Todays Helping of Chicken Soup for the Soul

[Guest guest]

Getting My Priorities Straight

By Sybella V. Ferguson Patten

One of today's most precious commodities is time. No matter how many

gadgets we buy, books we read or classes we take, there is no quick fix to

busyness.

As a working mother, I constantly juggle the demands of work, personal

interests, household errands and my children's school activities - games,

practices, music lessons, rehearsals and performances. These activities are

designed to enrich my children's lives and develop their skills, talents and

values.

However, mothers can be so busy juggling that they lose sight of the

true

purposes for the child's participation in these activities. From infancy,

children seek parental approval and attention. Parents heap tons of

encouragement and praise as the baby learns to crawl, pull up, walk, speak,

hit

the ball - the list goes on and on. As the child grows older, simple

learning

tasks are replaced with other activities such as sports, cheerleading or

music.

Parents are always on the sidelines or in the audience cheering, cajoling,

clapping and encouraging.

However, sooner or later, a working mother is faced with a major

conflict

between some personal or business commitment and her child's game, play,

concert

or other event. She can't be in two places at once. Her heart is ripped

into

pieces trying to decide what to do; what is best for her child; what would a

good mother do; how to make a bad situation into a win-win for everyone.

I experienced one of those decisive situations when my daughter's

school

district hosted its annual " String Fest, " where five school orchestras are

packed into a gymnasium along with a sea of family and friends. The

participants were to arrive about forty-five minutes earlier than the

event's

start time so that the musicians could tune and warm up their instruments.

As

often happens, the event occurred during a crunch period for both my

husband's

and my jobs. We arranged for my teenage son to drop off his sister at the

appointed time.

My daughter, who was very much aware of my time-management efforts,

attempted to cut me some slack by saying, " Mom, you don't have to come

tonight.

Just be there on time to take me home. " I couldn't have asked for a better

solution. I wouldn't have to fight the rush-hour traffic for my thirty-two

mile

commute. I could work a couple more hours. By then the traffic would be

light,

and I could make it to the gymnasium in record time. Besides, how many

concerts

had I already attended? I could afford to miss this one, right?

After pondering my choices, I decided it was not okay with me if I was

absent. Even though my daughter had given me her permission to miss the

concert, it did not justify my absence. I felt guilty enough for my not

taking

her to the concert. I left work and arrived just before the concert began.

I

found a seat in the bleachers several rows directly across from my

daughter's

orchestra. I had her in my line of sight, but in the ocean of faces, she

would

never see me.

As I watched, the warm-up session ended and my daughter put her violin

aside. I saw my daughter's eyes as they began to scan the audience row by

row,

looking for a familiar face. When her eyes found me, I was waving my arms

in

that embarrassing way mothers do, and we exchanged smiles. Her body

language

said it all. I had " made her night. " No promotion, raise, bonus or

anything

could ever pay for that moment. It was an image that is forever etched in

our

hearts and memories and could never be recorded with a camera or camcorder.

It

was just two hearts exchanging love across the gymnasium.