RELIEF

[Guest guest]

Kim-

Positive! Yay! It's like the 'overnight success " who's been at it for

years behind the limelight.

But to finally get to the payoff.... Sweet!

So these thoughts came to mind from our own experience. I know you

already have this down,

but I'll post it anyway and you can add to it, in case someone else is

approaching a school

transition.

Certainly, reps from his next school will need to sit in on meetings

starting early next year.

And whether they want to or not, I would want someone from the new placement

spending observation days. And forget the IEP. I'd write my own very

specific lists of supports and services of physical, educational, social,

behavioral protocols that are tried and true, and MUST be in place. (I know

you have

yours written), and make them commit early as to whether they are going to be

able to provide or not. No " we'll try it " or " let's see how it goes " .

You'll need time to go " Program Shopping " , if you have to.

And he should spend time in the new school next spring, and a summer program

there would be

even better.

--

is taking a psychology course at a local community college,

starting this coming Monday night.

Her math teacher is going to go with her. They'll take a cab to and fro.

It's a 3 hour lecture each week.

So the teacher will be able to identify what supports is going to need

to succeed at that level

in what will be an incredibly challenging environment after so many years at

familiar and supportive Perkins.

I'm so relieved she'll be with somebody, and we'll have that assessment of

what's necessary for her

success.

--

Now add to this. We're trying to get some info down so each parent doesn't

have to start from scratch.

Michele has awesomely volunteered to put her organization skills to it, so

we should have a

beautiful product when all's said and done.

Congratulations to both you and Dylan,

in Ma. (, 21 yrs)

[Guest guest]

Well we had Dylan's staffing today.

It was attended by 12 people in addition to me and Dylan.

I facilitated, covered the numerous positive things we have seen, then

individually brought up concerns that have been raised throughout the

year at other meetings. In each situation we either found a positive

next step to focus on or felt what we were doing was good for now. We

even found ways to begin addressing middle school transistion even

though that is 1 1/2 years away. No one raised strong concerns about

any subject, particularly Dylan's safety and the safety of others,

which has been an underlying concern throughout the year. It was

acknowledged that by shifting focus back to letting Dylan's state

guide us, rather than expectations about what other kids that age are

doing, that we have fewer frantic episodes and clearly he is learning.

It seems that the " Dylan " training I was able to do in October has

made some impact.

The only issue not fully resolved is how to find an appropriate

classroom placement for Dylan that allows for his individual needs to

be met, but also allows for being part of the group and so on, and

allows for the teacher to also understand deafblindness.

I am so thankful there were no unwelcome surprises.

--

Kim

Certified HANDLE Screener and Intern

Mom to Dylan 10 CHaRGE, Kayla 16, Tyler 18

and wife to Roy who makes all things possible in our lives.

[Guest guest]

cool that is good

>

> Well we had Dylan's staffing today.

> It was attended by 12 people in addition to me and Dylan.

> I facilitated, covered the numerous positive things we have seen, then

> individually brought up concerns that have been raised throughout the

> year at other meetings. In each situation we either found a positive

> next step to focus on or felt what we were doing was good for now. We

> even found ways to begin addressing middle school transistion even

> though that is 1 1/2 years away. No one raised strong concerns about

> any subject, particularly Dylan's safety and the safety of others,

> which has been an underlying concern throughout the year. It was

> acknowledged that by shifting focus back to letting Dylan's state

> guide us, rather than expectations about what other kids that age are

> doing, that we have fewer frantic episodes and clearly he is learning.

> It seems that the " Dylan " training I was able to do in October has

> made some impact.

> The only issue not fully resolved is how to find an appropriate

> classroom placement for Dylan that allows for his individual needs to

> be met, but also allows for being part of the group and so on, and

> allows for the teacher to also understand deafblindness.

>

> I am so thankful there were no unwelcome surprises.

> --

> Kim

> Certified HANDLE Screener and Intern

> Mom to Dylan 10 CHaRGE, Kayla 16, Tyler 18

> and wife to Roy who makes all things possible in our lives.

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

Overnight success, more like another day of negotiating, documenting,

and gently pushing forward towards the next step.

As for transition, it is almost certain that Dylan would stay at ASDB

through all of his school years - at least that is what I work so hard

for, to keep relationships positive for 18 years of schooling.... His

support staff remains very much the same, it is teachers and admin

that change. Through some of the activities we are setting up to

start now, (taking orders for someone in elementary, going over to the

middle school Java Jut, then purchasing and delivering) he will meet

the Middle School teachers and get comfortable with that building on

campus. The Java Hut is part of the functional education program for

School for the Deaf, but some students from School for the Blind

participate with it. It is always the goal to switch Dylan from

School for the Blind to School for the Deaf when he can visually

handle a signing environment, so this is a way to get some of those

connections started.

Wow going to community college - what a great plan to have

someone else go with as part of her transition.

What information does Michele need?

Kim

Certified HANDLE Screener and Intern

Mom to Dylan 10 CHaRGE, Kayla 16, Tyler 18

and wife to Roy who makes all things possible in our lives.

[Guest guest]

Kim,

WOW! It sure sounds like you are on a roll!! This sounds like it was a really

wonderful staffing and that everyone was on the same page; I hope you are

savoring the feeling, the success, and the hope.

I think you are smart to start thinking of the transition now--it can give

everyone a plan and ways to work on it to make it a successful move for

everyone, most especially the man of the hour, Dylan himself.

I will be looking forward to the progress reports and the implementation of the

plan for transition.

pam

RELIEF

Well we had Dylan's staffing today.

It was attended by 12 people in addition to me and Dylan.

I facilitated, covered the numerous positive things we have seen, then

individually brought up concerns that have been raised throughout the

year at other meetings. In each situation we either found a positive

next step to focus on or felt what we were doing was good for now. We

even found ways to begin addressing middle school transistion even

though that is 1 1/2 years away. No one raised strong concerns about

any subject, particularly Dylan's safety and the safety of others,

which has been an underlying concern throughout the year. It was

acknowledged that by shifting focus back to letting Dylan's state

guide us, rather than expectations about what other kids that age are

doing, that we have fewer frantic episodes and clearly he is learning.

It seems that the " Dylan " training I was able to do in October has

made some impact.

The only issue not fully resolved is how to find an appropriate

classroom placement for Dylan that allows for his individual needs to

be met, but also allows for being part of the group and so on, and

allows for the teacher to also understand deafblindness.

I am so thankful there were no unwelcome surprises.

--

Kim

Certified HANDLE Screener and Intern

Mom to Dylan 10 CHaRGE, Kayla 16, Tyler 18

and wife to Roy who makes all things possible in our lives.

[Guest guest]

said: " Now add to this. We're trying to get some info down so each

parent doesn't

have to start from scratch.

Michele has awesomely volunteered to put her organization skills to it, so

we should have a

beautiful product when all's said and done. "

Ok - that's putting on a bit of pressure!!! I'm not sure how quickly I'll

get to it. And I hope we don't find that the task is so cumbersome as to

not yield the results we're looking for. You guys, keep coaxing me so that

I don't keep it on the back burner.

Michele

[Guest guest]

mistake. I meant to say patient's with BP family members.

[Guest guest]

Congrats on things going smoother and getting some healing for yourself, after

initiating Low Contact. Taking firm control of the relationship " rules " with

the bpd parent (becoming the " manager " in a gentle but assertive way) seems to

me to be a viable way of handling some bpd parent/adult child relationships.

And yes, isn't it great and validating to find someone in real life who

understands completely and can share a little empathy and humor with you. I

find that very endearing, myself.

-Annie

>

> It's been a long time since I posted or even read up here. My life is going

much better now. It's been years since I've been low contact. I feel much more

in touch with my emotions, and making progress in my ability to respect and

nurture the part of me that feels them.

>

> I wanted to relate a positive interaction I had the other day. I was talking

with a friend of mine who also had a father with BP like symptoms. A mutual

friend and medical doctor talked about her experience with patients who had BP,

and how they split/oscillated between different doctors being all good and all

bad. Her matter of fact attitude, eye rolling, and flippancy at the

ridiculousness of the BP behavior was so refreshing!

>

> To continue along the lines of laughter, I want to use the dada generator

below to create random BP rants. http://www.elsewhere.org/pomo/

>

> I think it would be funny to use it to troll BP people using such generator.

(I realize this sounds a little sadistic, and BP people are suffering too, but

the humor I get from thought of my BP dad having a BP shit fit back and forth

with a computer is very cathartic.)

>