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Re: venting and anger

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Yes deep down she does. She is just fighting against everything about you at

the moment. The best title of a BPD book I ever read was " I Hate You, Don't

Leave Me " Avery good description!

Hugd

Kelley

Re: venting and anger

Does she even remember that I exist at this point?

Jean

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Oh Jean

don't think of that will only worry you more. i am glad you are seeing the

attorney again!

Hugs

Kelley

Re: venting and anger

Kelley

Thank you. I just got off the phone with the attorney I spoke with last

week. She said 's current behavior puts a new light on things. I am

meetin with her tomorrow.

Also, I know I am getting crazy, but that girl who drowned her 2 little boys

in S Carolina a few years back because her boyfriend didn't want them around;

that keeps going thru my mind or what's left of it.

Jean

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Jean—

I live in S Carolina, and know you are speaking of . The

coverage here was astronomical because she lived abut a few counties away.

Just remember this: your daughter is NOT . Your grandchildren

are NOT in the care of !!! Sure, you can spend time beating

yourself over the head with the thought something like that may happen to

your grandkids if you want to. But, you DO have a CHOICE as to what you

think of. Me, I would prefer to believe that my detective and/or attorney

was going to help me wrest control of those precious grandkids from her

grasp!!

Kelley’s right—you’ve got to be mentally prepared for that! That means

being strong and ready to embrace them in your loving arms. You can’t

afford to fall apart now!!! Also, most communities have a crisis help line

of some sort. Find out what is available in your community, and exploit it

ruthlessly.

Luck to you,

katie

Re: venting and anger

Kelley

Thank you. I just got off the phone with the attorney I spoke with last

week. She said 's current behavior puts a new light on things. I am

meetin with her tomorrow.

Also, I know I am getting crazy, but that girl who drowned her 2 little boys

in S Carolina a few years back because her boyfriend didn't want them

around;

that keeps going thru my mind or what's left of it.

Jean

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Jean

BOTH!

When you finish go to helens world resources think i sent the link earlier and

it has some more explanations.....

here is her top 40 list for BPD reference.....a lot of good stuff there!

custody stuff too!

http://www.bpdresources.com/top40.html

Take that book to your attorney as well or mention it at least!

Hgus

Kelley

Re: venting and anger

I just got back from the bookstore. I bought " I Hate You Don't Leave Me "

and I went to lunch and read some of it. I read something in the middle of the

book that said, that the current relationship they're in when it gets too

close, they will sabotage because they're uncomfortable with intimacy. That

would

make me think she might dump dirtbag, but then another section talked about

how they will go back and forth with those guys who abuse them. So, which is

it?

Jean

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Jean

That is a good question, but I dont think they do. I think it is more a stuggle

to be in control, and the need to be in control. So even if they cannot control

themselves if they can control thier surroundings and those in thier

surroundings there is some comfort, I could be wrong though.

Kelley

Is having power over someone something they strive for?

Jean

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With my bp dtr, once she FINALLY decides the guy isn't what she wants or

needs, she dumps them without EVER going back to them. BUT, in the

meantime, she goes back and forth while she's deciding.

So, with my kid, it's been BOTH!!

Re: venting and anger

I just got back from the bookstore. I bought " I Hate You Don't Leave Me "

and I went to lunch and read some of it. I read something in the middle of

the

book that said, that the current relationship they're in when it gets too

close, they will sabotage because they're uncomfortable with intimacy. That

would

make me think she might dump dirtbag, but then another section talked about

how they will go back and forth with those guys who abuse them. So, which

is

it?

Jean

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Absolutely, they get a rush! The whole pushing people away, and not letting

you see your grandkids, etc. has to do with the bp not feeling in control,

and a desperate effort to feel some personal power.

Re: venting and anger

I was just reading an article on power and power plays. It wasn't in

relation to bps specifically. My question is do bps get a rush from power

over

others? Is having power over someone something they strive for?

Jean

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