then everyday I feel as though I am being tested for some unknown reason.

Just remember God will never give us anything that we can't handle - so hang on Girl and pray and ask for his help - he is right there with his loving arms reached out to help you.

And the other thing that helps me is coming here and venting to the gang. I haven't been on for over a year, but I have been a member since I think about 7to8 months after Deb and Liz started. This group is about the best bunch of people you will find.

TAke care of you in all the madness.....sometimes or most the time I forget to do that...

May God Bless and keep you in his loving arms...

Love, hugs and prayers

Marie

Motley <dmotley@...> wrote:

It’s impossible to get rid of all stress and difficult to learn to keep it to a minimum. Try to separate things into “things I can control” and “things I can’t control”. Then you have to work really hard to focus on the things you CAN control and not the things you can’t. When you have a lot of things that concern you, like you do now, you have to take them one at a time. For instance, your step dad: The immediate problem is a pulled muscle. That will heal, nothing for you to worry about. There’s a mass on his lungs—it is whatever it is, and you don’t know what that is yet, so don’t worry about that until they determine what the mass is. Sometimes you just have to divorce yourself from other people’s problems and not let them become yours. That doesn’t mean you don’t care,

it just means you don’t take it all on yourself.

Try baby steps first. We women tend to be control freaks and take on way too much.

De

----Original Message-----From: Hepatitis CSupportGroupForDummies [mailto:Hepatitis CSupportGroupForDummies ] On Behalf Of dannegrlSent: Monday, September 12, 2005 6:14 PMHepatitis Cfordummies ; b nSubject: stress

Ok I hear you all say let stress go.. Can some one tell me how?? For the most part I do ok and dont let things get too me. But lately it is impossible to NOT be stressed. Every since mom got home from the hospital the second time nothing seems to be going right. She stays depressed because she cant get her strength and energy back. I can understand that myself. But other things are adding to all the stress. Last night my step-dad went to the ER with chest pain. Luckly it is a pulled muscle BUT, they found a mass on his lungs. Plus my cousins wife died. She was ill for a little bit. She was going thru intensive chemo for cancer that had taken over her body. She turned 29 Friday. And today is her anniversary with my cousin. They have 3 girls the oldest one is only 12. This is part of life I know. But it is what is stressing me. Im having alot of trouble sleeping as well, so

that adds to all the pressure. The kids get on every last nerve. lol I love them so much. Im getting in a dont touch me mood again. so I have to pretend it dont bother me to have them sitting on me or sitting with me even. And trust me I truly love our cuddle time.GRRR ok well I vented. Sorry to you all.

d

dannella

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September 12, 2005