Ticket to Work

[Guest guest]

Didn't mean to belittle the concept of working -- having to accomplish this

through the government-designated programs with the " incentive " of foregoing

medical review is what I object to. The implication that they use medical review

as a punishment is what I object to...

I DO work -- a little. I still operate my design business, but on such a

small scale -- well, it's far below the minimum at which I'd have to report any

of

it to anybody -- and half of it's charity work to begin with. There's still

the matter of my composing, which I consider work (I was once a salaried

composer, it's legit for me to call it work) and even that's too much at least

once

a week. I have training to do any of a long, long list of jobs -- and not

enough good time to maintain a normal household.

And I frankly dislike being made to feel more inadequate -- no one wanted to

hire me permanently BEFORE I became disabled, I didn't go freelance as a

lark...I doubt it's changed and I really doubt I'll hear from anyone, but more

than

anything I'd love to be able to do what I used to. Play piano and keyboards,

have the energy to direct, haul equipment, act without falling into walls, any

of it. ANY OF IT. If anybody wanted me, they'd call -- I haven't moved for 15

years, I can't begin to figure out HOW to move -- ticket to work? Washing up

to go out in public can be too much work, I've hurt myself washing my

hair...arg. I've got to stop, I'm typing without my thumbs unsuccessfully, and

it's

not easy.

I'm really, really not against work. I'm just against living the internal

struggle about being disabled, over and over. My shoulders fall out of place

under the weight of my arms, I can't hold a pencil at the moment, and they still

force me into this territory...