How do you know for sure?

[Guest guest]

Our son has been diagnosed but I sometimes look at the lists and

wonder if this is a correct finding. I have read that aspergers

presents in a number of ways and that my early intervention may have

helped him get past some problem areas.

For one he has excellent gross motor skills (my daughter is the

complete opposite!) and he is able to make eye contact with more

people - he actually says, " Mom I looked at them in the eyes " - I

have never said anything specifically and wonder if he has always

understood his inability and is trying or something like that (He is

7 1/2 right now but we keep him with a peer group one year younger).

He hasn't always but now is starting to play with kids. The success

is very dependent on the kids and what they are doing. He is

obsessed with hockey and this is usually what he wants to do but he

will play hide and seek and sometimes a game of cards with myself or

his sister.

He has to win - part is that I think he is naturally competitive but

there seems to be this light that goes off - if he is running and

trying to win you can see that he is really struggling with the fact

that someone might get there first. I have seen him try to stop the

child not realizing they could be hurt. I have also seen him hit a

child who has won or get verbally angry.

He seems to do well in a very structured environment but he also

needs flexability at the same time.

He will obsess about something - ie: if we are going on a trip he

has a hard time just waiting he has to talk about it non stop =

asking questions about what we are doing, seeing, what the room will

be like etc... I am sure this is getting ready mentally but it

seems more than just that - but I am not sure.

HE doesn't understand authority well - he knows that adults are

usually authority figures but he often puts himself on the same

level as them (or me) saying he doesn't have to do this or that and

not in the typical kid sort of way - very matter-of-fact like.

He shows some signs of empathy but lately I am not sure completely.

Recently I have watched him hit his sister - she was upset and he

just sat there - didn't care. When I brought it to his attention he

apologized but you could tell he was detached from the feeling

part. The other day I saw him on a swing with another child and his

swing hit the child. The child started to cry and ran to his

mother - he just kept on swinging and didn't respond until I told

him to go and see if the boy was ok.

We use social stories and I did after these two instances but I

think the stories fell on deaf ears.

I am sure I sound like I am all over the place but I am concerned

for my son and what he is feeling and how he relates to the kids

around him. It won't be long before the kids see his as " different "

and if he keeps acting this way I am sure some will make it

difficult for him.

Does my son sound aspergerish? Or does it sounds like something

else?

Helen