Guest guest Posted January 3, 2003 Report Share Posted January 3, 2003 That is REALLY sad. To have something wrong with a child, and not pursue a diagnosis. I would like to think she wouldn't do it with a sickness as opposed to something that she may perceive as a mental condition with the attached stereotypes and stigmas. ellen RE: From my friend whose son seemed autistic... My SIL is still there, but unfortunately her son is 8 now and it is not looking as if things are going to get any better for him support or therapy-wise. After he failed kindergarten the second time she did consent to putting him into a special ed class, but he still has no diagnosis. --- Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com). Version: 6.0.435 / Virus Database: 244 - Release Date: 12/30/2002 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 3, 2003 Report Share Posted January 3, 2003 That makes two of us. I knew something was wrong with Savannah and after a few conversations with a friend of mine in special ed and some research I could give it a name but no one would listen to me and evaluate her until about two years ago. I was called an over-reactive parent and that I was making mountians out of mole hills. After all the stupid shit I put up with from drs, our ped who I like told me at one point " She toliet trained, she can't be autistic " I was finally relieved when someone finally listened to me and seen her. Dr Fry (PhD) had to make phone calls on how to interpert her test scores because she has a remarkably high IQ but is very much on the spectrum. I know that I have three other kids on the spectrum. I am just a bit in shock with Dalton because I have not seen anything near his behaviour (almost 2) since Savannah at that age, and that was 6 years ago! I keep reminding myself that Savannah was just like him at that age, that it is going to get worse before it gets better, and that it will get better at some point (it did with Savannah and there was no early intervention there, in fact I had no idea what to do with her at the time because I had no idea what the problem was until a bit later, but now I know what to do so...) at any rate, I hope my logic isn't flawed here ;0). I was never in denial. I went through the totaly opposite. Complete and total frustration that no one would take me seriously and help me. The sad thing is, now that I have the dx for Savannah and I read everything that I can get my hands on and do what I have to do to help her and the other ones without " professional " help (unless it gets really bad then Dr Fry is a phone call away and he is always willing to help and he is so good with her) with ST, OT, PT, ABA and so forth that I really don't want anyones help. It also helps me to know that Dr Fry honestly believes that I have done more for Savannah than any therapist or professional could have and that I am the best teacher for her. I *know* that I am doing something right. I mean, the man stood up and told child protective services that and was willing to go to court and say that. Georga Hackworth www.ubah.com/F1549 Enter to win $50 in FREE books! Re: From my friend whose son seemed autistic... > C'mon. We've all been there! > > Salli I was never there! Honestly. I was never there. I KNOW I'm in the minority, but it's hard for me to imagine it otherwise. Of course, there was NO denying was different; I knew that as soon as I joined my first moms and babies group when he was four months old. The differences were glaring even then, and I *knew* it. So I really REALLY can't put myself in her shoes, as I've never worn anything remotely like them. :-( Jacquie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 3, 2003 Report Share Posted January 3, 2003 ----- I sent a thank you card to the woman who suggested my having Matt evaluated. He was diagnosed on a Friday and she came with me to his IEP on the following Monday. After that was when I sent the card, not just for coming to the IEP with me, but for getting the whole ball rolling in my head. It's amazing that sometimes it does take another person to get the ball rolling. Even if we aren't willing to really admit we needed it. When I tried to go back to work a year ago if when I finally gave into 's evaluation. My really good friend was watching them and she said that something just wasn't right. was way to angry and frustrated and well not a typical 3 year old. Oh boy did that blow me over. I called the school soon after for the evaluation. I'm not sure what goes through my mind but I have that magical age of 3 stuck in my head. was in early learning intervention till 3 and aged out without needing more services. I keep getting close to that age 3 mark, was evaluated right before 3 and now so is . Oh well I'm rambling. --- Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com). Version: 6.0.434 / Virus Database: 243 - Release Date: 12/25/2002 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 3, 2003 Report Share Posted January 3, 2003 ----- I sent a thank you card to the woman who suggested my having Matt evaluated. He was diagnosed on a Friday and she came with me to his IEP on the following Monday. After that was when I sent the card, not just for coming to the IEP with me, but for getting the whole ball rolling in my head. It's amazing that sometimes it does take another person to get the ball rolling. Even if we aren't willing to really admit we needed it. When I tried to go back to work a year ago if when I finally gave into 's evaluation. My really good friend was watching them and she said that something just wasn't right. was way to angry and frustrated and well not a typical 3 year old. Oh boy did that blow me over. I called the school soon after for the evaluation. I'm not sure what goes through my mind but I have that magical age of 3 stuck in my head. was in early learning intervention till 3 and aged out without needing more services. I keep getting close to that age 3 mark, was evaluated right before 3 and now so is . Oh well I'm rambling. --- Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com). Version: 6.0.434 / Virus Database: 243 - Release Date: 12/25/2002 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 3, 2003 Report Share Posted January 3, 2003 > I sent a thank you card to the woman who suggested my having Matt evaluated < i actually just saw the woman who had originally suggested autism for kailey. ironically, she was the one who just did trevor's preschool evals. anyway, i thanked her for being honest about kailey and apologized for not listening to her at the time " Something important to remember...we'll always be who we are. " - Mr. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 3, 2003 Report Share Posted January 3, 2003 Yea I remember you telling me that. The only thing he seems to be good for is giving me all that I ask for. I ask and he gives. Sad but I'll take that over a struggle Re: From my friend whose son seemed autistic... > , I don't think there is one good ped around here. Most know nothing and won't help. At least the ones I've found. Now here we start again with and Trevor, I'm so tired of the battle. I just wish someone else esp my ped would see what I do. < heather, unfortunately, dr mohassel is the ped i was referring to :'( " Something important to remember...we'll always be who we are. " - Mr. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 3, 2003 Report Share Posted January 3, 2003 > I can't speak for Sara, but if I had to guess for myself, I'd say that it > was just a strict observance of the rules: THIS is how babies are > *supposed* to be, but THAT is the way my baby is -- so something is wrong. > > Marc hid all my baby books when was less than a year old because he > said I was torturing myself with them -- but every month of the 'What to > Expect the First Year' was like a manual for some species other > than that my > baby was. YES. YES. YES. YES. YES. > mine had more demanding needs. I lived by his schedule -- when everyone > else was telling me HE needed to live by MINE. But that was impossible! And again. But I was doing AP and so " the rules " were different. I was being a GOOD MOTHER. -Sara. who will write her own post about this tomorrow. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 3, 2003 Report Share Posted January 3, 2003 > But I was doing AP and so " the rules " were different. I was being a GOOD MOTHER. -Sara. < yep, there was that too. altho i wasn't officially doing AP, hell, i didn't even know there was such a thing. i just thought it was natural and loving for my kid to be attached to me NONSTOP. oh well... " Something important to remember...we'll always be who we are. " - Mr. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 3, 2003 Report Share Posted January 3, 2003 > But I was doing AP and so " the rules " were different. I was being a GOOD MOTHER. Yea same here. I didn't know it had a name till I had the internet. was the official cloth diapered, co sleeping, extended breastfeeding poster child. Then again I think about it now and I know that without me parenting that way things could be much much worse. is a different child, I tried parenting him just like , he would have nothing to do with it. He would feed to feed and that was it. He's still not mister cuddle unless it suits him. He is going to be hard one to get through too. I just know it --- Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com). Version: 6.0.434 / Virus Database: 243 - Release Date: 12/25/2002 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 3, 2003 Report Share Posted January 3, 2003 I'm with you, I didn't think it was nice at all. Sounded to me like HOW DARE YOU. -- In parenting_autism , " The Hunny Family " <vhunnius@l...> wrote: > > > It's a nice note. I hope she is right, though I keep remembering that she > told me he didn't look at her much, and there was all that hand- leading and > spinning of toys. > > > > > REally? It doesn't sound like a nice note to me at all. To me, it sounds > defensive and a teeny bit reactionary. > > Of course, I may be wrong... but I would feel rebuffed if it were written > to me. :-( > > Jacquie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 3, 2003 Report Share Posted January 3, 2003 I'm with you, I didn't think it was nice at all. Sounded to me like HOW DARE YOU. -- In parenting_autism , " The Hunny Family " <vhunnius@l...> wrote: > > > It's a nice note. I hope she is right, though I keep remembering that she > told me he didn't look at her much, and there was all that hand- leading and > spinning of toys. > > > > > REally? It doesn't sound like a nice note to me at all. To me, it sounds > defensive and a teeny bit reactionary. > > Of course, I may be wrong... but I would feel rebuffed if it were written > to me. :-( > > Jacquie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 3, 2003 Report Share Posted January 3, 2003 I'm with you, I didn't think it was nice at all. Sounded to me like HOW DARE YOU. -- In parenting_autism , " The Hunny Family " <vhunnius@l...> wrote: > > > It's a nice note. I hope she is right, though I keep remembering that she > told me he didn't look at her much, and there was all that hand- leading and > spinning of toys. > > > > > REally? It doesn't sound like a nice note to me at all. To me, it sounds > defensive and a teeny bit reactionary. > > Of course, I may be wrong... but I would feel rebuffed if it were written > to me. :-( > > Jacquie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 3, 2003 Report Share Posted January 3, 2003 I wasnt there either. I wanted an answer for Greggory's problems and while I didnt want the answer to be autism and I cried when they told me I knew it was true. With Alec I cant even remember the month he was dx'd or really when. I just wanted answers! Any answer! Jacquie H Re: From my friend whose son seemed autistic... > C'mon. We've all been there! > > Salli I was never there! Honestly. I was never there. I KNOW I'm in the minority, but it's hard for me to imagine it otherwise. Of course, there was NO denying was different; I knew that as soon as I joined my first moms and babies group when he was four months old. The differences were glaring even then, and I *knew* it. So I really REALLY can't put myself in her shoes, as I've never worn anything remotely like them. :-( Jacquie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 3, 2003 Report Share Posted January 3, 2003 I wasnt there either. I wanted an answer for Greggory's problems and while I didnt want the answer to be autism and I cried when they told me I knew it was true. With Alec I cant even remember the month he was dx'd or really when. I just wanted answers! Any answer! Jacquie H Re: From my friend whose son seemed autistic... > C'mon. We've all been there! > > Salli I was never there! Honestly. I was never there. I KNOW I'm in the minority, but it's hard for me to imagine it otherwise. Of course, there was NO denying was different; I knew that as soon as I joined my first moms and babies group when he was four months old. The differences were glaring even then, and I *knew* it. So I really REALLY can't put myself in her shoes, as I've never worn anything remotely like them. :-( Jacquie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 3, 2003 Report Share Posted January 3, 2003 I wasnt there either. I wanted an answer for Greggory's problems and while I didnt want the answer to be autism and I cried when they told me I knew it was true. With Alec I cant even remember the month he was dx'd or really when. I just wanted answers! Any answer! Jacquie H Re: From my friend whose son seemed autistic... > C'mon. We've all been there! > > Salli I was never there! Honestly. I was never there. I KNOW I'm in the minority, but it's hard for me to imagine it otherwise. Of course, there was NO denying was different; I knew that as soon as I joined my first moms and babies group when he was four months old. The differences were glaring even then, and I *knew* it. So I really REALLY can't put myself in her shoes, as I've never worn anything remotely like them. :-( Jacquie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 3, 2003 Report Share Posted January 3, 2003 Not necessarily, . Believe it or not that makes me feel better. is a hard kid to explain. Very little speech, I think he's capable of it , he just prefers not too. He's stubborn like a mule, can be very nasty. He will hit you and stare you down. He'll dare you to pick him off of what he's doing. Then this is the same child that will walk up to Adeline and pat her and say nice, then walk away. He loves to sit on your lap and watch TV. Oh I don't know. Part of me wants to deny anything is wrong at all heather --- Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com). Version: 6.0.434 / Virus Database: 243 - Release Date: 12/25/2002 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 3, 2003 Report Share Posted January 3, 2003 > I wonder how she keeps her ped from finding out something's wrong? Stupid Ped? I went through 4 count them FOUR pediatricians in the first service I was with. I asked all FOUR, is there something wrong with my kid? She's almost 3 and not talking. " Some days I think she's autistic. Oh not as severe as an autistic child " (maniacal laughter, what did I know about autism? Just what I'd seen on TV. boy was I ignorant.) They kept saying, " If she was autistic, you'd know it. " Well DUH! But I had to change pediatricians to even get a speech eval done! And this is after I questioned these doctors for almost a year and a half!! They kept saying " she'll out grow it. " (meaning the speech delay.) So it's entirely possible the pediatrician isn't paying any attention to the child, and it wouldn't matter if the mom did ask. If she's not determined enough to push for testing, it won't happen until he hits school and then it's too late for early intervention. Tina Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 3, 2003 Report Share Posted January 3, 2003 > I wonder how she keeps her ped from finding out something's wrong? Stupid Ped? I went through 4 count them FOUR pediatricians in the first service I was with. I asked all FOUR, is there something wrong with my kid? She's almost 3 and not talking. " Some days I think she's autistic. Oh not as severe as an autistic child " (maniacal laughter, what did I know about autism? Just what I'd seen on TV. boy was I ignorant.) They kept saying, " If she was autistic, you'd know it. " Well DUH! But I had to change pediatricians to even get a speech eval done! And this is after I questioned these doctors for almost a year and a half!! They kept saying " she'll out grow it. " (meaning the speech delay.) So it's entirely possible the pediatrician isn't paying any attention to the child, and it wouldn't matter if the mom did ask. If she's not determined enough to push for testing, it won't happen until he hits school and then it's too late for early intervention. Tina Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 3, 2003 Report Share Posted January 3, 2003 > I wonder how she keeps her ped from finding out something's wrong? Stupid Ped? I went through 4 count them FOUR pediatricians in the first service I was with. I asked all FOUR, is there something wrong with my kid? She's almost 3 and not talking. " Some days I think she's autistic. Oh not as severe as an autistic child " (maniacal laughter, what did I know about autism? Just what I'd seen on TV. boy was I ignorant.) They kept saying, " If she was autistic, you'd know it. " Well DUH! But I had to change pediatricians to even get a speech eval done! And this is after I questioned these doctors for almost a year and a half!! They kept saying " she'll out grow it. " (meaning the speech delay.) So it's entirely possible the pediatrician isn't paying any attention to the child, and it wouldn't matter if the mom did ask. If she's not determined enough to push for testing, it won't happen until he hits school and then it's too late for early intervention. Tina Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 3, 2003 Report Share Posted January 3, 2003 Well, I consider myself pretty NT. Maybe I am wrong.....naw! But I just knew that something was wrong with both the boys. But actually I held out thinking that lonfer with Alec than with Greggory. Weird! Jacquie H Re: From my friend whose son seemed autistic... > I would not say that I *hounded* anyone but I made 4 seperate appts in 6 > months to discuss my concerns about , starting with his 12 month well > baby check. Like you, I was and patted on the head (although I was NOT > referred for therapy!) but unlike you I accepted the pats gratefully because > obviously there was nothing seriously wrong with my child. How very interesting that those of us who are clearly NT are so less astute on autism than those of us who are probably somewhere on the spectrum (for so I do place both Sara and Jacquie). So much for theories of empathy. Did you both just recognize something that went missed in your own babyhood? Salli Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 3, 2003 Report Share Posted January 3, 2003 Well, I consider myself pretty NT. Maybe I am wrong.....naw! But I just knew that something was wrong with both the boys. But actually I held out thinking that lonfer with Alec than with Greggory. Weird! Jacquie H Re: From my friend whose son seemed autistic... > I would not say that I *hounded* anyone but I made 4 seperate appts in 6 > months to discuss my concerns about , starting with his 12 month well > baby check. Like you, I was and patted on the head (although I was NOT > referred for therapy!) but unlike you I accepted the pats gratefully because > obviously there was nothing seriously wrong with my child. How very interesting that those of us who are clearly NT are so less astute on autism than those of us who are probably somewhere on the spectrum (for so I do place both Sara and Jacquie). So much for theories of empathy. Did you both just recognize something that went missed in your own babyhood? Salli Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 3, 2003 Report Share Posted January 3, 2003 Well, I consider myself pretty NT. Maybe I am wrong.....naw! But I just knew that something was wrong with both the boys. But actually I held out thinking that lonfer with Alec than with Greggory. Weird! Jacquie H Re: From my friend whose son seemed autistic... > I would not say that I *hounded* anyone but I made 4 seperate appts in 6 > months to discuss my concerns about , starting with his 12 month well > baby check. Like you, I was and patted on the head (although I was NOT > referred for therapy!) but unlike you I accepted the pats gratefully because > obviously there was nothing seriously wrong with my child. How very interesting that those of us who are clearly NT are so less astute on autism than those of us who are probably somewhere on the spectrum (for so I do place both Sara and Jacquie). So much for theories of empathy. Did you both just recognize something that went missed in your own babyhood? Salli Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 3, 2003 Report Share Posted January 3, 2003 > > It took some time to work through my denial. > > Tuna < > > > it took me about a year and a half... Funny, that's about how long it took me to work through the doctors' denial. ;o) Tina Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 3, 2003 Report Share Posted January 3, 2003 > > It took some time to work through my denial. > > Tuna < > > > it took me about a year and a half... Funny, that's about how long it took me to work through the doctors' denial. ;o) Tina Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 3, 2003 Report Share Posted January 3, 2003 > > It took some time to work through my denial. > > Tuna < > > > it took me about a year and a half... Funny, that's about how long it took me to work through the doctors' denial. ;o) Tina Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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