Re: Question on Respite workers

[Guest guest]

Hi Rose,

With regards to respite workers I have a couple of view points: I,

myself, was recently hired by an agency to do respite care for other

children. The reason I went in this direction was it became obvious

that there is a huge gap for children needing aides when I came to

need services for my own kids. I also have some experience listening

to others who provide respite because prior to having my own

children, I had the pleasure of getting to know a family that are

wonderful respite care-givers.

I guess I would say get to know the person as an individual - it

takes a bit of time, of course - and base your opinions on how to

proceed with them (in a friendly manner or in a more professional

way) after you have a good 'feel' for who they are and the impact

they make in your child's (and family's) life.

I would personally tend to remain a bit more guarded and remain on

the professional side at first because, after-all, it is a service

that is being provided to you which that person is being paid for.

That said, cetainly I have got to know some lovely people who I

learned to like and respect outside of their field and I would

consider them friends who I trust my children with. You will get to

know some people will go beyond their 'duty' and embrace your child

and do special things for them (and your family) that they need not

to, but choose to anyway.

In a pinch, I know a few people that they would take care of my

child without expectation of payment simply because they care for

that child first and foremost. However, I would never take advantage

of that in a relationship (some parents get 'too comfortable' and

forget that this is the respite worker's livelihood!) Always be sure

to demonstrate your appreciation both verbally and through

renumeration.

I have also had the misfortune to have an aide come into my child's

life and while my child became very attached to them, it became

obvious that this was not so true of the worker. Unfortunately, the

aide's ultimate concern was strictly monetary: As soon as I

mentioned a possiblity that the rate of pay I was able to offer

might be reduced - a very insignificant amount (long story, but due

to the contract we have for service providers) the person dropped my

child immediately. It broke my child's heart (ouch!)

You will KNOW the difference! Trust your instincts.

Have a great day!

Velvet

>

> Hello everyone,

> I wanted to ask, for those, who have a " respite worker " for your

> child. Would you,

> treat the respite worker like another family member/friend type

> relationship, because that person is working very close with your

> child, spends time with your child, and is with your child long

term.

> and you can get to know/trust that person, so when they are out

> together, you are more comfortable? -OR-

> Is it best to decide, that's their job and keep it " all

> work " " Professional " , and explain what needs to be done and keep

the

> respite worker separate from any family type stuff? and just find

out

> from the service coordinator, anything you need to know about the

> worker?

> We are getting a new respite worker soon and I would like to know

how

> you worked that out? thank you

>

[Guest guest]

Hi, no actual respite experience in my family, but just some comments

since I do know about it from work experience (hearsay I guess).

I think that I would just take it day by day. Certainly you can ask

them about themselves, share anything you feel about your family (of

course you'll tell them all about your child). I'm trying to say you

don't have to keep it all business or just like a family member. Just

be friendly. I assume they might be a bit cautious or more

professional at first too, unless you just get a naturally friendly,

outgoing type personality in the worker.

I know of many workers who became like family members (and not just

respite workers but other type services). Went on trips with them

even. One worker actually went with her " person " to his prom, where he

danced with others and had a great time (saw the pictures). Some have

even pitched in, unpaid, in a pinch for the families.

Of course sometimes personalities just don't click, a worker just

doesn't do their job, etc. You'll find that in any work environment

though. But you'll have the choice of finding someone else if things

don't work out with the worker.

So good luck and keep us updated on it!