Bad day

March 16, 2007

" my wife had a mild heart attack thursday (first)felt weird following

ambulance to hospital. so many things to do, but im wiped out "

Bruce,

My mother had what was at first believed to be a heart attack a while

back. Afterwards it turned out to be a huge muscle spasm that mimmicked

a heart attack.

My dad called the ambulance immediately and I ran upstairs to get some

things she said she would need, and I hadn't been up there more than a

minute when they showed up.

Next they were doing so quick treatment of her in the family room, and

they rushed her off to the hospital. Dad followed. I cleaned up plastic

wrappers and things that the paramedics had dropped, and then waited a

bit for a phone call.

They kept her for the next few days in the hospital (at first on

medication) and eventually released her.

It was a very stressful time Bruce, to say nothing of all the stuff

that follws after, like insurance and whatnot. So I have a pretty good

idea of what you are feeling.

But what can keep you going, I find, is knowing that the one you love

is getting the care and treatment she needs to get through this right

now, and that she is still with you.

We are here for you as well.

I'll pray for you and your wife.

Tom

Administrator

March 17, 2007

Thanks for all your thoughts.

It does help.

Dana is feeling better, so am I.

Yeah, I've explored a variety of emotions now. But need to focus on

something positive since I'm the caretaker.

She may need oxygen for remainder of her life, but maybe someday she

could try the implanted hear assist pumps that are becoming available.

Yeah guess i'm getting my chance to function during a crisis.

I did work on some ideas in my head for earning a living. If it works

out i will wonder why it took 48 hours squirming in a plastic chair

to think of it.

Bruce

>

> " my wife had a mild heart attack thursday (first)felt weird

following

> ambulance to hospital. so many things to do, but im wiped out "

>

> Bruce,

>

> My mother had what was at first believed to be a heart attack a

while

> back. Afterwards it turned out to be a huge muscle spasm that

mimmicked

> a heart attack.

>

> My dad called the ambulance immediately and I ran upstairs to get

some

> things she said she would need, and I hadn't been up there more

than a

> minute when they showed up.

>

> Next they were doing so quick treatment of her in the family room,

and

> they rushed her off to the hospital. Dad followed. I cleaned up

plastic

> wrappers and things that the paramedics had dropped, and then

waited a

> bit for a phone call.

>

> They kept her for the next few days in the hospital (at first on

> medication) and eventually released her.

>

> It was a very stressful time Bruce, to say nothing of all the stuff

> that follws after, like insurance and whatnot. So I have a pretty

good

> idea of what you are feeling.

>

> But what can keep you going, I find, is knowing that the one you

love

> is getting the care and treatment she needs to get through this

right

> now, and that she is still with you.

>

> We are here for you as well.

>

> I'll pray for you and your wife.

>

> Tom

> Administrator

>

March 17, 2007

" Thanks for all your thoughts. "

Bruce, I hate it when bad things happen to good people. You are a good

person, and if your wife is anything like you are, then she is good

too. Neither of you deserve this bad situation to strain and hurt you

both. I will still keep you both in my prayers.

Tom

Administrator

March 17, 2007

" I did work on some ideas in my head for earning a living. If it

works out i will wonder why it took 48 hours squirming in a plastic

chair to think of it. "

I hope they work out Bruce - let us know how things go (if you want

to).

>

> Thanks for all your thoughts.

> It does help.

> Dana is feeling better, so am I.

> Yeah, I've explored a variety of emotions now. But need to focus on

> something positive since I'm the caretaker.

> She may need oxygen for remainder of her life, but maybe someday

she

> could try the implanted hear assist pumps that are becoming

available.

> Yeah guess i'm getting my chance to function during a crisis.

> I did work on some ideas in my head for earning a living. If it

works

> out i will wonder why it took 48 hours squirming in a plastic chair

> to think of it.

> Bruce

September 19, 2007

Josie-

those days, when there doesnt seem to be a good enough reason to

keep living or trying or hoping are just the worst. And I

understand that being isolated is very key to getting into that bad

place in ones head.

Of course, the issue then is that you feel so bad that you cant

force yourself to figure out a way to be around anyone anyway... so,

its a closed circle at that point.

I was becoming pretty desperate myself, here in the middle of

nowhere, and close enough to suicidally depressed that I seriously

thought about getting rid of the guns around here. I still might.

I tend to feel that its in periods of emotional lucidity that I need

to follow through with these types of things. In order to protect

myself when it goes bad again, and it will.

I want you to know that from the outside, my life doesnt look half

bad. Im attractive, I have an amazing career history that I created

all by myself, I am artistic, I live on a 100 acre farm in beauty

and I still have potential clients tracking me down from out of

state, to do their landscape designs. I have an invisible illness-

CFS. So things can look good from the outside.

But on the inside I am just lost and lonely and desperately sad over

my moms cancer and now my companion dog's cancer as well. I have a

boyfriend who I moved away from to be here as a caregiver who is

giving up on me. And I think about that choice a lot. I watched my

business fail, I felt the disdain from people who cant see the

illness and I take everything to heart. Their anger, their

frustrations, their criticism and I believe it all somehow. I feel

totally worthless and like a waste of air.

And i end up just curled up in pain, not wanting to continue with

this life anymore. Because I dont see it getting any better. And

now, it may just be too late to salvage anything....I dont

know if i will ever recover financially. I dont think i can. And

that alone is enough to make me want to fall over.

So.

All i can tell you is to try to find a way to connect with others.

I have recently -through clients and contractors again. And just

the familiarity of that has been soothing.

You arent alone in being lost in all of " this thing we call life " .

At a dinner recently, with the clients and a contractor, we were

talking about all the really oddball charectors out here in the

country. Not in a bad way, just in a " aware " way. Because we are

all pretty odd ourselves too. All I could say was, " You know, its

just really hard to be Human " . And all three of them, in a

surprised way, agreed.

We never consider just how hard it is... all of it. And that we do

the best we can with what we are given. And thats about all anyone

can do!

I wasnt given much to work with- little education and no

encouragement. But I built a big (although fragile) life that got

toppled with CFS.

Life is just really hard.....no matter who we are or what we started

with or what we accomplished or didnt accomplish. You need to

remember that everyone else is suffering too, some terribly and

others intermitantly. But everyone is sufferring.

And then, try to connect with others. I know, i really do know,

what being housebound is all about. But try to find a way. this

place is good, but it still isnt the same as looking into someones

eyes and talking about anything- even inane stuff. Human contact

will save you.

BTW, do not let this cleaning woman take advantage of your need for

company or allow her to take advantage of you in any way. She isnt

acting respectful already. I hope this doesnt continue.

Josie, I am being tested for Lyme through IgenX labs soon. I have

to tell you that I am hoping it is negative, because I dont know

how I could afford the " cures " of the antibiotics, plus i get

terribly sick on them. But i am hoping it is positive, so that

there is SOMETHING to point at and maybe work on. Being powerless

to change your health is ..... well, very frustrating I know.

Keep reaching out is all I can tell you.

Tilia

>

> I'm feeling really awful today. I would like to know how the rest

> of you get through those days when you really feel like you would

> like to give up. I don't have family left, no friends here

either, and

> I think human contact makes all the difference. Of course, I

know

> that non supportive families are probably worse than none at

all.

>

> A couple of weeks ago I began treatment called Berg BRT,

> Body Restoration Technique, which I hoped would help me.

> It seems to be making me worse, and I am disappointed

> because it seems that everything I do to try to

> help myself ends up harming me. Since I began the treatment, I

> am so dizzy all the time that I am non-functional. I also have

> frequent spells in which I feel as if I am dropping or falling,

and I

> have a constant left sided headache.

>

> I have Cushing's Disease caused by a pituitary tumor,

> which I cannot get operated on because of MCS and

> numerous allergies. I cannot tolerate antibiotics or

anesthesia,

> and I would die during the surgery to remove the tumor. Lots of

> times, having the pit tumors removed does not help, as they grow

right

> back -- so perhaps that is just as well. The high cortisol

caused

> by the tumor leads to high blood pressure and diabetes. I cannot

> take blood pressure meds because of MCS.

>

> I also have FM.

>

> If that were not enough, I was diagnosed with Lyme a few weeks

> ago. It was almost too much bad news. Because of my MCS and

> allergies, I cannot be treated with antibiotics for Lyme.

>

> I am rarely well enough to leave my house, and I don't drive

often.

> Today a new maid was supposed to come and help me. I am paying

> her $25 per hour, which is the going rate here. She stopped to

run

> her own errands on the way to my home, and she was over two

hours

> late getting here. She did not call to let me know. When she

finally

> got here, she had not had lunch and was starving so we went out

in

> her car and I bought her a carry out lunch. After she ate, it

was quite

> late, and she really did not want to do any housework, just look

> things over.

>

> Josie

>

> ---------------------------------

> Need a vacation? Get great deals to amazing places on

Travel.

>

September 19, 2007

So sorry to hear.

I know it's hard, when I have bouts/ flare ups, I really cling to my

spiritual beliefs <>< There is nothing else that can help. I remember

the phrase, " your grace is enough... when I am weak, HE is strong.

That's all I can do, while in pain, and feeling like crap.

It sure helps to have that to go to when there is no other card to pull

out.

Thanks, Laurie

Behcets, hypothyroid, sleep apnea, bells palsy. adhd, menopause, hiatal

hernia, back pain/spasms.

September 24, 2007

I PRAY THAT THERE ARE BETTER DAYS AHEAD FOR YOU JOSIE;; KEEP YOUR CHIN UP; PRAYERS;;LOVE & ((HEALING HUGS)) DORT FROM MICH;U.S.A.PickPinkFlowers <haggisisscotsfood@...> wrote: I'm feeling really awful today. I would like to know how the rest of you get through those days when you really feel like you would like to give up. I don't have family left, no friends here either, and I think human contact makes all the difference. Of course, I

know that non supportive families are probably worse than none at all. A couple of weeks ago I began treatment called Berg BRT, Body Restoration Technique, which I hoped would help me. It seems to be making me worse, and I am disappointed because it seems that everything I do to try to help myself ends up harming me. Since I began the treatment, I am so dizzy all the time that I am non-functional. I also have frequent spells in which I feel as if I am dropping or falling, and I have a constant left sided headache. I have Cushing's Disease caused by a pituitary tumor, which I cannot get operated on because of MCS and numerous allergies. I cannot tolerate antibiotics or anesthesia, and I would die during the surgery to remove the

tumor. Lots of times, having the pit tumors removed does not help, as they grow right back -- so perhaps that is just as well. The high cortisol caused by the tumor leads to high blood pressure and diabetes. I cannot take blood pressure meds because of MCS. I also have FM. If that were not enough, I was diagnosed with Lyme a few weeks ago. It was almost too much bad news. Because of my MCS and allergies, I cannot be treated with antibiotics for Lyme. I am rarely well enough to leave my house, and I don't drive often. Today a new maid was supposed to come and help me. I am paying her $25 per hour, which is the going rate here. She stopped to run her own errands on

the way to my home, and she was over two hours late getting here. She did not call to let me know. When she finally got here, she had not had lunch and was starving so we went out in her car and I bought her a carry out lunch. After she ate, it was quite late, and she really did not want to do any housework, just look things over. Josie Need a vacation? Get great deals to amazing places on Travel.

February 5, 2008

Is it possible to keep things like that out of your

house? Another thing you can do is get a large solid

colored plastic bin (one you can't see through) put

the goodies in that and push it to the back of your

pantry. Out of sight out of mind. Maybe it will help

you not think about it when you go to the pantry.

--- DAWN COFFMAN <cherokee4co@...> wrote:

> yesterday was not a good day.i ate a whole box of

> cookies.i do not know

> why because it was a good day.i go to tops tomorrow

> so i will see what i

> have done to myself.hopefully it will not be as bad

> as i think.keep me

> in your prayers.

>

*~*~*~*

" You can deprive the body, but the soul needs chocolate " -Sapphyre

*~*~*~*

" Giving Up Is Not An Option ... " - Sapphyre

________________________________________________________________________________\

____

Never miss a thing. Make your home page.

http://www./r/hs

February 5, 2008

>yesterday was not a good day.i ate a whole box of cookies.

At least you got the chance to start anew today.

>i do not know why because it was a good day.

Humans eat for all sorts of reasons when we're not hungry - to mourn, to

celebrate, to ease boredom or stress. This is where a food journal comes

in handy - mark down everything you eat and drink, when you do it, *why*

you did it, and how you felt afterwards - dod the food fulfil its

funciton. Once you see why you'r eating when not hungry, you can work on

finding substitutes. I think our Links page has a url to a blank journal

check-list page that an come in handy if you don't want to do a bunch of

writing.

Sue in NJ

February 5, 2008

>Another thing you can do is get a large solid

> colored plastic bin (one you can't see through) put

> the goodies in that and push it to the back of your

> pantry. Out of sight out of mind.

In this house, we have a cardboard box for all the goodies hubby & the

kid eat, and it's kept buried in a corner of the living room near the

storage unit in the apartment. My safe stuff, like unflavored rice cakes

and baby carrots, are kept in a more convenient location. There's no

danger of them eating *my* food but there is a danger of the other way

around happening.

Sue in NJ

June 25, 2008

Perhaps you can work with the girlfriend and teach her the things she needs

to know about and do for Hunter, Kristi. Run it by your attorney.

Get well soon!

granny

On Mon, Jun 23, 2008 at 10:32 PM, Kristi <krististephens06@...> wrote:

> Today was such a bad day for me and I just need to vent to get some

> things off my chest. Let me just start by saying that I am a 25y

> single mom with two boys, wesley(2yrs.) and Hunter(9 months

> w/Ds,feeding issues, thyriod problems, and very delayed). I am

> currently trying to finish college so that I can teach Middle grades.

> Ok... Sunday I woke up with my right eye all crusted and red. So I

> went to the ER and they said that it was pink eye, I went to the

> pharmacy to get some meds to try and make it better. BUT that didn't

> happen, my eye started watering and all the nasties were coming out

> not to mention my eye was swelling. So the whole time I am scared

> that I am going to give it to Hunter.(wesley is with his dad) THe

> next morning(TODAY) I make an appointment to see an eye doctor and he

> tell be that it is pink eye but its more bacterial and that I need to

> add another eye medicine to help with the swelling and redness. SO I

> leave the doctor and go to walmart as I am deciding if I would rather

> go there or Walgreens to fill my meds, I see my son(Wesley). He is in

> his dads girlfriends truck( he swears that there is nothing going on

> that they are just friends), so I stop my car and get out and

> approach the truck and wesley is looking at me. She then sees me and

> puts the truck in reverse and drives away with my son looking at me

> through the back window. I try calling his sorry ass dad but he won't

> answer the phone and I know that she is talking to him cause I can

> see her on the phone. SO I pull over and call dispatch to see what my

> rights are. NOTHING>>>CALL YOUR LAWYER MAM! He(my son) is not

> supposed to be with anyone other than his father without me being

> notified not to mention he is not letting me talk to him nor

> answering any of my calls. I wouldn't be so mad if he would just say

> that she is his girlfriend and that they are together. But that was

> SOOOO WRONG of her to drive off and not let me see him. She doesn't

> have kids so she doesn't know the feeling. I call my lawyer and they

> tell me that because I just got the divorce back in Jan that I can't

> change anything. That I can only charge him with contempt and that

> she could charge me with harrasment because I came up to her truck.

> SO I have to sit back and let things die down before pursing

> anything. My biggest issue is that if my ex lies to me about my 2

> year old and his were abouts, he will lie about my fragile 9 month

> old. Not to mention that he goes to my lawyers office to see what is

> going on and he tells them that she lives their with him. And because

> I was so hurt and mad that she wouldn't let me see my son that I kept

> calling him wanting to talk to him. He could file charges against me

> for harassment becuase I called him repeatedly. Also that if I get

> charged with harassment twice I could lose my kids! SO the only thing

> I can do is prove him unfit. And I have to get a Doctor to write a

> letter stating that the father is not capable of having and taking

> care of him. I know that I don't trust him and that if I can't get

> the letter then I will have to sit and wait for something bad to

> happen to my son before the stupid court system will do anything. I

> don't work I take care of him and do EVERYTHING...HE DOES NOTHING!!

> He does pay child support on time but other than that its all about

> Wesley my oldest. He informed me that if I don't have Hunter ready

> 2morrow that he will file the papers for contempt and I will be

> introuble. But I can't do it out of 9months his dad has gotten him 4

> times over night and the last time was over 2-3 months ago. There has

> got to be some other way to allow his dad only supervised visits or

> something. HE has 2 other children 6 and 8 and they have been around

> him for 10mins his whole life. I know that they go to school and I

> didn't want them passing anything to him and then their dad never

> brought them around. He also owns a 24/7 mechanic shop that is his

> life other than baseball. IF he gets a call no matter what time, he

> goes to it. And if this happens while he has Hunter then he will just

> leave him their with her and what if something hapepens while he's

> gone? His tube comes loose or his button gets pulled out? She doesn't

> know what to do? ANd he hardly does himself?

> I'm so confused and mad and angry at our judical system! I really

> don't want to put my peditrican on the spot but what else is there to

> do?

> Kristi

>

--

Not for ourselves but for the whole world we were born

June 25, 2008

I'm with granny. No matter what you say, he is going to do what he wants

when he has the kids. Make it your responsibility to educate them...kindly.

It is in Hunter's best interest to make this a team effort. I have been in

this position, unfortunately as the girlfriend, and when the ex wife makes

his life difficult, it just calls the girlfriend to arms. They really

aren't the enemy, unless you make them so. She may be a decent person who

probably hears nothing but what a lunatic you are. Give her no reason to

think this. For the sake of your children, you MUST get along with him and

whomever he chooses to be with. As distasteful as it may seem, be sweet, be

helpful with their questions, and do everything you can to make the visits

successful. If he is as inept a parent as you say, the visits will probably

taper off to nothing anyway.

My life changed when I stopped hating on the ex wife and worked to be a

friend. It's not like you can change things with your " mind power " by

simply sitting and being angry. Doesn't effect them one bit. All it does is

hurt you and your kids. Believe me, even a two year old makes it " his

fault " when his parents don't get along. Marriage may not be forever, but

divorce certainly is. Choose to be happy and proactive. Use all the

resources you have to make things right, but keep the anger out.

Good luck, I'm praying for you and your boys.

Karla in Texas

Re: Bad Day

> Perhaps you can work with the girlfriend and teach her the things she

> needs

> to know about and do for Hunter, Kristi. Run it by your attorney.

>

> Get well soon!

>

> granny

>

> On Mon, Jun 23, 2008 at 10:32 PM, Kristi <krististephens06@...>

> wrote:

>

>> Today was such a bad day for me and I just need to vent to get some

>> things off my chest. Let me just start by saying that I am a 25y

>> single mom with two boys, wesley(2yrs.) and Hunter(9 months

>> w/Ds,feeding issues, thyriod problems, and very delayed). I am

>> currently trying to finish college so that I can teach Middle grades.

>> Ok... Sunday I woke up with my right eye all crusted and red. So I

>> went to the ER and they said that it was pink eye, I went to the

>> pharmacy to get some meds to try and make it better. BUT that didn't

>> happen, my eye started watering and all the nasties were coming out

>> not to mention my eye was swelling. So the whole time I am scared

>> that I am going to give it to Hunter.(wesley is with his dad) THe

>> next morning(TODAY) I make an appointment to see an eye doctor and he

>> tell be that it is pink eye but its more bacterial and that I need to

>> add another eye medicine to help with the swelling and redness. SO I

>> leave the doctor and go to walmart as I am deciding if I would rather

>> go there or Walgreens to fill my meds, I see my son(Wesley). He is in

>> his dads girlfriends truck( he swears that there is nothing going on

>> that they are just friends), so I stop my car and get out and

>> approach the truck and wesley is looking at me. She then sees me and

>> puts the truck in reverse and drives away with my son looking at me

>> through the back window. I try calling his sorry ass dad but he won't

>> answer the phone and I know that she is talking to him cause I can

>> see her on the phone. SO I pull over and call dispatch to see what my

>> rights are. NOTHING>>>CALL YOUR LAWYER MAM! He(my son) is not

>> supposed to be with anyone other than his father without me being

>> notified not to mention he is not letting me talk to him nor

>> answering any of my calls. I wouldn't be so mad if he would just say

>> that she is his girlfriend and that they are together. But that was

>> SOOOO WRONG of her to drive off and not let me see him. She doesn't

>> have kids so she doesn't know the feeling. I call my lawyer and they

>> tell me that because I just got the divorce back in Jan that I can't

>> change anything. That I can only charge him with contempt and that

>> she could charge me with harrasment because I came up to her truck.

>> SO I have to sit back and let things die down before pursing

>> anything. My biggest issue is that if my ex lies to me about my 2

>> year old and his were abouts, he will lie about my fragile 9 month

>> old. Not to mention that he goes to my lawyers office to see what is

>> going on and he tells them that she lives their with him. And because

>> I was so hurt and mad that she wouldn't let me see my son that I kept

>> calling him wanting to talk to him. He could file charges against me

>> for harassment becuase I called him repeatedly. Also that if I get

>> charged with harassment twice I could lose my kids! SO the only thing

>> I can do is prove him unfit. And I have to get a Doctor to write a

>> letter stating that the father is not capable of having and taking

>> care of him. I know that I don't trust him and that if I can't get

>> the letter then I will have to sit and wait for something bad to

>> happen to my son before the stupid court system will do anything. I

>> don't work I take care of him and do EVERYTHING...HE DOES NOTHING!!

>> He does pay child support on time but other than that its all about

>> Wesley my oldest. He informed me that if I don't have Hunter ready

>> 2morrow that he will file the papers for contempt and I will be

>> introuble. But I can't do it out of 9months his dad has gotten him 4

>> times over night and the last time was over 2-3 months ago. There has

>> got to be some other way to allow his dad only supervised visits or

>> something. HE has 2 other children 6 and 8 and they have been around

>> him for 10mins his whole life. I know that they go to school and I

>> didn't want them passing anything to him and then their dad never

>> brought them around. He also owns a 24/7 mechanic shop that is his

>> life other than baseball. IF he gets a call no matter what time, he

>> goes to it. And if this happens while he has Hunter then he will just

>> leave him their with her and what if something hapepens while he's

>> gone? His tube comes loose or his button gets pulled out? She doesn't

>> know what to do? ANd he hardly does himself?

>> I'm so confused and mad and angry at our judical system! I really

>> don't want to put my peditrican on the spot but what else is there to

>> do?

>> Kristi

>>

>

> --

> Not for ourselves but for the whole world we were born

>

June 25, 2008

---Hi Kristi,

I was in a similar situation years and years ago, and I had such

hatred for my ex, who married his girlfriend 3 months after we

divorced, and could hardly ever be bothered to see his son - our

child had such severe ADHD, and I was a working single mom, I was

constantly trying to find child care, he paid the bare minimum child

support,etc.

- the advice of trying to work with them though is sound. Because

your children DO see what is happening. And you will never have to

utter a word about what a louse of a father he is, because he will

show them, if he is one. Which, really, I don't think anybody would

want to give their kid a terrible father...I would think back on when

my ex and I were in love, and I could have never imagined that he

would act the way that he did. I learned that the court can't step in

on everything. And they can't make a father see his child. But your

children will see who is the bigger person in these situations. My

son is 24 now, and has recently talked of changing his last name to

mine and his stepdad's - because, as he says, we are his real family.

Patty

In , " Kristi " <krististephens06@...> wrote:

>

> Today was such a bad day for me and I just need to vent to get some

> things off my chest. Let me just start by saying that I am a 25y

> single mom with two boys, wesley(2yrs.) and Hunter(9 months

> w/Ds,feeding issues, thyriod problems, and very delayed). I am

> currently trying to finish college so that I can teach Middle

grades.

> Ok... Sunday I woke up with my right eye all crusted and red. So I

> went to the ER and they said that it was pink eye, I went to the

> pharmacy to get some meds to try and make it better. BUT that

didn't

> happen, my eye started watering and all the nasties were coming out

> not to mention my eye was swelling. So the whole time I am scared

> that I am going to give it to Hunter.(wesley is with his dad) THe

> next morning(TODAY) I make an appointment to see an eye doctor and

he

> tell be that it is pink eye but its more bacterial and that I need

to

> add another eye medicine to help with the swelling and redness. SO

I

> leave the doctor and go to walmart as I am deciding if I would

rather

> go there or Walgreens to fill my meds, I see my son(Wesley). He is

in

> his dads girlfriends truck( he swears that there is nothing going

on

> that they are just friends), so I stop my car and get out and

> approach the truck and wesley is looking at me. She then sees me

and

> puts the truck in reverse and drives away with my son looking at me

> through the back window. I try calling his sorry ass dad but he

won't

> answer the phone and I know that she is talking to him cause I can

> see her on the phone. SO I pull over and call dispatch to see what

my

> rights are. NOTHING>>>CALL YOUR LAWYER MAM! He(my son) is not

> supposed to be with anyone other than his father without me being

> notified not to mention he is not letting me talk to him nor

> answering any of my calls. I wouldn't be so mad if he would just

say

> that she is his girlfriend and that they are together. But that was

> SOOOO WRONG of her to drive off and not let me see him. She doesn't

> have kids so she doesn't know the feeling. I call my lawyer and

they

> tell me that because I just got the divorce back in Jan that I

can't

> change anything. That I can only charge him with contempt and that

> she could charge me with harrasment because I came up to her truck.

> SO I have to sit back and let things die down before pursing

> anything. My biggest issue is that if my ex lies to me about my 2

> year old and his were abouts, he will lie about my fragile 9 month

> old. Not to mention that he goes to my lawyers office to see what

is

> going on and he tells them that she lives their with him. And

because

> I was so hurt and mad that she wouldn't let me see my son that I

kept

> calling him wanting to talk to him. He could file charges against

me

> for harassment becuase I called him repeatedly. Also that if I get

> charged with harassment twice I could lose my kids! SO the only

thing