Re: Post op life changes

October 10, 2000

In a message dated 10/10/00 8:56:11 AM Eastern Daylight Time,

blinddog1996@... writes:

> What changes have you all experienced after and during the

> weight coming off, both in you and in other people? Jobs, relationships,

> friends .....

Russ you have been doing well.

When I first had lost about 30lbs I wanted people to say they noticed but

they didn't so I got pissed. But they had seen me loose before then gain it

back. Plus I'm real short so it really didn't show. I didn't tell everyone

about the oper. so they think I 'm just doing it by Dr,Atkins. Now they say

something sometimes. I'm still going thru the full gambit of emotions on a

daily and weekly basis. When strangers notice me and speak (They would look

away before) or hold the door I am ticked for a second. These are the things

I have to work thru and understand. This week I'm back at water arob,

so depending on the group, mornings have older ladies even older than me they

are very nice but on Tues. and Thu the group is late afternoon they are

snotty, thin girls that

don't want a fatty near them. But I going in today anyway. My friends are all

still there

for me and I love them for that.

NORMA IN MASS

267/184/119

RNY12/9/99 DR,s Brig. Woman's

Hernia-2 TT DR. Randall 2001 ?

October 10, 2000

Russ,

I experienced the bad, and the good. I got depressed at times, some time

much worse than others. I became a stronger person, don't take crap from

anyone any more due to my self confidence. I find that people that never

acknowledged me, now suddenly do, so I ignore them. If they didn't like me

190 pounds heavier, I don't need them now. My relationship has been

wonderful since both before, and now we're getting married in 2 months! My

job, well, umm...that's a completely different story, I can't get into right

now. My very good friends have been there through " thick and thin " (no pun

intended), but often times make comments such as " You seem so much happier

now " , " You go out more " , " You ASK to go out more " etc...Some friends seem a

bit jealous at times, but I just tell them that I have been thru a lot with

my weight struggles through life, and if they're overweight, and can do it

without surgery, go for it, I personally needed this to help ME, and NOBODY

else. They just zip their lips, and go on their merry way!

How about you?

Dawn

Post op life changes

Just curious. What changes have you all experienced after and during the

weight coming off, both in you and in other people? Jobs, relationships,

friends .....

Russ

304/239/175

open rny 08/01/00

Dr. S. Randall LMH

October 10, 2000

Very well spoken Pam, sounds like you're really on the right track honey!!!

Dawn

Re: Post op life changes

Russ,

You say changes?? In my case what hasn't changed?? I have gone

through, loving everyone because this weight is coming off and I feel

great!! To hating everyone, still feeling great but not understanding

why people seem to try to make me feel bad because I'm losing weight. My

husband was pissing me off just by looking at him. He is gone M-F so

when he was home on weekends it was awful. I felt I had no control over

my kids. Friends started to treat me differently, just by saying very

insulting things like: OH MY GOD!! You weigh LESS then me!!. I'm fatter

then you now? And this one happens alot from one person,(( When you

exercise your whole body jiggels.)) And SHE knows I know this and it

really bothers me but she still has to point it out. Another person acts

like she doesn't even want to be around me anymore. I could go on and

on, but since I started Therapy it's all been explained to me. None of

these things are my fault. It's because they are really unhappy with

them self but I'm the one doing something about it and it makes them

angry. For what ever the reason it's not fare but that's what has

happened to me. On the other hand my Family has been great!! My Husband

and kids did not change it is my relationship with food that has changed

and I was having a hard time figuring that out. That was why I was

thinking everything was so out of control. When ever something made me

angry or happy or whatever I went to food. Now I can't do that and I

didn't know what to do with my emotions so I got mad at the world. I am

handling anger better and I know that's because I started Therapy. The

people who do treat me differently, Well I know now that's their issue

not mine. It still bothers me a great deal but I'm handling it and not

taking it so personal now. This surgery has been the best thing I have

ever done in my life. I would not take back any part of it. My marriage

seems to be getting stronger all the time. my kids are the best in the

world,still drive me crazy but, hey they are kids.LOL And the more I

talk about it the easier it becomes. I think the future holds wonderful

things for me and I never could of figured that out if it wasn't for this

group. I may not reply to every post but you all are very important to

me. Post op life changes are a bitch but I wouldn't have it any other

way.

Pam

Dr. Thayer Oct 12, 1999

320/190/???

Exercise 3xwk,still hate it.

On Tue, 10 Oct 2000 08:54:54 EDT blinddog1996@... writes:

> Just curious. What changes have you all experienced after and during

> the

> weight coming off, both in you and in other people? Jobs,

> relationships,

> friends .....

>

> Russ

> 304/239/175

> open rny 08/01/00

> Dr. S. Randall LMH

>

> -------------------------- eGroups Sponsor

>

October 10, 2000

Russ,

The one major change I have noticed in me is that I don't take any

bull from anyone anymore. Of course I have also given up smoking and that may

have something to with it. But, I guess I have decided that if I can go

through this, then stupid people are not to be bothered with. How did it

affect you?

Don

October 10, 2000

Pam,

You described just how I feel perfectly. When I said to Russ that I

don't take crap anymore I don't think I explained clearly. What I meant is

that if somebody says something insulting to me, then I either give it back

to them or treat them with contempt. I really appreciate the people that were

there for me but I refuse to deal with pinheads like your friends who still

make snide remarks. Thank you

Don

October 10, 2000

In a message dated 10/10/00 2:47:19 PM Eastern Daylight Time,

huggybuggy@... writes:

> .their brains aren't big enough to think

> before talking!

>

> Dawn

SO right !!!!!

NORMA IN MASS

October 10, 2000

Dawn, it is to a certain degree, I will grant you. But, the overall thing is

that I am not going to put with phonies, people who are full of themselves,

fools who don't know what they're talking about but think they do and people

who make these little remarks. Actually I was like this to a degree before

the surgery, but now it has been reaffirmed. My friends know what I'm really

ike and that I will always be there for them. I'm not mad at the world but

just a little fed up, that's all

Don

October 10, 2000

Don,

Did you quit smoking for surgery? How long after were you able to tolerate

the cigs?

Kim

October 10, 2000

Pam,

It sounds right but I didn't want to give the impression that I am

looking for a fight or that my guard is up all the time. It's just that

people feel that they can say anything to overweight people and get away with

it. When they say they didn't mean it like that, I ask then what did they

mean? Or if they say that I'm more sensitive now, I say " Not more sensitive,

just more aware. " The very fact that you called them on it real make them

realize what a stupid thing they have said and that you have feelings as

well. Your true friends will realize it and apologize. Boy Russ, You opened

up a can of worms with this one? I glad he asked because it makes for a

lively discussion don't you think Pam?

Don

October 10, 2000

Kim,

No I quit before the surgery because I had a pleasant little nine day

stay in the hospital in May. The reason for that is that I could not breathe

and I was gasping for air like a fish out of water and it turned out that I

had Atrial-Fibrillation (sp?) and fluid around my lungs and heart. So, it's

been a hell of a year for mae and my wife. She had surgery in June. (she is

doing just dandy) and then I had my surgery in August. Man I need a freaking'

break LOL. That's the reason I quit.

Don

October 10, 2000

Alica A,

That's probably the best example of what really ticks me off. If they

were sitting with a Black person would they make the same rude comments? Or

someone of Spanish descent? That never ceased to amaze me. The difference is

then I didn't call them on it but now I do

Don

October 10, 2000

In a message dated 10/10/00 4:45:34 PM Eastern Daylight Time, pking1@...

writes:

> I lost 32 pounds so far and

> am walking and doing stairs (slowly) And the good little pouch tells me if

> I'm on track. Priscilla

Boy your doing great!! I used to go up the stairs one at a time now I can go

right up no problem. But I can't do more than three laps. I just got home

from my first aerobics in two months boy am I tired but happy that I got out.

Now I have to finish off my water.

NORMA IN MASS

267/184/119

RNY12/9/99 DR,s Brig. Woman's

Hernia-2 TT DR. Randall 2001 ?

October 10, 2000