Guest guest Posted July 10, 2004 Report Share Posted July 10, 2004 Hello I am I am 29 and I am 5'2 and weight 268/270 as most of you I battle with being over weight everyday of my life. I haven't written in a very long time because of life and just reading and learning. I am so frustrated with my self. I had been on the Akins diet for 4 month about and I have lost about 20 pounds or so and my willpower was strong and I was refusing to go off my eating style because I have eaten enough crap for three people's entire life spans. Until last weekend when I just had one bite of yummy carbs I believe it was… I can't even remember but now… I am crazy eating everything I can. I am really cracked it is like the carb monster hit me and I have to have a hit of carbohydrates. I have never noticed my addiction so bad in my life. Maybe now I am so aware of my additions and really know how they can control my life. It is so exhausting to live like this. It is tough to fight off the desire to eat. I like chips and fries and the smell can make me not stop thinking about consuming them. Salty/fried carbs are more of a weakness than sweet stuff because sweet stuff I could get totally sugar free with no carbs. I want a ruin Y gastro by-pass surgery but I know from being a part of a strong support system for my best friend and going to as many meetings as I could with her that I need to try overcome or control that mental hunger that a lot of us suffer with before I go for it. I also have no insurance because of my job; it is more money a week then some of my bills to live. I guess I am wishing for a miracle for me to be cured of all this war in my head. My body is suffering from me being this way physically as mentally. It is hard being 29 and hating the thought of standing because my feet hurt so bad because of torn ligaments and bone bruising from falls. Now I guess I am just bitching so Thank-you so much everyone for just listening to me caring on about me and my crab that I know everyone here just about deals with too on a daily bases. I just needed to vent hoping for relief of my mentally thoughts of hopelessness. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 11, 2004 Report Share Posted July 11, 2004 , Do you want to change your life? You might as well go all the way. Change jobs, to one that has insurance. Stick it out another year, then go in for the surgery. You will not crave food, much less carbs for a good period of time - long enough to get over the cravings. Then, if you do cheat, you will not like the outcome and decide it isn't worth it! That is the best advice I can give; but it is never hopeless. Janet > Hello I am > I am 29 and I am 5'2 and weight 268/270 as most of you I battle > with > being over weight everyday of my life. I am so > frustrated with my self. Until > last > weekend when I just had one bite of yummy carbs I believe it was… > I > can't even remember but now… I am crazy eating everything I > can. I > am really cracked it is like the carb monster hit me and I have to > have a hit of carbohydrates. . I > want a ruin Y gastro by-pass surgery > I also have no insurance because of my job. I guess I am wishing for a miracle > I just needed to vent hoping > for relief of my mentally thoughts of hopelessness. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 12, 2004 Report Share Posted July 12, 2004 Thank you for your words. I am currently looking for a job that offers insurance at a better weekly rate. I live in a small town and it is hard to find such jobs but I will keep my hopes up. I guess the word hopelessness was a very harsh word to use. I really should have used a better word like, disappointed. But I am actually doing a little bit better today. I am trying not to be too hard on myself but it is so hard. With this surgery does it really help with the cravings? I am so afraid I will want to eat the bad stuff. But I actually know it would totally hurt me physically and make me sick so I might not… lol a bit of a out loud argument with myself here…lol have a good day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 12, 2004 Report Share Posted July 12, 2004 I am 31 years old and 5'3 " . Pre-surgery I weighed 261 and now, 4 months post-op, I weigh 182. I feel so much better now that I have lost almost 80 pounds. I can run/walk 2 miles in 30 minutes and do things I couldn't even think about doing any more. I was so self-conscious and I was always on a diet. Feel free to vent any time. We've all been there. in Delaware Lap RNY 3/10/04 261/182/125 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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