hysterectomy??

[Guest guest]

Hey there

Yesterday I had my appt with the gyn, I was all ready to start my Lupron, they were even going to start it yesterday. She tells me I need to take additional calcium, and I was like "Oh, that's OK, I already take 2000 mg a day and Miacalcin". She was like "Oh, what's that for?"... "The Osteoporosis".... "we can't do Lupron when you have already been diagnosed with Osteoporosis."

She suggested "Taking it all out" I have been battling over this decision for years and each time they toss it out there, I'm like "no way, I want more kids!"

Greg was there with me, and I asked "Really, what are my chances of being able to have another kid?" And she said they could technically get me pregnant, but would it be nice? She said it would be "Hell times the hell you had with the first pregnancy, or worse. And do we recommend it? NO." I asked about my other options -- continue with the pain and problems or the hysterectomy -- so I asked about the recovery and all that and we left with all this in mind. In the meantime, she is going to check with other doctors and tell them my situation and see if maybe someone could say "OK, give the Lupron one more try." She wants me to think about the hysterectomy and have an idea by the time she calls me this week with Lupron info.

This still just does not seem right to me. I want more kids. So does Greg. We even have names picked out! I know that's really jumping too far ahead, but the reason I didn't have my tubes tied back after the first rough pregnancy was so that I could do it again. That's the reason I didn't have the hysterectomy 2 years ago when they recommended it for the endometriosis etc and did the Lupron then.

I know a lot of you have mentioned having a hysterectomy, can some of you tell me of the good/bad things, from a personal standpoint. I know I can go and Google it, but hearing it from real people is part of why we are all here.

Thanks so much!Hugs

Chell

[Guest guest]

Hi Chell, I am one of those who have written to you about this before. What a difficult thing to go through. I know from having been there. I had an ovarian disease which made the walls of my ovaries so thick that I couldn't ovulate. I had two surgeries called ovarian wedge resection. This was all in the early 70's. First baby was no problem I got pregnant on my own and had a fairly easy pregnancy. I had some spotting every month when it was time for my period, but our son was born healthy. Then the miscarriages started and the difficulty getting pregnant and the surgeries. I took fertility pills and was artificially inseminated several times. Finally in May of 1975 I gave birth to a very very frail little boy who was born almost 7 weeks early. Good doctors, a lot of love and prayer (not necessarily in that order) saw this boy through. He is now 6'3" tall and around 230lbs, married and delightfully happy.

Through the ordeal of trying to get pregnant, etc. I would get so very tired of people saying, "You should be grateful for the one you have" - and then "You should be grateful for the two you have." I wanted to scream obscenities at them. Chell, we had names picked out too and a whole lot of love to give.

My hubby and I saw three fertility specialists. (Note: I did not have Lupus at this time) To shorten the story, I ended up with my 6th miscarriage and the three doctors telling me that I needed a hysterectomy. I had started to flow heavily every month to the point of hemorrhage. Doctors kept telling me to have surgery, but I wanted another child and insisted we kept trying. Chell, it almost cost me my life. I hemorrhaged one month and had my hubby not come home for lunch, I just don't know. When the surgeon removed my uterus it tore and I hemorrhaged so bad they had to find the bleeders, etc., etc. and close me up. The doctor wasn't able to remove the vaginal side of my cervix. Great - had no uterus or ovaries, but still had to have a pap test.

Now I have had all these years to think about not having the number of children we wanted. Not too many years ago our oldest said something he thought was funny, but that I took to heart. He said, "What God didn't give you in quantity he made up with in quality." So, were we better parents because of just the two children? Or, could we have been just as good parents with 3 or 4 children? I don't know. I do know that my two sons were much better off having me alive to raise them than dead trying to have more....and that's where I was headed.

Again - each of us is different. This decision can only be made by you and your husband. Just know this - you have done your part. You didn't say right off "OK, take it all out." You are a gutsy lady. Please don't forget that, and don't ever feel like a failure or that you let someone down.

Having a hysterectomy is major surgery, so isn't fun, but it's doable. The ONLY thing I can think of that may be of real concern to you is "Do I take hormone replacement or not." Your Doctors would help you with this. Then there is the emotional part of it. No matter what anyone says, it is having part of who you are taken from you. I had the support of a wonderful husband to see me through.

I wish I could REALLY help you. I truly know exactly what you are going through. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Please don't hesitate to contact me at any time.

Hugs - a B. one of the moderators

hysterectomy??

Hey there

Yesterday I had my appt with the gyn, I was all ready to start my Lupron, they were even going to start it yesterday. She tells me I need to take additional calcium, and I was like "Oh, that's OK, I already take 2000 mg a day and Miacalcin". She was like "Oh, what's that for?"... "The Osteoporosis".... "we can't do Lupron when you have already been diagnosed with Osteoporosis."

She suggested "Taking it all out" I have been battling over this decision for years and each time they toss it out there, I'm like "no way, I want more kids!"

Greg was there with me, and I asked "Really, what are my chances of being able to have another kid?" And she said they could technically get me pregnant, but would it be nice? She said it would be "Hell times the hell you had with the first pregnancy, or worse. And do we recommend it? NO." I asked about my other options -- continue with the pain and problems or the hysterectomy -- so I asked about the recovery and all that and we left with all this in mind. In the meantime, she is going to check with other doctors and tell them my situation and see if maybe someone could say "OK, give the Lupron one more try." She wants me to think about the hysterectomy and have an idea by the time she calls me this week with Lupron info.

This still just does not seem right to me. I want more kids. So does Greg. We even have names picked out! I know that's really jumping too far ahead, but the reason I didn't have my tubes tied back after the first rough pregnancy was so that I could do it again. That's the reason I didn't have the hysterectomy 2 years ago when they recommended it for the endometriosis etc and did the Lupron then.

I know a lot of you have mentioned having a hysterectomy, can some of you tell me of the good/bad things, from a personal standpoint. I know I can go and Google it, but hearing it from real people is part of why we are all here.

Thanks so much!Hugs

Chell"The LUPIES Store" Come check out our store...http://www.cafepress.com/thelupies"The LUPIES Web Page"http://www.itzarion.com/lupusgroup.html"The LUPIES online photo albums!" Check out what your fellow Lupies look like...http://www.picturetrail.com/gallery/view?username=lupies

[Guest guest]

Hi Chell, When you have a hysterectomy there ends up being an open space in the pelvic region where the uterus used to live. This open space leaves the bladder with an opportunity to sag a little. I didn't have any bowel or bladder problems prior to my hysterectomy. My bowel problems have nothing to do with my hysterectomy, but the bladder problems I did were aggravated by having that open space. I started to have trouble with controlling my bladder when I coughed, sneezed, etc. I ended up having a 'vaginal sling' procedure about 3 years or so ago. It has worked miracles and I haven't had trouble since.

I'm so glad I can be of some assistance. Don't hesitate at all to contact me.

Re: hysterectomy??

Thanks a, and everyone else that replied.

Greg and I both read this several times and it gave us a lot to think about. I do have people telling me I am selfish because I already have two kids and I should be grateful for them, and because a lot of women can't even do that. I can't see how this makes me selfish, not in my eyes. Ever since I was little I wanted three, that was my magical number. I have tons of "selfish" reasons, and maybe some not so selfish ones, like Greg is the last, absolute last, child in his family. He's an only child, and really has no cousins. His mom went through similar things as me and wanted another child, and never was able to. That plays a small part...

Anyway... I do have this long list of autoimmune disorders that seem to start popping their heads up every time I mention having another child. So I know it's not feasible to even consider doing it now. And who knows what things will be like in a year or two. Hopefully, financially things will be better, hopefully, health-wise things will be better. I'm on disability and who knows how they'd take me getting pregnant? ("If she can get pregnant, why can't she work?" -- who knows what might happen? I remember a few years ago on 60 Minutes or something, a woman with MS or something wanted to get pregnant. MS is one of the dx's my docs have been throwing around for 2 years. Well, she was on disability and Medicare etc and they felt that a pregnancy wouldn't be good for her and the SYSTEM was actually fighting her on it!!!) So I'm going to try putting off my decision a bit longer. Greg is going back to school for MRI tech and maybe our income won't need to depend so much on my disability in two or so years....

But then, in April, my SSD Medicare kicks in and I am actually losing my state assistance at the end of February because of an increase in our income. So, from that stand-point, while I've got this great insurance, I should do it. I'm going to have that lapse in some of my benefits, not all of them, I'm going to pick up that Adult Basic, but it sure isn't medical assistance ;-)

One thing that you reiterated that I have thought about many times is "What if I do get pregnant and I can't maintain the pregnancy?" That is so huge. And then that spirit in me screams "What if you do get pregnant and you can do it?!!" I can't help but wonder if it's more than just MY spirit saying that....

So thank you so much for your letter a. You really have given me a lot more things, concrete things, to think about. They were mostly things I had already thought of, but hearing it from someone that already went through it really really helped. Thank you! *hugs*

I do want to find out more about how a hysterectomy might help some other problems, like, might it help some of my bowel and bladder problems? Probably not, but good to ask ;-)

Anyway, I think I'm going to try to make some of my pictures smaller so I can send them to the group. My sister has an 11 month old that is just the world to me and I'd like to share a pic of us, as well as some with me and my girls

Thanks again!!*hugs*Chell

[Guest guest]

Hi Chell, When you have a hysterectomy there ends up being an open space in the pelvic region where the uterus used to live. This open space leaves the bladder with an opportunity to sag a little. I didn't have any bowel or bladder problems prior to my hysterectomy. My bowel problems have nothing to do with my hysterectomy, but the bladder problems I did were aggravated by having that open space. I started to have trouble with controlling my bladder when I coughed, sneezed, etc. I ended up having a 'vaginal sling' procedure about 3 years or so ago. It has worked miracles and I haven't had trouble since.

I'm so glad I can be of some assistance. Don't hesitate at all to contact me.

Re: hysterectomy??

Thanks a, and everyone else that replied.

Greg and I both read this several times and it gave us a lot to think about. I do have people telling me I am selfish because I already have two kids and I should be grateful for them, and because a lot of women can't even do that. I can't see how this makes me selfish, not in my eyes. Ever since I was little I wanted three, that was my magical number. I have tons of "selfish" reasons, and maybe some not so selfish ones, like Greg is the last, absolute last, child in his family. He's an only child, and really has no cousins. His mom went through similar things as me and wanted another child, and never was able to. That plays a small part...

Anyway... I do have this long list of autoimmune disorders that seem to start popping their heads up every time I mention having another child. So I know it's not feasible to even consider doing it now. And who knows what things will be like in a year or two. Hopefully, financially things will be better, hopefully, health-wise things will be better. I'm on disability and who knows how they'd take me getting pregnant? ("If she can get pregnant, why can't she work?" -- who knows what might happen? I remember a few years ago on 60 Minutes or something, a woman with MS or something wanted to get pregnant. MS is one of the dx's my docs have been throwing around for 2 years. Well, she was on disability and Medicare etc and they felt that a pregnancy wouldn't be good for her and the SYSTEM was actually fighting her on it!!!) So I'm going to try putting off my decision a bit longer. Greg is going back to school for MRI tech and maybe our income won't need to depend so much on my disability in two or so years....

But then, in April, my SSD Medicare kicks in and I am actually losing my state assistance at the end of February because of an increase in our income. So, from that stand-point, while I've got this great insurance, I should do it. I'm going to have that lapse in some of my benefits, not all of them, I'm going to pick up that Adult Basic, but it sure isn't medical assistance ;-)

One thing that you reiterated that I have thought about many times is "What if I do get pregnant and I can't maintain the pregnancy?" That is so huge. And then that spirit in me screams "What if you do get pregnant and you can do it?!!" I can't help but wonder if it's more than just MY spirit saying that....

So thank you so much for your letter a. You really have given me a lot more things, concrete things, to think about. They were mostly things I had already thought of, but hearing it from someone that already went through it really really helped. Thank you! *hugs*

I do want to find out more about how a hysterectomy might help some other problems, like, might it help some of my bowel and bladder problems? Probably not, but good to ask ;-)

Anyway, I think I'm going to try to make some of my pictures smaller so I can send them to the group. My sister has an 11 month old that is just the world to me and I'd like to share a pic of us, as well as some with me and my girls

Thanks again!!*hugs*Chell

[Guest guest]

Hi Chell, When you have a hysterectomy there ends up being an open space in the pelvic region where the uterus used to live. This open space leaves the bladder with an opportunity to sag a little. I didn't have any bowel or bladder problems prior to my hysterectomy. My bowel problems have nothing to do with my hysterectomy, but the bladder problems I did were aggravated by having that open space. I started to have trouble with controlling my bladder when I coughed, sneezed, etc. I ended up having a 'vaginal sling' procedure about 3 years or so ago. It has worked miracles and I haven't had trouble since.

I'm so glad I can be of some assistance. Don't hesitate at all to contact me.

Re: hysterectomy??

Thanks a, and everyone else that replied.

Greg and I both read this several times and it gave us a lot to think about. I do have people telling me I am selfish because I already have two kids and I should be grateful for them, and because a lot of women can't even do that. I can't see how this makes me selfish, not in my eyes. Ever since I was little I wanted three, that was my magical number. I have tons of "selfish" reasons, and maybe some not so selfish ones, like Greg is the last, absolute last, child in his family. He's an only child, and really has no cousins. His mom went through similar things as me and wanted another child, and never was able to. That plays a small part...

Anyway... I do have this long list of autoimmune disorders that seem to start popping their heads up every time I mention having another child. So I know it's not feasible to even consider doing it now. And who knows what things will be like in a year or two. Hopefully, financially things will be better, hopefully, health-wise things will be better. I'm on disability and who knows how they'd take me getting pregnant? ("If she can get pregnant, why can't she work?" -- who knows what might happen? I remember a few years ago on 60 Minutes or something, a woman with MS or something wanted to get pregnant. MS is one of the dx's my docs have been throwing around for 2 years. Well, she was on disability and Medicare etc and they felt that a pregnancy wouldn't be good for her and the SYSTEM was actually fighting her on it!!!) So I'm going to try putting off my decision a bit longer. Greg is going back to school for MRI tech and maybe our income won't need to depend so much on my disability in two or so years....

But then, in April, my SSD Medicare kicks in and I am actually losing my state assistance at the end of February because of an increase in our income. So, from that stand-point, while I've got this great insurance, I should do it. I'm going to have that lapse in some of my benefits, not all of them, I'm going to pick up that Adult Basic, but it sure isn't medical assistance ;-)

One thing that you reiterated that I have thought about many times is "What if I do get pregnant and I can't maintain the pregnancy?" That is so huge. And then that spirit in me screams "What if you do get pregnant and you can do it?!!" I can't help but wonder if it's more than just MY spirit saying that....

So thank you so much for your letter a. You really have given me a lot more things, concrete things, to think about. They were mostly things I had already thought of, but hearing it from someone that already went through it really really helped. Thank you! *hugs*

I do want to find out more about how a hysterectomy might help some other problems, like, might it help some of my bowel and bladder problems? Probably not, but good to ask ;-)

Anyway, I think I'm going to try to make some of my pictures smaller so I can send them to the group. My sister has an 11 month old that is just the world to me and I'd like to share a pic of us, as well as some with me and my girls

Thanks again!!*hugs*Chell