Guest guest Posted March 30, 2003 Report Share Posted March 30, 2003 Just have to chime in here with those of you thinking about getting a job. DON'T!! Find something FUN!! OUT of the HOUSE!! Okay, if you want a job, get one that you leave at the job, that you don't do at home. I work from home. Sure, it's handy, it's convenient, etc. Just ask Penny though. I'm always bitching. I feel like if I'm home and on the computer (like now) I should be doing a bit of work. It's ALWAYS there. I can't just leave it at the office and forget about when I get home. I feel guilty sending him to school with a runny nose so I can TRY to catch up. I understand about needing to do something for you. Believe me I do. Something that makes you feel valued. I have no idea what to suggest, but UGH, working at home isn't it, at least not for me. Just my .02. ellen Re: Stupid Spouse Phrases I give the men credit for trying to be supportive. But what I think the guys don't get, is that in order for the us - - as primary caretakers and family architects - - to reinvent ourselves, we must also reinvent the family. Men just don't seem to grasp that a woman is usually the center of gravity in any family - - anything that changes in her life affects every aspect of the family function and dynamic. As such it is a much bigger undertaking for a woman to redefine herself - - it's not just as simple as finding a job - - it is creating a new vision for the family as a whole. This is all very abstract ... I hope I'm still making sense ... So keeping all this in mind, I would in no way feel like I was whining or making excuses because I was uncertain or overwhelmed about figuring these things out. (SAHM in GA) MSN elizabethloht@... n 32, mo, no formal dx Phoebe, 6 wks ----- Original Message ----- > Now I know neither one of us is being whiney or trying to justify why we > CAN'T do something. > This complaint is REAL! > > Could I go to school? Maybe. But when? During the day? and how? > Money is always an issue, but still, even if it weren't, the specifics of > schedule planning would be horrendous. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 30, 2003 Report Share Posted March 30, 2003 >>>>>>>>>>>>>>> > Doug Flutie is the football player whose son is > autistic. His commercial just came on my TV. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Yeah, only now they claim he's cured. Tuna ===== mom to: , 8, ASD , 4, NT Normal is just a setting on the washing machine. - Whoopi Goldberg ______________________________________________________________________ Post your free ad now! http://personals.yahoo.ca Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 30, 2003 Report Share Posted March 30, 2003 >>>>>>>>>>>>>>> > Doug Flutie is the football player whose son is > autistic. His commercial just came on my TV. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Yeah, only now they claim he's cured. Tuna ===== mom to: , 8, ASD , 4, NT Normal is just a setting on the washing machine. - Whoopi Goldberg ______________________________________________________________________ Post your free ad now! http://personals.yahoo.ca Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 30, 2003 Report Share Posted March 30, 2003 >>>>>>>>>>>>>>> > Doug Flutie is the football player whose son is > autistic. His commercial just came on my TV. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Yeah, only now they claim he's cured. Tuna ===== mom to: , 8, ASD , 4, NT Normal is just a setting on the washing machine. - Whoopi Goldberg ______________________________________________________________________ Post your free ad now! http://personals.yahoo.ca Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 30, 2003 Report Share Posted March 30, 2003 I don't think it's his son they claim is cured, I think it was Dan Marino's son, but I could be wrong. ellen Re: Re: Stupid Spouse Phrases >>>>>>>>>>>>>>> > Doug Flutie is the football player whose son is > autistic. His commercial just came on my TV. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Yeah, only now they claim he's cured. Tuna ===== mom to: , 8, ASD , 4, NT Normal is just a setting on the washing machine. - Whoopi Goldberg ______________________________________________________________________ Post your free ad now! http://personals.yahoo.ca Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 30, 2003 Report Share Posted March 30, 2003 > Doug Flutie is the football player whose son is autistic. His commercial just came on my TV. > Thanks...my brain suddenly crashed on me; I kept thinking, " Dan Marino? Nah... Don ? I think he's an actor... " LOL...I knew you guys would know who I meant! This is from the Flutie site: WebED, Inc. teams up with the Doug Flutie, Jr. Foundation for Autism, offers free courses to parents of children with autism. The Doug Flutie, Jr. Foundation for Autism is affiliated with WebED, Inc., one of the nation's leading Internet-based education companies. Both organizations work together to provide a comprehensive series of online autism courses for parents and teachers. WebED will provide professional development credits to educators that take the fee-based autism courses. These courses have been developed by the finest academics and practicing professionals in the field of autism. Topics covered in the courses include, but are not limited to, behavioral intervention, applied behavior analysis, sensory integration, Internet resources for autism, language development and social stories. For each course fee received, WebED will make a donation to the Doug Flutie, Jr. Foundation for Autism, Inc. In addition, the Company is offering these courses free to parents of children with autism or related developmental disabilities. If you are the parent of a child with autism, and would like to take part in this unique opportunity, please register at: www.WebED.com/parents Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 30, 2003 Report Share Posted March 30, 2003 > Doug Flutie is the football player whose son is autistic. His commercial just came on my TV. > Thanks...my brain suddenly crashed on me; I kept thinking, " Dan Marino? Nah... Don ? I think he's an actor... " LOL...I knew you guys would know who I meant! This is from the Flutie site: WebED, Inc. teams up with the Doug Flutie, Jr. Foundation for Autism, offers free courses to parents of children with autism. The Doug Flutie, Jr. Foundation for Autism is affiliated with WebED, Inc., one of the nation's leading Internet-based education companies. Both organizations work together to provide a comprehensive series of online autism courses for parents and teachers. WebED will provide professional development credits to educators that take the fee-based autism courses. These courses have been developed by the finest academics and practicing professionals in the field of autism. Topics covered in the courses include, but are not limited to, behavioral intervention, applied behavior analysis, sensory integration, Internet resources for autism, language development and social stories. For each course fee received, WebED will make a donation to the Doug Flutie, Jr. Foundation for Autism, Inc. In addition, the Company is offering these courses free to parents of children with autism or related developmental disabilities. If you are the parent of a child with autism, and would like to take part in this unique opportunity, please register at: www.WebED.com/parents Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 30, 2003 Report Share Posted March 30, 2003 > I don't think it's his son they claim is cured, I think it was Dan Marino's son, but I could be wrong. ellen < yeah, you're right. doug flutie's son is very much NOT cured ~~~ Imagine all the people, living life in peace - Lennon ~~~ ------------------------- gina, 31, ny single mom to - kailey, 8, autism, hyperlexia, depression, anxiety, OCD, DSI trevor, 3, multiple developmental delays, no " official " dx yet parker jade, due 7-25-03 :-D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 30, 2003 Report Share Posted March 30, 2003 > Actually, as I was writing that, the idea of a cellphone popped into mind, Debbie! LOL. It had honestly not occured to me before. I'm pretty anti-cellphone, so it never would have entered my mind. But this IS a good idea. < i used to be anti cellphone too, but when kailey started preschool and i was going to college, i knew i needed something for emergencies. i got a pager, because i couldn't afford a cellphone (remember, this was 6 years ago). it was helpful, but not helpful enough. a few years later, i got a tracfone, which is like a prepaid cellphone. that worked well, until it went for a swim in the toilet. then my mom got me a cellphone under her credit and i have it with me ALWAYS. i really don't know what i'd do without it. i have both kid's schools phone numbers programmed into it so i can call them from the road, if necessary. came in VERY handy when i got into my last accident on the way to pick up kailey from school. i had to call the school and tell them to send her on the bus as i wouldn't be making it with the car. ~~~ Imagine all the people, living life in peace - Lennon ~~~ ------------------------- gina, 31, ny single mom to - kailey, 8, autism, hyperlexia, depression, anxiety, OCD, DSI trevor, 3, multiple developmental delays, no " official " dx yet parker jade, due 7-25-03 :-D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 30, 2003 Report Share Posted March 30, 2003 > Actually, as I was writing that, the idea of a cellphone popped into mind, Debbie! LOL. It had honestly not occured to me before. I'm pretty anti-cellphone, so it never would have entered my mind. But this IS a good idea. < i used to be anti cellphone too, but when kailey started preschool and i was going to college, i knew i needed something for emergencies. i got a pager, because i couldn't afford a cellphone (remember, this was 6 years ago). it was helpful, but not helpful enough. a few years later, i got a tracfone, which is like a prepaid cellphone. that worked well, until it went for a swim in the toilet. then my mom got me a cellphone under her credit and i have it with me ALWAYS. i really don't know what i'd do without it. i have both kid's schools phone numbers programmed into it so i can call them from the road, if necessary. came in VERY handy when i got into my last accident on the way to pick up kailey from school. i had to call the school and tell them to send her on the bus as i wouldn't be making it with the car. ~~~ Imagine all the people, living life in peace - Lennon ~~~ ------------------------- gina, 31, ny single mom to - kailey, 8, autism, hyperlexia, depression, anxiety, OCD, DSI trevor, 3, multiple developmental delays, no " official " dx yet parker jade, due 7-25-03 :-D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 30, 2003 Report Share Posted March 30, 2003 > Actually, as I was writing that, the idea of a cellphone popped into mind, Debbie! LOL. It had honestly not occured to me before. I'm pretty anti-cellphone, so it never would have entered my mind. But this IS a good idea. < i used to be anti cellphone too, but when kailey started preschool and i was going to college, i knew i needed something for emergencies. i got a pager, because i couldn't afford a cellphone (remember, this was 6 years ago). it was helpful, but not helpful enough. a few years later, i got a tracfone, which is like a prepaid cellphone. that worked well, until it went for a swim in the toilet. then my mom got me a cellphone under her credit and i have it with me ALWAYS. i really don't know what i'd do without it. i have both kid's schools phone numbers programmed into it so i can call them from the road, if necessary. came in VERY handy when i got into my last accident on the way to pick up kailey from school. i had to call the school and tell them to send her on the bus as i wouldn't be making it with the car. ~~~ Imagine all the people, living life in peace - Lennon ~~~ ------------------------- gina, 31, ny single mom to - kailey, 8, autism, hyperlexia, depression, anxiety, OCD, DSI trevor, 3, multiple developmental delays, no " official " dx yet parker jade, due 7-25-03 :-D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 30, 2003 Report Share Posted March 30, 2003 If you're totally anti-celphone then I would suggest a pager. But I love having my celphone. I don't use it that often (well except at home for my long distance calls ... free minutes! We don't pay long distance for me to talk to my family anymore). But I love having it because I can run errands or take places while Jordan is at school. Or if I go out, DH can reach me in an emergency. Same with a sitter. In fact, my celphone number is the first contact number Jordan's school has for me because I'm usually running errands for the 2 hours he's in school. DH used to have a pager and that was great. I could always get ahold of him and we had little codes so he knew how urgent it was to call me back. A " 911 " after the number and he would call back immediately. Debbie with twins - Jordan (ASD) 2.5yo - (NT) 2.5yo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 30, 2003 Report Share Posted March 30, 2003 I carry a pager only when I'm away from the boys. They are the only reason I have it! Sue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 30, 2003 Report Share Posted March 30, 2003 That's Dan Marino who's son is " cured " . Doug Flutie's son is actually somewhat low functioning. Leigh > >>>>>>>>>>>>>>> > > Doug Flutie is the football player whose son is > > autistic. His commercial just came on my TV. > >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> > > Yeah, only now they claim he's cured. > > Tuna > > > > ===== > mom to: > , 8, ASD > , 4, NT > > Normal is just a setting on the washing machine. > - Whoopi Goldberg > > ______________________________________________________________________ > Post your free ad now! http://personals.yahoo.ca Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 30, 2003 Report Share Posted March 30, 2003 No, you're right ellen. Doug Flutie's little guy is still, well, little. Penny :-D RE: Re: Stupid Spouse Phrases I don't think it's his son they claim is cured, I think it was Dan Marino's son, but I could be wrong. ellen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 30, 2003 Report Share Posted March 30, 2003 No, you're right ellen. Doug Flutie's little guy is still, well, little. Penny :-D RE: Re: Stupid Spouse Phrases I don't think it's his son they claim is cured, I think it was Dan Marino's son, but I could be wrong. ellen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 30, 2003 Report Share Posted March 30, 2003 No, you're right ellen. Doug Flutie's little guy is still, well, little. Penny :-D RE: Re: Stupid Spouse Phrases I don't think it's his son they claim is cured, I think it was Dan Marino's son, but I could be wrong. ellen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 31, 2003 Report Share Posted March 31, 2003 > Now I know neither one of us is being whiney or trying to justify why we > CAN'T do something. > This complaint is REAL! Sure it is. There's even a book about it. Perhaps we've all heard of The Feminine Mystique? > > Could I go to school? Maybe. But when? During the day? and how? > Money is always an issue, but still, even if it weren't, the specifics of > schedule planning would be horrendous. No kidding. And for me, too, as the closest college campus is a 45 minute drive away. :-( > > My house is a disaster now. Can you imagine what it would be like if I was > NOT here more? I harbour a fantasy that mine would look better. LOL. > > I, like my spouse, would like to be able to get up in the morning, focus MY > energy toward something that is meaningful to ME. As it stands, my life's > focus is on Jacqui. Not that that's a bad thing, not at all, but it's the > fact that he just doesn't get it. Me too. As Marc said, after I was called on Friday and had to take out of school and to the doctor and then contend all day with a sick and pathetic autistic kid, THIS is why I'm still home. I AM needed, albeit on an on-call basis. Basically, the only job option open to me today is a counter person at a very understanding Mc's. Jacquie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 31, 2003 Report Share Posted March 31, 2003 > Now I know neither one of us is being whiney or trying to justify why we > CAN'T do something. > This complaint is REAL! Sure it is. There's even a book about it. Perhaps we've all heard of The Feminine Mystique? > > Could I go to school? Maybe. But when? During the day? and how? > Money is always an issue, but still, even if it weren't, the specifics of > schedule planning would be horrendous. No kidding. And for me, too, as the closest college campus is a 45 minute drive away. :-( > > My house is a disaster now. Can you imagine what it would be like if I was > NOT here more? I harbour a fantasy that mine would look better. LOL. > > I, like my spouse, would like to be able to get up in the morning, focus MY > energy toward something that is meaningful to ME. As it stands, my life's > focus is on Jacqui. Not that that's a bad thing, not at all, but it's the > fact that he just doesn't get it. Me too. As Marc said, after I was called on Friday and had to take out of school and to the doctor and then contend all day with a sick and pathetic autistic kid, THIS is why I'm still home. I AM needed, albeit on an on-call basis. Basically, the only job option open to me today is a counter person at a very understanding Mc's. Jacquie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 31, 2003 Report Share Posted March 31, 2003 > Now I know neither one of us is being whiney or trying to justify why we > CAN'T do something. > This complaint is REAL! Sure it is. There's even a book about it. Perhaps we've all heard of The Feminine Mystique? > > Could I go to school? Maybe. But when? During the day? and how? > Money is always an issue, but still, even if it weren't, the specifics of > schedule planning would be horrendous. No kidding. And for me, too, as the closest college campus is a 45 minute drive away. :-( > > My house is a disaster now. Can you imagine what it would be like if I was > NOT here more? I harbour a fantasy that mine would look better. LOL. > > I, like my spouse, would like to be able to get up in the morning, focus MY > energy toward something that is meaningful to ME. As it stands, my life's > focus is on Jacqui. Not that that's a bad thing, not at all, but it's the > fact that he just doesn't get it. Me too. As Marc said, after I was called on Friday and had to take out of school and to the doctor and then contend all day with a sick and pathetic autistic kid, THIS is why I'm still home. I AM needed, albeit on an on-call basis. Basically, the only job option open to me today is a counter person at a very understanding Mc's. Jacquie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 31, 2003 Report Share Posted March 31, 2003 >a woman is usually the center of > gravity in any family - - anything that changes in her life affects every > aspect of the family function and dynamic. My mom tells a story of going to see her doctor when the family was much younger and both my borther and I were living at home (so he was 17 or younger and I was 7 or younger) and she was very dpressed. The dr told her that they needed to treat it because she was the centre of the family and the happinessof the rest of us depended on her. She says she felt so cheated and trapped by that - like the world rested on her shoulders. Now I understand. Jacquie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 31, 2003 Report Share Posted March 31, 2003 > But, I'll go back to the " set the tone " statement. We set the tone for > the entire home ... if Mommy isn't happy, Nobody is happy. So it is > very important for us to find something that renews our spirit, uplifts > us, gives us pleasure and relaxation. My hobby and my volunteering took care of that for a LONG time. But those were cherished breaks and renewal moments out of a busy schedule of childcare. Now that is in school full time, just doing the housework and working at my hobby is not enough. still needs me to available, so I can't leave the house for long periods in case the school calls. I can't go volunteer at the school, because that would disrupt 's day and he would be forever trying to find me in the building rather than doing what he needs to do. For 6 years, my whole life was taking care of . It was learning about autism, working on goals, always having a forward momentum driven by the need to help be the best he could be. Breaks for painting were rejuvenating and life-restoring. Now, he is almost 7. He's in school full time, and getting As and Bs. His ATEC has dropped over 85 points since he was 3 years old. He has a playmate. He can hold conversations. When he's home at night and on weekends, the focus is not on therapy but on just filling up the time with things to do, or having Ben over and me doing - what? Nothing. Making dinner. The full-time job I had for 6 years is now part time, full time in the summer. The thing is, I LIKED my full-time job. I LIKED working so hard with him and the feeling of pride and accomplishment that almost each day carried with it. Compared to the past 6 years, my day-to-day present is BORING and EMPTY. I MISS him. Does that expain my dilemma better? Jacquie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 31, 2003 Report Share Posted March 31, 2003 > If you want something besides autism, there are TONS of free courses > online...I have sites bookmarked that I can send you if you are > interested. I also have the autism site bookmarked (if I go there > mid note I'll lose everything I've written. Sure, thanks, Raena! I have and Noble University bookmarked, but that's the only one I've found. They have a really interesting-looking free course called 'The Bible as Literature' that I'd love to take, but of course you have to buy the books... Jacquie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 31, 2003 Report Share Posted March 31, 2003 > You mentioned not being able to leave the house in case the school > calls. Have you thought of getting a pager or celphone? Pagers are > pretty inexpensive and it would be a way to not be tied to the phone at > home. Actually, as I was writing that, the idea of a cellphone popped into mind, Debbie! LOL. It had honestly not occured to me before. I'm pretty anti-cellphone, so it never would have entered my mind. But this IS a good idea. Thanks! Jacquie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 31, 2003 Report Share Posted March 31, 2003 > I don't have any recommendations for what to do--I can only offer sympathy and the personal experience that it does get better. If all else fails, there's always Days of Our Lives. > Welcome, Sophie! And here's an ungly confession -- I am a Passions fan. Now how pathetic is THAT? Jacquie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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