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For and Barbara

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Dear Barbara,

Your comments are, as always, full of wisdom. Getting older, for me,

brings more of a sense of fatalism, of being at the mercy, of--well,

life. Having a genetic disease will do this to one, won't it?

The secret to life is to live with grace. Emotional, intellectual,

physical and spiritual grace are some of the kinds of grace. Few can

sustain all throughout a full lifetime. In the end, all that is left is

spiritual grace. The others frequently dissipate over time, 'tho slowly.

I think it takes more courage and grace for the younger amongst us to

wage battle with the mito dragon.

I remember in my 20's, having so many weeks in the hospital after

multiple knee surgeries, that I stopped being able to watch the Pepsi

commercials on TV. They were full of beautiful young people, in their

20's like me, cavorting and singing, on beautiful beaches. I could

scarcely walk across the room, with a big cast and a walker. I had years

of pain, and worked full time as a HS English teacher, play producer,

newspaper, etc. Later on, some of my beloved kids told me that they used

to have bets (among the boys) on how long it would take me to get across

the street.

It's not " wrong " to feel very disheartened at times. In fact, it would

be abnormal not to be.

Good luck with your gamma knife surgery, Barbara, and good luck to you,

, as you bravely try to evaluate all of your options.

Take care.

S.

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