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Re: Weight Regain / SLD, Etc.

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> I have a very sensitive question to pose to the group regarding weight

regain. What happens to us that lets so much weight come back on before we

get into someone's face about checking out the mechanical integrity of our

surgery tool?

>>

I just think we are all different with this - same as some of us freaked at

250 and others not till 400lb...... we all have a different tolerance level

and comfort level and varying degrees of denial and acceptance.

I was nuts at a 15lb gain and found out my thyroid went whacko and by 20 I

couldn't stand it - had seen 3 new docs about my thyroid and finally the

weight stopped and the thyroid is being treated.

it could be thyroid weight or it could have been my third year regain....

will I ever really know?

I'd rather blame the thyroid than myself but I do know my eating habits got

somewhat sloppy then as I was traveling more than 50% of the time.

sue

[swVA]

Weight Regain / SLD, Etc.

I mean, what is the head trip? What are the messages being

> heard internally that allow us to regain 50 or more pounds before finding

out

> what's going on? Is it denial? Is it fear of embarrassment? Similar to

> other things that keep people away from doctors?

>

> I'm hoping to learn something from those of us who have unfortunately

found

> themselves going through that. What warnings can you give to the rest of

us?

> How does the denial, or what ever else it is, hold on for so many added

> pounds? Please know that I'm not trying to judge anyone here... I want to

be

> armed and ready if at all possible so I can turn on the right tapes in my

> head to help myself in the future if need be.

>

> Someone (okay, my shrink! LOL) told me he thought that having a " plan, "

> regardless of what personal plan you chose, was more likely than not very

> important. Right now, my plan is using the scale, every single day, for

> accountability. I KNOW from my own past experience that the only time I

try

> to avoid the scale is when I'm gaining. So I know that NOT weighing for

me

> is a dangerous path to get on.

>

> I'm interested in knowing what insights are out there in this very learned

> group.

>

> Beth

> Houston, TX

> VBG - Dr. Srungaram

> 05/31/00 - 314 lbs.

> 04/08/02 - 169 lbs.

> 5'10 "

>

> Homepage: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Graduate-OSSG

>

> Unsubscribe: mailto:Graduate-OSSG-unsubscribe

>

>

>

>

>

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In a message dated 5/15/02 10:22:32 PM Eastern Daylight Time,

Graduate-OSSG writes:

<< What happens to us that lets so much weight come back on before we

get into someone's face about checking out the mechanical integrity of our

surgery tool? I mean, what is the head trip? What are the messages being

heard internally that allow us to regain 50 or more pounds before finding

out

what's going on? Is it denial? Is it fear of embarrassment? Similar to

other things that keep people away from doctors? >>

*****************************************

I didn't wait until I gained, but rather until I stopped losing at less than

6 months out before I called my surgeon, who told me to have an upper GI, and

learned of my staple line disruption. But, my surgeon was open to the

possibility that it may be a mechanical failure. Unfortunately, many

surgeons refuse to believe it might be the surgery's fault, rather than ours.

And, after years of being told obesity is OUR fault, I'm sure many people

believe they are the failures, not the surgery. After all, it's been pounded

into our heads by ignorant doctors and society since many of us were

children.

The other, often elusive, mechanical failure is the enlarged stoma. When I

had my lap transection, Dr. Gagner told me my stoma was stretched to the max,

but he assured me it wouldn't stretch any more. He did tell me it was just

too dangerous an operation to fix while I was under for the transection, so I

live with it. But, I still can't eat much at one sitting, so the surgery is

working just fine. Right now, I know that I just have to work the surgery,

rather than it working me. It takes a little more effort, but it's oh so

much easier than before, so I'm a happy camper!

in NJ

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DON'T take it personally, If your SLD or your pouch or stoma stretches, it's

NOT your fault. Oh sure, you can stretch your pouch, but when it just goes

FFFPHHHHHHH and gives up any semblance of stretch, that's mechanical, not

character.

I was very surprised to hear people try to avoid discussing SLD. JUST

CHECK, says me, ever practical. Noooo, they said, cannot check. Is it

EASIER to take it personally? More FAMILIAR? We're so accustomed to failing

at everything we try, is it easier to just say, yep, it hit me again, rather

than go SEE?

I dunno. I know I'm always kinda one-off from everyone else, so when mine

went, I just went & got it checked. ASAP. To me, other than the physical

pain of the acid, the mental terror of regain and the emotional nightmare of

the insurance games, it was JUST A FLAT TIRE. It was no more my fault than

running over a nail I cannot see at freeway speeds.

I wish I knew what to tell you, Beth. To me, if I suddenly started gaining

now, AND there were no Peeps in sight, I'd be right there knocking on the

door of the EGD lab wanting someone to stick an eyeball in there and fill me

in. Mysteries are OK in a book, but they are NOT ok in my body.

Thanks,

http://www.vitalady.com

For info on PayPal, click this link:

https://secure.paypal.com/affil/pal=vitalady%40bigfoot.com

Weight Regain / SLD, Etc.

> I have a very sensitive question to pose to the group regarding weight

> regain. What happens to us that lets so much weight come back on before

we

> get into someone's face about checking out the mechanical integrity of our

> surgery tool? I mean, what is the head trip? What are the messages being

> heard internally that allow us to regain 50 or more pounds before finding

out

> what's going on? Is it denial? Is it fear of embarrassment? Similar to

> other things that keep people away from doctors?

>

> I'm hoping to learn something from those of us who have unfortunately

found

> themselves going through that. What warnings can you give to the rest of

us?

> How does the denial, or what ever else it is, hold on for so many added

> pounds? Please know that I'm not trying to judge anyone here... I want to

be

> armed and ready if at all possible so I can turn on the right tapes in my

> head to help myself in the future if need be.

>

> Someone (okay, my shrink! LOL) told me he thought that having a " plan, "

> regardless of what personal plan you chose, was more likely than not very

> important. Right now, my plan is using the scale, every single day, for

> accountability. I KNOW from my own past experience that the only time I

try

> to avoid the scale is when I'm gaining. So I know that NOT weighing for

me

> is a dangerous path to get on.

>

> I'm interested in knowing what insights are out there in this very learned

> group.

>

> Beth

> Houston, TX

> VBG - Dr. Srungaram

> 05/31/00 - 314 lbs.

> 04/08/02 - 169 lbs.

> 5'10 "

>

> Homepage: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Graduate-OSSG

>

> Unsubscribe: mailto:Graduate-OSSG-unsubscribe

>

>

>

>

>

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In a message dated 5/16/02 6:26:04 PM US Eastern Standard Time,

zipwls01@... writes:

> . I feel like I am in cement

> sinking..... Maybe I will call him. Maybe. Thanks

> for the post.

Bill, CALL CALL CALL!!!!! If you don't I will. I can find out who he is and

call him and sic him on you!

Honey, you have not gone through all of this to suffer more now. He can help.

CALL him. Please.

Interestingly enough, my surgeon wants to see us every six months after we

pass year 2, because she thinks year 3 and 4 are the danger years and she

wants to monitor us more closely then.

Please please please call. We can't stand to see you unhappy. Get this fixed.

Maybe there is something wrong and you are unaware of it.

hugs,

Ann

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Amen and amen. I agree 100%. I am always shocked to find that most

of the formerly MO feel mechanical failure, such as a SLD, as a

character flaw. After all, they say, if I've even thought about

failure, I must have brought this on myself!

Don't beat yourself up. If I suddenly, unexplicably started gaining

weight for no reason you know I would be pounding on my surgeon's

door. I would be there at 8am, whether he wanted to see me or not.

I would take a butcher knife and cut my own danged self open, to show

him I was mechancially defected. Just joking :)

I would hop up on the darned OR table myself and chant " slice me,

slice me, " until they knocked me out.

No way I'm going back. No life that way. That path only leads to

destruction. I don't care whose fault it is, mine or theirs. I

don't care if I ate 's cat and broke open my own pouch,

someone is gonna fix that sucker for me, because I am NOT going back

to MO, no way, no how.

Felicia :)

PS: Just kidding about the cat, lol, knew I'd get you going!

> DON'T take it personally, If your SLD or your pouch or stoma

stretches, it's

> NOT your fault. Oh sure, you can stretch your pouch, but when it

just goes

> FFFPHHHHHHH and gives up any semblance of stretch, that's

mechanical, not

> character.

>

> I was very surprised to hear people try to avoid discussing SLD.

JUST

> CHECK, says me, ever practical. Noooo, they said, cannot check.

Is it

> EASIER to take it personally? More FAMILIAR? We're so accustomed

to failing

> at everything we try, is it easier to just say, yep, it hit me

again, rather

> than go SEE?

>

> I dunno. I know I'm always kinda one-off from everyone else, so

when mine

> went, I just went & got it checked. ASAP. To me, other than the

physical

> pain of the acid, the mental terror of regain and the emotional

nightmare of

> the insurance games, it was JUST A FLAT TIRE. It was no more my

fault than

> running over a nail I cannot see at freeway speeds.

>

> I wish I knew what to tell you, Beth. To me, if I suddenly started

gaining

> now, AND there were no Peeps in sight, I'd be right there knocking

on the

> door of the EGD lab wanting someone to stick an eyeball in there

and fill me

> in. Mysteries are OK in a book, but they are NOT ok in my body.

>

> Thanks,

>

>

> http://www.vitalady.com

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Bill,

Your surgeon is the best to go back to to check the intregity of your

surgery. However, if you just can't make yourself do this, go to someone

else. Go to another wls, or discuss with your pcp what needs to be done and

looked for. You deserve this!

Dawn--far south suburban Chicago, IL area

Dr. Hess, Bowling Green, OH

BPD/DS

4/27/00

www.duodenalswitch.com

267 to 160 5' 4 " O.K. The 5 pounds I lost end Dec./Beg. Jan has stayed off

so I changed it!

size 22 to size 10

have made size goal

no more high blood pressure, sore feet, or dieting

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very cool post Beth and it hit me like a splash of

cold water. I am ashamed to go back to my doctor. I

was one of his model patients. I did everything right.

I lost a great deal..looked good...had incredibly

positive life changes....spoke for him at his weight

loss groups...and I cannot face him now. I regained

about 80 pounds. I am so so sad so so very down on

myself. But I am thinking now...maybe he can fix

it??? Or am I kidding myself? Would there ever be a

purely surgical fix or will I always work to destroy

it? I know what I have to do to lose the weight I

lost..but I can't. I have advanced academic degrees

and I feel like a fool. I feel like I am in cement

sinking..... Maybe I will call him. Maybe. Thanks

for the post. Peace

Bill from CT.

--- BethVBG@... wrote:

> I have a very sensitive question to pose to the

> group regarding weight

> regain. What happens to us that lets so much weight

> come back on before we

> get into someone's face about checking out the

> mechanical integrity of our

> surgery tool? I mean, what is the head trip? What

> are the messages being

> heard internally that allow us to regain 50 or more

> pounds before finding out

> what's going on? Is it denial? Is it fear of

> embarrassment? Similar to

> other things that keep people away from doctors?

>

> I'm hoping to learn something from those of us who

> have unfortunately found

> themselves going through that. What warnings can

> you give to the rest of us?

> How does the denial, or what ever else it is, hold

> on for so many added

> pounds? Please know that I'm not trying to judge

> anyone here... I want to be

> armed and ready if at all possible so I can turn on

> the right tapes in my

> head to help myself in the future if need be.

>

> Someone (okay, my shrink! LOL) told me he thought

> that having a " plan, "

> regardless of what personal plan you chose, was more

> likely than not very

> important. Right now, my plan is using the scale,

> every single day, for

> accountability. I KNOW from my own past experience

> that the only time I try

> to avoid the scale is when I'm gaining. So I know

> that NOT weighing for me

> is a dangerous path to get on.

>

> I'm interested in knowing what insights are out

> there in this very learned

> group.

>

> Beth

> Houston, TX

> VBG - Dr. Srungaram

> 05/31/00 - 314 lbs.

> 04/08/02 - 169 lbs.

> 5'10 "

>

> Homepage:

> http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Graduate-OSSG

>

> Unsubscribe:

> mailto:Graduate-OSSG-unsubscribe

>

>

>

>

>

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Hey Bill in CT

I know how you feel about the regain. GO BACK TO YOUR

SURGEON FOR FOLLOW UPS. That is the one thing I did

not stop doing. My surgeon was so supportive at my 5

yr followup. I was 64 lbs up from my low

weight...grazing, poor food choices, not exercising,

old preop habits were back. I was ashamed and

embarassed and was failing AGAIN!!!. My surgeon said

*You did not fail, you took a detour*. AFter that she

has seen me every 6 months for *accoutabilty*. Of

course I did some major changes in my daily habits

including upping the protein (thanks to mama Michele

browbeating me for a while), avoiding all forms of

sugar and keeping the carbs low amongst other things)

I knew I did not have SLD, because when I ate the way

I was supposed to, I got full fast. But, I was grazing

and given the fact that the pouch empties out in about

30 minutes, hey, that's a lot of consumption all day.

And my grazing foods were...pretzels, cheese nips,

popcorn, well glory be, CARBS!!!. And I was back into

sugar, so again, it was not SLD, it was LMS (lawn

mower syndrome LOL)

I lost that 64 lbs between 5 and 7 yrs post op and got

to 1 anything and am now within 10 lbs of my surgeon's

goal (Last freakin 10 lbs does NOT want to come off

ARRRRGGGHHHH!)

So, it can be turned around even after 5 years. I am

a short proximal (50 cm bypassed) and have no more

will power than anyone else. I am a food addict and

still love to eat. I just pick my splurges carefully

today and accept responsibility for what I do.

(guess I had to grow up, but I don't wanna!!!)

hugs

Rita in Vermont

5'8 "

rny 3/31/94 463 lbs

today 190ish and maintaining a size 12

__________________________________________________

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Thanks, Rita, for sharing your story. It's something I really needed to hear.

After not losing after 8 months post-op, I get so incredibly discouraged. I

know it can be done. I can't wait around for somebody else to do it for me. I

have to do it myself.

---------------------------------

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In a message dated 5/16/2002 3:12:08 PM Pacific Standard Time, fzdyer@...

writes:

> No way I'm going back. No life that way. That path only leads to

> destruction. I don't care whose fault it is, mine or theirs. I

> don't care if I ate 's cat and broke open my own pouch,

> someone is gonna fix that sucker for me, because I am NOT going back

> to MO, no way, no how.

>

That's the key . . . be determined to stay healthy regardless of why you got

MO. Beating ourselves up never made us thinner cause if it did, we'd all

need to gain weight! I know I will never go back. I deserve to be slim and

healthy and will do what it takes (heathy, not stupid of course) to stay

here. If I began gaining weight by my own behavior, I would change it and

fast with help if necessary . . .If my behavior didn't change and my weight

did, I'd see a specialist for medical intervention! I am no longer numb and

know myself well, I take total responsibility for staying here . . .

:o) Vicki

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