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Re: Re: 21 year old child

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hi! I can relate to everything you have said because my 24 year old

daughter dual diagnosed with bpd as well as bipolar 11, depression, lives with

me and it seems to get only harder and more complicated as she gets older, she

wowuld like to get treatment so that socially her relationships will improve but

yet blames all her shortcomings on everybody or anything other than her own

part. She expects me to wait on her hand and foot but one thing i will say! is

if i keep on her, she will take her meds except when she needs it the most, when

i am sick she is sicker. She is a constant challenge and is ex-hausting. there

are very specific patterns , and it never ends all the multi complex situations

that occur, and i am trying right now to find a solution that would benefit

both of us. My daughter is not in therapy, although has been at times and it

seemed to help with out relationship and her grandiose spending and helped her

to stay more on track. i find that when she eats

healthy and the three meal thing a day, it helps her dispsosition, but she

has a very grim view of the world, that is for sure! I feel for her but finally

it is her decision to go into therapy, maybe a live-in program which i am

looking into now,( and she is not opposed to this) I live in th ebay area and

there some possibilities,She wanted to wait until after the holidays, so now i

know it is up to me to make it happen as usual! i havce a very hard time myself

to be productive, because it is always about her and also somethting is always

wrong with her car, ongoing and always espensive which drains my pocket book,

and she thinks i can pull $ out of a hat, but I will say that she does work

hard in retail, and is very responsible and dedicated to her work. att imes

there are sissues with co-workers, but that tends to get straightened out, but

repeats itself with someone else to be the problem of course!! Actually at work

she is always getting awarded for the best

performance with customer service, which really threw me for a loop! And does

very well, so she keeps busy with her job and that is her whole life it seems,

very few friends anymore, they have all moved away!!! At home it is another

story. she is rude to my friends, when she doesn'r feel like seeing people,

which is more than not, and loves to be in control of my every move. She doesn't

lift a finger toward any housework, however, it is soo sad for me as her mother

to see this. i just cannot fix things anymore! When your child doesns't want

to participate in the world other than laying in bed on her off time watching

nothing but the music channel, and asking me questions all the time over and

over, and ones we have been over and and even know the answer. Does any of this

sound familiar to you? she loves her cat, and often makes cat like sounds and

funny sqeaking expressions, whwich is a hard one, and will talk very slow, with

one of her different personalities. Well, i have

vented, but would love to hear from you! it helps so much. thanks, dd

Fla wrote:

I have been away too for a few days with my Bp daughter. I am too mentally

exhausted from this " vacation " to elaborate. Will write When I have the mental

capability.

ckk222 wrote:

>

> > Hi Deb - I have a 20 year old daughter still at home

> > and probably won't be

> > leaving it till we find a crow-bar big enough to pry

> > her out of her room!

> > Has no academic ambition - has dropped every class

> > ever taken - total waste

> > of tuition, NUMEROUS jobs and left each and every

> > due to it being the

> > employers " issues. " Blew the engine of her car and

> > is so po'd that we

> > refuse to buy her another one. Does any of this

> > sound familiar??

> >

> > Her formal dx is as bipolar, completely off meds

> > (her choice) and hasn't

> > seen her T in ages.....but, if she had remained in

> > school, would still be on

> > my insurance....

> >

> > 'Fraid we've been banging heads lately, I've always

> > been the focus of her

> > frustrations (rage), only this time, last week she

> > decided to try to take on

> > her dad and what a major uh-oh that was. He's very

> > quiet and basically

> > nonconfrontational (most times), she mistook it as

> > being a push-over for

> > this round...hah....what a surprise she got.

> >

> > So, from your post, I'm guessing you also have an

> > adult " child " in the home.

> >

> > Is he/she in school, working?

> >

> > Take care - k

> >

> >

> >

> > 21 year old " child "

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> > Anyone around with an " adult " child at home?

> >

> > Deb

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> > Send questions & concerns to

> > WTOParentsOfBPs-owner " Stop

> > Walking on Eggshells, " a primer for non-BPs can be

> > ordered via

> > 1-888-35-SHELL (). For the table of

> > contents, see

> > http://www.BPDCentral.com

> >

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