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Re: strength - Elaine

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Thanks Elaine - I so much appreciate your kind words. I think your thought on

" doing things for you " is a wise one. I do find that I'm at my lowest ebb

emotionally when not busy - with either work OR " play " . -

In a message dated 9/15/2005 12:39:50 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time,

helpbpdmom@... writes:

yet I can feel your pain and sadness even trhough the peace. I know this

feeling and I know it is good, be strong, have a happy day and do things for you

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I can empathize with you in this Birthday issue. This past May was the

first time I ignored my daughter's birthday. But she was busy that very day

getting a restraining order against me. Because she says I had hubby put back

in

jail, I was on the __it list and she tried to keep me away from the boys

with the restraing order. I guess that was her Birthday present to her.

Her mother in law, however remembered her Birthday and guess what is

happening there now, You got it, now the mother in law is on the __it list.

She

does not let her see the baby and doesn't speak to her neither does my

daughter's hubby (the son). Guess he knows where his bread is buttered. After

all

his mother probably would ot support him as does my daughter.

You did the right thing, I am sure she noticed. Give her a taste of her

own medicine. As I have said before they cannot go around treating people

lousy and then expect us to give a damn about them. Natural consequences of

their

behavior. You reap what you sow.

Jean

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(Non)

I know how you feel about all this, but I have reached the point of

detachment and never thought I would. I look at my daughter and I feel nothing

for

her. It is like lookung at a stranger now. That is not to say that perhaps

if I could trust her and she started treating me like a mother again, that my

feelings for her might return. But be it a protective mehanism or whatever,

right now, I feel like she is a stranger.

I used to see her every day and she would call me numerous times a day, so i

wnet thru my withdrawal phase and I keep myself not only occupied but I love

all this time I have for ME now. Having her attached my hip was in all

honesty a real drag.

You will reach this point as well. I think of myself as having my family

consist of my son and my two grandsons. That's it. I don't feel guilty about

it, just a little surprised that I have reached this point. This was her

choice, so I hope she is happy with her life as it is now, because I am.

Jean

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