Re: Palin's choice puts her under 20%

August 29, 2008

I listened to her acceptance speech today and was impressed. But, I

think she referred to herself as a " hockey mom " not soccer mom.

(Something this hockey fan thought was refreshing.)

" Many people will

> express sympathy, but you don't want or need that, because Trig

will

> be a joy…Children are the most precious and promising ingredient in

> this mixed-up world…Trig is no different, except he has one extra

> chromosome. "

>

> And here's what others have to say about her

>

> =====

>

August 30, 2008

Hi Deb!

Hockey mom -that makes sense -after all she's in Alaska! I am

impressed by her too (and by Obama as well) -but I'm ashamed by the

news coverage of the reason she's keeping her baby and making it seem

like there is no other reason other than that's she's clearly pro

life. As if why else would anyone want a Down Syndrome baby -shame

on them!

Look how many would love to adopt a Down Syndrome baby

http://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2006/feb/12/20060212-112732-6787r/

Back before our kids were born Glenn and I talked about it and we

both decided that no matter what we would have our baby -but that was

our " choice " and it was not because I'm pro life because I happen to

be pro choice for others- pro life for me. Pro choice means you

allow others to make their own decision -and that means choosing

to 'not' abort too.

What about the many that give birth to special needs babies and stick

them in institutions for life?! Did anyone see that horrible

documentary last night on NBC?! (and not horrible for exposing it -

again-but horrible that anyone anywhere can let people live their

lives this way in a crib from infants to adults) The infants stop

growing when they are not being picked up and loved -and not being

moved most have bodies the size of young children as adults. They

are in cages (cribs) -for life. If they try to move around they are

tied to the crib -hands and feet. And without therapy their bodies

are in the one shape like a stiff pretzel unable to move. Did anyone

see this? It was a " pro life " nightmare and yes I know this is not

what prolife means! But what happens to babies that nobody wants in

some areas of the world will turn your stomach and make you ashamed

to be of the same species that lets this happen to humans...and the

human rights are not just missing in life -but in death too. The

infants, children, teens, adults, and seniors are just buried in the

dirt outside the institution like goldfish. Nobody wants them

either. There was a handful of women that pretend to be the mother's

of some of the children that come to visit once in a blue moon -and

that's the only light in these human's lives -ever.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21790870/

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26227040/

and here's another one

http://warehousesofneglect.civiblog.org/blog/_archives/2007/9/12/3224933.html

Why does everything have to be about division and politics -why can't

one choose to have a special needs baby? I had two children that

were special needs and yes it's hard at times but so is childbirth -

does that mean nobody should do it? And as hard as it is -just like

moms who say it about childbirth -most go back and would do it

again. I wouldn't trade my special needs boys for " normal " children

even if I could go back. I feel like we knew how to help them and

love them no matter what. There were a few years that Dakota who was

a traumatic delivery that caused severe head, face and neck injuries -

was at risk for sudden death from SIDS (he had breathing and eating

problems from his torn neck muscles) and permanent mental retardation

and a life in a wheel chair. There is no doubt without our work and

all the therapy and doctors...and LOVE -he would probably have died

because many times he stopped breathing but because I didn't leave

him alone for one second (and he was monitored even while sleeping)

we were able to save him. He for sure would not be the gifted,

funny, popular,coordinated, athletic, creative honor student teen he

is today. How dare anyone think their child is better just because

they are " normal " So was Hitler! And today Dakota's ADHD is not an

issue since fish oils. Tanner's special needs were nothing in

comparison to Dakotas. He only had apraxia, sensory issues and some

mild low tone we needed to help him overcome -the worst was how

clueless most professionals were...oh yeah -about his " dyspraxia "

Growing up my mom was friends with a family where one of the children

had Down Syndrome. The other sister was one of the prettiest girls

in the school and the whole family was super nice. But for the life

of me I can't remember how any of them looked except for the sister

with Down Syndrome. She was like an angel to me- always smiling and

accepting of everyone. The whole family was so close and everyone

loved each other so much. It was due to knowing her as a child that

when I got a bit older I " chose " to adopt a special needs kitten. I

wrote about here (from the archives) and below is the story.

And probably why God chose me to give me the gift of 2 special

needs children! Thank you God!!

" never stopped talking

When I was a teenager and still living home with my parents -I dated

this guy Bruce that owned a pet store. One day when I visited Bruce

in the shop I noticed a little Siamese kitten that was in a cage

without all the other Siamese kittens. The other Siamese kittens

were all much larger than this one little kitten who couldn't stand

up and just kept crying and crying -and trying to stand and kept

falling over and over -all alone.

I asked Bruce about this little Siamese kitten and he told me he was

sending the kitten " back " because there was something wrong with it,

so it couldn't be sold.

After a big fuss (Bruce strongly did not want to give me this

kitten) He finally agreed to let me adopt this little teeny tiny

Siamese kitten that I named " "

I brought right away to a vet that our family used for our

other pets in Westfield, NJ -and I recall they were shocked to see

such a kitten with such severe defects. I don't remember 's

diagnosis -it was a long name and I'd have to look it up -but she

had severe neurological problems which affected her balance, sight,

and movement and there was suspicion that the mother may have had

distemper. The vet told me that a kitten like is rare to

begin with -and even more so since the mother cats typically will

reject a baby that usually is found to have serious defects. They

even asked if they could study to track her progress.

was not expected to live a long life. could see -

but I was told she saw things in doubles and triples and wouldn't

know where things were in space.

at first couldn't eat because she couldn't sense where the

bowl was even if we held her body and put her face by the dish.

When she tried to eat she looked like a woodpecker with her head -

and as she got close to the bowl she would be so excited to reach

the food that she would squirm out of our hands and fall into the

dish- knocking her food or milk all over. She couldn't stand even

at first -so walking was for awhile out of the question -but she

never stopped trying -and we kept feeding so she kept

getting stronger (she only liked the really expensive cat gourmet

cat foods in little cans)

proved everyone wrong - she learned to eat on her own like a

woodpecker - walk on her own like a drunken sailor -and even run at

times -like a snake (the back of her body which was weak would sway

from side to side) Of course since couldn't see where walls

were in reality she lost some of her front teeth when she was

playing. couldn't jump -the back of her body was kind of

limp -so she instead learned how to climb up onto things with her

front legs. As strong as 's front legs were -she didn't use

them to scratch others.

Unlike most cats - would come to you when you called her -she

would answer the door bell with her friends (our dogs) Actually

acted more like a dog than a cat. When she was happy -which

seemed like always -she would purr really loud and lick your face

with her stinky rough tongue.

People who hated cats actually changed their mind when they met

-she could win over anyone.

wasn't my child -she was my pet. I didn't take her because

I felt sorry for her -or because I wanted to punish myself -or

because I thought I was so tolerant or special I could help her when

nobody else could. I took out of that pet store because I

saw a kitten that wanted and deserved a chance just like the others -

and that's what I gave her.

lived into her teens -and as most Siamese cats -she never

stopped " talking " to us up to the end. Having as a pet was

one of the blessings of my life. She taught me and many others much

more than what we taught her.

Ironically while never stopped " talking " , years later I

became a mom to two children who were " late talkers " The lessons

taught me helped me to help my boys to overcome, and to help

others like them through the CHERAB Foundation which I founded.

Who but God is to say what type of life is right and what type of

life is wrong? -as if there is such an answer! "

=====

August 30, 2008

Janice, I completely agree with you. I had the same thoughts after hearing

that Palin's baby has down syndrome. Once I realized that my daughter was

having delays, I stopped working. As an attorney, working with my husband in

our

own practice, I had a home office so I could still run around for my sons. But

even with a home office, I realized quickly that I had to be with my

daughter all the time. I completely understand and appreciate the fact that

many

parents cannot afford not to work, and for them, there isn't any choice.

When I was in my late twenties I was involved in politics, and served as the

first female municipal attorney in NJ. Clearly, the role of a governor and a

Vice-President is more time consuming than that of a municipal attorney. I do

NOT believe that Palin has her baby with her all the time. Meetings alone,

including public meetings can go on into the late night and early morning

hours.

So, MY personal opinion is that having a child who will undoubtedly face

disabilities and challenges and still serve as governor and participate in a

Presidential campaign, then possibly as Vice-President, is something I

personally would not do. I am not making a judgment against her, as you did not.

Everyone does things differently. I have always been a hands on mom in every

aspect. Palin clearly made her choice; it is just different than mine would

have been. Carolyn

**************It's only a deal if it's where you want to go. Find your travel

deal here.

(http://information.travel.aol.com/deals?ncid=aoltrv00050000000047)

August 30, 2008

Janice,

You took the words right out of my mouth. My friend says, " Well she'll have her

husband or other family members to take care of her child. " I just shake my

head because it's hard to stomach. To have an NT child and work is different

than having a child with Special Needs, that young.

I don't know how to say it correctly without coming off looking as if Moms

belong at home birthing, cooking and cleaning but when you have a Special Needs

child, your priorities Have to change.

From: Janice <jscott@...>

Subject: Re: [ ] Re: Palin's choice puts her under 20%

Date: Saturday, August 30, 2008, 6:54 PM

Hi,

I am not American and so have no affiliations but I do wonder about Sondra

Palin's decision to take on such a challenge with firstly.... such a young baby

to care for and secondly.... . a young baby who is clearly going to need all of

the help and extra assistance a family can muster.

The decision to have a child necessitates the decision to give that child every

opportunity to thrive and to prosper at your disposal.

Mat. leave is there for a purpose.... so that mother and baby can bond during

the first year of life. I believe that this is a very important time between

mother and child so I was flabergasted to learn that Sondra Palin was accepting

the call to service with a little tyke to care for and to nurture.

I just cannot help but feel sorry for the child in this case. I wonder if she

is a bit naive as to the 'true' needs of a special needs child or if perhaps,

she is such a dynamo that she has it covered. ly, I don't know how this

could be possible but perhaps it can....

I know that when I was working with Mark needing so much extra..... I always

felt torn between his needs getting fulfilled and our financial needs as a

family and my personal career which was at an all time high. It is a difficult

balance. When a child has special needs, all of the nurtering and early

intervention goes a long, long way to making the difference between severely

handicapped and high-functioning individual. I still feel guilty for working

through Mark's first 4 years of life. I still feel that had I stayed home, I

could have helped him so much more. In addition, it is very tough to stay

focused in a high level position when your child is not thriving as he could be.

I make no judgements on her character or her person since I have not followed

her career but it does seem like she is a wonderful and dynamic politician.

However, I cannot help but feel this twinge of sorrow for her child who needs

her so much and shall have to make do with nannies and such because of this

decision to serve. It is a difficult road that she has chosen.

I only hope that she does not look back at some later date and regret her

decision.

What do all of you think instinctively? Can you have a high powered career such

as being the VP of the US and still adequately provide the 'extra's' required

for a special needs child?

I only know that I finally gave up my career to stay home...... I just couldn't

do it and give my son the focus he needed to thrive and overcome his many

challenges. I know that some women do manage to balance this successfully but

my job was all consuming... ..

Janice

August 30, 2008

I agree with you Janice in that I spent every single minute with

Dakota for years and years to help him -and for Tanner too we had to

drive to see doctors and therapists etc. so don't know either how you

can do that and be VP either -nobody does because nobody ever did it

before. But guess as they say " where there is a will there will be a

way " ... it appears she plans on taking her baby with her everywhere

and forget about nanny - I'm sure the top therapists, doctors,

teachers and what ever other help needed will be at 'her' beck and

call 24/7 365 days of the year. Only a VP will have that power- if

only for the rest of us!

Also remember 80% of people wouldn't choose to have a baby with Down

Syndrome -so your opinion is well within the norm. I'm the strange

one here -I'm proud of her decision because I think it's gross

frankly that if people could know before hand that their child was

going to have any type of " defect " parents can just choose to abort

them. What about our kids with dyspraxia or autism? What about if

your child will need glasses or braces? What if your child's eyes

are going to be brown and only green will do because it matches your

car? Gross. To me -that's my opinion that we decide which life is

worth living.

And since we talked about teen and adult dyspraxics and autistics -

here's an " normal teen " story written by a teen with Down Syndrome

and you have to check out the amazing song she wrote (it's the You

Tube link)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~article written by a Down Syndrome teenager who has since passed

away far too young

(and PS -her dad is the CEO and and Noble)

I have Down Syndrome but I'm a normal teenager

By Riggio

When I first started to work on this story, I thought maybe I

shouldn't do it. I thought you might see that I have Down syndrome,

and that you wouldn't like me.

My mom thinks that's silly. " Have you ever met anyone who didn't like

you because you have Down syndrome? " she asks me. She's right, of

course. (She usually is!)

When people ask me what Down syndrome is, I tell them it's an extra

chromosome. A doctor would tell you the extra chromosome causes an

intellectual disability that makes it harder for me to learn things.

(For instance, some of my classes are in a " resource room, " where

kids with many kinds of learning disabilities are taught at a

different pace.)

When my mom first told me I had Down syndrome, I worried that people

might think I wasn't as smart as they were, or that I talked or

looked different.

I just want to be like everyone else, so sometimes I wish I could

give back the extra chromosome. But having Down syndrome is what

makes me " me. " And I'm proud of who I am. I'm a hard worker, a good

person, and I care about my friends.

A Lot Like You

Even though I have Down syndrome, my life is a lot like yours. I read

books and watch TV. I listen to music with my friends. I'm on the

swim team and in chorus at school. I think about the future, like who

I'll marry. And I get along with my sisters—except when they take my

CDs without asking!

Some of my classes are with typical kids, and some are with kids with

learning disabilities. I have an aide who goes with me to my harder

classes, like math and biology. She helps me take notes and gives me

tips on how I should study for tests. It really helps, but I also

challenge myself to do well. For instance, my goal was to be in a

typical English class by 12th grade. That's exactly what happened

this year!

But sometimes it's hard being with typical kids. For instance, I

don't drive, but a lot of kids in my school do. I don't know if I'll

ever be able to, and that's hard to accept.

Dream Job: Singer

I try not to let things like that upset me and just think of all the

good things in my life. Like that I've published two songs. One of my

favorite things to do is write poetry, And this singer my dad knows

recorded some of my poems as singles.

Right now someone else is singing my songs, but someday, I want to be

the one singing. I know it's going to happen, because I've seen it.

One day I looked in the mirror, and I saw someone in my head, a

famous person or someone who was somebody, and I just knew: I will be

a singer.

It's true that I don't learn some things as fast as other people. But

that won't stop me from trying. I just know that if I work really

hard and be myself, I can do almost anything.

See Me

But I still have to remind myself all the time that it really is OK

to just be myself. Sometimes all I see—all I think other people see—

is the outside of me, not the inside. And I really want people to go

in there and see what I'm all about.

Maybe that's why I write poetry—so people can find out who I really

am. My poems are all about my feelings: when I hope, when I hurt. I'm

not sure where the ideas come from—I just look them up in my head.

It's like I have this gut feeling that comes out of me and onto the

paper.

I can't change that I have Down syndrome, but one thing I would

change is how people think of me. I'd tell them: Judge me as a whole

person, not just the person you see. Treat me with respect, and

accept me for who I am. Most important, just be my friend.

After all, I would do the same for you.

Listen to " The Ring " , the song that wrote!

What is Down Syndrome?

Down syndrome is an intellectual disability that about 5,000 babies

in the United States are born with each year. A person with Down

syndrome has 47 chromosomes, microscopic structures that carry

genetic information to determine almost everything about a person.

Most people have only 46 chromosomes. It's the extra chromosome that

can cause certain physical characteristics (such as short stature and

an upward slant to the eyes) and speech and developmental delays.

Still, people with Down syndrome are a lot like you: They are unique

people with strengths and talents.

http://www.nationalgeographic.com/ngkids/0612/index.html

also posted here

http://ckihuc.blogspot.com/2008/05/melissa-riggio.html

Tragically won't be around anymore to share how beautiful it is to be

who she is.

~article

" She was a songwriter

She was a poet

She was a homecoming queen

She traveled the world with her family

She aspired to be a singer

She was a high school graduate

She was a sister

She was a daughter

She worked at the YMCA

She talked of going to college

She was changing the data

She was a dreamer

She was an inspiration

She had Down syndrome

She proved the stereotypes were wrong

She was twenty

She was battling leukemia

She lost.

She will be deeply missed.

Weeks after was born, and Noble stores across the country were

hosting storytimes to promote Down syndrome Awareness. I couldn't believe it.

Had I ever heard of an event to promote Down syndrome awareness before? Was such

an event ever promoted to the general public in such a popular place as

and Noble?

That is when I learned of Riggio and her father Steve, who just happens

to be CEO of, yes, and Noble. There they were in the headlines. It was

just the type of story I needed to hear....a story about a teenager with Down

syndrome who was living a full and happy life and of her parents who were doing

all they could to advocate for her and others like her. I felt less alone.

Just a couple of months ago, my nine year old niece proudly came to me with her

National Geographic Kids magazine in her hands and showed me an article about a

girl with Down syndrome. There was again. She was excited to tell me

about all the cool things kids with Down syndrome could do.

Now is gone. I didn't know she was battling leukemia. Given all of the

reading I do about Down syndrome online, I don't know how this fact escaped me.

When I went to our local Down syndrome website this afternoon to post a notice

about a Mommy and Me Music class, and saw the news about , I was caught

off guard. A sense of loss immediately hit me.

I worry so much about who will take care of when he is fifty, and we are

most probably gone. When I learned of 's death, one of the first things

that hit me was, " that could be " . Then again it could be any of us. Another

reminder not to take life for granted and to make the most of every day.

My deepest sympathies go out to 's family. "

http://momseatofpants.blogspot.com/2008/04/melissa-riggio.html

Her poem The Ring

THE RING

I'm in the Ring outside

I'm following my belief

I'm looking at the sky

I saw God following my heart

I'm an ordinary woman

The Ring is falling down my way

The wind is blowing me away

The Ring is falling down, down my way

The wind is blowing me away

And so I came back to

The center of the Ring

Am I just a broken angel?

God has sent me here to heal

To be an ordinary woman

Poem by Riggio

Set to music and recorded by Fuller

http://www.usatoday.com/life/books/news/2007-02-19-melissa-riggio_x.htm

=====

August 30, 2008

Hi,

I am not American and so have no affiliations but I do wonder about Sondra

Palin's decision to take on such a challenge with firstly.... such a young baby

to care for and secondly..... a young baby who is clearly going to need all of