Guest guest Posted June 5, 2006 Report Share Posted June 5, 2006 Try this place: SLS Health Dept. 279, 2503 Carmel Ave. Brewster, NY 10509 888 8 ca re4u Alfred Bergman http://www.slshealth.com/ Our daughter went there when she turned 18, from an RTC in Alabama where they diagnosed her with BP. However, she decided it was too much work and checked herself out. In any event, I believe this is a great place to turn to! The staff are very good, and it was highly recommended by all the other people working with our daughter. Let us know how it goes! Helen _____ From: WTOParentsOfBPs [mailto:WTOParentsOfBPs ] On Behalf Of salthehit81 Sent: Sunday, June 04, 2006 7:11 PM To: WTOParentsOfBPs Subject: Constant Pressure I have a 19 year old son who is totally out of control. We have been under constant pressure from him since he was 17yrs old when he first tried to commit suicide. He is very hard to live with, everything turns into screaming match and he is always right. He has alernated himself from all is friends and he feels that people are always against him. Everything that he seems to touch always goes wrong and he feels that he is the worls is coming down on him. He tried to commit suicde again this past May and he has been home since. He is under medication and all he does is sit in his room. When we confront him about doings things he blows up and end up in a fight. Well today we had a big fight because I lost my patience and told him to get to work. He wound up hitting me three times in the back of the head. Iam at wits end because he doesn't want to recoginize that has a problem. All he does is feel sorry for himself. My wife and I are tired frustrated and feel lost. We feel like complete failures Does anybody know of a good doctor who is familar with BPD in the lower Westchester NY area. Problems? Ask our friendly List Manager for help, @.... SEND HER ANY POSTS THAT CONCERN YOU; DO NOT RESPOND ONLINE. Essential reading to help you feel better and understand the BP in your life are: .. SWOE ( " Stop Walking on Eggshells " ) and the SWOE Workbook (for everyone) .. HOPE FOR PARENTS Call 888-35-SHELL () to order your copies. From Randi Kreger, Owner of BPDCentral and the WTO Online Community Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 5, 2006 Report Share Posted June 5, 2006 In a message dated 6/4/2006 9:51:17 PM Eastern Standard Time, salthehit81@... writes: Well today we had a big fight because I lost my patience and told him to get to work. He wound up hitting me three times in the back of the head. Iam at wits end because he doesn't want to recoginize that has a problem. All he does is feel sorry for himself. My wife and I are tired frustrated and feel lost. We feel like complete failures Does anybody know of a good doctor who is familar with BPD in the lower Westchester NY area. Hi there and welcome! You have come to the right place. Well, 19 you say? Pick up the phone, dial 911. This is the best course of action when he is raging, and especially raising his hand and hitting you! My goodness, hitting? If my daughter ever..........well, she didn't. He needs extreme intervention here, call 911 and let the officers know he needs to be taken to the ER and have crisis intervention step in and get him evaluated. Is your son covered under your health insurance? They will need to be contacted while you are there, possibly for referral to an inpatient facility. You need to take charge, take control and let him know you mean business. You will not tolerate his behavior in your home, and if he can't abide by the rules and face the consequences of his actions, then he cannot remain in your home. This is not mean so don't feel you must feel bad by taking action. This will help him. As long as he is allowed to remain in your home and faces no consequences for his actions, he will not stop his bad behavior. I have a daughter, now 19 and is recovered and well. She suffered for five years, from 13-18. She graduated last year, and just this past week, moved into her own apt. w/her b/f. I have her back and she is fine. Will be attending the local college here in the fall. I am in NJ and there are 6-7 facilities here, all useless to us. There was a place in W. Orange we went to that seemed promising, but that didn't pan out. He needs to be evaluated and possibly placed. But you also have to go through the mental health dept. of your health insur. carrier as long as he is covered on your plan. Otherwise, he will be responsible for all his medical bills. I hope this help, write more if you like, any questions you have too I will try and answer. I does get better, there is hope, so hang in there. Know that you are not alone, too in dealing with this. We are a terrific support group here. hugs, DebbieL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 5, 2006 Report Share Posted June 5, 2006 What a wonderful response you gave to the gentleman with " constant pressure " from his son. It made me think back to the years with K when she was in college and used to abuse me and my home. If only I had heard those words from you then. I would have saved myself many years of guilt and handled her so differently. Jean Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 5, 2006 Report Share Posted June 5, 2006 Salthehit81: It is much harder for you as a father to deal with this illness than for us.. as mothers.. I say this because men teach their sons strength, so you are dealing with two sources of guilt... first...and foremost... you feel bad because you can't " fix his problem and stop the misery " and you may feel you failed to teach him to be strong. You didn't fail. If you had failed him... he wouldn't have come home to you. I don't have a referral doctor for your area. Try your own doctor or the hospital's psychiatry department or your insurance company. But please call 911 immediately when your son swings into the agitated depression again. Tell them he is Bipolar, out of control, and has been violent with you. Don't wait. You can't expect to reason with him.. His biochemistry makes that impossible. During the agitated depressive statee.. he is doing what all our kids have done..choosing someone in thier life to demonize..to pin their rage on. It's usually a parent...you are his demon. He is doing what is " normal " at that stage of illness. His body's chemistry is commanding him to " fight or take flight " ! Don't expect him to be rational and understand he's sick...We don't even understand this yet. But you are not the cause of his anger or his illness. If you or I were injected with the same chemical make up he's got...we'd be violent too! He's not going to Grow Out Of It..the swings in personality and irrational behavior he will require medication for the rest of his life. It's a biochemical disability. But the Right Combinations of Medications and ongoing counseling will allow him to hold down a job, keep a relationship and make you very proud of him. Keep us informed.. You're a hero! Constant Pressure I have a 19 year old son who is totally out of control. We have been under constant pressure from him since he was 17yrs old when he first tried to commit suicide. He is very hard to live with, everything turns into screaming match and he is always right. He has alernated himself from all is friends and he feels that people are always against him. Everything that he seems to touch always goes wrong and he feels that he is the worls is coming down on him. He tried to commit suicde again this past May and he has been home since. He is under medication and all he does is sit in his room. When we confront him about doings things he blows up and end up in a fight. Well today we had a big fight because I lost my patience and told him to get to work. He wound up hitting me three times in the back of the head. Iam at wits end because he doesn't want to recoginize that has a problem. All he does is feel sorry for himself. My wife and I are tired frustrated and feel lost. We feel like complete failures Does anybody know of a good doctor who is familar with BPD in the lower Westchester NY area. Problems? Ask our friendly List Manager for help, @.... SEND HER ANY POSTS THAT CONCERN YOU; DO NOT RESPOND ONLINE. Essential reading to help you feel better and understand the BP in your life are: SWOE ( " Stop Walking on Eggshells) and the SWOE Workbook (for everyone) HOPE FOR PARENTS Call 888-35-SHELL () to order your copies. From Randi Kreger, Owner of BPDCentral and the WTO Online Community Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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