RE: Small NSV (and a thank you)

December 16, 2004

WOW ! That was great will power! You deserve a super Bravo for

that! I don't think I would have been as strong.

Blessings,

Regina Bassett

205/149/150

Small NSV (and a thank you)

A small one, and I feel kind of weird about it.

I've mentioned before on this list that my wife has pretty much given up

on losing weight. She still works out regularly at Curves, and her

eating

habits are mostly okay, but it's still hard for me to insist on having

something healthy for dinner when she's in the mood for, say, pizza.

So. We went to a potluck dinner at our church last night, and my wife

had

made a vegetarian lasagna (made with whole wheat noodles, because that's

what I bought when she asked me to buy noodles) and sugar cookies -- not

just any sugar cookies, but big, thick, honkin' sugar cookies, the kind

that weigh about eight pounds each and could probably serve as an entire

meal in themselves. After dinner -- salad and the vegetarian lasagna

and

bread rolls -- the adults and children sat around and used thick

egg-based

colored frosting to paint these cookies. Of course, most everyone

gorged

on the cookies as they were being painted; the first part of my NSV was

that I refrained from eating any of the cookies at all.

The second part was this morning. My wife had set out breakfast for us:

four of these really thick cookies for each of us, along with a

container

of chocolate frosting. I admit that I was really tempted, but in the

end

I thanked her, then apologized as I put my cookies back in the tin and

went into the kitchen to get myself a vegetarian bratwurst (from Boca, 3

points) and a banana to replace the cookies. My wife ate her cookies

with

chocolate frosting. The rest of the cookies have been taken to our

different offices, so they won't be around the house anymore.

I don't believe for a moment that my wife is trying to sabotage my

weight

loss efforts. Rather, I think that because she doesn't take her own

weight loss very seriously and because she really likes these cookies,

she

probably just figured she'd share a yummy treat with me for breakfast.

She didn't seem heartbroken that I chose not to have the cookies with

her.

That's why I feel kind of weird about this.

And " Thanks " to everyone who responded to my earlier post entitled

" *Sigh*

the struggle continues " . I really appreciate the support and kind

thoughts. Tory, your comments in particular really made me feel better.

Right now, I'm working on doing this one step at a time, concentrating

on

eating Core foods, counting points when I need to, but mostly just

trying

to stay focused on single days as they come and go. I find that, right

now, it's easier to say, " I won't eat bad foods today " rather than " I

won't eat any bad foods at all this week " . Let tomorrow worry about

tomorrow.

Thanks again, all.

--

Sláinte,

S. Crawford (AIM: Buffalo2K)

http://www.mossroot.com http://www.stonegoose.com/catseyeview

" We live as though the world were how it should be,

to show it what it can be. "

-- " Angel " , Season 4 ep. 1

December 16, 2004

Good for you, . And I think you are quite the optimist.

Its hard to believe or even think that a loved one may be sabotaging our

efforts however, I think if you really look at what is happening, you will

see that it is happening to you: your wife is trying to sabotage your

healthy outlook. Take heart. It is very hard to turn down the " goodies "

she sets out for you, but you have shown that you care about yourself and

that your goal is more important than the whim of a treat. You are also

setting an example, if you are handling it carefully. By just telling her

" no thanks " you are not attacking, but instead letting her know that you

aren't interested. And that sounds like what you did.

It could be that this interchange will eventually sink in for her, that she

will follow your example. It could also be (more likely) that she will

continue down this road until her demons are faced. It doesn't matter

because your goal is important to you. And because it is your goal, you can

control how you reach it. You cannot control how others behave toward your

goal. So, again, , good for you for keeping the mantra of " I won't

eat any bad foods today. " Whatever works for you and helps you reach your

goal.

good luck!

Small NSV (and a thank you)

A small one, and I feel kind of weird about it.

I've mentioned before on this list that my wife has pretty much given up

on losing weight. She still works out regularly at Curves, and her eating

habits are mostly okay, but it's still hard for me to insist on having

something healthy for dinner when she's in the mood for, say, pizza.

So. We went to a potluck dinner at our church last night, and my wife had

made a vegetarian lasagna (made with whole wheat noodles, because that's

what I bought when she asked me to buy noodles) and sugar cookies -- not

just any sugar cookies, but big, thick, honkin' sugar cookies, the kind

that weigh about eight pounds each and could probably serve as an entire

meal in themselves. After dinner -- salad and the vegetarian lasagna and

bread rolls -- the adults and children sat around and used thick egg-based

colored frosting to paint these cookies. Of course, most everyone gorged

on the cookies as they were being painted; the first part of my NSV was

that I refrained from eating any of the cookies at all.

The second part was this morning. My wife had set out breakfast for us:

four of these really thick cookies for each of us, along with a container

of chocolate frosting. I admit that I was really tempted, but in the end

I thanked her, then apologized as I put my cookies back in the tin and

went into the kitchen to get myself a vegetarian bratwurst (from Boca, 3

points) and a banana to replace the cookies. My wife ate her cookies with

chocolate frosting. The rest of the cookies have been taken to our

different offices, so they won't be around the house anymore.

I don't believe for a moment that my wife is trying to sabotage my weight

loss efforts. Rather, I think that because she doesn't take her own

weight loss very seriously and because she really likes these cookies, she

probably just figured she'd share a yummy treat with me for breakfast.

She didn't seem heartbroken that I chose not to have the cookies with her.

That's why I feel kind of weird about this.

And " Thanks " to everyone who responded to my earlier post entitled " *Sigh*

the struggle continues " . I really appreciate the support and kind

thoughts. Tory, your comments in particular really made me feel better.

Right now, I'm working on doing this one step at a time, concentrating on

eating Core foods, counting points when I need to, but mostly just trying

to stay focused on single days as they come and go. I find that, right

now, it's easier to say, " I won't eat bad foods today " rather than " I

won't eat any bad foods at all this week " . Let tomorrow worry about

tomorrow.

Thanks again, all.

--

Sláinte,

S. Crawford (AIM: Buffalo2K)

http://www.mossroot.com http://www.stonegoose.com/catseyeview

" We live as though the world were how it should be,

to show it what it can be. "

-- " Angel " , Season 4 ep. 1

December 16, 2004

, in no way is that a SMALL NSV, that's a HUGE one!

I agree, your wife very probably isn't trying to sabotage you, I have a husband

who is naturally thin, very wiry and LOVES sweets. I mean LOVES them. He has to

have cookies in his lunch and something to nibble on at night. Worse, he often

eats dinner around 8:00pm whereas dd and I eat around 5:00 . . . right at prime

snacking time.

He couldn't care less one way or another about my weight, nor is he in any way

trying to sabotage me, he just likes things the way he likes them even though he

knows it's very hard for me with the sweets.

Two things I learned help me a LOT. The first is, I make a batch of cookie dough

and only bake one pan at a time. The rest gets put away in the fridge until I

need to make another couple dozen cookies. I have our chocolate chip cookie

recipe <his favorite> entered into the recipe builder, lightened up a bit and

because he likes tiny cookies <so they fit into his rubbermade lunch box> I know

exactly how many I can eat. And since I like them fresh out of the oven, I get

to eat a few cookies <I'm a volume eater> for minimal points and I always get

fresh cookies every couple days.

The second is, I do what Tory does. I have a low point sweet snack. So while

he's eating dinner and we're chatting or watching tv etc. I have my snack. Later

on when he's ready to read quietly <and eat candy or popsicles etc> I head off

to bed. I'm reading quietly with the pillows the way I like them and he's out

here getting some quiet time in the best chair in the house reading quietly etc

.. . . this way we both get what we want.

It doesn't always work, as evidenced by the fact that I've been at this for

three years and I'm still bouncing around and not at goal, but I'm a slow

learner and have had more issues to deal with than most.

This wandered a bit, and wasn't necessarily on topic with your TERRIFIC NSV!!

<><><><><> but it may help someone else in a similar situation. It's hard when

spouses are in different places on something this personal, I mean can you GET

more personal than food?? But, NOT ALL SPOUSE ARE SABOTAGERS. And that's

something people need to realize.

________________________________________________________________________

Message: 24

Date: Thu, 16 Dec 2004 12:23:14 -0800 (PST)

From: " S. Crawford "

>

Subject: Small NSV (and a thank you)