Re: problem with spouse--For Sharing With Family Members

[Guest guest]

Hello all.

Yes, I find it somewhat difficult to explain why sometimes I can eat

something and other times not.

Being type 2, and not injectin insulin, my choice is based primarily

on my blood sugar level and what I have already eaten or plan to eat.

This is like having a limited amount of money and having to decide

where to spend it. It is my right to decide I prefer going to the

cinema rather than buying a book, or viceversa. Few people would not

ackowledge that right. The same happens with a diabetic eating carbs,

sweets, etc. I have a (rather small) amount I can eat, and I have the

right to decide when, what, and if I will eat. That is difficult

enough in itself, and yet you have to add the difficulty of how to

make your choices in such a diplomatic way not to step on anyone's

toes. Ah, life is not just. ;-)

I have no problem telling people I'm diabetic. BTW, though I use

interchangeably the phrases " I'm diabetic " and " I have diabetes " , I

lean more towards the latter. See, strictly speaking, I'm not

diabetic, I'm . And I, , have diabetes. My identification

card (provided by an association of diabetics in Argentina)

reads " Tengo diabetes " ( = I have diabetes), not " Soy diabético " ( =

I am diabetic), as many cards read. Yet the association is

named " Diabéticos.Org " . OK, I admit it, we are not easy to understand.

Though I have no problem telling others about my diabetes, I still

feel uncomfortable when it is my loving wife who says " He is

diabetic " in front of me (for example, if someone offers me a candy

and I simply say " No, thanks " ). I have told her too many times that I

can say that for myself whenever I want, but she first says the

phrase and then remembers I don't like her doing that. Ah, women, so

lovely and yet so incomprehensible.

Anyway, I don't make too much of a fuss either, since I know she says

that with her best intention, because she cares for me and wants to

protect me as much as she can.

Regards,

P.S.: I loved the phrase " the Food Police " . I would have never dreamt

of such an accurate way of describing some people. I will tell my

mates of the lists in Spanish about " la Policía de la Comida " .

> >[re: a piece of carrot cake] . . . It was worth the extra shot!!

>

> Absolutely! but that's one of the reasons I am selective about whom

I tell

> about my T1/diabetic status . . . *I* choose if/when/how much I

will bend

> the " rules " and how I will compensate. Diabetes, in its various

forms and

> ways of treating it, is difficult enough for us to learn to

understand but

> normal folks really get confused and find it nearly impossible to

> understand as they tend to see it as black-and-white, all or

nothing,

> always or never . . . and that can turn them (no matter how well-

meaning)

> into the Food Police.

[Guest guest]

> I still

> feel uncomfortable when it is my loving wife who says " He is

> diabetic " in front of me (for example, if someone offers me a candy

> and I simply say " No, thanks " ).

>

My mother does this whenever we are out, when the waiter asks about desert

instead of a simple , " no thanks " , she says " oh we have diabetes " . Im sure its

that Im still thin skinned over this, but I want to jump under the table and

hide!

[Guest guest]

Ah, yes. It can be a little uncomfortable at times when my husband

pipes up with my condition to a waitress. I used to say it all the

time, figuring I had to explain my eating habits to the waitress for

some reason. But I've stopped doing that.

Recently we were eating out and I asked the waitress about how the

tea was sweetened. When her answer wasn't very helpful, I was just

going to order something else, rather than " pull out the big guns. "

My husband however jumped in with " she's diabetic " which kicked the

waitress into another gear. She rushed off to find out if there was

sugar in the tea, and was most helpful and solicitous thru the rest

of the meal. It was exhausting! ;-j

When she'd left the table, I made light of it to my husband, saying

something about not wanting to hit her with a nuclear strike (and

joking that now I couldn't get away with ordering desert!). We

chatted about how it had brought much more attention than we had

wanted for our quiet meal. It really is " bringing out the big

guns, " and he hasn't volunteered the info to a waitress since. ;- j

Amused,

Ellen

>

> In a message dated 7/30/04 12:04:02 PM, cotarelogarcia@y... writes:

>

>

> > I still

> > feel uncomfortable when it is my loving wife who says " He is

> > diabetic " in front of me (for example, if someone offers me a

candy

> > and I simply say " No, thanks " ).

> >

>

> My mother does this whenever we are out, when the waiter asks

about desert

> instead of a simple , " no thanks " , she says " oh we have diabetes " .

Im sure its

> that Im still thin skinned over this, but I want to jump under the

table and

> hide!

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Waiting tables is a difficult job; explaining that I'm diabetic lets the server

know that I'm not asking about the ingredients or asking for substitutions just

to be difficult or because I'm indulging in what C.S. called 'the gluttony

of delicacy', but that I have a substantive reason for asking.

[alldiabeticinternational] Re: problem with spouse--For Sharing With

Family Members

Ah, yes. It can be a little uncomfortable at times when my husband

pipes up with my condition to a waitress. I used to say it all the

time, figuring I had to explain my eating habits to the waitress for

some reason. But I've stopped doing that.

[Guest guest]

> if I were a little boy who has been offered a candy,

> and she were the mother jumping in with " No, he has not had lunch

> yet. "

>

Sorry to jump off subject, but I know people are trying to be nice but Im so

tired of everyone offering my son candy, the barber, the feed store etc.. i

really try to avoid candy with him

[Guest guest]

> Lest I be misunderstood, I think one should not offer candies to

> little boys, and their parents are perfectly entitled to jump in and

> politely declining the offer in the name of their child's best

> interest.

>

OH but people give the strangest looks when I do! I decline candy with my son

(george) because first of all at 2 years old he is too young to know Im

turning it down, and too my husbands family is prone to dental problems and type

2

diabetes, I have type one and my family is a mix of type two and type one.

Also I just am crazy enough that I dont think children need candy! I would much

rather give him a sticker or small toy than candy.

[Guest guest]

> Another trick my Spanglish played on me.

>

>

Your spanglish beats my english anyday, i didnt even notice!

[Guest guest]

That's precisely the reason why I often tell people that I'm

diabetic. What I don't like very much is my wife telling that in

front of me, as if I were a little boy who has been offered a candy,

and she were the mother jumping in with " No, he has not had lunch

yet. "

As I have said, it isn't a terrible thing either. We are not going to

divorce over this issue. ;-)

Regards,

> Waiting tables is a difficult job; explaining that I'm diabetic

lets the server know that I'm not asking about the ingredients or

asking for substitutions just to be difficult or because I'm

indulging in what C.S. called 'the gluttony of delicacy', but

that I have a substantive reason for asking.

>

[Guest guest]

Lest I be misunderstood, I think one should not offer candies to

little boys, and their parents are perfectly entitled to jump in and

politely declining the offer in the name of their child's best

interest.

This, however, should not be done to an adult. If someone offers me a

kilogram of honey and I want to eat it, it is my problem. And if I

want to decline the offer, I can do that for myself.

Once again, this has become something rather funny between my wife

and I - I really don't give this such a great importance. It even

amuses me how she first says " He's diabetic " and then looks at me as

if asking forgiveness. Or when she first tells me " Can I tell him? "

and, almost without waiting for my answer, which she knows would be

affirmative, she says " He's diabetic " .

Regards,

> Sorry to jump off subject, but I know people are trying to be nice

but Im so

> tired of everyone offering my son candy, the barber, the feed store

etc.. i

> really try to avoid candy with him

[Guest guest]

Sorry, that should have been " ... to little children... "

Another trick my Spanglish played on me.

> Lest I be misunderstood, I think one should not offer candies to

> little boys [...]

[Guest guest]

lol, if your posting represents your spanglish, then spanglish away, I have

enjoyed your postings and can detect a lovely sense of humor...

Carmen

[alldiabeticinternational] Re: problem with spouse--For Sharing

With Family Members

> Sorry, that should have been " ... to little children... "

>

> Another trick my Spanglish played on me.

>

>

>

>

> > Lest I be misunderstood, I think one should not offer candies to

> > little boys [...]

>

>

>

>

>

> pancreatitis info

> http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/ThePancreatitisPlace/

>

> diabetic recipes

> http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/diabetic_recipes/

>