Re: Coats.....?

[Guest guest]

>We've discussed having her sterilized

> too but we're not making any decisions yet.

>

> Tina

This would scare me only because 'humanitarian' interest groups who've never

HAD a special-needs child love to seize on things like that. Would

something like that be likely to happen where you are? It happened to a

woman in BC; it was HORRIBLE. They made her into some kind of monster in

the media. Said she was interfering with her barely-functioning

twenty-year-old son's human rights. Of course, you know if that boy

fathered a baby, they'd be screaming at her over the added burden to the

welfare and health-care system.

Jacquie

[Guest guest]

Jacqui does this ALL the time! I can tell when they are on backwards cuz

she's always pulling them out of her butt!

:-)

Penny

Re: Coats.....?

> > What if you would buy a iron on or some kind of little thing like

> > that where you could put it on a bra.

Then again... just thinking here....

has a terrible time putting her panties on the right direction.

If I ironed on a picture of a cartoon character, she should be able

to use that to help her remember how to put them on right.

(wonder if I could do something like that with her shoes since she's

too big for the character shoes....)

Thanks!

Tina

[Guest guest]

> Jacqui does this ALL the time! I can tell when they are on

backwards cuz

> she's always pulling them out of her butt!

>

LOL! Same here! I'll ask her if they're on right and she'll insist

they are, but she's grabbing for them every 5 minutes. I've

threatened to buy her thong underwear because that would be even

harder to put on backwards... but knowing , she would. ;o)

Tina

[Guest guest]

This is one thing that I am SO not looking forward too. With all of

Jacqui's bathroom issues, I don't know HOW she's going to be able to manage

her period...

*sigh*

Penny

Re: Coats.....?

> i am very worried of just that..something

> like this happening, and her not understanding

> what is going on...

> nancy

It's one of the reasons I've talked to her pediatrician and my gyn

about putting her on birth control pills once she starts her periods.

I don't see ever being able to take care of herself fully, so

there is no way she can take care of a child. We'll probably retain

legal custody of her once she turns 18. There's so much still up in

the air about her developement. We've discussed having her sterilized

too but we're not making any decisions yet.

Tina

[Guest guest]

> This is one thing that I am SO not looking forward too. With all of Jacqui's

bathroom issues, I don't know HOW she's going to be able to manage her period...

*sigh*

Penny <

i hear you penny. loud and clear :'(

" Something important to remember...we'll always be who we are. " - Mr.

[Guest guest]

> This is one thing that I am SO not looking forward too. With all of

> Jacqui's bathroom issues, I don't know HOW she's going to be able

to manage

> her period...

>

> *sigh*

Yeah, with constantly stuffing up the toilet with rolls (not

just wads, but entire rolls) of toilet paper, I'm scared to death to

see how she's going to handle pads. *shudder* And I just know I'm not

going to get lucky and have her start late. I just know it.

Tina

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 9/27/2002 12:09:12 AM Eastern Standard Time,

danaar1@... writes:

> Yeah, with constantly stuffing up the toilet with rolls (not

> just wads, but entire rolls) of toilet paper, I'm scared to death to

> see how she's going to handle pads. *shudder* And I just know I'm not

> going to get lucky and have her start late. I just know it.

>

My boys' barber has an adult daughter who is mentally challenged. She told

me one day how she taught her daughter about having her period. She said she

started way before the period was going to start wearing pads. She called it

" big lady " . Then by the time her daughter's period started she was used to

wearing the pad and she taught her to change them often. She said she went

through lots of pads. She still calls it " big lady " and it is funny to hear

in the salon that when the hairdressers have their period they call it " big

lady " too...it became a phrase they all use. Pam

[Guest guest]

> My boys' barber has an adult daughter who is mentally challenged.

She told me one day how she taught her daughter about having her

period. She said she started way before the period was going to

start wearing pads. She called it " big lady " . Then by the time her

daughter's period started she was used to wearing the pad and she

taught her to change them often. She said she went through lots of

pads. She still calls it " big lady " and it is funny to hear in the

salon that when the hairdressers have their period they call it " big

> lady " too...it became a phrase they all use. Pam

>

LOL! Now that's a phrase I've never heard used to describe it before.

I have been thinking about having her try to wear a pad before her

period actually starts because of the sensory issue. I'm hoping she

doesn't get too upset about it. The new thinner pads may be a big

help there.

Tina

[Guest guest]

The new thinner pads may be a big

> help there.

>

> Tina

i wear the pads myself and when

jenna comes into the bathroom with

me, which is almost all the time...

and see's it, she says 'momma has a

diaper on'...LOL...i guess cause

she see's rachelle in a diaper, maybe

she thinks its the same...she hasn't

worn a diaper for a few years...So

i really don't know how she will ever

handle it...i really can't see it

ever happening

nancy

[Guest guest]

You might try telling her its a

> band-aid instead of a diaper?? Just a thought.

>

> Tina

to jenna, a band-aid, is not something

she likes...she remembers getting a bandaid

after getting shots...(oh those great memories

they have, don't help sometimes

so, thanks for the help..but we'll have

to think of something else i think

nancy

[Guest guest]

Tina wrote:

> I have been thinking about having her try to wear a pad before her

> period actually starts because of the sensory issue. I'm hoping she

> doesn't get too upset about it. The new thinner pads may be a big

> help there.

>

> Tina

Tina, I don't know if she is even aware of this being in her future or

not, but I have also heard of women when explaining what would happen to

their girls they would explain that it is an important event in her life

and then plan for something special to happen to co-incide with the

onset of her menstruation. For example, I always thought if I had a

daughter I would tell her that she could have her ears pierced when she

got her first period to celebrate " womanhood " or something like that.

Of course that may not be of any help with and ASD girl who may not even

want her ears pierced, but you can probably think of something she would

like to be old enough to do and hold it out to her as something to look

forward to. ???

Just musing,

~ Karin

[Guest guest]

> to jenna, a band-aid, is not something

> she likes...she remembers getting a bandaid

> after getting shots...(oh those great memories

> they have, don't help sometimes

Oh, not good. Okay, that won't work either. loves to play with

the bandaids so it works for her. Sorry. )

Tina

[Guest guest]

Oh, not good. Okay, that won't work either. loves to play

with

> the bandaids so it works for her. Sorry. )

>

> Tina

don't ever be sorry for trying to help...

i appreciate any kind of help..even if

it doesn't work

thanks--

nancy

[Guest guest]

> Tina, I don't know if she is even aware of this being in her future

or not, but I have also heard of women when explaining what would

happen to their girls they would explain that it is an important

event in her life and then plan for something special to happen to co-

incide with the onset of her menstruation. For example, I always

thought if I had a daughter I would tell her that she could have her

ears pierced when she got her first period to celebrate " womanhood "

or something like that.

>

She seems to be aware that this is something she will go through. But

her question was, " When my period starts, when will I have a baby? "

*cold shudders* She's serious. She wants a baby. She has NO clue what

the entails, she can't even feed her fish, but she wants a baby. She

wants to get married, have a house of her own and have babies. *more

cold shudders*

She has her ears pierced already but I think maybe making a bit of

a " ceremony " of some sort might be helpful to her and her sister. I

just have to figure out what to do....

And NO Sami may NOT get her belly button pierced no matter how many

times she asks. And NO definitely is NOT having a baby to

celebrate. *lots and lots more cold shudders*

Tina

[Guest guest]

And NO definitely is NOT having a baby to

> celebrate. *lots and lots more cold shudders*

>

> Tina

WOW...I am *shaking* right here,

with you...yikes

nancy :/

[Guest guest]

> don't ever be sorry for trying to help...

> i appreciate any kind of help..even if

> it doesn't work

> thanks--

> nancy

I'm not sorry for trying to help, just sorry that I couldn't actually

be of any help. )

Tina

[Guest guest]

Tina wrote:

> She seems to be aware that this is something she will go through. But

> her question was, " When my period starts, when will I have a baby? "

>

> *cold shudders* She's serious. She wants a baby. She has NO clue what

> the entails, she can't even feed her fish, but she wants a baby. She

> wants to get married, have a house of her own and have babies. *more

> cold shudders*

Maybe you can tell her how much it hurts to have a baby and how much

blood there is. (The complete opposite of what you might tell a child

so that they wouldn't fear having a baby, but in this case it might be

something to consider...)

~ Karin

[Guest guest]

> > Tina,

> >

> > I have seen bras with Mickey Mouse and Winnie the Pooh at Sears

and

> Zellers. Would she like either of these?

> >

> > Tuna

Did you ever try to get iron on decals/or a patch and put them on her

bras or underwear? Just an idea.....

Amy mom to

Noah 6 Lucas 8 ASD;s

[Guest guest]

Now there's a terrible catch 22! You want to tell her how to not be taken

advantage of by the boys, but you don't want her to know how to make baby's.

Ewwww, scarey thought! Good touch bad touch and no mention of babies?

How about a celebration dinner at her favorite diner?

Sue

[Guest guest]

> Did you ever try to get iron on decals/or a patch and put them on

her bras or underwear? Just an idea.....

>

I have some iron on paper for the computer printer. I'm going to

print up some small pictures and put them on the front of her

underwear so she remembers to put them on the right direction.

Tina

[Guest guest]

> Now there's a terrible catch 22! You want to tell her how to not

be taken advantage of by the boys, but you don't want her to know how

to make baby's.

> Ewwww, scarey thought! Good touch bad touch and no mention of

babies?

>

She already knows that sex results in babies. We used to breed

Labrador. So she understands that sex has to happen before babies can

be born. But I don't think she has any clue what sex entails. Other

than kissing. I have told her that she MUST be married before she can

have a baby because babies need daddies. Yeah, I know, there are a

lot of kids out there without fathers and 2 parent families, but she

understands rules like that so I'm using it until she questions it!!

> How about a celebration dinner at her favorite diner?

She LOVES movies, especially cartoons so maybe we could do that and

dinner out. ) Thanks for the suggestion.

Tina

[Guest guest]

I bet you're real glad she's a stickler for rules right now! By the way,

even if I was a single mom, I'd still tell my kids their supposed to be

married before they have babies!

Sue

[Guest guest]

How old is ? My sister is MR and she was married a couple of

years ago and just this sept 1st I went to her son's 1st birtday

party. I am not saying that this is what will happen for or

that it probably will. Just something to think about. But you know

your daughter best.

Jacquie H

> She seems to be aware that this is something she will go through.

But

> her question was, " When my period starts, when will I have a baby? "

>

> *cold shudders* She's serious. She wants a baby. She has NO clue

what

> the entails, she can't even feed her fish, but she wants a baby.

She

> wants to get married, have a house of her own and have babies.

*more

> cold shudders*

>

> She has her ears pierced already but I think maybe making a bit of

> a " ceremony " of some sort might be helpful to her and her sister. I

> just have to figure out what to do....

>

> And NO Sami may NOT get her belly button pierced no matter how many

> times she asks. And NO definitely is NOT having a baby to

> celebrate. *lots and lots more cold shudders*

>

> Tina

[Guest guest]

My sister is MR and she was married a couple of

> years ago and just this sept 1st I went to her son's 1st birtday

> party.

Jacquie H

really???

how is she dealing with all of that?..

marriage, and a baby? if i may be so

bold to ask

and how is the baby? this is just

sooooo cool....tho i really can't

imagine jenna like this...but i guess,

who knows?????

thanks

nancy

[Guest guest]

> How old is ? My sister is MR and she was married a couple of

> years ago and just this sept 1st I went to her son's 1st birtday

> party. I am not saying that this is what will happen for or

> that it probably will. Just something to think about. But you know

> your daughter best.

> Jacquie H

is 10 almost 11. My husband had an aunt that was MR who was

married until she died just a few years ago. She and her husband

never had children. She wasn't capable of taking care of one but she

would have loved to have had a whole house full.

might be able to handle a baby when she grows up but I

sincerely doubt it. She would have to make some major leaps in her

development. She has done that in the past but I haven't seen

anything like that in about a year and a half now, so I have my

doubts. I would like to be more optomistic and I hope proves me

wrong, but I just don't see it happening at this point.

Tina