Guest guest Posted June 20, 2004 Report Share Posted June 20, 2004 Hi , First of all, you are NOT alone in this journey!!!! There are thousands of people all over the world doing the exact same thing, this is the WW family. Technically, yes, we are all alone since no one is sitting with us 24/7/365 and monitoring what we eat, drink, and our exercise. I understand wanting a buddy to go to meetings, etc but I am not sure that this was a good relationship from the beginning. A WW friend should not make it a competition! Everyone loses at their own pace and that is the way it is supposed to be. They should be there to support no matter what the scale says!! You and you alone can and will decide that you are going to make the lifestyle changes necessary to lose the weight and get healthy. We are here to support, encourage, and offer any advice we can, but we can not do it for you. Have faith in the program and know that when we work it, it really does work and we can make goal! YOU CAN DO IT!! Maureen My friend is quitting WW Hello everyone! I started Weight Watchers with a friend of mine. She is probably going to quit - and I guess I knew from the beginning that she probably would. I thought it was a great idea to join with her. We could go to meetings together, we could support eachother...etc..etc...I guess I had this notion of the way we would do this together...but the reality wasn't so great. She had a breast reduction a couple months ago (cancer related) and had 8 pounds of breast tissue removed. Of course, when she weighed in, she made a big deal out of losing 9 lbs that week. She would make a point to tell me every week how much more she had lost than I did and how she was " beating " me....I never said anything to her about it, but every time she'd celebrate a success after that, I'd be thinking, " Well, yeah, you lost 15 lbs so far, but 8 of it was your boobs. " (now you know what kind of thoughts run through my head...hope that isn't totally shocking) Anyway...every week felt like a competition and it never felt supportive in any way. So anyway...we'd both been on a plateau for about 4 weeks and about two weeks ago, I decided, " that's it! I'm going for this. I'm getting serious! " and I'm losing again. (and SO glad I found this list!) She is still on a plateau (even gained a bit) and she gets really negative if I lose and she doesn't. I really think she's going to quit (everything is pointing to it) and I have mixed emotions about it. On the one hand, I'll almost be relieved. To have that competitive feeling be gone each time I weigh in...having her ask me how much I lost....but then on the other hand, can I do this alone? I'm worried that I can't. Or won't. But ultimately I think I have to. Even with meetings and a supportive email group like you gals (and guys if there are any out there!) ultimately, don't we all have to make these daily eating and exercising decisions alone? in CO Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 20, 2004 Report Share Posted June 20, 2004 " This is all wasted time " ?? Wow. ly I'm stunned that on a Weight Watchers support group someone would be bothered by people sharing their 1-lb. losses....or our gains or our maintains or our 50-lb losses or whatever we're experiencing as we work through this weight-loss program. For some people, a 1-lb loss is a huge accomplishment following weeks of struggling with a plateau. For some of us that 1 pound is the last portion of our journey to cross the goal line. For some of us 1 pound represents weeks of effort for whatever reason. I for one am grateful to the list owner and moderators that here we are free to share our 1-lb losses (or whatevers)... and that here we receive hugs and cheers and words of love and encouragement along with the exhortation and nudges to get back on program when we occasionally stray. Yay SWW!! Bette in CA 278/187/175 (and proud of every single 1-lb loss!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 20, 2004 Report Share Posted June 20, 2004 I would like to suggest then that everyone stop posting everytime they lose a pound or so. Sharon My friend is quitting WW Hello everyone! I started Weight Watchers with a friend of mine. She is probably going to quit - and I guess I knew from the beginning that she probably would. I thought it was a great idea to join with her. We could go to meetings together, we could support eachother...etc..etc...I guess I had this notion of the way we would do this together...but the reality wasn't so great. She had a breast reduction a couple months ago (cancer related) and had 8 pounds of breast tissue removed. Of course, when she weighed in, she made a big deal out of losing 9 lbs that week. She would make a point to tell me every week how much more she had lost than I did and how she was " beating " me....I never said anything to her about it, but every time she'd celebrate a success after that, I'd be thinking, " Well, yeah, you lost 15 lbs so far, but 8 of it was your boobs. " (now you know what kind of thoughts run through my head...hope that isn't totally shocking) Anyway...every week felt like a competition and it never felt supportive in any way. So anyway...we'd both been on a plateau for about 4 weeks and about two weeks ago, I decided, " that's it! I'm going for this. I'm getting serious! " and I'm losing again. (and SO glad I found this list!) She is still on a plateau (even gained a bit) and she gets really negative if I lose and she doesn't. I really think she's going to quit (everything is pointing to it) and I have mixed emotions about it. On the one hand, I'll almost be relieved. To have that competitive feeling be gone each time I weigh in...having her ask me how much I lost....but then on the other hand, can I do this alone? I'm worried that I can't. Or won't. But ultimately I think I have to. Even with meetings and a supportive email group like you gals (and guys if there are any out there!) ultimately, don't we all have to make these daily eating and exercising decisions alone? in CO Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 20, 2004 Report Share Posted June 20, 2004 I find everytime someone gets on here raving about their running statistics or 5K's or how many pounds they have lost, etc. very competitive. We are not all runners, wo do not all lose at the same rate, etc. and I get tired of opening posts that says 'I lost a pound', open another post that says 'That's great', yada, yada, yada. This is all wasted time to me and I am very seriously thinking about dropping the group as there doesn't seem to be anyone talking about the problems a person with a weight problem has or how to overcome it, etc. Don't mean this negative; just stating some posts I get real tired of. If we lose, that is great, but can't we share it with our family or close friends. Sharon My friend is quitting WW Hello everyone! I started Weight Watchers with a friend of mine. She is probably going to quit - and I guess I knew from the beginning that she probably would. I thought it was a great idea to join with her. We could go to meetings together, we could support eachother...etc..etc...I guess I had this notion of the way we would do this together...but the reality wasn't so great. She had a breast reduction a couple months ago (cancer related) and had 8 pounds of breast tissue removed. Of course, when she weighed in, she made a big deal out of losing 9 lbs that week. She would make a point to tell me every week how much more she had lost than I did and how she was " beating " me....I never said anything to her about it, but every time she'd celebrate a success after that, I'd be thinking, " Well, yeah, you lost 15 lbs so far, but 8 of it was your boobs. " (now you know what kind of thoughts run through my head...hope that isn't totally shocking) Anyway...every week felt like a competition and it never felt supportive in any way. So anyway...we'd both been on a plateau for about 4 weeks and about two weeks ago, I decided, " that's it! I'm going for this. I'm getting serious! " and I'm losing again. (and SO glad I found this list!) She is still on a plateau (even gained a bit) and she gets really negative if I lose and she doesn't. I really think she's going to quit (everything is pointing to it) and I have mixed emotions about it. On the one hand, I'll almost be relieved. To have that competitive feeling be gone each time I weigh in...having her ask me how much I lost....but then on the other hand, can I do this alone? I'm worried that I can't. Or won't. But ultimately I think I have to. Even with meetings and a supportive email group like you gals (and guys if there are any out there!) ultimately, don't we all have to make these daily eating and exercising decisions alone? in CO Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 20, 2004 Report Share Posted June 20, 2004 The last time I checked, this group was for support and friendship. Whether you lost one pound, 100 pounds, ran the Boston Marathon or can't walk 2 feet without having to stop and catch your breath (and I don't mean that as a put down to anyone who might have that issue). Some people don't have the support of family and friends. I'm on several lists, so I don't know which one it was on. But someone had posted that they had gone to a family reunion and lost like 20 pounds (they still had a lot to go). When they shared their loss, they were treated like they were " rubbing it in " and didn't receive any support, encouragement or kudos. There was another time that someone had posted that everytime they would lose and share, they were offered food (cakes, pies), instead of being encouraged in their loss. So they stopped sharing with their family. There are 1190 people listed as members on this list. As a very rough guesstimate, I would say maybe 20-30 of us post pretty regularly. With a lurker or two coming out every so often. All 30 of us are at various stages of our loss/maintenace. Some of us didn't have health problems, some of us did. I didn't have health issues when I first started, even though I was 241 pounds. I know folks who weighed the same, a bit more or a bit less who had a ton of health problems. Perhaps the reason it's not discussed, is because they're not experiencing it or perhaps are too embarrased to share. It also could be that it has nothing to do with their weight. If you're experiencing these issues, start posting about them. Then we can support you or give you ideas. I know there have been times (not necessarily here but on other lists) that folks have posted, but no one responded, because no one had that issue. For the most part, folks put in their subject line, if it's about a weigh in or what have ya. Sometimes they get to talking about something else and then at the end they might add their weigh in results. More often than not, a subject line will take a totally different turn and it never gets changed (i.e. someone posts about their weigh in and bring up another subject) and then folks start commenting on that other subject and it never gets changed to the new subject or even if it does, folks sometimes still comment on the new subject under the old thread name. But I do know that all the posts aren't about how much we lost on a weekly basis or the 5K we ran this week or our training. There have been posts on NSVs, how certain foods can help other health areas, questions on food choices, etc. If you don't want to read about something, then delete it. I do it all the time. If I see a subject that I don't particularly have interest in, I delete it. I've been on a lot of lists over the years and not one has all talk all the time about health issues related to weight. 99% of it is about losses, gains, total losses, NSVs, plans, things we want to try out, etc. Very rarely did particular health issues related to weight come up and when they did, perhaps only one or two people responded. Most of the time, it was to say " not having that issue/never did, can't help " . Once in a blue moon someone would respond saying they experienced it or knew someone who did. If there's something you'd like to see discussed, bring it up and see what happens. If anyone can help, I'm sure they will. This is all wasted time to me and I am very seriously thinking about dropping the group as there doesn't seem to be anyone talking about the problems a person with a weight problem has or how to overcome it, etc. Don't mean this negative; just stating some posts I get real tired of. If we lose, that is great, but can't we share it with our family or close friends. Sharon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 21, 2004 Report Share Posted June 21, 2004 Thanks Becca. I was hoping that I wasn't coming off as rude or inconsiderate, just wanted to add my two cents. You had great points as well. > I think that was very well said Gymmie. I would like to add a few thoughts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 21, 2004 Report Share Posted June 21, 2004 I can understand being competitive about some things, but weight loss is way too individual. I'm sorry your friend isn't doing too well w/ WW, but I'm glad you're doing even better now. =) 175/157.8/130 My friend is quitting WW > Hello everyone! > > I started Weight Watchers with a friend of mine. She is probably going > to quit - and I guess I knew from the beginning that she probably > would. > I thought it was a great idea to join with her. We could go to > meetingstogether, we could support eachother...etc..etc...I guess > I had this > notion of the way we would do this together...but the reality > wasn't so > great. > > She had a breast reduction a couple months ago (cancer related) > and had > 8 pounds of breast tissue removed. Of course, when she weighed in, she > made a big deal out of losing 9 lbs that week. She would make a > point to > tell me every week how much more she had lost than I did and how > she was > " beating " me....I never said anything to her about it, but every time > she'd celebrate a success after that, I'd be thinking, " Well, > yeah, you > lost 15 lbs so far, but 8 of it was your boobs. " > > (now you know what kind of thoughts run through my head...hope that > isn't totally shocking) > > Anyway...every week felt like a competition and it never felt > supportivein any way. > > So anyway...we'd both been on a plateau for about 4 weeks and > about two > weeks ago, I decided, " that's it! I'm going for this. I'm getting > serious! " and I'm losing again. (and SO glad I found this list!) > She is > still on a plateau (even gained a bit) and she gets really > negative if I > lose and she doesn't. > > I really think she's going to quit (everything is pointing to it) > and I > have mixed emotions about it. On the one hand, I'll almost be > relieved.To have that competitive feeling be gone each time I > weigh in...having > her ask me how much I lost....but then on the other hand, can I do > thisalone? > > I'm worried that I can't. Or won't. But ultimately I think I have to. > Even with meetings and a supportive email group like you gals (and > guysif there are any out there!) ultimately, don't we all have to > make these > daily eating and exercising decisions alone? > > in CO > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 21, 2004 Report Share Posted June 21, 2004 I can understand being competitive about some things, but weight loss is way too individual. I'm sorry your friend isn't doing too well w/ WW, but I'm glad you're doing even better now. =) 175/157.8/130 My friend is quitting WW > Hello everyone! > > I started Weight Watchers with a friend of mine. She is probably going > to quit - and I guess I knew from the beginning that she probably > would. > I thought it was a great idea to join with her. We could go to > meetingstogether, we could support eachother...etc..etc...I guess > I had this > notion of the way we would do this together...but the reality > wasn't so > great. > > She had a breast reduction a couple months ago (cancer related) > and had > 8 pounds of breast tissue removed. Of course, when she weighed in, she > made a big deal out of losing 9 lbs that week. She would make a > point to > tell me every week how much more she had lost than I did and how > she was > " beating " me....I never said anything to her about it, but every time > she'd celebrate a success after that, I'd be thinking, " Well, > yeah, you > lost 15 lbs so far, but 8 of it was your boobs. " > > (now you know what kind of thoughts run through my head...hope that > isn't totally shocking) > > Anyway...every week felt like a competition and it never felt > supportivein any way. > > So anyway...we'd both been on a plateau for about 4 weeks and > about two > weeks ago, I decided, " that's it! I'm going for this. I'm getting > serious! " and I'm losing again. (and SO glad I found this list!) > She is > still on a plateau (even gained a bit) and she gets really > negative if I > lose and she doesn't. > > I really think she's going to quit (everything is pointing to it) > and I > have mixed emotions about it. On the one hand, I'll almost be > relieved.To have that competitive feeling be gone each time I > weigh in...having > her ask me how much I lost....but then on the other hand, can I do > thisalone? > > I'm worried that I can't. Or won't. But ultimately I think I have to. > Even with meetings and a supportive email group like you gals (and > guysif there are any out there!) ultimately, don't we all have to > make these > daily eating and exercising decisions alone? > > in CO > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 21, 2004 Report Share Posted June 21, 2004 I can understand being competitive about some things, but weight loss is way too individual. I'm sorry your friend isn't doing too well w/ WW, but I'm glad you're doing even better now. =) 175/157.8/130 My friend is quitting WW > Hello everyone! > > I started Weight Watchers with a friend of mine. She is probably going > to quit - and I guess I knew from the beginning that she probably > would. > I thought it was a great idea to join with her. We could go to > meetingstogether, we could support eachother...etc..etc...I guess > I had this > notion of the way we would do this together...but the reality > wasn't so > great. > > She had a breast reduction a couple months ago (cancer related) > and had > 8 pounds of breast tissue removed. Of course, when she weighed in, she > made a big deal out of losing 9 lbs that week. She would make a > point to > tell me every week how much more she had lost than I did and how > she was > " beating " me....I never said anything to her about it, but every time > she'd celebrate a success after that, I'd be thinking, " Well, > yeah, you > lost 15 lbs so far, but 8 of it was your boobs. " > > (now you know what kind of thoughts run through my head...hope that > isn't totally shocking) > > Anyway...every week felt like a competition and it never felt > supportivein any way. > > So anyway...we'd both been on a plateau for about 4 weeks and > about two > weeks ago, I decided, " that's it! I'm going for this. I'm getting > serious! " and I'm losing again. (and SO glad I found this list!) > She is > still on a plateau (even gained a bit) and she gets really > negative if I > lose and she doesn't. > > I really think she's going to quit (everything is pointing to it) > and I > have mixed emotions about it. On the one hand, I'll almost be > relieved.To have that competitive feeling be gone each time I > weigh in...having > her ask me how much I lost....but then on the other hand, can I do > thisalone? > > I'm worried that I can't. Or won't. But ultimately I think I have to. > Even with meetings and a supportive email group like you gals (and > guysif there are any out there!) ultimately, don't we all have to > make these > daily eating and exercising decisions alone? > > in CO > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 21, 2004 Report Share Posted June 21, 2004 When you go to Weight Watchers meetings, you have a " celebration " time at the beginning where anyone can say how much they've lost that week or if they had a NSV. This is a really important part of the meeting and a lot of people get excited about telling everyone what they've done and how they've done it. If you don't like reading other member's celebrations, please just delete these messages. 175/157.8/130 My friend is quitting WW > > > Hello everyone! > > I started Weight Watchers with a friend of mine. She is probably > going to quit - and I guess I knew from the beginning that she > probably would. > > I thought it was a great idea to join with her. We could go to > meetings together, we could support eachother...etc..etc...I > guess I had this > notion of the way we would do this together...but the reality > wasn't so > great. > > She had a breast reduction a couple months ago (cancer related) > and had > 8 pounds of breast tissue removed. Of course, when she weighed > in, she > made a big deal out of losing 9 lbs that week. She would make a > point to > tell me every week how much more she had lost than I did and how > she was > " beating " me....I never said anything to her about it, but every > time she'd celebrate a success after that, I'd be thinking, > " Well, yeah, you > lost 15 lbs so far, but 8 of it was your boobs. " > > (now you know what kind of thoughts run through my head...hope that > isn't totally shocking) > > Anyway...every week felt like a competition and it never felt > supportive in any way. > > So anyway...we'd both been on a plateau for about 4 weeks and > about two > weeks ago, I decided, " that's it! I'm going for this. I'm getting > serious! " and I'm losing again. (and SO glad I found this list!) > She is > still on a plateau (even gained a bit) and she gets really > negative if I > lose and she doesn't. > > I really think she's going to quit (everything is pointing to > it) and I > have mixed emotions about it. On the one hand, I'll almost be > relieved. To have that competitive feeling be gone each time I > weigh in...having > her ask me how much I lost....but then on the other hand, can I > do this > alone? > > I'm worried that I can't. Or won't. But ultimately I think I > have to. > Even with meetings and a supportive email group like you gals > (and guys > if there are any out there!) ultimately, don't we all have to > make these > daily eating and exercising decisions alone? > > in CO > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 21, 2004 Report Share Posted June 21, 2004 When you go to Weight Watchers meetings, you have a " celebration " time at the beginning where anyone can say how much they've lost that week or if they had a NSV. This is a really important part of the meeting and a lot of people get excited about telling everyone what they've done and how they've done it. If you don't like reading other member's celebrations, please just delete these messages. 175/157.8/130 My friend is quitting WW > > > Hello everyone! > > I started Weight Watchers with a friend of mine. She is probably > going to quit - and I guess I knew from the beginning that she > probably would. > > I thought it was a great idea to join with her. We could go to > meetings together, we could support eachother...etc..etc...I > guess I had this > notion of the way we would do this together...but the reality > wasn't so > great. > > She had a breast reduction a couple months ago (cancer related) > and had > 8 pounds of breast tissue removed. Of course, when she weighed > in, she > made a big deal out of losing 9 lbs that week. She would make a > point to > tell me every week how much more she had lost than I did and how > she was > " beating " me....I never said anything to her about it, but every > time she'd celebrate a success after that, I'd be thinking, > " Well, yeah, you > lost 15 lbs so far, but 8 of it was your boobs. " > > (now you know what kind of thoughts run through my head...hope that > isn't totally shocking) > > Anyway...every week felt like a competition and it never felt > supportive in any way. > > So anyway...we'd both been on a plateau for about 4 weeks and > about two > weeks ago, I decided, " that's it! I'm going for this. I'm getting > serious! " and I'm losing again. (and SO glad I found this list!) > She is > still on a plateau (even gained a bit) and she gets really > negative if I > lose and she doesn't. > > I really think she's going to quit (everything is pointing to > it) and I > have mixed emotions about it. On the one hand, I'll almost be > relieved. To have that competitive feeling be gone each time I > weigh in...having > her ask me how much I lost....but then on the other hand, can I > do this > alone? > > I'm worried that I can't. Or won't. But ultimately I think I > have to. > Even with meetings and a supportive email group like you gals > (and guys > if there are any out there!) ultimately, don't we all have to > make these > daily eating and exercising decisions alone? > > in CO > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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