Guest guest Posted November 13, 2004 Report Share Posted November 13, 2004 Jeanie, You could certainly try to broach the subject with her. When I explained to a group of kindergarten kids in the class I worked with about the little boy who I work with, I simply told them that when some kids are born, they aren't as healthy as other kids and they need things to help them like glasses, hearing aids, etc. Would she understand the concept of healthy though I guess is the question...it's worth a try to start introducing the topic, you could use pictures of babies, some with no medical stuff around them and some with medical equipment around them to introduce healthy and not healthy when born. Let me know how it goes; maybe I could get something ready and when I come down to visit you at Christmas, we could do it with the girls together so Kennedy could be another girl we could tell her who wasn't as healthy and needed help with some things when she was born. We could then tell her about some babies that didn't need help with some things and were healthier when they were born. Let me know what you think... Lis Jeanie Colp wrote: For several months I've been trying to come up with a way to make MacKenzie be more accepting of the necessary modifications (especially in school) needed to help her function. This is a major problem for her. She will not accept any different paper work, devices or even presentation from what the other kids get. Although I'm glad that her social awareness is so high, her work is suffering and in turn she becomes frustrated with that as well. I'm wondering if it's not time to TRY to explain CHARGE to her. She certainly knows that there are things that are different about her, but I think she sees this as a bad thing. This is going to be something that she'll have to cope with forever and I'm wondering how to help her embrace her differences and help her to help herself. I know that CHARGE itself may be over her head, but when did your kids realize that they have CHARGE. Is age 6 to early to tackle this? Keep in mind, MacKenzie's favorite TV show is Trauma, Life in the ER. So she's very interested in people that have similar life experiences. Jeanie Colp mom to MacKenzie 6 CHARGE Membership of this email support groups does not constitute membership in the CHARGE Syndrome Foundation. For information about the CHARGE Syndrome Foundation or to become a member (and get the newsletter) please contact marion@... or visit the CHARGE Syndrome Foundation web page at http://www.chargesyndrome.org 7th International CHARGE Syndrome Conference, Miami Beach, Florida, July 22-24, 2005. Information will be available at our website www.chargesyndrome.org or by calling 1-. In Canada, you may contact CHARGE Syndrome Canada at 1- (families), visit www.chargesyndrome.ca, or email info@.... Thank you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 13, 2004 Report Share Posted November 13, 2004 Jeanie- I don't think it's necessarily too early, although each child is different. Aubrie understands that she has CHARGE, that her ears and eyes don't work well without help, that her hips weren't working so the dr fixed them, etc. She's got a very accepting personality so she doesn't have a problem with having her aid, preferential seating, etc. She told me the other day, " Now I walk like everyone else " -- and she does -- her gait is much more " normal " after her hip surgery. I asked who told her that and she didn't know so I don't know if someone said something or if she came up with it on her own. She's seen her baby pictures and I've told her about how sick she was and nurses helped me take care of her. We still see most of her nurses and therapists from infancy -- either they are still on her team at school or we see them in the community. So she is fully aware of all the people in her life from early on and why they were there. Plus she's been to CHARGE conferences from the beginning. She's met Patty too. For us, it's been a part of our conversations from the beginning. She hasn't yet expressed dismay at being different, wishing she didn't have CHARGE, etc. So-- I don't think it's too early. But how to help MacKenzie accept and understand her differences... that I'm not sure. It's surely helpful to have Kennedy as a friend so that she isn't the only one in her world like her. I'm sure there are many others on the list who will be waiting to hear what you find that works so that they can be prepared with their child as the time comes. Good luck- Michele W Aubrie's mom 6 yrs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 13, 2004 Report Share Posted November 13, 2004 My nephew has CP, which impacts the right side of his body. The muscles on that side are very tight making use of his hand etc. difficult. In 5th grade he was on a basketball team. During one of the breaks he sat on the bench to tie his shoes. One of the other boys leaned over and tied Dylan's shoes for him, then the two got up and went back out on the court. There was no awkwardness, no being embarrassed, no teasing. It was so natural between the two of them, but we couldn't help but cry. I heard another kid ask this same nephew why his hand didn't work and he just shrugged and said, " That's just how I was born. " I know that his self-accepting matter of fact attitude is what lead to the basketball experience being no big deal. Later he rode bulls in high school rodeo. He was never a child who was victimized or picked on by other kids. I don't know how he came to that matter of fact attitude. I don't think it was taught to him. It just was. On a side note, Doe(Intervener)was concerned about a social situation at school for Dylan where she felt the other boys were " ditching " Dylan. I told her he could still participate and that I would celebrate the day when he knew he was being ditched. Kim Re: talking about CHARGE Jeanie, You could certainly try to broach the subject with her. When I explained to a group of kindergarten kids in the class I worked with about the little boy who I work with, I simply told them that when some kids are born, they aren't as healthy as other kids and they need things to help them like glasses, hearing aids, etc. Would she understand the concept of healthy though I guess is the question...it's worth a try to start introducing the topic, you could use pictures of babies, some with no medical stuff around them and some with medical equipment around them to introduce healthy and not healthy when born. Let me know how it goes; maybe I could get something ready and when I come down to visit you at Christmas, we could do it with the girls together so Kennedy could be another girl we could tell her who wasn't as healthy and needed help with some things when she was born. We could then tell her about some babies that didn't need help with some things and were healthier when they were born. Let me know what you think... Lis Jeanie Colp wrote: For several months I've been trying to come up with a way to make MacKenzie be more accepting of the necessary modifications (especially in school) needed to help her function. This is a major problem for her. She will not accept any different paper work, devices or even presentation from what the other kids get. Although I'm glad that her social awareness is so high, her work is suffering and in turn she becomes frustrated with that as well. I'm wondering if it's not time to TRY to explain CHARGE to her. She certainly knows that there are things that are different about her, but I think she sees this as a bad thing. This is going to be something that she'll have to cope with forever and I'm wondering how to help her embrace her differences and help her to help herself. I know that CHARGE itself may be over her head, but when did your kids realize that they have CHARGE. Is age 6 to early to tackle this? Keep in mind, MacKenzie's favorite TV show is Trauma, Life in the ER. So she's very interested in people that have similar life experiences. Jeanie Colp mom to MacKenzie 6 CHARGE Membership of this email support groups does not constitute membership in the CHARGE Syndrome Foundation. For information about the CHARGE Syndrome Foundation or to become a member (and get the newsletter) please contact marion@... or visit the CHARGE Syndrome Foundation web page at http://www.chargesyndrome.org 7th International CHARGE Syndrome Conference, Miami Beach, Florida, July 22-24, 2005. Information will be available at our website www.chargesyndrome.org or by calling 1-. In Canada, you may contact CHARGE Syndrome Canada at 1- (families), visit www.chargesyndrome.ca, or email info@.... Thank you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 13, 2004 Report Share Posted November 13, 2004 Vicki- Welcome! My mom has been very supportive and helpful which has made a huge difference to me. She has sat through every surgery with me and I know she'd drop everything to come if I needed something bad enough. As Kim said, CHARGE is doubly hard for her cuz she feels pain for me and for my daughter. But that puts her in a unique position to support me -- no one else cares about me as much as she does and I need support through this as much as Aubrie does. Let us know specifically what questions you are having now and we'll do our best to help you out. Welcome to the CHARGE family-- Michele W mom to Aubrie 6 yrs CHaRgE and 13 yrs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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