Re: Ideas for parents who want to help but are totally busy

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 5/1/00 11:58:48 PM Eastern Daylight Time,

listenup@... writes:

> , as always, you're full of wonderful ideas.

>

> Kay

>

Kay, I was thinking exactly the same thing, smile!

Thanks , you gave me just the right ideas on how *I* can give back a

little.

Orla : )

[Guest guest]

> they can call you

> and you can provide support that way. Like a circle. It only takes a few

> minutes to be reassuring, give tips on schools or whatever

Even if you don't think you have knowledge to share, think about how you

felt after your child was diagnosed and you were able to talk to someone

else who has " been there " . That in itself can be a big comfort.

Sometimes you can help others without even realizing it. When JD was about 2

1/2 years old, we were waiting in the audiologist's waiting room. After we

had been there about 35 minutes I heard an elderly gentleman say to his

companion, " You know, I think I'm going to dig my hearing aids out of the

drawer and give them another try. If that little boy can be so happy wearing

them, then maybe I can too. " So I guess I would add to the list, just

conduct your lives and treat how you deal with it all as if someone may be

influenced by what you do. Do what you do with pride. You just never know

who will be helped by your positive attitude.

, as always, you're full of wonderful ideas.

Kay

[Guest guest]

Thanks for the really great ideas -- I know how busy life with kids

is, but it really means so much to do any of these. And it makes you

feel good to help out someone else.

>I read a post about parents who want to be able to support other parents,

>but have so much to do they think they can't help (I know about being busy)

>but here are a couple things we do in our community to help each other out.

>I hope none of you take this as being pushy or telling you you SHOULD go

>help somebody - it's just a few things learned over the years (or recently

>as last week) that could make a difference.

>

>There are family support centers where you can leave your name, and if

>another mom/dad has a child recently diagnosed as deaf - they can call you

>and you can provide support that way. Like a circle. It only takes a few

>minutes to be reassuring, give tips on schools or whatever and give them the

>Listen Up website url. Our family support center is called Rainbow and is

>part of our Regional Center (for children w/disabilities). (or your child's

>audiologist).

>

>Another really simple thing - the next time you go to Mc's, ask for

>the deaf or hearing/speech impaired menu. Chances are the counter person

>won't know where it is - but they'll know for next time, and the next time a

>deaf child comes in they'll know what to do. Plus our kids feel great when

>they can order on their own.

>

>Chances are your child is one in a handful of 6 deaf kids that get bussed

>out to another district. Some weekend pick up another one of the kids and

>do the park or whatever. I've seen with Hayley that the kids really get a

>kick out of it because they don't live in the same neighborhood so only see

>each other during the week.

>

>Print out " Mothers of Handicapped Children " and " Welcome to Holland " and

>when you meet someone who needs something when they find out their child

[Guest guest]

Another really simple thing - the next time you go to

Mc's, ask for

the deaf or hearing/speech impaired menu. Chances are

the counter person

won't know where it is - but they'll know for next

time, and the next time a

deaf child comes in they'll know what to do. Plus our

kids feel great when

they can order on their own.

Ok, this is probably a weird question, but what

exactly is this menu?? I have never heard of such a

thing and we practically live at Mcs!

J.

--- " E. Mapa " wrote:

> I read a post about parents who want to be able to

> support other parents,

> but have so much to do they think they can't help (I

> know about being busy)

> but here are a couple things we do in our community

> to help each other out.

> I hope none of you take this as being pushy or

> telling you you SHOULD go

> help somebody - it's just a few things learned over

> the years (or recently

> as last week) that could make a difference.

>

> There are family support centers where you can leave

> your name, and if

> another mom/dad has a child recently diagnosed as

> deaf - they can call you

> and you can provide support that way. Like a circle.

> It only takes a few

> minutes to be reassuring, give tips on schools or

> whatever and give them the

> Listen Up website url. Our family support center is

> called Rainbow and is

> part of our Regional Center (for children

> w/disabilities). (or your child's

> audiologist).

>

> Another really simple thing - the next time you go

> to Mc's, ask for

> the deaf or hearing/speech impaired menu. Chances

> are the counter person

> won't know where it is - but they'll know for next

> time, and the next time a

> deaf child comes in they'll know what to do. Plus

> our kids feel great when

> they can order on their own.

>

> Chances are your child is one in a handful of 6 deaf

> kids that get bussed

> out to another district. Some weekend pick up

> another one of the kids and

> do the park or whatever. I've seen with Hayley that

> the kids really get a

> kick out of it because they don't live in the same

> neighborhood so only see

> each other during the week.

>

> Print out " Mothers of Handicapped Children " and

> " Welcome to Holland " and

> when you meet someone who needs something when they

> find out their child

> isn't what they had thought - give it to them.

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

________________________________________________________________________

> Get Your Private, Free E-mail from MSN Hotmail at

> http://www.hotmail.com

>

>

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

Ok, this is probably a weird question, but what

exactly is this menu?? I have never heard of such a

thing and we practically live at Mcs!

J

it is a picture menu. There is a picture of each item and one can

simply point to what they want to order. You have to ask for one, of course

if a Deaf person goes into Mcs alone I guess asking for one might be

more of a pain than writing down what you want.

RoseAnn

[Guest guest]

Ohhhhhhh, ok, Thank you RoseAnn!!

--- MDUPLAN wrote:

>

> Ok, this is probably a weird question, but what

> exactly is this menu?? I have never heard of such

> a

> thing and we practically live at Mcs!

>

> J

>

> it is a picture menu. There is a picture of

> each item and one can

> simply point to what they want to order. You have

> to ask for one, of course

> if a Deaf person goes into Mcs alone I guess

> asking for one might be

> more of a pain than writing down what you want.

>

> RoseAnn

>

>

> [Non-text portions of this message have been

> removed]

>

>

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

Thanks for the Reminders!!!!!!

Tracey

Mother of Andria-moderate-severe Hearing Loss

-LD, & Isabelle-so far so good =D

________________________________________________________________________

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[Guest guest]

Hi Suzy

This is a really great idea; if I may make a comment - there is another

booklet called OPTIONS which I have a copy of which really does tell you all

your options.

A guy I know from another list, whose children are implanted, cue, and use

ASL helped write it. Kay, Sherry, Orla - do any of you have the contact

info for that booklet?

>From: suzymaners@...

>Reply-To: Listen-Upegroups

>To: Listen-Upegroups

>Subject: Re: Ideas for parents who want to help but are totally

>busy

>Date: Tue, 2 May 2000 20:02:38 EDT

>

>Thanks for all the ideas:

>

>I have an idea that I'm getting ready to do. There is a website that

>advocates the oral approach for deaf/hh children called www.oraldeafed.com.

>They have great videos and brochures that you can order for free. I ordered

>several and I am going to take them along with AG Bell's brochure " So Your

>Child Has A Hearing Loss: Next Steps For Parents " to my pediatrician's

>office, my ENT, audiologist, and early intervention office. When my

>daughter

>was diagnosed with her loss, the only approach I knew of was sign language.

>When she started therapy at early intervention, the only ones they made me

>aware of were total communication and sign language. The AG Bell brochure

>very wonderfully spells out all of the approaches for communication, and an

>amazing amount of information on what a parent should do next. No one in

>any

>of the medical offices gave me anything like this or told me anything about

>anything. I am going to request an appointment with these doctors and

>others

>and ask them to look at the videos and read the brochures and see if they

>will give the brochures and maybe even videos to parents of newly diagnosed

>children so that these parents can make some informed decisions regarding

>hearing aids, implants, funding, early intervention, special ed services,

>and

>communication approaches. I feel like I was in the dark for way too long

>regarding all of these issues for my daughter. Now I have lots of

>information

>and this would be a great way to pass it along. I'll even leave my name and

>number with these offices for the doctors to give to parents of newly

>diagnosed children. When it all happened to us, we felt so alone. And

>really,

>there is only one other child near us that we have been in contact with who

>has a hearing loss. Of course there are more in the area. I just want to be

>able to help anyone if I can.

>

>Suzy

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[Guest guest]

Thanks for all the ideas:

I have an idea that I'm getting ready to do. There is a website that

advocates the oral approach for deaf/hh children called www.oraldeafed.com.

They have great videos and brochures that you can order for free. I ordered

several and I am going to take them along with AG Bell's brochure " So Your

Child Has A Hearing Loss: Next Steps For Parents " to my pediatrician's

office, my ENT, audiologist, and early intervention office. When my daughter

was diagnosed with her loss, the only approach I knew of was sign language.

When she started therapy at early intervention, the only ones they made me

aware of were total communication and sign language. The AG Bell brochure

very wonderfully spells out all of the approaches for communication, and an

amazing amount of information on what a parent should do next. No one in any

of the medical offices gave me anything like this or told me anything about

anything. I am going to request an appointment with these doctors and others

and ask them to look at the videos and read the brochures and see if they

will give the brochures and maybe even videos to parents of newly diagnosed

children so that these parents can make some informed decisions regarding

hearing aids, implants, funding, early intervention, special ed services, and

communication approaches. I feel like I was in the dark for way too long

regarding all of these issues for my daughter. Now I have lots of information

and this would be a great way to pass it along. I'll even leave my name and

number with these offices for the doctors to give to parents of newly

diagnosed children. When it all happened to us, we felt so alone. And really,

there is only one other child near us that we have been in contact with who

has a hearing loss. Of course there are more in the area. I just want to be

able to help anyone if I can.

Suzy

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 5/2/2000 8:49:29 PM Eastern Daylight Time,

maryemapa@... writes:

<< A guy I know from another list, whose children are implanted, cue, and use

ASL helped write it. >>

There is a booklet called " Opening Doors- Options........ " (I forget the rest)

that was written by several parents and professionals but I can't put my hand

on it at the moment. I think it is distributed through one of the hearing

aid companies. If the person you mention is who I think it is he was a big

part of it. If I find it I will post it. I am moving furniture around and

am in a state of disarray!

Elaine

Cueing Mom to Jake/6yrs/Clarion CI/2-99

[Guest guest]

Just a small correction -- it is oraldeafed.org, not .com

Sheri

[Guest guest]

> I have an idea that I'm getting ready to do.

Great idea, but I'd like to mention one thing. I suggest you ask your doctor

or audiologist (or even yourself) to order a bunch of " Open Doors - Options

in Communication and Education for Children Who are Deaf or Hard of Hearing

and is sponsored by Oticon and the Academy of Dispensing Audiologists (ADA).

To get a free copy contact either of the sponsors or call .

This is an excellent publication, and covers quite a bit of ground. It

includes information about all the communication options and goes into some

of the basics about getting services started for your child. Then if parents

are interested in the oral option, the other stuff would be appropriate

(including info about the free 6 month AG Bell membership for parents of

newly diagnosed kids & the Correspondence course). Also include

info about the free first year membership in the American Society for Deaf

Children for those who are not interested in the oral approach.

I happen to feel strongly that parents should be informed of ALL of their

options in an unbiased way, and the booklet I suggest does that. Only then

can they pick the option that's right for their child and the family. While

I believe in the oral option (obviously since my son is oral), I am the

first to admit that it's not right for every child or every family.

Kay

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 5/2/00 10:29:25 PM Eastern Daylight Time,

beat4girl@... writes:

<< << A guy I know from another list, whose children are implanted, cue, and

use

ASL helped write it. >>

There is a booklet called " Opening Doors- Options........ " (I forget the

rest)

that was written by several parents and professionals but I can't put my

hand

on it at the moment. >>

Duh! All this talk about it and I've had it all along! It's called " Open

Doors: Options in Communication and Education for Children Who are Deaf or

Hard of Hearing " . It was being distributed at the Florida Oral Convention on

the Oticon product table. The booklet was published by an all volunteer team:

Dr. I. Berlin, Ms. Ann Bleuer, Mr. Osmond Crosby, Mr. Craig Darrah,

Ms. Amy Hurowitz-Crumrine, Ms. Sandy Mosetick (Coordinator), Dr.

Quenin, and Ms. Rothwell-Vivian and by the generous sponsorship of

Oticon, Inc., and the Academy of Dispensing Audiologists (ADA).

To obtain copies of the booklet contact Oticon, http://www.oticonus.com or

the ADA, http://www.audiologist.org. I'm gonna get more copies of this one

too to give to the doctors, etc.

Suzette

[Guest guest]

Thank you, I didn't catch my mistake.

Suzette

[Guest guest]

Actually, Barb, I agree with you. I had trouble the first time. Call that

Mcs or one close to it, and ask for the manager. Then ask for the

regional office and complain to them. However, I am still waiting for my

free value meals after my calling the corporate office.

" There are more on order but they threw them away??? " that is pretty

pathetic. So much for the loving commercial.

>

>Reply-To: Listen-Upegroups

>To: <Listen-Upegroups>

>Subject: Re: Ideas for parents who want to help but are totally

>busy

>Date: Fri, 5 May 2000 21:48:32 -0400

>

>

> > Another really simple thing - the next time you go to

> > Mc's, ask for

> > the deaf or hearing/speech impaired menu. Chances are

> > the counter person

> > won't know where it is - but they'll know for next

> > time, and the next time a

> > deaf child comes in they'll know what to do. Plus our

> > kids feel great when

> > they can order on their own.

>

>

>Ok, We went to Mcs tonight, they had the sign on the door about the

>picture menu. I asked, the counter person did not know what it was. She

>asked a manager who told her they were under the counter. They were unable

>to be found. So the manager told me they didn't have any.

>

>I pressed the point and said they had a sign on the door. After sighing

>heavily this manager went to look herself. She came back and said they

>threw them away but had more on order. I asked to talk to the manager,

>that

>was when she told me she was the manager but that she asked the BIG manager

>and that is what he told her. I asked to speak to him but he refused to

>come out of the back and talk to me.

>

>This all took place about 8 miles from the state school for the deaf. I

>thought people in this area would be more aware.

>

>Barb

>

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[Guest guest]

are they violating ADA by NOT providing the menus? As far as I know they

are the only ones that do offer menus for people with special needs.

I also didn't take it as them offering me coupons to forget they were in

violation. Are they in violation? If so, what about the many many

resturaunts - including privately owned - are they in violation too?

>From: beat4girl@...

>Reply-To: Listen-Upegroups

>To: Listen-Upegroups

>Subject: Re: Ideas for parents who want to help but are totally

>busy

>Date: Fri, 5 May 2000 23:09:06 EDT

>

>In a message dated 5/5/2000 10:54:00 PM Eastern Daylight Time,

>maryemapa@... writes:

>

><< Then ask for the

> regional office and complain to them. However, I am still waiting for my

> free value meals after my calling the corporate office.

>

> " There are more on order but they threw them away??? " that is pretty

> pathetic. So much for the loving commercial.

> >>

>

>What nerve they have to offer free food to try to get you to " forget " they

>are violating the ADA. Surely it covers this, doesn't it??? BESIDE the

>false

>advertisement that they have these things available for our children.

> Maybe we on the list should start a going to all the fast food places,

>asking for it and then when they don't produce them we can spring on them

>that they are in violation of ADA. Get the information about the managers

>and bombard the corporate office with complaints. I'd be MORE than willing

>to boycott Mcs.

>Just a thought,

>Elaine

>

>

>Cueing Mom to Jake/6yrs/Clarion CI/2-99

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[Guest guest]

In a message dated 5/5/2000 10:54:00 PM Eastern Daylight Time,

maryemapa@... writes:

<< Then ask for the

regional office and complain to them. However, I am still waiting for my

free value meals after my calling the corporate office.

" There are more on order but they threw them away??? " that is pretty

pathetic. So much for the loving commercial.

>>

What nerve they have to offer free food to try to get you to " forget " they

are violating the ADA. Surely it covers this, doesn't it??? BESIDE the false

advertisement that they have these things available for our children.

Maybe we on the list should start a going to all the fast food places,

asking for it and then when they don't produce them we can spring on them

that they are in violation of ADA. Get the information about the managers

and bombard the corporate office with complaints. I'd be MORE than willing

to boycott Mcs.

Just a thought,

Elaine

Cueing Mom to Jake/6yrs/Clarion CI/2-99

[Guest guest]

> Another really simple thing - the next time you go to

> Mc's, ask for

> the deaf or hearing/speech impaired menu. Chances are

> the counter person

> won't know where it is - but they'll know for next

> time, and the next time a

> deaf child comes in they'll know what to do. Plus our

> kids feel great when

> they can order on their own.

Ok, We went to Mcs tonight, they had the sign on the door about the

picture menu. I asked, the counter person did not know what it was. She

asked a manager who told her they were under the counter. They were unable

to be found. So the manager told me they didn't have any.

I pressed the point and said they had a sign on the door. After sighing

heavily this manager went to look herself. She came back and said they

threw them away but had more on order. I asked to talk to the manager, that

was when she told me she was the manager but that she asked the BIG manager

and that is what he told her. I asked to speak to him but he refused to

come out of the back and talk to me.

This all took place about 8 miles from the state school for the deaf. I

thought people in this area would be more aware.

Barb

[Guest guest]

beat4girl@... wrote: >>

> What nerve they have to offer free food to try to get you to " forget " they

> are violating the ADA. Surely it covers this, doesn't it??? BESIDE the false

> advertisement that they have these things available for our children.

> Maybe we on the list should start a going to all the fast food places,

> asking for it and then when they don't produce them we can spring on them

> that they are in violation of ADA.

I agree that when there are violations, it is really important to document them

and complain to the appropriate person or agency. Definitely!

I did want to add, though, that about 2 weeks ago my daughter and I stopped in

at a Mac's for a milkshake. I asked the waitress for the picture menu and

she took

a few seconds but then realized where it was and got it out for us. My daughter

who is deaf then proceeded to make her order. She was really pleased to be

understood

so easily in a restaurant.

We then sat at a table drinking our milkshakes and signing and presently a woman

employee who had been cleaning up some of the counters came over and asked me if

she

could give a mini ice cream cone to Kendra. She seemed to be wanting to make

connections and this was her way to do it.

That day when I left Mac's I was really pleased that Kendra had had such a

positive experience there that day.

So, it does sound like some of the restaurants are complying and others not. I

think you are right we should make complaints when we find violations. And of

course

write thank yous when things are done right.

Keedy

portland, OR

[Guest guest]

They don't have menus you can just take home for the next time. It's like a

16x16cardboard with pictures of the food and short description next to it.

It's plausible that a drink did spill on it; but I thought it was the kind

of cardboard you can wipe off.

>

>Reply-To: Listen-Upegroups

>To: <Listen-Upegroups>

>Subject: Re: Ideas for parents who want to help but are totally

>busy

>Date: Sat, 6 May 2000 07:42:09 -0400

>

> > I did want to add, though, that about 2 weeks ago my daughter and I

>stopped in at a Mac's for a milkshake. I asked the waitress for the

>picture menu and she took

>

>

>What is this picture menu like? Is it plastic or paper? The restaurant we

>went to said that a drink had been spilled on theirs and so they threw them

>away. Are these disposable?

>

>Barb

>

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[Guest guest]

> are they violating ADA by NOT providing the menus? As far as I know they

> are the only ones that do offer menus for people with special needs.

>

> I also didn't take it as them offering me coupons to forget they were in

> violation. Are they in violation? If so, what about the many many

> resturaunts - including privately owned - are they in violation too?

I would have taken the coupons but none were offered. I did send an email

to their corporate headquarters explaining what had happened. I'll let you

know if I get a reply. Here's the email address if anyone else wants to

write and ask why they are spending all the money to print the menus,

distribute the menus, advertise the menus, and then have such poor execution

at the consumer level.

mcdfct@...

Barb

[Guest guest]

> I did want to add, though, that about 2 weeks ago my daughter and I

stopped in at a Mac's for a milkshake. I asked the waitress for the

picture menu and she took

What is this picture menu like? Is it plastic or paper? The restaurant we

went to said that a drink had been spilled on theirs and so they threw them

away. Are these disposable?

Barb

[Guest guest]

Hi Barb,

The menu we saw was definitely plastic coated - like laminated. I would really

wonder why the restaurant you went to didn't have laminated menus. Perhaps the

one we

visited did it themselves? I don't know. But your question is a good one.

Certainly plastic coated would seem important. It was not disposable and not

given to us.

It had a clear picture of each item and underneath was the printed word. So

there was a picture of a large shake and small, etc. It seemed like there were a

couple of

menus in the spot the waitress retrieved it from. I can go back and get more

details.

Keedy

Portland, Or

brogers wrote:

> > I did want to add, though, that about 2 weeks ago my daughter and I

> stopped in at a Mac's for a milkshake. I asked the waitress for the

> picture menu and she took

>

> What is this picture menu like? Is it plastic or paper? The restaurant we

> went to said that a drink had been spilled on theirs and so they threw them

> away. Are these disposable?

>

> Barb

[Guest guest]

At 09:48 PM 5/5/00 -0400, you wrote:

>Ok, We went to Mcs tonight, they had the sign on the door about the

>picture menu. I asked, the counter person did not know what it was. She

>asked a manager who told her they were under the counter. They were unable

>to be found. So the manager told me they didn't have any.

>

>I pressed the point and said they had a sign on the door. After sighing

>heavily this manager went to look herself. She came back and said they

>threw them away but had more on order. I asked to talk to the manager, that

>was when she told me she was the manager but that she asked the BIG manager

>and that is what he told her. I asked to speak to him but he refused to

>come out of the back and talk to me.

>

>This all took place about 8 miles from the state school for the deaf. I

>thought people in this area would be more aware.

Welcome to the world our children will inherit. All the advocacy and

awareness means nothing if execution is left to those who could care less.

Chris

<< Christofer deHahn......Director of Information Technology >>

<< Chiliad Publishing.............Amherst, Massachusetts, USA >>