Guest guest Posted April 13, 2004 Report Share Posted April 13, 2004 Cute Doctor Stories > > > > > > True Doctor Stories > > A man comes into the ER and yells, > " My wife's going to > have her baby in the > cab! " I grabbed my stuff, > rushed out to the cab, > lifted the lady's --Dress, > and began to take off her > underwear. Suddenly I > noticed that there were > several cabs, and I was > in the wrong one. > > --Dr. Mark Mac, San , TX > > At the beginning of my shift > I placed a stethoscope on > an elderly and > slightly deaf female patient's > anterior chest wall. > Big breaths, " I > instructed. Yes, they used to be, " > remorsefully > replied the patient. > > --Dr. Byrnes, Seattle, WA > > > One day I had to be the bearer > of bad news when I told > a wife that her > husband had died of a massive > myocardial infarct. Not > more than five minutes > later, I heard her reporting > to the rest of the family > that he had died of a > " massive internal fart. " > > --Dr. Steinberg, Manitoba, Canada > > > > I was performing a complete physical, > including the > visual acuity test. I > placed the patient twenty > feet from the chart and > began, " Cover your right > eye with your hand. " He read > the 20/20 line perfectly. > Now your left. " > Again, a flawless read. Now both, " > I requested. There > was silence. He > couldn't even read the > large E on the top line. I > turned and discovered that > he had done exactly what > I had asked; he was standing > there with both his > eyes covered. I was laughing > too hard to finish the exam. > > --Dr. Theodropolous, Worcester, MA > > During a patient's two week > follow-up appointment with > his cardiologist, he > informed me, his doctor, > that he was having trouble > with one of his > medications. Which one? " > I asked. The patch. The nurse > told me to put on a > new one every six hours and > now I'm running out of > places to put it! " I had > him quickly undress and > discovered what I hoped I > wouldn't see. Yes, the man > had over fifty patches on his body! Now the > instructions include removal of > the old patch before applying a new one. > > --Dr. St. Clair, Norfolk, VA > > > While acquainting myself with > a new elderly patient, I > asked, " How long have > you been bed-ridden? " > After a look of complete > confusion she answered ... > Why, not for about twenty years > -- when my husband was alive. " > > --Dr. Swanson, Corvallis, OR > > > I was caring for a woman from Kentucky and asked, > So, how's your breakfast this morning? " > It's very good, except for the Kentucky > Jelly. I can't seem to get used to the taste, " > the patient replied. I then asked to see the > jelly and the woman produced a foil packet > labeled " KY Jelly. " > > --Dr. Leonard Kransdorf, Detroit, MI > > And Finally . . . . . > > A new, young MD doing his > residency in OB was quite > embarrassed performing > female pelvic exams. To cover > his embarrassment he had > unconsciously formed > a habit of whistling softly. > > The middle aged lady upon whom > he was performing this > exam suddenly burst > out laughing and further > embarrassed him. He looked up > from his work and > sheepishly said, " I'm sorry. > Was I tickling you? " > > She replied, " No doctor, > but the song you were > whistling was 'I wish I was > an Meyer Wiener. " > > --won't admit his name > > > These are too funny to be made up!! > They're a hoot...pass em along!! > > NOTICE: This e-mail message and all attachments transmitted with it may > contain legally privileged and confidential information intended solely > for the use of the addressee. If the reader of this message is not the > intended recipient, you are hereby notified that any reading, > dissemination, distribution, copying, or other use of this message or > its attachments, hyperlinks, or any other files of any kind is strictly > prohibited. If you have received this message in error, please notify > the sender immediately by telephone () or by a reply to this > electronic mail message and delete this message and all copies and > backups thereof. > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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