Henry to

[Guest guest]

Dear Chrissy,

I am so sorry that you had a rough first day back at work. I guess MUSC

never really slows down completely. On the times that I have been

hospitalized there during the holidays it always semed pretty steady to me,

but that is only from a patient's point of view so I don't truly know for

sure. It sounds like you made the best out of a bad situation anyway. I felt

your pain as you described when you gasped in pain. It hurts me to hear of

your suffering as I know the feeling of trying to hide your pain in the work

environment. I was at work one night back around 1991, in a great deal of

pain, and trying not to let it show and my manager came up and said, " why

are you in low gear on?! Get it in gear @%$%!! " Well, the next time

I saw him that night he caught me in the men's room throwing up in the

stall. He was much nicer then, and said something about why didn't I tell

him I was sick, that he thought something was wrong, and he was just kidding

me earlier. I really believe that people who haven't experienced that type

of pain can't comprehend what all we pancreas patients go through. I was

trying to cover up and didn't want to lose my job over this problem.

They were actually quite nice about my illness even though they didn't

really understand what was wrong. I ended up having to resign that position,

but felt O.K. about my overall treatment in the workplace. Someone told me

that they couldn't fire you legally over an illness per se, but they could

make you want to quit and that wasn't the case.

Anyhow, sorry to ramble on so. Like you said about Demerol making you

" dumb, " which you aren't, narcotics make me ramble. I wish that medical

science research would find a way to make narcotics that don't affect your

cognitive function, or that make you feel weird. That's what I don't like

about taking them. It's crazy to me that some people actually get off on

feeling that weird, floaty, feeling 'cause I don't like that part of pain

meds. I just want the pain relief part. Also, like you stated in an earlier

post from the legal perspective, it's a darn, sickening shame that some of

these drug seekers make it so we are viewed with suspicion for a real

medical need. Nuts! Once when I was on 10-W, I had a nurse who got busted

for skimming off of her patient's narcotics and replacing them with saline.

She was arrested and they even put her picture on T.V. Oh well.

Well, I hope that you are soon feeling better, and can really enjoy your

work. I know you said that you love what you do and that's a blessing. I

hope that somehow we can read your article. I admire you for going back to

school to make it in a new profession. That's inspirational! :-)

Oh! did you ever read my second post about the " Pancreatitis Partners "

group, what it was, and why it folded? If not, then log onto the MUSC public

information site and look under " Pancreatits " or mabe it's " Pancreatitis

Partners. " There is a reprint from the last " P.P. " newsletter which is

titled, " Support Group Fades Away, " I think it is and it explains some of

it? But I hope that my post made it to you. I've been having that not

posting problem we conversed about.

Have a restful weekend and see you back here whenever. O.K.?

Your Pancreas Pal,

Henry