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Kathi,

I'm in Groveport. I've searched the web for a support group but the

only one I could find was in Mt. Vernon and I really can't go that far

on a weeknight since I'm a single mom and it takes minimum of 2 hours to

get though my son's (age 11 on Friday) homework. If you check it out,

I'd like to hear about it also.

Thanks

>>> justin_kathi2001@... 5/10/2006 10:49:27 AM >>>

Hi ,

Where in Columbus do you live ? I am on the east side in

Reynoldsburg. There is a support near here. I have never been was going

to check it out this evening.

I think you have a great attitude about this new adventure and seem

to be preparing well.

Blessings,

Kathi

Message 22

From: " Roxanna " madideas@...

Date: Tue May 9, 2006 6:42pm(PDT)

Subject: Re: Intro

Subject: ( ) Intro

Hi, list. I have just joined because I'm going to be having a life-

changing event in the next couple months and want to get help being

prepared! My boyfriend and I live together, and he has a 10-year-

old son with Asperger's from his previous marriage. His son has

been living mostly with my boyfriend's ex-wife, especially since she

moved them to another state a year and a half ago. We are going to

be having his son with us this summer for 2 months. I've been doing

reading and of course my bf and I talk about what's coming and how

we will need to prepare. He's a great dad and a terrific bf, too -

very understanding and supportive. I'm looking for resources that

could help *me* cope with living day-to-day with an Aspie. I want

the time we spend together this summer to be as non-stressful as

possible, for all of us! I am looking at this as a growth

opportunity - I'm going to need to develop skills I have never had

to develop before. I don't want to just spend the summer trying to

leave them alone and avoid contact with his son. Trying to keep

positive, even though I'm kind of scared about the changes that are

coming!! I have been reading " Parenting your Asperger's Child " and

also read " The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night Time " for a

perspective piece. Any recommendations would be helpful! Thank you

very much in advance.

kimberly

Columbus, OH

Wow, ! Welcome to our world. Lol. My best advice is to hang

out

here. You will learn a lot just from reading posts - the good, the

bad, the

ugly. And also we will be here for when your boyfriend's son arrives

for

his visit. So you can always count on support at this end with any

questions you have.

Roxanna

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Evenings are not ideal for me either. I will let you know how it is. I am still

holding out hope for a morning one somewhere.

Kathi

Message 5

From: " Van Atta " svanatta@...

Date: Wed May 10, 2006 9:59am(PDT)

Subject: Re: Intro

Kathi,

I'm in Groveport. I've searched the web for a support group but the

only one I could find was in Mt. Vernon and I really can't go that far

on a weeknight since I'm a single mom and it takes minimum of 2 hours

to

get though my son's (age 11 on Friday) homework. If you check it out,

I'd like to hear about it also.

Thanks

>>> justin_kathi2001@... 5/10/2006 10:49:27 AM >>>

Hi ,

Where in Columbus do you live ? I am on the east side in

Reynoldsburg. There is a support near here. I have never been was going

to check it out this evening.

I think you have a great attitude about this new adventure and seem

to be preparing well.

Blessings,

Kathi

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> Wow, ! Welcome to our world. Lol. My best advice is to

hang out

> here. You will learn a lot just from reading posts - the good,

the bad, the

> ugly. And also we will be here for when your boyfriend's son

arrives for

> his visit. So you can always count on support at this end with any

> questions you have.

>

> Roxanna

>

Thanks for the welcome. I appreciate it. I have been reading the

posts, and I have to say that I don't know how some of you do it.

The amount of strength and determination I see in some of these

letters gives me hope that I can rise to my own challenge as well.

As I don't have much to contribute in the way of knowledge, I'll

mostly lurk, but as I have questions or things to share I may post

more. I do appreciate the offlist messages I have received as well,

with loads of extremely helpful links. Best to all-

kimberly

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>

> Hi ,

>

> Where in Columbus do you live ? I am on the east side in

Reynoldsburg. There is a support near here. I have never been was

going to check it out this evening.

> I think you have a great attitude about this new adventure and

seem to be preparing well.

>

> Blessings,

> Kathi

>

>

I just read one of your emails and was going to send you offlist

mail. I live just off of I-70 in what they call the west side, but

it seems very close to downtown. My (not so very good) neighborhood

is called the Hilltop. When I bought this house, I had no idea that

I'd even have a kid here, or I wouldn't have chosen it. I love my

house, but this isn't the best neighborhood at all...

kimberly

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Hi Sue,

Welcome! Your daughter sounds a lot like my son. He too has only a

few words and trouble eating and feeding himself. I hope you will

let us know what the dev. ped says and how the evaluation/exam

goes. I'd also be interested to hear about the type of speech

therapy she is getting; it sounds like you feel it is working for

her.

Glad you've joined!

Kristi

>

> Just wanted to introduce myself as I just joined the list.

>

> I'm Sue, a WOHM to two kids, a 4 yr old ds and a 19 month old dd.

DD

> has not been formally diagnosed, but both our ped and the SLP think

> she has apraxia. I am very greatful I have a very developmentally

> aware and procactive ped who referred us to an SLP at 16 months

when

> everyone around us was telling me to stop worrying, she isn't even

2

> yet. At 19 months, after two months of therapy, she can now say

mama

> and dada sometimes unprompted, baba (bottle and byebye) if

prompted,

> and her only spontaneous word " yeah " . She cannot make any o, long

e

> or long i vowel sounds. She also does not chew. She is still

eating

> thickened stage 2 baby food. She has made some feeding progress in

> that she now will pick up food and put it to her mouth.

Previously,

> she had no interest at all in table food. But she doesn't actually

> eat it. Other than that, she seems to be a healthy, happy little

girl.

>

> I ordered ProEFA yesterday, we're upping her therapy to 2x/week for

> now, and are scheduling an appt with a dev. ped. I'm told it will

> probably take several months to get in to see her.

>

> I'm just trying to learn everything I can about this new world

we've

> entered.

>

> Sue

>

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>

> Hi Sue,

>

> Welcome! Your daughter sounds a lot like my son. He too has only a

> few words and trouble eating and feeding himself. I hope you will

> let us know what the dev. ped says and how the evaluation/exam

> goes. I'd also be interested to hear about the type of speech

> therapy she is getting; it sounds like you feel it is working for

> her.

>

> Glad you've joined!

> Kristi

>

I don't know the technical terms for the speech therapy, but the SLP

plays with her and enourages her to make certain specific CV sounds,

and cues her with hand gestures.

Sue

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it sounds like a lot of a's " issues " are sensory. Look for an OT that

specializes in Sensory Intergration. THis will help with all the

noise,light,touch and personal space issues. You may have to look into private

OT services.

All the best,

Jill

" And all things, whatever you ask in prayer, believing, you will receive. " Matt

21:22

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,

I have a 10 yr old son with AS who also has alot of sensory issues. There is a

center in Roswell, GA called Children's Therapy Works. If you do a Google search

their site should come up. My son went there for a few months and it really

helped him. The center is totally devoted to sensory issues and is sent up for

hands on situations to help children with noises, personal space, smells, and

touch. It's a great place and it was really fun for my son. We are from ,

GA and it was a really long drive twice a week, but it was worth it.

Daphney

Steve & Jill Meyers <jmeyers@...> wrote:

it sounds like a lot of a's " issues " are sensory. Look for

an OT that specializes in Sensory Intergration. THis will help with all the

noise,light,touch and personal space issues. You may have to look into private

OT services.

All the best,

Jill

" And all things, whatever you ask in prayer, believing, you will receive. " Matt

21:22

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Hi!

I have been reading posts for a month or so. This is my first post. We

finally received a diagnosis for my 5 yr. old son on Friday - atypical

autism. The psychiatrist said he did not yet know whether my son would fall

under HFA or Asperger. You seem to have an idea about what the difference

between these two could be (re: your son)! Could you fill me in?! So far,

all I seem to find is that they are more or less synonymous. And yet....

Hmmm.... (By the way, I am a Canadian living in Berlin, Germany, so there

may be different diagnostic " rules " going on here, too. I simply don't know

enough about the " political " scene here in Berlin....)

I will write more of an introduction at a later time.... My Christmas

company is arriving!....

Jule

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Hi Jule,

I don't know if there is a big difference in HFA and Asperger's. I'm

new at this too.

How are you handeling the diagnosis? I know it's tough.

Liz

Houston

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>

> Hi Jule,

> I don't know if there is a big difference in HFA and Asperger's. I'm

> new at this too.

> How are you handeling the diagnosis? I know it's tough.

> Liz

> Houston

>

Hi Liz,

Thanks for responding! I think we are handling the diagnosis ok. We are

actually feeling

more relief than anything else. Now I have a better chance of " protecting " my

son in the

world - up until now I have felt that I have to constantly throw MY body into

the crossfire

to protect him. I am so exhausted from taking all those bullets all these

years. And then,

of course, being criticized for being " too anxious " and overprotective - and

being seen by

" the world " as being the CAUSE of my son's behaviour/reactions. That weighs so

heavy -

even though I never really believed it myself. It just hurts to be seen as

doing something

" wrong " when you are giving every bit of physical strength and brains and love

you have to

do what you believe is best for your child.

Hmmmm....maybe I should give a brief intro to my situation now:

It was clear to me from day one that my son was different. He was highly

sensitive to all

kinds of sensory stimuli - particularly sound. And he was very intense in an

introverted

kind of way. The nurses at the hospital were calling him " the little professor "

from the

start! He stood out. People were unnerved by how intensely he would look at

them. (This

changed at about 3 - when he started NOT being able to look at people - he

couldn't even

handle looking at PICTURES of people for a while....). We couldn't go out much

and being

around other children was usually torture (because it would get too much for

him,

particularly too loud). At about 3, his passion for music became apparent. He

became

obsessed with musical instruments, particularly TUBAS :-)! He was so

emotionally

responsive to music that we couldn't listen to ANY MUSIC AT ALL for a while. He

would

just become too overwhelmed. (Fortunately, this has changed - although we still

have to

be careful...). He would never go outside in his buggy without a collection of

music books

- usually music encyclopaedias - which just reinforced his image of being " the

little

professor " . No surprise he taught himself to read at 3. This made me think

that perhaps

my son was gifted and that this was the cause of his sensitivity and intensity

and " unusual

creativity " and " absent-mindedness " . So I fought against " pathologizing " him

for a long

time. Now it is becoming clear that we will need support for him. The school

environment

is overwhelming for him; the separation from me is very scary; the contact with

other

children or even teachers is very difficult; his anxiety levels are often

debilitating. So.

Here I am.

Hmmm... a long post.... guess I just needed to share my journey a bit. I am

really, really

exhausted and I know I can't keep this up for much longer! At the moment, my

son is in a

phase of being very compulsive with really knotted, twisted thoughts that make

him

anxious and unhappy. This is so painful to watch. Because " underneath " I see

the

creative, happy, bubbly boy, who is getting himself caught in a mental straight

jacket all

the time. I am telling myself that it won't always be like this - atleast maybe

not this

intense. Anyone have any insights on this?

OK

enough.

I am glad to be a part of this newgroup!!

Jule (in Berlin, Germany)

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Welcome! Here are some websites and articles you might want to check out.

If you have any more specific questions, do not hestitate to ask. Pam :)

_Asperger Syndrome_ (http://www.udel.edu/bkirby/asperger/)

_Asperger Info: Specially Designed Instructions For Educators: IEP

Modification/_ (http://www.udel.edu/bkirby/asperger/IEP_Modif_Checklist.html)

_Asperger Info: moreno_tips_for_teaching_

(http://www.udel.edu/bkirby/asperger/moreno_tips_for_teaching.html)

_Asperger Syndrome: Guide for Teachers_

(http://www.udel.edu/bkirby/asperger/teachers_guide.html)

_Asperger Info: IEP GOALS_

(http://www.udel.edu/bkirby/asperger/IEP_Goals.html)

_HS - Special Needs / IEP Preparation, - PageIt/Ver. 1.1_

(http://www.lcc.ctc.edu/pages/561.xtm)

_LD OnLine :: Developing Your Child's IEP_

(http://www.ldonline.org/article/6345)

_LD OnLine :: Creating Useful Individualized Education Programs (IEPs)_

(http://www.ldonline.org/article/6276)

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Good for you, it sounds like you're keeping your head up in what can be a tough

situation. You seem to have a good attitude which can be most important. We're

here for you to vent anytime! :)

sunshinelady_is_back <sally72559@...> wrote: I have a 6 yr old

boy who was recently diagnosed with aspergers. i

also have a 4 yr old boy, cameron, who is diagnosed adhd. my 14

month old daughter, kristina, seems normal thus far. well i say

normal if you count being an extreemly cute and delightful wonder of

a child. i am 43 and really too old to be trying to be a single

mother of children this young but i did not bargain for doing this

by myself when i had them. i have 2 grown children and when my

second husband and i got married he had never had kids. i told him

if we could get it done before i turned 40 it would be cool. we had

cameron 3 months before i turned 40. the 2 boys were so cute we

wondered what a girl would be like so we just didn't take any

precautions. so along came kristina. and she is so beautiful its

worth it. since my husband has beeen out of the house for about 6

months except for the occasional short visit we are learning to

adapt. it is actually less stressful in some ways with him gone.

one of the problems was that he did not have the patience to put up

with the boys when they got going. i am trying to learn as much as

i can about aspergers. i have an iep review on taylor january 9th

and i want to try and be ready to get him what he needs if i can.

any suggestions would be welcome. i am sorry if it seems like i am

rambling but it is nice to have a forum to vent some of my feelings

to people who can begin to understand where i am coming from and

where i am going. thank you for that chance.

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Hi ! I am new here too with a almost 6yr old with TS, OCD, ADHD, and I

think aspergers that is why I joined here! It sounds like you are military we

are too! We are Navy and stationed in Va!! They have a great hospital here!!!

Many blessings!!

Jo <gypsys_girl_beem@...> wrote: Hi, Im heather and my

son alex is 3 with HFA. were stationed in

germany right now, but relocating to tennesse/kentucky soon. is a

difficult kid with alot of behavior problems, agression and a

stubborn streak a mile long. I can relate to what so many posts say,

its hard to keep up.. looking forward to getting/offering advise and

stragities with you all!

__________________________________________________

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Hi ! I am new here too with a almost 6yr old with TS, OCD, ADHD, and I

think aspergers that is why I joined here! It sounds like you are military we

are too! We are Navy and stationed in Va!! They have a great hospital here!!!

Many blessings!!

Jo <gypsys_girl_beem@...> wrote: Hi, Im heather and my

son alex is 3 with HFA. were stationed in

germany right now, but relocating to tennesse/kentucky soon. is a

difficult kid with alot of behavior problems, agression and a

stubborn streak a mile long. I can relate to what so many posts say,

its hard to keep up.. looking forward to getting/offering advise and

stragities with you all!

__________________________________________________

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yes, we are military. Army. stationed in germany... heading to ft campbell.

Germany has bairly even heard of autism, and military community has next to know

services or us. we were actually told that starting a ASD support group wasnt

allowed because it would be discrimination??? Yet, ADHD has one and so does

Asthma... go figure. im really looking forward to being able to actually treat

some of the symptoms for alex.. i have read about so many treatment options...

did the research...ready to talk to a professional about his needs.. and theres

no options here!! Frusterating.. treatent available..and unable to get to it!

sorry... venting again... lol..

glad to meet you too katie!

Mefford <yankeemamma@...> wrote:

Hi ! I am new here too with a almost 6yr old with TS, OCD,

ADHD, and I think aspergers that is why I joined here! It sounds like you are

military we are too! We are Navy and stationed in Va!! They have a great

hospital here!!! Many blessings!!

Jo <gypsys_girl_beem@...> wrote: Hi, Im heather and my son alex is

3 with HFA. were stationed in

germany right now, but relocating to tennesse/kentucky soon. is a

difficult kid with alot of behavior problems, agression and a

stubborn streak a mile long. I can relate to what so many posts say,

its hard to keep up.. looking forward to getting/offering advise and

stragities with you all!

__________________________________________________

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That must be really hard being over seas!!! Does the army have an EFM program?

meaning Eceptional Family Member? The Navy does and the purpose of it is so that

you won't get stationed where they don't have the proper medical care! We got in

it before this last transfer and it was a good thing because like I said Va has

a great hospital here. Where we were in CT we really weren't getting much help

there. We didn't get dx'd till we got here! Doesn't mean that you won't run into

bad docs though because we had that experience too. Anyway vent all you want I

do it often!! This is the place to do it because we all feel the same way! Good

Luck and many blessings!

HEATHER BEEM <gypsys_girl_beem@...> wrote: yes, we are military.

Army. stationed in germany... heading to ft campbell. Germany has bairly even

heard of autism, and military community has next to know services or us. we were

actually told that starting a ASD support group wasnt allowed because it would

be discrimination??? Yet, ADHD has one and so does Asthma... go figure. im

really looking forward to being able to actually treat some of the symptoms for

alex.. i have read about so many treatment options... did the research...ready

to talk to a professional about his needs.. and theres no options here!!

Frusterating.. treatent available..and unable to get to it!

sorry... venting again... lol..

glad to meet you too katie!

Mefford <yankeemamma@...> wrote:

Hi ! I am new here too with a almost 6yr old with TS, OCD, ADHD, and I

think aspergers that is why I joined here! It sounds like you are military we

are too! We are Navy and stationed in Va!! They have a great hospital here!!!

Many blessings!!

Jo <gypsys_girl_beem@...> wrote: Hi, Im heather and my son alex is

3 with HFA. were stationed in

germany right now, but relocating to tennesse/kentucky soon. is a

difficult kid with alot of behavior problems, agression and a

stubborn streak a mile long. I can relate to what so many posts say,

its hard to keep up.. looking forward to getting/offering advise and

stragities with you all!

__________________________________________________

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,

Where in Massachusetts do you live? There's a great support group

that meets monthly in Watertown. You (or anybody else) can e-mail me

privately for more information.

Liz

On Feb 7, 2007, at 8:07 AM, *Patchoulifaery* wrote:

> Well I just tried to do this a moment ago and apparently lost it in

> cyber space somewhere.. Uncompleted at that! LOL

>

> So here I go take 2..

>

> Hi all!

> My name is and I live in Massachusetts. I am a single mom

> to a wonderful 8 year old so who has been dx'd with AS,ADHD and

> BiPolar.

> Trying to meet people who understand what you go through on a

> day2day setting is hard. I have lost " friends " as well as a

> relationship due to the stresses in my life. I have family who thinks

> my son is just spoiled because he doesn't seem to have any regards

> for what is given to him. They think lecturing him is the way to go

> when he misbehaves but deep inside I believe he just doesn't process

> and comprehend as a " normal " person does. Yes he looks like everyone

> else on the outside but he is not like everyone else...yes he will

> repeat what he is told but he doesn't apply it...

>

> I am my son's soul advocate. My best friend is a Sped teacher and

> takes care of him on Saturday nights while I work but she doesn't

> even get him...In fact she and I have had conversations about the

> training required and she never received any on the Autism Spectrum.

> What she knows is what she chose to learn on her own.I have an older

> sister who is also Sped teacher ,has been longer than my friend. She

> came out and told me my son's disability was my fault.It is a social

> disorder and I was the blame for it.. I love my son but who would

> ever ask for this?

>

> I tried joining a local group but I never received any response

> from the group so I did another search and found this one.

> All I want is someone to exchange feelings with. I need to vent

> and have someone understand what is going o and not just politely

> nod,smile and tell me it's gonna be alright. Cause it's not. Everyday

> is a new day and everyday you just hope it's a little different from

> the day before. You hope the school doesn't call to tell you what he

> did wrong again and who he hurt or what he broke.

>

> Well I guess that was quite a bit to absorb for an intro...

>

> I am gonna go now. Thanks for the group...

>

> :)

>

>

>

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Welcome ,

This is an awesome and very caring group. Sounds like you have been through

alot, I hope you can find the friendships you need here to help life go a little

better. I know this group has really helped me :-)

- C.

Mom to Cassie 15 PCOS, Austin 13 ADHD and a 3 HFA/AS & SPD/SID

----- Original Message -----

From: *Patchoulifaery*

Well I guess that was quite a bit to absorb for an intro...

I am gonna go now. Thanks for the group...

:)

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Welcome ! I am glad you have found us! Indeed it is a great group

and a wonderful group of hosts! You are always able to find support here!

( mom to Chase- and tons more LOL in Canada!)

FOR FUN and AUTISM AWARENESS GEAR GO HERE!

http://www.cafepress.com/autismawarenes

-- Re: ( ) intro

Welcome ,

This is an awesome and very caring group. Sounds like you have been through

alot, I hope you can find the friendships you need here to help life go a

little better. I know this group has really helped me :-)

- C.

Mom to Cassie 15 PCOS, Austin 13 ADHD and a 3 HFA/AS & SPD/SID

----- Original Message -----

From: *Patchoulifaery*

Well I guess that was quite a bit to absorb for an intro...

I am gonna go now. Thanks for the group...

:)

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WELCOME! To the group! You couldn't have found a more supportive bunch!

I am .. Mom to Chase and a few more!

FOR FUN and AUTISM AWARENESS GEAR GO HERE!

http://www.cafepress.com/autismawarenes

-- ( ) intro

Well I just tried to do this a moment ago and apparently lost it in

cyber space somewhere.. Uncompleted at that! LOL

So here I go take 2..

Hi all!

My name is and I live in Massachusetts. I am a single mom

to a wonderful 8 year old so who has been dx'd with AS,ADHD and

BiPolar.

Trying to meet people who understand what you go through on a

day2day setting is hard. I have lost " friends " as well as a

relationship due to the stresses in my life. I have family who thinks

my son is just spoiled because he doesn't seem to have any regards

for what is given to him. They think lecturing him is the way to go

when he misbehaves but deep inside I believe he just doesn't process

and comprehend as a " normal " person does. Yes he looks like everyone

else on the outside but he is not like everyone else...yes he will

repeat what he is told but he doesn't apply it...

I am my son's soul advocate. My best friend is a Sped teacher and

takes care of him on Saturday nights while I work but she doesn't

even get him...In fact she and I have had conversations about the

training required and she never received any on the Autism Spectrum.

What she knows is what she chose to learn on her own.I have an older

sister who is also Sped teacher ,has been longer than my friend. She

came out and told me my son's disability was my fault.It is a social

disorder and I was the blame for it.. I love my son but who would

ever ask for this?

I tried joining a local group but I never received any response

from the group so I did another search and found this one.

All I want is someone to exchange feelings with. I need to vent

and have someone understand what is going o and not just politely

nod,smile and tell me it's gonna be alright. Cause it's not. Everyday

is a new day and everyday you just hope it's a little different from

the day before. You hope the school doesn't call to tell you what he

did wrong again and who he hurt or what he broke.

Well I guess that was quite a bit to absorb for an intro...

I am gonna go now. Thanks for the group...

:)

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It's too bad the sped teachers don't get educated about autism. Now they say

the rate of autism has gone up to 1 in 150 births. They will be seeing a lot of

kids with autism, if they haven't already. Stay away from people who blame you.

That can't be good to hear all the time. I would start giving them articles you

find on the net - leave them at their homes. Or mail them. Educate them.

As for the school, I hope they have a behavior plan in place instead of just

calling you to tell you what he did wrong. And welcome to the group! Glad you

found us!

Roxanna

( ) intro

Well I just tried to do this a moment ago and apparently lost it in

cyber space somewhere.. Uncompleted at that! LOL

So here I go take 2..

Hi all!

My name is and I live in Massachusetts. I am a single mom

to a wonderful 8 year old so who has been dx'd with AS,ADHD and

BiPolar.

Trying to meet people who understand what you go through on a

day2day setting is hard. I have lost " friends " as well as a

relationship due to the stresses in my life. I have family who thinks

my son is just spoiled because he doesn't seem to have any regards

for what is given to him. They think lecturing him is the way to go

when he misbehaves but deep inside I believe he just doesn't process

and comprehend as a " normal " person does. Yes he looks like everyone

else on the outside but he is not like everyone else...yes he will

repeat what he is told but he doesn't apply it...

I am my son's soul advocate. My best friend is a Sped teacher and

takes care of him on Saturday nights while I work but she doesn't

even get him...In fact she and I have had conversations about the

training required and she never received any on the Autism Spectrum.

What she knows is what she chose to learn on her own.I have an older

sister who is also Sped teacher ,has been longer than my friend. She

came out and told me my son's disability was my fault.It is a social

disorder and I was the blame for it.. I love my son but who would

ever ask for this?

I tried joining a local group but I never received any response

from the group so I did another search and found this one.

All I want is someone to exchange feelings with. I need to vent

and have someone understand what is going o and not just politely

nod,smile and tell me it's gonna be alright. Cause it's not. Everyday

is a new day and everyday you just hope it's a little different from

the day before. You hope the school doesn't call to tell you what he

did wrong again and who he hurt or what he broke.

Well I guess that was quite a bit to absorb for an intro...

I am gonna go now. Thanks for the group...

:)

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Guest guest

Hi melanie,

welcome!!

i had hand surgery (huge cyst) wednesday, so sorry for short one hand

typing.

as far as what you said, been there, doing that!!!

these are things we have to deal with. so bad isn't it? but it makes

us have to grow and educate others. makes us smarter.

recently my DH moved out. he says maybe temp, i am thinking may

permanent is good.

i have 3 with A.S. and you can bet life is easier when there isn't

yelling and putting down around us. my youngest is SO relax. it has

been one week. wow.

hang in there. this is a great group. everyone is supportive, and so

great.

keep writing,

B

>

> Well I just tried to do this a moment ago and apparently lost it in

> cyber space somewhere.. Uncompleted at that! LOL

>

> So here I go take 2..

>

> Hi all!

> My name is and I live in Massachusetts. I am a single mom

> to a wonderful 8 year old so who has been dx'd with AS,ADHD and

> BiPolar.

> Trying to meet people who understand what you go through on a

> day2day setting is hard. I have lost " friends " as well as a

> relationship due to the stresses in my life. I have family who

thinks

> my son is just spoiled because he doesn't seem to have any regards

> for what is given to him. They think lecturing him is the way to go

> when he misbehaves but deep inside I believe he just doesn't

process

> and comprehend as a " normal " person does. Yes he looks like

everyone

> else on the outside but he is not like everyone else...yes he will

> repeat what he is told but he doesn't apply it...

>

> I am my son's soul advocate. My best friend is a Sped teacher and

> takes care of him on Saturday nights while I work but she doesn't

> even get him...In fact she and I have had conversations about the

> training required and she never received any on the Autism

Spectrum.

> What she knows is what she chose to learn on her own.I have an

older

> sister who is also Sped teacher ,has been longer than my friend.

She

> came out and told me my son's disability was my fault.It is a

social

> disorder and I was the blame for it.. I love my son but who would

> ever ask for this?

>

> I tried joining a local group but I never received any response

> from the group so I did another search and found this one.

> All I want is someone to exchange feelings with. I need to vent

> and have someone understand what is going o and not just politely

> nod,smile and tell me it's gonna be alright. Cause it's not.

Everyday

> is a new day and everyday you just hope it's a little different

from

> the day before. You hope the school doesn't call to tell you what

he

> did wrong again and who he hurt or what he broke.

>

> Well I guess that was quite a bit to absorb for an intro...

>

> I am gonna go now. Thanks for the group...

>

> :)

>

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Guest guest

Welcome ! I'm new to the group too. My son was also just diagnosed with

AS and ADHD- they sure seem to go hand in hand! I'm so sorry for the pain you

feel when others don't understand-- Totally been there!! When our son was

between the ages of 2-4 he would just " flip out " . He wouldn't speak to anyone-

only meowed like a cat and we don't even have a cat, haha. We saw MANY, MANY

signs early on that something was " not right " but did not get any help from our

doctors and were often blamed for needing to give him more discipline,

etc...basically- our fault and our problem. Problem with that theory is we

tried anything and everything to discipline and many things made it worse. I'm

not saying you shouldn't discipline...ALL children need boundaries, but not

discipline a child for doing something they physically can't help.

When our son was dx'd our doctor tried to " break the news " to us very gently

(she's really sweet) and I think was a little shocked when our reaction was a

kind of " duh " we have known that for years (only nicely of course). I'm just

excited for your son and mine that we did get the dx even if it did take a long

time to get it. I've found a HUGE change in how people see and treat my child

when I tell them that he has mild autism. For the most part people have been

more patient and understand. I hope this ends up being the case to you too.

By the way...I know it hurts when people put the blame on you. It comes from

a lack of either understanding or uncaring. For example: I'm epileptic and

have had the first doctors tell me that " it's all in my head " like I was faking

it for attention or something- that was because they couldn't care less about

doing tests and getting to the bottum of the problem (uncaring). My Grandmother

thinks it's my fault in a way. She loves me and means well but her comment came

from lack of understanding not uncaring. Forgive and try to shake it off (I

know easier said then done). If you don't it's only yourself you will continue

to hurt. Then keep fighting to get your son all the help he needs. If the

doctor isn't working with you- keep looking until you find one that will. If

the teacher isn't working with you- see if you can change teachers or schools

until you can find one that will...whatevers best for your son is worth fighting

for and unfortunatly we have to do that

sometimes.

I hope this group is as much of a blessing to you as it's been to me.

Joyfully,

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Hi

I can totally relate to the " duh " response :-)

I have never heard it explained as mild autism...I think that's a neat way of

putting it so people can understand

- C.

Mom to Cassie 15 PCOS, Austin 13 ADHD and a 3 HFA/AS & SPD/SID

----- Original Message -----

From: Laughlin

.....

When our son was dx'd our doctor tried to " break the news " to us very gently

(she's really sweet) and I think was a little shocked when our reaction was a

kind of " duh " we have known that for years (only nicely of course). I'm just

excited for your son and mine that we did get the dx even if it did take a long

time to get it. I've found a HUGE change in how people see and treat my child

when I tell them that he has mild autism. For the most part people have been

more patient and understand. I hope this ends up being the case to you too.

.......

I hope this group is as much of a blessing to you as it's been to me.

Joyfully,

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