Re: SSDI review due Friday & long rant and rave

[Guest guest]

Shirley,

I hope you finally got some rest. Remember we're here to listen when you need to vent.

P.

-- SSDI review due Friday & long rant and rave

I have 6+ pages I have to do. Freaking ridiculous. Anyone have suggestions for me to write? Thanks. I'm doing a bit a day. One part asks if anything has gotten worse since our last correspondence. Oh boy are they ready....lol They know about the MS dx. I got a quick review last year just after my dx. But my severe symptoms come back every 2 weeks instead of 3 months now. They've happened the past 2 weeks in a row this time. I can't do my IV solu-medrol cause our ins is terrible and we can't afford it. Steve had to come pick me up last night. I drove over an hour away Greensburg, IN) from home to help a friend. Vertigo hit BAD and I couldn't drive on the interstate with a speed limit of 65. I could barely do it at 30. I had to go to the next exit. It was too scary sitting on the side of the interstate. I did that. Plus it started sleeting. And earlier I almost got hit by a doe with her 3 friends watching on the sidelines...lol My eyes were hurting at that point and then the deer got my anxiety going and that didn't help the vertigo either. The vertigo hit again today when I was at a friends for a Pampered Chef party. We were going to go out to eat afterwards and then a scrapbook convention. Steve had to come get me after the party. Steve doesn't want me to drive outside of n County. That's not far. Especially since I live on the far westside of n county and a niece and nephew live just over the line 5 minutes away. I have MS meetings outside of n County too. The meetings on Thursday he can't take me to cause he throws darts in a league. He had to leave the firehouse last night to get me. But not until they sent a replacement for him. So I've been causing a lot of trouble lately. Unintentional trouble but it makes me sad, frustrated, pissed off and today so aggrevated and depressing I told Steve I wish I had driven home the 1½ hours and maybe ended this mess. I didn't really mean it. I was doing laundry and I got hot. But all day I've been cold. I got frustrated again cause I went from one extreme to the other and it really makes me sick with symptoms. I couldn't move one leg in front of the other earlier today. I was telling them but they wouldn't go. But I'm not bad enough for a scooter or electic w/c. I tried with our last ins cause it was good, but they said no. I really want to sell my vehicle I think. That way I don't have a way to cause trouble. But then Steve would have to take me everywhere after work. We can't afford it really anyway. My neuro's office isn't calling me back to reschedule his broken appt. So Monday, I'm finding a new neuro. I'm in a bad mood and they really don't want to deal with me right now....lol I will send a personal and confidential letter to the doc and tell him why I'm not coming back. I had an absess on my right breast and of course my primary doc was on vacation. I was able to see one of the other docs. Well Keflex brought on MS symptoms. I called that doc back and spoke with assistant personally and asked for samples of something else incase I have trouble again. She never called back! When I see my primary again I will let him know. If my primary was in he'd take care of me. I can't take much more stress. I'm at the end of my rope. It's almost 4 am and I can't sleep. I took I think it's 5 mgs of Zanaflex, the whole pill which was prescribed. I should be sleepy by now. I will try after I finish this email. I may just be raising by BP and don't feel the need for sleep right now....lol

x0x0x0

Shirley

____________________________________________________ IncrediMail - Email has finally evolved - Click Here

[Guest guest]

Shirley, my last batch of papers I filled out, I let them have it all! Both guns drawn! This is your chance to rant and rave and be heard... but insert a lot of facts and refer to documentation too!

Now, my advice.... STOP driving. I know it's hard and I know it's inconvenient but so is having someone come pick you up and having to fetch a vehicle later. So is hitting something because you didn't see it. So is hurting someone innocent because you had a bad moment. So is a funeral. Steve is going to have to make some sacrifices towards your medical condition too. It's part of being married to a disabled person. Change the dart games or drop them. Life sucks. Move on.

I had agreed with my doc he wouldn't take my license and I would only drive in town. After running a red light and 2 stop signs IN town, I gave it all up. My getting somewhere (anywhere!!) isn't worth a life and I realoized how easily it could happen. It's time for you to realize it too. I cried for days and days over the loss of my "freedom" but now I rejoice in saving someone's life instead. You have to turn it around.

I wouldn't dare say this to you if I didn't love you and care about you AND Steve so please take it the way it's meant. Stop driving Shirls. We don't want to lose you.

Hugs

Christy

SSDI review due Friday & long rant and rave

I have 6+ pages I have to do. Freaking ridiculous. Anyone have suggestions for me to write? Thanks. I'm doing a bit a day. One part asks if anything has gotten worse since our last correspondence. Oh boy are they ready....lol They know about the MS dx. I got a quick review last year just after my dx. But my severe symptoms come back every 2 weeks instead of 3 months now. They've happened the past 2 weeks in a row this time. I can't do my IV solu-medrol cause our ins is terrible and we can't afford it. Steve had to come pick me up last night. I drove over an hour away Greensburg, IN) from home to help a friend. Vertigo hit BAD and I couldn't drive on the interstate with a speed limit of 65. I could barely do it at 30. I had to go to the next exit. It was too scary sitting on the side of the interstate. I did that. Plus it started sleeting. And earlier I almost got hit by a doe with her 3 friends watching on the sidelines...lol My eyes were hurting at that point and then the deer got my anxiety going and that didn't help the vertigo either. The vertigo hit again today when I was at a friends for a Pampered Chef party. We were going to go out to eat afterwards and then a scrapbook convention. Steve had to come get me after the party. Steve doesn't want me to drive outside of n County. That's not far. Especially since I live on the far westside of n county and a niece and nephew live just over the line 5 minutes away. I have MS meetings outside of n County too. The meetings on Thursday he can't take me to cause he throws darts in a league. He had to leave the firehouse last night to get me. But not until they sent a replacement for him. So I've been causing a lot of trouble lately. Unintentional trouble but it makes me sad, frustrated, pissed off and today so aggrevated and depressing I told Steve I wish I had driven home the 1½ hours and maybe ended this mess. I didn't really mean it. I was doing laundry and I got hot. But all day I've been cold. I got frustrated again cause I went from one extreme to the other and it really makes me sick with symptoms. I couldn't move one leg in front of the other earlier today. I was telling them but they wouldn't go. But I'm not bad enough for a scooter or electic w/c. I tried with our last ins cause it was good, but they said no. I really want to sell my vehicle I think. That way I don't have a way to cause trouble. But then Steve would have to take me everywhere after work. We can't afford it really anyway. My neuro's office isn't calling me back to reschedule his broken appt. So Monday, I'm finding a new neuro. I'm in a bad mood and they really don't want to deal with me right now....lol I will send a personal and confidential letter to the doc and tell him why I'm not coming back. I had an absess on my right breast and of course my primary doc was on vacation. I was able to see one of the other docs. Well Keflex brought on MS symptoms. I called that doc back and spoke with assistant personally and asked for samples of something else incase I have trouble again. She never called back! When I see my primary again I will let him know. If my primary was in he'd take care of me. I can't take much more stress. I'm at the end of my rope. It's almost 4 am and I can't sleep. I took I think it's 5 mgs of Zanaflex, the whole pill which was prescribed. I should be sleepy by now. I will try after I finish this email. I may just be raising by BP and don't feel the need for sleep right now....lol

x0x0x0

Shirley

____________________________________________________ IncrediMail - Email has finally evolved - Click Here Please visit our website at:http://ACES_Autoimmune.tripod.com

[Guest guest]

So sorry to hear you're having such a bad time of it, Shirls.

I have a question about the SS reviews--originally when they approved me the

judge recommended a review in one year. A year was up in July and I haven't

heard anything. Does this mean that they just reviewed my medical chart and saw

the on-going problems and med changes without relief, or does this just mean

that they are way behind schedule? If they're behind schedule, I'm hoping they

stay behind schedule until I see the rheumy in Dec.

Shirls--try to relax, it will make life easier.

(((hugs)))

Kathy

[Guest guest]

Well said, Christy.

Living rurally, and having been a home health nurse who tended to take driving

vacations, giving up driving was difficult for me. What made it easier was that

over the years I'd had too many patients who hadn't given up driving when they

should have--I applied the lecture I always gave them to myself. I'm still

hoping that I'll get back to the point where I can safely drive again, but the

inconvenience isn't worth killing someone else or myself. I kept my license,

just in case --hope is always a good thing--but at this point I don't see it

happening soon.

We all love you Shirls--it's time to stop driving.

(((hugs)))

Kathy

[Guest guest]

Thanks ! I got about 6 hours sleep.

Shirley wrote:

Shirley,

I hope you finally got some rest. Remember we're here to listen when you need to vent.

P.

-- SSDI review due Friday & long rant and rave

I have 6+ pages I have to do. Freaking ridiculous. Anyone have suggestions for me to write? Thanks. I'm doing a bit a day. One part asks if anything has gotten worse since our last correspondence. Oh boy are they ready....lol They know about the MS dx. I got a quick review last year just after my dx. But my severe symptoms come back every 2 weeks instead of 3 months now. They've happened the past 2 weeks in a row this time. I can't do my IV solu-medrol cause our ins is terrible and we can't afford it. Steve had to come pick me up last night. I drove over an hour away Greensburg, IN) from home to help a friend. Vertigo hit BAD and I couldn't drive on the interstate with a speed limit of 65. I could barely do it at 30. I had to go to the next exit. It was too scary sitting on the side of the interstate. I did that. Plus it started sleeting. And earlier I almost got

hit by a doe with her 3 friends watching on the sidelines...lol My eyes were hurting at that point and then the deer got my anxiety going and that didn't help the vertigo either. The vertigo hit again today when I was at a friends for a Pampered Chef party. We were going to go out to eat afterwards and then a scrapbook convention. Steve had to come get me after the party. Steve doesn't want me to drive outside of n County. That's not far. Especially since I live on the far westside of n county and a niece and nephew live just over the line 5 minutes away. I have MS meetings outside of n County too. The meetings on Thursday he can't take me to cause he throws darts in a league. He had to leave the firehouse last night to get me. But not until they sent a replacement for him. So I've been causing a lot of trouble lately. Unintentional trouble but it makes me sad, frustrated, pissed off and

today so aggrevated and depressing I told Steve I wish I had driven home the 1½ hours and maybe ended this mess. I didn't really mean it. I was doing laundry and I got hot. But all day I've been cold. I got frustrated again cause I went from one extreme to the other and it really makes me sick with symptoms. I couldn't move one leg in front of the other earlier today. I was telling them but they wouldn't go. But I'm not bad enough for a scooter or electic w/c. I tried with our last ins cause it was good, but they said no. I really want to sell my vehicle I think. That way I don't have a way to cause trouble. But then Steve would have to take me everywhere after work. We can't afford it really anyway. My neuro's office isn't calling me back to reschedule his broken appt. So Monday, I'm finding a new neuro. I'm in a bad mood and they really don't want to deal with me right now....lol I will

send a personal and confidential letter to the doc and tell him why I'm not coming back. I had an absess on my right breast and of course my primary doc was on vacation. I was able to see one of the other docs. Well Keflex brought on MS symptoms. I called that doc back and spoke with assistant personally and asked for samples of something else incase I have trouble again. She never called back! When I see my primary again I will let him know. If my primary was in he'd take care of me. I can't take much more stress. I'm at the end of my rope. It's almost 4 am and I can't sleep. I took I think it's 5 mgs of Zanaflex, the whole pill which was prescribed. I should be sleepy by now. I will try after I finish this email. I may just be raising by BP and don't feel the need for sleep right now....lol

x0x0x0

Shirley

____________________________________________________ IncrediMail - Email has finally evolved - Click Here Please visit our website at:http://ACES_Autoimmune.tripod.com

[Guest guest]

Christy, I know when to stop driving. That's why I called Steve to drive 3 hours. I knew I could hurt someone that's why I called. So don't preach to me about that. I know! And I'm saying that to you cause I love you too....lol I don't mean to be a bitch but I all ready know what you said!!! When I start the day fine and then things change suddenly. So that means I can't leave the house! I don't know if I need my w/c in 5 minutes or not. If I could find a doctor that would treat me things might be better! I'm taking that personally too. I'm going to have to give my w/c back too. It was a rental from our last ins so they'll be calling any day now to get it. So I'm screwed again. I'm not making/having Steve change his life for me. It's not worth it. I've made our lives miserable! Steve has to have a life of his own or he'd really resent me. Caregivers have

to have their own time. I'm not taking that away from him. If I'm miserable I don't tell him all the time. I keep my mouth shut. I can't afford therapy. IN will only help those who have never worked. So forget me Steve makes too much. There's a lot of good in my life I know that. Just right now I'm not seeing much of it. It's cloudy! I can't give up doing things. I still have days I can do things. If I give up now I won't have days I can do things. I'm not ready to totally give up. I just can't go far from home...lol Luckily drove in front of me to guide me so I could get to a safe place.

Thanks for being honest!

x0x0x0

ShirleyChristy wrote:

Shirley, my last batch of papers I filled out, I let them have it all! Both guns drawn! This is your chance to rant and rave and be heard... but insert a lot of facts and refer to documentation too!

Now, my advice.... STOP driving. I know it's hard and I know it's inconvenient but so is having someone come pick you up and having to fetch a vehicle later. So is hitting something because you didn't see it. So is hurting someone innocent because you had a bad moment. So is a funeral. Steve is going to have to make some sacrifices towards your medical condition too. It's part of being married to a disabled person. Change the dart games or drop them. Life sucks. Move on.

I had agreed with my doc he wouldn't take my license and I would only drive in town. After running a red light and 2 stop signs IN town, I gave it all up. My getting somewhere (anywhere!!) isn't worth a life and I realoized how easily it could happen. It's time for you to realize it too. I cried for days and days over the loss of my "freedom" but now I rejoice in saving someone's life instead. You have to turn it around.

I wouldn't dare say this to you if I didn't love you and care about you AND Steve so please take it the way it's meant. Stop driving Shirls. We don't want to lose you.

Hugs

Christy

SSDI review due Friday & long rant and rave

I have 6+ pages I have to do. Freaking ridiculous. Anyone have suggestions for me to write? Thanks. I'm doing a bit a day. One part asks if anything has gotten worse since our last correspondence. Oh boy are they ready....lol They know about the MS dx. I got a quick review last year just after my dx. But my severe symptoms come back every 2 weeks instead of 3 months now. They've happened the past 2 weeks in a row this time. I can't do my IV solu-medrol cause our ins is terrible and we can't afford it. Steve had to come pick me up last night. I drove over an hour away Greensburg, IN) from home to help a friend. Vertigo hit BAD and I couldn't drive on the interstate with a speed limit of 65. I could barely do it at 30. I had to go to the next exit. It was too scary sitting on the side of the interstate. I did that. Plus it started sleeting. And earlier I almost got

hit by a doe with her 3 friends watching on the sidelines...lol My eyes were hurting at that point and then the deer got my anxiety going and that didn't help the vertigo either. The vertigo hit again today when I was at a friends for a Pampered Chef party. We were going to go out to eat afterwards and then a scrapbook convention. Steve had to come get me after the party. Steve doesn't want me to drive outside of n County. That's not far. Especially since I live on the far westside of n county and a niece and nephew live just over the line 5 minutes away. I have MS meetings outside of n County too. The meetings on Thursday he can't take me to cause he throws darts in a league. He had to leave the firehouse last night to get me. But not until they sent a replacement for him. So I've been causing a lot of trouble lately. Unintentional trouble but it makes me sad, frustrated, pissed off and

today so aggrevated and depressing I told Steve I wish I had driven home the 1½ hours and maybe ended this mess. I didn't really mean it. I was doing laundry and I got hot. But all day I've been cold. I got frustrated again cause I went from one extreme to the other and it really makes me sick with symptoms. I couldn't move one leg in front of the other earlier today. I was telling them but they wouldn't go. But I'm not bad enough for a scooter or electic w/c. I tried with our last ins cause it was good, but they said no. I really want to sell my vehicle I think. That way I don't have a way to cause trouble. But then Steve would have to take me everywhere after work. We can't afford it really anyway. My neuro's office isn't calling me back to reschedule his broken appt. So Monday, I'm finding a new neuro. I'm in a bad mood and they really don't want to deal with me right now....lol I will

send a personal and confidential letter to the doc and tell him why I'm not coming back. I had an absess on my right breast and of course my primary doc was on vacation. I was able to see one of the other docs. Well Keflex brought on MS symptoms. I called that doc back and spoke with assistant personally and asked for samples of something else incase I have trouble again. She never called back! When I see my primary again I will let him know. If my primary was in he'd take care of me. I can't take much more stress. I'm at the end of my rope. It's almost 4 am and I can't sleep. I took I think it's 5 mgs of Zanaflex, the whole pill which was prescribed. I should be sleepy by now. I will try after I finish this email. I may just be raising by BP and don't feel the need for sleep right now....lol

x0x0x0

Shirley

____________________________________________________ IncrediMail - Email has finally evolved - Click Here Please visit our website at:http://ACES_Autoimmune.tripod.com

[Guest guest]

Shirley I know exactly what you're talking about and you know I've been there too. Our freedom is the last piece of dignity it seems we have left and when it's being taken away, life looks very bleak indeed. I wish I was there to give you a hug. I know what you mean about not taking Steve's life away too. I feel that same way when I'm having a really bad morning and Ronnie changes his plans and decides not to go fishing. That rips my heart out. I wish I had an answer for you. Or for me. Or for any of us. Face it, we're all in the same boat and there's no good answer to any of it.

Your wheelchair: is it electric or manual? What brand? Insurance sucks. You know what I wonder? If we're having all of these cutbacks in Medicare and they can't make ends meet and too many people are on it, how the hell can they afford to fly a blimp over these football games??????????????????? Who pays for that???

OK, have you checked with your local hospital about a chair? When they get a new one, they sell the older ones. Ours here did anyway. How about the health department. Can they give you any ideas?

I'm just reaching here......... there HAS to be a way! Someone has to have an idea. This sucks.

I'm so sorry you're going through this.

SSDI review due Friday & long rant and rave

I have 6+ pages I have to do. Freaking ridiculous. Anyone have suggestions for me to write? Thanks. I'm doing a bit a day. One part asks if anything has gotten worse since our last correspondence. Oh boy are they ready....lol They know about the MS dx. I got a quick review last year just after my dx. But my severe symptoms come back every 2 weeks instead of 3 months now. They've happened the past 2 weeks in a row this time. I can't do my IV solu-medrol cause our ins is terrible and we can't afford it. Steve had to come pick me up last night. I drove over an hour away Greensburg, IN) from home to help a friend. Vertigo hit BAD and I couldn't drive on the interstate with a speed limit of 65. I could barely do it at 30. I had to go to the next exit. It was too scary sitting on the side of the interstate. I did that. Plus it started sleeting. And earlier I almost got hit by a doe with her 3 friends watching on the sidelines...lol My eyes were hurting at that point and then the deer got my anxiety going and that didn't help the vertigo either. The vertigo hit again today when I was at a friends for a Pampered Chef party. We were going to go out to eat afterwards and then a scrapbook convention. Steve had to come get me after the party. Steve doesn't want me to drive outside of n County. That's not far. Especially since I live on the far westside of n county and a niece and nephew live just over the line 5 minutes away. I have MS meetings outside of n County too. The meetings on Thursday he can't take me to cause he throws darts in a league. He had to leave the firehouse last night to get me. But not until they sent a replacement for him. So I've been causing a lot of trouble lately. Unintentional trouble but it makes me sad, frustrated, pissed off and today so aggrevated and depressing I told Steve I wish I had driven home the 1½ hours and maybe ended this mess. I didn't really mean it. I was doing laundry and I got hot. But all day I've been cold. I got frustrated again cause I went from one extreme to the other and it really makes me sick with symptoms. I couldn't move one leg in front of the other earlier today. I was telling them but they wouldn't go. But I'm not bad enough for a scooter or electic w/c. I tried with our last ins cause it was good, but they said no. I really want to sell my vehicle I think. That way I don't have a way to cause trouble. But then Steve would have to take me everywhere after work. We can't afford it really anyway. My neuro's office isn't calling me back to reschedule his broken appt. So Monday, I'm finding a new neuro. I'm in a bad mood and they really don't want to deal with me right now....lol I will send a personal and confidential letter to the doc and tell him why I'm not coming back. I had an absess on my right breast and of course my primary doc was on vacation. I was able to see one of the other docs. Well Keflex brought on MS symptoms. I called that doc back and spoke with assistant personally and asked for samples of something else incase I have trouble again. She never called back! When I see my primary again I will let him know. If my primary was in he'd take care of me. I can't take much more stress. I'm at the end of my rope. It's almost 4 am and I can't sleep. I took I think it's 5 mgs of Zanaflex, the whole pill which was prescribed. I should be sleepy by now. I will try after I finish this email. I may just be raising by BP and don't feel the need for sleep right now....lol

x0x0x0

Shirley

____________________________________________________ IncrediMail - Email has finally evolved - Click Here Please visit our website at:http://ACES_Autoimmune.tripod.com

[Guest guest]

Around here the AMVets and the Lions and a few other local groups will loan out wheelchairs. The chair is yours to keep as long as you need it, as long as it is returned to them. And you don't have to be a member or anything. Social Services at the hospital should be able to give you some help to find one.

(((hugs)))

Kathy

SSDI review due Friday & long rant and rave

I have 6+ pages I have to do. Freaking ridiculous. Anyone have suggestions for me to write? Thanks. I'm doing a bit a day. One part asks if anything has gotten worse since our last correspondence. Oh boy are they ready....lol They know about the MS dx. I got a quick review last year just after my dx. But my severe symptoms come back every 2 weeks instead of 3 months now. They've happened the past 2 weeks in a row this time. I can't do my IV solu-medrol cause our ins is terrible and we can't afford it. Steve had to come pick me up last night. I drove over an hour away Greensburg, IN) from home to help a friend. Vertigo hit BAD and I couldn't drive on the interstate with a speed limit of 65. I could barely do it at 30. I had to go to the next exit. It was too scary sitting on the side of the interstate. I did that. Plus it started sleeting. And earlier I almost got hit by a doe with her 3 friends watching on the sidelines...lol My eyes were hurting at that point and then the deer got my anxiety going and that didn't help the vertigo either. The vertigo hit again today when I was at a friends for a Pampered Chef party. We were going to go out to eat afterwards and then a scrapbook convention. Steve had to come get me after the party. Steve doesn't want me to drive outside of n County. That's not far. Especially since I live on the far westside of n county and a niece and nephew live just over the line 5 minutes away. I have MS meetings outside of n County too. The meetings on Thursday he can't take me to cause he throws darts in a league. He had to leave the firehouse last night to get me. But not until they sent a replacement for him. So I've been causing a lot of trouble lately. Unintentional trouble but it makes me sad, frustrated, pissed off and today so aggrevated and depressing I told Steve I wish I had driven home the 1½ hours and maybe ended this mess. I didn't really mean it. I was doing laundry and I got hot. But all day I've been cold. I got frustrated again cause I went from one extreme to the other and it really makes me sick with symptoms. I couldn't move one leg in front of the other earlier today. I was telling them but they wouldn't go. But I'm not bad enough for a scooter or electic w/c. I tried with our last ins cause it was good, but they said no. I really want to sell my vehicle I think. That way I don't have a way to cause trouble. But then Steve would have to take me everywhere after work. We can't afford it really anyway. My neuro's office isn't calling me back to reschedule his broken appt. So Monday, I'm finding a new neuro. I'm in a bad mood and they really don't want to deal with me right now....lol I will send a personal and confidential letter to the doc and tell him why I'm not coming back. I had an absess on my right breast and of course my primary doc was on vacation. I was able to see one of the other docs. Well Keflex brought on MS symptoms. I called that doc back and spoke with assistant personally and asked for samples of something else incase I have trouble again. She never called back! When I see my primary again I will let him know. If my primary was in he'd take care of me. I can't take much more stress. I'm at the end of my rope. It's almost 4 am and I can't sleep. I took I think it's 5 mgs of Zanaflex, the whole pill which was prescribed. I should be sleepy by now. I will try after I finish this email. I may just be raising by BP and don't feel the need for sleep right now....lol

x0x0x0

Shirley

____________________________________________________ IncrediMail - Email has finally evolved - Click Here Please visit our website at:http://ACES_Autoimmune.tripod.com