Guest guest Posted May 28, 2006 Report Share Posted May 28, 2006 Farida, Try to hang in there. It could be scar tissue. Remember 80% of all lumps are NOT cancer. Breast cancer is not the death sentence it was once thought to be. I am sorry your husband is so mean to you. Our one son went through that with his first wife. Usually you hear that men are abusive, well this woman was the one. He would never hit her back or anything. He would leave the house and go for a ride on his motorcycle. They have been divorced approximately 14 and she has been through numerous boyfriends and still can't keep one longer than a few months. So I guess she hasn't changed. I will keep you and your daughter in my prayers. Hugs nne Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Lifehttp://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.htmlCheck out my other ornaments atwww.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.htmlLots of info and gifts at:www.cancerclub.comCinDWood Craftshttp://www.cindwoodcrafts.com Prayers needed .... Some prayers needed please. 1) I have been ten years NED. But now from past few weeks I feel a small lump like growth on the operated site. I have never felt threatened by a recurrence so far but now I fear it and feel at the bottom of a pit. I have never been on any meds for depression so far and no doctor has ever suggested it to me. I will go for my follow up after a gap of four years in June. Hope and pray that they say it is not back. 2) My husband has taken my bc very badly and has been very nasty to me. I haven't been able to get a divorce for various reasons --- custody of my kids being one of them. He has been away working in Gulf for three years now but is coming back first week of June. I dread being with him again. We never get along well. There has been no physical abuse for me but the mental torment is not very good to go through and worst being others do not understand my trauma. When there is physical abuse everyone rushes in to defend the poor victim but mental abuse is not taken seriously. Wish someone could understand. 3) I feel terrified for my daughter who is 11 yrs and not totally independent. She has been slow in achieving her milestones. If I need treatment who is going to take care of her? That is always the big question I face. The end result is I feel inside a deep and dark pit and feel miserable. I have been reading the posts and wanted to say so much to everyone but just couldn't. Hope I will be back to being myself soon.Thanks for being there for me ……….Love and prayers for everyone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 28, 2006 Report Share Posted May 28, 2006 Farida, Try to hang in there. It could be scar tissue. Remember 80% of all lumps are NOT cancer. Breast cancer is not the death sentence it was once thought to be. I am sorry your husband is so mean to you. Our one son went through that with his first wife. Usually you hear that men are abusive, well this woman was the one. He would never hit her back or anything. He would leave the house and go for a ride on his motorcycle. They have been divorced approximately 14 and she has been through numerous boyfriends and still can't keep one longer than a few months. So I guess she hasn't changed. I will keep you and your daughter in my prayers. Hugs nne Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Lifehttp://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.htmlCheck out my other ornaments atwww.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.htmlLots of info and gifts at:www.cancerclub.comCinDWood Craftshttp://www.cindwoodcrafts.com Prayers needed .... Some prayers needed please. 1) I have been ten years NED. But now from past few weeks I feel a small lump like growth on the operated site. I have never felt threatened by a recurrence so far but now I fear it and feel at the bottom of a pit. I have never been on any meds for depression so far and no doctor has ever suggested it to me. I will go for my follow up after a gap of four years in June. Hope and pray that they say it is not back. 2) My husband has taken my bc very badly and has been very nasty to me. I haven't been able to get a divorce for various reasons --- custody of my kids being one of them. He has been away working in Gulf for three years now but is coming back first week of June. I dread being with him again. We never get along well. There has been no physical abuse for me but the mental torment is not very good to go through and worst being others do not understand my trauma. When there is physical abuse everyone rushes in to defend the poor victim but mental abuse is not taken seriously. Wish someone could understand. 3) I feel terrified for my daughter who is 11 yrs and not totally independent. She has been slow in achieving her milestones. If I need treatment who is going to take care of her? That is always the big question I face. The end result is I feel inside a deep and dark pit and feel miserable. I have been reading the posts and wanted to say so much to everyone but just couldn't. Hope I will be back to being myself soon.Thanks for being there for me ……….Love and prayers for everyone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 28, 2006 Report Share Posted May 28, 2006 Farida It is good to see you here. You know you are in my prayers all the time. You need to get the lump checked out-you know it could be many things other than bc. hugs Pam Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 28, 2006 Report Share Posted May 28, 2006 Here is my prayer right now. I thank you Lord for what you are doing in this household. I thank you Lord for Farida's husband that he is coming home not like he left. That you have worked a miracle in him and he knows You now and is delivered from all of that garbage that he has had. I pray Your mighty protection over this family. I pray that you give Farida the courage that she has never had before. That you make her the head and not the tail accordning to Your word. Lord this family needs a healing and a miracle, and I thank you for it in Jesus name....Amen Farida, remember that you are strong and your peace and courage comes from God. Give it all to him, he is there for you honey. I will praying for you. Ren "A Desire to Inspire" www.menpausewomentalk.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 28, 2006 Report Share Posted May 28, 2006 Love and prayers coming your way. Do you have any family you can confide in and count on to help? Ruth > > Some prayers needed please. > 1) I have been ten years NED. But now from past few weeks I > feel a small lump like growth on the operated site. I have never > felt threatened by a recurrence so far but now I fear it and feel at > the bottom of a pit. I have never been on any meds for depression so > far and no doctor has ever suggested it to me. I will go for my > follow up after a gap of four years in June. Hope and pray that they > say it is not back. > 2) My husband has taken my bc very badly and has been very > nasty to me. I haven't been able to get a divorce for various > reasons --- custody of my kids being one of them. He has been away > working in Gulf for three years now but is coming back first week of > June. I dread being with him again. We never get along well. There > has been no physical abuse for me but the mental torment is not very > good to go through and worst being others do not understand my > trauma. When there is physical abuse everyone rushes in to defend > the poor victim but mental abuse is not taken seriously. Wish > someone could understand. > 3) I feel terrified for my daughter who is 11 yrs and not > totally independent. She has been slow in achieving her milestones. > If I need treatment who is going to take care of her? That is always > the big question I face. The end result is I feel inside a deep and > dark pit and feel miserable. I have been reading the posts and > wanted to say so much to everyone but just couldn't. Hope I will be > back to being myself soon. > Thanks for being there for me …… .Love and prayers for everyone. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 28, 2006 Report Share Posted May 28, 2006 Farida honey - Is there any way you can try to sit down and talk to him? Both of you obviously did love one another, or was this the way it was before breast cancer too? Many times, men shield themselves by doing the opposite of what they should - instead of offering support, he could be trying to protect himself by building a barrier between you both. How long is he home for each period of time? Is there a doctor who knows you both that you can speak with about possibly talking to him? Or a family member or friend? If it would only make him angry, then don't jeopardize yourself, but I was just curious. Breast cancer is NOT YOUR FAULT. YOU are the one who needs support right now, and he's very foolish to act this way. I'm sure I speak for most of us when I say we are all here for you and the negative feelings you are having are not healthy for you. You need to focus first on you, then your children, THEN your husband. Are you near his family? Have they been supportive to you? I am so sorry to hear you going through this and hugs to you dear Farida. Best, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 28, 2006 Report Share Posted May 28, 2006 Farida, do you have a close relative who might help your 11-year-old daughter in case you have to go to the hospital? A sister? Your mother? An aunt? I think if you had that " what if " planned for, it would take a load of worry off your mind. warm wishes, Nan > > Some prayers needed please. > 1) I have been ten years NED. But now from past few weeks I > feel a small lump like growth on the operated site. I have never > felt threatened by a recurrence so far but now I fear it and feel at > the bottom of a pit. I have never been on any meds for depression so > far and no doctor has ever suggested it to me. I will go for my > follow up after a gap of four years in June. Hope and pray that they > say it is not back. > 2) My husband has taken my bc very badly and has been very > nasty to me. I haven't been able to get a divorce for various > reasons --- custody of my kids being one of them. He has been away > working in Gulf for three years now but is coming back first week of > June. I dread being with him again. We never get along well. There > has been no physical abuse for me but the mental torment is not very > good to go through and worst being others do not understand my > trauma. When there is physical abuse everyone rushes in to defend > the poor victim but mental abuse is not taken seriously. Wish > someone could understand. > 3) I feel terrified for my daughter who is 11 yrs and not > totally independent. She has been slow in achieving her milestones. > If I need treatment who is going to take care of her? That is always > the big question I face. The end result is I feel inside a deep and > dark pit and feel miserable. I have been reading the posts and > wanted to say so much to everyone but just couldn't. Hope I will be > back to being myself soon. > Thanks for being there for me ……….Love and prayers for everyone. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 28, 2006 Report Share Posted May 28, 2006 Thank you nne. I already feel so much better because most of you people think it could be a scar tissue.. whew!!!! I feel more confident going for the check up now. Thanks everyone. In all ten years of my survival this is the first time I have felt it is coming back. Hope your son is doing well now. I feel the worst thing we can do for ourselves is get married to a nagging spouse.. eeekkksss and to put up with them when going through bc is sheer hell These support boards are wonderful and makes me feel I am not alone. Thank you everyone... > > Farida, > Try to hang in there. It could be scar tissue. Remember 80% of all lumps are NOT cancer. Breast cancer is not the death sentence it was once thought to be. > > I am sorry your husband is so mean to you. Our one son went through that with his first wife. Usually you hear that men are abusive, well this woman was the one. He would never hit her back or anything. He would leave the house and go for a ride on his motorcycle. They have been divorced approximately 14 and she has been through numerous boyfriends and still can't keep one longer than a few months. So I guess she hasn't changed. > I will keep you and your daughter in my prayers. > Hugs > nne > Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Life > http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html > Check out my other ornaments at > www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.html > Lots of info and gifts at: > www.cancerclub.com > CinDWood Crafts > http://www.cindwoodcrafts.com > Prayers needed .... > > > Some prayers needed please. > 1) I have been ten years NED. But now from past few weeks I > feel a small lump like growth on the operated site. I have never > felt threatened by a recurrence so far but now I fear it and feel at > the bottom of a pit. I have never been on any meds for depression so > far and no doctor has ever suggested it to me. I will go for my > follow up after a gap of four years in June. Hope and pray that they > say it is not back. > 2) My husband has taken my bc very badly and has been very > nasty to me. I haven't been able to get a divorce for various > reasons --- custody of my kids being one of them. He has been away > working in Gulf for three years now but is coming back first week of > June. I dread being with him again. We never get along well. There > has been no physical abuse for me but the mental torment is not very > good to go through and worst being others do not understand my > trauma. When there is physical abuse everyone rushes in to defend > the poor victim but mental abuse is not taken seriously. Wish > someone could understand. > 3) I feel terrified for my daughter who is 11 yrs and not > totally independent. She has been slow in achieving her milestones. > If I need treatment who is going to take care of her? That is always > the big question I face. The end result is I feel inside a deep and > dark pit and feel miserable. I have been reading the posts and > wanted to say so much to everyone but just couldn't. Hope I will be > back to being myself soon. > Thanks for being there for me ....Love and prayers for everyone. > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 28, 2006 Report Share Posted May 28, 2006 I have family but the problem is they don't understand. No one can actually understand the effect of nasty comments. Usually they advice me to ignore him and move on... I am trying. Thanks for the prayers Ruth. In breastcancer2 , " ruthiema36 " wrote: > > Love and prayers coming your way. Do you have any family you can > confide in and count on to help? > Ruth > > > > > Some prayers needed please. > > 1) I have been ten years NED. But now from past few weeks I > > feel a small lump like growth on the operated site. I have never > > felt threatened by a recurrence so far but now I fear it and feel at > > the bottom of a pit. I have never been on any meds for depression so > > far and no doctor has ever suggested it to me. I will go for my > > follow up after a gap of four years in June. Hope and pray that they > > say it is not back. > > 2) My husband has taken my bc very badly and has been very > > nasty to me. I haven't been able to get a divorce for various > > reasons --- custody of my kids being one of them. He has been away > > working in Gulf for three years now but is coming back first week of > > June. I dread being with him again. We never get along well. There > > has been no physical abuse for me but the mental torment is not very > > good to go through and worst being others do not understand my > > trauma. When there is physical abuse everyone rushes in to defend > > the poor victim but mental abuse is not taken seriously. Wish > > someone could understand. > > 3) I feel terrified for my daughter who is 11 yrs and not > > totally independent. She has been slow in achieving her milestones. > > If I need treatment who is going to take care of her? That is always > > the big question I face. The end result is I feel inside a deep and > > dark pit and feel miserable. I have been reading the posts and > > wanted to say so much to everyone but just couldn't. Hope I will be > > back to being myself soon. > > Thanks for being there for me ……….Love and prayers for everyone. > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 28, 2006 Report Share Posted May 28, 2006 I sure hope it is a scar tissue.. Thanks for encouraging words and prayers. I feel better now. > > Farida > > It is good to see you here. You know you are in my prayers all the time. You > need to get the lump checked out-you know it could be many things other than > bc. > > hugs > Pam > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 28, 2006 Report Share Posted May 28, 2006 You brought back the memories of my school days where our nuns would say prayers for us when we hit a rough patch. Thanks Ren. Though I come from a muslim family I went to a school run by St. ph's convent and it was a wonderful experience for me. The best memories of my life belong there... My teachers there were responsible in making me a person I am today. > > Here is my prayer right now. > > I thank you Lord for what you are doing in this household. I thank you Lord > for Farida's husband that he is coming home not like he left. That you have > worked a miracle in him and he knows You now and is delivered from all of that > garbage that he has had. I pray Your mighty protection over this family. I > pray that you give Farida the courage that she has never had before. That you > make her the head and not the tail accordning to Your word. Lord this family > needs a healing and a miracle, and I thank you for it in Jesus name....Amen > > Farida, remember that you are strong and your peace and courage comes from > God. Give it all to him, he is there for you honey. I will praying for you. > > Ren > " A Desire to Inspire " > www.menpausewomentalk.com > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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