New to group

November 19, 2002

Chloe,

I live in San and could help you if you were looking for

therapists here. However, I would suggest calling Kelli Wood, their

clinic and the Capital School. When I visited the Capital School,

the therapists there mentioned to me that they do in-home programs

too and had some hours available. Kelli or other might be willing to

train some therapists too. You have the UT Austin speech program to

draw from too. I would give them a call. If you need phone numbers

let me know. They are others on this list that can chime in with

these and similar numbers too.

Good Luck, Theresa Madore

> Chloe:

> Welcome to Texas!!!!!!!!! I am sure our friends from Austin

will chime

> in with local info in a bit. Here is a great web resource that

should help

> as well. http://www.angelfire.com/tx5/autism/homeprogram.html

> Again, glad to have you in our extended family.

> Peacefully,

> Jeff Sell

----------------------

From: Chloe Foxworth [mailto:autismommie@y...]

New to group

> Hello all,

> I am new to this group and just wanted to introduce myself. My

name is Chloe and I have a little boy, , who is five. he is

still non-verbal, but sure tries real hard to still make himself be

heard! We live in North Austin and are doing an in home ABA program

with him. I hope to get and give support to other parents with

children on the spectrum. And hopefully make some new friends as

well! We just moved here from San Francisco ,CA and moved our son's

ABA therapists here with us!! They will unfortunately have

> to go back in December.

March 16, 2003

Welcome to the group and thank you for the great article. I have already printed it out. It described my oldest son, youngest son and my 20mth old daughter.

MISSYSAHM of MANY

Excuse Me While I Go Raise Tomorrow's Future.

New to group

Hi all, I am new to the group. My wife (Lise) & I (Dave)have a 9 yo boy with aspergers, "diagnosed" at age 4. We've been through alot including a psyc hospital stay for 3 weeks last year. We are currently looking to adopt a younger sister for him. Any feedback would be appreciated. I am attaching a great article (you've probally seen before) for family & friends at gatherings:"Dear Friends and Family" was written for the purpose of it being sent to relatives and hosts of holiday gatherings that might need a crash course in what to expect from their guest with autism. Article reprinted by permission of editor/author, Viki Gayhardt.] I understand that we will be visiting each other for the holidays this year! Sometimes these visits can be very hard for me, but here is some information that might help our visit to be more successful. As you probably know, I am challenged by a hidden disability called autism or what some people refer to as a pervasive developmental disorder (PDD). Autism/PDD is a neurodevelopmental disorder, which makes it hard for me to understand the environment around me. I have barriers in my brain that you can't see but which make it difficult for me to adapt to my surroundings. Sometimes I may seem rude and abrupt, but it is only because I have to try so hard to understand people and at the same time, make myself understood. People with autism have different abilities: some may not speak, some write beautiful poetry, others are whizzes in math (Albert Einstein was thought to be autistic), or have difficulty making friends. We are all different and need various degrees of support. Sometimes when I am touched unexpectedly, it might feel painful and make me want to run away. I get easily frustrated, too. Being with lots of other people is like standing next to a moving freight train and trying to decide how and when to jump aboard. I feel frightened and confused a lot of the time, like you would if you landed on an alien planet and didn't understand how the inhabitants communicated. This is why I need to have things the same as much as possible. Once I learn how things happen, I can get by ok. But if something, anything changes, then I have to relearn the situation all over again! It is very hard. When you try to talk to me, I often can't understand what you say because there is a lot of distraction around. I have to concentrate very hard to hear and understand one thing at a time. You might think I am ignoring you--I am not. Rather, I am hearing everything and not knowing what is most important to respond to. Holidays are exceptionally hard because there are so many different people, places and things going on that are out of my ordinary realm. This may be fun and adventurous for most people, but for me, it's very hard work and can be extremely stressful. I often have to get away from all the commotion to calm down. It would be great if you had a private place set up to where I could retreat. If I cannot sit at the meal table, do not think I am misbehaved or that my parents have no control over me. Sitting in one place for even 5 minutes is often impossible for me. I feel so antsy and overwhelmed by all the smells, sounds, and people--I just have to get up and move about. Please don't hold up your meal for me--go on without me and my parent's will handle the situation the best way they know. Eating in general is hard for me. If you understand that autism is a sensory processing disorder, it's no wonder eating is a problem! Think of all the senses involved with eating: sight, smell, taste, touch AND all the complicated mechanics that are involved with chewing and swallowing that a lot of people with autism have trouble with. I am not being picky--I literally cannot eat certain foods, as my sensory system and/or oral motor coordination are impaired. Don't be disappointed if mommy hasn't dressed me in starch and bows. It's because she knows how much stiff and frilly clothes can drive me buggy! I have to feel comfortable in my clothes or I will just be miserable! Temple Grandin, a very smart adult with autism, has taught people that when she had to wear stiff petticoats as a child, she felt like her skin was being rubbed with sandpaper. I often feel the same way in dressy clothes. When I go to someone else's house, I may appear bossy and controlling. In a sense, I am being controlling because that is how I try to fit into the world around me (which is so hard to figure out!) Things have to be done in a way I am familiar with or else I might get confused and frustrated. It doesn't mean you have to change the way you are doing things--just please be patient with me and understanding of how I have to cope...mom and dad have no control over how my autism makes me feel inside. People with autism often have little things that they do to help themselves feel more comfortable. The grown ups call it "Self regulation," or "stimming'. I might rock, hum, flick my fingers in my face, flap my arms or any number of different things. I am not trying to be disruptive or weird. Again, I am doing what I have to do for my brain to adapt to your world. Sometimes I cannot stop myself from talking, singing, or partaking in an activity. The grown ups call this "perseverating" which is kind of like self-regulation or stimming. I do this only because I have found something to occupy myself that makes me feel comfortable, and I don't want to come out of that comfortable place and join your hard-to-figure-out-world. Perseverative behaviors are good to a certain degree because they help me calm down. Please be respectful to my mom and dad if they let me "stim" for a while, as they know me best and what helps to calm me. Remember that my mom and dad have to watch me much more closely than the average child. This is for my own safety, preservation of your possessions, and to facilitate my integration with you tippies (what we autistics fondly call you neurotypical folk!) It hurts my parents' feelings to be criticized for being over protective or condemned for not watching me close enough. They are human and have been given an assignment intended for saints. My parents are good people and need your support. Holidays are filled with sights, Sounds, and smells. The average household is turned into a busy, frantic, festive place. Remember that this may be fun for you tippies but it's very hard work for me to conform. If I fall apart or act out in a way that you consider socially inappropriate, please remember that I don't possess the neurological system that is required to follow tippy rules. I am a unique person--an interesting person. I will find my place at this celebration that is comfortable for us all as long as you'll try to view the world through my eyes!

July 19, 2003

Hi Mark,

Welcome to our group, I am new to the group also, but I have learned

already that if you post a question or 2, we all will reply as best

we can. I have 1 child also who has ASPERGERS / ADHD (7).

In this reply I have a question that came to mind as I was typing.

Is Aspergers and CAPD related, I have one of each. My daughter has

CAPD, she is 18 and does fantastic.

Thanx,

candymania

July 19, 2003

Hi Candy and all. My biggest concern at the moment is my daughter

. She is 9 years old and a very capable and inteligent little

girl. Her school work is always very good and academically she is

doing very well. The problem is that just can not socialise

at all. She is forever breaking friends with her peers in the street

and also with friends at school. It is typical of aspergers that her

social skills are this way but I just don't know how to help her.

I've encouraged friends from school to come and stay for tea or

overnight stays but it always ends up the same. " She doesn't want to

be my friend anymore " is the normal outcome of a very petty

disagreement, Floods of tears will follow and then she will isolate

herself from everyone. Talking to about it, she seems to make

up reasons why ALL the other children have been nasty to her when

obviously they have not. She takes any comment very personally.

As a parent it is very painful to see my child not enjoying her

childhood with the companionship of friends. She is a very likeable,

bubbly caring girl and I would love for her to be able to just

play!!

If any of you have had the same kind of situation I would appreciate

any suggestions as to how to help her.

Many thanks, Mark.

> Hi Mark,

>

> Welcome to our group, I am new to the group also, but I have

learned

> already that if you post a question or 2, we all will reply as

best

> we can. I have 1 child also who has ASPERGERS / ADHD (7).

>

> In this reply I have a question that came to mind as I was typing.

> Is Aspergers and CAPD related, I have one of each. My daughter has

> CAPD, she is 18 and does fantastic.

>

> Thanx,

> candymania

July 19, 2003

Hi Mark!!!

Welcome to the group. We all have lots of info to share with you so start asking questions!!!!

If you havent already here are some good sites to look at:

http://www.udel.edu/bkirby/asperger/

http://www.asperger.org/index_asc.html

http://www.aspennj.org/

http://www.asperger.net/ <~ they have a really nice catalog with tons of books about Aspergers.

http://www.wrightslaw.com/links/free_pubs.htm <~~~ lost of free publications about autism and aspergers, plus education law

www.reedmartin.com Also about educational law and the rights of your child and you as the parent

http://www.autism-society.org/site/PageServer Autism societies website, which also includes each states office

http://www.autism.com/ari/ autism research institute

This site has good info about advocacy: You have to be a member, but its not that much to join.

http://www.copaa.net/

A good book to read is

Asperger's Syndrome, Tony Attwood (explians AS in detail and gives good examples)

The Explosive Child, Ross Greene (good book at discipline)

The Out of Sync Child, Carol Stock Kranowitz (this one is about the sensory issues)

Hope these places help you out, and if you have any specific questions just ask

Again, welcome to the group.

TK

Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please. Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)

New to groupMy name is Mark and I have 2 wonderful children who have been diagnosed with having Aspergers. My daughter is 9 and my son is 5. My wife and I are finding it more and more difficult trying to help them as we are getting absolutely zero help or support. It is so frustrating not knowing if the things you do to help your kids are right or not. I have so many questions that need answering and would appreciate any ideas from parents of children of a similar age.

July 19, 2003

what is capd??

Toodles!>^..^<Maralee

Re: New to group

Hi Mark,Welcome to our group, I am new to the group also, but I have learned already that if you post a question or 2, we all will reply as best we can. I have 1 child also who has ASPERGERS / ADHD (7).In this reply I have a question that came to mind as I was typing. Is Aspergers and CAPD related, I have one of each. My daughter has CAPD, she is 18 and does fantastic.Thanx,candymania

July 19, 2003

I nominate TK for president! Good job, TK! You're so helpful!

Toodles!>^..^<Maralee

New to groupMy name is Mark and I have 2 wonderful children who have been diagnosed with having Aspergers. My daughter is 9 and my son is 5. My wife and I are finding it more and more difficult trying to help them as we are getting absolutely zero help or support. It is so frustrating not knowing if the things you do to help your kids are right or not. I have so many questions that need answering and would appreciate any ideas from parents of children of a similar age.

July 19, 2003

>>In this reply I have a question that came to mind as I was typing.

Is Aspergers and CAPD related, I have one of each. My daughter has

CAPD, she is 18 and does fantastic.<<

There may be links between them. My son and husband both sometimes show

signs of CAPD, especially when they are stressed. There are times when they

just cannot process anything verbal at all.

Actually, it occurs to me that maybe this is why some of you are finding

your children cannot answer questions after a day at school, they have had

to work so hard at processing all day, their brains just sort of shut down

when they get home.

Also, don't forget that you have to leave what seems like an uncomfortably

large gap for them to process the words when you have asked a question. It

takes people with autism longer to process and work out what is meant. If

you interrupt them, and especially if you rephrase the question, they have

to start over.

in England

July 19, 2003

Hi Mark,

>>As a parent it is very painful to see my child not enjoying her

childhood with the companionship of friends. <<

Are you sure that she *wants* friends? Don't impose your feelings on her;

just because you think it is sad and wrong that she doesn't have friends,

doesn't mean that is how she feels. Most of the AS people I know are

perfectly happy not socialising - in fact, to do so is very hard for them

and not a pleasure or relaxation at all.

in England

July 20, 2003

Welcome, Mark. It indeed *is* wonderful to have a supportive place to come....we've all been there, done that. My 14 year old daughter was diagnosed ADHD/ODD in 2nd grade, then aspergers/bipolar in sixth. She's starting 9th grade in a month in a special ed school, and doing fairly well now, because she's there, and because of the meds that help her. Please feel free to contribute, ask questions, comment....we're glad you're here. And we're glad everyone is here!

Toodles!>^..^<Maralee

New to group

Hello all. My name is Mark and I have 2 wonderful children who have been diagnosed with having Aspergers. My daughter is 9 and my son is 5. My wife and I are finding it more and more difficult trying to help them as we are getting absolutely zero help or support. It is so frustrating not knowing if the things you do to help your kids are right or not. I have so many questions that need answering and would appreciate any ideas from parents of children of a similar age.Many thanks for this group. Itrs good to see that we are not alone.Regards, Mark.

July 21, 2003

Hi Mark,

Welcome to the group. Ask all the questions you want we may or maynot have

all the answer but we will try our best to help. I have a five year old son

just recently dx with PDD-NOS and Aspergers. So I understand hte whole are

we doing the right thing or not.

Hope we can help!

in Ajax~

_________________________________________________________________

Protect your PC - get McAfee.com VirusScan Online

http://clinic.mcafee.com/clinic/ibuy/campaign.asp?cid=3963

July 21, 2003

Hi Mark,

I have this problem also. My son is forever telling me that he has no

friends at school and daycare and that they all hurt his feelings and don't

like him. What I started ot do was to put him in organized activites such

as gymnastics, swimming, dancing. This way he only saw these people once a

week and didn't have to figure how to get along on a day to day basis just

for an hour or two at a time.

Also try and find a playgroup with other autistic children in your area that

she might feel more comfortable in.

Hope this helps.

>

>Reply-To: autism-aspergers

>To: autism-aspergers

>Subject: Re: New to group

>Date: Sat, 19 Jul 2003 11:13:24 -0000

>

>Hi Candy and all. My biggest concern at the moment is my daughter

>. She is 9 years old and a very capable and inteligent little

>girl. Her school work is always very good and academically she is

>doing very well. The problem is that just can not socialise

>at all. She is forever breaking friends with her peers in the street

>and also with friends at school. It is typical of aspergers that her

>social skills are this way but I just don't know how to help her.

>I've encouraged friends from school to come and stay for tea or

>overnight stays but it always ends up the same. " She doesn't want to

>be my friend anymore " is the normal outcome of a very petty

>disagreement, Floods of tears will follow and then she will isolate

>herself from everyone. Talking to about it, she seems to make

>up reasons why ALL the other children have been nasty to her when

>obviously they have not. She takes any comment very personally.

>As a parent it is very painful to see my child not enjoying her

>childhood with the companionship of friends. She is a very likeable,

>bubbly caring girl and I would love for her to be able to just

>play!!

>If any of you have had the same kind of situation I would appreciate

>any suggestions as to how to help her.

>Many thanks, Mark.

> > Hi Mark,

> >

> > Welcome to our group, I am new to the group also, but I have

>learned

> > already that if you post a question or 2, we all will reply as

>best

> > we can. I have 1 child also who has ASPERGERS / ADHD (7).

> >

> > In this reply I have a question that came to mind as I was typing.

> > Is Aspergers and CAPD related, I have one of each. My daughter has

> > CAPD, she is 18 and does fantastic.

> >

> > Thanx,

> > candymania

>

_________________________________________________________________

MSN 8 with e-mail virus protection service: 2 months FREE*

http://join.msn.com/?page=features/virus

July 23, 2003

Welcome to the group! I am also a stay at home mom. I once was a

special education teacher (I taught the blind and multihandicapped),

but dealing my son AND working full time with special ed kids would

be too much. I am also alone, no friends, but then I joined a local

support group that has helped wonders. Do you know of any in your

area? Give it a try. Talking to people that are going through what

you are helps in so many ways. Remember we are here to help you in

any way and I hope you like our group. It is a fantastic group of

people and we try to help, give advice, and just listen.

(Anchovyeater)

> Hello everyone, I wanted to introduce myself. My name is jennifer.

I

> have two children diagnosed with autism. a seven year old son

named

> corey, who is severly mentally impaired and severe autism. my

> daughter, sydney is four and was just diagnosed in may with autism

> also. I have read some of the posts from others and i am sitting

here

> nodding my head at alot of what I have read from you guys. My son

was

> diagnosed as mentally impaired when he was three so I have been

> dealing with special needs issues for about 4 years now. My son

was

> diagnosed with mental impairment over christmas and I had a 3

month

> old daughter, I have been through every feeling twice and no one

> truelly understands what you go through unless they have went

through

> this also, so I am in the right place. i am a stay at home mom. i

> love crafts like crocheting and knitting, and also

crosstitching,but

> find because of being a stay at home mom. I have no outlet or

friends

> to talk to. I am hoping to meet and become friends with you all,

> because I know you can understand what I go through.

> jennifer

July 23, 2003

My name is too and I am also sort of new to the group. I used to be

an SLP but I too found it very hard to do that AND take care of my son with

autism with high needs. So I am a stay-at-home Mom and it makes things

easier. I unschool . We follow his interests. So far, from what

I've read from this group, it has been so useful and enjoyable and really a

great place to pick up tips and help me understand the things (10

yrs.) goes through.

I started going last Thursday to a Moms Night Out for Moms with children of

any diagnosis and it was a lot of fun to get out and talk face2face with

people who understand!!!

C in Michigan

Re: new to group

> Welcome to the group! I am also a stay at home mom. I once was a

> special education teacher (I taught the blind and multihandicapped),

> but dealing my son AND working full time with special ed kids would

> be too much. I am also alone, no friends, but then I joined a local

> support group that has helped wonders.

July 23, 2003

Hi !!!

Wow..you really have your hands full. How wonderful that you have taken so much of your time and dedicated it to your children, that is awsome. I totally understand the lack of an outlet or friends to talk to. Im so glad you decided to join and im looking forward to hearing more about your family and experiences.

TK

-----Original Message-----From: jenlee252002 Sent: Tuesday, July 22, 2003 5:23 PMTo: autism-aspergers Subject: new to groupHello everyone, I wanted to introduce myself. My name is jennifer. I have two children diagnosed with autism. a seven year old son named corey, who is severly mentally impaired and severe autism. my daughter, sydney is four and was just diagnosed in may with autism also. I have read some of the posts from others and i am sitting here nodding my head at alot of what I have read from you guys. My son was diagnosed as mentally impaired when he was three so I have been dealing with special needs issues for about 4 years now. My son was diagnosed with mental impairment over christmas and I had a 3 month old daughter, I have been through every feeling twice and no one truelly understands what you go through unless they have went through this also, so I am in the right place. i am a stay at home mom. i love crafts like crocheting and knitting, and also crosstitching,but find because of being a stay at home mom. I have no outlet or friends to talk to. I am hoping to meet and become friends with you all, because I know you can understand what I go through. jennifer

July 23, 2003

Welcome, , you sweetie. I have my hands full with one special kid; can't imagine two. Some on this list have even more than two special kids. You need our support and PRAYER! : )

Toodles!>^..^<Maralee

new to group

Hello everyone, I wanted to introduce myself. My name is jennifer. I have two children diagnosed with autism. a seven year old son named corey, who is severly mentally impaired and severe autism. my daughter, sydney is four and was just diagnosed in may with autism also. I have read some of the posts from others and i am sitting here nodding my head at alot of what I have read from you guys. My son was diagnosed as mentally impaired when he was three so I have been dealing with special needs issues for about 4 years now. My son was diagnosed with mental impairment over christmas and I had a 3 month old daughter, I have been through every feeling twice and no one truelly understands what you go through unless they have went through this also, so I am in the right place. i am a stay at home mom. i love crafts like crocheting and knitting, and also crosstitching,but find because of being a stay at home mom. I have no outlet or friends to talk to. I am hoping to meet and become friends with you all, because I know you can understand what I go through. jennifer

July 23, 2003

Hi, ! This is a good place, full of good people who know what's

up.

I'm Annie, in Albuquerque NM. My dh Ron & I have two kids: Kris, 34,

bi-polar but medically adjusted , living in Arizona and doing great!

And Louie, 23, HFA/AS, in supported living for 2 yrs. now, and advancing

by leaps and bounds.

Welcome in!

Annie, who loves ya annie@...

--

" If you put garbage in a computer, nothing comes out but garbage. But

this garbage, having passed through a very expensive machine, is somehow

ennobled and none dare criticise it. " -- anon

July 24, 2003

Hi ,

Welcome to the group. You will definitely find some new friends here who

understand your hurt, fustrationa nd hapiness with the smallest to the

biggest things with you and your children. If someone didn't refer me to

this group i don't know how I could have coped with my sons dx.

I too like crossstich and I am just learning how to knit. I also enjoy

scrapbooking, as do a number of othres on line. So welcome to the group the

more the merry.

in Ajax

>

>Reply-To: autism-aspergers

>To: autism-aspergers

>Subject: new to group

>Date: Tue, 22 Jul 2003 23:22:39 -0000

>

>Hello everyone, I wanted to introduce myself. My name is jennifer. I

>have two children diagnosed with autism. a seven year old son named

>corey, who is severly mentally impaired and severe autism. my

>daughter, sydney is four and was just diagnosed in may with autism

>also. I have read some of the posts from others and i am sitting here

>nodding my head at alot of what I have read from you guys. My son was

>diagnosed as mentally impaired when he was three so I have been

>dealing with special needs issues for about 4 years now. My son was

>diagnosed with mental impairment over christmas and I had a 3 month

>old daughter, I have been through every feeling twice and no one

>truelly understands what you go through unless they have went through

>this also, so I am in the right place. i am a stay at home mom. i

>love crafts like crocheting and knitting, and also crosstitching,but

>find because of being a stay at home mom. I have no outlet or friends

>to talk to. I am hoping to meet and become friends with you all,

>because I know you can understand what I go through.

>jennifer

>

_________________________________________________________________

Help STOP SPAM with the new MSN 8 and get 2 months FREE*

http://join.msn.com/?page=features/junkmail

September 19, 2004

Hi Sue,

I understand what you are going through. My 9 yr old

possibly has OCD only he has more obssesive thoughts and no

compulsive behavior ( that we have noticed). He was tormented by

some of his thoughts and he was put on prozac right away.

His regular Dr. gave us the prozac and while waiting to set up the

other counselors ( which seemed to take forever)a friend recommended

a accupuncture Doc. At that moment in my life I would have shaved my

head and ran through the streets if I thoght it would help my little

boy.

Some specialize in stress reduction and the needles don't hurt at

all....he also taught him breathing exercises as well as exercises

to get your mind on other things. I cannot begin to tell you how

this helped us. I also went because I felt paralyzed with fear and

it actually helped. We went 4 or 5 times in a row...and it got us

through a very rough patch. Waiting for the meds to work and seeing

the right docs takes so much time...It's been around 6 weeks....and

things seem better although he still has thoughts that bother him

but seems much much less tormented by them.

For me as a mom...I've looked into everything and literally picked

our family life apart...making sure our parenting was where it

should be....I also changed his diet and I found a book called " Is

your childs brain starving " by Dr Lyon. We have less candy and

pop...better foods...vitamins minerals ect....but I also know that

it could be plain old brain chemisty....but I had to try something...

I think the prozac is helping with any anxiety....but it seems to

wind him up for 3 hours after taking the meds and his listening

isn't as good.. He's on liquid 20mg once a day. While the anxiety is

down we can work on some of the issues that might just be the

trigger that caused everything...he had some recent losses in his

young life and all we can do is work though them and hope for the

best....I know and understand everything you feel...just know you

are not alone....and I'm sending supportive vibes your way.....

we will get through this!

Take Care,

Patty

Please let me know what you think of the zoloft....or has anyone

else had great results from a particular medication?

In , sbwesterfield@a... wrote:

> Hi, I just joined the list tonight as I just learned several weeks

ago that

> my 7 year old has OCD and today also figured out she has been

pulling her hair

> out as well for several months. The Dr. started her on Zoloft but

it is too

> early to tell any effect. I am overwhelmed and scared, and trying

to read

> everything I can. The books I have talk about CBT as the main

method of tx. but her

> new psychologist isn't as familiar with this. Any thoughts about

how to get

> thorough this are appreciated and I will try and read the archives

as well.

> Thanks. Sue

>

September 19, 2004