crazy labels

[Guest guest]

That’s a great one!

From:

minniemyno@...

Sent: Thursday, April 08, 2004

11:14 AM

On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary.

Details inside.

(the

shoplifter special)?

On a bar of Dial soap -- " Directions: Use like regular soap. "

(and

that would be how???....)

On some Swanson frozen

dinners -- " Serving suggestion:

Defrost. "

(but,

it's " just " a suggestion).

On Tesco's Tiramisu

dessert (printed on bottom) --

" Do not turn upside down. "

(well...duh,

a bit late, huh)!

On Marks & Spencer

Bread Pudding --

" Product will be hot after heating. "

(...and

you thought????...)

On packaging for a

Rowenta iron --

" Do not iron clothes on body. "

(but

wouldn't this save me more time)?

On Boot's Children Cough

Medicine -- " Do not drive a car

or operate machinery after taking this medication. "

(We

could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just

get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid -- " Warning: May cause drowsiness. "

(and...I'm

taking this because???....)

On most brands of

Christmas lights --

" For indoor or outdoor use only. "

(as

opposed to...what)?

On a Japanese food

processor -- " Not to be used for

the other use. "

(now,

somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts -- " Warning: contains nuts. "

(talk

about a news flash)

On an American Airlines

packet of nuts --

" Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts. "

(Step

3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)

On a child's Superman

costume -- " Wearing of this

garment does not enable you to fly. "

(I

don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)

On a Swedish chainsaw -- " Do not attempt to stop chain with your

hands or genitals. "

(Oh my

God...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)