My child may have cancer

[Guest guest]

This is very hard for me to write and to even think about. THe last two weeks

have gotten worse and worse and there is still more to come. My Sara, who

justed turned 20, has always had excruseating periods. I have writtenn that to

the list before. She finally went to gyn in her college town. It was her first

pelvic which I know was hard. Well, until last week, I had no idea but her pap

came back as abnormal. I just happened to find out when we were talking online

and she was talking about needing some extra money and I was inquiring why.

When she mentioned a doctor's appt. I asked who and when she said that she was

going back to the gyn again, I asked her why so soon. Then she tells me about

the pap smear.Well, I get all upset that this hard headed, independent but

stressed out EDSer of a kid of mine didn't even tell me but I'm trying to stay

cool about that and the abnormal results. Then she is scheduled to come back for

a colposcopy or something like that. That was yesterday. She promised me she

would call. She didn't . She didn't answer my calls. This morning I finally

reach her and she tells me, as she is crying , that the doctor took 4 biopsies,

that she would know in a week but that it appeared to be cancerous. If so,

she would go to the hospital for surgery annd that should take care of it!!

Well, I wanted ssooooooooo badly to talk to this doctor(who wasn't the one who

did

the pelvic exam) but Sara didn't want me " bothering her wiht lots of

questions. I was about to just fall apart,,, and did actually later!. I tried to

get

across to her that there are many stages to go through before it actually being

malignant, and requiring a hysterectomy. It was awful! I got her to come home

tonight after her last class for the weekend, alonng with her boyfriend, She

has said that she wished that she had never told anyone. I cannot tell you how

hurt that made me. I want to be there for her and to help and to find out

what is going on and I can't!! I told her that that is what love is and what

family's do.

She's 20, though and parents have NO rights!! I talked with a friend who is a

doc who said it would be very unusal at her age annd all the other things it

could be and blah blah blah. He offered to talk to the gyn but I know Sara

would refuge. I am tempted to get Bob, our friend just to call her annd talk to

her. I am so sorry that I am just rambling at 2 am but I had to tell you all.

Bob also said that it is odd that they wouldn't rush it and get the results

in 48 houurs instead of makinng her wait so long. He said that lots of it

sounded wierd to him. She will hear next week and I won't be there for her. I

have

to some how , gently, try again to talk to her about it. She has always been

independent but this is redicuouus. This child has been through so much in she

short life. It just wants to make me cry.....more!

I am due to go to NIH Monday for two days for the new EDS protocol. If the

timing is as they said, she won't have heard by then. Maybe then I will go to

onburg and campout. She didn't even tell her big sis who goes to college

there too.

We have been through alot in this fammily. It's our second cancer scare with

the kds. This onne may not have as happy a ending. Sara has really gotten the

sucky part of life!! I wish so much I could take it all away from her....or

even onne thing,,,, her severe asthma, her EDS, her life threatening allergies,

pain , something. I realize that there are others far worse but please God

help us here.

sorry to have rambled so. Thank you for listening. I'll be trying to figure

out how do you help a child who feels that she needs none? Maybe just give it

to her anyway. When she told me about the pap test coming back abnormal and

when I wanted to speak with the doctor( she didnn't even know this one's name)

she told mme that I had my hands in too many things already. Does my child hate

me!