Re: girl ways for AS boys?

[Guest guest]

All? No. But many many many. I have someone very close to me in my

life who has been through this, and we've gone to conferences and such

together, and the story is repeated over and over, just like our

stories about our children here.

Meira

>

> Seems like it would not be possible to speak as if they all had this

same exact problem.

[Guest guest]

I am the one who was the original poster of this discussion.

I was just wondering if AS boys tended to have more girl ways than " normal. "

My ex is having a hard time understanding Jake's love of stuffed animals.

Jake is 7, there fore he " should " be more into boy things...so says the ex.

My take on this is, AS kids are just emotionally immature, tending to

gravitate towards the younger kids and toys and such.

This truth really hit me yesterday. Jake went to daycare with his 4 year

old sister, Jake is on Spring break. He wanted to go and I was SOOOOOO

happy...I mean this is a new unfamiliar situation and he wanted to go!

I told them at the daycare that if he seems to be out of place or lost, to

just take him to his sister and he'll be okay. They are very close. Well, he

ended up staying in her class and playing with all the 4-5 year old

girls...that is his mentality. They played outside a lot as it was a pretty

day and

the director told me that Jake played with all the little girls..they thought

it was so sweet.

So in thinking of this, I don't think it's " gay " ways, I think it's just an

immaturity and there is a safeness also being with younger children. Also

Jake loves the girls! LOL! If she has blonde hair, watch out, he's in love!

LOL!

This has really been an interesting discussion, I have really enjoyed

everybody's experiences.

Tracey Shockey _MYspace_

(http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile & friendid=13263\

4800)

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[Guest guest]

I have read recently these posts about boys who play with girl's toys, have

feminine mannerisms, etc. My 7 yr. old son with Asperger's is the same way,

except since he has done it for a couple of years, he doesn't play with girl

toys now as he understands that if he does that, he will be made of in society,

and that is just a fact.And maybe someday the world will be perfect and that

won't happen, but we are very much into trying to save him pain now.

I do not believe that since he was born a male that there is anything wrong

with our trying to help him to be a male. In fact it is encouraged. I don't

believe it is inhumane or anything politically incorrect like that. It may save

him a bit of heartache down the road and we are really into that.I don't think

that a man who does a load of laundry or cooks dinner is effeminate, in fact I

would love it if that would happen around here! But I really like the male of

the human species.I love how different men and women are.I do not care to see

little boys in pink dresses and playing with dolls and that is why we, my

husband and I have, have discouraged this.In fact we are doing phone consults

with a therapist at a clinic in California to try and help our son. He has

provided us with a lot of helpful information.

I believe I see a trend in the Asperger's community around this issue, though

I read somewhere that the rate of homosexuality is no higher in the autism

community than in the general population. I have an extensive education in the

medical field. And, we are madly in love with our kid and would only do what is

best for him.If, in the future, this problem doesn't resolve itself, we will

deal with it then, with God's help. I would like to think that we can talk

about whatever we have on our minds in this online community, whenever we want,

until a MODERATOR advises otherwise. And really, how can you talk about gender

identity issues without talking about homosexuality!!??! Can't. I think it

should be possible to talk about the whole topic as a problem because, if we

are truthful, it is for some people or they wouldn't even pause when they see

their kid playing with dolls when they think he should be playing with

trucks.Some people WANT sons! And that is okay!

Really it is! So, for the people who think it is wonderful that someday all

the trappings of masculinity should disappear, let alone procreation, this

one's for you!!!!!!!!

---------------------------------

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[Guest guest]

I think the whole reason this homosexuality subject came up was that a mom was

wondering if her child with aspergers may be homosexual.

Re: ( ) " girl " ways for AS boys?

> >

> >

> > I've been debating on whether to weigh in on this topic or not,

> and finally decided that I

> > really ought to. Our son with AS has always had a preference

> for 'girly' toys too. Plus, he

> > kind of has that set of stereotypical 'gay mannerisms.' When he

> was 9yo a child

> > psychiatrist suggested that we prepare ourselves for the 'fact'

> that Ian might be gay. At

> > the time, I thought the doctor was nuts to be saying that about

> such a young child. I've

> > always kept it in mind though.

> >

> > This year Ian's caseworker at school brought up a " touchy "

topic.

> He has a son who *is*

> > gay, who recently came out of the closet. He says it was no

> surprise to him and his wife.

> > They had suspected as much since their son was a preschooler.

The

> reason he wanted to

> > talk to me about it is that he says our son seems very much

like

> their son. (Our son has

> > also been writing a lot of stories where boys turn into girls

> lately, and continues to have an

> > interest in typically girl-related things.) I told him that he

> isn't the first professional to

> > suggest the possibility--that we believe being gay is something

> you're born with and have

> > been handling the possibility by providing an environment that

> isn't hostile to gays, but

> > instead recognizes their contributions to society.

> >

> > On the other side of the coin, our son's current psychiatrist

and

> therapist both say our son

> > seems 'asexual' to them. Our take on things is that it's simply

> too soon to tell where our

> > son will fall on the gender spectrum. The most important thing

is

> that he grows up to be

> > comfortable with himself.

> >

> > ly, I'm hoping he's *not* gay, because who wants their

child

> to have to live in a

> > society where ignorant people might beat them to a pulp? And

> because he has enough

> > differences to deal with already. But there's nothing about

> having AS that precludes the

> > possibility. A certain percentage of kids *are* gay, and the

best

> thing we can do for them

> > is accept that--and them.

> >

> > That said, there's nothing unusual about a young boy being

> interested in dolls or shiny,

> > glittery, girly toys. I don't think you 'catch' being gay from

> Barbie dolls though. <g>

> >

> > Sue C.

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> > ----------------------------------------------------------

--

> ----------

> >

> >

> > No virus found in this incoming message.

> > Checked by AVG Free Edition.

> > Version: 7.5.446 / Virus Database: 268.18.18/734 - Release

Date:

> 3/26/2007 2:31 PM

> >

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

My thoughts EXACTLY!

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[Guest guest]

This email makes me so furious I could scream, but instead of ranting

for pages like I want to, I'm going to keep it simple.

It's not a question of whether or not YOU want a son, or YOU want

your son playing with trucks. It's a question of accepting your

child as GOD made him. Too many gay and transgendered teenagers kill

themselves because their parents don't accept them. If my son wants

dolls and pink dresses, then so be it. I'd rather he be a girl than

dead.

Meira

>

> I have read recently these posts about boys who play with girl's

toys, have feminine mannerisms, etc. My 7 yr. old son with

Asperger's is the same way, except since he has done it for a couple

of years, he doesn't play with girl toys now as he understands that

if he does that, he will be made of in society, and that is just a

fact.And maybe someday the world will be perfect and that won't

happen, but we are very much into trying to save him pain now.

> I do not believe that since he was born a male that there is

anything wrong with our trying to help him to be a male. In fact it

is encouraged. I don't believe it is inhumane or anything

politically incorrect like that. It may save him a bit of heartache

down the road and we are really into that.I don't think that a man

who does a load of laundry or cooks dinner is effeminate, in fact I

would love it if that would happen around here! But I really like

the male of the human species.I love how different men and women

are.I do not care to see little boys in pink dresses and playing

with dolls and that is why we, my husband and I have, have

discouraged this.In fact we are doing phone consults with a

therapist at a clinic in California to try and help our son. He has

provided us with a lot of helpful information.

> I believe I see a trend in the Asperger's community around this

issue, though I read somewhere that the rate of homosexuality is no

higher in the autism community than in the general population. I

have an extensive education in the medical field. And, we are madly

in love with our kid and would only do what is best for him.If, in

the future, this problem doesn't resolve itself, we will deal with

it then, with God's help. I would like to think that we can talk

about whatever we have on our minds in this online community,

whenever we want, until a MODERATOR advises otherwise. And really,

how can you talk about gender identity issues without talking about

homosexuality!!??! Can't. I think it should be possible to talk

about the whole topic as a problem because, if we are truthful, it

is for some people or they wouldn't even pause when they see their

kid playing with dolls when they think he should be playing with

trucks.Some people WANT sons! And that is okay!

> Really it is! So, for the people who think it is wonderful that

someday all the trappings of masculinity should disappear, let alone

procreation, this one's for you!!!!!!!!

>

>

>

> ---------------------------------

> It's here! Your new message!

> Get new email alerts with the free Toolbar.

>

>

[Guest guest]

Girls are usually much more predictable in their play. Boys tend to be

agressive and more unstructured and unpredictable. My son always gravitates

towards the girls, but is starting to interact with boys more. Pam

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