Guest guest Posted July 14, 2003 Report Share Posted July 14, 2003 Hello Group, I have an appointment with Dr. Fisher on Aug 7th...and was told if I lose my last 11 pounds by then that they'll set a date! Unfortunately since they told me that...I've been bingeing. Can you guys share some of the methods you used to get over the underlying fear of having this surgery? Thanks, M. Pre-Op 320/296 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 14, 2003 Report Share Posted July 14, 2003 : Turning to the group is your first step at conquering this. What helped me was using the 7 points of maintenance given by Dr. Gity at Kaiser SSF. The combination is powerful and really helped me through some tough times. These are what successful post-ops (and pre-ops--me) have done to stay on track. Dr. Gity said that we have to start this process of maintenance NOW, not post-op. The 7 points are: 1. Daily prayer. Surrender your problems to God (or your Higher Power). Ask God in short, declarative statments for help. Have faith that this too shall pass. Don't abandon God because He'll never abandon you. 2. Maintain daily contact with support. You've got all of us online. 3. Be part of the group. Don't isolate yourself when you're feeling down or challenged. Participate fully in some group activity often-- gastric bypass related or not. 4. Check in with others. As others give you help, you will in turn offer help to them. This helps us stay in balance as we give and receive. 5. Have a plan. Give structure to your day. Don't let a day go by without some plan to help yourself achieve your goals. " Those who fail to plan, plan to fail. " Plan your meals, plan your exercise, plan your water, plan your rest, etc. 6. Be self-aware. Take pride in your uniqueness. Take pride in the strides you're making in this journey. Don't lose focus because you've stumbled. Brush yourself off and get back on the path. And if you're stressed, destress with a nice bath or a massage. Do something nice for just you. 7. Keep active. Get daily exercise. Exercise will help you lose weight, it'll help you down your water, it'll help reduce your apetite, and it'll relieve stress. And stress is a real binge inducer. And one bonus point of maintenance from me--this is my personal point of maintenance which has helped me a great deal: 8. Maintain healthy boundaries: protect your personal time and your privacy. Don't let others--well intentioned or not--encroach upon the time you need to take care of you. Avoid negative people, or politely tell them that you simply won't accept negative attitudes around you. Wrap yourself in a loving cocoon, and tell yourself positive messages of affirmation--practice this EVERY time you feel bad about yourself, or when you feel scared about this process. Stop the negative self-talk. Make a mental boundary where negative self- talk is no longer tolerated, only positive self-talk. It takes practice, but there is no better time to start than now. I hope this helps. It's really helped me. Good luck and God Bless. You've got inner strength that you've only begun to tap. Believe in yourself, and your own personal miracle will begin to unfold before your eyes. Francisco -82 lbs > Hello Group, > > I have an appointment with Dr. Fisher on Aug 7th...and was told if I lose my > last 11 pounds by then that they'll set a date! > > Unfortunately since they told me that...I've been bingeing. Can you guys > share some of the methods you used to get over the underlying fear of having this > surgery? > > Thanks, > > M. > Pre-Op > 320/296 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 15, 2003 Report Share Posted July 15, 2003 Francisco, I just love you. I don't know you, never saw you, but you always have such insightful things to say, and the way you say it, makes me really feel what you mean. I just wanted to let you know that your advise touches me each time and is very helpful. I also want to congraulate you on your sucess. Keep up the good work and the good posts. :0) Caren and Elenore My prayers are with you today, and God will take care of you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 15, 2003 Report Share Posted July 15, 2003 , Remember why you chose to pursue this surgery? Remember the things you felt and the things you experienced that got you to the point where you said enough is enough--it's time to take care of me? The bingeing is a sympton of underlying fears and emotions. Of course you are scared. You are about to change the rest of your life and if you are anything like me, the thought of changing the longest relationship most of us have ever had--the relationship with food--is overwhelming. What I can tell you is that there is no "last meal". Stay focused on your reasons for doing this in the first place and be mindful that what you do now sets the stage for your success in the future. If you binge, don't beat yourself up. Every moment is a chance to start anew. Build on those moments and you will continue to be successful. This new life is not just another diet that we have all started and failed at many times so that we just give up. This is a whole new start to live life and be free of the physical effects of morbid obesity. The psychological and emotional effects have a long history with us and starting now to understand those things will assist you as you move on your journey. If you are not going to a support group, then get thee to one! Stay on these email groups and remember you do not have to do this alone, we are all here for support. The effort is very worth it as you can tell from those of us who are post-op. There is no magic, only the determination and hard work for what we all know is a better life. God bless you and your family and please keep us posted on your progress. Hugs, Pat B. -----Original Message-----From: merrylady@... Sent: Monday, July 14, 2003 8:58 PMTo: gastric-bypass-support-kaiser-patients Subject: Bingeing Hello Group, I have an appointment with Dr. Fisher on Aug 7th...and was told if I lose my last 11 pounds by then that they'll set a date! Unfortunately since they told me that...I've been bingeing. Can you guys share some of the methods you used to get over the underlying fear of having this surgery? Thanks, M. Pre-Op 320/296 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 19, 2003 Report Share Posted July 19, 2003 Carla, Please be careful while you are on vacation. You don't want to start over on your weight loss. I have only shed 2 of the 30 pounds I need to lose, so you are doing much better than I am. Keep up the faith in yourself. I know you can do it. Carolcarlalambertson@... wrote: Hello everyone, my name is Carla Lambertson. I live in Rohnert Park CA and am going to have my surgery in Richmond with Dr. Fisher. I wanted to introduce myself and tell everyone a little about myself, because it seems as if everyone know's everone else. A bit of my history… I have been overweight since I was around 6 years old. At six years old when staying with family while my sister was being delivered in the hospital, I put on 18 pounds in one week. As you can see food/eating has been a huge issue in my life since a very young age. Because my mother was morbidly obese (300) , she from the time I was a baby on monitored, watched and restricted what I ate. She was trying to help me so that I wouldn't have to deal with the problems that she had with being overweight, but didn't know that right approach. The clear message I was taught (by her actions) was if I let you eat when you’re hungry and stop when your full (content), you won't, you will overeat like me. In turn I learned and developed destructive eating patterns from a very young age due to feeling controlled and having no sense of personal control/responsibility with regards to eating/food. I also snuck food and ate when not around home (on every occasion). Over the years I have tried many diets, but sooner or later I end up blowing it and going off my program because I was and am still an emotional eater (one who uses food to medicate & numb (deal with) my emotions). It has been my learned life long coping mechanism. I now realize that it worked for me as a little girl with a limited amount of resources, but that it no longer works for me as an adult but against me. I am just starting to feel compassion instead of severe judgment toward myself for what I went though and understanding why I used food. Emotional eating (turning to food for comfort), has been the coping mechanism (drug of my choice) for my whole life. Which brings me to where I am in my life at this season. In March 2003 I had a physical with my PCP. She suggested that I considering having the weight loss surgery. I was also offered this surgery back in 4-99 from a different PCP and was scared of the surgery (never have even had stitches) and offended that she thought i needed this dirastic of a method. I have tried diets and I feel like even if I were to loose a lot of the weight, there is no guarantee that I won't gain it back. My husband Alan & I talked a lot about this, and came to a mutual decision; I am ready to have the surgery. April & May 2003 getting dietitian & psychologist referrals June 6, 2003 Approved for surgery - letter June 19, 2003 met with Surgeon Dr. Fisher, he is requiring me to loose 10% of my body weight prior to surgery 457.3 (45.7) pounds, actually he said 50 pounds, also had case manager meeting with Chris. Dr. Fisher said if I could loose ½ of the 45.7 pounds by the next meeting 7-10 he would give me my surgery date. June 19th – July 10th gave 100% effort on losing the weight did weight watchers for 2 weeks and lost 13.3 pounds, then went on Atkins (big mistake) and gained 1.1. July 10, 2003 I did not get my surgery date at the orientation meeting because I had not lost enough weight yet, I weighed in at 445.1, I left so discouraged and have been off the wagon ever since. I am going on vacation next week and plan to eat reasonably but still enjoy myself. When I get back it will be back to the grind for me. I really want to have surgery in September/October so I have alot of work to do. Thank you for the support! Carla Eugenia Lambertson www.thelambertsons.com carlalambertson@... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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