My session with massage therapist (Lana)-LONG

[Guest guest]

Ok, I wasn't going to post this for the general list, but I feel I

have to after all the questions/answers that's been going on between

Mike and others on the list. The reason I wasn't going to post it,

is because I think it's a PERSONAL choice, and this was MINE. I also

feel you absolutely HAVE to BELIEVE in whatever type of

therapy/treatment you are getting, or it absolutely will not work. So

as you read this, please remember that like all things, religion, the

belief in God or a higher power of some sort, angels, etc. is also a

PERSONAL choice/decision, and everyone's is different. Personally, I

have a very deep faith in God and angels, along with psychic powers

and the like. Do they conflict? Not in MY world and beliefs. They

naturally go together in MY world. I wrote this last night, and

privately, to Mike, for the above reasons; but as I said before, I

feel I need to share it now. I will NEVER, EVER judge anyone on

thislist for their personal beliefs - that is NOT in MY world! So I

ask you to read this with an OPEN MIND, and do not judge me, in

return. In posting this, I hope you can all feel the LOVE and TRUST I

haveforall of you! How do I feel now? Better than before I went to

Better,not as good as I hope and expect. I still have some pain in

my shoulders, and a little in my lower back and neck, but it has

lessened drastically. Betty told me that I would NOT feel great in

only one session, but believes it will take four or so to get to

really feeling good. So here now, is the post, and keep in mind that

I was writing privately to Mike. Btw, I would trust Mike with my

life, he's done that much for me.

Massage Therapy by Betty tonight

Hi Mike,

First of all, I want to ask you something. Did you somehow connect

with Betty at all before I went? I really want to know. I'm writing

you offlist, and then I'll copy some of it and post it, but I needed

to send this to you privately first. I have a feeling you `felt'

something before I went, yes?? No?

Anyway, I didn't really know what to expect about HER, as a person.

I LOVE HER! Did you base any of your recommendation on her on my

energy at all?? Just curious. When you said you had a feeling I

would really get along well with her, well, Mike, I have to say that

was a HUGE UNDERSTATEMENT! Also, before I go any further, when we

left, I asked Mike what he thought of her, and he said he didn't she

was off base at all, really. She said a couple

things to me that he's thought before, and has talked to me about.

So he fully supports this, and me going to her.

I wish with all my heart, that I could remember everything she said

to me, and I CAN'T! That's so disappointing to me, in trying to

explain to my parents and kids what this was like, as well as to you;

but then I think you'll know what I'm talking about. When I got

there, she said something to me, I can't remember the statement, but

it was right on, and I asked her how she knew that! She said, " Well,

I connected with you before you got here,for one thing, and the other

is that I just asked God. " I said Oh, OK. I'm thinking, " Oh God,

she's phychic too! " Great! :-) She's a very personable

lady. We went into her room, and she said, " I assume that since your

husband is in here, that I can say anything to you, and you can say

anything to me, correct? " I said that was right.

She then proceeded to tell me that I'm a deeply religious person and

I pray a LOT! She said I'm very emotional, and deeply connected to

those I love. I give them a lot. Then she asked how much of my

energy I give to my husband each day. I said probably at least 50%,

if you count thinking of him during the day, calling him, etc. Then

she asked if I had kids, and how much I give them. I said, " Is this

all supposed to equal 100%???? " She smiled, and said that was what

she's getting at. She asked if I have a dog and how much I give him,

how much I give my parents, etc. She said that I'm giving all my

energy away to all these people, and that leaves me with what?

I said, " Nothing? " She said, " You got it! That's one of the things

we're going to work on today. I want you to know, that this is all

about YOU, and NO ONE ELSE. We will also work on your spirituality,

and getting you more in touch with God, because you definitely

believe in him. (at this point, my eyes began to tear up a little,

but I got it under control) At times, I will be touching you, to

feel and sense your energy. If at any time, you are uncomfortable,

or in pain, speak up right away, OK? Now, tell me what's going on. "

I told her about your letter, and she said she would read it later, if

that's OK, and I said that was fine. I told her I have EDS and

explained what that was, with a little input from Mike. I told her

briefly, my medical history of EDS, Fibro, IBS, Degenerative Disk

Disease, Osteoporosis, Arthritis. I then told her where my pain was

located., and told her what kind of medications I take. When I told

her I take a lot of medicine for IBS, she said, " IBS is hold in a lot

of shit! " I giggled, and she said,

" No, I mean IBS and constipation is just that – holding in a lot of

shit – do you get me?? " I said I did. I knew she was talking

emotional shit. Then, she said, " So you have been in pain for most of

your life, right? (I said yes, mostly) She asked if the pain was the

kind that is dully there all the time, or if it was like when my meds

wear off, thinking, Oh, God, I hurt, I need to take my meds. " I told

her it was more like the first kind. She said " stuff like IBS, and

chronic pain are patterns, really. It's become a way of life for

me. " She said, " We're going to work on breaking that pattern, Lana,

and it's not going to be all easy. It's going to be a change for

you, a big one. Right now, you get something from all this in a

way. You get attention, help, sympathy, etc. (I said yes, that I

understood what she meant) and we're going to work on taking that

away from you and breaking the pattern. You've been in pain your

whole life, and this is going to be a huge change. You are a person

that's very emotional, Lana, and you are right on the brink right

now. One of our goals will be to lessen your meds by quite a bit.

How much water do you drink? " (I said not nearly enough) It's very

important that you drink lots of water. How's your diet? " (I told

her it wasn't great since the kids moved out, and that I've slacked

off quite a bit) She said " It's very important that you get better

with your diet. I would like you to try drinking " greens " . The only

way I can explain it, is that it's like looking at grass clippings.

But if you drink it, it will promote general overall health, and

really should help with the IBS. " (She drinks it once a day, and I

told her I'd try it) She said that when we were done, she would like

me to go home, pamper myself, and take a bath, and asked if I'm a

bath person, and I said I definitely was. She said to take a bath in

Epson Salts for at least 20 minutes, and go over what goes on here in

a few minutes. She said Epson Salts can also help with

IBS/constipation. (I thought to myself, " Soaking in Epson Salts can

help constipation?????? Huh! Then I read the box, later, and you

drink a couple tablespoons in water. DUH!)Then she said, " Do you

think you can work with me? " I said I was, and that I was ready. Then

she began.

She had me lay on my back, and told me that she was going to be

touching me and after a bit, she would pause and be quiet. She

said, " What I want you to do then, is try to FEEL the love God is

giving to you. Feel his presence and him wrapping his arms around

you to keep you safe. I may ask you a question, and I don't expect

an answer, it's just something I want you to think about. I want you

to breathe deeply and when you breathe in, breathe in God's love and

feel it making you stronger, making your tendons and ligaments

getting stronger and holding you up better than they ever have in

the past. " She touched my feet and stopped. Then she put her hands

on the under side of my calves and ran them down to my feet. She

then stood and lifted my feet up to about a 90 degree angle, and sat

them down gently. Then she did the same thing to my calves. Then she

sort of lightly stroked the topside of the calves. She would speak a

confirmation statement every so often.

Mike, when she told me I was right on the brink, the flood gates

opened. Then, each time she would say something, it would begin

again, and sometimes when she would stroke me, I would cry harder,

and would find it hard to keep the deep breaths. At that point, she

would say to go the place inside me, where I can feel all of God's

beautiful love for me, and to know that I'm worthy of love, and

worthy of respect, worthy of less pain. I'd shake my head, and the

tears would run in my ears! At one point she asked if I was OK, and I

said " Yes, I'm just feeling a lot of release. " She said she

understood, and that I need to go to my place, and feel the love. She

followed this pattern next to the hips, following the same procedure,

of touching, pausing, then sort of stroking. She may go back and do

it a time or two before she moved on to my rib area. Then she went

to my shoulders and asked if she could touch my sternum. I was so

relaxed and in my " place " , that I could only shake my head. Finally,

she went on to the neck area, running it up to my head. Oh, and

several times, she said to visualize all the toxic stuff just pouring

out my body and down to the floor. After she did my neck and head

several times, she then kind of waved her hands around my head and

shook them. I had to ask Mike what she did, as I could sense

something like that, but didn't really see anything but a shadow. I

don't know if she did that any other times. Maybe once or twice.

She then told me that when I was ready, she wanted me to roll to my

side and sit up. It took me several minutes to even begin thinking

about rolling over! LOL! When I sat up, she said , " I don't think

I've ever had such a powerful session. You worked very, very hard!

In fact, if you don't mind, I'd like to write it up, if you don't

care? " I told her I didn't care. She said that since I worked so

very hard, that she envisioned a fairly short term of therapy, and

that no one had ever worked that hard. I told her I felt

unconditional love and that it was a HUGE release for me! She said

she understood, and asked again if I was OK. I told her I was. She

asked how I wanted to continue. Did I want to call her, or what?

She said she thought that perhaps 4 visits would get me pretty close

to feeling great, and after that, it would be up to me. She said if

I want, I could come in once a month, or maybe when the seasons

change, like 4 times a year, or if I've had a stressful time in my

life, or slipped, or whatever. It's totally up to me. (I had told

her what the chiro had wanted to do and how long, and she

just said NO, it won't happen like that here!) I told her I thought

I would like to call her in a couple days, just to let her know how I

was feeling and schedule the next session. I felt somewhat

lightheaded, but not like fainting or anything. She said that would

be fine, and if I wanted we could work the " light " work over the

phone. That's the God part. She does that for donations, from a

dollar to a million. LOL! She has a great sense of humor! I told

her I would probably schedule for a week, and that I would

like to make a donation, and she said, " Lana, don't go getting crazy

on me here! " and then she smiled, and it was dropped. We looked

around her office, and she told about what was on her walls, the

significance to her, etc. as we had asked about some things on the

walls. Her little boy knocked then and came in, so we got to see

him. She had said earlier, that this does NOT drain her at ALL, that

it actually energizes her, as she gets energy from God. She said, " I

feel so strong and young, that I tell my brothers I can beat them at

anything. I bet you can't even guess how old I am. " I told her I

dreaded to even try after hearing that, and guessed 25. She's 40.

She said her parents began thinking it was all poppycock until

she worked on them a couple times, and now they LOVE it, but her

brothers won't let her work on them at all. That was it!

I feel better than I have in weeks, physically, and mentally and

spiritually, I'm still on a " high " ! I do still have a couple somewhat

sore areas, but nothing like when I went in! I did have 2 big

glasses of water, and took my salts bath, like I promised. It was

wonderful, and in the bath, I began to cry again! It was draining,

but like a cleansing. I don't think I'll post most of this to the

list, as I think you have to experience it to understand it at all.

Oh, I wanted to tell you too, that I did feel warmth several times,

and at one point near the end, felt tingly move from my head to my

feet and then stop. I'm assuming it was mostly zero balancing and

light work, but maybe a little acupressure, but she didn't

ever hold it long enough (I don't THINK) to become balanced? I'm

just not sure, but it was great. I was somewhat surprised that I

cried that much, but I remembered you saying that it can happen. I

just wasn't counting on it – but I felt so connected to her, and it

was like she was reading the INSIDE of my feelings and soul, almost.

Oh, something else I forgot to tell you, is that she knew I didn't

have a uterus. She said it " felt " empty there, and that she thinks I

have issues with that. She asked if I liked my doctor, and I said I

did, and she asked if I trusted him and I said yes, because he was

willing to let me do something like this. I told her I thought he

was frustrated as he doesn't really know how to help me now. She

said most of them don't, they just want to medicate it and have it go

away. I know that's true. She asked if I'd have a cup of coffee with

him and I told her I would. She asked if he was the one that removed

the uterus, and I told her he wasn't. She wanted to know if that

doctor was still around and I said no. The only issue I think I have

about that, is that it was done vaginally, and he didn't realize how

many fibroids there were, so it took like 5-6 hours! My back hurt

TERRIBLY, and I finally asked the nurse why, and she said I had been

in stirrups the whole time. Also, they didn't get me my full pain

killers and would only give me ½ dose, as I had been allergic to

muscle relaxants in HIGH SCHOOL when I had a wry neck. They had

me on 3 different ones, as my neck was " stuck " on my shoulder. I

called the time every half hour, to see if I could get the pain

shot/pill yet. A could times I called the nurse, and she said, " I

told you before, you can't have it, the doctor didn't order it.

You'll have to wait! " Finally, a different nurse came in and gave me

a back rub and talked hypnotically and put me back to sleep. If it

weren't for her, I think I would have died. When the doctor came in

the next morning, I was crying from all the pain, and he wanted to

know what was wrong. When I told him, he was furious they hadn't

called him at home, and wanted a name. I had no idea what her name

was. My back hurt for MONTHS after that! That's the only " issue " I

can think of. I was ready to have it, as we weren't planning on

having more children, and I'd had 2 c-sections and was bleeding most

of the month and sick to death of it. I was around 32 or so I think.

That's all I can think of, Mike. I wish I could remember what she

said to me when I first got there though, that bugs me. I just know

it shocked the hell out of me. Oh, I keep remembering things!!!!

LOL! She also said, before I got up, that she had asked 4 angels to

be with me to protect and help me through all this. ,

Raphael, Ariel and . She said that if I felt like I was

collapsing, or threatened or anything where I needed someone, that

they would be surrounding me. She said, " Lana, also do not be afraid

to call on your own personal angel. I know you believe in them, as

you have two of them on today! So don't be afraid to ask for help,

all you need to do is ASK. "

So, what do you think? I was very impressed. She was very

professional, yet human and down to earth, and very, very loving and

giving – although she said it was God that was doing it all. She's

probably right, if I think about it. I can't thank you enough for

referring her to me, Mike! Well,it's now 12, so I'd better read the

list mail in a HURRY and scoot to bed. All in all, she spent about 1

½ hours with me. Thanks again, so much.

Love Lana

[Guest guest]

As promised, here are some additional comments and observations.

At the very beginning, I will add that my own personal choice a few

days ago to open up to the list with far more detail about what I

have been going through with all this was also a difficult

decision. What Barb told me before I sent it was " It takes guts to

post this in public. You have to do what your heart/soul tell you. "

Like you, I felt that it was something I simply HAD to do, any

potential repercussions and loss of credibility be damned.

My life and belief systems have gone off in directions I never even

imagined possible three years ago. As much as I have posted in

recent months, there is also much that I have not posted. Like I

told my own twin brother a few days ago (when I finally shared those

two really long posts with him), if I had not personally lived

through all of this, I wouldn't believe the soap opera my life has

become either.

As painful as it has been at times, I have learned a lot on my

personal journey, not all of it just manual treatment techniques.

One of the things has been more of an understanding by just what is

meant in the bodywork field when it is grouped as Body-Mind-Spirit.

There is much that I am still struggling to accept. In just the

last couple of weeks I have been forced to come to terms with either

my rapidly becoming delusional or that there is some other reality

out there that I have done a pretty good job of rejecting for a lot

of years. I am still trying to pound all the pieces into the

scientific cubbyhole and not all of them want to fit. I have far too

much time, money and effort invested in this by now to just simply

turn my back on it and walk away. So I guess I have to keep

seeking, taking classes, and looking for answers.

The whole subject of psychic connections, spirit guides, angels and

religion in general is such a deeply personal area that I have

deliberately avoided mention of any of it. On the one hand, some on

the list will have religious convictions which will give them

problems with the whole concept. Others will reject it all out of

hand because they (like me) want to put everything under a

microscope. The entire scale of belief is represented by this

list. It is not for me, or any one else, to judge another person's

beliefs.

One thing that taking the variety of classes that I have taken has

clearly shown me is that there is no ONE, my way is the only way, or

even the best way, approach to any of this. Far too often I have

taken a class in one modality and basically gotten hit with that

attitude, only to take a different class later in something else and

get hit with the same thing. The only problem is that they are

often doing similar, if not exactly the same, things but are calling

it by different names. And as critical as I sometimes get about the

conventional side of the house, I sometimes need to remind myself

that we are all a product of our backgrounds. Doctors do what they

do because that is how they were trained. They do what they do

because they have enormous amounts of time and money invested in

becoming doctors, along with equally enormous debts that they have

to pay off. The don't pay off their debt by telling their patients

to go someplace else.

It has also shown me that we are more than just an accumulation of

tissue and physical body parts. I have seen first hand how mental,

spiritual and energetic dysfunctions and blockages can cause

physical dysfunctions. And I have also seen first hand how it is

sometimes necessary that those non-physical issues be addressed and

resolved before there is any chance of a physical improvement.

And given all of that, there are things that happen sometimes when

receiving bodywork that most definitely go well beyond just physical

manipulation of muscles and bones. The more deeply seated the

issues, the more difficult the resolution can be at times. You just

went through this.

You also were confronted with an issue I have deliberately not

brought up in the past. Pulling no punches, sometimes people don't

get well because subconsciously they don't want to get well. This

can be for a number of reasons. It can be, like in my case, that

confronting the underlying issue means facing something you don't

want to face. Or, like was implied to you yesterday, the rewards

(attention, sympathy, whatever) of not getting well outweigh the

benefits. But that is where the Mind-Spirit pieces come in. I am

not throwing stones at anybody with this. I have been as guilty, if

not more so, than anybody else.

As for more specifics on your first session, I do not doubt for one

minute that Betty was able to pick up or sense things before you got

there or just in conversation with you. I have seen the same many

times with other highly trained practitioners the last couple of

years. Explain it? Well, that it is just another part of those

things I am still coming to grips with. I accept the reality. I

just haven't been able to come up with good scientific reasons or

answers yet. I have, however, finally been able to stop rejecting

the idea out of hand and just move on.

Her comments about IBS and constipation being more of a " holding

pattern " pattern rather than pure physical is typical of what you

can expect from practitioners of Traditional Chinese, Ayurvedic, and

Naturopathic medicine. It is a recognition that mental and

spiritual issues roll down hill and mess up the physical body.

Treatment might include things like the Greens to jump start the

healing process, but a true cure has to resolve the underlying

issues. And that is something that the traditional, conventional,

western approach cannot do by itself. The real problem is that the

conventional western approach is symptom driven, not cause driven.

has already separately given you some excellent advice for

your after action hit by a truck syndrome. The whole point of the

Epsom Salts bath and consumption of LOTS of water is that they work

to flush the toxins that are released at the cellular level out of

your body. Any time you have bodywork done, even a relaxation

massage, it is critical that you drink plenty of water afterwards.

The " talking you through " things is called dialoging. It is the

same kind of thing that is done with psychologists and

psychiatrists. It goes by different names depending on the bodywork

modality but most if not all of the alternative modalities at higher

levels train for it. The main problem I personally have with some

of it is the importance of the practitioner/therapist staying within

their boundaries, scope of practice, and level of skill. It is one

thing to assist someone with visualization and being present with

them if they are having an emotional release (which you most

certainly were). It is something else entirely to then start

interpreting and giving advice beyond their scope of practice and/or

training.

I don't know for sure, but I suspect what she was doing when she was

waving her hands around your head and shaking her hands was shaking

off an energetic build-up from working with you and also regrounding

and centering herself. It is also possible that she might have been

doing an energetic balancing on you. I frequently do something

similar as a finish to a session. I will do a full system Chakra

balance (off-body with my hands six inches to a foot away from the

person) and will end it by ruffling their energy field.

Let's see – she recommended maybe four treatment sessions after the

first? When was the last time you went to a health care provider

and got that kind of attitude – as opposed to you will be doing ---

(fill in the blanks) for the rest of your life?

Knowing you didn't have a uterus without being told? Doesn't

surprise me at all. I am not to that level yet, although I expect

to be by the end of the year. The internal organs also have their

own energy fields. With training and practice, you can develop the

ability to sense them. I will get my first real exposure to this

next month. I have signed up for both levels one and two of

Visceral Manipulation (one in April and two in May). The reasons

she was asking you the questions she did was to see if you had any

lingering resentments that might be manifesting somewhere else as

part of your overall problems.

Don't feel bad about not remembering everything. Trust me, you will

continue " to process " that first session for the next few days and

will keep remembering different pieces of it from time to time. I

am still processing my last couple of major release episodes. It

takes time and it is part of the healing process.

And to wrap this one up, what do I think? It doesn't matter what I

think. What matters is what you think. Sounds to me like you got

your money's worth. I am just glad I was able to locate her for

you.

[Guest guest]

Thank you, Mike, I so appreciate your insight and comments! Now to mull

YOURS over as well! :-)

Love Lana

[Guest guest]

Thank you, Mike, I so appreciate your insight and comments! Now to mull

YOURS over as well! :-)

Love Lana

[Guest guest]

Thank you, Mike, I so appreciate your insight and comments! Now to mull

YOURS over as well! :-)

Love Lana