Re: injuries/frustration/ and sports

[Guest guest]

Hi Sherry and everyone,

I am sorry to hear about Josh's incident and hope he's much

better since you last wrote the group. I've been out of the

loop for a while and not current on group messages.

I know you’re a very caring mother and I understand your

feelings of concerns about Josh and his communication

difficulties. Your fear hits those of us that are parents

right in the heart. Having a child you love in pain and not

being able to say what hurts and why is one of our greatest

fears of having a verbally impaired child.

My son Khalid, who grew up with Global Apraxia, both verbal

and body, (soon to be 18) and has overcome much of his

Apraxia. It wasn't an easy road for any of us as many of

you have read stories of our past experiences. This

includes sports.

Many children may not have Apraxia of the body as well- my

son did. Due to weakness and motor planning problems that

he worked hard to overcome, Khalid had his share of two arm

breaks, and several knee/ankle injuries with sports and

everyday play. On one such occasion he broke his arm at age

6, uncoordinated, he fell off his bike. Having trouble with

communication, we too did not understand just how bad his

injuries were. When tears can only tell you he is hurt, it

doesn't say how much. It was the middle of the night when

we realized this as his arm swelled more and more and we

headed for the emergency room for an x-ray.

Like you, I'm also a soccer mom this year to my daughter

Danya (team Goalie) who doesn't have Apraxia, and my

youngest son Jadd who like his brother was diagnosed with

oral Apraxia, which he has overcome. Both Danya and Jadd

are playing this season and are natural players in the

game. Happy to report with (unbroken) fingers crossed, no

injuries yet with soccer, however, we are early in the

season.

Just want to say I have been there with the trials of sport

injuries with and without speech problems to add to the

pain of the situation. Khalid started soccer age 6 and it

was eleven years ago I was a mom with concern about Khalid

playing soccer. To see Khalid get hurt physically and

emotionally (self-esteem) was more than I could bear at

times. Apart from the obstacles Khalid faced with global

apraxia (undiagnosed at that time) he longed to be on a

team no matter what.

Khalid's younger years my husband and I went around and

around to what we believe was best for him. Not always was

there an agreement, I had truly feared the outcome of more

injuries to come. While I look at it this way, my husband

saw our son's future believing by being part of the team

could meet Khalid's ambition, not just to " play sports " ,

but rather to be a part of the mainstream with kids. Being

that no kids are immune from sports injuries, except those

that don't play, we choose to let him play. For Khaild my

fears were not only for his ability to communicate well

enough- but his ability to keep up physically being that

his Global Apraxia caused him clumsiness and fatigue.

Khalid however pushed to keep up with others, some days he

pushed too hard. There were games he would play at that

would leave me feeling powerless to make it better for him.

Despite my worries, Khalid's eagerness would bring us back

to the games each week. I silently struggled with this for

years, in need of answers- torn between Khalid's desires,

and my wanting to protect him from any type of suffering.

My husband, through the years has helped me realize that

sheltering was limiting our son. To let go and have faith

that he can work through the positive and negative of

experiences in life. Khalid needed my part to believe that

he can do these things.

I finally did arrive at that peaceful place with Khalid.

I'd follow his heart and stand by him through those

difficult times and rejoice with him in triumphant times.

Looking back I can see each game a celebration- a step

toward shaping the awesome person he is today! The lessons

learned and rewards received from the participation of

sports far over shadow any injuries, tears and growing

pains that came along the way. Khalid is thrilled to hear

of Josh, and the children here getting involved with

sports. He encourages all kids to hang in there, the skills

and coordination improves with practice.

And speaking of injuries, Khalid has a sprained ankle from

playing basketball. Not expressing a word of concern to

anyone, yesterday I was taken back to find his ankle swollen.

Not one to complain, now days like most teens, the only

setback he has with communication at times, is just

choosing not and when to communicate. Ahhh! Consequently

what I found through the years of experience with Khalid,

that even if Josh could be understood when he spoke, like

my son there is a chance like most other boys who are

injured in sports don't take it as hard as we the parents

do. Case on point, Khalid's major concern and question with

the doctor- how long before he can play basketball :0)

In closing for parents asking about Khalid, I’m pleased to

say he is doing very well thus far his senior year. He is

preparing to take his ACT assessment and plans to take his

first course at the University in January. Khalid is a

confident driver and loves his new found independence. Jadd

and Danya are thrilled to have a brother who drives them at

their whim. He really likes working his part time job where

students/friends go afterschool. He works out daily and plays

basketball games at the Sports Center. He has a very busy

social life with friends in and out of school. I joke that

the phone is in our house for Khalid alone! This is something

I can say with a huge smile- considering years ago talking on

the phone was not something he liked to do.

Khalid's favorite quote taken from a Jordan poster

that still hangs in his room.

" I missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I've lost

almost 300 games. Twenty-six times I've been trusted to

take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and

over and over again in my life and that is why I succeed. "

Warm wishes to all,

Mustafa

[Guest guest]

It is so nice to hear from you & to hear that Khalid is doing well. The

senior year is such a neat thing for any child to go through, let alone a

child that has had his share of challenges along the way. Thanks for

sharing!!

You are in my prayers

Tammy I. in FL

From: M.<khalidsvision@...>

In closing for parents asking about Khalid, I’m pleased to

say he is doing very well thus far his senior year. He is

preparing to take his ACT assessment and plans to take his

first course at the University in January. Khalid is a

confident driver and loves his new found independence. Jadd

and Danya are thrilled to have a brother who drives them at

their whim. He really likes working his part time job where

students/friends go afterschool. He works out daily and plays

basketball games at the Sports Center. He has a very busy

social life with friends in and out of school. I joke that

the phone is in our house for Khalid alone! This is something

I can say with a huge smile- considering years ago talking on

the phone was not something he liked to do.

Khalid's favorite quote taken from a Jordan poster

that still hangs in his room.

" I missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I've lost

almost 300 games. Twenty-six times I've been trusted to

take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and

over and over again in my life and that is why I succeed. "

Warm wishes to all,

Mustafa

[Guest guest]

Hi, -

So good to hear from you again. I hope your life has become more peaceful

for you and your family.

Yes, deciding whether to get Josh into a team sport was one my dh and I went

around about - I wanted him in and dh did not for the very reasons you talked

about in your email. Josh also has global apraxia (along with the verbal, the

hypotonia, and the sensory issues). Would he be able to " keep up " with the

team, would the other team members ignore him or tease him, would his abilities

not measure up and would he get frustrated, etc.? I was really pushing to get

him on a team for those very reasons - to counter them if possible and help him

build his self-esteem. That was why looking at the YMCA team was important.

Their mission, at this age, is to simply give kids a chance to learn to play on

a team in a non-competitive way and to just try to learn the rules of the sport.

While I keep score for myself at the games, technically they don't. We all

cheer for all the kids. Competition can come later or through school but I

thought the Y's approach was really great for what we

wanted to see happen with Josh (dh finally agreed this was a good idea). It

was so wonderful to hear all the parents cheering for Josh when he did play the

first game, patting him on the back after the game, etc. And it was great that

there were a couple of kids who really " partnered up " with him - had him sit by

them, helped him stay in his position, cheered him on when the ball was coming

near him, etc. That's why not being able to play now is so tough - he's missing

out on that now.

I know injuries are going to be part of his life - just like all kids. We

certainly had our share of dance and playyard injuries with our daughter! It's

the communication part of it, right now, that was so hard - his teachers all

feel sooo guilty about not having understood him when he really was trying to

tell them his hand was injured. His slp said he was walking down the hallway

afterward, holding his hand up and saying " boo boo " - don't what else he could

have said, for him, to have someone at least take a look at his hand! But, as

they explained, they were more concerned at the moment with his lip bleeding and

getting ice on that (that turned out to be just fine - just a slight cut on his

lip, no tooth damage or anything like that). I think they learned a lesson from

this incident - that, a) Josh really does communicate his needs and wants quite

clearly and that not only does Josh need to gain more ability to

speak/communicate but they need to learn to understand not

just Josh's communications but all the kids in their care. I think they

realized that was something they were taking for granted.

So glad to hear Khalid is doing so well! He has been an inspiration to a

lot of kids on this line, Josh (and me) included. Thank you for keeping us

updated and, again, I hope your life has become more peaceful.

Sherry

" M. " <khalidsvision@...> wrote:

Hi Sherry and everyone,

I am sorry to hear about Josh's incident and hope he's much

better since you last wrote the group. I've been out of the

loop for a while and not current on group messages.

I know you’re a very caring mother and I understand your

feelings of concerns about Josh and his communication

difficulties. Your fear hits those of us that are parents

right in the heart. Having a child you love in pain and not

being able to say what hurts and why is one of our greatest

fears of having a verbally impaired child.

My son Khalid, who grew up with Global Apraxia, both verbal

and body, (soon to be 18) and has overcome much of his

Apraxia. It wasn't an easy road for any of us as many of

you have read stories of our past experiences. This

includes sports.

Many children may not have Apraxia of the body as well- my

son did. Due to weakness and motor planning problems that

he worked hard to overcome, Khalid had his share of two arm

breaks, and several knee/ankle injuries with sports and

everyday play. On one such occasion he broke his arm at age

6, uncoordinated, he fell off his bike. Having trouble with

communication, we too did not understand just how bad his

injuries were. When tears can only tell you he is hurt, it

doesn't say how much. It was the middle of the night when

we realized this as his arm swelled more and more and we

headed for the emergency room for an x-ray.

Like you, I'm also a soccer mom this year to my daughter

Danya (team Goalie) who doesn't have Apraxia, and my

youngest son Jadd who like his brother was diagnosed with

oral Apraxia, which he has overcome. Both Danya and Jadd

are playing this season and are natural players in the

game. Happy to report with (unbroken) fingers crossed, no

injuries yet with soccer, however, we are early in the

season.

Just want to say I have been there with the trials of sport

injuries with and without speech problems to add to the

pain of the situation. Khalid started soccer age 6 and it

was eleven years ago I was a mom with concern about Khalid

playing soccer. To see Khalid get hurt physically and

emotionally (self-esteem) was more than I could bear at

times. Apart from the obstacles Khalid faced with global

apraxia (undiagnosed at that time) he longed to be on a

team no matter what.

Khalid's younger years my husband and I went around and

around to what we believe was best for him. Not always was

there an agreement, I had truly feared the outcome of more

injuries to come. While I look at it this way, my husband

saw our son's future believing by being part of the team

could meet Khalid's ambition, not just to " play sports " ,

but rather to be a part of the mainstream with kids. Being

that no kids are immune from sports injuries, except those

that don't play, we choose to let him play. For Khaild my

fears were not only for his ability to communicate well

enough- but his ability to keep up physically being that

his Global Apraxia caused him clumsiness and fatigue.

Khalid however pushed to keep up with others, some days he

pushed too hard. There were games he would play at that

would leave me feeling powerless to make it better for him.

Despite my worries, Khalid's eagerness would bring us back

to the games each week. I silently struggled with this for

years, in need of answers- torn between Khalid's desires,

and my wanting to protect him from any type of suffering.

My husband, through the years has helped me realize that

sheltering was limiting our son. To let go and have faith

that he can work through the positive and negative of

experiences in life. Khalid needed my part to believe that

he can do these things.

I finally did arrive at that peaceful place with Khalid.

I'd follow his heart and stand by him through those

difficult times and rejoice with him in triumphant times.

Looking back I can see each game a celebration- a step

toward shaping the awesome person he is today! The lessons

learned and rewards received from the participation of

sports far over shadow any injuries, tears and growing

pains that came along the way. Khalid is thrilled to hear

of Josh, and the children here getting involved with

sports. He encourages all kids to hang in there, the skills

and coordination improves with practice.

And speaking of injuries, Khalid has a sprained ankle from

playing basketball. Not expressing a word of concern to

anyone, yesterday I was taken back to find his ankle swollen.

Not one to complain, now days like most teens, the only

setback he has with communication at times, is just

choosing not and when to communicate. Ahhh! Consequently

what I found through the years of experience with Khalid,

that even if Josh could be understood when he spoke, like

my son there is a chance like most other boys who are

injured in sports don't take it as hard as we the parents

do. Case on point, Khalid's major concern and question with

the doctor- how long before he can play basketball :0)

In closing for parents asking about Khalid, I’m pleased to

say he is doing very well thus far his senior year. He is

preparing to take his ACT assessment and plans to take his

first course at the University in January. Khalid is a

confident driver and loves his new found independence. Jadd

and Danya are thrilled to have a brother who drives them at

their whim. He really likes working his part time job where

students/friends go afterschool. He works out daily and plays

basketball games at the Sports Center. He has a very busy

social life with friends in and out of school. I joke that

the phone is in our house for Khalid alone! This is something

I can say with a huge smile- considering years ago talking on

the phone was not something he liked to do.

Khalid's favorite quote taken from a Jordan poster

that still hangs in his room.

" I missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I've lost

almost 300 games. Twenty-six times I've been trusted to

take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and

over and over again in my life and that is why I succeed. "

Warm wishes to all,

Mustafa

New book on late talking! http://www.speechville.com/late.talker.html

[Guest guest]

Dear and Khalid!

I know you haven't been around much due to your identical twin sister/aunt who

moved to Texas, was diagnosed with cancer -and since moved again and

has been going through cancer treatments now in Tennessee. With you

in New Mexico -I know how hard it is for your family not be there all the

time with her and how close the two of you are. On a positive note -

it's so great to hear that with this forth round of treatment/chemo is

responding in spite of how sick it made her at first.

I'm just curious if studies have ever been done on identical twins

and cancer to see if there are any links between environmental and

cancer in spite of genetics.

You lived in New Mexico all your life while your sister did too cancer free

until the three years she moved to Houston Texas. Like New Jersey where we

are from -this group has high numbers in Texas. Where there are lots of

our children -don't have to dig too deep to find a higher number of

other conditions, like cancer -which is why in spite of hurricanes

I'm sticking to Florida.

http://www.cherab.org/news/Save.html

Thank you so much for your awesome updates! you are far too

modest in Khalid's case about how well he does in sports, and in

school. Khalid's been a huge inspiration for all of us!

http://www.cherab.org/information/familiesrelate/success.html

Khalid is as Deborah Norville put it " A true success story "

http://www.cherab.org/news/insideedition.html Khalid's story is just

amazing -which is why it's also featured in The Late Talker book.

And it's so funny how you write how Khalid pushes himself more than

you can take at times. On the phone with you yesterday Khalid with

his sprained ankle's main concern is how soon 'til he can play

basketball again!

You and Mousa are and have always been the most amazing parents with

all of your children. Khalid, the only child of yours that our

family had the pleasure to meet is just the most warm and caring

teenager I ever met. Tanner and Dakota just loved him -and he was

so good with them and the other kids there when we met for the

taping for Inside Edition in NYC and went to Mars. Khalid was even

able to calm down Evan who apparently wanted to know if forks were a

good way to communicate when you are apraxic. (remember that?!)

http://www.cherab.org/information/phototrip2000.html

And at the same time -Khalid's cool. He's like Lohan at

the 'end' of the movie Mean Girls!

http://www.meangirlsmovie.com

=====