Fwd: [fibrochatter] Fw: Happy Friday - Fw: 8 Morons of 2005

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Ruth Shay <ruthinsayville@...> wrote: fibrochatter From: "Ruth Shay" <ruthinsayville@...>Date: Sat, 13 May 2006 01:58:52 GMTSubject: [fibrochatter] Fw: Happy Friday - Fw: 8 Morons of 2005 hope these give you as big a laugh as theygave me.......................... From: Dotty KitlarSent: Fri, 12 May 2006 05:35:53 -0700JOHNCONBETHPA020@..., enrpetkus@..., ko'malley@..., pat@..., carlson123@...,

lglazier@..., b747doc@..., m.scida@..., ruthinsayville@..., jdark2256@..., abcmom657@..., dreeder3@...Subject: Happy Friday - Fw: 8 Morons of 2005 These are really funny! > 1. WILL THE REAL DUMMY PLEASE STAND UP? AT & T fired President >Walter after nine months, saying he lacked intellectual leadership. He >received a $26 million severance package. Perhaps it's not Walter who's >lacking intelligence.>> 2. WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM OUR FRIENDS: Police in Oakland CA spent two >hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded himself inside his >home. After firing ten tear gas canisters, officers discovered that the man > was standing beside them in the police line

shouting, "Please come out >and give yourself up!">> 3. WHAT WAS PLAN B??? An Illinois man, pretending to have a gun, >kidnapped a motorist and forced him to drive to two different automated >teller machines, wherein the kidnapper proceeded to withdraw money from >his own bank accounts.>> 4. THE GETAWAY! A man walked into a Topeka KS Kwik Stop and asked for >all the money in the cash drawer. Apparently the take was too small, so he >tied up the store clerk and worked the counter himself for three hours >until police showed up and grabbed him.>> 5. DID I SAY THAT??? Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery >suspect who just couldn't control himself during a lineup. When detectives >asked each man in the lineup to repeat the words: "Give me all your money >or I'll shoot," the

man shouted, "That's not what I said!">> 6. ARE WE COMMUNICATING??? A man spoke frantically into the phone: "My >wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart." "Is >this her first child?" the doctor asked. "No!" the man shouted, "This is >her husband!">> 7. NOT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED! In Mode! sto CA, >King was arrested for trying to hold up a Bank of America branch without a >weapon. King used a thumb and a finger to simulate a gun. Unfortunately, >he failed to keep his hand in his pocket. (Hellooooooo!)>> 8. THE GRAND! FINALE! !! Last summer down on Lake Isabella, located in >the high desert an hour east of Bakersfield CA, some folks new to boating >were having a problem. No matter how hard they tried, they couldn't get >their brand new 22

foot boat going. It was very sluggish in almost every >maneuver no matter how much power they applied. After about an hour of >trying to make it go, they putted into a nearby marina, thinking someone >there may be able to tell them what was wrong. A thorough topsi de che ck >revealed everything in perfect working condition. The engine ran fine, the >out-drive went up and down, and the propeller was the correct size and >pitch. So one of the marina guys jumped in the water to check underneath. >He came up choking on water, he was laughing so hard.> (NOW REMEMBER...THIS IS TRUE.)> Under the boat, still strapped securely in place... was the trailer!>_________________________________________________________________Express yourself instantly with MSN Messenger! Download today - it's FREE! http://messenger.msn.click-url.com/go/onm00200471ave/direct/01/