Guest guest Posted March 28, 2005 Report Share Posted March 28, 2005 Aynslie, Nobody hit rock bottom and hurt more people than I did. Nobody. That was BEFORE I was put on an antidepressant and an antipsychotic. Nevertheless, there came a point and this was during a high point in withdrawals that I did hold myself accountable and at the same time managed to look forward instead of behind. was right. Make your amends and let God handle the rest. THere is nothing else you can do. In the meantime you can become a living amends by taking the focus off yourself and onto others. It is an integral aspect to any sort of recovery in my opinion. Once I discovered this world didn't revolve around me and it actually was about what I did for others then things fell into place. Making my life about that has in time improved my own self-perception. However, if left to sit around and stew over lost friends, family, and fortune I would too often fall into the trap you are currently in. I don't feel good all the time, but those are the times to really take this new approach and put it into practice. That is what worked for me and I hope it helps you. God bless, Casey Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 28, 2005 Report Share Posted March 28, 2005 Aynslie, Nobody hit rock bottom and hurt more people than I did. Nobody. That was BEFORE I was put on an antidepressant and an antipsychotic. Nevertheless, there came a point and this was during a high point in withdrawals that I did hold myself accountable and at the same time managed to look forward instead of behind. was right. Make your amends and let God handle the rest. THere is nothing else you can do. In the meantime you can become a living amends by taking the focus off yourself and onto others. It is an integral aspect to any sort of recovery in my opinion. Once I discovered this world didn't revolve around me and it actually was about what I did for others then things fell into place. Making my life about that has in time improved my own self-perception. However, if left to sit around and stew over lost friends, family, and fortune I would too often fall into the trap you are currently in. I don't feel good all the time, but those are the times to really take this new approach and put it into practice. That is what worked for me and I hope it helps you. God bless, Casey Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 28, 2005 Report Share Posted March 28, 2005 Dear Aynslie, You said: <<Maybe so. Then again, maybe I believe that I shouldn't have to experience this level of discomfort alone.>> ** That's quite reasonable and healthy. How about saying that the next time? This came from your head where all our thinking takes place. Your post came from your emotions where no thinking takes place. It is precisely at these times of crisis that we need to be able to kick things up into our heads where they can be thought through. This does not mean we can't have emotions about it. It just means that some balance is necessary. Regards, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 29, 2005 Report Share Posted March 29, 2005 Thats OK , my input certainly isnt medical or probably very helpful ,but I see things from other sides as well . Cyndi .x What is life without a bit of love? Aynslie Hanna wrote: Cyndi,Thanks for the encouraging words. I appreciate them.Aynslieon 3/29/05 5:16 AM, cyndi white at cyndi2001uk@... wrote:> Oh Aynslie ,dont be so hard on yourself my love.Do we ever know what oe who we> really are ?Lots of issues shape our lives and ourselves .When I'm having a> good day ,I tend to worry that I'm actually enjoying myself ! I've wondered> how different I would have been without the meds I've taken ,for years now> .But isnt it all part of life ?I was sexually abused as a child ,and I'm> desperately trying to overcome this all these years later.As I said ,I've been> on pres. drugs for years ,but during those years I've had 5 lovely children> .If I had been drug free ,and perhaps thinking differently ,would it have> meant that one or more of them would not have been born?I cant bear that> thought ,I had a great amount of difficulties while bringing them up ,but I> wouldnt be without any of them . You sound such a lovely caring person ,I hope> you can find strength in the times when things upset you .We're all in this> battle together ,and we'll win ,we'll get there in the end. Hugs , Cyndi> .x To subscribe to the off-topic list go to: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/socialWandR/ from Cyndi in Cornwall xxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 29, 2005 Report Share Posted March 29, 2005 , That is one of my biggest problems right now--being overcome by emotions. Some days I am perfectly balanced and logical, and other days I can't think straight for all the feeling I'm doing. And, like yesterday, some days either one can come or go with no warning at all. Aynslie Re: When does it end? <html><body> <tt> Dear Aynslie,<BR> <BR> <BR> <BR> & nbsp; You said:<BR> <BR> <BR> <BR> & lt; & lt;Maybe so. Then again, maybe I believe that I shouldn't have to experience<BR> this level of discomfort alone. & gt; & gt;<BR> <BR> <BR> & nbsp; & nbsp; ** & nbsp; That's quite reasonable and healthy. & nbsp; How about saying that the next <BR> time? & nbsp; & nbsp; This came from your head where all our thinking takes place. & nbsp; Your <BR> post came from your emotions where no thinking takes place.<BR> <BR> <BR> & nbsp; & nbsp; It is precisely at these times of crisis that we need to be able to kick <BR> things up into our heads where they can be thought through. & nbsp; This does not <BR> mean we can't have emotions about it. & nbsp; It just means that some balance is <BR> necessary.<BR> <BR> Regards,<BR> <BR> <BR> <BR> </tt> <br><br> <tt> To subscribe to the off-topic list go to: <BR> <BR> <a href= " http://groups.yahoo.com/group/socialWandR/ " >http://groups.yahoo.com/group/\ socialWandR/</a> & nbsp; & nbsp; <BR> <BR> </tt> <br><br> <br> <!-- |**|begin egp html banner|**| --> <table border=0 cellspacing=0 cellpadding=2> <tr bgcolor=#FFFFCC> <td align=center><font size= " -1 " color=#003399><b>Yahoo! Groups Sponsor</b></font></td> </tr> <tr bgcolor=#FFFFFF> <td align=center width=470><table border=0 cellpadding=0 cellspacing=0> <tr> <td align=center><font face=arial size=-2>ADVERTISEMENT</font><br><a href= " http://us.ard.yahoo.com/SIG=12cjm9b1a/M=298184.6018725.7038619.3001176/D=g\ rphealth/S=1705118787:HM/EXP=1112166297/A=2593423/R=0/SIG=11el9gslf/*http://www.\ netflix.com/Default?mqso=60190075 " alt= " " ><img src= " http://us.a1.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/a/ne/netflix/22305_0205_016_b_300250_a.gi\ f " alt= " click here " width= " 300 " height= " 250 " border= " 0 " ></a></td></tr></table> </td> </tr> <tr><td><img alt= " " width=1 height=1 src= " http://us.adserver.yahoo.com/l?M=298184.6018725.7038619.3001176/D=grphealth\ /S=:HM/A=2593423/rand=454032588 " ></td></tr> </table> <!-- |**|end egp html banner|**| --> <!-- |**|begin egp html banner|**| --> <br> <tt><hr width= " 500 " > <b> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 12, 2005 Report Share Posted April 12, 2005 --- " Long time. I'm eight and a half months, off Paxil and two weeks off benzos. I've got a long road ahead of me, but it feels like too long already. " Eight months and two weeks off of benzo is no time at all my friend. These drugs are highly poisonous to our systems, your body needs and deserves a long time to recover. Take strength from the group and rejoice in each improvement you see in yourself. once told me to look to Glitter as my role model when I feel as you do at the moment. Be proud of yourself that you are off these drugs and take courage that every day your body is repairing and your mind is becoming free again. On waking each morning I give simple Thanks to God that I escaped with my life....I thank him for the support and love of this group and for the future I now have. It isn't easy many times I am very frightened because I still remember the horrific madness in my mind when I came off seroxat but talking to everyone here who understands makes me feel less alone. Hope this helps a little? Much Love to you In Withdrawal_and_Recovery , Shea Carney <sheacarney@y...> wrote: > Hi all, > > I saw my local neurologist today. I have a brain " spot, " according to an MRI. Don't know what it is, but it's in my right frontal lobe? A migraine spot, perhaps, was the suggestion of the doctor. > > He also stated that a year, in recovery, following an injury of the brain is " opptomistic. " He said it more commonly takes up to 18 months, and two years is the " pessimistic " stance, on how quickly the brain recovers. > > Long time. I'm eight and a half months, off Paxil and two weeks off benzos. I've got a long road ahead of me, but it feels like too long already. > > -Shea > > deerlodge321 <deerlodge321@y...> wrote: > > > " Withered " is such an apt word for what I think we all are feeling/have > felt. I know I, too, feel I haven't the will to go on (I fight > suicidality constantly it seems), strength, and the heart to soldier on > and create something else? " You've got to be kidding! " scoffs the > larger part of me. " I can barely get out of bed half the time. " > > But I think Glitter (Hi, Glitter, don't know if you ever got my email - > do you mind if I ask you something personally?) is much further down > the path, certainly than I am, I'm not sure about where you are, > Aynslie. But she and others give me hope. Just the visualization of > her going through Paxil withdrawal, feverishly scribbling on pieces of > paper when she could and then one day being able to put it all together > and begin creating a new life for herself lends so much inspiration. > > Try not to despair (said the despairing one) - remember the motto: > This is all part of the withdrawal/recovery, and it won't last forever. > > Even though it darn tootin' seems like permanent descent into Dante's > Hell, or being forever trapped in Munch's Scream. (I'd use Glitter's > tableau analogy, but I can't spell it ;-) > > Ummmm....from the sound of it, it appears my children are in the midst > of their own war.....if anyone sees the Easter Bunny, will you *please* > tell it to stop giving sugar-laden candy to my kids without my > permission??? Thanks. > > Hang in there, Aynslie, it will get better. > Fondly, > ~~~dl > > > > > > At the moment, I just haven't got the will, the strength or the heart > to > > soldier on and create something else. I feel too withered inside. > > > > Aynslie > > > > > > > > > > To subscribe to the off-topic list go to: > > http://groups.yahoo.com/group/socialWandR/ > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 12, 2005 Report Share Posted April 12, 2005 > > Something really scary happened to me yesterday. Hi Aynslie...my son experienced some very odd things early on (his weaning off paxil). He's never been able to read well. He was diagnosed as being dyslexic at a very young age. Anyway, while in the " throws " of withdrawal he came to me one evening and calmly said, " Mom, I think I can read " . I just looked at him and honestly thought this was just another weird hallucination or something...he said again, " Mom, I'm serious..I can read. " So he picks up the TV guide and begins reading to me...PERFECTLY. He picked up the classifieds and again began to read to me again (this time he was had tears running down his face (happy ones of course). We were in total shock. He's always been able to recognize words, but he had trouble putting them all together. Anyway, it was a very remarkable moment...unfortunately it didn't last excpet a day or two. We were so hoping it would linger forever. What you experienced and what my son experienced just goes to show how much these drugs " scramble ones brain chemistry " . Oddly enough, with my son, the part of his brain that wasn't working correctly (the dyslexic part) became " unscrambled " during this time. I can't explain why the words in the story you were reading were there and not there...but, I can assure you it did have something to do with what you're going through! Healthy, Happy Blessing~ Cheryl Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 12, 2005 Report Share Posted April 12, 2005 Hi Aynslie, It helps me to know that I'm not alone in it to. When I first tried to get off seroxat no one had any idea of withdrawal effects, I literally thought I was going mad. I am glad we all have each others love and support here, I feel safe here. I no longer trust my doctors, but I have complete trust in , so it is safe here for me. Keep talking and sharing, it helps you and it helps all of us to. Big Hugs xx In Withdrawal_and_Recovery , Aynslie <elswyth@m...> wrote: > > , > > You said: > > It isn't easy many times I am very frightened because I still remember the horrific madness in my mind when I came off seroxat but talking to everyone here who understands makes me feel less alone. > > ***I remember that " horrific madness. " I went through it, too--and I had no idea what was happening or that it was even related to the drugs I'd discontinued. But those two words describe it perfectly. On the one hand, it's really encouraging to hear different peoples' words of hope and healing, but on the other hand, having journeyed through that " horrific madness " in complete loneliness, it's very reassuring to hear stories that reassure me that my experience wasn't mine alone. So thanks for putting such an apt label on an experience we've shared. That meant a lot to me. > > Aynslie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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