Bad day

February 4, 2003

> Ironically yesterday, day 29, was the day the Success Journal

talked about

> digging in one's heels during times of adversity. Last night I

found out my

> mother has been diagnosed with liver and pancreatic cancer, and the

prognosis

> is not good.

I'm so sorry to hear about your mother. Your family will be going

through a lot of stress during this time. Mental and physical.

Hopefully the BFL plan will help you deal better with this than your

otherwise would have. I'm sure there are some great support groups

out there for family members. A lot of hospitals have them through

there community services programs.

Good luck, my prayers are with you.

Debra

in GA

February 4, 2003

Dear Lorraine,

There is nothing that prepares you to hear news like that about your

Mom. I know. I still remember the day my Mom told me she was

diagnosed with brain & liver cancer. It's going to be an awfully

tough time for you. It's hard because you have to be strong for your

Mom at the same time the little kid inside is terribly afraid. No

matter how old you are it's tough. I gained a tremendous amount of

weight during my Mom's illness and for a long time did not take care

of myself. Please try to take care of yourself. Tell your friends

what a hard time this is for you and ask for their help and support.

Come here for help and support. We will be thinking of you.

Jan

February 4, 2003

Lorraine-

I am SO sorry to hear about your mom. I hope things work out for you. I am

glad to hear that you are planning on sticking to the plan. I seriously dont

know if I could if something like that happened to me. Good luck to you!

You'll be in my prayers!

~kimmah

Bad day

Ironically yesterday, day 29, was the day the Success Journal talked about

digging in one's heels during times of adversity. Last night I found out my

mother has been diagnosed with liver and pancreatic cancer, and the prognosis

is not good. As soon as I can get things settled here in Chicago, I'll most

likely be leaving DH temporarily and moving back to NJ to assist my mom. I

definitely went off the eating plan after I got the news; DH and I sat and

ate peanuts and then a bunch of M & Ms. However, it seemed more rote than

anything else; bad news = candy. Today I just feel sick to my stomach.

If anyone's been through anything like this, I'd appreciate any thoughts you

have. I'm planning on keeping on with the challenge; I can't see any reason

not to. The hardest part will be the mental challenge to keep up with the

workouts as I can't sleep at all (haven't been able to much since she went

into the hospital a week ago).

Thanks,

Lorraine

February 4, 2003

Lorraine,

I'm lucky enough to be able to say I HAVEN'T been through anything

like you are going through. I do believe though, that the times

when it is the HARDEST to keep up with your fitness are the times

that you need it the most. I think sticking with your plan will

probably save you mentally. Bill has a good quote about

when you are going through bad times, control the one thing you can

control- your fitness level. I'll see if I can find it.

good thoughts to you and your family.

Lynda

February 4, 2003

I'm so, so sorry for you. Please, take the time to take care of

yourself. You are going to need all the physical/mental strength you

can muster up to get through this. Please seek out all of the

support you can; friends, family, counseling,... See what the

hospital has to offer for support. They are there for the family,

too. Not just the patients.

You will be in my thoughts,

God bless,

Becky

> Ironically yesterday, day 29, was the day the Success Journal

talked about

> digging in one's heels during times of adversity. Last night I

found out my

> mother has been diagnosed with liver and pancreatic cancer, and the

prognosis

> is not good. As soon as I can get things settled here in Chicago,

I'll most

> likely be leaving DH temporarily and moving back to NJ to assist my

mom. I

> definitely went off the eating plan after I got the news; DH and I

sat and

> ate peanuts and then a bunch of M & Ms. However, it seemed more rote

than

> anything else; bad news = candy. Today I just feel sick to my

stomach.

>

> If anyone's been through anything like this, I'd appreciate any

thoughts you

> have. I'm planning on keeping on with the challenge; I can't see

any reason

> not to. The hardest part will be the mental challenge to keep up

with the

> workouts as I can't sleep at all (haven't been able to much since

she went

> into the hospital a week ago).

>

> Thanks,

> Lorraine

>

February 4, 2003

> Lorraine,

Like everyone else, I too am so sorry to hear what you are going

through. I agree that the best thing you can do for your mom and

yourself is continue with the program, eat healthy, and exercise. I

think it will definitly give you more energy physically and mentally

to deal with the situation. My thoughts and prayers are also with

you and your family.

Take Care,

Sheila

>

February 4, 2003

Thank you all so much for your encouragement and kind thoughts and words

regarding the situation with my mother. It means the world to me. I will try

to keep forging ahead and hope for the best.

Thanks again - best wishes to all -

Lorraine

February 4, 2003

Lorraine-

My heart goes out to you. My mom had pancreatic cancer and lost her fight

in 1998 at the age of 58. I can say it was the most horrific, yet life

changing ordeal in a positive way. I remember at the beginning feeling numb

and then quite angry. I think if you can stay with BFL thruough this it

will benefit you. I was so unfit and can never eat when stressed and wore

myself to a frazzel. If you can at least keep up with some exercise it will

help with the mental and physical stress. There is a wonderful and

supportive message board at the 's Hopkins site-all family members of

pancreatic cancer patients. I'll send a link when I find it. I'm an RN so

had plenty of " clinical " support. The support of the folks going through

the same thing on that board was invaluable. Anytime you need to talk, I'll

be here to listen : ). My prayers for strength and healing started today

for your mom and your family. Please let me know if I can help.

April 23, 2003

--OMG that is horrible!

So sorry!!!

April 23, 2003

Dear Jen,

Oh, you poor thing! The loss of a beloved pet is so hard, and having

another one of your pets being responsible for your loss must be 10

times worse! I hope you do not feel guilty if you are a little angry

with your dog at the moment, he didn't consciously do it, he was

probably proud to be doing his share of work to provide for the pack.

Of course, this doesn't invalidate any feelings of anger you might be

experiencing. Just after Easter too, oh, how terrible. I hope you

have a pic. of your bunny to remember it by, often it helps to

preserve the memories. Wish I could be more of a comfort.

Sincerely,

Cy

> Hi ladies,

>

> do any of you remember back in Jan when my cat died. well this a.m.

> my dog killed and ate half my rabbit. I am so upset!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

>

> Jen

April 23, 2003

Oh, I am so sorry to hear this. ( I am sure that is pretty hard to see. (

Sunshine

bad day

Hi ladies,

do any of you remember back in Jan when my cat died. well this a.m.

my dog killed and ate half my rabbit. I am so upset!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jen

April 23, 2003

Jen, I am *so* sorry this happened to you!!!

<<Big hugs!>>

JennA

> Hi ladies,

>

> do any of you remember back in Jan when my cat died. well this a.m.

> my dog killed and ate half my rabbit. I am so upset!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

>

> Jen

July 2, 2003

Dear Gordon,

I am so very sorry that your day was so painful both physically and

emotionally! I don't think there is anything I can say that would help make

that day

better or go away. I do agree there are times that this disease really kicks

the tar out of you, then you think it is going to get better, and it does it

again! Sure doesn't seem fair, does it.

Gentle Hugs & Prayers,

Carol M.

July 2, 2003

In a message dated 7/2/03 10:08:19 PM Eastern Daylight Time,

geliott@... writes:

> Keep praying for me.

>

> Gordon

>

You are in my daily prayers and I think of you often. Just reading what you

are going through to find care in a residential hostel seems that it is

putting you through more stress that is magnifying the flares and pain. I was

wondering until you find the permanent hostel could you possibly advertise in a

local newspaper for a live-in who has health care experience that would help you

until your wait and search is over. Here in the states it is common place to

see ads in the classified section of newspapers asking for live-in help for

24/7 care for exchange for room and bord and a stipend pay. I had a friend who

was a nurses aid and did this for years. She loved here job and there person

that needed her care loved her. When I was in my first year of college I

cared for a lady who had Alzheimer's. Her daughter lived with her and needed

the

help with her mother, so I went three times a day to assist for about 1 hour

in the morning 2 hours in the afternoon and 3-4 hours in the evening. It was a

great arrangement for us all. Also is there Hospice's in Australia. If so

you might look into that as well. I am sure you have gone all routes

available, but these were just some ideas that crossed my mind and though may be

helpful. Keep your spirits up and know that we all care much about you and are

praying for you! If you were in the states you would be bomb barbed with all

the

help you could possibly need from lots of us on the site! " )

You are an inspiration to us all!

July 2, 2003

Dear Gordon --

Hang in there if you can. You are doing so much that is worthwhile simply by

sharing your story with all of us. For one thing it is hard to feel sorry for

myself when I realize how much worse I could be. For another thing you give me

courage to keep going no matter what the odds may be.

Thinking of you often and fondly, Cheri

[ ] bad day

Yesterday I was flaring badly through the entire spine and chest and breathing

was even painful. The carer who came to shower me had much difficulty getting

me from my walker to the seat in the shower and afterwards. Ideally, two carers

were needed for days like that, as two nurses would sometimes be needed in

hospital to shower me. Afterwards, and I had been dressed and the bed made and

she left, I could do nothing except lay down, with the pain breaking through the

painkillers again. I was alone until Meals on Wheels came and after that I was

alone again. It made me realize even more that I need care to be on hand 24

hours a day. Someone to look in on me, heat up heat packs, bring me cups of

tea, and my meals in bed, as in hospital. So permanent residential hostel care

is the only way to go and I hope I do not have to wait too long.

One has too much time to think just laying there alone. I thought of my loss

of quality of life, dependent on others. I wondered whether I could endure this

severe pain and suffering for another twenty years. I know that PA does not

kill you, but sometimes I do wish that it was a terminal disease.

I feel a little better today. It does not help that I am depressed and

stressed over my future. I just want to move into a hostel and get settled.

So, I have opened up my concerns to you my friends who really understand and

it helps to lighten my burden.

Keep praying for me.

Gordon

July 2, 2003

Gordon, your post made me cry. I am so sorry I can't be there to chat and look

in on you! In my own way I am suffering, at home alone too, but I am

ambulatory. But I am depressed, and you may be too. If this is something you

are already managing, great, but if not, talk to your doc about it. I do think

that sharing how you are doing with the group is also helpful, and I'm glad you

did.

claire