Re: I seem to have rattled a cage!

[Guest guest]

What about a wooden toy, like a farm or railway set or similar? Tridias

have them and they are not cheap but will last forever (so you can

eventually offload them onto your grandchildren ;-)!!)

Lesley

whose DD2 plays with wooden toys bought for DS1, 25 yrs ago.

-------------------------------------------------------------------->

> has the grand sum of £95 to spend following his birthday

> last week! What to get him? I've no idea - we don't have space for

> any more toys!!!

[Guest guest]

>What about a wooden toy, like a farm or railway set or similar? Tridias

>have them and they are not cheap but will last forever (so you can

>eventually offload them onto your grandchildren ;-)!!)

>Lesley

Oh I love those wooden toys from Tridias. I've definately got my eye on the

dolls' house for when Caitlin's a little older!

[Guest guest]

>

> Anyone else been watching " Other People's Children " on Sunday evenings?

>

>

>

Unfortunately not. Is it good?

(somebody else's child)

[Guest guest]

>> Anyone else been watching " Other People's Children " on Sunday evenings?

>>

>>

>>

>

>Unfortunately not. Is it good?

> (somebody else's child)

I'm enjoying it, but then I like Joanna Trollope. I thought that Rob might

be interested in watching (ha) seeing as he went through the whole other

people's children bit as a child, then again, as a teenager, but there just

isn't enough in the way of car chases, guns, fighter aircraft, space battles

etc for his liking.

[Guest guest]

I have absolutely no problem with my MIL - far from it. She is lovely and

keeps just the right distance. It is the general assumption that, once

married, ILs should be treated identically to natural parents, that I find

difficult to live up to. I have known and loved and had reason to bond

deeply with my parents all my life. I *cannot* transfer those sorts of

feelings to someone I am related to simply because I married their son. I

have my own, very valid feelings for MIL (there is no FIL on the scene), but

they cannot equate to those I feel for my own parents, and consequently I

deal with them differently on a day to day basis. As far as the children

are concerned, I try very hard to make them as accessible as possible to

MIL, but my parents *do* see them more often simply because they see *me*

more often. Is this making sense?

As far as DH is concerned, I don't expect him to treat my parents the same

as his mother, but, as it turns out, he actually gets on better with my

parents than with his own. As far as my sisters and his sister are

concerned, I think he feels they are all batty and would prefer to keep his

distance!!

Alison

> Gosh, my situation is SO different. I don't get on too well with my Mum.

> When I got married she would phone every day, and when asked not to,

because

> we just wanted space to get to know each other, she got the hump. Having

> then got pregnant on honeymoon, she kept ringing me again. I stopped

> answering, usually because I was being sick or trying to sleep. I ended up

> having counselling during pregnancy as we were not talking at all then. I

> think she has finally got the message nearly 3 years later, but it has

been

> so bad.

>

> My MIL on the other hand is so understanding. She always has a kind word

to

> say to me. She even brings me presents when they visit (not just for

> grandson). The last time she came and was minding a sleeping DS whilst DH

> and I escaped to IKEA, she even ironed all DH shirts, all 18 of them! The

> only thing I could accuse her of is being TOO nice. (and she does have a

dog

> which I hate - YUK)

>

> I just hope I can be as understanding a MIL for DS DW in the future.

> the opposite

[Guest guest]

Ours too. Have been known to raid them when desperate, but always put back

far more than I've taken out!

Alison

....And the rest into his savings account (why do my children have more

savings than me???)

>

[Guest guest]

> Gosh the parents (in-laws and other) thing is a big mine-field.

>

MIL BF 4 children and has been invaluable source of info - or rrather

FIL has - he's one very clued up down to earth kinda guy. They do the

annoying overhelpful things all parents seem to do, but they're great

with the kids and never spoil them, which is more than I can say for

my own mother!!

Wouldn't be without any of them, despite their annoying habits.

As for names I have more trouble with what to call my DH in front of

them - to them he's Mark - to me he's Taz - an old college nickname.

They get all our names mixed up anyway - I ocaisionally get called

- DH's brother - but apparantly it's a Mansfield thing.

/.

[Guest guest]

I remember my sister telling me that when her MIL was visiting her in

hospital with her DS1 she said as my parents turned up " Well, number one

grandma is here now so I'd better go " . I also remember when my best friend

told me she was pg I said " Your parents must be SO THRILLED " she said " Yes,

they're completely all over me - I don't understand, I thought as had

already had a son they would be more laid back " . I had to explain that her

SIL's baby was hardly the same as THEIR DAUGHTER having a baby!!!!

My mum died 2 years before I started going out with DH and I have a

stepmother now so it's a bit different - I feel that MIL ought to take

priority over stepmother and so does my stepmother but fortunately both of

them are very wary of treading on my toes!

Anneliese (part-time) SAHM to Baby Tim (18/9/99), member, Alton, Bordon and

district branch