Guest guest Posted December 3, 2007 Report Share Posted December 3, 2007 It's the same little girl. There's just a new label on her. Can't cure me without fundamentally changing who I am. Unless you're doing that sloppy language thing where you say " autism " but mean " everything that bothers me about my kid, most of which isn't autism at all " . Catastrophizing much? Your daughter will never tie her shoes so this is the worst thing ever? Perspective, it's our friend, and I hope to God that your kid doesn't know you are so desperate for another kid in her body. Kassiane, sick of being polite for the comfort of others --- nevaehlopez6 wrote: > I am just trying to be real... You can speak to any > parent that has > just found out the their child has autism and they > can tell you that > to THEM at the moment it is the worst thing that can > happen and they > want to " fix " it. > > For me... Autism is very different. My daughter was > walking, talking > smiling, blowing kisses and then EVERYTHING STOPPED! > As a parent you > want to get this little girl back and you try > everything in your > power to do that. > > Trust me I know now that autism is not the worst > thing in the world, > but it is the worst thing in my world to know that > if something ever > happens to me right now my daughter would not be > able to dress > herself in the morning or tie her shoes by herself, > wash her hair. So > to me in MY world it is the worst. I love my > daughters and I wouldn't > change them for the world, but I cannot lie to you > and say that if > their was a cure for autism I wouldn't be the first > in line to get > it. And I will do anything to prevent my 14 month > old daughter from > suffering like Nevaeh has. > > > > > > Kassi, > > > > Oops, sorry I focused just on that one post. But, > I do see that > there was a general thing going on. > > > > You really did touch on something that's an issue > for parents vs. > the person who actually has autism. Parents feel > it's our duty > to " fix " everything while the person affected just > sees it as a part > of themselves and probably would be offended > thinking all these > people are walking around trying to " fix " it. When > I look at my > girls I can see aspects of their personality that > probably really are > attached to their autism. And I wouldn't ever want > those things to > change in them. For instance, they're both so naive > and innocent. > It's really sweet. > > > > My mom has bipolar disorder and there are very > wonderful things > about who she is that are actually probably part of > the disorder. > It's hard to balance all that good with all the bad > that comes with > it. But in her case it's very clear that you have > to do away with > the bad or the quality of her life suffers terribly. > I suppose I > keep my eye out for those sorts of things in autism > too. > > > > > > Re: Re: Autism: To > Vaccinate Or Not to > Vaccinate > > > > > > Debi isn't who I was referring to. It's the > general > > attitude. That wasn't even the email I was > responding > > to. > > > > > > [Non-text portions of this message have been > removed] > > > > > ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Be a better pen pal. Text or chat with friends inside Yahoo! Mail. See how. http://overview.mail.yahoo.com/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 3, 2007 Report Share Posted December 3, 2007 I am new hear so excuse me being a bit naive on this issue. Why does it seam like the women that have autism are very sensitive to any words that imply like we parents want to " change " our daughters? To be frank, I would do anything to help my daughter be a " typical " little girl. That doesn't mean I love her less. I just want the best for her and for her life. For her to have the " best " she needs to be able to function in this world. Especially since I won't be always here to take care of her. Why is this such a sensitive issue? If there was a magic pill that would help you function NT, wouldn't you take it? You would still be the same person underneath. Rebekah I just don't understand...... --- Kassi wrote: > It's the same little girl. There's just a new label > on > her. > > Can't cure me without fundamentally changing who I > am. > Unless you're doing that sloppy language thing where > you say " autism " but mean " everything that bothers > me > about my kid, most of which isn't autism at all " . > > Catastrophizing much? Your daughter will never tie > her > shoes so this is the worst thing ever? > > Perspective, it's our friend, and I hope to God that > your kid doesn't know you are so desperate for > another > kid in her body. > > Kassiane, > sick of being polite for the comfort of others > > --- nevaehlopez6 wrote: > > > I am just trying to be real... You can speak to > any > > parent that has > > just found out the their child has autism and they > > can tell you that > > to THEM at the moment it is the worst thing that > can > > happen and they > > want to " fix " it. > > > > For me... Autism is very different. My daughter > was > > walking, talking > > smiling, blowing kisses and then EVERYTHING > STOPPED! > > As a parent you > > want to get this little girl back and you try > > everything in your > > power to do that. > > > > Trust me I know now that autism is not the worst > > thing in the world, > > but it is the worst thing in my world to know that > > if something ever > > happens to me right now my daughter would not be > > able to dress > > herself in the morning or tie her shoes by > herself, > > wash her hair. So > > to me in MY world it is the worst. I love my > > daughters and I wouldn't > > change them for the world, but I cannot lie to you > > and say that if > > their was a cure for autism I wouldn't be the > first > > in line to get > > it. And I will do anything to prevent my 14 month > > old daughter from > > suffering like Nevaeh has. > > > > > > > > > > Kassi, > > > > > > Oops, sorry I focused just on that one post. > But, > > I do see that > > there was a general thing going on. > > > > > > You really did touch on something that's an > issue > > for parents vs. > > the person who actually has autism. Parents feel > > it's our duty > > to " fix " everything while the person affected just > > sees it as a part > > of themselves and probably would be offended > > thinking all these > > people are walking around trying to " fix " it. > When > > I look at my > > girls I can see aspects of their personality that > > probably really are > > attached to their autism. And I wouldn't ever > want > > those things to > > change in them. For instance, they're both so > naive > > and innocent. > > It's really sweet. > > > > > > My mom has bipolar disorder and there are very > > wonderful things > > about who she is that are actually probably part > of > > the disorder. > > It's hard to balance all that good with all the > bad > > that comes with > > it. But in her case it's very clear that you have > > to do away with > > the bad or the quality of her life suffers > terribly. > > I suppose I > > keep my eye out for those sorts of things in > autism > > too. > > > > > > > > > Re: Re: Autism: To > > Vaccinate Or Not to > > Vaccinate > > > > > > > > > Debi isn't who I was referring to. It's the > > general > > > attitude. That wasn't even the email I was > > responding > > > to. > > > > > > > > > [Non-text portions of this message have been > > removed] > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ > Be a better pen pal. > Text or chat with friends inside Yahoo! Mail. See > how. http://overview.mail.yahoo.com/ > Rebekah Phil 4:8 & #10084; ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Be a better sports nut! Let your teams follow you with Yahoo Mobile. Try it now. http://mobile.yahoo.com/sports;_ylt=At9_qDKvtAbMuh1G1SQtBI7ntAcJ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 3, 2007 Report Share Posted December 3, 2007 I am new hear so excuse me being a bit naive on this issue. Why does it seam like the women that have autism are very sensitive to any words that imply like we parents want to " change " our daughters? To be frank, I would do anything to help my daughter be a " typical " little girl. That doesn't mean I love her less. I just want the best for her and for her life. For her to have the " best " she needs to be able to function in this world. Especially since I won't be always here to take care of her. Why is this such a sensitive issue? If there was a magic pill that would help you function NT, wouldn't you take it? You would still be the same person underneath. Rebekah I just don't understand...... --- Kassi wrote: > It's the same little girl. There's just a new label > on > her. > > Can't cure me without fundamentally changing who I > am. > Unless you're doing that sloppy language thing where > you say " autism " but mean " everything that bothers > me > about my kid, most of which isn't autism at all " . > > Catastrophizing much? Your daughter will never tie > her > shoes so this is the worst thing ever? > > Perspective, it's our friend, and I hope to God that > your kid doesn't know you are so desperate for > another > kid in her body. > > Kassiane, > sick of being polite for the comfort of others > > --- nevaehlopez6 wrote: > > > I am just trying to be real... You can speak to > any > > parent that has > > just found out the their child has autism and they > > can tell you that > > to THEM at the moment it is the worst thing that > can > > happen and they > > want to " fix " it. > > > > For me... Autism is very different. My daughter > was > > walking, talking > > smiling, blowing kisses and then EVERYTHING > STOPPED! > > As a parent you > > want to get this little girl back and you try > > everything in your > > power to do that. > > > > Trust me I know now that autism is not the worst > > thing in the world, > > but it is the worst thing in my world to know that > > if something ever > > happens to me right now my daughter would not be > > able to dress > > herself in the morning or tie her shoes by > herself, > > wash her hair. So > > to me in MY world it is the worst. I love my > > daughters and I wouldn't > > change them for the world, but I cannot lie to you > > and say that if > > their was a cure for autism I wouldn't be the > first > > in line to get > > it. And I will do anything to prevent my 14 month > > old daughter from > > suffering like Nevaeh has. > > > > > > > > > > Kassi, > > > > > > Oops, sorry I focused just on that one post. > But, > > I do see that > > there was a general thing going on. > > > > > > You really did touch on something that's an > issue > > for parents vs. > > the person who actually has autism. Parents feel > > it's our duty > > to " fix " everything while the person affected just > > sees it as a part > > of themselves and probably would be offended > > thinking all these > > people are walking around trying to " fix " it. > When > > I look at my > > girls I can see aspects of their personality that > > probably really are > > attached to their autism. And I wouldn't ever > want > > those things to > > change in them. For instance, they're both so > naive > > and innocent. > > It's really sweet. > > > > > > My mom has bipolar disorder and there are very > > wonderful things > > about who she is that are actually probably part > of > > the disorder. > > It's hard to balance all that good with all the > bad > > that comes with > > it. But in her case it's very clear that you have > > to do away with > > the bad or the quality of her life suffers > terribly. > > I suppose I > > keep my eye out for those sorts of things in > autism > > too. > > > > > > > > > Re: Re: Autism: To > > Vaccinate Or Not to > > Vaccinate > > > > > > > > > Debi isn't who I was referring to. It's the > > general > > > attitude. That wasn't even the email I was > > responding > > > to. > > > > > > > > > [Non-text portions of this message have been > > removed] > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ > Be a better pen pal. > Text or chat with friends inside Yahoo! Mail. See > how. http://overview.mail.yahoo.com/ > Rebekah Phil 4:8 & #10084; ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Be a better sports nut! Let your teams follow you with Yahoo Mobile. Try it now. http://mobile.yahoo.com/sports;_ylt=At9_qDKvtAbMuh1G1SQtBI7ntAcJ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 3, 2007 Report Share Posted December 3, 2007 Hell no I wouldn't take it. I wouldn't be me. I'd be off dumbing myself down fooling around with makeup, have had much sex in high school like my " peers " , hidden my brains and opinions to fit the norm. The norm was NOT A PERSON I WANT TO BE. The norm is an intolerant human being who is taught that a woman is an object that happens to have a mouth. This is NOT ME. I DON'T WANT IT to be me. If there was a magic pill that would make you a man, would you take it? Cuz that's basically what you're saying: " Let'sc cut out a HUGE part of your identity and CHANGE IT to make people less uncomfortable in certain situations and make your earning power better! " Sure, and let's dye the whole rainbow yellow. Here are some blog entries my friend wrote on the subject: http://ballastexistenz.autistics.org/?p=218 <-Hey Watch It, That's Attached http://ballastexistenz.autistics.org/?p=57 <-Why Do You Think I Must Want to Be Like You?, originally addressed to " aspie supremacists " who feel that everyone else is just like them with a bunch of comorbidities, but the message rather applies to people who assume that autistic people are defective NTs, too. Her whole blog is good, really. So is the info library at autistics.org. My blog is infrequently updated, but plainly anticure. I don't want to be anything but what I am. If God doesn't make junk, why are people so hellbent on convincing me that's what I am? Kassiane --- Albrecht Rebekah wrote: > I am new hear so excuse me being a bit naive on this > issue. > > Why does it seam like the women that have autism are > very sensitive to any words that imply like we > parents > want to " change " our daughters? > > To be frank, I would do anything to help my daughter > be a " typical " little girl. That doesn't mean I > love > her less. I just want the best for her and for her > life. For her to have the " best " she needs to be > able > to function in this world. Especially since I won't > be always here to take care of her. > > Why is this such a sensitive issue? > > If there was a magic pill that would help you > function > NT, wouldn't you take it? You would still be the > same > person underneath. > > Rebekah > I just don't understand...... > --- Kassi wrote: > > > It's the same little girl. There's just a new > label > > on > > her. > > > > Can't cure me without fundamentally changing who I > > am. > > Unless you're doing that sloppy language thing > where > > you say " autism " but mean " everything that bothers > > me > > about my kid, most of which isn't autism at all " . > > > > Catastrophizing much? Your daughter will never tie > > her > > shoes so this is the worst thing ever? > > > > Perspective, it's our friend, and I hope to God > that > > your kid doesn't know you are so desperate for > > another > > kid in her body. > > > > Kassiane, > > sick of being polite for the comfort of others > > > > --- nevaehlopez6 wrote: > > > > > I am just trying to be real... You can speak to > > any > > > parent that has > > > just found out the their child has autism and > they > > > can tell you that > > > to THEM at the moment it is the worst thing that > > can > > > happen and they > > > want to " fix " it. > > > > > > For me... Autism is very different. My daughter > > was > > > walking, talking > > > smiling, blowing kisses and then EVERYTHING > > STOPPED! > > > As a parent you > > > want to get this little girl back and you try > > > everything in your > > > power to do that. > > > > > > Trust me I know now that autism is not the worst > > > thing in the world, > > > but it is the worst thing in my world to know > that > > > if something ever > > > happens to me right now my daughter would not be > > > able to dress > > > herself in the morning or tie her shoes by > > herself, > > > wash her hair. So > > > to me in MY world it is the worst. I love my > > > daughters and I wouldn't > > > change them for the world, but I cannot lie to > you > > > and say that if > > > their was a cure for autism I wouldn't be the > > first > > > in line to get > > > it. And I will do anything to prevent my 14 > month > > > old daughter from > > > suffering like Nevaeh has. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Kassi, > > > > > > > > Oops, sorry I focused just on that one post. > > But, > > > I do see that > > > there was a general thing going on. > > > > > > > > You really did touch on something that's an > > issue > > > for parents vs. > > > the person who actually has autism. Parents > feel > > > it's our duty > > > to " fix " everything while the person affected > just > > > sees it as a part > > > of themselves and probably would be offended > > > thinking all these > > > people are walking around trying to " fix " it. > > When > > > I look at my > > > girls I can see aspects of their personality > that > > > probably really are > > > attached to their autism. And I wouldn't ever > > want > > > those things to > > > change in them. For instance, they're both so > > naive > > > and innocent. > > > It's really sweet. > > > > > > > > My mom has bipolar disorder and there are very > > > wonderful things > > > about who she is that are actually probably part > > of > > > the disorder. > > > It's hard to balance all that good with all the > > bad > > > that comes with > > > it. But in her case it's very clear that you > have > > > to do away with > > > the bad or the quality of her life suffers > > terribly. > > > I suppose I > > > keep my eye out for those sorts of things in > > autism > > > too. > > > > > > > > > > > > Re: Re: Autism: > To > > > Vaccinate Or Not to > > > Vaccinate > > > > > > > > > > > > Debi isn't who I was referring to. It's the > > > general > > > > attitude. That wasn't even the email I was > > > responding > > > > to. > > > > > > > > > > > > [Non-text portions of this message have been > > > removed] > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ > > Be a better pen pal. > > Text or chat with friends inside Yahoo! Mail. See > > how. http://overview.mail.yahoo.com/ > > > > Rebekah Phil 4:8 & #10084; > > > > ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ > Be a better sports nut! Let your teams follow you > with Yahoo Mobile. Try it now. > http://mobile.yahoo.com/sports;_ylt=At9_qDKvtAbMuh1G1SQtBI7ntAcJ > ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your home page. http://www.yahoo.com/r/hs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 3, 2007 Report Share Posted December 3, 2007 Hell no I wouldn't take it. I wouldn't be me. I'd be off dumbing myself down fooling around with makeup, have had much sex in high school like my " peers " , hidden my brains and opinions to fit the norm. The norm was NOT A PERSON I WANT TO BE. The norm is an intolerant human being who is taught that a woman is an object that happens to have a mouth. This is NOT ME. I DON'T WANT IT to be me. If there was a magic pill that would make you a man, would you take it? Cuz that's basically what you're saying: " Let'sc cut out a HUGE part of your identity and CHANGE IT to make people less uncomfortable in certain situations and make your earning power better! " Sure, and let's dye the whole rainbow yellow. Here are some blog entries my friend wrote on the subject: http://ballastexistenz.autistics.org/?p=218 <-Hey Watch It, That's Attached http://ballastexistenz.autistics.org/?p=57 <-Why Do You Think I Must Want to Be Like You?, originally addressed to " aspie supremacists " who feel that everyone else is just like them with a bunch of comorbidities, but the message rather applies to people who assume that autistic people are defective NTs, too. Her whole blog is good, really. So is the info library at autistics.org. My blog is infrequently updated, but plainly anticure. I don't want to be anything but what I am. If God doesn't make junk, why are people so hellbent on convincing me that's what I am? Kassiane --- Albrecht Rebekah wrote: > I am new hear so excuse me being a bit naive on this > issue. > > Why does it seam like the women that have autism are > very sensitive to any words that imply like we > parents > want to " change " our daughters? > > To be frank, I would do anything to help my daughter > be a " typical " little girl. That doesn't mean I > love > her less. I just want the best for her and for her > life. For her to have the " best " she needs to be > able > to function in this world. Especially since I won't > be always here to take care of her. > > Why is this such a sensitive issue? > > If there was a magic pill that would help you > function > NT, wouldn't you take it? You would still be the > same > person underneath. > > Rebekah > I just don't understand...... > --- Kassi wrote: > > > It's the same little girl. There's just a new > label > > on > > her. > > > > Can't cure me without fundamentally changing who I > > am. > > Unless you're doing that sloppy language thing > where > > you say " autism " but mean " everything that bothers > > me > > about my kid, most of which isn't autism at all " . > > > > Catastrophizing much? Your daughter will never tie > > her > > shoes so this is the worst thing ever? > > > > Perspective, it's our friend, and I hope to God > that > > your kid doesn't know you are so desperate for > > another > > kid in her body. > > > > Kassiane, > > sick of being polite for the comfort of others > > > > --- nevaehlopez6 wrote: > > > > > I am just trying to be real... You can speak to > > any > > > parent that has > > > just found out the their child has autism and > they > > > can tell you that > > > to THEM at the moment it is the worst thing that > > can > > > happen and they > > > want to " fix " it. > > > > > > For me... Autism is very different. My daughter > > was > > > walking, talking > > > smiling, blowing kisses and then EVERYTHING > > STOPPED! > > > As a parent you > > > want to get this little girl back and you try > > > everything in your > > > power to do that. > > > > > > Trust me I know now that autism is not the worst > > > thing in the world, > > > but it is the worst thing in my world to know > that > > > if something ever > > > happens to me right now my daughter would not be > > > able to dress > > > herself in the morning or tie her shoes by > > herself, > > > wash her hair. So > > > to me in MY world it is the worst. I love my > > > daughters and I wouldn't > > > change them for the world, but I cannot lie to > you > > > and say that if > > > their was a cure for autism I wouldn't be the > > first > > > in line to get > > > it. And I will do anything to prevent my 14 > month > > > old daughter from > > > suffering like Nevaeh has. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Kassi, > > > > > > > > Oops, sorry I focused just on that one post. > > But, > > > I do see that > > > there was a general thing going on. > > > > > > > > You really did touch on something that's an > > issue > > > for parents vs. > > > the person who actually has autism. Parents > feel > > > it's our duty > > > to " fix " everything while the person affected > just > > > sees it as a part > > > of themselves and probably would be offended > > > thinking all these > > > people are walking around trying to " fix " it. > > When > > > I look at my > > > girls I can see aspects of their personality > that > > > probably really are > > > attached to their autism. And I wouldn't ever > > want > > > those things to > > > change in them. For instance, they're both so > > naive > > > and innocent. > > > It's really sweet. > > > > > > > > My mom has bipolar disorder and there are very > > > wonderful things > > > about who she is that are actually probably part > > of > > > the disorder. > > > It's hard to balance all that good with all the > > bad > > > that comes with > > > it. But in her case it's very clear that you > have > > > to do away with > > > the bad or the quality of her life suffers > > terribly. > > > I suppose I > > > keep my eye out for those sorts of things in > > autism > > > too. > > > > > > > > > > > > Re: Re: Autism: > To > > > Vaccinate Or Not to > > > Vaccinate > > > > > > > > > > > > Debi isn't who I was referring to. It's the > > > general > > > > attitude. That wasn't even the email I was > > > responding > > > > to. > > > > > > > > > > > > [Non-text portions of this message have been > > > removed] > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ > > Be a better pen pal. > > Text or chat with friends inside Yahoo! Mail. See > > how. http://overview.mail.yahoo.com/ > > > > Rebekah Phil 4:8 & #10084; > > > > ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ > Be a better sports nut! Let your teams follow you > with Yahoo Mobile. Try it now. > http://mobile.yahoo.com/sports;_ylt=At9_qDKvtAbMuh1G1SQtBI7ntAcJ > ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your home page. http://www.yahoo.com/r/hs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 3, 2007 Report Share Posted December 3, 2007 But wouldn't you want to overcome whatever disabilities came along with the autism? I don't know how severe your autism has ever been, but at least you can write about it and share how you feel when people keep wanting to change you. To whatever extent autism holds you back, wouldn't you like to be able to overcome it? When I told my daughter about her autism, I told her it was neither good nor bad, just a fact about herself, like having green eyes and brown hair. But we will never stop pushing her to be the best she can be, and that means improving her communication skills and controlling her emotions better. To do anything less for her would be a disservice. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 3, 2007 Report Share Posted December 3, 2007 But wouldn't you want to overcome whatever disabilities came along with the autism? I don't know how severe your autism has ever been, but at least you can write about it and share how you feel when people keep wanting to change you. To whatever extent autism holds you back, wouldn't you like to be able to overcome it? When I told my daughter about her autism, I told her it was neither good nor bad, just a fact about herself, like having green eyes and brown hair. But we will never stop pushing her to be the best she can be, and that means improving her communication skills and controlling her emotions better. To do anything less for her would be a disservice. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 3, 2007 Report Share Posted December 3, 2007 A lot of people can write about it. All that means is we can write. Did you read what I posted? Click on the link about autistic Aug Comm users and note all the people who DON'T SPEAK who express themselves just fine. Severe is a stupid word in autism. I don't know left from right. I ace standardized tests. I can't cook, which is fine because I have food allergies. I can ride in a plane alone. If the schedule changes, all hell breaks loose. I've been published. My sensory issues are to the extreme. I've won numerous gymnastics awards. The only reason I didn't get kicked out of school was I did so well on standardized tests so they needed my numbers. I've got epilepsy like woah, strabismus, migraines, piss poor fine motor skills. I can break down gymnastics skills into their smallest parts and explain them. In short, taking one part out brings WHO I AM crashing down. You think taking away perseveration would leave the perseveration on how gymnastics works and therefore my one consistently marketable skill if I ever get my foot fixed? No. Because girls my age DON'T DO GYMNASTICS anymore. People in general don't tear basic skills apart like a frame by frame video to improve the skill--5 gyms say they've never seen anything like it. That's an example. The sensory issues--I don't get dizzy. Take that away and you take away my easy success in tumbling, which lead to the above. Everything is connected. Try reading the blog I linked to, k? I don't dig stuff up for shits and giggles, am having trouble breathing, and am sick of having to defend my existence AND the existence of yalls children. ESPECIALLY SINCE NO WHERE DID I SAY DON'T HELP. I SAID CONVINCING PEOPLE THEYRE BROKEN SUCKS. At a conference I did not ONE autistic adult thought they were broken. 20% of the non autistics did. None of the adult autistics had been subjected to the current rhetoric however. I am not toxic, a tragedy, an epidemic, broken, junk, garbage, a waste of resources, or in need of drastic changes to be acceptable. Read it on that blog, read it on 99% of autistic blogs out there. So, I ask you, ARE WE GOD'S MISTAKES? Cuz I was told God doesn't make mistakes. I hope you dont see your child as a mistake. And I hope she doesn't see herself as a mistake. Kassiane now go read the damn blog, I didn't dig it up for MY health --- Tita wrote: > But wouldn't you want to overcome whatever > disabilities came along > with the autism? I don't know how severe your > autism has ever been, > but at least you can write about it and share how > you feel when people > keep wanting to change you. To whatever extent > autism holds you back, > wouldn't you like to be able to overcome it? > > When I told my daughter about her autism, I told her > it was neither > good nor bad, just a fact about herself, like having > green eyes and > brown hair. But we will never stop pushing her to > be the best she can > be, and that means improving her communication > skills and controlling > her emotions better. To do anything less for her > would be a > disservice. > > ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Looking for last minute shopping deals? Find them fast with Yahoo! Search. http://tools.search.yahoo.com/newsearch/category.php?category=shopping Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 3, 2007 Report Share Posted December 3, 2007 A lot of people can write about it. All that means is we can write. Did you read what I posted? Click on the link about autistic Aug Comm users and note all the people who DON'T SPEAK who express themselves just fine. Severe is a stupid word in autism. I don't know left from right. I ace standardized tests. I can't cook, which is fine because I have food allergies. I can ride in a plane alone. If the schedule changes, all hell breaks loose. I've been published. My sensory issues are to the extreme. I've won numerous gymnastics awards. The only reason I didn't get kicked out of school was I did so well on standardized tests so they needed my numbers. I've got epilepsy like woah, strabismus, migraines, piss poor fine motor skills. I can break down gymnastics skills into their smallest parts and explain them. In short, taking one part out brings WHO I AM crashing down. You think taking away perseveration would leave the perseveration on how gymnastics works and therefore my one consistently marketable skill if I ever get my foot fixed? No. Because girls my age DON'T DO GYMNASTICS anymore. People in general don't tear basic skills apart like a frame by frame video to improve the skill--5 gyms say they've never seen anything like it. That's an example. The sensory issues--I don't get dizzy. Take that away and you take away my easy success in tumbling, which lead to the above. Everything is connected. Try reading the blog I linked to, k? I don't dig stuff up for shits and giggles, am having trouble breathing, and am sick of having to defend my existence AND the existence of yalls children. ESPECIALLY SINCE NO WHERE DID I SAY DON'T HELP. I SAID CONVINCING PEOPLE THEYRE BROKEN SUCKS. At a conference I did not ONE autistic adult thought they were broken. 20% of the non autistics did. None of the adult autistics had been subjected to the current rhetoric however. I am not toxic, a tragedy, an epidemic, broken, junk, garbage, a waste of resources, or in need of drastic changes to be acceptable. Read it on that blog, read it on 99% of autistic blogs out there. So, I ask you, ARE WE GOD'S MISTAKES? Cuz I was told God doesn't make mistakes. I hope you dont see your child as a mistake. And I hope she doesn't see herself as a mistake. Kassiane now go read the damn blog, I didn't dig it up for MY health --- Tita wrote: > But wouldn't you want to overcome whatever > disabilities came along > with the autism? I don't know how severe your > autism has ever been, > but at least you can write about it and share how > you feel when people > keep wanting to change you. To whatever extent > autism holds you back, > wouldn't you like to be able to overcome it? > > When I told my daughter about her autism, I told her > it was neither > good nor bad, just a fact about herself, like having > green eyes and > brown hair. But we will never stop pushing her to > be the best she can > be, and that means improving her communication > skills and controlling > her emotions better. To do anything less for her > would be a > disservice. > > ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Looking for last minute shopping deals? Find them fast with Yahoo! Search. http://tools.search.yahoo.com/newsearch/category.php?category=shopping Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 3, 2007 Report Share Posted December 3, 2007 I think it's a complex issue. From what I get, and this is what I get, people with autism who say " accept, don't change " have met parents/people who obsess over every insignificant aspect of autism, like freaking out when their kid flaps from excitement or makes a guttural sound when she's enjoying a tv program. On the flip side, some people with autism don't get that autism is not just a state of being, it's *also* a set of clinical symptoms, such as diarrhea, seizures, inability to speak, motor delays, cognitive processing. The fact is, there's good & bad in every condition. My friend with breast cancer learned to trust in God, have patience, endurance, etc. Is breast cancer who she is? Difficult to say, it's a part of her. She now processes information from the result of a new way of thinking after her condition. Doe she wish she had never had breast cancer? Yes and no. She has come to appreciate the experience and positive changes, while wishing she looked different naked. If metals/virus/bacteria/what ever alters the way one would have existed, does it change who the person was? Yes. Is that person still the same? Yes and no. The other issue that we all need to understand, imo, is that none of us can look at it from the back end. In other words, if when getting my daughter's diagnosis at 23 mos I could have had a report saying if I do/don't do the following she will be a happy, independent, well-adjusted adult, then we could all kick back, pop a top and call it a day. But that's not the case. When my daughter was diagnosed, I didn't know if she would ever be potty trained. Is that the end of the world? Well, no, but it sure is a bad thing. Not because someone who isn't potty trained is bad, but because it makes life more difficult for the person & everyone around them. Reasons? Odor and health. I sat in front of an adult female with autism at an event and she stunk to high heaven from defecating in her diaper. It wasn't about ME it is about health. Having crap running down one's legs, chronic bladder infection, etc, is not a good thing. And it is very isolating for people around her, because I wouldn't want to be around someone with fecal odor any more than someone with autism & extreme food aversions would want to be forced to eat broccoli. If I could know at age 8 that if I do/don't do x-y-z Allie will learn enough math to be a functioning, independent, happy adult, then I could kick back & follow the report. But I don't have that, so I'm left doing what I can, doing nothing, and she will/will not learn functional math skills. It's parents' jobs to do this for ANY of our kids. We don't know the future. So we must do what we can to *help* our kids. Yes, there is a message people with autism who don't believe in treating autism need us to hear, IMO, and that is through helping show respect and dignity to our kids. Listen to them. As they age, allow them to have more control over their own issues, just like we would with typical kids. Show respect for who they are. Like with Allie, she gets IV chelation. The ND crowd have told me I'm torturing her, abusing her, etc. Yet she ASKS for the IV every 8 days after the last one. She was crying for it last week. I told her going in if she would give it 3 months then we'd stop if she didn't wanna do it any more. That's where I showed her some respect for her body and her wishes, while helping her. She is dumping metals like mad, and even better, has finally started growing and getting healthy. But according to ND people, there's no way my daughter would ever ask for such a thing or want it, I simply must be torturing her and that I'm imagining her foot growing for the first time in 5 yrs. What ever. I cannot respect my child by *not* helping heal her body. And, often, the autism decreases when the symptoms of autism are addressed. That's not my fault, that's who she is when she's healthy. Debi > > I am new hear so excuse me being a bit naive on this > issue. > > Why does it seam like the women that have autism are > very sensitive to any words that imply like we parents > want to " change " our daughters? > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 3, 2007 Report Share Posted December 3, 2007 I think it's a complex issue. From what I get, and this is what I get, people with autism who say " accept, don't change " have met parents/people who obsess over every insignificant aspect of autism, like freaking out when their kid flaps from excitement or makes a guttural sound when she's enjoying a tv program. On the flip side, some people with autism don't get that autism is not just a state of being, it's *also* a set of clinical symptoms, such as diarrhea, seizures, inability to speak, motor delays, cognitive processing. The fact is, there's good & bad in every condition. My friend with breast cancer learned to trust in God, have patience, endurance, etc. Is breast cancer who she is? Difficult to say, it's a part of her. She now processes information from the result of a new way of thinking after her condition. Doe she wish she had never had breast cancer? Yes and no. She has come to appreciate the experience and positive changes, while wishing she looked different naked. If metals/virus/bacteria/what ever alters the way one would have existed, does it change who the person was? Yes. Is that person still the same? Yes and no. The other issue that we all need to understand, imo, is that none of us can look at it from the back end. In other words, if when getting my daughter's diagnosis at 23 mos I could have had a report saying if I do/don't do the following she will be a happy, independent, well-adjusted adult, then we could all kick back, pop a top and call it a day. But that's not the case. When my daughter was diagnosed, I didn't know if she would ever be potty trained. Is that the end of the world? Well, no, but it sure is a bad thing. Not because someone who isn't potty trained is bad, but because it makes life more difficult for the person & everyone around them. Reasons? Odor and health. I sat in front of an adult female with autism at an event and she stunk to high heaven from defecating in her diaper. It wasn't about ME it is about health. Having crap running down one's legs, chronic bladder infection, etc, is not a good thing. And it is very isolating for people around her, because I wouldn't want to be around someone with fecal odor any more than someone with autism & extreme food aversions would want to be forced to eat broccoli. If I could know at age 8 that if I do/don't do x-y-z Allie will learn enough math to be a functioning, independent, happy adult, then I could kick back & follow the report. But I don't have that, so I'm left doing what I can, doing nothing, and she will/will not learn functional math skills. It's parents' jobs to do this for ANY of our kids. We don't know the future. So we must do what we can to *help* our kids. Yes, there is a message people with autism who don't believe in treating autism need us to hear, IMO, and that is through helping show respect and dignity to our kids. Listen to them. As they age, allow them to have more control over their own issues, just like we would with typical kids. Show respect for who they are. Like with Allie, she gets IV chelation. The ND crowd have told me I'm torturing her, abusing her, etc. Yet she ASKS for the IV every 8 days after the last one. She was crying for it last week. I told her going in if she would give it 3 months then we'd stop if she didn't wanna do it any more. That's where I showed her some respect for her body and her wishes, while helping her. She is dumping metals like mad, and even better, has finally started growing and getting healthy. But according to ND people, there's no way my daughter would ever ask for such a thing or want it, I simply must be torturing her and that I'm imagining her foot growing for the first time in 5 yrs. What ever. I cannot respect my child by *not* helping heal her body. And, often, the autism decreases when the symptoms of autism are addressed. That's not my fault, that's who she is when she's healthy. Debi > > I am new hear so excuse me being a bit naive on this > issue. > > Why does it seam like the women that have autism are > very sensitive to any words that imply like we parents > want to " change " our daughters? > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 3, 2007 Report Share Posted December 3, 2007 Not having autism does not equate to being normal. I've never had a dx, yet my friends/family would tell you I'm far from normal. LOLOLOLOL I didn't have sex in high school. I don't hide my brains/opinions. I don't think of myself as an object *most* of the time, but hey, I'm happily married! <g> I think everyone should be happy with who they are and am glad you are. Just wanted to point out you don't have to have a label to be off the beaten trail. Debi - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 3, 2007 Report Share Posted December 3, 2007 Not having autism does not equate to being normal. I've never had a dx, yet my friends/family would tell you I'm far from normal. LOLOLOLOL I didn't have sex in high school. I don't hide my brains/opinions. I don't think of myself as an object *most* of the time, but hey, I'm happily married! <g> I think everyone should be happy with who they are and am glad you are. Just wanted to point out you don't have to have a label to be off the beaten trail. Debi - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 3, 2007 Report Share Posted December 3, 2007 Kassi, you are great about helping and trying to weed out the " really needs help " vs " think about it, what does it matter in the big picture " stuff. But there are some ND people who scoff at any desire to help kids. Debi Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 3, 2007 Report Share Posted December 3, 2007 Kassi, you are great about helping and trying to weed out the " really needs help " vs " think about it, what does it matter in the big picture " stuff. But there are some ND people who scoff at any desire to help kids. Debi Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 3, 2007 Report Share Posted December 3, 2007 It isn't fair to lump neurodiversity advocates according to what Lenny Schafer and Best say, Debi. Not fair at all. You know damn well Im pro neurodiversity, which means ALL diversity, and I am PRO HEALTH. Autism got lumped in with the scary diarreah and stuff as a way to make Lenny and co able to seperate people they didnt feel bad about not listening to us, without knowing a blessed thing about us. You know me better than that, Debi. And I had probably the first " Celebrate Neurodiversity " shirt, in 2000. Kassiane pro progress anti cure <Debi> wrote: > I think it's a complex issue. From what I get, and > this is what I get, > people with autism who say " accept, don't change " > have met > parents/people who obsess over every insignificant > aspect of autism, > like freaking out when their kid flaps from > excitement or makes a > guttural sound when she's enjoying a tv program. On > the flip side, > some people with autism don't get that autism is not > just a state of > being, it's *also* a set of clinical symptoms, such > as diarrhea, > seizures, inability to speak, motor delays, > cognitive processing. > > The fact is, there's good & bad in every condition. > My friend with > breast cancer learned to trust in God, have > patience, endurance, etc. > Is breast cancer who she is? Difficult to say, it's > a part of her. She > now processes information from the result of a new > way of thinking > after her condition. Doe she wish she had never had > breast cancer? Yes > and no. She has come to appreciate the experience > and positive > changes, while wishing she looked different naked. > > If metals/virus/bacteria/what ever alters the way > one would have > existed, does it change who the person was? Yes. Is > that person still > the same? Yes and no. > > The other issue that we all need to understand, imo, > is that none of > us can look at it from the back end. In other words, > if when getting > my daughter's diagnosis at 23 mos I could have had a > report saying if > I do/don't do the following she will be a happy, > independent, > well-adjusted adult, then we could all kick back, > pop a top and call > it a day. But that's not the case. When my daughter > was diagnosed, I > didn't know if she would ever be potty trained. Is > that the end of the > world? Well, no, but it sure is a bad thing. Not > because someone who > isn't potty trained is bad, but because it makes > life more difficult > for the person & everyone around them. Reasons? Odor > and health. I sat > in front of an adult female with autism at an event > and she stunk to > high heaven from defecating in her diaper. It wasn't > about ME it is > about health. Having crap running down one's legs, > chronic bladder > infection, etc, is not a good thing. And it is very > isolating for > people around her, because I wouldn't want to be > around someone with > fecal odor any more than someone with autism & > extreme food aversions > would want to be forced to eat broccoli. > > If I could know at age 8 that if I do/don't do x-y-z > Allie will learn > enough math to be a functioning, independent, happy > adult, then I > could kick back & follow the report. But I don't > have that, so I'm > left doing what I can, doing nothing, and she > will/will not learn > functional math skills. > > It's parents' jobs to do this for ANY of our kids. > We don't know the > future. So we must do what we can to *help* our > kids. Yes, there is a > message people with autism who don't believe in > treating autism need > us to hear, IMO, and that is through helping show > respect and dignity > to our kids. Listen to them. As they age, allow them > to have more > control over their own issues, just like we would > with typical kids. > Show respect for who they are. Like with Allie, she > gets IV chelation. > The ND crowd have told me I'm torturing her, abusing > her, etc. Yet she > ASKS for the IV every 8 days after the last one. She > was crying for it > last week. I told her going in if she would give it > 3 months then we'd > stop if she didn't wanna do it any more. That's > where I showed her > some respect for her body and her wishes, while > helping her. She is > dumping metals like mad, and even better, has > finally started growing > and getting healthy. But according to ND people, > there's no way my > daughter would ever ask for such a thing or want it, > I simply must be > torturing her and that I'm imagining her foot > growing for the first > time in 5 yrs. What ever. > > I cannot respect my child by *not* helping heal her > body. And, often, > the autism decreases when the symptoms of autism are > addressed. That's > not my fault, that's who she is when she's healthy. > > Debi > > > > > > > I am new hear so excuse me being a bit naive on > this > > issue. > > > > Why does it seam like the women that have autism > are > > very sensitive to any words that imply like we > parents > > want to " change " our daughters? > > > > > > ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Be a better pen pal. Text or chat with friends inside Yahoo! Mail. See how. http://overview.mail.yahoo.com/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 3, 2007 Report Share Posted December 3, 2007 It isn't fair to lump neurodiversity advocates according to what Lenny Schafer and Best say, Debi. Not fair at all. You know damn well Im pro neurodiversity, which means ALL diversity, and I am PRO HEALTH. Autism got lumped in with the scary diarreah and stuff as a way to make Lenny and co able to seperate people they didnt feel bad about not listening to us, without knowing a blessed thing about us. You know me better than that, Debi. And I had probably the first " Celebrate Neurodiversity " shirt, in 2000. Kassiane pro progress anti cure <Debi> wrote: > I think it's a complex issue. From what I get, and > this is what I get, > people with autism who say " accept, don't change " > have met > parents/people who obsess over every insignificant > aspect of autism, > like freaking out when their kid flaps from > excitement or makes a > guttural sound when she's enjoying a tv program. On > the flip side, > some people with autism don't get that autism is not > just a state of > being, it's *also* a set of clinical symptoms, such > as diarrhea, > seizures, inability to speak, motor delays, > cognitive processing. > > The fact is, there's good & bad in every condition. > My friend with > breast cancer learned to trust in God, have > patience, endurance, etc. > Is breast cancer who she is? Difficult to say, it's > a part of her. She > now processes information from the result of a new > way of thinking > after her condition. Doe she wish she had never had > breast cancer? Yes > and no. She has come to appreciate the experience > and positive > changes, while wishing she looked different naked. > > If metals/virus/bacteria/what ever alters the way > one would have > existed, does it change who the person was? Yes. Is > that person still > the same? Yes and no. > > The other issue that we all need to understand, imo, > is that none of > us can look at it from the back end. In other words, > if when getting > my daughter's diagnosis at 23 mos I could have had a > report saying if > I do/don't do the following she will be a happy, > independent, > well-adjusted adult, then we could all kick back, > pop a top and call > it a day. But that's not the case. When my daughter > was diagnosed, I > didn't know if she would ever be potty trained. Is > that the end of the > world? Well, no, but it sure is a bad thing. Not > because someone who > isn't potty trained is bad, but because it makes > life more difficult > for the person & everyone around them. Reasons? Odor > and health. I sat > in front of an adult female with autism at an event > and she stunk to > high heaven from defecating in her diaper. It wasn't > about ME it is > about health. Having crap running down one's legs, > chronic bladder > infection, etc, is not a good thing. And it is very > isolating for > people around her, because I wouldn't want to be > around someone with > fecal odor any more than someone with autism & > extreme food aversions > would want to be forced to eat broccoli. > > If I could know at age 8 that if I do/don't do x-y-z > Allie will learn > enough math to be a functioning, independent, happy > adult, then I > could kick back & follow the report. But I don't > have that, so I'm > left doing what I can, doing nothing, and she > will/will not learn > functional math skills. > > It's parents' jobs to do this for ANY of our kids. > We don't know the > future. So we must do what we can to *help* our > kids. Yes, there is a > message people with autism who don't believe in > treating autism need > us to hear, IMO, and that is through helping show > respect and dignity > to our kids. Listen to them. As they age, allow them > to have more > control over their own issues, just like we would > with typical kids. > Show respect for who they are. Like with Allie, she > gets IV chelation. > The ND crowd have told me I'm torturing her, abusing > her, etc. Yet she > ASKS for the IV every 8 days after the last one. She > was crying for it > last week. I told her going in if she would give it > 3 months then we'd > stop if she didn't wanna do it any more. That's > where I showed her > some respect for her body and her wishes, while > helping her. She is > dumping metals like mad, and even better, has > finally started growing > and getting healthy. But according to ND people, > there's no way my > daughter would ever ask for such a thing or want it, > I simply must be > torturing her and that I'm imagining her foot > growing for the first > time in 5 yrs. What ever. > > I cannot respect my child by *not* helping heal her > body. And, often, > the autism decreases when the symptoms of autism are > addressed. That's > not my fault, that's who she is when she's healthy. > > Debi > > > > > > > I am new hear so excuse me being a bit naive on > this > > issue. > > > > Why does it seam like the women that have autism > are > > very sensitive to any words that imply like we > parents > > want to " change " our daughters? > > > > > > ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Be a better pen pal. Text or chat with friends inside Yahoo! Mail. See how. http://overview.mail.yahoo.com/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 3, 2007 Report Share Posted December 3, 2007 In MY family, being off the beaten trail was dangerous. I'm glad you were (seriously. I don't like the beaten trail). My parents didn't stand for it, but I'm more stubborn than they are... Following family pressure Id have been a cheerleader, partied a lot, gotten Bs and Cs, married rich, and had a lot of babies & been arm candy. Nooooo thank yooooou. It was how we were raised, " Get the man with the 1karat diamond with whom you'll have pretty babies " , BLECH. Kassiane --- Debi wrote: > Not having autism does not equate to being normal. > I've never had a > dx, yet my friends/family would tell you I'm far > from normal. > LOLOLOLOL I didn't have sex in high school. I don't > hide my > brains/opinions. I don't think of myself as an > object *most* of the > time, but hey, I'm happily married! <g> > > I think everyone should be happy with who they are > and am glad you > are. Just wanted to point out you don't have to have > a label to be off > the beaten trail. > > Debi > > - > > ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Get easy, one-click access to your favorites. Make Yahoo! your homepage. http://www.yahoo.com/r/hs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 3, 2007 Report Share Posted December 3, 2007 In MY family, being off the beaten trail was dangerous. I'm glad you were (seriously. I don't like the beaten trail). My parents didn't stand for it, but I'm more stubborn than they are... Following family pressure Id have been a cheerleader, partied a lot, gotten Bs and Cs, married rich, and had a lot of babies & been arm candy. Nooooo thank yooooou. It was how we were raised, " Get the man with the 1karat diamond with whom you'll have pretty babies " , BLECH. Kassiane --- Debi wrote: > Not having autism does not equate to being normal. > I've never had a > dx, yet my friends/family would tell you I'm far > from normal. > LOLOLOLOL I didn't have sex in high school. I don't > hide my > brains/opinions. I don't think of myself as an > object *most* of the > time, but hey, I'm happily married! <g> > > I think everyone should be happy with who they are > and am glad you > are. Just wanted to point out you don't have to have > a label to be off > the beaten trail. > > Debi > > - > > ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Get easy, one-click access to your favorites. Make Yahoo! your homepage. http://www.yahoo.com/r/hs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 3, 2007 Report Share Posted December 3, 2007 None of the ND people Ive worked with are anti help. And I know a lot of the " big players " so to speak. No one wants a kid to live with crippling bowel problems, massive seizures or pain. Nor is anyone against teaching kids how to communicate...this is where we run into problems I think, is most ND people are " communication is communication " , be it speech, FC or independent typing, or some other AAC, while a lot of nonND want typical speech. I'm all for learning and health and the method of communication that WORKS. " Typical speech " is unrealistic (have any of y'all heard me talk? It is NOT typical) and it's unfair. And I am WAY in favor of advocacy skills and daily living skills. Those are more important than " normal " , especially if our concept of " normal " broadens (which, in the purest form, is essentially what the concept of neurodiversity IS--that brain & cognition differences are NORMAL). Kassiane --- Debi wrote: > Kassi, you are great about helping and trying to > weed out the " really > needs help " vs " think about it, what does it matter > in the big > picture " stuff. But there are some ND people who > scoff at any desire > to help kids. > > Debi > > > > ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Be a better pen pal. Text or chat with friends inside Yahoo! Mail. See how. http://overview.mail.yahoo.com/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 3, 2007 Report Share Posted December 3, 2007 None of the ND people Ive worked with are anti help. And I know a lot of the " big players " so to speak. No one wants a kid to live with crippling bowel problems, massive seizures or pain. Nor is anyone against teaching kids how to communicate...this is where we run into problems I think, is most ND people are " communication is communication " , be it speech, FC or independent typing, or some other AAC, while a lot of nonND want typical speech. I'm all for learning and health and the method of communication that WORKS. " Typical speech " is unrealistic (have any of y'all heard me talk? It is NOT typical) and it's unfair. And I am WAY in favor of advocacy skills and daily living skills. Those are more important than " normal " , especially if our concept of " normal " broadens (which, in the purest form, is essentially what the concept of neurodiversity IS--that brain & cognition differences are NORMAL). Kassiane --- Debi wrote: > Kassi, you are great about helping and trying to > weed out the " really > needs help " vs " think about it, what does it matter > in the big > picture " stuff. But there are some ND people who > scoff at any desire > to help kids. > > Debi > > > > ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Be a better pen pal. Text or chat with friends inside Yahoo! Mail. See how. http://overview.mail.yahoo.com/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 3, 2007 Report Share Posted December 3, 2007 Thank you, I liked how you put it. Rebekah --- Kassi wrote: > It isn't fair to lump neurodiversity advocates > according to what Lenny Schafer and Best say, > Debi. Not fair at all. > > You know damn well Im pro neurodiversity, which > means > ALL diversity, and I am PRO HEALTH. > > Autism got lumped in with the scary diarreah and > stuff > as a way to make Lenny and co able to seperate > people > they didnt feel bad about not listening to us, > without > knowing a blessed thing about us. > > You know me better than that, Debi. And I had > probably > the first " Celebrate Neurodiversity " shirt, in 2000. > > Kassiane > pro progress anti cure > > > <Debi> wrote: > > > I think it's a complex issue. From what I get, and > > this is what I get, > > people with autism who say " accept, don't change " > > have met > > parents/people who obsess over every insignificant > > aspect of autism, > > like freaking out when their kid flaps from > > excitement or makes a > > guttural sound when she's enjoying a tv program. > On > > the flip side, > > some people with autism don't get that autism is > not > > just a state of > > being, it's *also* a set of clinical symptoms, > such > > as diarrhea, > > seizures, inability to speak, motor delays, > > cognitive processing. > > > > The fact is, there's good & bad in every > condition. > > My friend with > > breast cancer learned to trust in God, have > > patience, endurance, etc. > > Is breast cancer who she is? Difficult to say, > it's > > a part of her. She > > now processes information from the result of a new > > way of thinking > > after her condition. Doe she wish she had never > had > > breast cancer? Yes > > and no. She has come to appreciate the experience > > and positive > > changes, while wishing she looked different naked. > > > > If metals/virus/bacteria/what ever alters the way > > one would have > > existed, does it change who the person was? Yes. > Is > > that person still > > the same? Yes and no. > > > > The other issue that we all need to understand, > imo, > > is that none of > > us can look at it from the back end. In other > words, > > if when getting > > my daughter's diagnosis at 23 mos I could have had > a > > report saying if > > I do/don't do the following she will be a happy, > > independent, > > well-adjusted adult, then we could all kick back, > > pop a top and call > > it a day. But that's not the case. When my > daughter > > was diagnosed, I > > didn't know if she would ever be potty trained. Is > > that the end of the > > world? Well, no, but it sure is a bad thing. Not > > because someone who > > isn't potty trained is bad, but because it makes > > life more difficult > > for the person & everyone around them. Reasons? > Odor > > and health. I sat > > in front of an adult female with autism at an > event > > and she stunk to > > high heaven from defecating in her diaper. It > wasn't > > about ME it is > > about health. Having crap running down one's legs, > > chronic bladder > > infection, etc, is not a good thing. And it is > very > > isolating for > > people around her, because I wouldn't want to be > > around someone with > > fecal odor any more than someone with autism & > > extreme food aversions > > would want to be forced to eat broccoli. > > > > If I could know at age 8 that if I do/don't do > x-y-z > > Allie will learn > > enough math to be a functioning, independent, > happy > > adult, then I > > could kick back & follow the report. But I don't > > have that, so I'm > > left doing what I can, doing nothing, and she > > will/will not learn > > functional math skills. > > > > It's parents' jobs to do this for ANY of our kids. > > We don't know the > > future. So we must do what we can to *help* our > > kids. Yes, there is a > > message people with autism who don't believe in > > treating autism need > > us to hear, IMO, and that is through helping show > > respect and dignity > > to our kids. Listen to them. As they age, allow > them > > to have more > > control over their own issues, just like we would > > with typical kids. > > Show respect for who they are. Like with Allie, > she > > gets IV chelation. > > The ND crowd have told me I'm torturing her, > abusing > > her, etc. Yet she > > ASKS for the IV every 8 days after the last one. > She > > was crying for it > > last week. I told her going in if she would give > it > > 3 months then we'd > > stop if she didn't wanna do it any more. That's > > where I showed her > > some respect for her body and her wishes, while > > helping her. She is > > dumping metals like mad, and even better, has > > finally started growing > > and getting healthy. But according to ND people, > > there's no way my > > daughter would ever ask for such a thing or want > it, > > I simply must be > > torturing her and that I'm imagining her foot > > growing for the first > > time in 5 yrs. What ever. > > > > I cannot respect my child by *not* helping heal > her > > body. And, often, > > the autism decreases when the symptoms of autism > are > > addressed. That's > > not my fault, that's who she is when she's > healthy. > > > > Debi > > > > > > > > > > > > I am new hear so excuse me being a bit naive on > > this > > > issue. > > > > > > Why does it seam like the women that have autism > > are > > > very sensitive to any words that imply like we > > parents > > > want to " change " our daughters? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ > Be a better pen pal. > Text or chat with friends inside Yahoo! Mail. See > how. http://overview.mail.yahoo.com/ > === message truncated === Rebekah Phil 4:8 & #10084; ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Be a better pen pal. Text or chat with friends inside Yahoo! Mail. See how. http://overview.mail.yahoo.com/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 3, 2007 Report Share Posted December 3, 2007 Thank you, I liked how you put it. Rebekah --- Kassi wrote: > It isn't fair to lump neurodiversity advocates > according to what Lenny Schafer and Best say, > Debi. Not fair at all. > > You know damn well Im pro neurodiversity, which > means > ALL diversity, and I am PRO HEALTH. > > Autism got lumped in with the scary diarreah and > stuff > as a way to make Lenny and co able to seperate > people > they didnt feel bad about not listening to us, > without > knowing a blessed thing about us. > > You know me better than that, Debi. And I had > probably > the first " Celebrate Neurodiversity " shirt, in 2000. > > Kassiane > pro progress anti cure > > > <Debi> wrote: > > > I think it's a complex issue. From what I get, and > > this is what I get, > > people with autism who say " accept, don't change " > > have met > > parents/people who obsess over every insignificant > > aspect of autism, > > like freaking out when their kid flaps from > > excitement or makes a > > guttural sound when she's enjoying a tv program. > On > > the flip side, > > some people with autism don't get that autism is > not > > just a state of > > being, it's *also* a set of clinical symptoms, > such > > as diarrhea, > > seizures, inability to speak, motor delays, > > cognitive processing. > > > > The fact is, there's good & bad in every > condition. > > My friend with > > breast cancer learned to trust in God, have > > patience, endurance, etc. > > Is breast cancer who she is? Difficult to say, > it's > > a part of her. She > > now processes information from the result of a new > > way of thinking > > after her condition. Doe she wish she had never > had > > breast cancer? Yes > > and no. She has come to appreciate the experience > > and positive > > changes, while wishing she looked different naked. > > > > If metals/virus/bacteria/what ever alters the way > > one would have > > existed, does it change who the person was? Yes. > Is > > that person still > > the same? Yes and no. > > > > The other issue that we all need to understand, > imo, > > is that none of > > us can look at it from the back end. In other > words, > > if when getting > > my daughter's diagnosis at 23 mos I could have had > a > > report saying if > > I do/don't do the following she will be a happy, > > independent, > > well-adjusted adult, then we could all kick back, > > pop a top and call > > it a day. But that's not the case. When my > daughter > > was diagnosed, I > > didn't know if she would ever be potty trained. Is > > that the end of the > > world? Well, no, but it sure is a bad thing. Not > > because someone who > > isn't potty trained is bad, but because it makes > > life more difficult > > for the person & everyone around them. Reasons? > Odor > > and health. I sat > > in front of an adult female with autism at an > event > > and she stunk to > > high heaven from defecating in her diaper. It > wasn't > > about ME it is > > about health. Having crap running down one's legs, > > chronic bladder > > infection, etc, is not a good thing. And it is > very > > isolating for > > people around her, because I wouldn't want to be > > around someone with > > fecal odor any more than someone with autism & > > extreme food aversions > > would want to be forced to eat broccoli. > > > > If I could know at age 8 that if I do/don't do > x-y-z > > Allie will learn > > enough math to be a functioning, independent, > happy > > adult, then I > > could kick back & follow the report. But I don't > > have that, so I'm > > left doing what I can, doing nothing, and she > > will/will not learn > > functional math skills. > > > > It's parents' jobs to do this for ANY of our kids. > > We don't know the > > future. So we must do what we can to *help* our > > kids. Yes, there is a > > message people with autism who don't believe in > > treating autism need > > us to hear, IMO, and that is through helping show > > respect and dignity > > to our kids. Listen to them. As they age, allow > them > > to have more > > control over their own issues, just like we would > > with typical kids. > > Show respect for who they are. Like with Allie, > she > > gets IV chelation. > > The ND crowd have told me I'm torturing her, > abusing > > her, etc. Yet she > > ASKS for the IV every 8 days after the last one. > She > > was crying for it > > last week. I told her going in if she would give > it > > 3 months then we'd > > stop if she didn't wanna do it any more. That's > > where I showed her > > some respect for her body and her wishes, while > > helping her. She is > > dumping metals like mad, and even better, has > > finally started growing > > and getting healthy. But according to ND people, > > there's no way my > > daughter would ever ask for such a thing or want > it, > > I simply must be > > torturing her and that I'm imagining her foot > > growing for the first > > time in 5 yrs. What ever. > > > > I cannot respect my child by *not* helping heal > her > > body. And, often, > > the autism decreases when the symptoms of autism > are > > addressed. That's > > not my fault, that's who she is when she's > healthy. > > > > Debi > > > > > > > > > > > > I am new hear so excuse me being a bit naive on > > this > > > issue. > > > > > > Why does it seam like the women that have autism > > are > > > very sensitive to any words that imply like we > > parents > > > want to " change " our daughters? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ > Be a better pen pal. > Text or chat with friends inside Yahoo! Mail. See > how. http://overview.mail.yahoo.com/ > === message truncated === Rebekah Phil 4:8 & #10084; ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Be a better pen pal. Text or chat with friends inside Yahoo! Mail. See how. http://overview.mail.yahoo.com/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 3, 2007 Report Share Posted December 3, 2007 I'm sorry...That e-mail was directed to Debi. Sorry for any confusion. Rebekah --- Albrecht Rebekah wrote: > Thank you, I liked how you put it. > > Rebekah > --- Kassi wrote: > > > It isn't fair to lump neurodiversity advocates > > according to what Lenny Schafer and Best say, > > Debi. Not fair at all. > > > > You know damn well Im pro neurodiversity, which > > means > > ALL diversity, and I am PRO HEALTH. > > > > Autism got lumped in with the scary diarreah and > > stuff > > as a way to make Lenny and co able to seperate > > people > > they didnt feel bad about not listening to us, > > without > > knowing a blessed thing about us. > > > > You know me better than that, Debi. And I had > > probably > > the first " Celebrate Neurodiversity " shirt, in > 2000. > > > > Kassiane > > pro progress anti cure > > > > > > <Debi> wrote: > > > > > I think it's a complex issue. From what I get, > and > > > this is what I get, > > > people with autism who say " accept, don't > change " > > > have met > > > parents/people who obsess over every > insignificant > > > aspect of autism, > > > like freaking out when their kid flaps from > > > excitement or makes a > > > guttural sound when she's enjoying a tv program. > > On > > > the flip side, > > > some people with autism don't get that autism is > > not > > > just a state of > > > being, it's *also* a set of clinical symptoms, > > such > > > as diarrhea, > > > seizures, inability to speak, motor delays, > > > cognitive processing. > > > > > > The fact is, there's good & bad in every > > condition. > > > My friend with > > > breast cancer learned to trust in God, have > > > patience, endurance, etc. > > > Is breast cancer who she is? Difficult to say, > > it's > > > a part of her. She > > > now processes information from the result of a > new > > > way of thinking > > > after her condition. Doe she wish she had never > > had > > > breast cancer? Yes > > > and no. She has come to appreciate the > experience > > > and positive > > > changes, while wishing she looked different > naked. > > > > > > If metals/virus/bacteria/what ever alters the > way > > > one would have > > > existed, does it change who the person was? Yes. > > Is > > > that person still > > > the same? Yes and no. > > > > > > The other issue that we all need to understand, > > imo, > > > is that none of > > > us can look at it from the back end. In other > > words, > > > if when getting > > > my daughter's diagnosis at 23 mos I could have > had > > a > > > report saying if > > > I do/don't do the following she will be a happy, > > > independent, > > > well-adjusted adult, then we could all kick > back, > > > pop a top and call > > > it a day. But that's not the case. When my > > daughter > > > was diagnosed, I > > > didn't know if she would ever be potty trained. > Is > > > that the end of the > > > world? Well, no, but it sure is a bad thing. Not > > > because someone who > > > isn't potty trained is bad, but because it makes > > > life more difficult > > > for the person & everyone around them. Reasons? > > Odor > > > and health. I sat > > > in front of an adult female with autism at an > > event > > > and she stunk to > > > high heaven from defecating in her diaper. It > > wasn't > > > about ME it is > > > about health. Having crap running down one's > legs, > > > chronic bladder > > > infection, etc, is not a good thing. And it is > > very > > > isolating for > > > people around her, because I wouldn't want to be > > > around someone with > > > fecal odor any more than someone with autism & > > > extreme food aversions > > > would want to be forced to eat broccoli. > > > > > > If I could know at age 8 that if I do/don't do > > x-y-z > > > Allie will learn > > > enough math to be a functioning, independent, > > happy > > > adult, then I > > > could kick back & follow the report. But I don't > > > have that, so I'm > > > left doing what I can, doing nothing, and she > > > will/will not learn > > > functional math skills. > > > > > > It's parents' jobs to do this for ANY of our > kids. > > > We don't know the > > > future. So we must do what we can to *help* our > > > kids. Yes, there is a > > > message people with autism who don't believe in > > > treating autism need > > > us to hear, IMO, and that is through helping > show > > > respect and dignity > > > to our kids. Listen to them. As they age, allow > > them > > > to have more > > > control over their own issues, just like we > would > > > with typical kids. > > > Show respect for who they are. Like with Allie, > > she > > > gets IV chelation. > > > The ND crowd have told me I'm torturing her, > > abusing > > > her, etc. Yet she > > > ASKS for the IV every 8 days after the last one. > > She > > > was crying for it > > > last week. I told her going in if she would give > > it > > > 3 months then we'd > > > stop if she didn't wanna do it any more. That's > > > where I showed her > > > some respect for her body and her wishes, while > > > helping her. She is > > > dumping metals like mad, and even better, has > > > finally started growing > > > and getting healthy. But according to ND people, > > > there's no way my > > > daughter would ever ask for such a thing or want > > it, > > > I simply must be > > > torturing her and that I'm imagining her foot > > > growing for the first > > > time in 5 yrs. What ever. > > > > > > I cannot respect my child by *not* helping heal > > her > > > body. And, often, > > > the autism decreases when the symptoms of autism > > are > > > addressed. That's > > > not my fault, that's who she is when she's > > healthy. > > > > > > Debi > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I am new hear so excuse me being a bit naive > on > === message truncated === Rebekah Phil 4:8 & #10084; ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Be a better pen pal. Text or chat with friends inside Yahoo! Mail. See how. http://overview.mail.yahoo.com/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 3, 2007 Report Share Posted December 3, 2007 I'm sorry...That e-mail was directed to Debi. Sorry for any confusion. Rebekah --- Albrecht Rebekah wrote: > Thank you, I liked how you put it. > > Rebekah > --- Kassi wrote: > > > It isn't fair to lump neurodiversity advocates > > according to what Lenny Schafer and Best say, > > Debi. Not fair at all. > > > > You know damn well Im pro neurodiversity, which > > means > > ALL diversity, and I am PRO HEALTH. > > > > Autism got lumped in with the scary diarreah and > > stuff > > as a way to make Lenny and co able to seperate > > people > > they didnt feel bad about not listening to us, > > without > > knowing a blessed thing about us. > > > > You know me better than that, Debi. And I had > > probably > > the first " Celebrate Neurodiversity " shirt, in > 2000. > > > > Kassiane > > pro progress anti cure > > > > > > <Debi> wrote: > > > > > I think it's a complex issue. From what I get, > and > > > this is what I get, > > > people with autism who say " accept, don't > change " > > > have met > > > parents/people who obsess over every > insignificant > > > aspect of autism, > > > like freaking out when their kid flaps from > > > excitement or makes a > > > guttural sound when she's enjoying a tv program. > > On > > > the flip side, > > > some people with autism don't get that autism is > > not > > > just a state of > > > being, it's *also* a set of clinical symptoms, > > such > > > as diarrhea, > > > seizures, inability to speak, motor delays, > > > cognitive processing. > > > > > > The fact is, there's good & bad in every > > condition. > > > My friend with > > > breast cancer learned to trust in God, have > > > patience, endurance, etc. > > > Is breast cancer who she is? Difficult to say, > > it's > > > a part of her. She > > > now processes information from the result of a > new > > > way of thinking > > > after her condition. Doe she wish she had never > > had > > > breast cancer? Yes > > > and no. She has come to appreciate the > experience > > > and positive > > > changes, while wishing she looked different > naked. > > > > > > If metals/virus/bacteria/what ever alters the > way > > > one would have > > > existed, does it change who the person was? Yes. > > Is > > > that person still > > > the same? Yes and no. > > > > > > The other issue that we all need to understand, > > imo, > > > is that none of > > > us can look at it from the back end. In other > > words, > > > if when getting > > > my daughter's diagnosis at 23 mos I could have > had > > a > > > report saying if > > > I do/don't do the following she will be a happy, > > > independent, > > > well-adjusted adult, then we could all kick > back, > > > pop a top and call > > > it a day. But that's not the case. When my > > daughter > > > was diagnosed, I > > > didn't know if she would ever be potty trained. > Is > > > that the end of the > > > world? Well, no, but it sure is a bad thing. Not > > > because someone who > > > isn't potty trained is bad, but because it makes > > > life more difficult > > > for the person & everyone around them. Reasons? > > Odor > > > and health. I sat > > > in front of an adult female with autism at an > > event > > > and she stunk to > > > high heaven from defecating in her diaper. It > > wasn't > > > about ME it is > > > about health. Having crap running down one's > legs, > > > chronic bladder > > > infection, etc, is not a good thing. And it is > > very > > > isolating for > > > people around her, because I wouldn't want to be > > > around someone with > > > fecal odor any more than someone with autism & > > > extreme food aversions > > > would want to be forced to eat broccoli. > > > > > > If I could know at age 8 that if I do/don't do > > x-y-z > > > Allie will learn > > > enough math to be a functioning, independent, > > happy > > > adult, then I > > > could kick back & follow the report. But I don't > > > have that, so I'm > > > left doing what I can, doing nothing, and she > > > will/will not learn > > > functional math skills. > > > > > > It's parents' jobs to do this for ANY of our > kids. > > > We don't know the > > > future. So we must do what we can to *help* our > > > kids. Yes, there is a > > > message people with autism who don't believe in > > > treating autism need > > > us to hear, IMO, and that is through helping > show > > > respect and dignity > > > to our kids. Listen to them. As they age, allow > > them > > > to have more > > > control over their own issues, just like we > would > > > with typical kids. > > > Show respect for who they are. Like with Allie, > > she > > > gets IV chelation. > > > The ND crowd have told me I'm torturing her, > > abusing > > > her, etc. Yet she > > > ASKS for the IV every 8 days after the last one. > > She > > > was crying for it > > > last week. I told her going in if she would give > > it > > > 3 months then we'd > > > stop if she didn't wanna do it any more. That's > > > where I showed her > > > some respect for her body and her wishes, while > > > helping her. She is > > > dumping metals like mad, and even better, has > > > finally started growing > > > and getting healthy. But according to ND people, > > > there's no way my > > > daughter would ever ask for such a thing or want > > it, > > > I simply must be > > > torturing her and that I'm imagining her foot > > > growing for the first > > > time in 5 yrs. What ever. > > > > > > I cannot respect my child by *not* helping heal > > her > > > body. And, often, > > > the autism decreases when the symptoms of autism > > are > > > addressed. That's > > > not my fault, that's who she is when she's > > healthy. > > > > > > Debi > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I am new hear so excuse me being a bit naive > on > === message truncated === Rebekah Phil 4:8 & #10084; ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Be a better pen pal. Text or chat with friends inside Yahoo! Mail. See how. http://overview.mail.yahoo.com/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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