Re: Off topic: Stupid cat story

[Guest guest]

> Of course, I still love Herky even though she is hyperactive,

> neurotic, cruel, loud, selfish, destructive and occasionally

> malodorous. And those are her good qualities.

ROTFL! Thanks for the story. Your Herky sounds like my .

lives on our bed 24/7, a bed cat. She is very sexy, with blue eyes, a

soft downy coat--a godess among cats-- and is very affectionate.

She's has rapid mood swings tho and turns into a murderous bitch

without warning. She hates our boy cats, who are in love with her of

course. Then there's The Colonel, a Tabby who lost a leg and a tail

in Vietnam. We call him Stubby. Stubby often curls up and goes to

sleep with our boxer. It's very sweet watching a cat and dog sleep

together. :-)

Jim

[Guest guest]

> Of course, I still love Herky even though she is hyperactive,

> neurotic, cruel, loud, selfish, destructive and occasionally

> malodorous. And those are her good qualities.

ROTFL! Thanks for the story. Your Herky sounds like my .

lives on our bed 24/7, a bed cat. She is very sexy, with blue eyes, a

soft downy coat--a godess among cats-- and is very affectionate.

She's has rapid mood swings tho and turns into a murderous bitch

without warning. She hates our boy cats, who are in love with her of

course. Then there's The Colonel, a Tabby who lost a leg and a tail

in Vietnam. We call him Stubby. Stubby often curls up and goes to

sleep with our boxer. It's very sweet watching a cat and dog sleep

together. :-)

Jim

[Guest guest]

> Of course, I still love Herky even though she is hyperactive,

> neurotic, cruel, loud, selfish, destructive and occasionally

> malodorous. And those are her good qualities.

ROTFL! Thanks for the story. Your Herky sounds like my .

lives on our bed 24/7, a bed cat. She is very sexy, with blue eyes, a

soft downy coat--a godess among cats-- and is very affectionate.

She's has rapid mood swings tho and turns into a murderous bitch

without warning. She hates our boy cats, who are in love with her of

course. Then there's The Colonel, a Tabby who lost a leg and a tail

in Vietnam. We call him Stubby. Stubby often curls up and goes to

sleep with our boxer. It's very sweet watching a cat and dog sleep

together. :-)

Jim

[Guest guest]

> I posted this in another forum as well. I thought I would try to

> throw everyone here off-topic also.

>

> It's been far too long since the cat owners in this forum started a

> long thread of inane stories about stupid annoying things their

> kitties have done. So I'm hoping to start one with this anecdote,

all

> true, about my cat Herky!

<snipped for brevity>

<laughs> As I was reading this, I thought about what the response

would have been if you had told this story at an AA meeting. I'm

willing to bet that someone would have told you (straight-faced)

after the meeting that Herky's little stunt was just your HP's way of

telling you that you don't belong in a relationship, and that he let

the the hearing aid dry out and " heal itself " so you wouldn't miss

hearing anything important at meetings...<rolls eyes> C'mon, you can

just see it, can't you?

Glad the hearing aid dried out okay, though!

[Guest guest]

> I posted this in another forum as well. I thought I would try to

> throw everyone here off-topic also.

>

> It's been far too long since the cat owners in this forum started a

> long thread of inane stories about stupid annoying things their

> kitties have done. So I'm hoping to start one with this anecdote,

all

> true, about my cat Herky!

<snipped for brevity>

<laughs> As I was reading this, I thought about what the response

would have been if you had told this story at an AA meeting. I'm

willing to bet that someone would have told you (straight-faced)

after the meeting that Herky's little stunt was just your HP's way of

telling you that you don't belong in a relationship, and that he let

the the hearing aid dry out and " heal itself " so you wouldn't miss

hearing anything important at meetings...<rolls eyes> C'mon, you can

just see it, can't you?

Glad the hearing aid dried out okay, though!

[Guest guest]

> I posted this in another forum as well. I thought I would try to

> throw everyone here off-topic also.

>

> It's been far too long since the cat owners in this forum started a

> long thread of inane stories about stupid annoying things their

> kitties have done. So I'm hoping to start one with this anecdote,

all

> true, about my cat Herky!

<snipped for brevity>

<laughs> As I was reading this, I thought about what the response

would have been if you had told this story at an AA meeting. I'm

willing to bet that someone would have told you (straight-faced)

after the meeting that Herky's little stunt was just your HP's way of

telling you that you don't belong in a relationship, and that he let

the the hearing aid dry out and " heal itself " so you wouldn't miss

hearing anything important at meetings...<rolls eyes> C'mon, you can

just see it, can't you?

Glad the hearing aid dried out okay, though!

[Guest guest]

Cats have been proven dangerous to mental health. This sad story

happens every day, all across the country...

http://www.theonion.com/onion3702/cats_miss_woman.html

[Guest guest]

Cats have been proven dangerous to mental health. This sad story

happens every day, all across the country...

http://www.theonion.com/onion3702/cats_miss_woman.html

[Guest guest]

Cats have been proven dangerous to mental health. This sad story

happens every day, all across the country...

http://www.theonion.com/onion3702/cats_miss_woman.html

[Guest guest]

Well, not really humourous, but ironic enough... I still look on the

reaction to a " catanecdote " I told in an AA meeting as one of those

defining moments in my declining relationship with the groupers <G>.

I remember remarking that my cats were the only thing I really valued

at the end of my drinking. To wit someone observed (the loud whisper

technique) " Poor cats " . I later asked this " expert " what she meant. I

think the gist was that *all* " alcoholics " had to be animal abusers.

Certainly a fair(er) observation was that my outgoings (then) seemed

to split 3-ways (booze, ciggies and cat food! - They (and I) slept a

lot too. lol. Fortunately only the latter expense now remains - And

also my (now 15 y.o.) cats - And for THEM I can say I'm grateful...

I always have a sneaking suspicion there mightn't be many successful

AA's who get on well with cats. That's just a personal prejudice :-)

Mack

> > I posted this in another forum as well. I thought I would try to

> > throw everyone here off-topic also.

> <laughs> As I was reading this, I thought about what the response

> would have been if you had told this story at an AA meeting. I'm

[Guest guest]

Well, not really humourous, but ironic enough... I still look on the

reaction to a " catanecdote " I told in an AA meeting as one of those

defining moments in my declining relationship with the groupers <G>.

I remember remarking that my cats were the only thing I really valued

at the end of my drinking. To wit someone observed (the loud whisper

technique) " Poor cats " . I later asked this " expert " what she meant. I

think the gist was that *all* " alcoholics " had to be animal abusers.

Certainly a fair(er) observation was that my outgoings (then) seemed

to split 3-ways (booze, ciggies and cat food! - They (and I) slept a

lot too. lol. Fortunately only the latter expense now remains - And

also my (now 15 y.o.) cats - And for THEM I can say I'm grateful...

I always have a sneaking suspicion there mightn't be many successful

AA's who get on well with cats. That's just a personal prejudice :-)

Mack

> > I posted this in another forum as well. I thought I would try to

> > throw everyone here off-topic also.

> <laughs> As I was reading this, I thought about what the response

> would have been if you had told this story at an AA meeting. I'm

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 2/1/01 7:02:07 PM Pacific Standard Time, arroyoh@...

writes:

<< My dog cornered what I thought was a cat the other day. To my surprise and

terror it was an opossum. Those damn things have got to be some of the

scariest looking critters put on this earth. So while my dog is trying to >>

My tabby, an ambitious jock, brought home a gift for me one day when he

somehow escaped to the outside world. It was a mauled baby opossum. On the

living room floor. I thought of calling 911, but eventually calmed down.

When we are talking courage, it may be of the variety that suggests that one

has to PERSONALLY pick up a thing that was alive and dispose of it. Every

sensibility reigning was appalled.

I look at my cat and try to understand him bringing me such gifts. Piper.

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 2/1/01 7:02:07 PM Pacific Standard Time, arroyoh@...

writes:

<< My dog cornered what I thought was a cat the other day. To my surprise and

terror it was an opossum. Those damn things have got to be some of the

scariest looking critters put on this earth. So while my dog is trying to >>

My tabby, an ambitious jock, brought home a gift for me one day when he

somehow escaped to the outside world. It was a mauled baby opossum. On the

living room floor. I thought of calling 911, but eventually calmed down.

When we are talking courage, it may be of the variety that suggests that one

has to PERSONALLY pick up a thing that was alive and dispose of it. Every

sensibility reigning was appalled.

I look at my cat and try to understand him bringing me such gifts. Piper.

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 2/1/01 7:02:07 PM Pacific Standard Time, arroyoh@...

writes:

<< My dog cornered what I thought was a cat the other day. To my surprise and

terror it was an opossum. Those damn things have got to be some of the

scariest looking critters put on this earth. So while my dog is trying to >>

My tabby, an ambitious jock, brought home a gift for me one day when he

somehow escaped to the outside world. It was a mauled baby opossum. On the

living room floor. I thought of calling 911, but eventually calmed down.

When we are talking courage, it may be of the variety that suggests that one

has to PERSONALLY pick up a thing that was alive and dispose of it. Every

sensibility reigning was appalled.

I look at my cat and try to understand him bringing me such gifts. Piper.

[Guest guest]

My dog cornered what I thought was a cat the other day. To my surprise and

terror it was an opossum. Those damn things have got to be some of the

scariest looking critters put on this earth. So while my dog is trying to

worry it, it's dripping venomous looking saliva from it's enormous fangish

looking teeth and making the hissing sound from what I'm sure was opossum

hell. Apparently this one didn't know how to play dead. Which is a good

thing for both my dog and it really.

Anyway I'm trying to grab my dog and he's trying to latch onto the meanest

hugest panda colored ratish demon eyed venomous saliva dripping from it's

enormous fangish looking teeth opossum trying not to get bit by either when

I realized hey I'm the human with two perfectly good shoes on my feet and

while I toy with the idea of booting my mutt or tossing a shoe at his head.

I quickly (well sort of anyway) abandoned that idea and keeping in mind my

dog has got to be one of the more idiotic examples of k9dom I've ever seen I

managed to convince him that there was something more interesting then a

decidedly not quite so defenseless though interesting looking (to a dog)

opossum just around the corner.

Fortunately for me I prevailed but only because I'm cursed with a really

stupid dog that I kinda sorta really like enough for him not to get bit by

the critter on furlough from hell.

> Off topic: Stupid cat story

>

>

>I posted this in another forum as well. I thought I would try to

>throw everyone here off-topic also.

>

[Guest guest]

My dog cornered what I thought was a cat the other day. To my surprise and

terror it was an opossum. Those damn things have got to be some of the

scariest looking critters put on this earth. So while my dog is trying to

worry it, it's dripping venomous looking saliva from it's enormous fangish

looking teeth and making the hissing sound from what I'm sure was opossum

hell. Apparently this one didn't know how to play dead. Which is a good

thing for both my dog and it really.

Anyway I'm trying to grab my dog and he's trying to latch onto the meanest

hugest panda colored ratish demon eyed venomous saliva dripping from it's

enormous fangish looking teeth opossum trying not to get bit by either when

I realized hey I'm the human with two perfectly good shoes on my feet and

while I toy with the idea of booting my mutt or tossing a shoe at his head.

I quickly (well sort of anyway) abandoned that idea and keeping in mind my

dog has got to be one of the more idiotic examples of k9dom I've ever seen I

managed to convince him that there was something more interesting then a

decidedly not quite so defenseless though interesting looking (to a dog)

opossum just around the corner.

Fortunately for me I prevailed but only because I'm cursed with a really

stupid dog that I kinda sorta really like enough for him not to get bit by

the critter on furlough from hell.

> Off topic: Stupid cat story

>

>

>I posted this in another forum as well. I thought I would try to

>throw everyone here off-topic also.

>

[Guest guest]

My dog cornered what I thought was a cat the other day. To my surprise and

terror it was an opossum. Those damn things have got to be some of the

scariest looking critters put on this earth. So while my dog is trying to

worry it, it's dripping venomous looking saliva from it's enormous fangish

looking teeth and making the hissing sound from what I'm sure was opossum

hell. Apparently this one didn't know how to play dead. Which is a good

thing for both my dog and it really.

Anyway I'm trying to grab my dog and he's trying to latch onto the meanest

hugest panda colored ratish demon eyed venomous saliva dripping from it's

enormous fangish looking teeth opossum trying not to get bit by either when

I realized hey I'm the human with two perfectly good shoes on my feet and

while I toy with the idea of booting my mutt or tossing a shoe at his head.

I quickly (well sort of anyway) abandoned that idea and keeping in mind my

dog has got to be one of the more idiotic examples of k9dom I've ever seen I

managed to convince him that there was something more interesting then a

decidedly not quite so defenseless though interesting looking (to a dog)

opossum just around the corner.

Fortunately for me I prevailed but only because I'm cursed with a really

stupid dog that I kinda sorta really like enough for him not to get bit by

the critter on furlough from hell.

> Off topic: Stupid cat story

>

>

>I posted this in another forum as well. I thought I would try to

>throw everyone here off-topic also.

>

[Guest guest]

> <laughs> As I was reading this, I thought about what the response

> would have been if you had told this story at an AA meeting. I'm

> willing to bet that someone would have told you (straight-faced)

> after the meeting that Herky's little stunt was just your HP's way

of

> telling you that you don't belong in a relationship, and that he

let

> the the hearing aid dry out and " heal itself " so you wouldn't miss

> hearing anything important at meetings...<rolls eyes> C'mon, you

can

> just see it, can't you?

>

> Glad the hearing aid dried out okay, though!

As a matter of fact, the idea occurred to me that maybe Herky knows

something about this woman and doesn't want me mixed up with her, or

perhaps Herky was divinely or satanically inspired when she kicked my

hearing aid into the water. And yes, it's a miracle that it's still

working. I tell everybody it's not supposed to get wet because it's a

HEARING aid not a HERRING aid.

[Guest guest]

> <laughs> As I was reading this, I thought about what the response

> would have been if you had told this story at an AA meeting. I'm

> willing to bet that someone would have told you (straight-faced)

> after the meeting that Herky's little stunt was just your HP's way

of

> telling you that you don't belong in a relationship, and that he

let

> the the hearing aid dry out and " heal itself " so you wouldn't miss

> hearing anything important at meetings...<rolls eyes> C'mon, you

can

> just see it, can't you?

>

> Glad the hearing aid dried out okay, though!

As a matter of fact, the idea occurred to me that maybe Herky knows

something about this woman and doesn't want me mixed up with her, or

perhaps Herky was divinely or satanically inspired when she kicked my

hearing aid into the water. And yes, it's a miracle that it's still

working. I tell everybody it's not supposed to get wet because it's a

HEARING aid not a HERRING aid.

[Guest guest]

> <laughs> As I was reading this, I thought about what the response

> would have been if you had told this story at an AA meeting. I'm

> willing to bet that someone would have told you (straight-faced)

> after the meeting that Herky's little stunt was just your HP's way

of

> telling you that you don't belong in a relationship, and that he

let

> the the hearing aid dry out and " heal itself " so you wouldn't miss

> hearing anything important at meetings...<rolls eyes> C'mon, you

can

> just see it, can't you?

>

> Glad the hearing aid dried out okay, though!

As a matter of fact, the idea occurred to me that maybe Herky knows

something about this woman and doesn't want me mixed up with her, or

perhaps Herky was divinely or satanically inspired when she kicked my

hearing aid into the water. And yes, it's a miracle that it's still

working. I tell everybody it's not supposed to get wet because it's a

HEARING aid not a HERRING aid.

[Guest guest]

I tell you, there's nothing worse than trying to do a shot of heroin

with a pesky cat hanging around. First they try to knock the lump of

dope into the carpet where you'll never find it. Then they try to

upset the spoon with the liquid in it. Then they bat at the needle

when you're trying to hit a vein. I got in the habit of squirting

them with a syringe full of water if they started hanging around

while I was cooking up a fix.

> > > I posted this in another forum as well. I thought I would try

to

> > > throw everyone here off-topic also.

> > <laughs> As I was reading this, I thought about what the

response

> > would have been if you had told this story at an AA meeting. I'm

[Guest guest]

My god, I'm almost THIS neurotic about my cats. But I don't care what

anyone says, some cats ARE emotionally needy.

> Cats have been proven dangerous to mental health. This sad story

> happens every day, all across the country...

>

> http://www.theonion.com/onion3702/cats_miss_woman.html

[Guest guest]

Possums: Giant rats in fake fur coats.

> My dog cornered what I thought was a cat the other day. To my

surprise and

> terror it was an opossum.

[Guest guest]

> might be a bit late with the cat stories .

> I have Truffle who has three legs , but he thinks hes a tiger , and

he chases

> large foxes out of the garden if they dare to come into his

territory .

> Two other daft burmeses , Rosie is a stunning blue tortie , but a

bit of a

> bitch . She does not like it if you sneeze or cough etc and bawls

you out for

> several minutes .

> Big soft is rent- a -cuddle . Hes three years old ,

beautiful reddish

> Apricot colour . However he has acne and has already lost three

teeth

> !!!!!!He likes to sleep on the pillow on my head .

>

Hi ,

Three legs?! In case you missed the post, my Colonel Stubby has only

three legs (and no tail). I was only joking about him being in

Vietnam ;-) There is a new book out about Henrietta, a cat who

traveled the world and met many famous people, such as Sakarov. I'm

not as neurotic about it as the woman in the Onion peice, but I have

a close personal relationship with my cats. Fortunately, the SO is an

animal lover too. Our place resembles a zoo. :-)

Jim