Guest guest Posted March 23, 2000 Report Share Posted March 23, 2000 , I too have a drink now and then. When I take my dad out to the doctor's or just to get him out of the personal care home he's in, he likes to eat out somewhere. I started having a cocktail with him. I find I have no desire or compulsion to drink like I used to (a big bottle of wine or a couple six packs 3-4 times a week, drinking at home, alone, till I could hardly walk). I had 8 years without a drink. I attribute this change in attitude about drinking for myself to something like what Peele says - maturing out of it. Overall I think I've made peace with myself, my personality, my interests and also the external stuff like my husband wanting a divorce and missing my stepson. I'm probably quite boring to other people, but too bad! I'm really content overall with what I do workwise, and at home, with gardening and the household stuff and reading and getting on this computer. Am I sober? You betcha I am! jan " wendy rose " wrote: original article:/group/12-step-free/?start=13685 > Been there done that and yes, they do think I'm drinking alcoholically. > I think it very sad to see people I used to consider my friends making > a judgment as absolute as that. And I used to be one of them. But it > is true; how they think. > > Thanks for your response and support. > > > > " janice m. young " wrote: > original article:/group/12-step-free/?start=135 57 > > > So as far as that goes, if I drink and DON'T get drunk, I'm still > > sober? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yes, I believe so and probably most people in the world do too. AA > > defines sobriety as walkin' talkin' 12 steps, slogans and meetings > > meetings meetings. Anything else is a dry drunk. Also if you have > ever > > sat in a meeting and said 'hi I'm xxxx, I'm an alcoholic " and you stop > > going to meetings and after a period of time you find you can have a > > drink now and then without reverting to your old habits, to AA, you're > > drinking again and it is assumed that you are drinking alcoholically. > > > > > jan > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 24, 2000 Report Share Posted March 24, 2000 Hi , Yes, those AA's were wrong. To tell someone that if they drink again they will die would give them no chance at " maturing out. " Don't get me wrong, I am very careful about having a drink. And 99% of the time, I don't. However, I do like having that 1% as an option. In AA that 1% meant sure death. To me, it allows me the choice and takes all of the pressure off of complete abstinence. Now, I'm free to get on with life. I was thinking about some of my old AA " pals " (yea, right) and how they would take the way I feel about things now. They wouldn't and couldn't possibly understand. So now I am thinking that it is quite ridiculous of me to even keep any line of communication open with them. There just isn't one. So, I guess I am to the point now of truly closing the door on my AA experience. That feels great. And to , you are right, I don't need to hear AA " bashing " when just the truth about them will do. Sue > >Reply-To: 12-step-freeegroups >To: 12-step-freeegroups >CC: 12-step-freeegroups >Subject: Re: Anti/Pro >Date: Fri, 26 Mar 1999 00:54:08 -0500 > > > > >Sue, > >I don't know if it's necessary to point out, but I don't think that >matuing out is true for everyone, although from what I seen personally, >it is more common than is recognized. I am 35, for example, am in a >steady relationship, and have a full tome job. I still find, though, >then when I drink, I still find it so hard to stop at " sociable levels, >that it not worth trying, and is pretty risky really. I am grateful to >writers like Peele, however, for pointing out that the choice is mine. I >am not powerless over whether to pick up a drink. It is interesting to >hear your and Jan's stories, however, since according to AA doctrine, >they are never supposed to happen. Maybe those AAs were wrong,eh? > > >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >Play Games, Have Fun, Win a Trip - at pogo.com! What's the best game >you have ever played? Chances are it's at pogo.com. Visit today and >enter our $25,000 Games for Everyone sweepstakes! Refer your friends > & earn extra entries! >http://click./1/1470/1/_/4324/_/953876654/ > >-- Create a poll/survey for your group! >-- /vote?listname=12-step-free & m=1 > ______________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 24, 2000 Report Share Posted March 24, 2000 , actually I wasn't a 'real alkieholic'. jan sean p cashin wrote: original article:/group/12-step-free/?start=13905 > > > Sue, > > I don't know if it's necessary to point out, but I don't think that > matuing out is true for everyone, although from what I seen personally, > it is more common than is recognized. I am 35, for example, am in a > steady relationship, and have a full tome job. I still find, though, > then when I drink, I still find it so hard to stop at " sociable levels, > that it not worth trying, and is pretty risky really. I am grateful to > writers like Peele, however, for pointing out that the choice is mine. I > am not powerless over whether to pick up a drink. It is interesting to > hear your and Jan's stories, however, since according to AA doctrine, > they are never supposed to happen. Maybe those AAs were wrong,eh? > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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