I have a question

June 16, 2001

abraxis3@...

Hi Carol,

Welcome! You will find that there are many loving

and wonderful people here, and that you are not alone!

The people who have overcome major illnesses (like

people with Cancer) and told they only have so long to

live, made a choice...not to 'accept' that they would

die! I read about these people in Dr. Bruce

Goldberg's

books, with curiosity, and what I learned was that

they

'meditated', learned to love their bodies, got in

touch

with 'resentments' and let go of them, changed their

diets, laughed a lot by telling jokes and watching

comedies daily, and changed how they 'thought'. They

all said that their physician was not " God " , and so

refused to accept it. I found this very interesting.

I had been learning about 'meditation', and had been

getting in touch with 'old wounds' and getting in

touch with the 'child' in me. I relived the traumas,

in my mind, and I beleive the meditation opened the

door to this. While I was reliving this, something

very special happened...I became that child again.

I remembered the thoughts I had thought, and the

feelings, that I had never been able to express, and

now I was expressing it, and such a weight lifted off

of me, it was like a miracle. I also remember

thinking, this is what Jesus had meant by 'cleaning

your house'...I learned much that went against what

I had grown up believing, but I had asked God to help

me, and found that He did just that, each step of the

way, through books, people, TV, movies, etc. I found

that there are no such thing as 'coincidences', and

when this truly 'sunk in', I found that I was becoming

aware of things I normally would never have noticed.

I began keeping a journal. One thing I noticed was

how different my thoughts were from day to day. I

would never have believed it, if I hadn't seen it for

myself. I learned that our thoughts are 'things', and

proven by our own science of Quantum Physics, but I

didn't understand totally what that meant. I was

taught that our thoughts create our reality, and that

we are all connected through thought and that illness

is created with mass belief, but I didn't understand

that either. I had suffered from depression for

most of my life, and made terrible choices in mates,

based on my own lack of self-worth. I had much

therapy, group sessions, and years of Ali-non. I had

thirteen operations, spent weeks in mental health

facilities, even had 'shock treatments' and the

after-effects of that, and tried to commit suicide,

and looking back, I know that I had this thing called

fibromyalgia for most of my life, on top of every

other

physical ailment you could think of! I was no stranger

to suffering, emotional and physical. I was told that

I needed to learn to 'love' myself, but no one knew

how to tell me to do this. Then I read a book called

" Conversations with God " . I knew that thoughts were

things, but until I read this book, it never really

hit home, that every thought I have is a prayer, and

every prayer is answered..good and bad...by the Law

of Cause and Effect, which Scientist will tell you

our entire universe is governed by. All of my life

I had felt 'powerless' to make change. It seemed that

these things just 'happened' to me, and that I must

have been really 'bad'! Now I was being told that my

thoughts are 'powerful'...that I am God's child and

my 'thought' is my likeness to Him in that it creates

my reality. That today's experiences are a result

of yesterday's (and the day before, and the day before

that, etc.) thoughts, and that tomorrow's thoughts

are a result of today's thoughts. That to become

'aware' of every thought, and choose whether or not

I wish to experience the results of that thought,

would

change my life.

I looked back in my journals and found that when I'd

been doing pretty well physically, I had been pretty

'upbeat' mentally, and when it was at it's worst, my

thoughts, there on paper, reflected it. I saw how

I would say things like, " I can't " , " I'm in pain " ,

" my life is a disaster " , " this hurts, that hurts " , and

amazingling I also saw what was going on in my life at

the time and started putting together the pain in my

body with it. Such as: my feet were swollen and

tingling and I couldn't walk...I'd also said things

like, " I can't 'stand' this " ... " I can't go on

anymore " ... " I feel stuck " ... " I don't know what to do. "

So, here I was...unable to walk. It hit me, that my

'power' in my thoughts had actually made it so my

body couldn't 'stand', 'couldn't walk', 'had me stuck

in one spot' (my chair!)...and that my problems seemed

so big, that I couldn't stand up to them!!!

This also applied to other parts of my body and

symptoms that I was experiencing... " I can't make up

my mind " , " I don't know what to do " , " my head hurts " ,

" that's a painful thought " . During this time, I was

having migraines! But then again, I was having a

problem dealing with something going on at work, or

in my relationship, that I didn't want to 'think'

about! I began to see, that this was the soul's

way of telling me... " Hey, look at this! The more

you ignore it, and continue saying the things you're

thinking and saying " , the longer it's going to go

on and the worse it's going to get! But see, I didn't

know my thoughts were powerful! I hadn't been taught

that, and in fact, no one else around me believed

it!!!

And I didn't pay any attention to them. I thought it

was okay to say that " I hurt " and talk about it...I

didn't know that doing that would keep it going!!!

My medications didn't help...but I also said, " they

didn't help " !!! I couldn't sleep, but I kept saying

I couldn't sleep!!! It was starting to make sense.

Then I read the book again and this time I picked up

on something else. It said, " Everything you see 'out

there' (physical) began with a 'thought'. Nothing

exists that was not a thought 'first'. How true!!!

Well, I began becoming very aware of the things I

said,

without thinking a whole lot about it before, and I

felt that it was hopeless, because everything seemed

pretty negative, but then I met a woman who told me

that if I would say UP UNTIL NOW after these thoughts,

for a year, it would change my life. That was a year

ago, and it has changed my life. I found that those

thoughts plagued me less and less, just by saying

UP UNTIL NOW, and I learned to replace those thoughts

with ones that I wanted to experience, like... " I am

healthy " . " I can walk " . " I am calm and serene " , etc.

I had all of my friend's saying UP UNTIL NOW. I'd

catch them and they'd catch me saying something

negative, and we'd laugh...we still do! Their lives

are changing for the better, too!

Then one day it hit me, that this is the true meaning

of loving oneself, because I found myself being

gentle with myself and loving, and it was spilling out

to the people around me. I had learned that to judge

someone else meant that my words and thoughts would

be experienced by me...not them...so this is what

Jesus meant by 'judge not least you be judged'.

Everything was suddenly having a whole 'new' meaning.

My relationship with my husband was changing. I

was seeing myself in a whole new light, and for the

first time I wasn't afraid to say 'no' anymore. I

also stuck up for myself, by simply saying how I saw

it, without worrying about their reaction, and low

and behold, I was being treated with 'respect'. My

body was following my change in mind. Pain lessened

and energy returned, and I found myself able to give

up those things that weren't good for me, because

I finally 'wanted' to live! I wanted to be good to

myself, and when I made that choice, people started

appearing to aid me with it. One morning my husband

heard a 'sports, myotherapist' on the radio, who

said he was having wonderful results with people with

fibro, and so the next day we drove 2 hours to where

he was, at a Holiday Inn, and 60 other people were

there. He did a treatment on me with a wonderful

electric massager, and afterwards, for the first time,

it didn't hurt, when this woman grabbed my arm! I

was so astonished, that I cried! I stood there poking

myself all over and ecstatic that it didn't hurt. I

had always been a 'giant bruise'!!! Well, I now own

my own massager! He also said to give up diet pop

and carbonated drinks, and I did, and the swelling

finally went down, and after a month, the tingling

left as well. After 6 weeks, my hands started to

function again and the pain in my fingers left.

I was also drinking loads of water daily..something

I'd

never been good at before!

All this time, I was also aware of my thoughts and

monitoring them! I'm a different person now, and

have this need to share this with everyone I come

into contact with. It doesn't even bother me, now,

if someone thinks I'm crazy, because I KNOW it works!

I am no longer limited, and I haven't forgotten where

I was at!!! It's wonderful, and wonderful things

are opening up for me. Do I still have problems?

If I slip up? Yes! I'm very careful now about what

I think and say, and I'm getting better and better at

it.

So, are you doomed to live the way you are? No. Is

it up to you? Yes. Like God says, " It isn't 'seeing

is believing' " (like we say), " It's 'believing is

seeing' " . Having the faith to do it, and seeing the

results!!!

There are other books that aid with this like " The

Power of Now " , and " The Power is Within You " , by

Louise L. Hay, but " Conversations with God " will

forever be the one that helped to change my life, by,

Neale Walsch.

Someone cared enough to tell me about this, and I'm

simply passing it on the best way that I am able to,

at this time, and what anyone wishes to do with it is

their choice. I've had to overcome many 'fearful'

thoughts myself, and I know that something wonderful

awaits on the other side!

I'm happy to meet you, and you have a wonderful day!

Love,

Sue

--- Carol Lugg wrote:

> Gee, now there's an original subject line, huh?

> Seriously, I have a

> question for those of you that have had fibro for

> awhile now. As I said in

> my intro., I'm new to this stuff, so please be

> patient with me if I seem a

> little slow. Some say that fibro is not

> degenerative, and some say it is.

> Some say that I'm dealing with a major flare up, and

> others say that this is

> the type of thing I'll have to deal with for the

> rest of my life. I've had

> two really bad days this week, with pain levels that

> I never imagined. On

> Monday, I hurt so bad, that I spent the better part

> of the day in bed

> crying. I don't cry easily, so this came as quite a

> shock for me. Today,

> we had to do our grocery shopping for the next two

> weeks, as well as run

> other errands in town, because we live in a small

> town, and we try to make

> the most of our time when we go in. Partway through

> the day, I started

> ripping my husband's head off, because the pain was

> so bad. He is such a

> sweetie, and he figured that my pain had gotten

> really bad, so he was very

> patient with me. Poor guy, it didn't matter what he

> did or said, it was

> wrong. I'm afraid that our oldest son was on the

> receiving end as well.

> I'd rather know the truth, rather than someone

> telling me that if I can just

> get through this rough spot, the pain will go away.

> My physical therapist

> told me the other day that in the 8 years she's been

> doing this, I'm the

> worst case she's seen. My Dr. said pretty much the

> same thing, and has

> referred me (again) to a Rheumatologist, but I can't

> get in until September.

> I'm on a list to call if a cancellation comes in

> sooner.

>

> I guess that this all leads me to a 2nd question:

> What do you guys use for

> pain? I'm almost always at a level 4 or 5 on a

> daily basis, with those

> endless days (that I mentioned earlier), where the

> pain level was so high, I

> don't know a number for it. My Dr. has prescribed

> Tylox, which is similar

> to Percoset, only with more Tylenol in it, and wants

> me to take it every

> four hours. I don't like to take this kind of stuff

> on a regular basis, so

> I take it when I need it, but by the time I realize

> that I'm in that much

> pain, I take one, and it takes at least an hour to

> kick in. By then, I'm

> behind the pain, so I spend several more hours just

> trying to play catch up.

> I don't know what else to do. I'm allowed to take

> two of these things if I

> need it, but it kind of messes with my stomach if I

> do. Also, I can take

> one, and still kind of function, so to speak, but if

> I take two, I'm not

> able to do much of anything.

>

> All help is greatly appreciated. I don't want to

> let this rule my life, but

> I also want to be realistic. I'm enjoying learning

> to ride my horse, and I

> enjoy being active in the church we attend, but that

> in itself can be

> difficult, since it's 40 minutes away, and I go in

> at least three times per

> week.

>

> Thanks so much!,

>

> Carol

>

> P.S. My best friend is also doing great now with

> this stuff. She's been

> asking lots of questions, and reading about it

> herself, so I feel very

> confident that we'll be just fine. As a matter of

> fact, we spent tonight

> eating pizza, and watching a movie, and just doing

> girl stuff, like coloring

> my hair!

>

__________________________________________________

June 16, 2001

abraxis3@...

Hi Carol,

Welcome! You will find that there are many loving

and wonderful people here, and that you are not alone!

The people who have overcome major illnesses (like

people with Cancer) and told they only have so long to

live, made a choice...not to 'accept' that they would

die! I read about these people in Dr. Bruce

Goldberg's

books, with curiosity, and what I learned was that

they

'meditated', learned to love their bodies, got in

touch

with 'resentments' and let go of them, changed their

diets, laughed a lot by telling jokes and watching

comedies daily, and changed how they 'thought'. They

all said that their physician was not " God " , and so

refused to accept it. I found this very interesting.

I had been learning about 'meditation', and had been

getting in touch with 'old wounds' and getting in

touch with the 'child' in me. I relived the traumas,

in my mind, and I beleive the meditation opened the

door to this. While I was reliving this, something

very special happened...I became that child again.

I remembered the thoughts I had thought, and the

feelings, that I had never been able to express, and

now I was expressing it, and such a weight lifted off

of me, it was like a miracle. I also remember

thinking, this is what Jesus had meant by 'cleaning

your house'...I learned much that went against what

I had grown up believing, but I had asked God to help

me, and found that He did just that, each step of the

way, through books, people, TV, movies, etc. I found

that there are no such thing as 'coincidences', and

when this truly 'sunk in', I found that I was becoming

aware of things I normally would never have noticed.

I began keeping a journal. One thing I noticed was

how different my thoughts were from day to day. I

would never have believed it, if I hadn't seen it for

myself. I learned that our thoughts are 'things', and

proven by our own science of Quantum Physics, but I

didn't understand totally what that meant. I was

taught that our thoughts create our reality, and that

we are all connected through thought and that illness

is created with mass belief, but I didn't understand

that either. I had suffered from depression for

most of my life, and made terrible choices in mates,

based on my own lack of self-worth. I had much

therapy, group sessions, and years of Ali-non. I had

thirteen operations, spent weeks in mental health

facilities, even had 'shock treatments' and the

after-effects of that, and tried to commit suicide,

and looking back, I know that I had this thing called

fibromyalgia for most of my life, on top of every

other

physical ailment you could think of! I was no stranger

to suffering, emotional and physical. I was told that

I needed to learn to 'love' myself, but no one knew

how to tell me to do this. Then I read a book called

" Conversations with God " . I knew that thoughts were

things, but until I read this book, it never really

hit home, that every thought I have is a prayer, and

every prayer is answered..good and bad...by the Law

of Cause and Effect, which Scientist will tell you

our entire universe is governed by. All of my life

I had felt 'powerless' to make change. It seemed that

these things just 'happened' to me, and that I must

have been really 'bad'! Now I was being told that my

thoughts are 'powerful'...that I am God's child and

my 'thought' is my likeness to Him in that it creates

my reality. That today's experiences are a result

of yesterday's (and the day before, and the day before

that, etc.) thoughts, and that tomorrow's thoughts

are a result of today's thoughts. That to become

'aware' of every thought, and choose whether or not

I wish to experience the results of that thought,

would

change my life.

I looked back in my journals and found that when I'd

been doing pretty well physically, I had been pretty

'upbeat' mentally, and when it was at it's worst, my

thoughts, there on paper, reflected it. I saw how

I would say things like, " I can't " , " I'm in pain " ,

" my life is a disaster " , " this hurts, that hurts " , and

amazingling I also saw what was going on in my life at

the time and started putting together the pain in my

body with it. Such as: my feet were swollen and

tingling and I couldn't walk...I'd also said things

like, " I can't 'stand' this " ... " I can't go on

anymore " ... " I feel stuck " ... " I don't know what to do. "

So, here I was...unable to walk. It hit me, that my

'power' in my thoughts had actually made it so my

body couldn't 'stand', 'couldn't walk', 'had me stuck

in one spot' (my chair!)...and that my problems seemed

so big, that I couldn't stand up to them!!!

This also applied to other parts of my body and

symptoms that I was experiencing... " I can't make up

my mind " , " I don't know what to do " , " my head hurts " ,

" that's a painful thought " . During this time, I was

having migraines! But then again, I was having a

problem dealing with something going on at work, or

in my relationship, that I didn't want to 'think'

about! I began to see, that this was the soul's

way of telling me... " Hey, look at this! The more

you ignore it, and continue saying the things you're

thinking and saying " , the longer it's going to go

on and the worse it's going to get! But see, I didn't

know my thoughts were powerful! I hadn't been taught

that, and in fact, no one else around me believed

it!!!

And I didn't pay any attention to them. I thought it

was okay to say that " I hurt " and talk about it...I

didn't know that doing that would keep it going!!!

My medications didn't help...but I also said, " they

didn't help " !!! I couldn't sleep, but I kept saying

I couldn't sleep!!! It was starting to make sense.

Then I read the book again and this time I picked up

on something else. It said, " Everything you see 'out

there' (physical) began with a 'thought'. Nothing

exists that was not a thought 'first'. How true!!!

Well, I began becoming very aware of the things I

said,

without thinking a whole lot about it before, and I

felt that it was hopeless, because everything seemed

pretty negative, but then I met a woman who told me

that if I would say UP UNTIL NOW after these thoughts,

for a year, it would change my life. That was a year

ago, and it has changed my life. I found that those

thoughts plagued me less and less, just by saying

UP UNTIL NOW, and I learned to replace those thoughts

with ones that I wanted to experience, like... " I am

healthy " . " I can walk " . " I am calm and serene " , etc.

I had all of my friend's saying UP UNTIL NOW. I'd

catch them and they'd catch me saying something

negative, and we'd laugh...we still do! Their lives

are changing for the better, too!

Then one day it hit me, that this is the true meaning

of loving oneself, because I found myself being

gentle with myself and loving, and it was spilling out

to the people around me. I had learned that to judge

someone else meant that my words and thoughts would

be experienced by me...not them...so this is what

Jesus meant by 'judge not least you be judged'.

Everything was suddenly having a whole 'new' meaning.

My relationship with my husband was changing. I

was seeing myself in a whole new light, and for the

first time I wasn't afraid to say 'no' anymore. I

also stuck up for myself, by simply saying how I saw

it, without worrying about their reaction, and low

and behold, I was being treated with 'respect'. My

body was following my change in mind. Pain lessened

and energy returned, and I found myself able to give

up those things that weren't good for me, because

I finally 'wanted' to live! I wanted to be good to

myself, and when I made that choice, people started

appearing to aid me with it. One morning my husband

heard a 'sports, myotherapist' on the radio, who

said he was having wonderful results with people with

fibro, and so the next day we drove 2 hours to where

he was, at a Holiday Inn, and 60 other people were

there. He did a treatment on me with a wonderful

electric massager, and afterwards, for the first time,

it didn't hurt, when this woman grabbed my arm! I

was so astonished, that I cried! I stood there poking

myself all over and ecstatic that it didn't hurt. I

had always been a 'giant bruise'!!! Well, I now own

my own massager! He also said to give up diet pop

and carbonated drinks, and I did, and the swelling

finally went down, and after a month, the tingling

left as well. After 6 weeks, my hands started to

function again and the pain in my fingers left.

I was also drinking loads of water daily..something

I'd

never been good at before!

All this time, I was also aware of my thoughts and

monitoring them! I'm a different person now, and

have this need to share this with everyone I come

into contact with. It doesn't even bother me, now,

if someone thinks I'm crazy, because I KNOW it works!

I am no longer limited, and I haven't forgotten where

I was at!!! It's wonderful, and wonderful things

are opening up for me. Do I still have problems?

If I slip up? Yes! I'm very careful now about what

I think and say, and I'm getting better and better at

it.

So, are you doomed to live the way you are? No. Is

it up to you? Yes. Like God says, " It isn't 'seeing

is believing' " (like we say), " It's 'believing is

seeing' " . Having the faith to do it, and seeing the

results!!!

There are other books that aid with this like " The

Power of Now " , and " The Power is Within You " , by

Louise L. Hay, but " Conversations with God " will

forever be the one that helped to change my life, by,

Neale Walsch.

Someone cared enough to tell me about this, and I'm

simply passing it on the best way that I am able to,

at this time, and what anyone wishes to do with it is

their choice. I've had to overcome many 'fearful'

thoughts myself, and I know that something wonderful

awaits on the other side!

I'm happy to meet you, and you have a wonderful day!

Love,

Sue

--- Carol Lugg wrote:

> Gee, now there's an original subject line, huh?

> Seriously, I have a

> question for those of you that have had fibro for

> awhile now. As I said in

> my intro., I'm new to this stuff, so please be

> patient with me if I seem a

> little slow. Some say that fibro is not

> degenerative, and some say it is.

> Some say that I'm dealing with a major flare up, and

> others say that this is

> the type of thing I'll have to deal with for the

> rest of my life. I've had

> two really bad days this week, with pain levels that

> I never imagined. On

> Monday, I hurt so bad, that I spent the better part

> of the day in bed

> crying. I don't cry easily, so this came as quite a

> shock for me. Today,

> we had to do our grocery shopping for the next two

> weeks, as well as run

> other errands in town, because we live in a small

> town, and we try to make

> the most of our time when we go in. Partway through

> the day, I started

> ripping my husband's head off, because the pain was

> so bad. He is such a

> sweetie, and he figured that my pain had gotten

> really bad, so he was very

> patient with me. Poor guy, it didn't matter what he

> did or said, it was

> wrong. I'm afraid that our oldest son was on the

> receiving end as well.

> I'd rather know the truth, rather than someone

> telling me that if I can just

> get through this rough spot, the pain will go away.

> My physical therapist

> told me the other day that in the 8 years she's been

> doing this, I'm the

> worst case she's seen. My Dr. said pretty much the

> same thing, and has

> referred me (again) to a Rheumatologist, but I can't

> get in until September.

> I'm on a list to call if a cancellation comes in

> sooner.

>

> I guess that this all leads me to a 2nd question:

> What do you guys use for

> pain? I'm almost always at a level 4 or 5 on a

> daily basis, with those

> endless days (that I mentioned earlier), where the

> pain level was so high, I

> don't know a number for it. My Dr. has prescribed

> Tylox, which is similar

> to Percoset, only with more Tylenol in it, and wants

> me to take it every

> four hours. I don't like to take this kind of stuff

> on a regular basis, so

> I take it when I need it, but by the time I realize

> that I'm in that much

> pain, I take one, and it takes at least an hour to

> kick in. By then, I'm

> behind the pain, so I spend several more hours just

> trying to play catch up.

> I don't know what else to do. I'm allowed to take

> two of these things if I

> need it, but it kind of messes with my stomach if I

> do. Also, I can take

> one, and still kind of function, so to speak, but if

> I take two, I'm not

> able to do much of anything.

>

> All help is greatly appreciated. I don't want to

> let this rule my life, but

> I also want to be realistic. I'm enjoying learning

> to ride my horse, and I

> enjoy being active in the church we attend, but that

> in itself can be

> difficult, since it's 40 minutes away, and I go in

> at least three times per

> week.

>

> Thanks so much!,

>

> Carol

>

> P.S. My best friend is also doing great now with

> this stuff. She's been

> asking lots of questions, and reading about it

> herself, so I feel very

> confident that we'll be just fine. As a matter of

> fact, we spent tonight

> eating pizza, and watching a movie, and just doing

> girl stuff, like coloring

> my hair!

>

__________________________________________________

June 16, 2001

abraxis3@...

Hi Carol,

Welcome! You will find that there are many loving

and wonderful people here, and that you are not alone!

The people who have overcome major illnesses (like

people with Cancer) and told they only have so long to

live, made a choice...not to 'accept' that they would

die! I read about these people in Dr. Bruce

Goldberg's

books, with curiosity, and what I learned was that

they

'meditated', learned to love their bodies, got in

touch

with 'resentments' and let go of them, changed their

diets, laughed a lot by telling jokes and watching

comedies daily, and changed how they 'thought'. They

all said that their physician was not " God " , and so

refused to accept it. I found this very interesting.

I had been learning about 'meditation', and had been

getting in touch with 'old wounds' and getting in

touch with the 'child' in me. I relived the traumas,

in my mind, and I beleive the meditation opened the

door to this. While I was reliving this, something

very special happened...I became that child again.

I remembered the thoughts I had thought, and the

feelings, that I had never been able to express, and

now I was expressing it, and such a weight lifted off

of me, it was like a miracle. I also remember

thinking, this is what Jesus had meant by 'cleaning

your house'...I learned much that went against what

I had grown up believing, but I had asked God to help

me, and found that He did just that, each step of the

way, through books, people, TV, movies, etc. I found

that there are no such thing as 'coincidences', and

when this truly 'sunk in', I found that I was becoming

aware of things I normally would never have noticed.

I began keeping a journal. One thing I noticed was

how different my thoughts were from day to day. I

would never have believed it, if I hadn't seen it for

myself. I learned that our thoughts are 'things', and

proven by our own science of Quantum Physics, but I

didn't understand totally what that meant. I was

taught that our thoughts create our reality, and that

we are all connected through thought and that illness

is created with mass belief, but I didn't understand

that either. I had suffered from depression for

most of my life, and made terrible choices in mates,

based on my own lack of self-worth. I had much

therapy, group sessions, and years of Ali-non. I had

thirteen operations, spent weeks in mental health

facilities, even had 'shock treatments' and the

after-effects of that, and tried to commit suicide,

and looking back, I know that I had this thing called

fibromyalgia for most of my life, on top of every

other

physical ailment you could think of! I was no stranger

to suffering, emotional and physical. I was told that

I needed to learn to 'love' myself, but no one knew

how to tell me to do this. Then I read a book called

" Conversations with God " . I knew that thoughts were

things, but until I read this book, it never really

hit home, that every thought I have is a prayer, and

every prayer is answered..good and bad...by the Law

of Cause and Effect, which Scientist will tell you

our entire universe is governed by. All of my life

I had felt 'powerless' to make change. It seemed that

these things just 'happened' to me, and that I must

have been really 'bad'! Now I was being told that my

thoughts are 'powerful'...that I am God's child and

my 'thought' is my likeness to Him in that it creates

my reality. That today's experiences are a result

of yesterday's (and the day before, and the day before

that, etc.) thoughts, and that tomorrow's thoughts

are a result of today's thoughts. That to become

'aware' of every thought, and choose whether or not

I wish to experience the results of that thought,

would

change my life.

I looked back in my journals and found that when I'd

been doing pretty well physically, I had been pretty

'upbeat' mentally, and when it was at it's worst, my

thoughts, there on paper, reflected it. I saw how

I would say things like, " I can't " , " I'm in pain " ,

" my life is a disaster " , " this hurts, that hurts " , and

amazingling I also saw what was going on in my life at

the time and started putting together the pain in my

body with it. Such as: my feet were swollen and

tingling and I couldn't walk...I'd also said things

like, " I can't 'stand' this " ... " I can't go on

anymore " ... " I feel stuck " ... " I don't know what to do. "

So, here I was...unable to walk. It hit me, that my

'power' in my thoughts had actually made it so my

body couldn't 'stand', 'couldn't walk', 'had me stuck

in one spot' (my chair!)...and that my problems seemed

so big, that I couldn't stand up to them!!!

This also applied to other parts of my body and

symptoms that I was experiencing... " I can't make up

my mind " , " I don't know what to do " , " my head hurts " ,

" that's a painful thought " . During this time, I was

having migraines! But then again, I was having a

problem dealing with something going on at work, or

in my relationship, that I didn't want to 'think'

about! I began to see, that this was the soul's

way of telling me... " Hey, look at this! The more

you ignore it, and continue saying the things you're

thinking and saying " , the longer it's going to go

on and the worse it's going to get! But see, I didn't

know my thoughts were powerful! I hadn't been taught

that, and in fact, no one else around me believed

it!!!

And I didn't pay any attention to them. I thought it

was okay to say that " I hurt " and talk about it...I

didn't know that doing that would keep it going!!!

My medications didn't help...but I also said, " they

didn't help " !!! I couldn't sleep, but I kept saying

I couldn't sleep!!! It was starting to make sense.

Then I read the book again and this time I picked up

on something else. It said, " Everything you see 'out

there' (physical) began with a 'thought'. Nothing

exists that was not a thought 'first'. How true!!!

Well, I began becoming very aware of the things I

said,

without thinking a whole lot about it before, and I

felt that it was hopeless, because everything seemed

pretty negative, but then I met a woman who told me

that if I would say UP UNTIL NOW after these thoughts,

for a year, it would change my life. That was a year

ago, and it has changed my life. I found that those

thoughts plagued me less and less, just by saying

UP UNTIL NOW, and I learned to replace those thoughts

with ones that I wanted to experience, like... " I am

healthy " . " I can walk " . " I am calm and serene " , etc.

I had all of my friend's saying UP UNTIL NOW. I'd

catch them and they'd catch me saying something

negative, and we'd laugh...we still do! Their lives

are changing for the better, too!

Then one day it hit me, that this is the true meaning

of loving oneself, because I found myself being

gentle with myself and loving, and it was spilling out

to the people around me. I had learned that to judge

someone else meant that my words and thoughts would

be experienced by me...not them...so this is what

Jesus meant by 'judge not least you be judged'.

Everything was suddenly having a whole 'new' meaning.

My relationship with my husband was changing. I

was seeing myself in a whole new light, and for the

first time I wasn't afraid to say 'no' anymore. I

also stuck up for myself, by simply saying how I saw

it, without worrying about their reaction, and low

and behold, I was being treated with 'respect'. My

body was following my change in mind. Pain lessened

and energy returned, and I found myself able to give

up those things that weren't good for me, because

I finally 'wanted' to live! I wanted to be good to

myself, and when I made that choice, people started

appearing to aid me with it. One morning my husband

heard a 'sports, myotherapist' on the radio, who

said he was having wonderful results with people with

fibro, and so the next day we drove 2 hours to where

he was, at a Holiday Inn, and 60 other people were

there. He did a treatment on me with a wonderful

electric massager, and afterwards, for the first time,

it didn't hurt, when this woman grabbed my arm! I

was so astonished, that I cried! I stood there poking

myself all over and ecstatic that it didn't hurt. I

had always been a 'giant bruise'!!! Well, I now own

my own massager! He also said to give up diet pop

and carbonated drinks, and I did, and the swelling

finally went down, and after a month, the tingling

left as well. After 6 weeks, my hands started to

function again and the pain in my fingers left.

I was also drinking loads of water daily..something

I'd

never been good at before!

All this time, I was also aware of my thoughts and

monitoring them! I'm a different person now, and

have this need to share this with everyone I come

into contact with. It doesn't even bother me, now,

if someone thinks I'm crazy, because I KNOW it works!

I am no longer limited, and I haven't forgotten where

I was at!!! It's wonderful, and wonderful things

are opening up for me. Do I still have problems?

If I slip up? Yes! I'm very careful now about what

I think and say, and I'm getting better and better at

it.

So, are you doomed to live the way you are? No. Is

it up to you? Yes. Like God says, " It isn't 'seeing

is believing' " (like we say), " It's 'believing is

seeing' " . Having the faith to do it, and seeing the

results!!!

There are other books that aid with this like " The

Power of Now " , and " The Power is Within You " , by

Louise L. Hay, but " Conversations with God " will

forever be the one that helped to change my life, by,

Neale Walsch.

Someone cared enough to tell me about this, and I'm

simply passing it on the best way that I am able to,

at this time, and what anyone wishes to do with it is

their choice. I've had to overcome many 'fearful'

thoughts myself, and I know that something wonderful

awaits on the other side!

I'm happy to meet you, and you have a wonderful day!

Love,

Sue

--- Carol Lugg wrote:

> Gee, now there's an original subject line, huh?

> Seriously, I have a

> question for those of you that have had fibro for

> awhile now. As I said in

> my intro., I'm new to this stuff, so please be

> patient with me if I seem a

> little slow. Some say that fibro is not

> degenerative, and some say it is.

> Some say that I'm dealing with a major flare up, and

> others say that this is

> the type of thing I'll have to deal with for the

> rest of my life. I've had

> two really bad days this week, with pain levels that

> I never imagined. On

> Monday, I hurt so bad, that I spent the better part

> of the day in bed

> crying. I don't cry easily, so this came as quite a

> shock for me. Today,

> we had to do our grocery shopping for the next two

> weeks, as well as run

> other errands in town, because we live in a small

> town, and we try to make

> the most of our time when we go in. Partway through

> the day, I started

> ripping my husband's head off, because the pain was

> so bad. He is such a

> sweetie, and he figured that my pain had gotten

> really bad, so he was very

> patient with me. Poor guy, it didn't matter what he

> did or said, it was

> wrong. I'm afraid that our oldest son was on the

> receiving end as well.

> I'd rather know the truth, rather than someone

> telling me that if I can just

> get through this rough spot, the pain will go away.

> My physical therapist

> told me the other day that in the 8 years she's been

> doing this, I'm the

> worst case she's seen. My Dr. said pretty much the

> same thing, and has

> referred me (again) to a Rheumatologist, but I can't

> get in until September.

> I'm on a list to call if a cancellation comes in

> sooner.

>

> I guess that this all leads me to a 2nd question:

> What do you guys use for

> pain? I'm almost always at a level 4 or 5 on a

> daily basis, with those

> endless days (that I mentioned earlier), where the

> pain level was so high, I

> don't know a number for it. My Dr. has prescribed

> Tylox, which is similar

> to Percoset, only with more Tylenol in it, and wants

> me to take it every

> four hours. I don't like to take this kind of stuff

> on a regular basis, so

> I take it when I need it, but by the time I realize

> that I'm in that much

> pain, I take one, and it takes at least an hour to

> kick in. By then, I'm

> behind the pain, so I spend several more hours just

> trying to play catch up.

> I don't know what else to do. I'm allowed to take

> two of these things if I

> need it, but it kind of messes with my stomach if I

> do. Also, I can take

> one, and still kind of function, so to speak, but if

> I take two, I'm not

> able to do much of anything.

>

> All help is greatly appreciated. I don't want to

> let this rule my life, but

> I also want to be realistic. I'm enjoying learning

> to ride my horse, and I

> enjoy being active in the church we attend, but that

> in itself can be

> difficult, since it's 40 minutes away, and I go in

> at least three times per

> week.

>

> Thanks so much!,

>

> Carol

>

> P.S. My best friend is also doing great now with

> this stuff. She's been

> asking lots of questions, and reading about it

> herself, so I feel very

> confident that we'll be just fine. As a matter of

> fact, we spent tonight

> eating pizza, and watching a movie, and just doing

> girl stuff, like coloring

> my hair!

>

__________________________________________________

June 16, 2001

Some say that fibro is not degenerative, and some say it

is.

Some say that I'm dealing with a major flare up, and others say that

this is

the type of thing I'll have to deal with for the rest of my life.

Hi Carol,

I haven't been dealing with all of my smptoms that long, but some of them

have been for years. My fatigue is my main complaint, and that has steadily

gotten worse over the last 4 or 5 years. I had a major flare in February,

and everything (pain, fatigue, etc) got notched up a level. My fatigue has

never gotten better, and has in fact gotten worse. My pain has gotten a

little better. Sorry, but I can't help you with the pain question since I

am able to manage not to take anything for pain.

Darcy

June 16, 2001

Some say that fibro is not degenerative, and some say it

is.

Some say that I'm dealing with a major flare up, and others say that

this is

the type of thing I'll have to deal with for the rest of my life.

Hi Carol,

I haven't been dealing with all of my smptoms that long, but some of them

have been for years. My fatigue is my main complaint, and that has steadily

gotten worse over the last 4 or 5 years. I had a major flare in February,

and everything (pain, fatigue, etc) got notched up a level. My fatigue has

never gotten better, and has in fact gotten worse. My pain has gotten a

little better. Sorry, but I can't help you with the pain question since I

am able to manage not to take anything for pain.

Darcy

June 16, 2001

Some say that fibro is not degenerative, and some say it

is.

Some say that I'm dealing with a major flare up, and others say that

this is

the type of thing I'll have to deal with for the rest of my life.

Hi Carol,

I haven't been dealing with all of my smptoms that long, but some of them

have been for years. My fatigue is my main complaint, and that has steadily

gotten worse over the last 4 or 5 years. I had a major flare in February,

and everything (pain, fatigue, etc) got notched up a level. My fatigue has

never gotten better, and has in fact gotten worse. My pain has gotten a

little better. Sorry, but I can't help you with the pain question since I

am able to manage not to take anything for pain.

Darcy

June 16, 2001

First and foremost you need to take you pain medication on a regular

schedule. You need to stay ahead of the pain and not behind it. I don't

like taking pain medication but I now realize that I need to if I am going to

cope.

I am on morphine every 12 hours. It is a time release pill. It is no a real

strong dosage but I am having a lot of break through pain so I suspect that I

will be going up. I take Vicodon for break through pain.

The trouble is that you can't play catch up. The pain is already ahead of

you. We all have days of heavy pain which is a flare. I am having one now.

It started yesterday but it is getting worse today. I will spend the day in

bed and hope tomorrow is better.

As for being progressive, I don't know what to say. I don't know how much

each of these flares take out of you. Myself, I have so many other problems

that it is really hard to say if they can be put down to fibro. I know that

most of us have a tendency to blame any new problem on fibro.

I doubt if that helped you much but other will be answering you.

Take care,

Irene

> I guess that this all leads me to a 2nd question: What do you guys use for

> pain? I'm almost always at a level 4 or 5 on a daily basis, with those

> endless days (that I mentioned earlier), where the pain level was so high, I

> don't know a number for it. My Dr. has prescribed Tylox, which is similar

> to Percoset, only with more Tylenol in it, and wants me to take it every

> four hours. I don't like to take this kind of stuff on a regular basis, so

> I take it when I need it, but by the time I realize that I'm in that much

> pain, I take one, and it takes at least an hour to kick in. By then, I'm

> behind the pain, so I spend several more hours just trying to play catch up.

> I don't know what else to do. I'm allowed to take two of these things if I

> need it, but it kind of messes with my stomach if I do. Also, I can take

> one, and still kind of function, so to speak, but if I take two, I'm not

> able to do much of anything.

>

June 16, 2001