Re: MIL rant

[Guest guest]

I am glad Nick supports you, it makes it much easier when your husband is on your side. Good luck, hope it gets better.

My children will remember when they are older, who was around during good times AND bad times. It certainly was NOT my MIL. It is HER loss. Joanmom to Hayden 2 1/233 degrees1st cast down from 62 degrees Treated at ish Rite Hospital Dallas, TX

To: infantile_scoliosis Sent: Mon, November 30, 2009 1:05:37 PMSubject: Re: MIL rant

Thank you, Joan! What's crazy is that I tried so hard for it not to become a conflict- I hate confrontation- I even asked my husband and my friend to be aware if she strted acting like that so I could escape- but even that didn't stop her. How can any Grandma make light of what Hayden and you are going through?

I'm just going to avoid her for a long time, luckily (saint) Nick supports me in this!Heidi, Bexon's Mama, (2 years old, in 4th cast from Salt Lake City Shriners, currently down from 61 degrees to 21)

From: Joan Vallee <hayro1611yahoo (DOT) com>To: infantile_scoliosis @yahoogroups. comSent: Mon, November 30, 2009 10:41:37 AMSubject: Re: [infantile_scoliosi s] MIL rant

Heidi, I like 's idea of putting her on probation. I have done that lately with my MIL, she doesn't GET the whole situation with Hayden either and makes very LIGHT of it.. So, I do not call her, answer her calls, return her calls or communicate with her AT ALL. If she wants to know what is going on with Bex, then she can call your husband. Just remove yourself from HER life. I know she is your husbands mother, but it doesn't mean you have to communicate with her. And when she is there for obligitory holidays, just be your self and enjoy your day and ignore her. I have learned to do this and it has helped me a lot. I used to get upset but the only person that it hurts is YOU. Good luck I hope you don't have to spend Christmas with her as well.

HUGS to you and Bex. Joanmom to Hayden 2 1/233 degrees1st cast down from 62 degrees Treated at ish Rite Hospital Dallas, TX

From: McSheffrey <teresamcsheffrey@ yahoo..com>To: infantile_scoliosis @yahoogroups. comSent: Mon, November 30, 2009 12:07:19 PMSubject: Re: [infantile_scoliosi s] MIL rant

Heidi,

I feel for you girl!! I know your pain. I will say though that my MIL has become slightly better.. I would put her on "probation" meaning that I would not answer the phone, talk with her by email, or have anything to do with her after she pissed me off. I don't know if she finally "got it" or if she just mellowed out.

My MIL hates my dogs, doesn't understand why I am a vegetarian, tries to feed my kids junk constantly, doesn't understand why my daughter needs a booster seat, says I am overprotective of my kids,ect, ect, ect. I can do nothing right but at least she knows I don't care what she thinks anymore.

From: NIck Guthe <nickgutheyahoo (DOT) com>To: infantile_scoliosis @yahoogroups. comSent: Mon, November 30, 2009 12:54:35 PMSubject: [infantile_scoliosi s] MIL rant

Hi, well, I think this relates to casting, because we certainly do not need additional stress put on us by our families, we are travelling for cast 5 in less than 2 weeks. Why don't family members GET IT????

Okay, I agreed to host Thanksgiving at our house with only 2 requests: that is be easy and stress free, and I did not want to spend all day cooking the turkey. I've only cooked a turkey once, so I offered to buy it or my MIL or my friend Britt could cook it- no pressure, only if they desired. Britt happily offered, my MIL insisted she would do it.

We cleaned the house top to bottom, spent days making lists and shopping at 4 different stores (and paying for) all of the food, waiting in lines, etc. I spent 4 hours Thanksgiving morning cleaning and preparing a lunch we could all eat while cooking, while getting Bex ready, washing his hair over the sink, etc.

My MIL is like the mother from "Everybody Loves ". She created extreme stress from the moment she arrived, taking over my kitchen and ordering me around like the Queen of Sheba. All she was making was a turkey and packaged stuffing! I and my friend Britt made everything else. When my friend arrived with 3 wonderful homemade dishes, my MIL was rude to her and insulted her, too, with directives- insisting we now could NOT have mashed potatoes and green beans, because Britt had brought roasted potatoes and brussel sprouts! And then she made Britt feel bad because she announced that she doesn't eat brussel sprouts (but she would suffer by not having a green vegetable now.)

I asked my husband to talk to her, but it continued until I confronted her. I said this is my home, I can serve what I want to in my own home- I serve serve green beans if I want green beans! She apologized but then shot looks at my stepfather about me, in front of me. The next day, she told me what I could or could not order at lunch- and she wasn't even paying for it!

I finially told her I am not a child, and I am not her child. I am practically 40! She then cried to my husband for 45 minutes, saying she "slipped"- this is a women who is very smart and knows what she is saying. Why are people so selfish, when we are going through a lot, right now? ARGHH! Heidi, Bexon's Mama, (2 years old, in 4th cast from Salt Lake City Shriners, currently down from 61 degrees to 21)

[Guest guest]

I am glad Nick supports you, it makes it much easier when your husband is on your side. Good luck, hope it gets better.

My children will remember when they are older, who was around during good times AND bad times. It certainly was NOT my MIL. It is HER loss. Joanmom to Hayden 2 1/233 degrees1st cast down from 62 degrees Treated at ish Rite Hospital Dallas, TX

To: infantile_scoliosis Sent: Mon, November 30, 2009 1:05:37 PMSubject: Re: MIL rant

Thank you, Joan! What's crazy is that I tried so hard for it not to become a conflict- I hate confrontation- I even asked my husband and my friend to be aware if she strted acting like that so I could escape- but even that didn't stop her. How can any Grandma make light of what Hayden and you are going through?

I'm just going to avoid her for a long time, luckily (saint) Nick supports me in this!Heidi, Bexon's Mama, (2 years old, in 4th cast from Salt Lake City Shriners, currently down from 61 degrees to 21)

From: Joan Vallee <hayro1611yahoo (DOT) com>To: infantile_scoliosis @yahoogroups. comSent: Mon, November 30, 2009 10:41:37 AMSubject: Re: [infantile_scoliosi s] MIL rant

Heidi, I like 's idea of putting her on probation. I have done that lately with my MIL, she doesn't GET the whole situation with Hayden either and makes very LIGHT of it.. So, I do not call her, answer her calls, return her calls or communicate with her AT ALL. If she wants to know what is going on with Bex, then she can call your husband. Just remove yourself from HER life. I know she is your husbands mother, but it doesn't mean you have to communicate with her. And when she is there for obligitory holidays, just be your self and enjoy your day and ignore her. I have learned to do this and it has helped me a lot. I used to get upset but the only person that it hurts is YOU. Good luck I hope you don't have to spend Christmas with her as well.

HUGS to you and Bex. Joanmom to Hayden 2 1/233 degrees1st cast down from 62 degrees Treated at ish Rite Hospital Dallas, TX

From: McSheffrey <teresamcsheffrey@ yahoo..com>To: infantile_scoliosis @yahoogroups. comSent: Mon, November 30, 2009 12:07:19 PMSubject: Re: [infantile_scoliosi s] MIL rant

Heidi,

I feel for you girl!! I know your pain. I will say though that my MIL has become slightly better.. I would put her on "probation" meaning that I would not answer the phone, talk with her by email, or have anything to do with her after she pissed me off. I don't know if she finally "got it" or if she just mellowed out.

My MIL hates my dogs, doesn't understand why I am a vegetarian, tries to feed my kids junk constantly, doesn't understand why my daughter needs a booster seat, says I am overprotective of my kids,ect, ect, ect. I can do nothing right but at least she knows I don't care what she thinks anymore.

From: NIck Guthe <nickgutheyahoo (DOT) com>To: infantile_scoliosis @yahoogroups. comSent: Mon, November 30, 2009 12:54:35 PMSubject: [infantile_scoliosi s] MIL rant

Hi, well, I think this relates to casting, because we certainly do not need additional stress put on us by our families, we are travelling for cast 5 in less than 2 weeks. Why don't family members GET IT????

Okay, I agreed to host Thanksgiving at our house with only 2 requests: that is be easy and stress free, and I did not want to spend all day cooking the turkey. I've only cooked a turkey once, so I offered to buy it or my MIL or my friend Britt could cook it- no pressure, only if they desired. Britt happily offered, my MIL insisted she would do it.

We cleaned the house top to bottom, spent days making lists and shopping at 4 different stores (and paying for) all of the food, waiting in lines, etc. I spent 4 hours Thanksgiving morning cleaning and preparing a lunch we could all eat while cooking, while getting Bex ready, washing his hair over the sink, etc.

My MIL is like the mother from "Everybody Loves ". She created extreme stress from the moment she arrived, taking over my kitchen and ordering me around like the Queen of Sheba. All she was making was a turkey and packaged stuffing! I and my friend Britt made everything else. When my friend arrived with 3 wonderful homemade dishes, my MIL was rude to her and insulted her, too, with directives- insisting we now could NOT have mashed potatoes and green beans, because Britt had brought roasted potatoes and brussel sprouts! And then she made Britt feel bad because she announced that she doesn't eat brussel sprouts (but she would suffer by not having a green vegetable now.)

I asked my husband to talk to her, but it continued until I confronted her. I said this is my home, I can serve what I want to in my own home- I serve serve green beans if I want green beans! She apologized but then shot looks at my stepfather about me, in front of me. The next day, she told me what I could or could not order at lunch- and she wasn't even paying for it!

I finially told her I am not a child, and I am not her child. I am practically 40! She then cried to my husband for 45 minutes, saying she "slipped"- this is a women who is very smart and knows what she is saying. Why are people so selfish, when we are going through a lot, right now? ARGHH! Heidi, Bexon's Mama, (2 years old, in 4th cast from Salt Lake City Shriners, currently down from 61 degrees to 21)

[Guest guest]

Oh, Heidi,

I'm so sorry that you had to go through this. Can't say that I can relate as my MIL is...ok, drives me a little crazy now and then but who doesn't. She lives 4 1/2 hrs away and we don't see her alot. My mom on the other hand is WONDERFUL, would like to be at every appt if she could. She has traveled to SLC with us a few times, not because we need her to, but because she wants to. Noah is the last (10th) of her grandchildren and is adored by all! We are very grateful!

My sister-in-law is another story. Her daughter was diagnosed PIS as a toddler and wore a brace for years before having spinal fusion. She was also treated in SLC by a diff doc. Casting was not available at that point and they did not make her wear her brace faithfully. So you would think if anyone would "get it" it would be her!! She lives 45 min south of SLC and does not make the effort to drive up to see us. We even offer to drive down and she always comes up with some excuse...drives me crazy. At this point I could care less about seeing her and her husband, I just want to see my beautiful neices and nephew! WHATEVER!!

I think that is why this group is so important...we ALL get it!! I'm sure every parent on here can remember the day of diagnosis (Oct 28, 2005), the 1st MRI (April 22, 2006) and 1st casting day (Sept 19, 2006) like they were all yesterday. We lived it and continue to live it. Whether it's wondering what would have happened if you would have got "the correct" care earlier, choose casting earlier or whatever. Every one of us has been though every step of this, however not together physically...definitally emotionally!! I am so thankful for everyone on here. I don't post much, but read alot of the post and even though I may not say it, I appreciate everyone and am so grateful for everything everyone has done!

You are a wonderful person Heidi!! I know easier said then done, but try not to let her get to you. You don't need to waste one more ounce of energy on her when you have such a beautiful little man that appreciates all of your energy.

Have a wonderful day.

Noah 4yrs 4mo, 9 casts 3 braces, 80 degrees to 17 in brace, SLC Shriners

Subject: MIL rantTo: infantile_scoliosis Date: Monday, November 30, 2009, 10:54 AM

Hi, well, I think this relates to casting, because we certainly do not need additional stress put on us by our families, we are travelling for cast 5 in less than 2 weeks. Why don't family members GET IT????

Okay, I agreed to host Thanksgiving at our house with only 2 requests: that is be easy and stress free, and I did not want to spend all day cooking the turkey. I've only cooked a turkey once, so I offered to buy it or my MIL or my friend Britt could cook it- no pressure, only if they desired. Britt happily offered, my MIL insisted she would do it.

We cleaned the house top to bottom, spent days making lists and shopping at 4 different stores (and paying for) all of the food, waiting in lines, etc. I spent 4 hours Thanksgiving morning cleaning and preparing a lunch we could all eat while cooking, while getting Bex ready, washing his hair over the sink, etc.

My MIL is like the mother from "Everybody Loves ". She created extreme stress from the moment she arrived, taking over my kitchen and ordering me around like the Queen of Sheba. All she was making was a turkey and packaged stuffing! I and my friend Britt made everything else. When my friend arrived with 3 wonderful homemade dishes, my MIL was rude to her and insulted her, too, with directives- insisting we now could NOT have mashed potatoes and green beans, because Britt had brought roasted potatoes and brussel sprouts! And then she made Britt feel bad because she announced that she doesn't eat brussel sprouts (but she would suffer by not having a green vegetable now.)

I asked my husband to talk to her, but it continued until I confronted her. I said this is my home, I can serve what I want to in my own home- I serve serve green beans if I want green beans! She apologized but then shot looks at my stepfather about me, in front of me. The next day, she told me what I could or could not order at lunch- and she wasn't even paying for it!

I finially told her I am not a child, and I am not her child. I am practically 40! She then cried to my husband for 45 minutes, saying she "slipped"- this is a women who is very smart and knows what she is saying. Why are people so selfish, when we are going through a lot, right now? ARGHH! Heidi, Bexon's Mama, (2 years old, in 4th cast from Salt Lake City Shriners, currently down from 61 degrees to 21)

[Guest guest]

Oh, Heidi,

I'm so sorry that you had to go through this. Can't say that I can relate as my MIL is...ok, drives me a little crazy now and then but who doesn't. She lives 4 1/2 hrs away and we don't see her alot. My mom on the other hand is WONDERFUL, would like to be at every appt if she could. She has traveled to SLC with us a few times, not because we need her to, but because she wants to. Noah is the last (10th) of her grandchildren and is adored by all! We are very grateful!

My sister-in-law is another story. Her daughter was diagnosed PIS as a toddler and wore a brace for years before having spinal fusion. She was also treated in SLC by a diff doc. Casting was not available at that point and they did not make her wear her brace faithfully. So you would think if anyone would "get it" it would be her!! She lives 45 min south of SLC and does not make the effort to drive up to see us. We even offer to drive down and she always comes up with some excuse...drives me crazy. At this point I could care less about seeing her and her husband, I just want to see my beautiful neices and nephew! WHATEVER!!

I think that is why this group is so important...we ALL get it!! I'm sure every parent on here can remember the day of diagnosis (Oct 28, 2005), the 1st MRI (April 22, 2006) and 1st casting day (Sept 19, 2006) like they were all yesterday. We lived it and continue to live it. Whether it's wondering what would have happened if you would have got "the correct" care earlier, choose casting earlier or whatever. Every one of us has been though every step of this, however not together physically...definitally emotionally!! I am so thankful for everyone on here. I don't post much, but read alot of the post and even though I may not say it, I appreciate everyone and am so grateful for everything everyone has done!

You are a wonderful person Heidi!! I know easier said then done, but try not to let her get to you. You don't need to waste one more ounce of energy on her when you have such a beautiful little man that appreciates all of your energy.

Have a wonderful day.

Noah 4yrs 4mo, 9 casts 3 braces, 80 degrees to 17 in brace, SLC Shriners

Subject: MIL rantTo: infantile_scoliosis Date: Monday, November 30, 2009, 10:54 AM

Hi, well, I think this relates to casting, because we certainly do not need additional stress put on us by our families, we are travelling for cast 5 in less than 2 weeks. Why don't family members GET IT????

Okay, I agreed to host Thanksgiving at our house with only 2 requests: that is be easy and stress free, and I did not want to spend all day cooking the turkey. I've only cooked a turkey once, so I offered to buy it or my MIL or my friend Britt could cook it- no pressure, only if they desired. Britt happily offered, my MIL insisted she would do it.

We cleaned the house top to bottom, spent days making lists and shopping at 4 different stores (and paying for) all of the food, waiting in lines, etc. I spent 4 hours Thanksgiving morning cleaning and preparing a lunch we could all eat while cooking, while getting Bex ready, washing his hair over the sink, etc.

My MIL is like the mother from "Everybody Loves ". She created extreme stress from the moment she arrived, taking over my kitchen and ordering me around like the Queen of Sheba. All she was making was a turkey and packaged stuffing! I and my friend Britt made everything else. When my friend arrived with 3 wonderful homemade dishes, my MIL was rude to her and insulted her, too, with directives- insisting we now could NOT have mashed potatoes and green beans, because Britt had brought roasted potatoes and brussel sprouts! And then she made Britt feel bad because she announced that she doesn't eat brussel sprouts (but she would suffer by not having a green vegetable now.)

I asked my husband to talk to her, but it continued until I confronted her. I said this is my home, I can serve what I want to in my own home- I serve serve green beans if I want green beans! She apologized but then shot looks at my stepfather about me, in front of me. The next day, she told me what I could or could not order at lunch- and she wasn't even paying for it!

I finially told her I am not a child, and I am not her child. I am practically 40! She then cried to my husband for 45 minutes, saying she "slipped"- this is a women who is very smart and knows what she is saying. Why are people so selfish, when we are going through a lot, right now? ARGHH! Heidi, Bexon's Mama, (2 years old, in 4th cast from Salt Lake City Shriners, currently down from 61 degrees to 21)

[Guest guest]

Oh, Heidi,

I'm so sorry that you had to go through this. Can't say that I can relate as my MIL is...ok, drives me a little crazy now and then but who doesn't. She lives 4 1/2 hrs away and we don't see her alot. My mom on the other hand is WONDERFUL, would like to be at every appt if she could. She has traveled to SLC with us a few times, not because we need her to, but because she wants to. Noah is the last (10th) of her grandchildren and is adored by all! We are very grateful!

My sister-in-law is another story. Her daughter was diagnosed PIS as a toddler and wore a brace for years before having spinal fusion. She was also treated in SLC by a diff doc. Casting was not available at that point and they did not make her wear her brace faithfully. So you would think if anyone would "get it" it would be her!! She lives 45 min south of SLC and does not make the effort to drive up to see us. We even offer to drive down and she always comes up with some excuse...drives me crazy. At this point I could care less about seeing her and her husband, I just want to see my beautiful neices and nephew! WHATEVER!!

I think that is why this group is so important...we ALL get it!! I'm sure every parent on here can remember the day of diagnosis (Oct 28, 2005), the 1st MRI (April 22, 2006) and 1st casting day (Sept 19, 2006) like they were all yesterday. We lived it and continue to live it. Whether it's wondering what would have happened if you would have got "the correct" care earlier, choose casting earlier or whatever. Every one of us has been though every step of this, however not together physically...definitally emotionally!! I am so thankful for everyone on here. I don't post much, but read alot of the post and even though I may not say it, I appreciate everyone and am so grateful for everything everyone has done!

You are a wonderful person Heidi!! I know easier said then done, but try not to let her get to you. You don't need to waste one more ounce of energy on her when you have such a beautiful little man that appreciates all of your energy.

Have a wonderful day.

Noah 4yrs 4mo, 9 casts 3 braces, 80 degrees to 17 in brace, SLC Shriners

Subject: MIL rantTo: infantile_scoliosis Date: Monday, November 30, 2009, 10:54 AM

Hi, well, I think this relates to casting, because we certainly do not need additional stress put on us by our families, we are travelling for cast 5 in less than 2 weeks. Why don't family members GET IT????

Okay, I agreed to host Thanksgiving at our house with only 2 requests: that is be easy and stress free, and I did not want to spend all day cooking the turkey. I've only cooked a turkey once, so I offered to buy it or my MIL or my friend Britt could cook it- no pressure, only if they desired. Britt happily offered, my MIL insisted she would do it.

We cleaned the house top to bottom, spent days making lists and shopping at 4 different stores (and paying for) all of the food, waiting in lines, etc. I spent 4 hours Thanksgiving morning cleaning and preparing a lunch we could all eat while cooking, while getting Bex ready, washing his hair over the sink, etc.

My MIL is like the mother from "Everybody Loves ". She created extreme stress from the moment she arrived, taking over my kitchen and ordering me around like the Queen of Sheba. All she was making was a turkey and packaged stuffing! I and my friend Britt made everything else. When my friend arrived with 3 wonderful homemade dishes, my MIL was rude to her and insulted her, too, with directives- insisting we now could NOT have mashed potatoes and green beans, because Britt had brought roasted potatoes and brussel sprouts! And then she made Britt feel bad because she announced that she doesn't eat brussel sprouts (but she would suffer by not having a green vegetable now.)

I asked my husband to talk to her, but it continued until I confronted her. I said this is my home, I can serve what I want to in my own home- I serve serve green beans if I want green beans! She apologized but then shot looks at my stepfather about me, in front of me. The next day, she told me what I could or could not order at lunch- and she wasn't even paying for it!

I finially told her I am not a child, and I am not her child. I am practically 40! She then cried to my husband for 45 minutes, saying she "slipped"- this is a women who is very smart and knows what she is saying. Why are people so selfish, when we are going through a lot, right now? ARGHH! Heidi, Bexon's Mama, (2 years old, in 4th cast from Salt Lake City Shriners, currently down from 61 degrees to 21)

[Guest guest]

Heidi you are a WONDERFUL mother...just look at what you are doing for Bex! I'm

sorry you dont have a very supportive MIL. I fortunately do, but have

encountered people such as your MIL and I tend to feel a little sorry for them,

rather than angry. We dont always know what goes on in people's lives to make

them the way they are, so try (easier said than done of course) to let it roll

off your shoulder. Glad you stood up for yourself though!

Dianna (mommy to Marcela, 18 mos. in 3rd cast)

>

> Hi, well, I think this relates to casting, because we certainly do not need

additional stress put on us by our families, we are travelling for cast 5 in

less than 2 weeks. Why don't family members GET IT????

>

> Okay, I agreed to host Thanksgiving at our house with only 2 requests: that is

be easy and stress free, and I did not want to spend all day cooking the turkey.

I've only cooked a turkey once, so I offered to buy it or my MIL or my

friend Britt could cook it- no pressure, only if they desired. Britt happily

offered, my MIL insisted she would do it.

>

> We cleaned the house top to bottom, spent days making lists and shopping at 4

different stores (and paying for) all of the food, waiting in lines, etc. I

spent 4 hours Thanksgiving morning cleaning and preparing a lunch we could all

eat while cooking, while getting Bex ready, washing his hair over the sink, etc.

>

> My MIL is like the mother from " Everybody Loves " . She created extreme

stress from the moment she arrived, taking over my kitchen and ordering me

around like the Queen of Sheba. All she was making was a turkey and packaged

stuffing! I and my friend Britt made everything else. When my friend arrived

with 3 wonderful homemade dishes, my MIL was rude to her and insulted her, too,

with directives- insisting we now could NOT have mashed potatoes and green

beans, because Britt had brought roasted potatoes and brussel sprouts! And then

she made Britt feel bad because she announced that she doesn't eat brussel

sprouts (but she would suffer by not having a green vegetable now.)

>

> I asked my husband to talk to her, but it continued until I confronted her. I

said this is my home, I can serve what I want to in my own home- I serve serve

green beans if I want green beans! She apologized but then shot looks at my

stepfather about me, in front of me. The next day, she told me what I could or

could not order at lunch- and she wasn't even paying for it!

>

> I finially told her I am not a child, and I am not her child. I am practically

40! She then cried to my husband for 45 minutes, saying she " slipped " - this is a

women who is very smart and knows what she is saying. Why are people so selfish,

when we are going through a lot, right now? ARGHH!

>  Heidi, Bexon's Mama, (2 years old, in 4th cast from Salt Lake City Shriners,

currently down from 61 degrees to 21)

>

[Guest guest]

Heidi you are a WONDERFUL mother...just look at what you are doing for Bex! I'm

sorry you dont have a very supportive MIL. I fortunately do, but have

encountered people such as your MIL and I tend to feel a little sorry for them,

rather than angry. We dont always know what goes on in people's lives to make

them the way they are, so try (easier said than done of course) to let it roll

off your shoulder. Glad you stood up for yourself though!

Dianna (mommy to Marcela, 18 mos. in 3rd cast)

>

> Hi, well, I think this relates to casting, because we certainly do not need

additional stress put on us by our families, we are travelling for cast 5 in

less than 2 weeks. Why don't family members GET IT????

>

> Okay, I agreed to host Thanksgiving at our house with only 2 requests: that is

be easy and stress free, and I did not want to spend all day cooking the turkey.

I've only cooked a turkey once, so I offered to buy it or my MIL or my

friend Britt could cook it- no pressure, only if they desired. Britt happily

offered, my MIL insisted she would do it.

>

> We cleaned the house top to bottom, spent days making lists and shopping at 4

different stores (and paying for) all of the food, waiting in lines, etc. I

spent 4 hours Thanksgiving morning cleaning and preparing a lunch we could all

eat while cooking, while getting Bex ready, washing his hair over the sink, etc.

>

> My MIL is like the mother from " Everybody Loves " . She created extreme

stress from the moment she arrived, taking over my kitchen and ordering me

around like the Queen of Sheba. All she was making was a turkey and packaged

stuffing! I and my friend Britt made everything else. When my friend arrived

with 3 wonderful homemade dishes, my MIL was rude to her and insulted her, too,

with directives- insisting we now could NOT have mashed potatoes and green

beans, because Britt had brought roasted potatoes and brussel sprouts! And then

she made Britt feel bad because she announced that she doesn't eat brussel

sprouts (but she would suffer by not having a green vegetable now.)

>

> I asked my husband to talk to her, but it continued until I confronted her. I

said this is my home, I can serve what I want to in my own home- I serve serve

green beans if I want green beans! She apologized but then shot looks at my

stepfather about me, in front of me. The next day, she told me what I could or

could not order at lunch- and she wasn't even paying for it!

>

> I finially told her I am not a child, and I am not her child. I am practically

40! She then cried to my husband for 45 minutes, saying she " slipped " - this is a

women who is very smart and knows what she is saying. Why are people so selfish,

when we are going through a lot, right now? ARGHH!

>  Heidi, Bexon's Mama, (2 years old, in 4th cast from Salt Lake City Shriners,

currently down from 61 degrees to 21)

>

[Guest guest]

Heidi you are a WONDERFUL mother...just look at what you are doing for Bex! I'm

sorry you dont have a very supportive MIL. I fortunately do, but have

encountered people such as your MIL and I tend to feel a little sorry for them,

rather than angry. We dont always know what goes on in people's lives to make

them the way they are, so try (easier said than done of course) to let it roll

off your shoulder. Glad you stood up for yourself though!

Dianna (mommy to Marcela, 18 mos. in 3rd cast)

>

> Hi, well, I think this relates to casting, because we certainly do not need

additional stress put on us by our families, we are travelling for cast 5 in

less than 2 weeks. Why don't family members GET IT????

>

> Okay, I agreed to host Thanksgiving at our house with only 2 requests: that is

be easy and stress free, and I did not want to spend all day cooking the turkey.

I've only cooked a turkey once, so I offered to buy it or my MIL or my

friend Britt could cook it- no pressure, only if they desired. Britt happily

offered, my MIL insisted she would do it.

>

> We cleaned the house top to bottom, spent days making lists and shopping at 4

different stores (and paying for) all of the food, waiting in lines, etc. I

spent 4 hours Thanksgiving morning cleaning and preparing a lunch we could all

eat while cooking, while getting Bex ready, washing his hair over the sink, etc.

>

> My MIL is like the mother from " Everybody Loves " . She created extreme

stress from the moment she arrived, taking over my kitchen and ordering me

around like the Queen of Sheba. All she was making was a turkey and packaged

stuffing! I and my friend Britt made everything else. When my friend arrived

with 3 wonderful homemade dishes, my MIL was rude to her and insulted her, too,

with directives- insisting we now could NOT have mashed potatoes and green

beans, because Britt had brought roasted potatoes and brussel sprouts! And then

she made Britt feel bad because she announced that she doesn't eat brussel

sprouts (but she would suffer by not having a green vegetable now.)

>

> I asked my husband to talk to her, but it continued until I confronted her. I

said this is my home, I can serve what I want to in my own home- I serve serve

green beans if I want green beans! She apologized but then shot looks at my

stepfather about me, in front of me. The next day, she told me what I could or

could not order at lunch- and she wasn't even paying for it!

>

> I finially told her I am not a child, and I am not her child. I am practically

40! She then cried to my husband for 45 minutes, saying she " slipped " - this is a

women who is very smart and knows what she is saying. Why are people so selfish,

when we are going through a lot, right now? ARGHH!

>  Heidi, Bexon's Mama, (2 years old, in 4th cast from Salt Lake City Shriners,

currently down from 61 degrees to 21)

>

[Guest guest]

Heidi,

Im so sorry. I can just picture her. I watch reruns of everybody loves and i cant stand the type or could i imagine living with that in my family. I cant say my MIL isnt bad at all but my own father leaves much to be desired. He didnt even call after Isaiah's brain surgery or before his 1st cast. Matter of fact the 1st we heard from him was just about 3 weeks ago and he had the nerve to say, oh by the way how did the surgery go?? Like it was no big deal and it happened in AUGUST!!! This is November!!! I said, well oviously he survived. He acts like the cast is a no big deal thing and its mostly for cosmetic reasons even though i have explained it is life saving. WHY DONT PEOPLE GET IT???

Anyway, now im on a rant! Im glad you stood up to her and put her in her place. Im glad you will have Christmas with your family and i hope she got the hint and will be nicer next time. We all love you Heidi!!!!

Subject: MIL rantTo: infantile_scoliosis Date: Monday, November 30, 2009, 11:54 AM

Hi, well, I think this relates to casting, because we certainly do not need additional stress put on us by our families, we are travelling for cast 5 in less than 2 weeks. Why don't family members GET IT????

Okay, I agreed to host Thanksgiving at our house with only 2 requests: that is be easy and stress free, and I did not want to spend all day cooking the turkey. I've only cooked a turkey once, so I offered to buy it or my MIL or my friend Britt could cook it- no pressure, only if they desired. Britt happily offered, my MIL insisted she would do it.

We cleaned the house top to bottom, spent days making lists and shopping at 4 different stores (and paying for) all of the food, waiting in lines, etc. I spent 4 hours Thanksgiving morning cleaning and preparing a lunch we could all eat while cooking, while getting Bex ready, washing his hair over the sink, etc.

My MIL is like the mother from "Everybody Loves ". She created extreme stress from the moment she arrived, taking over my kitchen and ordering me around like the Queen of Sheba. All she was making was a turkey and packaged stuffing! I and my friend Britt made everything else. When my friend arrived with 3 wonderful homemade dishes, my MIL was rude to her and insulted her, too, with directives- insisting we now could NOT have mashed potatoes and green beans, because Britt had brought roasted potatoes and brussel sprouts! And then she made Britt feel bad because she announced that she doesn't eat brussel sprouts (but she would suffer by not having a green vegetable now.)

I asked my husband to talk to her, but it continued until I confronted her. I said this is my home, I can serve what I want to in my own home- I serve serve green beans if I want green beans! She apologized but then shot looks at my stepfather about me, in front of me. The next day, she told me what I could or could not order at lunch- and she wasn't even paying for it!

I finially told her I am not a child, and I am not her child. I am practically 40! She then cried to my husband for 45 minutes, saying she "slipped"- this is a women who is very smart and knows what she is saying. Why are people so selfish, when we are going through a lot, right now? ARGHH! Heidi, Bexon's Mama, (2 years old, in 4th cast from Salt Lake City Shriners, currently down from 61 degrees to 21)

[Guest guest]

Heidi,

Im so sorry. I can just picture her. I watch reruns of everybody loves and i cant stand the type or could i imagine living with that in my family. I cant say my MIL isnt bad at all but my own father leaves much to be desired. He didnt even call after Isaiah's brain surgery or before his 1st cast. Matter of fact the 1st we heard from him was just about 3 weeks ago and he had the nerve to say, oh by the way how did the surgery go?? Like it was no big deal and it happened in AUGUST!!! This is November!!! I said, well oviously he survived. He acts like the cast is a no big deal thing and its mostly for cosmetic reasons even though i have explained it is life saving. WHY DONT PEOPLE GET IT???

Anyway, now im on a rant! Im glad you stood up to her and put her in her place. Im glad you will have Christmas with your family and i hope she got the hint and will be nicer next time. We all love you Heidi!!!!

Subject: MIL rantTo: infantile_scoliosis Date: Monday, November 30, 2009, 11:54 AM

Hi, well, I think this relates to casting, because we certainly do not need additional stress put on us by our families, we are travelling for cast 5 in less than 2 weeks. Why don't family members GET IT????

Okay, I agreed to host Thanksgiving at our house with only 2 requests: that is be easy and stress free, and I did not want to spend all day cooking the turkey. I've only cooked a turkey once, so I offered to buy it or my MIL or my friend Britt could cook it- no pressure, only if they desired. Britt happily offered, my MIL insisted she would do it.

We cleaned the house top to bottom, spent days making lists and shopping at 4 different stores (and paying for) all of the food, waiting in lines, etc. I spent 4 hours Thanksgiving morning cleaning and preparing a lunch we could all eat while cooking, while getting Bex ready, washing his hair over the sink, etc.

My MIL is like the mother from "Everybody Loves ". She created extreme stress from the moment she arrived, taking over my kitchen and ordering me around like the Queen of Sheba. All she was making was a turkey and packaged stuffing! I and my friend Britt made everything else. When my friend arrived with 3 wonderful homemade dishes, my MIL was rude to her and insulted her, too, with directives- insisting we now could NOT have mashed potatoes and green beans, because Britt had brought roasted potatoes and brussel sprouts! And then she made Britt feel bad because she announced that she doesn't eat brussel sprouts (but she would suffer by not having a green vegetable now.)

I asked my husband to talk to her, but it continued until I confronted her. I said this is my home, I can serve what I want to in my own home- I serve serve green beans if I want green beans! She apologized but then shot looks at my stepfather about me, in front of me. The next day, she told me what I could or could not order at lunch- and she wasn't even paying for it!

I finially told her I am not a child, and I am not her child. I am practically 40! She then cried to my husband for 45 minutes, saying she "slipped"- this is a women who is very smart and knows what she is saying. Why are people so selfish, when we are going through a lot, right now? ARGHH! Heidi, Bexon's Mama, (2 years old, in 4th cast from Salt Lake City Shriners, currently down from 61 degrees to 21)

[Guest guest]

Heidi,

Im so sorry. I can just picture her. I watch reruns of everybody loves and i cant stand the type or could i imagine living with that in my family. I cant say my MIL isnt bad at all but my own father leaves much to be desired. He didnt even call after Isaiah's brain surgery or before his 1st cast. Matter of fact the 1st we heard from him was just about 3 weeks ago and he had the nerve to say, oh by the way how did the surgery go?? Like it was no big deal and it happened in AUGUST!!! This is November!!! I said, well oviously he survived. He acts like the cast is a no big deal thing and its mostly for cosmetic reasons even though i have explained it is life saving. WHY DONT PEOPLE GET IT???

Anyway, now im on a rant! Im glad you stood up to her and put her in her place. Im glad you will have Christmas with your family and i hope she got the hint and will be nicer next time. We all love you Heidi!!!!

Subject: MIL rantTo: infantile_scoliosis Date: Monday, November 30, 2009, 11:54 AM

Hi, well, I think this relates to casting, because we certainly do not need additional stress put on us by our families, we are travelling for cast 5 in less than 2 weeks. Why don't family members GET IT????

Okay, I agreed to host Thanksgiving at our house with only 2 requests: that is be easy and stress free, and I did not want to spend all day cooking the turkey. I've only cooked a turkey once, so I offered to buy it or my MIL or my friend Britt could cook it- no pressure, only if they desired. Britt happily offered, my MIL insisted she would do it.

We cleaned the house top to bottom, spent days making lists and shopping at 4 different stores (and paying for) all of the food, waiting in lines, etc. I spent 4 hours Thanksgiving morning cleaning and preparing a lunch we could all eat while cooking, while getting Bex ready, washing his hair over the sink, etc.

My MIL is like the mother from "Everybody Loves ". She created extreme stress from the moment she arrived, taking over my kitchen and ordering me around like the Queen of Sheba. All she was making was a turkey and packaged stuffing! I and my friend Britt made everything else. When my friend arrived with 3 wonderful homemade dishes, my MIL was rude to her and insulted her, too, with directives- insisting we now could NOT have mashed potatoes and green beans, because Britt had brought roasted potatoes and brussel sprouts! And then she made Britt feel bad because she announced that she doesn't eat brussel sprouts (but she would suffer by not having a green vegetable now.)

I asked my husband to talk to her, but it continued until I confronted her. I said this is my home, I can serve what I want to in my own home- I serve serve green beans if I want green beans! She apologized but then shot looks at my stepfather about me, in front of me. The next day, she told me what I could or could not order at lunch- and she wasn't even paying for it!

I finially told her I am not a child, and I am not her child. I am practically 40! She then cried to my husband for 45 minutes, saying she "slipped"- this is a women who is very smart and knows what she is saying. Why are people so selfish, when we are going through a lot, right now? ARGHH! Heidi, Bexon's Mama, (2 years old, in 4th cast from Salt Lake City Shriners, currently down from 61 degrees to 21)

[Guest guest]

Oh wow....someone has a MIL very much like mine. Just this summer while staying at her house my husband went to check his email on her computer. It was set up in the kitchen, in full view of ANYONE! When Brant went to move the mouse to get the screen saver off there was an email open and it was bashing ME, THE BOYS and Brant! We were so mad, but not surprised. Long story short......he later came clean that he read it, but basically told her off. I was so hurt and MAD! We have decided to keep our distance with his parents. I'm done. I'll be cordial, but that is it!This was nothing new. She has been like this for years(Brant says all his life)and I could go on and on with stories.All I wanted to say is......is it worth it to spend

ONE day with her if she is going to ruin it and make you feel so awful. Then you spend the next few weeks trying to get over it. People like this DO NOT change!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My MIL also plays the victim. It is NEVER her fault. Someone else brought it all on, she says. I am so sorry your Thanksgiving was so bad. You are a wonderful mother. ((HUGS)) TashaMommy of 4 year old twin boys- and Fort Worth, TexasSeries of 6 casts for 14 months and now in a night brace. is treated at Texas ish Rite Hospital.You can read 's story at....http://www.infantilescoliosis.org/stories.htmlFrom: NIck Guthe To: infantile_scoliosis Sent: Mon, November 30, 2009 11:54:35 AMSubject: MIL rant

Hi, well, I think this relates to casting, because we certainly do not need additional stress put on us by our families, we are travelling for cast 5 in less than 2 weeks. Why don't family members GET IT????

Okay, I agreed to host Thanksgiving at our house with only 2 requests: that is be easy and stress free, and I did not want to spend all day cooking the turkey. I've only cooked a turkey once, so I offered to buy it or my MIL or my friend Britt could cook it- no pressure, only if they desired. Britt happily offered, my MIL insisted she would do it.

We cleaned the house top to bottom, spent days making lists and shopping at 4 different stores (and paying for) all of the food, waiting in lines, etc. I spent 4 hours Thanksgiving morning cleaning and preparing a lunch we could all eat while cooking, while getting Bex ready, washing his hair over the sink, etc.

My MIL is like the mother from "Everybody Loves ". She created extreme stress from the moment she arrived, taking over my kitchen and ordering me around like the Queen of Sheba. All she was making was a turkey and packaged stuffing! I and my friend Britt made everything else. When my friend arrived with 3 wonderful homemade dishes, my MIL was rude to her and insulted her, too, with directives- insisting we now could NOT have mashed potatoes and green beans, because Britt had brought roasted potatoes and brussel sprouts! And then she made Britt feel bad because she announced that she doesn't eat brussel sprouts (but she would suffer by not having a green vegetable now.)

I asked my husband to talk to her, but it continued until I confronted her. I said this is my home, I can serve what I want to in my own home- I serve serve green beans if I want green beans! She apologized but then shot looks at my stepfather about me, in front of me. The next day, she told me what I could or could not order at lunch- and she wasn't even paying for it!

I finially told her I am not a child, and I am not her child. I am practically 40! She then cried to my husband for 45 minutes, saying she "slipped"- this is a women who is very smart and knows what she is saying. Why are people so selfish, when we are going through a lot, right now? ARGHH! Heidi, Bexon's Mama, (2 years old, in 4th cast from Salt Lake City Shriners, currently down from 61 degrees to 21)

[Guest guest]

Oh wow....someone has a MIL very much like mine. Just this summer while staying at her house my husband went to check his email on her computer. It was set up in the kitchen, in full view of ANYONE! When Brant went to move the mouse to get the screen saver off there was an email open and it was bashing ME, THE BOYS and Brant! We were so mad, but not surprised. Long story short......he later came clean that he read it, but basically told her off. I was so hurt and MAD! We have decided to keep our distance with his parents. I'm done. I'll be cordial, but that is it!This was nothing new. She has been like this for years(Brant says all his life)and I could go on and on with stories.All I wanted to say is......is it worth it to spend

ONE day with her if she is going to ruin it and make you feel so awful. Then you spend the next few weeks trying to get over it. People like this DO NOT change!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My MIL also plays the victim. It is NEVER her fault. Someone else brought it all on, she says. I am so sorry your Thanksgiving was so bad. You are a wonderful mother. ((HUGS)) TashaMommy of 4 year old twin boys- and Fort Worth, TexasSeries of 6 casts for 14 months and now in a night brace. is treated at Texas ish Rite Hospital.You can read 's story at....http://www.infantilescoliosis.org/stories.htmlFrom: NIck Guthe To: infantile_scoliosis Sent: Mon, November 30, 2009 11:54:35 AMSubject: MIL rant

Hi, well, I think this relates to casting, because we certainly do not need additional stress put on us by our families, we are travelling for cast 5 in less than 2 weeks. Why don't family members GET IT????

Okay, I agreed to host Thanksgiving at our house with only 2 requests: that is be easy and stress free, and I did not want to spend all day cooking the turkey. I've only cooked a turkey once, so I offered to buy it or my MIL or my friend Britt could cook it- no pressure, only if they desired. Britt happily offered, my MIL insisted she would do it.

We cleaned the house top to bottom, spent days making lists and shopping at 4 different stores (and paying for) all of the food, waiting in lines, etc. I spent 4 hours Thanksgiving morning cleaning and preparing a lunch we could all eat while cooking, while getting Bex ready, washing his hair over the sink, etc.

My MIL is like the mother from "Everybody Loves ". She created extreme stress from the moment she arrived, taking over my kitchen and ordering me around like the Queen of Sheba. All she was making was a turkey and packaged stuffing! I and my friend Britt made everything else. When my friend arrived with 3 wonderful homemade dishes, my MIL was rude to her and insulted her, too, with directives- insisting we now could NOT have mashed potatoes and green beans, because Britt had brought roasted potatoes and brussel sprouts! And then she made Britt feel bad because she announced that she doesn't eat brussel sprouts (but she would suffer by not having a green vegetable now.)

I asked my husband to talk to her, but it continued until I confronted her. I said this is my home, I can serve what I want to in my own home- I serve serve green beans if I want green beans! She apologized but then shot looks at my stepfather about me, in front of me. The next day, she told me what I could or could not order at lunch- and she wasn't even paying for it!

I finially told her I am not a child, and I am not her child. I am practically 40! She then cried to my husband for 45 minutes, saying she "slipped"- this is a women who is very smart and knows what she is saying. Why are people so selfish, when we are going through a lot, right now? ARGHH! Heidi, Bexon's Mama, (2 years old, in 4th cast from Salt Lake City Shriners, currently down from 61 degrees to 21)

[Guest guest]

Oh wow....someone has a MIL very much like mine. Just this summer while staying at her house my husband went to check his email on her computer. It was set up in the kitchen, in full view of ANYONE! When Brant went to move the mouse to get the screen saver off there was an email open and it was bashing ME, THE BOYS and Brant! We were so mad, but not surprised. Long story short......he later came clean that he read it, but basically told her off. I was so hurt and MAD! We have decided to keep our distance with his parents. I'm done. I'll be cordial, but that is it!This was nothing new. She has been like this for years(Brant says all his life)and I could go on and on with stories.All I wanted to say is......is it worth it to spend

ONE day with her if she is going to ruin it and make you feel so awful. Then you spend the next few weeks trying to get over it. People like this DO NOT change!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My MIL also plays the victim. It is NEVER her fault. Someone else brought it all on, she says. I am so sorry your Thanksgiving was so bad. You are a wonderful mother. ((HUGS)) TashaMommy of 4 year old twin boys- and Fort Worth, TexasSeries of 6 casts for 14 months and now in a night brace. is treated at Texas ish Rite Hospital.You can read 's story at....http://www.infantilescoliosis.org/stories.htmlFrom: NIck Guthe To: infantile_scoliosis Sent: Mon, November 30, 2009 11:54:35 AMSubject: MIL rant

Hi, well, I think this relates to casting, because we certainly do not need additional stress put on us by our families, we are travelling for cast 5 in less than 2 weeks. Why don't family members GET IT????

Okay, I agreed to host Thanksgiving at our house with only 2 requests: that is be easy and stress free, and I did not want to spend all day cooking the turkey. I've only cooked a turkey once, so I offered to buy it or my MIL or my friend Britt could cook it- no pressure, only if they desired. Britt happily offered, my MIL insisted she would do it.

We cleaned the house top to bottom, spent days making lists and shopping at 4 different stores (and paying for) all of the food, waiting in lines, etc. I spent 4 hours Thanksgiving morning cleaning and preparing a lunch we could all eat while cooking, while getting Bex ready, washing his hair over the sink, etc.

My MIL is like the mother from "Everybody Loves ". She created extreme stress from the moment she arrived, taking over my kitchen and ordering me around like the Queen of Sheba. All she was making was a turkey and packaged stuffing! I and my friend Britt made everything else. When my friend arrived with 3 wonderful homemade dishes, my MIL was rude to her and insulted her, too, with directives- insisting we now could NOT have mashed potatoes and green beans, because Britt had brought roasted potatoes and brussel sprouts! And then she made Britt feel bad because she announced that she doesn't eat brussel sprouts (but she would suffer by not having a green vegetable now.)

I asked my husband to talk to her, but it continued until I confronted her. I said this is my home, I can serve what I want to in my own home- I serve serve green beans if I want green beans! She apologized but then shot looks at my stepfather about me, in front of me. The next day, she told me what I could or could not order at lunch- and she wasn't even paying for it!

I finially told her I am not a child, and I am not her child. I am practically 40! She then cried to my husband for 45 minutes, saying she "slipped"- this is a women who is very smart and knows what she is saying. Why are people so selfish, when we are going through a lot, right now? ARGHH! Heidi, Bexon's Mama, (2 years old, in 4th cast from Salt Lake City Shriners, currently down from 61 degrees to 21)

[Guest guest]

They absolutely should try to make our lives easier.  Casting and traveling are stressful.  Hosting a holiday is stressful.  You were doing her a favor and she should have been gracious not difficult.  Hang in there and feel free to rant to me any time. 

Jenn

Mommy to Cole, 23 months, 3rd cast from rochester, 18 degrees out of cast down from 47, chiari malformation

[Guest guest]

They absolutely should try to make our lives easier.  Casting and traveling are stressful.  Hosting a holiday is stressful.  You were doing her a favor and she should have been gracious not difficult.  Hang in there and feel free to rant to me any time. 

Jenn

Mommy to Cole, 23 months, 3rd cast from rochester, 18 degrees out of cast down from 47, chiari malformation

[Guest guest]

They absolutely should try to make our lives easier.  Casting and traveling are stressful.  Hosting a holiday is stressful.  You were doing her a favor and she should have been gracious not difficult.  Hang in there and feel free to rant to me any time. 

Jenn

Mommy to Cole, 23 months, 3rd cast from rochester, 18 degrees out of cast down from 47, chiari malformation

[Guest guest]

Well Put!

Jenn

Mommy to Cole, 23 months, 3rd cast from rochester, 18 degrees out of

cast, chiari malformation

[Guest guest]

Well Put!

Jenn

Mommy to Cole, 23 months, 3rd cast from rochester, 18 degrees out of

cast, chiari malformation

[Guest guest]

Well Put!

Jenn

Mommy to Cole, 23 months, 3rd cast from rochester, 18 degrees out of

cast, chiari malformation

[Guest guest]

WELL SAID!!! Heidi, Bexon's Mama, (2 years old, in 4th cast from Salt Lake City Shriners, currently down from 61 degrees to 21)

To: infantile_scoliosis Sent: Mon, November 30, 2009 1:15:47 PMSubject: Re: MIL rant

Why is it we feel like just because people are related we are suppossed to tolerate them? There is no way any one of us would let in or invite someone so rude and offensive into our homes so why do we do it for "family?" I think after many years of thinking about how i was treated by my father after my mother died when i was 13 is this: We cannot choose who we are related to BUT we can choose who we allow into our lives and how we allow them to treat us. We can also choose how we respond to them. As adults (i did not have the option as a child) we have the POWER to choose who we allow the PRIVILEDGE to be in our lives and the lives of our children. If they dont make you or yours feel loved and respected they are not worth your time or energy. Holidays are about spending time with those who we love and who love us. Why pretend for 1 day a year that things are any different? Surround yourself

with people who love and respect you. Forget the rest. You have the power and you are worth it!!

All of you would be welcome to my house for the holidays any time!! Thanks for everyone and all of your love and support. I CHOOSE you all to be a part of my family!!

From: Tasha Fontenot <ryanswalkyahoo (DOT) com>Subject: Re: [infantile_scoliosi s] MIL rantTo: infantile_scoliosis @yahoogroups. comDate: Monday, November 30, 2009, 2:35 PM

Oh wow....someone has a MIL very much like mine. Just this summer while staying at her house my husband went to check his email on her computer. It was set up in the kitchen, in full view of ANYONE! When Brant went to move the mouse to get the screen saver off there was an email open and it was bashing ME, THE BOYS and Brant! We were so mad, but not surprised. Long story short......he later came clean that he read it, but basically told her off. I was so hurt and MAD! We have decided to keep our distance with his parents. I'm done. I'll be cordial, but that is it!This was nothing new. She has been like this for years(Brant says all his life)and I could go on and on with stories.All I wanted to say is......is it worth it to spend ONE day with her if she is going to ruin it and make you feel so awful. Then

you spend the next few weeks trying to get over it. People like this DO NOT change!!!!!! !!!!!!!!! !!!!! My MIL also plays the victim. It is NEVER her fault. Someone else brought it all on, she says. I am so sorry your Thanksgiving was so bad. You are a wonderful mother. ((HUGS))

TashaMommy of 4 year old twin boys- and Fort Worth, TexasSeries of 6 casts for 14 months and now in a night brace. is treated at Texas ish Rite Hospital.You can read 's story at....http://www.infantil escoliosis. org/stories. html

From: NIck Guthe <nickgutheyahoo (DOT) com>To: infantile_scoliosis @yahoogroups. comSent: Mon, November 30, 2009 11:54:35 AMSubject: [infantile_scoliosi s] MIL rant

Hi, well, I think this relates to casting, because we certainly do not need additional stress put on us by our families, we are travelling for cast 5 in less than 2 weeks. Why don't family members GET IT????

Okay, I agreed to host Thanksgiving at our house with only 2 requests: that is be easy and stress free, and I did not want to spend all day cooking the turkey. I've only cooked a turkey once, so I offered to buy it or my MIL or my friend Britt could cook it- no pressure, only if they desired. Britt happily offered, my MIL insisted she would do it.

We cleaned the house top to bottom, spent days making lists and shopping at 4 different stores (and paying for) all of the food, waiting in lines, etc. I spent 4 hours Thanksgiving morning cleaning and preparing a lunch we could all eat while cooking, while getting Bex ready, washing his hair over the sink, etc.

My MIL is like the mother from "Everybody Loves ". She created extreme stress from the moment she arrived, taking over my kitchen and ordering me around like the Queen of Sheba. All she was making was a turkey and packaged stuffing! I and my friend Britt made everything else. When my friend arrived with 3 wonderful homemade dishes, my MIL was rude to her and insulted her, too, with directives- insisting we now could NOT have mashed potatoes and green beans, because Britt had brought roasted potatoes and brussel sprouts! And then she made Britt feel bad because she announced that she doesn't eat brussel sprouts (but she would suffer by not having a green vegetable now.)

I asked my husband to talk to her, but it continued until I confronted her. I said this is my home, I can serve what I want to in my own home- I serve serve green beans if I want green beans! She apologized but then shot looks at my stepfather about me, in front of me. The next day, she told me what I could or could not order at lunch- and she wasn't even paying for it!

I finially told her I am not a child, and I am not her child. I am practically 40! She then cried to my husband for 45 minutes, saying she "slipped"- this is a women who is very smart and knows what she is saying. Why are people so selfish, when we are going through a lot, right now? ARGHH! Heidi, Bexon's Mama, (2 years old, in 4th cast from Salt Lake City Shriners, currently down from 61 degrees to 21)

[Guest guest]

WELL SAID!!! Heidi, Bexon's Mama, (2 years old, in 4th cast from Salt Lake City Shriners, currently down from 61 degrees to 21)

To: infantile_scoliosis Sent: Mon, November 30, 2009 1:15:47 PMSubject: Re: MIL rant

Why is it we feel like just because people are related we are suppossed to tolerate them? There is no way any one of us would let in or invite someone so rude and offensive into our homes so why do we do it for "family?" I think after many years of thinking about how i was treated by my father after my mother died when i was 13 is this: We cannot choose who we are related to BUT we can choose who we allow into our lives and how we allow them to treat us. We can also choose how we respond to them. As adults (i did not have the option as a child) we have the POWER to choose who we allow the PRIVILEDGE to be in our lives and the lives of our children. If they dont make you or yours feel loved and respected they are not worth your time or energy. Holidays are about spending time with those who we love and who love us. Why pretend for 1 day a year that things are any different? Surround yourself

with people who love and respect you. Forget the rest. You have the power and you are worth it!!

All of you would be welcome to my house for the holidays any time!! Thanks for everyone and all of your love and support. I CHOOSE you all to be a part of my family!!

From: Tasha Fontenot <ryanswalkyahoo (DOT) com>Subject: Re: [infantile_scoliosi s] MIL rantTo: infantile_scoliosis @yahoogroups. comDate: Monday, November 30, 2009, 2:35 PM

Oh wow....someone has a MIL very much like mine. Just this summer while staying at her house my husband went to check his email on her computer. It was set up in the kitchen, in full view of ANYONE! When Brant went to move the mouse to get the screen saver off there was an email open and it was bashing ME, THE BOYS and Brant! We were so mad, but not surprised. Long story short......he later came clean that he read it, but basically told her off. I was so hurt and MAD! We have decided to keep our distance with his parents. I'm done. I'll be cordial, but that is it!This was nothing new. She has been like this for years(Brant says all his life)and I could go on and on with stories.All I wanted to say is......is it worth it to spend ONE day with her if she is going to ruin it and make you feel so awful. Then

you spend the next few weeks trying to get over it. People like this DO NOT change!!!!!! !!!!!!!!! !!!!! My MIL also plays the victim. It is NEVER her fault. Someone else brought it all on, she says. I am so sorry your Thanksgiving was so bad. You are a wonderful mother. ((HUGS))

TashaMommy of 4 year old twin boys- and Fort Worth, TexasSeries of 6 casts for 14 months and now in a night brace. is treated at Texas ish Rite Hospital.You can read 's story at....http://www.infantil escoliosis. org/stories. html

From: NIck Guthe <nickgutheyahoo (DOT) com>To: infantile_scoliosis @yahoogroups. comSent: Mon, November 30, 2009 11:54:35 AMSubject: [infantile_scoliosi s] MIL rant

Hi, well, I think this relates to casting, because we certainly do not need additional stress put on us by our families, we are travelling for cast 5 in less than 2 weeks. Why don't family members GET IT????

Okay, I agreed to host Thanksgiving at our house with only 2 requests: that is be easy and stress free, and I did not want to spend all day cooking the turkey. I've only cooked a turkey once, so I offered to buy it or my MIL or my friend Britt could cook it- no pressure, only if they desired. Britt happily offered, my MIL insisted she would do it.

We cleaned the house top to bottom, spent days making lists and shopping at 4 different stores (and paying for) all of the food, waiting in lines, etc. I spent 4 hours Thanksgiving morning cleaning and preparing a lunch we could all eat while cooking, while getting Bex ready, washing his hair over the sink, etc.

My MIL is like the mother from "Everybody Loves ". She created extreme stress from the moment she arrived, taking over my kitchen and ordering me around like the Queen of Sheba. All she was making was a turkey and packaged stuffing! I and my friend Britt made everything else. When my friend arrived with 3 wonderful homemade dishes, my MIL was rude to her and insulted her, too, with directives- insisting we now could NOT have mashed potatoes and green beans, because Britt had brought roasted potatoes and brussel sprouts! And then she made Britt feel bad because she announced that she doesn't eat brussel sprouts (but she would suffer by not having a green vegetable now.)

I asked my husband to talk to her, but it continued until I confronted her. I said this is my home, I can serve what I want to in my own home- I serve serve green beans if I want green beans! She apologized but then shot looks at my stepfather about me, in front of me. The next day, she told me what I could or could not order at lunch- and she wasn't even paying for it!

I finially told her I am not a child, and I am not her child. I am practically 40! She then cried to my husband for 45 minutes, saying she "slipped"- this is a women who is very smart and knows what she is saying. Why are people so selfish, when we are going through a lot, right now? ARGHH! Heidi, Bexon's Mama, (2 years old, in 4th cast from Salt Lake City Shriners, currently down from 61 degrees to 21)

[Guest guest]

WELL SAID!!! Heidi, Bexon's Mama, (2 years old, in 4th cast from Salt Lake City Shriners, currently down from 61 degrees to 21)

To: infantile_scoliosis Sent: Mon, November 30, 2009 1:15:47 PMSubject: Re: MIL rant

Why is it we feel like just because people are related we are suppossed to tolerate them? There is no way any one of us would let in or invite someone so rude and offensive into our homes so why do we do it for "family?" I think after many years of thinking about how i was treated by my father after my mother died when i was 13 is this: We cannot choose who we are related to BUT we can choose who we allow into our lives and how we allow them to treat us. We can also choose how we respond to them. As adults (i did not have the option as a child) we have the POWER to choose who we allow the PRIVILEDGE to be in our lives and the lives of our children. If they dont make you or yours feel loved and respected they are not worth your time or energy. Holidays are about spending time with those who we love and who love us. Why pretend for 1 day a year that things are any different? Surround yourself

with people who love and respect you. Forget the rest. You have the power and you are worth it!!

All of you would be welcome to my house for the holidays any time!! Thanks for everyone and all of your love and support. I CHOOSE you all to be a part of my family!!

From: Tasha Fontenot <ryanswalkyahoo (DOT) com>Subject: Re: [infantile_scoliosi s] MIL rantTo: infantile_scoliosis @yahoogroups. comDate: Monday, November 30, 2009, 2:35 PM

Oh wow....someone has a MIL very much like mine. Just this summer while staying at her house my husband went to check his email on her computer. It was set up in the kitchen, in full view of ANYONE! When Brant went to move the mouse to get the screen saver off there was an email open and it was bashing ME, THE BOYS and Brant! We were so mad, but not surprised. Long story short......he later came clean that he read it, but basically told her off. I was so hurt and MAD! We have decided to keep our distance with his parents. I'm done. I'll be cordial, but that is it!This was nothing new. She has been like this for years(Brant says all his life)and I could go on and on with stories.All I wanted to say is......is it worth it to spend ONE day with her if she is going to ruin it and make you feel so awful. Then

you spend the next few weeks trying to get over it. People like this DO NOT change!!!!!! !!!!!!!!! !!!!! My MIL also plays the victim. It is NEVER her fault. Someone else brought it all on, she says. I am so sorry your Thanksgiving was so bad. You are a wonderful mother. ((HUGS))

TashaMommy of 4 year old twin boys- and Fort Worth, TexasSeries of 6 casts for 14 months and now in a night brace. is treated at Texas ish Rite Hospital.You can read 's story at....http://www.infantil escoliosis. org/stories. html

From: NIck Guthe <nickgutheyahoo (DOT) com>To: infantile_scoliosis @yahoogroups. comSent: Mon, November 30, 2009 11:54:35 AMSubject: [infantile_scoliosi s] MIL rant

Hi, well, I think this relates to casting, because we certainly do not need additional stress put on us by our families, we are travelling for cast 5 in less than 2 weeks. Why don't family members GET IT????

Okay, I agreed to host Thanksgiving at our house with only 2 requests: that is be easy and stress free, and I did not want to spend all day cooking the turkey. I've only cooked a turkey once, so I offered to buy it or my MIL or my friend Britt could cook it- no pressure, only if they desired. Britt happily offered, my MIL insisted she would do it.

We cleaned the house top to bottom, spent days making lists and shopping at 4 different stores (and paying for) all of the food, waiting in lines, etc. I spent 4 hours Thanksgiving morning cleaning and preparing a lunch we could all eat while cooking, while getting Bex ready, washing his hair over the sink, etc.

My MIL is like the mother from "Everybody Loves ". She created extreme stress from the moment she arrived, taking over my kitchen and ordering me around like the Queen of Sheba. All she was making was a turkey and packaged stuffing! I and my friend Britt made everything else. When my friend arrived with 3 wonderful homemade dishes, my MIL was rude to her and insulted her, too, with directives- insisting we now could NOT have mashed potatoes and green beans, because Britt had brought roasted potatoes and brussel sprouts! And then she made Britt feel bad because she announced that she doesn't eat brussel sprouts (but she would suffer by not having a green vegetable now.)

I asked my husband to talk to her, but it continued until I confronted her. I said this is my home, I can serve what I want to in my own home- I serve serve green beans if I want green beans! She apologized but then shot looks at my stepfather about me, in front of me. The next day, she told me what I could or could not order at lunch- and she wasn't even paying for it!

I finially told her I am not a child, and I am not her child. I am practically 40! She then cried to my husband for 45 minutes, saying she "slipped"- this is a women who is very smart and knows what she is saying. Why are people so selfish, when we are going through a lot, right now? ARGHH! Heidi, Bexon's Mama, (2 years old, in 4th cast from Salt Lake City Shriners, currently down from 61 degrees to 21)

[Guest guest]

It is 12 weeks a year IF the company is big enough plus i think you have to work for the company for a year but i could be wrong on that. I doubt a new job espically in a small town would be too keen on hiring someone with those circumstances but you are not required to divulge such info and they are not allowed to ask. Plus to get FMLA there is a ton of paperwork involved! Not sure if the time taken has to equal a number of consecutive days in a row or not. I just hope i wont have to return to work and find out myself!!!

Subject: Re: MIL rantTo: infantile_scoliosis Date: Monday, November 30, 2009, 5:32 PM

Thanks for correcting that! Even better!

Jenn

Mommy to Cole, 23 months, 3rd cast from rochester, 18 degrees out of cast down from 47, chiari malformation

[Guest guest]

It is 12 weeks a year IF the company is big enough plus i think you have to work for the company for a year but i could be wrong on that. I doubt a new job espically in a small town would be too keen on hiring someone with those circumstances but you are not required to divulge such info and they are not allowed to ask. Plus to get FMLA there is a ton of paperwork involved! Not sure if the time taken has to equal a number of consecutive days in a row or not. I just hope i wont have to return to work and find out myself!!!

Subject: Re: MIL rantTo: infantile_scoliosis Date: Monday, November 30, 2009, 5:32 PM

Thanks for correcting that! Even better!

Jenn

Mommy to Cole, 23 months, 3rd cast from rochester, 18 degrees out of cast down from 47, chiari malformation